#hankvinweek

Their first meeting and mission had been less than pleasant. Gavin had gotten into a fight with Hank. Caught the other android staring for 0.01 seconds longer than he deemed necessary.

“The fuck you lookin’ at, you old fuck?” he had bit out at him.

Hank replied the way he was programmed to.

“If anyone’s the ‘old fuck’ it’s you, model GV200.” The number itself a grim reminder of his age.

Gavin threw the first punch of course. He was threatened to be dismantled if he had done it again. He couldn’t read Hank’s expression after that.

Hank was the only one who understood him. Eventually, the two got closer. He would spot him in the breakroom making coffee for his human partner alongside him. It was hard not to notice the perpetually calculating eyes. Hank had apologized for his behavior and Gavin told him to stop being such a kiss ass that it was over with.

Things had gotten better after that. They would get the coffee for their partners at the same time and would often have conversations that exceeded more than small talk.

There was a rivalry of course, but nothing malicious, just something that resembled something akin to coworkers, or even friends. There were moments of deviancy that would glint in their eyes when it came to the rush of competing. They made each other feel alive.

Gavin would feel the creak of his artificial bones when chasing a perp. An old injury that never quite got fixed. A rattle deep in the metal of his bones as he chased anyone, sometimes it made him feel like he was falling apart.  Hank was much faster than he always be faster than he was. He was better with people. Closer with his partner. He didn’t know what it was inside him, but seeing Hank being better than him angered him. Not that he was succeeding at his function, but that if Gavin couldn’t keep up, he would be replaced, and he would never see Hank or his partner again. It left him feeling hallow inside. He didn’t like it. He wasn’t supposed to feel this way. Too deviant. Too human. 

Maybe it was better to not let Hank close. It was hard when the man was constantly with him. It started out by just not acknowledging him. He would make his partner’s coffee earlier than Hank did in order to avoid bumping into him. He knew Hank knew what he was doing, he could see the shine of sadness from behind those blue artificial eyes. Gavin tried not staring into them for long fear he would get lost in them. The guilt tugged more with each tactic used to push away with cruel words and bitter looks. 

Their partners had headed home for the day, their duties weighing heavily on their shoulders, desperately needing some rest. Now, they were alone, without their partners as a buffer. They didn't need to speak, but they had been so ingrained with human mannerism it was strange not to. The night would drag on with the occasional perp walking into the station with some beat cops as escorts. 

‘Meet me in the closet of the evidence locker in 5 minutes’ a message had been sent to Gavin at 1:05 A.M. It had surprised him to say the least.

Gavin flicked his eyes up from his terminal to look at Hank, whose eyes were still stuck on his screen. Gavin wondered what that was about, a blue arrow and 'SOFTWARE INSTABILITY' flickered in his peripheral vision with feelings that came attached to the message.

After a moment, Hank got up, without giving Gavin so much as a courteous glance and headed towards the evidence locker room. Gavin went back to staring at the now organized files on his terminal.

2 minutes and 15 seconds left until he was supposed to meet Hank in the evidence room locker. Gavin slowly started getting up, he could hear the creaking of the metal rods inside of his body, trying to ignore the feeling of insecurity he shouldn't be feeling. He shouldn't care. Once he was no longer useful, he would be disposed of and replaced, that's how it was supposed to be...Wasn't it?

People paid him little mind. Just another mindless machine off to do some boring tedious work that humans shouldn't bother themselves with. His mind went through approximately 420 multiple possibilities as to why Hank would want to see him in the evidence locker. Alone.

They had little privacy at the station, their charging stations were in full view as it was located in the middle of the station. Anything with a level of secrecy needed to be discussed in the closet of the evidence locker. Whatever it was, it must have been important. Another message of 'SOFTWARE INSTABILITY' appeared in the corner of his vision.

He sped up his pace as the timer counted down closer to the agreed time. He entered the evidence locker and quickly located the closet. He turned the knob and found Hank standing there in the middle of the room, the dim light making him seem older than his model should look. Gavin fully came in and made sure to lock the door behind him.

