#gosostrs

11:36 pm

armin was dragged away by his frat brothers when you two made it down the stairs. his adrenaline was already pumping from being caught, mixed with alcohol and weed. he was in the moment.

they’d taken him to a chugging competition happening in the kitchen. they'd been trying to get every brother to join and armin wasn't an exception. he’d been put on the spot since he’d 'disappeared’ for a while. the crowd around him grew bigger as they watched him go up against a pledge.

as they started, the chants of ‘chug, chug, chug’ grew louder, causing armin to give it his all. the goal was to see who could finish 2 cups of floch’s jungle juice the quickest. the loser had to drink another 2. armin was already reaching his limit and didn’t want to spend the next morning sick, especially when he’d be with you.

as the cold liquid slid down his throat he held back coughs and gags at the taste. he was winning as the pledge seemed to be fighting back the urge to throw up, probably already having too much to drink. armin finished his last cup before crushing it on the kitchen counter.

the group around the two of them roared as they grabbed armin and shook him around. he was enjoying the praise. the pledge slowly realized there were 2 more cups in front of him being filled as armin was still being celebrated.

the drink seemed to be hitting armin a little faster now as he felt himself getting lighter and lighter by the second. he talked to some people as they stood around waiting for the drunk boy to finish his cups. in the midst of all the craziness, armin caught a glimpse of the trio he’d grown to see more often than he’d like.

he seemed to sober up for a second as he paused. he didn’t expect them to be here. he was surprised he hadn’t seen reiner earlier but the house was packed. he felt like the roles should’ve been reversed right now; he knew what he’d been doing all night, who he was pretending to be all night.

armin snapped out of it as he realized how his shift of energy would probably be noticed. he’d pushed the questions and feelings he had down, bringing out one of his ‘personas’. the people around him hadn't seemed to notice his lapse in character; they were too focused on getting more people to chug drinks.

armin faked checking his instagram as he quickly texted a special someone, “meet in bathroom, down the hall.” he shoved his phone into his pocket as he watched more victims be forced into the game.

as the crowd in the kitchen grew larger, as more people joined, he slipped away using the excuse of wanting to put a song on. he moved through the ocean of bodies as he headed for the bathroom instead.

walking down the hallway there were random couples kissing against the wall, getting too touchy for one's liking. others leaned, trying to steady themselves in their drunk state while fighting back the urge to throw up or fall asleep.

he slowly opened the door of the lit bathroom. she sat on the closed toilet so relaxed. armin could tell she’d already been drinking by the look she always got in her eyes when she did.

he closed and locked the door behind him as he leaned against it. he hadn’t thought this through. he was being irrational, especially with his intoxicated state, but it was too late. it was just them now. who knew when he’d get to be with her alone again?

he let out a mumbled, “didn't know you were coming.” he was someone else now. he stared at her shoes, not looking her in the eyes, too nervous to do so.

“didn’t ask.” she responded so smoothly. this meant nothing to her.

“ri- right, sorry.” he tripped over his words as he scanned her up and down. armin didn't dare look her in the eye; all he could do was bite his lip.

the muffled sound of low life by future was heard as a silence filled the cramped space. armin felt like he could hear the blood pumping in his veins. he wasn't sure if it was because of her or him not being able to come down from his prior activities.

annie’s voice cut the tension, “good party.” she took a second to really analyze armin now.

he meekly nodded his head, “yea-” it seemed unnatural. this wasn't him. he hadn't been himself the entire time. he was fronting as someone else yet again.

armin’s thought process had been cut off as annie got up and closed the space between them. her stride was smooth and quick as she pressed her lips on his. he could taste the alcohol on her breath, and so could she.

he was intoxicated from the lack of air as he traded kisses with her. he was picking up where you two had left off. he was left unsatisfied after being interrupted by jean. he couldn't help but melt into her touch, hoping to get that high he was chasing from before.

his back left the door as he leaned into annie more. his mind had gone almost completely blank since the moment he saw her. he had no plan but he knew deep inside what happens when they're alone. they both knew it; small talk was just a courtesy at this point. he plunged straight into the familiar waters that was her touch.

