obito who somehow survives actually and makes it back to the right dimension. he immediately finds kakashi and kakashi goes bugged eyed and silent because no way his teammate died and came back to life a second time. but he's really real and this time he's not going to commit insane war crimes for the sake of infinite delusion. kakashi who's about to become hokage and knows obito needs to face justice but he's a little warped now AND he's hokage so he hides obito until he can freely pardon people.
people start to get suspicious because the next in line for the hat is suddenly acting really shifty.... he's usually pretty quiet but now his neighbors are making noise complaints every other day. they hear muffled yelling, a lot of crashes and bangs, and strangely, their walls start shaking almost every night...
word spreads fast and soon the rumors start. oh he just got a new puppy to train, that's all...
he's remodeling and the remodeling company is giving him a hard time....
he's practicing new jutsu...
those are the innocent theories but of course, no one loves drama and horror quite like a shinobi and soon enough, genma and the rest of the surviving jounin of that era are taking bets.
kakashi is actually a secret serial killer and is torturing his victims openly and since he's about to be hokage, he's about to make murder legal
he's taking part in weird masochistic rituals to safeguard konoha
he's a follower of jashin now, hidan has been talking to him in his dreams
he's a witch
all of these start spreading around until the konoha 11 get their hands on it and they, in all their infinite nonsense and skill, actually try to figure out what the hell kakashi-sensei is doing at night and why he's being so weird and offputting—more so than usual, that is.
sakura and naruto make a silent pact. they know kakashi better than anyone, if anyone can figure it out, they can. and boy do they. they catch a glimpse of obito one night and both of them, jaws dropped and fuming, march right up to kakashi apartment door and start BANGING because what do you mean KAKASHI'S war criminal boyfriend gets to walk free and THEIRS doesn't... quite frankly, it's disgusting and they will get retribution.
kakashi answers and of course tries to brush them off but they are having none of it. not while sasuke is rotting away in a cell, docile as a lamb. sakura bodily moves kakashi out of the way so they can search his apartment. "you're not going to find anything," kakashi insists. he sounds urgent and frantic. because he's hiding something.
"oh we know he's not here," sakura acknowledges, tapping the corner of her eye with a vicious sneer. "but you can't hide traces of him."
they search and search but they only find circumstantial evidence. until naruto catches a hand, it's groping around the kitchen table for something. kakashi sees it coming. he sees obito's glasses on the counter and he wishes he could enter kamui and hit him over the head. instead, he can only watch as naruto silently gets closer until he snags the hand and yanks, demanding the bastard leave his little hidey hole.
obito comes tumbling out, crashing to the ground in a pathetic heap. kakashi lets his head drop and soon, the cacophony of complaints and demands start up from the peanut gallery that his students make up. when they finally die down and wait for an explanation, all kakashi can do is promise them he will immediately pardon sasuke.
sakura and naruto pause and watch obito who's looking at the floor with a grimace, a hand loosely holding onto kakashi's jounin shirt. with twin groans, they collapse to the floor and relent. fine, they'll keep kakashi's secret but he has to pardon sasuke IMMEDIATELY even if it means he loses the hokage title.
"done."
kakashi has no qualms. he's almost hoping it gets him to lose the hat.
