#hhhghgh

“I...I,” His voice croaked and faltered for a second. Rurik inhaled and tried to calm himself before returning to his more usual monotonous tone, though still a bit shaky, “I don’t like you. I don’t want to like you. You’ve managed to worm your way into my head with your damn manipulation and your mocking, saccharine words of desire. I despise you. Which is exactly what you want, I suppose.”

Rurik’s face was crinkled, almost into a pained look, as he stared down at the floor. The silence weighed everything in the room down, almost as if Dante was casting one of his gravity spells. He was right, normally Rurik’s hatred and disdain for him entertained him immensely. This time, however… This time, the words of contempt felt sour and heavy instead of spurring him on like usual.

“Quite hypocritical for you to accuse me of lying and then go on like this.” Dante’s voice cut through the silence and caused Rurik to wince again. Though his words were sharp, Dante scooted a bit closer to Rurik and gently placed a hand on top of his clenched fist. “If you really hated me it would be a lot more fun, but your words lack the bite they usually have. You don’t seem mad at me this time, so what are you mad about?”

The guard’s eyes opened just enough to glare down at the hand that was now on top of his and lightly stroking his strained knuckles. His eyes stayed fixed on the hand, not moving an inch or betraying any semblance of emotion behind them. His mannerisms spoke for him though, or rather, his lack thereof. Normally he would have very quickly pulled his hand away at Dante’s touch, or even attacked him, but it seemed Rurik was truly full of surprises today. He sat there, silent and unmoving, as if suddenly turned into a cold slab of stone.

Perhaps it was pushing his luck, but Dante took the opportunity to snake his arm around the taller man’s shoulders and bring him closer. He was expecting to be shoved away, even sort of hoping for it, so he knew Rurik wasn’t broken or something. Instead, Rurik’s eyes squeezed shut again as he allowed himself to be pulled closer and his head to be rested on his King’s shoulder. Countless times Dante had told Rurik that he would crack his icy exterior one day, but this certainly wasn’t what he was expecting, nor was it what he wanted. There was no fun in this silent resignation, there had to be more.

After a moment of consideration Dante decided to prod a little; to try to get something out of him. 

“You’ve never been shy with your words before, so why don’t you say what you really want to say. The head of Spade’s guard, my guard, shouldn’t be a coward who can’t speak his mind.”

Rurik’s lip twitched in annoyance at the comment, but he didn’t move from his position. A few seconds of dead silence passed before a drawn out sigh came from the guard. 

“I… Never particularly cared to stay alive. When you gave me the ultimatum to serve as your guard or die, I was more than happy to pick the latter. But I...” Rurik’s words trailed off a bit as he considered carefully what to say, “I was spurred on by a moment of selfish desire to accept your offer. I wanted to destroy, to bring ruin to the world that scorned me, I wanted… something else… Something that I didn’t understand or care to acknowledge, something I still don’t fully understand or want to acknowledge.”

“Oh?” Dante couldn’t hide the mischievous tone in his voice. It seemed like he would finally get something interesting from the stoic man. “Go on.”

A light growl came from Rurik at the mocking tone of Dante’s voice. He sat in silence once more, no longer wanting to continue, not wanting to give Dante the satisfaction of his words leading to the only place they could go from here. But perhaps he was right, the captain of the guard shouldn’t be afraid to say what was on his mind, what had been on his mind for a while now.

“I guess another thing I so selfishly wanted was… the attention you’ve been giving me… You’re an absolute menace and you give me an almost constant headache with your egotism and insufferable attitude and stupid beard and--”

“Alright alright, get back on topic will you.” Dante interjected before Rurik veered off into jeering him for the rest of the night.

Rurik snarled and cleared his throat before continuing his train of thought. “Despite your distasteful being and my better judgement I suppose… I’ve come to… not completely despise your presence in my life… Perhaps I even… I-I…I want...”

Rurik’s voice became an incomprehensible jumble of whispers and stuttered words as he tried to force his thoughts to come out, but everything he wanted to say kept getting stuck in his throat. He brought a hand up to his face and squeezed his temples to try to steady his mind in any way he could. He felt pathetic, and he knew Dante was thinking the same thing. 

“You want...?” The tone was curious, and mocking as always, as Dante tilted Rurik’s head so he was facing him. “Tell me what it is you want, Rurik.”

A chill shot up Rurik’s spine at the use of his name. Similarly to how he usually never used Dante’s, Dante rarely used his name, and preferred all sorts of condescending pet names instead.

“I want...I… You… I want you t-to…” Rurik’s grip on his own face tightened in frustration. It shouldn’t be this hard to say something so simple, but he just couldn’t get the words to come out. "I… I can’t… say it,” A loud sigh escaped the man. He couldn’t get out what he wanted exactly, but maybe he could force something easier to come out.

“C-could... could you just hold me, a while?"

Rurik’s eyes were once again cast down onto the floor, awaiting the laughter and mockery he was sure was going to come from the devil host. But it didn’t quite come. There was a small chuckle from Dante, but it seemed more relieved than mocking. Rurik didn’t want to look up, but he felt the other man slide back, further onto the bed, and away from him. It was maddening how he felt his heart sink a bit as Dante’s arm left his shoulders and his presence got slightly further away. What an absolutely dreadful feeling to miss his touch. It didn’t last long, however. Rurik’s eyes shifted a bit as Dante’s boots plopped down on the floor beside him, and soon after he felt a tug on one of his arms, beckoning him back. He complied with the force, allowing himself to be pulled back into the middle of his own rather large bed. 

Rurik finally brought his gaze back up and saw Dante had already laid down and made himself comfortable, one arm arm up and resting behind his head. The King was flexing his fingers in a “come here” motion while using the slightest bit of his gravity magic to pull Rurik towards him. It was an aggravating sight, but something about it made Rurik’s stomach churn and flutter as well. He very cautiously slid himself over to Dante and slowly lowered his head onto his chest, and even more slowly wrapped an arm over his waist. Dante’s free hand curled into Rurik’s soft, fluffy hair and twirled around a few locks. All hesitation lifted and Rurik curled up into a tight ball next to Dante, hiding his red face from his sight.