things seemed to pick up pace as annie's hand ran across his waist and near his belt. her other hand pulled him in deeper. armin’s hips thrusted forward as he felt himself drowning in her touch.

her hand palmed him over his jeans, teasing the length she felt growing up. he couldn't help but let his wants consume him. armin, in one swift motion, grabbed her by her thighs and lifted her to sit on the sink.

at the sudden change of position annie's back arched, causing her to move in closer. she wrapped her legs around his hips as they seemed to get drunk off each other. a few groans and gasps were let out between the two as things seemed to be leading up to a peak.

armin’s pants started to slowly unzip as annie let him attack her neck in kisses. his hands held her waist as he started unzipping hers as well. the bathroom seemed to be getting hotter by the second.

BANG BANG BANG!!

the two of them froze in their tracks. they turned their heads towards the door as a guy yelled from the other side, “yoo, open up, i need to take a leak!”

before he even finished, armin was already responding, “it's occupied.” his tone was firm but his voice didn't hold any anxiety at the thought of being caught.

that seemed to catch annie off guard. she turned her head to take a good look at who she was with right now. armin was usually a little on edge about sneaking around. he was never like that in general. his attitude was reminding her of someone she knew very well.

armin followed by letting out an annoyed groan. he was interrupted before, but being interrupted a second time? this was either a crazy coincidence or he had bad luck. he apparently can't catch a break tonight.

after the guy seemed to find another bathroom they fixed themselves. neither said a word as they knew the usual routine. annie took a little longer; she seemed thrown off. maybe the alcohol was getting to her but armin was starting to remind her of reiner.

she headed for the door, twisting the handle as she said something, “rei- armin.. i'll see you when i do.” and with that she was already slipping out the door and back to the party.

armin lingered in the bathroom a little longer as per usual. he took this as a chance for him to rinse his face, trying to keep his composure. did she also call him reiner?

he took in every second of what’s happened tonight. he looked back to how he's been acting in general. was the shift in his attitude due to being at a party hosted by his frat or something else? it couldn't be because of something else, right?

he didn’t want it to be true but he knew it was. even jean saw through him. you and annie saw through him as well. the look in your eyes when you were with him tonight was different; you were searching for something you only got when it was just you two alone. annie sensed it as well. she got to see both of the masks he tried to switch between. she saw him trying to see which one she ‘preferred’.

what was happening to him? why couldn’t he get a grip?

he dried off his face as he took one last look in the mirror. he tried to search for himself in his own reflection. he couldn't find what he was looking for, not in this state.

armin reached for the door handle, twisting it open. it felt like there was someone also twisting it as well. maybe that guy came back. he opened the door to be met with your face.

“oh my god-” he jumped back a little, spooked at your sudden appearance.

you seemed kind of thrown off but you laughed it off, “hello you.”

armin felt his heart drop for a second. if him and annie had kept at it in the bathroom you would've heard or even seen them. he silently thanked the universe for saving him from that situation.

you took in his slightly out-of-it appearance. maybe he was throwing up in the bathroom. he seemed to be reaching or already being at his limit. there was that same look on his face, the same you saw on 4th of july. you felt worried but you’d see him later. you could always ask in the morning when he was more sober.

armin seemed to come back as he let out an awkward laugh, “hi hi, sorry. you can go ahead.” he slid to the side of the bathroom. one of his hands found its way to your waist, leading you in. his eyes never looked at yours as his other hand scratched the nape of his neck.

all you could do was let out a small, “alright..” as you watched him shuffle down the hall. there it was again. that same 'switch’ that wasn’t the same guy you saw a while ago.