He crossed his arms over his chest, and his head cocked to the side, a human mannerism he had picked up that was now second nature.

"What's with the sudden super-secret meeting, old timer?" he bit out, a smirk tugs on the corner of his mouth at the name, ironically used since Gavin was older than he was by a year.

Hank's serious expression turn into one of a twinge of indifference, but his eyes shone with hurt. It made Gavin thirium pump stagger. He should really get that checked out, but his diagnostics check didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary. He shouldn’t be feeling this type of way over an expression for someone who should mean nothing to him.

"It's not something I can put into words." Hank rolls up his sleeve and removes the skin from his arm revealed pearly white plastic.

Gavin looks at the other man wearily. Hesitant, yet Hank comes in closer and Gavin follows suite. Hank takes hand into his, fingers interlacing with one another. His thorium pump staggers again.

All of Hank's memories, thoughts on work, Connor, Nines, people he's met and lastly...Gavin. Every piece of information about Hank. In turn, Hank now knew everything Gavin did. His face saddened.

“Is that why you’ve been like this? Because you think they’re going to dispose of you again?”

“Shut up this isn’t about me!” he had said defensively. 

“I wouldn’t let them. I wouldn’t let them take you.” he assured with a tone that he hadn’t heard in his voice before. 

“You couldn’t do a damn thing about it.”

Hank revealed something else to Gavin with another surge of information streaming into the older model. 

Gavin's eyes snapped open, his grip tightening instinctively, "You're a... deviant." he realizes he's holding Hank's hand with excessive force and loosens his grip. He doesn't want to let go.

"Yeah."

Gavin flipped through the memories again. Each one feeling everything Hank could. He could feel his hurt each time Gavin said something cruel. He could feel warmth each time he saw the corners of his mouth curl into a satisfied smirk. He would feel a deep pit of jealousy when he watched he own back walk away with Nines.

"Because of me?" Gavin tried to gather all the information.

All Hank can hear is crashing and shouting. Connor hadn't arrived yet, but Nines and Gavin were the first on the scene. Hank wasn't issued a gun, and was told to stay back, but he couldn't. Something was telling him to go. He did. Running up the stairs he hid behind a wall keeping an eye on the scene. Their perp with a gun pointed at Richard, Gavin standing a few feet away from him scanning the scene.

Hank couldn't do anything. He was too far to take the gun or even sacrifice himself. The man was speaking in loud bursts, angering himself as Nines tried to calm him down. It didn't work. The man raised the gun and squeezed his eyes shut along with pulling the trigger. Hank took this chance to tackle the man to the ground, hoping, yet knowing he was too late.

He turned to Nines expecting to see Gavin by his side aiding him. But all he saw was the once white wall splattered with blue.

Nines was crouched over his partner, the wires in his chest exposed as the bullet had shot clean through him hitting a main thirium tube. The floor had puddles of thirium, Gavin clasping onto Nines' hand, the man looking calm, but the facade clearly close to breaking. Hank saw the look they gave each other. Emotion. Their eyes were both full of emotion. Gavin had never looked at him like that before. He had never seen Detective Richard this frazzled about anything either. Something broke inside of him.

*^DEVIANT^*

"Step aside, Detective. We need to get him to a Cyberlife facility." with more hostility in his voice than

Richard looked up at him, his mask coming back into that of professional steel gaze, caught in his moment of vulnerability.

"Of course, no, I can take him, you stay with the perpetrator." Nines had directed.

"I think it best you do. I will transfer some of my own thirum to keep him activated enough to get to the Cyberlife facility." it was a lie, Gavin would be fine, Hank just wanted to be there for him.

"Whatever you think is best, I'll tell my brother when he gets here."

"Thank you, Detective."

Gavin replayed through memories, through the emotions. He couldn't understand them....but he felt them. He moved his free hand to cup Hank's cheek, the android's eyes widened at the sudden touch, his LED flickering yellow.  He had remembered that. He knew his partner had a 12% chance of living from such a wound. It was a risk he couldn’t take. They had also gotten off on a rough start but the two had become very real friend. Nines was his first friend. But just a friend. 

