#howons

Taehyun and Sungwoon use their height to their advantage to go trick-or-treating as a couple in diy costumes while their friends get wasted at a huge Halloween bash. They return back home to check out their loot and trade candy- having no sympathy for their roommate, Jaehwan, who’s hogging the toilet.

(Jung Sewoon/Kim Jaehwan) crossposted on AO3!

Sewoon is Jaehwan's sunshine.

alternatively, the three times Jaehwan sang for Sewoon and the one time Sewoon sang for him instead.

❤️️ 1.

The microphone is adjusted and someone clears their throat into the microphone. The whole cafeteria turns to look, including the junior that Jaehwan was hoping to impress. "This song is dedicated to Jung Sewoon." The butterflies in his stomach grow as Jung Sewoon's eyes light up in recognition. His lips form a single sentence: Jaehwan hyung, what are you doing?

Listen to this, Jaehwan tries to communicate with his eyes, I'm trying to tell you something.

He begins to sing. "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine." Sewoon's hands fly to his mouth as red rapidly colours his cheeks. His eyes open wide and he blinks furiously in shock.

"Is this a dream?" He asks Gwanghyun. "Is my crush actually telling me that he's in love with me?"

Gwanghyun shrugs unhelpfully. "It is what you want it to be. He could also be telling you that he hates you if he's allergic to the sun." That earns him a smack across the shoulder.

When the song ends, a pink Jaehwan walks as coolly as he can to Sewoon. "So, what did you think?"

"I thought it was great," Sewoon says breathlessly. "You were great."

"Did you like it?" The butterflies threaten to spill from Jaehwan's mouth, they're causing such a frenzy in his stomach.

"I loved it." Sewoon whispers shyly as Jaehwan's lips twitch up into a smile, revealing his teeth.

"I like you." The butterflies come forth as words, carrying Jaehwan's feelings with them. "I've liked you ever since I saw you practising with your friend for the annual showcase held by the school."

Sewoon beams back at Jaehwan. "I really like you too."

The cafeteria bursts into applause. People come over to thump Jaehwan on the back and offer Sewoon congratulatory words, but the newly formed couple only have eyes for each other, slowly leaning in until their lips meet in a sweet kiss.

This is met with raucous cheering and hoots which continue even after they separate, cheeks tinted pink. Principal BoA has to come and silence everyone, but even then, she gives them a supportive wink as she leaves.

Gwanghyun watches them leave hand-in-hand with a fond expression. Looks like he'll be seeing less of Sewoon nowadays.

❤️  2.

Jaehwan strums his guitar experimentally. He leans into the microphone, taking a deep breath. "Everyone," he greets the audience, "I was nervous about doing this in the middle of Hongdae, but I was assured this would be okay. Today, I'll sing a song dedicated to my favourite dongsaeng." Sewoon shoots him a thumbs up from the front row, smiling widely. "I'll begin singing 'You are my sunshine', by Johnny Cash."

Jaehwan's beautiful voice serenades the crowd as they sway along, hushed whispers travelling around about how lucky his partner must be to have such a great catch by their side. Sewoon tries not to grin too widely.

"You make me happy," Jaehwan winks at Sewoon, "When skies are grey."

Sewoon laughs as Jaehwan attempts to turn 'You are my sunshine' into a more rock style to appeal to Sewoon's secret love for rock music. He'll give Jaehwan a quick kiss later on in the confines of Jaehwan's car.

"You did well today, hyung," Sewoon tells him as they grab ice cream together. Chocolate for Jaehwan, strawberry for Sewoon. "Particularly loved that ad-lib."

Jaehwan face lights up in a pleasant smile. "Ah, you liked it? I was just trying something out."

Sewoon hums in agreement. "Almost like the time you confessed to me in front of the entire school, that was a day to remember." He feigns sadness and pouts. "You don't do anything so romantic for me anymore. Looks like chivalry really is dead."

Jaehwan's eyes sparkle with mischief. "Romantic, you say?" Abruptly, he stands up, nearly knocking over Sewoon's Americano. 

