Went a little crazy making these covers. I could have made so many more with all the inspo images I have saved for this fic.

Go read it here if you haven't already: He stings like he means it (He's mean and he's mine) by @iamgalicia

However, the unofficial date when it all started for me, was four days ago. On November 13th I received a DM from @laurelwen, regarding a series of posts I had made hinting at the possibility of a Like Minds story I had in the works. At the time all I had was this edit and the concept of a chapter that lacked proper context.

If they hadn't reached out to me, I don't think HSHM would've happened. I had a strong vision, but no clear goals, just a sense that I needed to do something. Before HSHM I had never successfully written a long, multi chaptered story. It was scary, I'm not a native speaker and it felt like no one would care about my little fic.

Turns out I was wrong

I want to thank everyone that was there when it all started, before I had the best beta reader in the world, to everyone that kept showing up even as my pace slowed down, and everyone still discovering this story today, and making me relive the joy of accomplishing it. But my biggest thank you goes to @laurelwen for showing me support from the start, for all the advice, the ramblings, the holding out hope that I would eventually get this done, even when I was so sure that it wouldn't happen. I know it was a journey for you too, and I'm so thankful I was able to do this by your side.

I'm not exaggerating when I say that this project changed my life, so to everyone that was even remotely touched by it, I'm glad that we could share this journey in any way.

Remember: I'm always open to talk about HSHM, what was written and what was not.

I leave you with the song that inspired the title: Honey by Halsey

He stings like he means it - he's mean and he's mine.

A lot of my thoughts about her were thrown into the mix while talking to @gali-in-distress about HSHM fic. Given that Patrick Malahide was actually around 60 yrs old during filming, I just extrapolate that to assume Ian is the same age, and that means he was 43 when Alex was born. I like to think the mom was significantly younger than him, at least by 10 years.

I like to think she was also Scottish, a ginger with freckles and big green doe eyes--it's not like Alex got all that from his dad. A little gangly and awkward, intelligent, a bit sarcastic, and maybe the only person who could get away with taking the piss out of Ian - and he needed that, needed to laugh and to laugh at himself specifically. She must have fallen in love with him for *some* reason, and I think it's because he was different before she died. He would have still been just a teacher then, stern probably, but not so grim. I think she had a softening effect on him, basically.

What I can't decide is what I think she did for a living and how they would have met. She could have been a teacher as well, or support staff at a school. She could have just as easily been in some other field entirely, and they just happened to encounter each other in the wild.

His wife was already pregnant when he was offered the headmaster job, the Order coming through for him. With that prestigious position and the money that came with it, he could give his new family security and comfort. He's been headmaster for 17 years, which means Alex was born either shortly before or just after he took the job. I like to think it was just after. There's something so horrible about reaching the pinnacle of your ambitions and feeling like everything is perfect only to have it ripped away.

On the day his son was born, his wife was taken away suddenly, tragically, trading one life for another. All the joy he might have felt about the birth of his son is intrinsically tainted by the loss of his wife, and that entanglement just never really goes away. It permeates his entire relationship with his son.

Was he at work when his wife went into labor? How long did it take him to get away and make it to the hospital? If he had been there earlier, might things have gone differently? Torture that man with guilt, even if it's misplaced. Give him ambivalence about the very job he was reaching for all those years.

So what about the rest of her family? It's really hard for me to imagine Alex with doting grandparents. It's also very easy to imagine that in his grief, Ian threw himself into his work and tried to avoid anything that reminded him of his dead wife, and I think that could include his wife's family. Maybe they tried to stay involved, for Alex's sake, but trips to visit them when he was a baby slowly dwindled and when Alex was finally in school, stopped altogether. Ian told them it was a distraction from his studies. So maybe they're still out there, but Alex doesn't have any kind of relationship with them, and barely remembers any of them.

I think Ian was raised the way he's raising Alex - cold, rigid, emotionally repressed - and if it was good enough to make a success out of him, then it will do the same for Alex. Since he's older, maybe one or both of his parents are gone, and even if not, they don't have that close, nurturing type of dynamic that would make them indulgent and loving grandparents.

And meanwhile, Ian watches his son grow up and start to look more and more like the wife he mourns, and even start to act like her, talk like her. Except when Alex pushes back, takes the piss, it's just intolerable to Ian. It was endearing in his wife, but now it's like twisting the knife in the wound. When Alex pleads for the things he wants with those big starry eyes, it's like looking at a ghost--but instead of softening and giving in, it just makes Ian harder and more resolute.

Not on brand?? Hoo boy, I'm the number one fan and advertiser for "He stings like he means it (He's mean and he's mine)" by @gali-in-distress aka IAmGalicia on AO3. 16 chapters of Nigel Lives fix it AU. Full disclosure, I'm slightly biased because I did beta read for it, but it's widely known as a crowd favorite apart from any bias.

IAmGalicia also wrote another short post-movie fic where Nigel lives, with a very different idea: My love, the reason I survive (Trust we'll be together soon).

I have contributed one fic as well, but it's not...exactly in the category you're looking for. (link here if you want to check it out)

We're currently sitting at 154 total on AO3, which is a far cry from where we started 3+ years ago--at 17 total fics. It's hard to recommend any others because everyone's tastes and squicks are different.

The first chapter is short and it feels like I just watched the movie and felt the need to do something about it