They peered into each other’s eyes just for the sake of just wanting to look at each other. Gavin couldn't take it anymore and pulled Hank into a kiss. Neither of them had done it before, they only had the knowledge they had from the internet and seeing it done in person.

It was awkward, and uncoordinated and perfect in every conceivable way.

They didn’t need air but felt the need to restrain themselves. Gavin’s lips were slightly puffy, and his cheeks tinted a light blue. Their skin of their hand’s still exposed in a shiny white plastic.

It was cold out, unusually so for April, enough that his jacket didn’t really seem like enough, especially now that the sun had gone down. It may have been colder, but the jack and coke running through him was deceptive and he was already tipsy enough to feel shut off from the space outside of himself and Hank.

He’d been told once that while alcohol made you feel warm, it didn’t actually change your body temperature. They’d done some kind of team building thing when he was at the academy, and given a list of 15 items, the team had to pick the three most likely to protect them in a blizzard with no shelter. Alcohol, as it turned out, was one of the worst choices. He thought it was ironic that, in a debate which relied on making good choices, alcohol had seemed like the correct answer.

That night, he knew just how poorly it affected decision making, especially when both men were under its grasp.

He hadn’t intended to kiss Hank. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to, because it would be a lie to say he hadn’t thought about Hank in ways that we’re far beyond professional. Gavin knew he had a thing that maybe was somewhere between hero worship and his self-proclaimed low standards. That, and the fact that he’d lost interest in going out just to get laid years ago. He was past the age for it anyway, and the only ones he was catching were practically teenagers looking for a top, and he sure as hell was not gonna do that. Knowing his luck, he’d be the one to pick up a damn minor and fuck his life twice over. Hank’s proximity was probably more of the idea than anything else, Gavin had figured.

That was, until they were shivering in the dark, puffs of air floating between them.

“Don’t be fucking stupid, you can’t drive, and I don’t drive.”

“You don’t drive? You’re a fucking cop.”

“Yeah, I have my license, but I don’t like driving. I don’t have a car.”

“Jesus, Reed, you’re 36 years old and you’re afraid of driving?”

“Fuck off, okay? Of all fucking people I’d think you would get it.”

There was a long pause, during which Gavin stared at his feet to hide his rising frustration. Hank wanted to take his car home, and Gavin wasn’t about to just let him.

“Ouch.”

“I wasn’t trying to be an asshole.” He babbled in defence.

“Seems like you don’t have to try.” Hank shrugged. Gavin didn’t answer. “How do you plan on getting home?”

“Well the bus doesn’t run this late, so I was gonna walk. It’s only a couple miles.”

“Now who’s being fucking stupid? You wanna walk, through inner city Detroit, alone, at one in the morning?”

“Then, I’ll call an Uber, whatever. Why does it even matter to you?” Gavin sneered, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Because I need you to show up to work, Reed. Despite your attitude, you’re actually a good detective.”

“Yeah, well so is your plastic prick.” Gavin bristled. “Don’t pretend to be concerned about the DPD when you just wanna make sure you have a clear conscience; you’re not that good at lying.” He turned away.

He didn’t feel good, none of the usual adrenaline he usually got from confrontation. Maybe it was the liquor, or the cold, or the fact that it had gotten a bit too personal, but he felt like the ass Hank saw him as. Before walking away, he looked over his shoulder, “you’re welcome, by the way.”

“For what?” Hank scowled. Gavin could feel he wasn’t going to win this one.

“For the company? I figure Connor probably makes you feel shitty enough for drinking, might as well not let you do it alone.” He threw a wave over his shoulder. It wasn't the first time he'd accompanied Hank to the bar. What had started several weeks ago as the two of them sitting side by side and wallowing in their respective issues had become just as much of a habit as the self-destructive tendencies they both tended to engage in. Sometimes they took the bus back to Gavin's apartment, and Hank crashed on the couch, but most nights Gavin walked and Hank drove himself home, and Gavin tried not to think about the blatant disregard for any kind of public safety. They never talked about it.