Sewoon very nearly drops his ice cream in shock. 

“Jaehwan hyung, what-”

"Jung Sewoon!" He yells, causing all the patrons to turn their heads and stare. When Sewoon talked about the time he was confessed to, he didn't mean that he wished to relive the attention placed on him. "I love you!" Jaehwan forms a heart over his head with his arms and bends his knees. "Do you love me too?"

Sewoon ducks his head and laughs. When it's clear thar Jaehwan expects an answer, he shouts back. "Yes! I love you too!" He winks at Jaehwan and he bursts out into his trademark psychotic laughter, knees knocking into each other as he topples from the chair onto the ground.

His boyfriend laughs at his plight as he goes to help Jaehwan up. "Yah," Sewoon snorts, "Did you literally just fall for me?"

Minhyun sighs from behind the counter. "Young love, isn't it sweet?"

Jonghyun looks up from where he's dutifully scooping ice cream into a cup for their most regular customer, Yoo Seonho. "Minhyun-ah, we're not that old."

Minhyun sighs again and stares back at Sewoon and Jaehwan who are caught up in their own little world. "Still," he says, eyes not leaving the pair, "They're such a cute couple. I hope they last long."

❤️ 3.

"Sewoonie, wake up." Jaehwan snuggles up to Sewoon. "Come on, it's time for work."

There is no response. Sewoon sleeps on, curling up against his pillow.

"Yah, Jung Sewoon, are you ignoring me?" The only response is a grunt as Sewoon rolls over, hand smacking Jaehwan in the nose as he does so. "I swear if you don't-"

"Shh," Sewoon mumbles, "Not now, hyung. 'm trying to sleep."

"That's the whole problem." Jaehwan leans down. "If you don't wake up, then I won't give you a kiss!"

Sewwon cracks a sleepy eye open and Jaehwan almost coos. Almost. "Doesn't matter," Sewoon mumbles, "You've given me enough already."

Jaehwan begins to roll him around the bed in frustration. "Sewoonie, you have to wake up already. You'll thank me for this later, c'mon."

Sewoon loops an arm around Jaehwan's neck and pulls him down onto the bed beside him. "Less talk, more sleep, hyung." He pecks Jaehwan on the lips and burrows into his chest.

Jaehwan sighs in mild irritation. "You leave me with no choice," he says solemnly rolling on top of Sewoon. He clutches Sewoons face in his hands and leans in close, squishing his cheeks together with much more force than needed. Sewoon gives him an 'are-you-kidding-me" look to the best of his abilities.

"YOU NEVER KNOW, DEAR, HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU," Jaehwan screams in Sewoon's face and he immediately wakes up and grabs a pillow, pinning Jaehwan to the bed. He smothers Jaehwan's face with the pillow and the song dies in Jaehwan's throat as it's replaced with chuckles.

"You clearly hate me," Sewoon voice filters through the bathroom door, slightly muffled. "You don't have a heart if you can wake me up like that."

"Of course I don't," replies Jaehwan from his spread-eagled position on the rumpled sheets, "You've already stolen mine."

❤️ +1

It's already 10pm and Sewoon still isn't home. Jaehwan stares at the cold food on the table and decides to venture out to look for him. Usually, Sewoon is home by 9, but today, he did warn he'd be at least half an hour late due to the pouring rain outside.

He grabs an umbrella as he leaves, pulling his coat around his pyjamas as he walks out into the rain.

Sewoon is right there, across the road, waving happily at him underneath his own umbrella. Jaehwan notes that it's the one that he got him for their fifth anniversary. He picks up his pace as he crosses the road, eyes fixated on Sewoon.

"I missed you!" He shouts happily, feet moving on their own accord. Sewoon throws his head back and laughs freely. It's music to his ears.

Then, everything that could go wrong, went wrong.

He remembers seeing Sewoon's expression turn from relaxed to panicked, he hears the screech of tires against the asphalt, a warm body slamming into him as his umbrella falls from his grasp and the rain pours down onto him, soaking him completely.

He lies there on his back for a few minutes, before the adrenaline dies and his senses return to him.