12:31 am

in the dining room they were playing cup pong. love me by lil wayne rang through the house as you decided to join in for the fun of it but ended up running into historia and ymir. they were from their summer long escape to the beach house. they waved you over when they spotted you. they were talking to ashley about what they did all summer.

historia changed her hair again. she had teal highlights mixed into the blonde with a black peekaboo under. that girl knew how to pick her looks and knew they would all look good.

their turn was up next and they asked you and ashley to join them. they were fiending to get a good game going and knew how competitive you all would get. people watching started trying to bet on the game and rile you all up.

historia and ymir stood at one end of the dinner table and you and ashley stood opposite. you were pretty good for now but you knew if you lost you’d be wasted beyond belief.

the couple across from you could tell the state you were in by the look in your eyes. they weren't sober either but they were slightly more sober than you. they had more of an upper hand but you two weren't gonna let that get in the way.

before the game started you pulled ashley closer to you. she looked at you before you leaned in towards her ear, “we better win or ima be fucked by the end of the night.”

she laughed you off slightly before winking at you, “don't worry you know i got this.” she acknowledged the fact that if they got a ball in you would be the one to drink all the cups. you accepted it but you didn't want to be counted indisposed for the later part of the game.

the game started and it was a back and forth. ymir and historia took turns drinking each time a ball made it into the cup. ashley seemed to be taking your ‘threat’ seriously as she tried her best to get as many balls into cups.

her efforts were nice but that didn’t stop your opponents' never faltering aim. there were a few misses every now and then but that seemed to make their aim get better.

the crowd forming around the table seemed to notice the increasing tension as white girl by shy glizzy seemed to be heightening the energy. there were people betting how many cups you had left before you threw up. with everything going on on the sidelines historia and ymir seemed to be getting distracted.

you and ashley took advantage of this as they started to miss shots more and more. ashley and you shot balls that made it into cups and got the two of them drunker by the minute.

in the end you and ashley won. you were a little drunker but it was alright. the two of you hugged and jumped around while shoving it in ymir and historia's faces. they couldn't be too salty as they found your overly dramatic celebration hilarious.

there was encouragement of a rematch but you couldn’t go through another game without probably leaving with ashley trying to keep you steady. the four of you made your way outside as you heard there was a keg. you couldn’t go to a frat party and not drink from the keg, it was almost like a rite of passage.

when you all got to the backyard you saw the keg and saw armin, eren, and guys from their chapter already surrounding it. they waved in your direction as the crowd grew louder and motioned you all over.

they were doing keg stands as they declared it was a 'tradition’. floch was coming down from being held up as he let out a scream, “lets fuckin goooo!” this seemed to rile everyone else up. they kept going on and on about how he set a record.

it was now armin and eren’s turn. eren went first as he made sure to tie back any hair that could get in his face. “yeager bomb,” was heard repeatedly chanted as he took his stance.

he got the nickname from his pledge days. one night he had the task of taking down a certain number of yeager meisters because of his last name. safe to say he didn’t disappoint as it turned into what he was known for.

he was flipped upside down as he started drinking from the keg. floch waved you guys closer and wrapped his arm around your waist. armin hadn't noticed your appearance, he was too immersed in the group.

“i told you i'd come back for you.” floch said over the crowd close to your face.

giving him a slight smirk you scoffed, “more like i came to you.” your eyes glanced towards armin. he was busy, he barely noticed more people joining the group. he seemed to be in ‘his’ element.

“hmmm, i dont think it makes much of a difference.” he playfully shrugged his shoulders as he egged on eren.

you jumped up and down next to floch joining along in the chant. armin perked up at the recognition of your voice. he searched and found you by floch's side. the way floch stared at you was so obvious. why was it so easy for others to show their real feelings towards you in the public eye but he seemed to cower at the thought.

he watched before looking away. this was his punishment. he’d be forced to watch as others got to enjoy your warmth while he only could accept it when you two weren't under any eyes.

as eren got down he wiped his mouth with a loud yell following behind. he got pats on the back as he headed to stand next to ashley before floch took him first. she laughed as some beer had escaped his mouth and left wet marks on the neck of his shirt.

armin was next. the group of boys hyped him up as they yelled out, “kent.” the name was developed as they thought armin lost his ‘nerdy’ look whenever he took off his glasses. it wasn't too far off. today he seemed to be someone else rather than the usual armin.

he got ready as they lifted him. you watched with excitement in your eyes. floch egged on armin telling him to, “just relax and swallow.” you elbowed him at the crude joke.

armin’s eyes flicked as he caught sight of the interaction. he went back to what he was doing. his eyes stayed focused on the keg as he made sure not to choke. his shirt lifted revealing his lower abdomen and showing it tensed up.