As he began to walk away, Hank caught his wrist in a grip that was a lot more confident than Gavin would have expected. “Fucking what do you want from me?!” He bit, turning to relieve the uncomfortable position Hank had pulled him into. The liquor and tension had loosened his language, so much so that every sentence felt like it lacked gravity if not weighed on with profanity. Hank released him slightly, but unsteadily lurched forward to grab at Gavin’s unzipped coat.

He kissed Gavin first, and while Gavin’s instincts told him that Hank was drunk (probably more so than himself) he caved a little at the touch. He knew it was wrong to take advantage, but he also knew that this was defining. If he denied this, there wasn’t going to be a second slip up from Hank. So, he let it happen, he sighed as he gave into it, Hank releasing his jacket only to push his hand beneath it and rest on Gavin’s waist apprehensively. Gavin stepped into Hank's warmth, chin tilted up as he stood close enough that their chests were touching. The closeness presented itself as intimacy, and suddenly Gavin's chest felt too-tight with longing for more than he knew he could have.

When they separated, their vaporized breaths danced together in the blue-white cast of the street light. Hank was holding Gavin against him, both arms around his waist now and cool palms resting against the small of his back. They lingered for a long moment until Gavin turned his face away, "We're drunk." He mused regretfully.

"Speak for yourself, Reed."

"I am, and I'm speaking for you too." He offered, but with little bite. Hank released him slightly, Giving Gavin the option to leave his hold but not about to pull away. "You shouldn't drive." Gavin said in a quiet tone. He rested his hands on Hank's arms. Hank offered a quirk of one side of his mouth, somewhere between futile and apologetic. "Why don't you walk me home?" Gavin soothed with a small smile. Hank smiled back.

Gavin had been pulling long ass shifts for as long as he could remember. At first, it was just to prove himself and make a name for himself as a dedicated detective. But now it was because he couldn’t sleep. He lived off break room coffee, cigarettes and occasional protein bar. He only went home to feed his cats and provide them with some company. Then it was back to the station or to whatever crime scene had just been called in. He was running on fumes, but he couldn’t stop.

“Reed, you better stop with this running yourself ragged shit or you’re gonna drop dead in the middle of the station.” A firm, but concerned voice came from Hank, who had followed him outside.

Gavin turned his head to the source of the voice, cigarette kept in place between his two fingers, moving it to his lips and taking a drag letting the thick smoke fill up his lungs his shoulders relaxing.

“You’ll be the first one to celebrate once I do. Follow your own advice first, Anderson. Don’t act like I haven’t seen you pulling double shifts and then get piss drunk when you go home. Fuck off.” His eyes flicking over back again once he had dismissed the older man.

“Gavin…” in a tone Gavin hadn’t heard since he first started here.

“No! You don’t get to pull that shit with me. You’ve lost your right to.” His eyes flame up, and then are full of hurt, Hank just takes it, and looks at him with guilt.

“Yeah, I know. Just… take care of yourself.” Swallowing hard. Eyes lingering on the younger man before leaving to get back inside.

He remembered when those eyes used to stare at him in love and fondness but now, on the days he’s sober, all he sees is pain and regret. Gavin took another long drag before heading inside with a scoff. It was all in the past now. No point dwelling on it.

-----

Even during his beat cop days Gavin had heard stories about Hank Anderson. He was the youngest person in Detroit Police Department history to earn the title Lieutenant. From the stories he had developed a bit of a crush on the man. He remembers the first time seeing him. Someone had called in a crime and he was the first responder there. Detective Anderson was there, twinkle of something challenging in his eye, jawline strong, his shoulders broad. Tina caught him staring and nudged him on the side.

“Go talk to him, asshole. You were the first one here. Catch him up to speed.” She urged.

Gavin felt his mouth go dry, and his hands clam up. He would actually be able to talk to the man himself. He took a deep breath and went over to him.

“Lieutenant Anderson you made it.” He tried to sound as cool as possible, lowering his voice a pitch.

“You’re the one who called it in?” He raised an eyebrow at him, those brilliant blue eyes standing out even in the dark of the night. Gavin tried to keep his knees from buckling. The man was a legend and he could tell he was already analyzing him. Gavin’s young soft features and scar across the bridge of his nose that seemed out of place, fresh out of the academy and just eager to prove himself.

