#hdtpe

Leave me the fuck alone. Stop harassing me. Stop demanding I give you evidence of my abuse. I have kept his identity a secret for many reasons. A lot of it happened in voice call and my abuser openly admitted to several people that he abused me "but we worked it out and Roy forgave me!!!"

No. I am his abuse victim and he does not decide for me whether I forgive him for it or not. I can decide I am actually not okay with any of it and it deeply traumatized me, actually. I am allowed to do that. He has no say over any of that. I do not forgive him. He abused me and he admitted to it in a public voice call. Several times.

He already almost killed me in 2019. You do not need to finish the job for him in 2026.

"Gender Critical is a d o g w h i s t l e 👁👄👁" they state confidentiality, freshly stepping out of a time machine that brought them from 2015 to the present day.

This is so incredibly funny and probably the most “how dare you say we piss on the poor” level of reading comprehension I’ve ever seen

If you wanna be pissy about an autistic person VERY PRIVATELY and only occasionally attempting to reclaim the r-slur, in an environment where I was actively and regularly being called "a retard" by multiple people I considered friends or found family on a daily basis, to try and cope with it so I wouldn't fucking snap and kill myself out of sheer self-hatred and genuinely believing I was nothing more than that slur, you should add screenshots of every single instance my abusive ex, his shitty white trash "fiance," his two sidepieces, and everyone else in that server who called me or others retarded on the regular and very frequently.

You love to leave out the fact that I was actively being abused, regularly had my intelligence insulted, and also called retarded by these people on a near-daily basis just for being autistic and disabled. Some of those screens you got from my abusive ex cropped out important details, such as very private vents where I was suicidal or having an active mental breakdown while bitterly calling myself the slur. Yet you have no evidence of me calling other people that elsewhere, because I never fucking did.

Every single one of those messages were extremely private and directly connected to my abuser. Keep in mind; I am officially diagnosed as mid-level autistic and have been for a very long time. This diagnosis is how I got on disability to begin with. My abuser was there for all of it. None of these people within that server (except for manchild ex) are diagnosed autistic or believe they are autistic.

My abuser, his "fiance," his sidepieces, and his friends regularly say the slur on an almost daily basis in both text and voice call. I know damn well they still say it daily to this very day. Why? I've known this disgustingly evil motherfucker for almost 11 years. Very intimately.

The day before I left that server I got an extremely malicious "we all know you're retarded [name]" from my abusive ex's newest sidepiece (that didn't last long and what resulted in everything exploding, bc said sidepiece COULD NOT keep his mouth shut), and I was repeatedly called a retard in-call multiple times by every single person in said call.

If I were still with my abuser and the rest of these assholes, they'd still be calling me retarded to my face (they call me that anyway even without me there and always have), yet you wanna focus on me calling myself retarded in THAT environment? To paint me as some evil ableist bigot that fakes being autistic or whatever just because I won't give you my fucking medical records?

Eat my entire ass you stupid fucking chud.

And the whole "not in contact with your abusers" thing still going, LMAOOO fuck off. You got screenshots directly from their server you dumbass fucking cunt. Caught red fucking handed with that one! The fuck are you doing in their server, hm? This is exactly why I never publicly shared my evidence of my abuse and what I went through with that disgusting monster (not only that, but because you intentionally tried to sabotage me filing a restraining order if I needed to by trying to goad me into posting said evidence).

You also admit in your own stupid callout that you personally hate me and everyone else you added to that callout. You say you don't want me to deal with suicide or self-harm over this, but that's already happened, and you immediately threw it back in my face blaming me for being suicidal and self-harming specifically because you kept "I'm in contact with your abusers and erm ur the abuser actually" over my fucking head. Only to post nothing about that because you know you have nothing, and anything you did have you KNEW would be going on the restraining order.

What I want is for YOU to leave ME alone and shut the fuck up about me. I've told you countless times to LEAVE ME ALONE and stop talking about me. Notice how I never really said anything about you when you didn't say anything about me? Crazy right? It's almost as if I don't care about you and want you to GO THE FUCK AWAY!!!

