#hhg2a

Much like the other titan-forged folk encountered in many places across Azeroth, the Earthen of Khaz Algar are creations of the Titan Keepers formed from living stone. However, unlike other creations of the Keepers, the story of these earthen has taken quite a different series of turns!

Stepping off the boat onto the Waking Shores, it is immediately apparently that the elements thrive here in their most primal state. Lava, water, wind... it's all here and very much alive! (This is quite literal in some cases, do watch out for the lava elementals that are near the Wingrest Embassy or you'll be needing a healer or a bin for ashes.) The land is alive in more than just the elements too, as the plant life and creatures are also very active, especially the numerous dragons that inhabit the Shores!

An ancient race of humanoid dragonkin, the dracthyr are gifted with the power to wield the magics of the five primary dragonflights as evokers. Like their true dragon brethren, they also can take on a humanoid visage in lieu of their draconic form.

As their origins are still being fully explained and understood by experts and regular folks alike, the Dracthyr have traveled to the lands of the Alliance and Horde to learn of the world in this age.

While they have much to learn from us, I fervently believe we have quite a lot to learn from them as well!

* STATIC *

“Um, yes. Hello? Is this thing functioning?”

< loud mechanical squawking noises erupt in the background > 

“Okay, okay. I get it, Quark. It’s working... Ah, hello readers, explorers, hitchhikers, and so on! Just wanted to send word that I am, in fact, NOT dead. Instead, I’m quite alive and kicking, as the saying goes...” < an irritated mechanical squawk interrupts the speaker >  “Oh right. Quark is also alive and kicking... as much as a mechano-rooster is really livi- OUCH!.”

< a heavy sigh comes across the radio>

“Yes, Quark is alive.”

“I have, however, been in the afterlife, the Shadowlands to be precise, for the past year and a half. To say it’s been interesting would be understatement of the highest order of magnitude...”

*MORE STATIC *

< speaking loudly over the rising static noise >

“Ah, seems the connection is still a bit out of sorts! Ah well, I’ll return soon with a bundle of new entries for the Guide!

Found under the Stormwind City's station of the Deeprun Tram, the enterprising gnome Bizmo runs his Brawlpub, where groups of battle-hungry fighters have gathered creatures from all over Azeroth, Outland and beyond to participate in bloody arena deathmatches with heroes of the Alliance!

- A small blurb found on the reverse of this flyer

While the running joke of the number one rule of the Brawlpub is you don’t talk about the Brawlpub, the pitched battles that take place beneath the Stormwind station of the Deeprun Tram are widely known and often participated in to the great delight (and sometimes drunken anger) of a myriad of spectators. Featuring fighters from all over the known world and beyond, many an Alliance hero have tested their mettle against foes such as Bruce the Crocolisk, Grampa Grumplefoot, THE DOOMFLIPPER, one Bill the Janitor, and the legendary Epicus Maximus! For those who would like to just watch and not partake, the Guide cautions that sometimes spectators can get quite rowdy... and start fights of their own in the stands. So do be careful and watch for flying bottles or bits of unidentifiable food.

On that note, the bar is quite well stocked and it’s barkeep quite the mixologist. For those who want a drink with a kick, I definitely suggest a Banana Cocktail made by Barkeep Townsley.

So, if you happen to be taking the tram to or from Stormwind, I daresay it’s a stop you might want to make! - Assistant Editors Note:  BZZZZT. Blingtron 3000 owes me 50 gold and three cogwheels! 

A Note from the Editor:

Ah! Apologies for the long bit of silence, dear readers!

Been on a bit of an adventure. More to come on that but do enjoy some of these postcards I managed to snag during my travels of late!

- Osbern PS: Bzzz-caw-caaaaw!

While many of the Elite Tauren Chieftans (ETC) and their powerful songs, the Forsaken-based musical act known as Blight Boar has become another hit favorite with those who attend the Darkmoon Faire.

The band’s four member ensemble is made up of: - Devyln Styx (Vocals) - Jon Graves (Lead Guitar) - Cage Head (Bassist) - Fiddlesticks (Drummer)

Referred to as ‘death metal’ by the band members and its manager, Jay Maguire, the band performs regularly in the aptly named ‘Cauldron of Rock’ to the east of the main fairgrounds. Die-hard fans who attend the performances are quite the enthusiastic (and possibly slightly rabid) bunch, referring to themselves as ‘blightheads.’

The band’s songs on the whole are simple. They generally follow the familiar theme of boy meets girl, the two fall in love, inexplicably die and are later resurrected by some malign villain for reasons never adequately explained. 

When asked about the band and it’s performances, manager & producer Jay Maguire stated:

“This is the illest, realest, deadest band you’ll ever see! They will melt your face off, figuratively and literally! Uh, speaking of, don’t forget to sign that waiver there...But yeah, before I met these guys, I was alive and had all my skin! Now I’m dead AND filthy rich!”

Editor’s Note: The said waiver forms were in fact liability waivers that absolved the band, Maguire and the Faire from any and all injuries, maladies, and/or unfortunate means of demise that might occur at a Blight Boar concert.

On the subject of the band’s earnings from their shows, Maguire noted that the band’s fabulous wealth had pushed the boundaries of goblin economic theory. Furthermore, in recognition of his work in the fields of economics and engineering, the band’s goblin accountant has recently been appointed as an archmage and lecturer for the Kirin Tor due to his arcano-engineered marvel, The Arithmo-tron (a rather ingenious device which allows the band’s finances to be accurately managed by using temporal magics to keep a team of goblin bean counters in a suspended point in time.)

An amended, but still abbreviated list compiled by Archmage Brom Kershner, Master Librarian, and Dr. Gelwyn von Doomshmirtz of the Kirin Tor for the readers of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Azeroth.

The following list is divided into nonfiction, fiction, and dramatic works:

NONFICTION

Well, That About Wraps It Up For The Titans by High Explorer M. Magellas

Is It a Rock? How to Correctly Identify Ancient Relics by Elise Starseeker, with foreword by Sir Finley Mrrgglton

You Call THIS Archaeology? A Tale of Exploits in Uldum by Dr. Harrison Jones

The Second War, A Six Volume History by Cyrus Crestfall

FICTION

The Great Gallywix by F. Scott Fitzwrench

The Telaari Grapes of Wrath by John Shelby, Gryphon Master

A Tale of Two Undercities by Deathstalker Aleric Hawkins

Of Mogu and Men by Lorewalker Stonestep

Our Man in Freehold by Flynn Fairwind

The Count of Tol Barad by Averold Duran

The Old Gnome and the Sea by Ernie Hummingwire

The Strange Case of Dr. Tobias & Mr. Stalvan by J. Derrington

The Moon Also Rises by Jarod Shadowsong

The Metamorphosis by Kayn S. of the Illidari

All Quiet on the Warfront by Captain Tobias Zaren

The Brothers Krastinov by L. Polkelt

The Island of Doctor Weavil by G.M. Weldwell

The Murders in the Upton Borough by Lady Victoria Snyder

Around Azeroth in 42.6 Days by Rizzo Daggervolt

DRAMA

King Llane by Bill Spearshaker