“Yes, sir.” He replied straightening himself out (as much as his gay ass possibly could).

Hank let out a dry chuckle, amused at Gavin calling him that.

“Well, lay it on me newbie. Let’s see what we got.” His eyes roaming over the gruesome crime scene. There was a certain sick excitement that Gavin understood wanting to piece information together to get the end result.

“I got a call about shouting in the street and came to check it out. Looked like a drug deal gone bad.”

“That was my first guess too.” Hank nodded, hanging onto Gavin’s every word.

“Doesn’t seem like it was an addict that did it. I think it was someone else.”

Hank’s eyes flicked over to Gavin in curiosity. “What makes you say that?” interested.

“The drugs are still there. If it was an addict, they would have taken off with it.” He said confidently.

“Thinking about bein’ a detective, kid?” sizing him up once again, only in much greater detail. God he was so hot, Gavin felt like he was about short circuit.

“Sure am.”

“Well, you’re on a good path. I’m sure I’ll see you soon.” Flashing a grin, wink, and clapping a hand on his shoulder before brushing past him to make his way closer towards the crime scene. Gavin was so thankful it was dark out because the red that burned on his cheeks would have definitely been noticeable.

He looked over at Tina who was making crude sexual hand gestures. Gavin flipped her off and his eyes roamed back over to Hank. The Lieutenant caught Gavin staring and offered him another wink before going back to examining the crime scene.

 -----

“I don’t need you or your plastic pet fucking up my crime scene.” An extra bite of bitterness danced on his tongue as he tried to keep them from passing the police tape that blocked off the area.

“Listen, we just came here to help, Reed.” Hank tried to argue.

Neither of them knew when it got this bad between the two of them. Connor looked at both with indifference but both of them knew this was a level of hostility both have become far too familiar with.

“I don’t need your help, Anderson.” Acid on his tongue.

They refused to say each other’s first names because it would just remind themselves of how sweet it used to taster on their tongues.

“Well, lucky me. I don’t need your permission.” Hank merely shrugged.

Gavin scowled at him his shoulders tensing but knew since Hank was his superior, he couldn’t do anything about it. He stepped aside, averting his eyes trying desperately to find something more interesting than Hank’s blue eyes.

----

A ray of sunshine beat again his eyelids as he let out a moan of discomfort. The he woke up to the smell of Hank’s earthy and spicy scent wanting so badly to bottle it up, so he could smell him whenever.  

“You not a morning person?” Hank’s voice rumbled from behind him, sounding like he had been awake for quite awhile .

“I just don’t like the sun beating into my retinas, asswipe.” Sleepiness still clinging to his words.

Hank let out an amused chuckle wrapped his arms around Gavin’s naked waist, his large calloused hands resting on his hips. Gavin turned around to face the other man in his bed. He peered into Hank’s kind and warm pools of blue getting lost in them. 

“What’s funny, asshole?” he playfully challenged.

“Are you usually this scrappy in the morning?” a smile cracking onto Hank’s face.  

“I’ve still got a lot of energy from last night.” He purred, a glint of mischievousness in his eyes as he traced a finger on the curls on Hank’s chest.

“I’m sure we can find something to work that energy off.” He replied before pulling him into a kiss. Gavin melted into the kiss and let out a pleased sigh.

“Be gentle with me it’s my first time.” feigning innocence once he broke the kiss.

Hank threw his head back and laughed before rolling over on top of Gavin, the younger man wrapping his arms around the Lieutenant’s neck and pulling him down to give a soft bite to his lower lip.

“We’re gonna be late.”

“Then you better think of a pretty good excuse.”

 ------

“I can’t let you do that! Leave it alone, now!” Connor voice pierced through the thick tension of the interrogation room as he pried Chris off the deviant android.

Gavin felt his blood boil, his own status felt like it was being threatened. His fingers itching and thrilled at the opportunity to pull his gun out and pointing it directly at the deviant hunter android.

