Saruman Touts for Tories!
After a media furore over Hobbit Martin Freeman’s support of the Labour party, wizard, despot and beard-haver Saruman has been equally vocal about his support for the Tories, making a number of passionate speeches about economic stability from his literal ivory tower.
“It makes total sense,” Saruman commented when interviewed. “I essentially believe in authoritarian control, mass industrialisation and a hostile approach toward anyone not in my post code. I’m also a fan of exploiting the ignorance and resentment of the disenfranchised masses to enforce my will. In my world we call them Orcs, I believe that in your world they are referred to as the working classes.”
When asked why instead Saruman didn’t align with the more obvious UKIP, the wizard shook his head in dismay. “Do I look like a tosser?”
Village Fate contacted the Hobbit for a statement, only to be told by representatives that Martin Freeman is not actually a Hobbit but only an actor that plays one. Investigations continue.