all you could do was watch as he kept drinking. he’d been there longer than eren. the boys got more hyped as they counted and it was nearing floch’s personal record. armin seemed to be trying to beat it.

he was trying to impress you or the guys in some way. the way floch was hanging all over you and the fact you were so relaxed about it made him slightly irritated. he needed to get one up on him twice in one night; beating the record and him being the one to take you home tonight.

his face turned red as he was reaching his limit. he only had to hold out a few more seconds before he had the new record. the crowd got louder as it seemed armin was going to get a new record and that he did.

when he got down he let out a loud burp while hitting a fist on his chest. everyone got wild at his lack of throwing up after all that. they surrounded him and kept chanting “kent” as armin stuck out his tongue.

he glanced over at you two only to be met with floch clapping at armin’s “achievement.” you jumped up and down next to him clapping as well. armin could tell you hadn't known that was a win in his books, you were just happy to be in the moment.

eren had reached armin with ashley in tow. he was worried at what armin was playing at. he wasn't the only one who knew how floch got around you. he wrapped his arm around his shoulders as he smiled and whispered to armin, “don’t puke.”

historia and ymir joined them as they greeted armin. everyone talked about them coming back. the two of them wanted to see the rest of the group on their way back into the house and people seemed to be spilling out. the house was full already but now it was overflowing as people were coming out the back to get away.

1:17 am

everyone somehow found their way to each other but soon parted as ymir, marco, and jean went to get drinks. they used this excuse knowing they all just didn't feel like dancing and wanted to get away from other people being on them.

that left you, ashley, connie, eren, armin, historia, and mikasa dancing. well trying to dance. it truly felt like people were on top of each other but that couldn't be helped. the lack of space was amplified as fm$ by new boys was playing. people started getting partners and yelling out the lyrics as flashes of cameras were turned on.

you and ashley danced on each other as others watched. eren and connie were dancing on the side as they both watched intently. you teased eren as you got behind ashley and smirked at him. your closeness made his eyes narrow at you, he knew what you were doing.

historia and sasha also got into it. they didn't care about others watching as they were both known for being good dancers. mikasa watched as she danced with armin. the two of them didn't really want to be in the middle of all that as everyone seemed to be grinding on someone.

armin watched the closeness between you and ashley. he kind of wished it was him as he hadn't gotten the chance at all to dance with you. eren glanced around and caught sight of armin. the entire night you two hadn't been close, either someone was with you or he was off somewhere.

towards the end of the song eren decided to be a ‘wing man.’ he cut in, taking ashley from you and telling you to go get another partner. ashley giggled at you two bickering and how “god forbid i dance a little with one of my girlfriends.”

mikasa had wandered off as well, wanting a drink and feeling slightly over-stimulated so that left armin alone. in the time that eren had left connie he had found some other girls to dance with. he was in a dream as he had them both dancing in front of him, entertaining him.

armin slowly approached you as you pouted your lips at eren dancing with ashley. he took your waist as bandz a make her dance by juicy j started playing and you went along with it. he gave eren a quick glance as he winked at him, thanking him.

the two of you danced as you took this chance to talk. you’d only seen each other when you first arrived and upstairs before getting separated. the thing that said was on your mind.

armin followed your moves as he watched you intently. you were unpredictable sometimes. it always kept him on his toes but he sometimes hated he didn't know what you were thinking. he’d seen floch on you the whole night and didn’t know if you’d actually stay at the party until it eventually got shut down.

your eyes watched him before you opened your mouth, “what were you doing in the bathroom?” it was an innocent question, there was no indication of you accusing him of anything.

he met your eyes before getting closer to your ear. his breath was warm against your skin as he let out a nervous laugh, “i was kinda throwing up my guts. the guys had me chugging alcohol and i got sick.. im pretty sure someone heard me and i got embarrassed.”

letting out an airy laugh, “so you got sick from alcohol and then when i see you again you're outside doing keg stands? you’re not real.” you hit his chest lightly at his ridiculousness. that explained why that guy heard things from the bathroom and why armin was so dazed after.

armin saw that you’d taken his excuse without question. you seemed to think he couldn't or wouldn't ever lie to you. he felt bad. how is it that you can take things with a grain of salt and not overthink? he wished he could learn your ways.

the two of you held eye contact while dancing. the sea of people seemed to fade as it was you two again. it took you both back to the night it started. the night that changed everything and it could've been for the worst but it didn't.