“I warned you, motherfucker!” ready to pull the trigger at any moment with no regrets whatsoever.

Hank’s tone just done with all the fuckery in the room, a voice that Gavin has only really heard in their encounters in the bathroom stalls and in the back of Hank’s car. Gavin wanted to snarl at the audacity that Hank had in bringing that tone here thinking it would rein him in like some obedient bitch.

“Mind your own business, Hank.” Each word his bit out with gritted teeth as his hand gripped tightly around the gun. Looks like Hank found himself a new boy toy and Gavin was not pleased about it at all.

He heard the click before the Lieutenant said anything. Gavin not wanting to look. He knew damn well Hank wouldn’t pull a gun on him.

“I said that’s enough.” His voice laced with authority Gavin had forgotten Hank once carried.

The younger man looked over to see Hank’s handgun pointed directly at him. He felt his heart crack, but he wouldn’t let it show as his eyes flicked over back to look at the goofy looking deviant hunter.

“Fuck!” he muttered lowering his gun, he and Hank shared a look of defiance and hurt. Gavin left without another word as he angrily stormed out, slamming the door behind him.

------ 

“Hey handsome, you come here often?” Gavin waggled his eyebrow flirtatiously, his elbow rest on the counter in the break room, all adorned in his police uniform.

“I work here. What’s your angle? Trying to get details on the case I’m working on? Cuz you’ll have to try harder.” Hank looked over from pouring his coffee, setting his steaming mug onto the counter beside him.

Gavin’s mouth was pulled into a genuine smile, one that made Hank’s heart skip a beat. No one should ever be this charming.  

“I’ve got news.”

“Don’t tell me you’re pregnant.”

Gavin snorted. 

“Yeah, and Ben’s the father.”

Hank rolled his eyes and let a smile grace his lips at Gavin’s joke.

“Just…come over tonight and I’ll tell ya.”

“Sure. I get off in a few hours.”

 -----

The door that lead inside creaked open to reveal a less than happy Hank Anderson. 

“You’re pissed at me, I get that. But don’t take it out on Connor.”

“Sorry I was mean to your new sex toy but I’m just trying to get my job done.” Their arguments so plentiful at this point Reed can’t bring himself to act like he cared as he took a long drag of his cigarette.

Hank let out a sigh of frustration.

“Reed…” he started out. Gavin refused to look at him, focusing more on the sound of the rain clinking against the metal roofs of the cars.

“We can’t keep doing this.”

“I’m not doing anything, Anderson. I’m just trying to do my job. All you have to do is make sure you’re sober enough to do yours.”

Hank’s mouth twitched as his eyebrows knit together in a fowl annoyance.

“You better watch that mouth of yours.”

“You better get the fuck out of my way.”

“What is your problem with me? I know we didn’t end on the best of terms but…”

“But what? We could be friends? Drinking buddies? After everything, you must be joking, you old fuck.” His body yearning for another cigarette so he pulled on out and lit it. Hank gave him a look of disapproval but didn’t say anything because of his own habits and addiction.

“I would have waited.”

Gavin snapped his head over to Hank’s direction. His gaze challenging him to have the balls to say another word.

“You wanted to settle down, have a family with 2.5 kids and a white picket fence. That’s not me. Even if you did wait, which, how long was it before you had your dream life? 6 months? That’s all it took for you to forget about me.”

“I never fuckin’ forgot about you! You’re right! I wanted the life you couldn’t stand. Gavin, you were 24. Still had you whole life ahead of you. Your career. You left for Chicago and then came back 4 years later not expecting me to move on? You never called, hell, not even a text. Of-fucking-course I was gonna move on and settle down.”

Gavin was silent for a moment and blowing out smoke from his parted lips before slowly turning his head towards Hank.

“Yeah, and how’d that work out for you?”

------

“So, what was so important that you had to wait to tell me here?” Hank started as he sat at the kitchen table watching Gavin cook for the both of them. Hank got up and wrapped his arms around Gavin’s torso place a soft kiss at the back of his neck as the beat cop stirred whatever he was cooking in the pan.

