#hanbada

I strongly disagree.

Min-woo doesn't see Young-woo as an equal adversary.

That implies inherent respect for her abilities.

He sees her as a threat and is jealous of every kindness shown to her.

YES, Min-woo doesn't infantalize Young-woo, BUT he dehumanizes her.

He doesn't want anyone to protect Young-woo or give her grace to adjust to the workplace at her own pace NOT because he thinks she doesn't need it. But because he's scared that she would become even stronger because of it.

And to his mind, the woman who should have been eliminated from the competition because of her disability but is now actively threatening his chances at bagging a permanent position at Hanbada, should not get any more help or kindness. Because her existence at his own level is an inherent unfairness.

So, in no world is this respect for Young-woo's strengths.

And Joon-ho, Soo-yeon, or the senior attorney being kind to Young-woo is NOT pity.

They all know she's incredible.

Each of them is careful to only step in and help Young-woo in the things that she struggles with. Like Soo-yeon opening bottles for her.

All of us need friends who notice our weaknesses and quietly help us. That's not disrespect or somehow failing to acknowledge our strengths. It's caring shown through actions.

So, please stop confusing Min-woo's apathy as respect.

1) A post I re-blogged over the weekend noted critically that us fan reviewers have not been paying enough attention to the connection between the cases and the personal matters of the characters, and I think that criticism is so valid and spot on for this episode. Because what did this case ultimately focus on? That’s right, what we’ve all been asking for throughout this series: COMMUNICATION!

The case focused on ways in which information gets communicated (or hacked, or leaked, or whatever).

The legal question at hand is: the private data of most of the population got leaked. What should the punishment be for this leaking?

To phrase the question very differently (ha): what should be private? What does privacy mean?

One of the main issues that the show grapples with is how Young-woo communicates, as an autistic person in a mostly nautistic world. I’m going to play with this for a bit, and I welcome constructive criticism on my thinking.

I’ve mentioned previously that I went to grad school for social welfare (note: I’m not a therapist, but I took many courses in direct clinical practice). Therapists very often struggle with setting up a micro-macro understanding of the world for their clients. In other words: if Young-woo is a client of a therapist, how can that therapist help Young-woo understand that her own style of thinking and communicating is not a, or the, primary way in which the majority of the population interacts with each other?

This is a tremendously difficult issue to grapple with in the therapeutic relationship, and it speaks to a societal push-and-pull, a give-and-take of our society to offer SPACE and VALIDITY to our fellow humans who do not communicate like the majority of our societies. As well, it speaks to Young-woo’s own push-and-pull of how she learns to engage with society herself as she grows and gains in her adulthood. Micro-to-macro, macro-to-micro: from Young-woo out to the world, from the world back to Young-woo.

Going back to the hacking for a second: it is generally understood that mass hacking and sharing of personal data is bad and subject to prosecution. (Although the plot doesn’t necessarily condemn hacking itself.)

Connecting this to the interpersonal relationships displayed in this episode: Attorney Jang is punishing Young-woo for her style of communication as “bad,” or arrogant.

Separately, many folks on the tag have been talking about how Young-woo and Jun-ho communicate, and some folks have even demanded from Young-woo more communication from herself. There’s been incredible feedback from folks who are autistic combating that back and recognizing Young-woo’s non-communication in difficult emotional moments as authentic and valid. 

I want to tie this all together, because I think it speaks to how absolutely nuanced and in-the-moment the nature of communication is. Every second of our waking days are spent negotiating how we all, as humans, communicate with the world and ourselves. We type on Tumblr. We get coffee from baristas. We argue with our parents. We argue with our partners and our children. We love and connect and verbalize with the people around us. We self-deprecate to ourselves.

AND. We DON’T always say things. We DON’T always verbalize. We give our parents the silent treatment. We take a break from our partners to zone out. Our non-communication.....is communication.

I say ALL of this, because I think this episode really neatly tied together a lot of loose knots we’ve been feeling about the way in which the “world” of EAW accepts Young-woo in society and vice versa. Ultimately, the case was about how communication of a certain kind (data) was mishandled. This episode demonstrated, from an interpersonal perspective, how communication and information can also be handled, and mishandled, intimately. 

2) Which takes us to Young-woo and Jun-ho, and Young-woo and Attorney Jung, because I think their stories in this episode were linked. 

Young-woo ran to the hospital to literally plead to Attorney Jung to not die (ha). What’s that we saw from Young-woo? Empathy! (She’s such a badass, y’all, I so love her. Running into that hospital like that.)

And Jun-ho. Young-woo is concerned for his loneliness. A commenter on one of my previous posts noted the same loneliness connection to Young-woo’s dad, and it’s so spot on. Young-woo has internalized this shame for supposedly rendering folks lonely. She believes she will make Jun-ho lonely.