THIS is what I almost fucking killed myself over? THIS is what I self-harmed over? Dear lord. If I knew it was going to be this fucking stupid I wouldn't have even bothered.

I am featured in the Google docky, lol.

And, well, it took me a moment or two for it to really click in my head but

Oh boy gents I finally figured out why they insisted this post:

Was fakeclaiming Eden--

You guys are not fucking ready for this level of psychic damage I--

Oh my fucking christ on the cross--

Eden, no. No I didn't know any of this. Because we don't fucking know each other. We've never spoken. Not once. Everything I've learned about you since this started was against my will.

That entire post was prompted by people talking in circles at each other about you faking being drunk on moldly grape juice and literally nothing else. I had a vague idea of what was going on just from Sheev and Britt yapping about it, which no shit I saw, they are my friends, and that's the extent of the fucking context I had.

All that harassment because I tried to be half way respectful that I was publically weighing in on a situation I had no involvement with, so I tried to keep it non-specific and keep names out of the post. Booboo I'm the fool for that one I guess.

I don't even know what fucking CCD is. I keep trying to Google it and all I'm getting is this:

Is that a fucking typo, or--?

And I know there's no fucking point to pointing out again that my post doesn't actually fucking make sense if you interpret it as me fakeclaiming you. Or that I literally said the fucking opposite to dissociation and psychosis being mutually exclusive. I know, I know. You can lead a tumblr user to a post, but you can't make them read. I get it-- it's a fool's errand, but like--

Seriously Eden if you are experiencing BOTH psychosis and dissociative episodes CHRONICALLY you need to talk to a specialist. Like fucking YESTERDAY bud. Unhinged you found a way to interpret this as me """"fakeclaiming"""" you and not genuine concern for your well-being but--

Did you think I just pulled this out of my fucking ass? I know this because when **I** was getting diagnosed with DID **I** had to be assessed for any signs of chronic psychosis to rule it out. And I know YOU have not been properly treated because this would not be new fucking information to you if you were.

Eden, listen to me. This is serious. If you believe you are chronically experiencing both, you NEED to be thoroughly assessed. That is a much more difficult situation to tease out the root cause/causes of your symptoms. And if you cannot tease out the root cause of your symptoms, you're shit out of luck learning how/getting the tools you need to manage them.

Chronic dissociative episodes + psychosis + depression could also indicate something WAY more fucking serious. Like something potentially being *physically* wrong with your brain. Babe that don't bode well. That's a combo you could easily get referred to a *neurologist* for. Probably not, let's fucking hope not, but something that needs to be checked.

You've surrounded yourself with fucking enablers who let you make any sort of absurd excuse for this nonesense and you're now telling me this is potentially dangerous to your health because--

im not saying they arent allowed to be uncomfortable with gore in fictional media, what im saying is that anon is lowkey kinda right that theyd try to armchair diagnose that anon for enjoying killing violent enemies in an apocalyptic wasteland game

Oh I agree. They already buddied buddied with my abuser, who block evaded me just to try and armchair diagnose me with histrionic personality disorder to my face out of sheer spite (aka the OG "crazy hysterical bitch" diagnosis), while calling me delusional and detached from reality, then simultaneously saying he doesn't believe I'm schizospec and there's no way I can have non-epileptic seizures... despite yknow... being directly told about it when it happened and sent pics of me in the hospital. lol. Same person wants to become a therapist/psychiatrist by the way. He's going to get several patients to kill themselves.

also can we bring it up more often that they compared a trafficking victim to a rat? i dont think ppl talk abt that enough. i hope that anon is okay

At this point I'm assuming every single accusation they've made is a confession that they're self-projecting onto us. And yeah that shit is FUCKED. Chee calling a trafficking victim a rat is beyond disgusting and revolting. None of these people give a fuck about victims or survivors. Calling survivors/victims "rats" because they directly told you that you weren't helping survivors/victims is so fucking vile. I hope that anon is okay as well.