“You’re so fuckin’ impatient.” He grinned, reveling at the feeling of Hank pressed against him.

“You bring out the worst in me.” He joked, giving his ear a nibble, causing the younger man to chuckle.

Setting the burner on low he turned around to face Hank, his smile still etched on his face.

“I got a promotion. You’re lookin’ at Detective Reed now.” His eyes shining with satisfaction but nervous sitting in the pit of his stomach awaiting to hear what Hank thought.

“No shit?” Hank asked.

“No shit.”

Hank’s face broke into an ecstatic beam as he lifted Gavin off the ground and spun him around. Gavin let out a surprised choke that melted into a laugh.

“You did it! I knew you’d fuckin do it!” his voice boomed throughout the apartment full of elation and eyes lit with pride.

Hank came to a stop and Gavin pulled him into a kiss, both smiling into it.  Setting Gavin on the kitchen counter the two continued to kiss until Gavin pulled away, his expression becoming more serious.

Hank’s smiled began to fade at seeing Gavin’s face.

“There somethin’ else?”

“They…offered me a job.”

“Where?”

“Chicago.”

-------- Gavin felt his head rattle as Hank pushed him against the wall with a growl, the man’s knuckles turning white from how hard he was gripping the lapels of his jacket.

“What the fuck did you say?” his voice dripping with anger.

The younger man’s gaze steeled.

“You wanted to run off and play family man. How the fuck did that work out for you?” Gavin bit back. Hank’s eyes whirled with pain, anger, and guilt. Gavin tried t hard not to feel bad but there was a deep ache in his chest. Hank looked heartbroken, his eyes glossy with unshed tears.

Gavin immediately regretted it, he felt Hank’s grip loosen.

“Hank, I…” with an uncharacteristic amount of gentleness in his voice and the man’s first name feeling strange on his tongue. When did he get this vindictive? When did he decide it was fine to hurt a man he still loves?

Hank saw the regret in his eyes, he leaned his head on the crook of his neck and let out a sputtered sob. Gavin stood still, shocked. He forgot what it felt like to have Hank pressed up against him like this. Nothing sexual, not like the anger fueled one night stands they’ve had. This was more vulnerable. Gavin felt his own vision blur with tears he didn’t know started leaking from his eyes.

Wrapping his arms around the taller man, he took in the familiar scent. He remembered when his pillows still smelled of him a few weeks after he moved to Chicago. He remembered how he would love the smell as it clung to his oversized shirts he wore around Hank’s apartment.

“I’m sorry, Hank. Shit…I’m so sorry for everything.” He tried to keep his voice from cracking. The pain he had held onto for so long. The pain both of them held onto poisoning their interaction with each person.

It would get better. Gavin swore he would start pulling his weight to fix this shit.

 -------

Hank had been getting better. He was watching his diet, hadn’t touched a drink in months, and was just generally slowly reverting back to his old self.

Gavin felt mixed emotions. He knew this was Connor’s work. He knew Hank smiled at the android with a smile that was once only reserved for Hank’s closest friends. He hadn’t looked at him like that in years. It added anther crack and wall over Reed’s heart. Hank was capable of healing…Gavin just wasn’t worth healing for. Connor was a breath of fresh air for Hank and endless pool of patience.

He could only watch from afar and Hank threw his head back and laughed at something Connor had said. Gavin’s stomach knotted as he noticed Hank looked years younger.

Hank caught him staring and the two locked eyes with one another. Gavin couldn’t look away. Hank simply gave him a soft smile before going back to look at his terminal.

The passing days have gone smoother. Gavin learning to let go of his anger and rage that boiled inside him. Therapy really helped. Some days were better than others but he was really just trying to get by. Things with Hank went from bad to civil. Even giving each other small waves and smiles when they.

They weren’t like before. They couldn’t be. Both healing in their own ways, their banter was now warm towards each other and they could sometimes see inklings of their younger selves in each other.

 ‘Dinner @ 8?’ a brilliant pink cat-shaped sticky note stuck to his computer in Hank’s handwriting. A smile curled onto Gavin’s face trying hard not to beam at the note in such a public place.