What is she showing to Jun-ho? Empathy. Even if the content of what she’s saying is not what we want her to say -- she’s communicating a love and empathy for Jun-ho that demonstrates an adult kind of growth that anyone can appreciate and emulate, regardless if you are autistic or nautistic. 

What I truly appreciate about this show is that, for me, Young-woo’s growth is contextualized from the frame of her autism. But it is ABSOLUTELY APPLICABLE TO EVERY ONE OF US AS ADULTS. We can all grow and become more empathic. We can all appreciate that we might make our partners lonely. It happens. Divorce rates are high for a reason, y’all! We ALL need to work on our empathic responses, right? We’re not perfect.

Young-woo is WORKING on herself, to understand herself as a partner, even while she thinks her lens is still self-centered. She’s learning. I don’t know of a more empathic meditation that any human, autistic or nautistic, could undertake. It’s just gorgeously written. It literally makes me want to weep, because it is all SO HUMAN, and Young-woo embodies this beautifully.

3) One other Jun-ho note. “Why can’t we be together?”, he asks. Remember what I said about that micro-to-macro-and-back existence, the push-and-pull of your intimate self to the world and back again. My gorgeous homeboy (heh) needs to reflect on what Young-woo’s positioning is in the world to understand the meaning of his question, and I’d like to see some self-reflection on his part (although I will totally get if the writers don’t have space to do that). That would be my ideal scenario. He’s putting a lot on her, and I am gently criticizing that set-up, and would like to see it addressed if possible. (But I get that the writers are also using that moment to demonstrate Young-woo’s empathy.)

Okay, this is so long already, but a few more quick points and then two footnotes, sorrryyy.

4) WTF, Attorney Jang, how the hell did you become a senior partner? Seriously, you do NOT act in court like that! W.T.F. Not being able to carry out MULTIPLE arguments, especially in the face of counter-arguments? Seriously embarrassing. 

That little, conniving, sniveling, little POS. Oof. CEO Han, pay attention! 

Okay, with that out of the way (ha), he was a great demonstration for arrogance and insecurity. I liked comparing his insecurity to Young-woo’s total security in her legal analysis, and insecurity in her personal life. An easy reflection on a lack of empathy vs. a growth in empathy.

5) I don’t know what’s happening with Min-woo, y’all, lol. I’m going to wait to pass judgement until tomorrow. Is he fighting himself between wanting to have a relationship with Su-yeon vs. his desire for world domination between Hanbada and Taesan? I have no idea. Let’s just see.

6) I saw some criticism on the tag regarding Su-yeon and her pushing Young-woo in ableist ways, and I think the criticism is worth meditating on, again from this push-and-pull framework of how Young-woo interacts internally and externally with the world. Su-yeon, at least from my POV, is framing the way the world works, from her POV, to Young-woo. I think some folks might want Su-yeon to help Young-woo exist in the world in only Young-woo’s way. But, as I said up above, that’s unfortunately not entirely the way the world works. In my mind, Su-yeon does demonstrate bravery for representing Young-woo’s legal analysis in court, but I do VERY much get that that can be criticized. 

I take that along with the question of why Jun-ho drove away with Attorney Jang. Attorney Jang got rid of Young-woo. Su-yeon spoke up. He was about to get rid of Su-yeon when Min-woo spoke up. Young-woo, Jun-ho, Su-yeon, and Min-woo each interacted (or were interacted with) POWER, as represented by Attorney Jang, in different ways. They all met or stretched their own limits in the face of power. Su-yeon, representing Young-woo’s legal analysis in court, was grappling, in her own way, in the face of the power that Hanbada put in front of her in the figure of Attorney Jang.

AND -- we can see that Attorney Jung, our beloved senior partner, demonstrates HIS power far differently than Attorney Jang. With -- what? EMPATHY. Full circle, baby!

Alright. WOW. THAT’S IT, except for the footnotes. SEE YOU TOMORROW! AAAHHHHH!!!

****

* I’m definitely processing the news of season two. I’ll get more clarity on my feelings after we see what happens tomorrow. I’ll be particularly curious about how they handle Kang Tae-oh’s enlistment.

FUCK THAT BITCH. You know what I hate Minwoo but I can kinda get he has so much on his shoulder that he just wants to get at the top,earn more because in his warped logic, Young woo is the stronger one. I do not justify or agree with it. It's childish for a man who seems like he had to grow up early. He deserves slaps BUT this Han bitch though.. is really using young woo against tae sumi over what? Some college rivalry? She deserves slaps too. Harder ones in fact.

Also,at the end scene,the news said the whatever hearing? is going to take place in a month? and the CEO told the reporter to publish the news about woo young woo being tae sumi's illegitimate right before the hearing. Then in next week's trailer,we see young woo being mobbed by reporters and cameras who I am assuming are there because the article that she is tae sumi's daughter is already out?