…

the party had shifted to outside, the house was almost bursting at its seams. at this point the party was at its peak; people were, in other words, tweaking. it was so loud you could barely hear your thoughts.

people joined in on keg stands and just wandered around the yard as they stayed away from the ledge of the pool. the talking went silent as the music was cut. some assumed it was the party being shut down but it was far from that.

a couple of people were standing on the roof of the house and were shouting about jumping into the pool. you tried to put names to faces as you recognized a few pledges, frat bros, and… marco and porco? nobody knew what they were doing up there but knowing marco he’d have to pull a stunt tonight. porco was just up to no good when he was out in public.

the people from below yelled, encouraging their risky behavior. all everyone could do was watch as some of the guys had second thoughts. porco took their hesitation as a sign for him to do something and he did. he took his shirt off before he ran off the roof and dove straight into the pool.

the people surrounding were silent as they waited for him to emerge and as soon as he did he let out a yell that made everyone join in as well. his stunt was a ripple effect as marco and the other guys followed.

jean watched while standing with pieck, colt, and the girl from before, “there he goes.” he let out a playful sigh as they watched porco and marco wrestle in the water.

before the music cut on floch made a final announcement, “if you wanna get wet, strip!! no shirt allowed in my pool!!” as soon as he finished the yard erupted with girls and guys peeling off their shirts as f**kin problems by asap rocky blasted.

people were jumping in and causing massive splashes of water. girls without shirts and some without bras were hanging off the ledge. guys enjoyed the view as they tried to show off their physiques.

you and a few of your friends had already started taking off your tops. approaching the ledge of the pool you contemplated if you should jump or just sit but that was short lived. historia and ymir both grabbed you and threw you in before you knew it. they jumped in after and the rest of the people around you did as well.

the chaos died down a little as people realized there were topless girls wandering around the house and yard. people mingled with each other and the rest stayed in the water splashing around or just having fun with randoms.

eren was spotted helping ashley float in the water as he had to fix his reputation of being a weak swimmer. they were on the other side of the pool watching pieck and porco try to see who could touch the bottom of the pool the fastest.

jean was sitting on some beach chairs with marco and colt. colt was dry while he handed towels to jean and marco to dry off. jean and colt were probably questioning how he got on the roof and who convinced him and porco to jump. they soon found out they both did it for the thrill of it.

sasha and mikasa decided to sit by the ledge as their feet dipped into the water. connie was shirtless as he brought drinks to all three of them. they were taking a moment to relax as they were probably half dead from the music and noise.

yelena, zeke, and onyakapon were spotted by the keg talking to floch. they were drinking as they laughed and joked about random stuff. they were all drying off from the pool water and slightly shivering at the cold beer and breeze.

you had no idea where historia and ymir were. they threw you in and you saw them not too long ago but they seemed to disappear. that wasn't too uncommon though, they probably ran off somewhere or left.

you had gotten tired of swimming as you sat on the ledge. your actions mimicked connie, mikasa, and sasha as you let your legs soak in the pool water while you just watched. as you people watched you saw armin swimming up to you.

he held onto the ledge next to you as he kept himself afloat in the water. he looked up at you after pushing his hair out of his face. the water made it fall in his face and made him temporarily blind.

he gave you a look as he stared into your eyes as he shyly asked, “you still coming tonight?”

you tilted your head at his tone, he seemed nervous in a way, “yea, why wouldn't i?” your leg kicked up water in his direction at the dumb question.

“i dont know.. making sure.” he turned away from the water as he let out a mumbled excuse.

“you know i’d never bail on you.” you once again kicked water at him at his, also, dumb excuse.

you giggled to yourself watching him fight the water but he retaliated. he pulled himself a little higher out of the water as he grabbed you by your arms. he pulled you back into the water causing you to let out a surprised yelp.

