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person a who gets objectively traumatic fever dreams about their dark and mysterious past x person b who gets the stupidest fever dreams about their deep-seated fear of having peanut butter stuck to the roof of their mouth. or something. bonus points if they get sick at the same time and b is much more outwardly shaken by their visions than a
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sick ppl whose attempts at abating their symptoms backfire in ballistic fashion. inconspicuous throat clearing that turns a teasing tickle into an intolerable itch, one which refuses to be relieved by anything but wretched, wrenching hacking. subtle temple rubbing that turns underlying tension into an aching, throbbing memo re: how sensitive their skin gets with a fever. light, liquid sniffles that turn a steady stream of irritation into a dam-bursting barrage of soaking sneezes. maybe they’re in denial about being sick or maybe they hate drawing attention to themselves or maybe it’s a mix of both. either way they’re not recovering without several more reminders that they are Weak and Vulnerable and About to Make An Embarrassing Noise. perhaps even several
i see your person gets hit hard with head cold right before important valentine’s day date and goes to great lengths to hide it
i raise you person gets hit hard with head cold right before important valentine’s day date and takes so much medication they pass out and wake up hours later to a doozy of a headache, a dozen voicemail messages, and the horrific realisation that they’ve slept in past said date
also like what if we made them kiss
“ESSCCHhuh!”
“bless you :(“
“snf. thadks.”
“...oh mby god, stop lookig at mbe like that.”
“like what :(“
“it was one sdeeze.”
“well, yeah, that’s why i blessed you :( do you think i can’t count now :(“
“heh… hERSSCHHugh!”
“that was two sneezes :(“
“ugh, fide, you wadt mbe to go to bed?”
“i’ve already fluffed the pillows :)”
pompous theatre diva who comes down with the sneeziest cold and a horrible sore throat right before opening night x their understudy who's been treated as their unofficial personal assistant all this time + is now torn between celebrating this opportunity and checking up on a certain someone who doesn't want to come out of their dressing room
(the understudy comes around to the latter option by intermission, probably. #lovewins)
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i know that we all know and love the character who's in total denial about being sick and is horrible at communicating their needs but recently i've really been enjoying the idea of an egotistical piece of work who thinks they couldn't be more clear about their 1) being sick 2) needing to be paid attention to (bc they're sick, obviously, but also bc that's just always been at the bottom of their hierarchy of needs) proceeding to not get any of that attention (specifically bc of their horrible communication) and then getting pissed about it in the most pathetic way possible. idk it's 1am and i want toxic yuri sickfic. you can read this scenario however you want However in a few minutes it'll be 2am and i'll still want toxic yuri sickfic. guess what i'll want at 3am
like ok they're lagging behind on a walk outdoors with their partner. sniffling a little. rubbing their arms in a sort of loose self-hug. they mutter something about feeling kinda chilly. for such a personal confession of weakness they expect to win their partner's total sympathy. you know a hand on their forehead a spoon of soup in their mouth a thousand-ply tissue held tenderly to their runny nose. the whole package. they are then hit with a characteristically playful "maybe u should've remembered to wear a jacket then dummy :p" from their partner and spend the rest of the walk sulking and giving the snippiest cryptic-est answers about whether they're okay to keep walking ("don't worry i wasn't stupid enough to forget about wearing shoes 🙄") and stuff like that. later on when they're confronted about the sudden assholery they cite their sore throat and sinus headache as an excuse for their behaviour and their partner goes ??? why didn't you tell me earlier we could've bought some medicine at the corner store and they go well i DID tell you and you LAUGHED about it and their partner just keeps going ??? at this alternate reality they've created where clearing their throat every few minutes when their other body language screams i-don't-walk-to-talk-right-now type annoyance is universally understood code for I Must Be Tucked In Bed At Once Lest I Succumb To This Wretched Fever and one (1) passing mention of being cold = A Degree Of Vulnerability Which Entitles Me To Your Devotion
someone going to bed cuddled up with their poor sick partner, poised to spend the next day making them feel as better as possible. obviously they wake up with a concrete head and a cascading nose and their dreams of playing nursemaid utterly dashed. and you bet they’re sooo upset with themselves they had a whole meal plan plotted out and a new set of colour-coded calendar reminders for medicine taking times and fresh tissue packs placed in every room. meanwhile their partner is like you do know your temperature is point one degrees above average. are you trying to cry yourself into a fever dumbfuck (said with heartwrenching concern)
thinking about someone with a cold aching for attention from Their Someone. tragically Their Someone is somewhere in a dismally distant land (i.e. work) and their fragile body is in no condition to brave any element not present in nasal spray, much less navigate such dangerous terrain by their lonesome in a clanking death trap of a metal can (i.e. drive to work). the most reasonable course of action, of course, is to send a few thousand frowny faces with variable quantities of parentheses with about one mote of context. asking for more tissues or the thermometer’s location is gauche. unromantic. no they’re pretty sure DYING :( and OB DEATHS DOUR :((( and SNDDED ON UR JCKE :((((( will bring in the big bucks (of sympathy) (or make them bankrupt bc they’re going to give Their Someone a heart attack)
