#hi6edit

dumping this here in case the subtitles were too tricky to follow please watch the actual video (18:21) with sound on and all it takes me out all the damn time

[1] Cheng Yi’s cards: Ultraman who went on a blind date and got stung by a bee and got sausage lips Cai Wenjing: (in terrible Cantonese accent) A man and a woman - what do their parents arrange for them to do together?

[2] CY: processing CWJ: When two people meet for the first time, a man and a woman He Jiong the host: already dying

[3] CY: still processing CWJ: If they get together, they are lovers HJ: still dying

[4] CY: (itCa) Sei… Sei… Sei… CWJ: anticipation CY: (itCa) How many characters are there?

[5] CWJ: (itCa) Two characters! CY: (itCa) Lovers. CWJ: (itCa) The step they have to take before becoming lovers

[6] CY: (itCa and with absolute fucking confidence) Friends! CWJ: literally hanging on by a thread at this point (itCa) They started as friends HJ: (in Mandarin) A verb. They go to a place to do what?

[7] CY: PROCESSING aha! (itCa and still with absolute fucking confidence) A park! CWJ: (itCa) Ok let’s not talk about that anymore HJ: cackling in absolute sadistic glee CWJ: (itCa) There’s a small kind of animal in the garden

[8] CWJ: (itCa) Like that. It’s a… Its body is like what you’re wearing. It’s yellow. Yellow, black, black, and it has a pair of wings

[9] CY: got it! (itCa and with the most fucking confidence known to mankind) Cow! (lit: yellow cow) CWJ: (itCa) There’s a tiny bug CY: still processing (itCa) Little yellow bug

[10] HJ: spits CWJ: (itCa) Not a little yellow bug. There’s a bug that might sting you and you will swell up CY: (itCa) Bee! HJ: (iM) That’s right! There’s progress, friends! “Bee.” There’s progress!

[11] Tan Jianci: completely enjoying this circus CY: secretly pleased CWJ: (itCa) Then what will the bee do to you? CY: (itCa) Sting me HJ: (iM) Ah that’s right, that’s right, that’s right

[12] CWJ: (itCa) It stings your mouth–oh no, no! Game rule: can’t say the character that appears on the card CWJ: (itCa) This area will… ooOOOOOoooo Show effects: kissing sounds CY: (itCa) A bee stings my mouth du du du

[13] TJC: having the absolute fucking time of his life HJ: (iM) Yes, yes, yes, what do you call lips that go “du du du”? CY: (itCa) Du du lips. Bee du du lips

[14] CY: rapid fire beings (itCa) Bee sausage. Bun! I think I got it (itCa) Bee sausage ah! Oh! A bee stings the lips of a sausage?

[15] HJ: what the fuck is going on CWJ: what the fuck is going on x2 (itCa) Bee… gives up TJC: (iM) The lips of a sausage?!

[16] HJ: (iM) Your lips, your lips CY: (itCa) Oh! A bee stings the lips of a sausage and causes me to have du du lips? CWJ: K.O.

[17] Wang Hedi: losing his shit CWJ: (itCa) Then you will look very sexy lor! CY: embarrassed send help

[18] CY: (itCa) It’s too difficult, let’s change to another one CWJ: (itCa) We’ll guess this (card in his left hand). This is easy to guess. Pew pew pew! Pew pew pew! CY: (itCa) Ultraman! HJ: (iM) That’s right! Good!

[19] HJ: (iM) Now we’re just missing a verb. The verb in the front CWJ: (itCa) Just missing a word. Your daddy and mummy tell you to go and meet a girl today. With me… what do you call this action?

[20] CY: (itCa) Ultraman’s action? CWJ: (itCa) Not Ultraman!!!!!! HJ: dies in background CWJ: (itCa) Nothing to do with Ultraman anymore!!!!!! Yang Di: Aaahhhhhhh!!!!!! WHD: SHOOK

[21] TJC: (iM) Oh my god! I can watch a whole season of them playing this! CY: god save me CWJ: (itCa) There’s no more Ultraman now!

[22] TJC: can’t even sit in his fucking seat anymore CWJ: (itCa) Now it’s me and you. Then Daddy and Mummy tell me you are a handsome boy, that you are going to be my boyfriend CY: (itCa) Date? HJ: (iM) Before a date

[23] HJ: (iM) The first date CY: (itCa) Strangers? eyes sparkling with hope HJ: (iM) AhhHH yes–yes… The two strangers go to the park for a first date that was arrange by their parents. That’s called… CWJ: anticipation TJC: does he finally get it

[24] Show effects: tense piano music CY: (itCa and once more with ABSOLUTE fucking confidence) Park. HJ: K.O. of the century

[25] HJ: (iM) Can we get Cheng Yi to be a regular? Just to play this CY: SHY TJC: in proper Cantonese The second word is… Show effects: kissing sounds

[26] CY: (itCa) Kissing ah? They’re meeting for the first time and they’re already kissing ah? TJC, WHD: ABSOLUTELY FUCKING GONE HJ: choking goose INTENSIFIES