Amarei Maurelle:

“Welcome to Physics!” *huge explosion* *screaming* “HOLY MOTHER-”

Aziza Septa:

*holding stethoscope to wall* “Just, uh, listening to see if I can hear myself asking for your opinion...I can’t, no, I don’t hear...”

Minerva Saturnius:

*slices water bottles with sword* “Jesus Christ, it’s Jason Bourne.”

Helvedur:

“I LOVE JESUS, DAMMIT. That’s why I go to church on Sundays~”

Kintyra Septim:

“Hi, today I’m going to be doing Breathe Me by Sia.” *plays piano* *death metal screams* “BE MY FRIEEEND”

Fenthari Mahariel:

“‘Road work ahead’? Uhh, yeah! I sure hope it does!”

Garrett Hawke:

“I keep telling you man, you gotta stop letting people walk all over you!” *wheezes as he’s being stepped on* “Okay...”

Javier Almeda:

“This is CNN Breaking News.” *SMASH*

Montserrat Almeda:

*playing over the Seinfeld theme*  I’ve become so numb I can’t feel you there

Jasmine Clayton:

“If there are any spirits here tonight, tell me...does this sound like Shakira? Le ro lo le lo le...”

Ursula Trevelyan:

“Thank you all for coming to my Easter dinner, I just wanted to say ‘ass and tiddies.’”

Siri Brosca:

Fresh paint job? CHECK Fresh inside? CHECK Is the outside frame in the trunk wide? YES Are the rims big? WHUT?

Martin Gaius Septa:

La la la la La la la la Elmo’s wor-Hello darkness my old friend

Edrik:

"Honey, you’ve got a big storm coming.”

Taliah Kuvaris:

“You should get the orange soda. It’s amazing!” “Okay...I’ll have the strawberry soda.” *dramatic stare*

Visenya:

ami and helvy are no fun

before you go go: kintyra, siri, helvedur, visenya

when september ends: guy, garrett, fenthari, jasmine

My Oblivigang, which grows to include Dion’s dead ass. I debated putting Martin in his spot but saw the wink and decided Dion belonged there with his baby cousin.

Hilde: Don't tell me you're trying to hear "Jesus is love" again.

Helvedur: Yes.

Hilde: Are you lying to me?