Any tips to keep critters from eating your pumpkins? Something or other has eaten every one of my buds ):
Ugh, I'm sorry to hear that! I think the answer varies depending on what kind of critter. Everyone's go-to answer for both insects and rodents seems to be hot pepper spray, but honestly I tried that one year where I had the same problem, and it didn't help. Frankly I’m pretty over these ~sprinkle coffee grounds / eggshells / pictures of Danny DeVito on your garden to keep pests away~ style tips, so I won’t even go into detail.
What do I actually do when there are critters afoot? Steel cages. Heavy handed? yes. Success rate for me, so far? 100%.
Go on down to the hardware store and get yourself a roll of hardware cloth. I'm not sure why it's called that. It's not cloth. It's a roll of steel mesh. It comes in different spacings - buy whatever's cheapest as long as the holes are too small for a rodent to fit through. (On that note, this strategy is obviously useless against insects.) You'll also need some wire cutters.
Roll this out flat and cut and cut out it into lengths that you can fashion into cages. Like, cubes but with no bottom. Of course you'll want to think through what size pieces to cut according to how big you want the finished cages to be.
Here's one flattened out. I drew it because the picture is hard to understand. Cut on white, bend on gray.
These can be placed over your young pumpkins or up-and-coming flowers (depending on the location of the flowers, this is often easier said than done.) Depending how your handiwork comes out, the folded sides can naturally create a little notch in 2 opposite ends that the stem/vine can pass through (see bottom left of photo). If not, you could cut a little notch.
Astoundingly I don't have a picture of one of these in action, but here they are protecting seedlings from birds/rabbits, which is another useful purpose. I've been using these same cages for years, they were a good investment.
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Dream Journal 2017-12-07: My Subconscious Attempts To Make Bilingual Memes And Other Brief Adventures
Purchased an old 7-story house from a former Stanford professor. The house had seen better days, but I got it for waaaaaaaaay below market value and it would be a pretty kick-ass house if I renovated it. The very top floor had a functional pipe organ, and as soon as I saw it, I asked my wife to play some spooky music on it. She obliged, and now our house will be forever known as the spooky music house.
I decided to use the phrase “general whorishness” as my default catchphrase for a day. It did not go over well with people, as you can probably imagine.
A glowing green electrical cable spoke to me via telepathy and tried to convince me to kill myself by plugging the cable into an electrical outlet and jumping into a pool with the other end. I almost did it, but realized this was probably a stupid idea and chopped the cord into tiny pieces with a sword I conveniently happened to have on hand. NOT TODAY, SATAN!
My wonderful pen-pal, @gramizar, came to visit my wife and I and we went on a restaurant crawl and ate at ALL THE RESTAURANTS. And then a giant butt covered in black spandex appeared in the sky and gyrated angrily at us. Each buttcheek was the size of an entire person, and I didn’t feel like getting crushed by a strange butt in the sky, so we all just went back inside until the butt went away.
The image you see at the top of this post is my dreaming brain’s attempt at making memes. It is exactly how it appeared in the dream, except the egg carton was actually made of yellow styrofoam instead of recycled paper. For whatever reason, this was the first in a series called “Memes for Spanish Moms,” and it almost makes sense. I don’t speak Spanish, but that’s not a concern for my subconscious! It’s gonna make some bilingual memes, regardless of how good my command of additional languages is. And as luck would have it, the gibberish my subconscious poured out actually had some Spanish in it AND Google Translate was able to give me a crappy translation. According to Google, “no huevos se tendo“ means “no eggs are getting.” HAPPY ACCIDENTS!