2:49 am, outside

you and armin had been sitting on the curb a block away from the party for a while now. the two of you waited close together for your ride to come. his arm was wrapped around your shoulders as you both watched the commotion in the streets. you held a cigarette you were smoking in your hand.

you both opted for an irish goodbye. it wasn’t that uncommon especially with a party that packed. the music and people could still be heard as the party spilled out into the streets. the police would surely soon show up. tonight was just the beginning of the school year to come.

the liquor and weed were wearing off but you both were pretty buzzed. he traced circles on your shoulder as mr. brightside by the killers echoed in the streets. your head fell on his shoulder as you watched the sky. the stars were barely visible with the bright street lights.

armin felt your breathing slow as you leaned on him. he shuffled to a more comfortable position for you before asking, “you falling asleep?”

you didn't respond as you took a hit, just shook your head lightly, “tonight was fun, im really happy right now.” his breath matched yours as you mimicked the circles he drew on your arms against his leg.

“it was fun, im sorry im taking you home so early.”

“i dont mind, im sorta happy to be leaving with you tonight.” you said it like it was nothing, there was no hesitation in your voice that showed you were nervous.

armin’s stomach did flips as he nodded his head. before he could add anything the car arrived. you put your almost finished cigarette out on the curb. he got up first, offering you his hand. you took it and got to your feet. the finished bud was thrown into a trash can nearby. neither of you let go as he opened the door and let you slide into the back seat first.

as the car took you, you rested your head against the glass window and watched the houses and trees pass you by. he sat on the other side watching the road through the windshield. both of your hands rested in the middle seat holding each other gently. you rolled down your window as a courtesy since you both didn't want to stink up the car.

his thumb traced shapes into your skin as he lowly hummed along to songs on the radio. he glanced over at you every now and then making sure you didn't look sick. the two of you had a scent of liquor, weed, and cigarettes mixed together.

armin was so different when he wasn’t around those people. you couldn't quite understand why he'd been acting different the whole night but all that mattered was he was his true self with you. that's all you cared about.

you took your eyes off the passing trees as you looked over at him. he watched the road ahead diligently as the shadows from passing lights shifted on his face. his hair was messy from the pool but it fit him so naturally. you could tell he’d had a long day from how low his eyes hung, or maybe that was a combination of weed and alcohol.

as you watched he caught you staring. his hand tightened slightly around yours as he tugged it a little, signaling you to come closer. his hand never left yours as you scooted into the middle and leaned against him once more.

you put one of your legs on his lap as you got comfortable. it was a bad habit you couldn't seem to get rid of. sometimes you figured it bothered people but some appreciated your physical display of trust.

armin’s other hand that remained empty went to your leg and held it in place. he wanted to be as close as possible. the closeness made your skin slightly sweat against each other but neither of you minded. your head rested against his shoulder as the both of you looked at one another.

your empty hand went to his face and he leaned into your touch. he closed his eyes as his face got closer to yours. you pecked the side of his mouth and followed it with a kiss on his jaw. he opened his eyes once your lips left his skin and stared at you with this look. the taste of cigarettes on your lips intoxicated him.

his eyes hung low and seemed to shine even in the dimness of the car back seat. he leaned in more causing some hair to fall in front of his eyes. you used your hand to push it back and hold onto the side of his neck. this time you deepened the kiss as you pulled him in.

your hand stayed on his neck as he pulled you more onto his lap. the kiss wasn’t like it was before, the two of you were more gentle. his hand got closer to your butt as he pulled you closer to him. armin let out low whimpers as your thumb ran up and down his adam's apple. the hum of his reaction caused it to vibrate under your touch.

the two of you were shifting closer to each other before the driver cleared his throat, “ahem, we’re here.” you both pulled apart at his voice. armin looked slightly embarrassed as he nodded his head and apologized to the man. as you and him stepped out of the car and said thank you once more the man gave a small smile before saying to stay safe.

armin’s arm wrapped around your waist as the two of you walked to the front door of his apartment building. the walk to his front door was quiet as it was late and people were asleep. he fumbled with his keys a little before finding the right one and opening the door.

he led you to his room and sat on his bed as you put your things in his dresser. you sat next to him before laying on your back. he copied your motions and laid next to you. the two of you faced each other as he kissed your neck softly. your hand buried itself in his hair as he reached for the bottom of your shirt.

he slid it off you as you laid in your bra and he went for your pants next. as he undid the buttons you took the opportunity to take his shirt off. the both of you sat up as he shimmied you out of your bottoms. he took in your body as he continued to press kisses on your burning skin.

your hands ran up and down his abs as both of you took your time. the tension was there but there was no hurry; it was just you two alone. he laid you back on the bed as he got on top. his touch was precise as he went lower and lower. he was holding onto finishing where you both left off.