So this means Junho and Young woo would've been working together, both of them SUFFERING in silence because Young woo thinks she would be a burden to him and Junho thinking he put too much pressure on her. You idiots! You love each other! Taaaaaalk to each other pleeeaaaaaaase. Then kiss and make up. I AM NOT PLAYING.

Or maybe the news broke out earlier idk but those two need to talk!

Also by the last episode I was sure they never intended to "redeem" him. Yet. Or whatever like they're definitely leaving it for S2 his jerkishness has been unjerked and his edges have been softened only so that the ending doesn't leave a bad aftertaste.

This or maybe they're trying to show that people's life philosophy isn't that easy to change.

He does do all that stuff but not because he believes it's right by his own moral compass but cuz of his wittle cwush.

Though I could see him growing into liking the feelings he felt when doing decent human being things.

let me explain why I am upset with Kwon Minwoo's redemption attempt in case you too were conflicted about liking him at the end cause something still felt very, very off.

It was because they redeemed him for the wrong sin.

Kwon Minwoo has been called a tactician and strategist throughout the show so much that even the writer seemed to think that his main problem was that he was too cautious and liked to stay safe by playing up to authority and refusing to challenge it.

So his final arc was written to inspire some courage in him so he would stand up and defend his colleagues instead of pandering to his senior's ego.

And the inspiration was injected through Soo-yeon's affection for him.

So finally the cowardly lion found some "foolish" courage and all was well.

EXCEPT IT WAS NOT.

Kwon Min-woo was never hated by the fandom because he was too cautious to stand up for his friends or take any risks.

The man walked into Taesun and blackmailed Tae Su-mi.

Stomp on that silly notion right now.

KWON MIN-WOO IS AN ACE OPPORTUNIST.

The drama hasn't told us anything from her perspective yet, but there are some indisputable facts and some likely possibilities.

She was in her early 20s, a promising student with a bright career in law ahead. She fell in love and got pregnant and suddenly her whole future looked dark. She was considering abortion, but at the desperate pleas of the man she loved, she agreed to go through with the pregnancy. She stayed at home for 9 months, risked her reputation and her life to give birth in a home where she must have faced constant hostility from her parents, and then gave the child up.

I have a lot of admiration for this woman.

She didn't have to go through the pregnancy. She didn't have to take a long leave from school causing rumours to arise which followed her around for decades. She didn't have to stay stuck at home for so many months, in a likely cold household where she would have faced immense pressures to abort the child.

She went through all of it because the father wanted the baby to be born and Tae Su-mi respected that choice.

From Young-woo's perspective, her mother abandoned her and that's a fact too.

But I can't see Tae Su-mi as the villain when she clearly went through an extremely painful period of mourning for giving Young-woo up. It seems clear to me that she only decided to keep the child because she knew she could trust Young-woo's dad to raise her well.

And while I absolutely love Woo Gwang-ho, Dad, I can't see him as just the valiant hero.

He gave up his career and made his own life extremely hard. Then he made Young-woo the center of his existence to the point where he thinks he has the right to decide whether or not his Junior can use his daughter to needle her mother.

"You can do it just once! I will permit it once!" he tells the woman, as if hurting Tae Su-mi is a justifiable action and using Young-woo as the weapon is an acceptable price to him.

But Young-woo isn't his possession.

And Tae Su-mi isn't a villain for choosing not to be with this man.

And I want to respect that perspective (even though I immediately argued with her 🤣) but also say a little bit in explanation of the context.

Her main complaint was that the central figure of Bang Gu-ppong was far too idealistic. Extrapolating from that, I figure his exhortation that children need to "play immediately!" right now and every day felt too simple and impractical an ideology against the parents' desire to push their children to excel so they have comfortable careers as adults. But here's the thing.

We have watched similar plot lines in kdramas for decades. We've watched children be bullied, commit suicide, drop out, do horrible things to their friends, lie and cheat, become desperate and disheartened in drama after drama after drama.

We know it's a real problem. Children in Asian countries (not just South Korea, but China, Japan, India, et al) are treated like job horses by their parents. Only instead of earning money now, they're preparing throughout their childhood to someday earn a lot of money in the future.

There are international policies that try to enforce children's right to a childhood, but for most Asian countries that means little. Parents are far too focused on making sure their children don't grow up to earn less than them. So yeah, I know the treatment of this plot may have felt silly and may not have connected with a lot of viewers. But dramaland has given us this story for decades in every way possible.

Dark, gritty, real, pragmatic, inspiring, hopeful, desperate.

This is one more way. It's far more idealistic and not necessarily what children really need, but it's a good way to bring at least one thing to light. A child's right to consent.

I liked it.