Jaehwan's heart plummets.

Sewoon lies in a swiftly growing puddle of blood, twitching ever so slightly. The night turns sour as Jaehwan skids to a halt by Sewoon's side, dropping to his knees beside his motionless body. He pulls out his phone shakily, calling for an ambulance. "Hello? There's been an a-accident- yes, Street 34, right beside Gangnam Mall- please hurry! There's someone really injured-"

A tug on his shirt sleeve causes him to look directly into Sewoon's calm eyes. "Hey," he says weakly, before he dissolves into coughs. Blood stains his lips. "Don't worry, I'll be fine."

"You just got hit by a car, you brat! How could you sacrifice yourself for me?" Unshed tears brim in Jaehwan's eyes.

Sewoon smiles a watery smile and strokes Jaehwan's cheek. It leaves behind a bloody trail but they both pretend not to notice it. "Hyung, you're okay, so I'm okay." There's a distant look in Sewoon's eyes and Jaehwan begins to worry.

"Sewoonie, stay with me, the ambulance will be here soon, please just stay with me-"

Sewoon's eyes refocus on Jaehwan. "Hyung, I want to sing for you." Jaehwan still looks uncertain. "Hyung, I might not make it. Let me sing for you."

"Don't say it like that, Sewoonie, you'll make it. Hyung believes in you. Stay with me." Jaehwan grasps his hand and puts his ear next to Sewoon's lips. "Hyung is listening."

"So please don't take my sunshine-" Sewoon coughs up blood all over Jaehwan's shirt and uses his last bit of strength to turn his head and plant a final, lingering kiss on Jaehwan's lips. Jaehwan kisses back with a ferocity he had never had before. A few heartbeats pass and they separate, Sewoon sleepily smiling up at Jaehwan. His eyelids slip shut and the final breath slips past his lips.

Sewoon is gone.

Jaehwan's heart shatters.

"No!" He howls, the tears flowing down his cheeks. "Jung Sewoon, you can't do this to me- Sewoon-ah, Jung Sewoon!" The rain drenches him from head to toe, it's cold, but he pays it no heed. He clutches at his heart. "Hyung hasn't finished his song for you, Sewoon, hyung hasn't finished singing!" Jaehwan rocks back and forth in grief, holding Sewoon's cold and lifeless body in his arms. "Please don't go..."

The ambulance arrives moments too late. He is herded into the ambulance as Sewoon is carefully placed in a body bag. "Honey, does it hurt anywhere?" The nurse enquires, wrapping a warm fluffy towel around Jaehwan. He trembles with cold and welcomes the warmth that serves as painful reminder of the winters he'd spent cuddled with Sewoon together in front of the TV, throwing popcorn at each other and holding cups of hot chocolate in their hands, ignoring the movies playing on the TV. 

Jaehwan stares blankly ahead. He pats his chest with a hand as the tears finally fall, mixing with the rainwater dripping from his hair down his face. "It hurts," he sobs, "It hurts everywhere." He cries harder, remembering Sewoon singing their song to him at his final moments, trying to comfort him. "It hurts everywhere, especially here." He points to his heart. "M-make it stop, please. Make it stop."

It hurts because he's not here, Jaehwan wants to tell her, he's not here because of me. Make him come back to me. Help me get him back.

He knows that the nurse is powerless. The doctor tells him later in the week that he'll get over it soon, that time heals all wounds.

10 years later, and Jaehwan's heart still aches painfully for Sewoon. He places the fresh flowers down on Sewoon’s grave and tears up again. “Today would have been our 12th anniversary, Sewoonie. Today, the radio played our song and I had to turn it off, b-because I couldn’t-” His voice breaks off and Jaehwan ducks his head, tears dripping down his face, reminiscent of the fateful night years ago where he’d held Sewoon in his arms for the last time. He would give anything just to hold Sewoon in his arms again, to feel the puff of his breath, warm and comforting aginst his neck. “Why did you have to leave me? Why couldn’t it have been me instead?”  He scrubs at his eyes hopelessly. “It hurts without you here, please, please, come back.”