10:23 am, armin's apartment

you woke up in armin's bed the next day. you were in one of his shirts with only your underwear. the light shone in through the blinds as you tossed around a little trying to adjust to the brightness. you could feel the warmth of his body radiating in the sheets next to you.

the birds chirping outside seemed to force your eyes open and come out from under the sheets. your back was facing him as you rolled onto your side to see if armin was awake yet. he came into view and was.

he was wearing his glasses as he read a book he had on his nightstand. his hair was a mess from bed head and he had no shirt. he saw you shift and watched you from his peripheral, “good morning, you're finally up.” you could still hear the morning rasp in his voice. he set his book down as he stretched in bed.

“how long have you been up?” you scooted closer to him as he rested his arms behind his head.

he wrapped one of his arms around you as you nestled into him, “like, uh, an hour? i don't know, i just stayed in bed.”

“ohh, i thought you’d be showering or something already. i know you have like a whole morning routine.”

“yeaaa, but i didn't want you to wake up to me gone from bed.”

you let out a yawn as you nodded your head. he’d waited just for you. the two of you stayed in bed for a while just talking before deciding to eat something. both of your heads were pounding and thirsty.

armin got out of bed as he headed for the kitchen to grab water bottles. you took this as a chance to fix his bed and clean up the clothes that were scattered on the floor from last night. he came back and tried to convince you he’d do it himself but you were almost done.

the two of you then headed to the bathroom to brush your teeth. armin had already had a toothbrush for you; all your friends had toothbrushes in each other's homes for sleepovers or whenever. the morning had been pretty decent with how wild floch's party was.

he asked what you wanted to eat and you didn't have a clue. all you knew was that neither of you felt like cooking so ordering was the solution. his phone was on the nightstand but it was dead so he called from your phone.

“do you think it's lowkey big to order wingstop for breakfast?” you questioned as you laid on the living room couch, arrested development played on the tv.

your legs were on armin’s lap as he laughed, “no it's like nutritious, protein and grains. this is actually healthy.”

“you're right, we deserve a nice, healthy, filling breakfast.”

the food was going to take a while to arrive so you decided to take a shower first. armin said he’d go after you since he was going to have to deal with texts and calls from guys at the frat. his disappearance would probably get him talked to but he didn't mind.

…

you had been in the shower for a while as armin went back to his room. he plugged his phone in and waited for it to charge up before he checked his notifications. after a while he started checking his messages and missed calls. his eyes landed on the name, “annie”. he had 1 missed call from her at 3:39 am.

he stood there thinking about why she’d call. she never called him anymore, she only ever texted now. he hesitated for a second but he clicked her name to return her call. it barely rang before it went straight to voicemail.

he opted to text her right after, “you called?”

her message came after, “i wanted to see you last night.” she never responded this quickly.

“sorry for not picking up.” armin sat on his bed as he watched her type. he eagerly waited for her to text back.

what followed was annie just thumbs upping his message and responding, “all chill.” that was the end of that conversation.

armin turned his phone off as he saw he hadn't gotten any verbal lashing from floch or eren yet. he thought about last night now that he was sober. he felt icky about how he was fronting the entire night. it was embarrassing to think that people witnessed him go from a typical frat bro to a wallflower. that wasn't him at all and he felt like everyone could tell, which made it worse.

he buried his hands in his face as he realized annie also almost called him reiner. that made him feel sick. he hated it but he knew that was someone he was trying to emulate. her face as she saw him ‘switch’ made him groan but what could he do. she came onto him as she saw him emulate these guys.

thinking about her and the call he thought about what could have unfolded last night. if they hadn't been interrupted in the bathroom, if he’d picked up her call, if he hadn’t asked you to come over. his head was pounding. he didn’t want to think about deciding between you or annie coming home with him last night. he didn't know what to think, he knew he couldn't decide.

he threw himself onto his bed as he tried to clear his mind. the decision still lingered in his brain alongside memories of last night. he laid there for a minute before you called from the bathroom, “armin! can i get a towel?”

he sat up before remembering you were here. you had spent the night. you were in his shower. he got to his feet before responding, “yea, i got it.”

“kk, the door's unlocked.”

he grabbed a spare towel from a small closet in the hallway before he stopped in front of the bathroom door. he could hear the water running. he opened the door and saw your figure through the curtain. he knew what your body looked like already but there was something about just a curtain being the thin barrier between you both that had an allure.

he gazed at you through the curtain for a little before he realized what he was in there for, “h-hey, i got your towel, i'll leave it here on the toilet.”

as he finished setting it down you poked your head out from behind the curtain. the both of you stared at each other as he had a flustered look on his face. armin looked down as he realized his face was heating up more, “sorry.”

you just giggled at his reaction, “dont be sorry.” you watched as he stood there looking at the floor, not knowing what to do.

“armin..” your voice sounded playful as he still didn’t look up, trying to be respectful.

“yea..”

“come here.” at your request he first hesitated before walking closer to the shower. he stood next to the sink and glanced at his face realizing his blush hadn’t settled.

“can you help me wash my back?” you watched his face as his mind processed your question.

armin pushed his hair behind his ears trying to focus, “are you sure you want me in here?” he was genuinely wondering.

“why wouldn't i? come in.”

at that he turned to take his clothes off. your head retreated back behind the curtain as he slowly took off his pants. you could hear the sound of his glasses being set down on the shelves behind the toilet.

he quietly entered through the same side your head was prior. he was shocked to be facing you face to face. it all made him nervous. you both stared at each other as he seemed to not know how to shower. you took initiative like it was natural and turned your back to him so he could help you as you asked.

he slowly rubbed soap down your skin as he hesitated to touch you in any way that could be considered inappropriate. you were squeamish from his touch that seemed to be tickling you. his touch became more relaxed as he realized you didn't mind.

the two of your bare bodies were so close. you and armin had seen each other before but only in the aspect of hooking up. this was something different. there were no touches leading into more, these were just touches of people who were comfortable and cared for each other. the closeness wrapped between you two felt warm and like a blanket.

the heat radiating off both of your bodies matched each other as you both showered like normal. you changed spots as you washed his hair for him. the two of you stared at one another as no words were exchanged. armin closed his eyes as he turned his back to you. he wanted to make it easier for you to do his hair.

as he relaxed a creeping sense of dread started to fill him. his mind still lingered on annie. he thought about the fact she never wanted or liked showering together. she always set boundaries of how close people could get to her. she really liked her space.

things were so different. why could she never let him in when they were in a relationship? you were so willing to show your emotions and display how you felt through actions. his eyes remained closed as he felt his eyes start to water.

things truly were different between you two versus him and annie. he hadn’t known someone could give him reassurance in such small ways. with her he could only gaslight himself into thinking he was being dramatic and shove his feelings deep down. armin went back to the question that was the root of it all; you or annie.

his eyes shed tears as he hated this. he hadn’t cried the entire time they've been broken up. he couldn't hide from the tsunami of emotions he forced to hide behind distractions. this wasn’t in his control right now and it made his throat grow sore.

he was so bare right now. his hair was being washed as he acknowledged and came to terms with everything. he didn't cry but this was the closest he's come. seeing people for who they were was his ultimate downfall right now. he wished for ignorance as he tried to grasp for some lingering feeling of bliss but that wasn't possible now.

author's note:

hi guyssss this is my

last chpt for this arc !!!

i just wanna say thank

you for supporting my work

and i'll be on hiatus til further notice !!

more is yet to come thank you for

5:57 pm, the house

the summer was over before you knew it. school was starting up again next week. to commemorate the break being over, armin and eren’s frat was throwing a party. the president, floch, was going all out, especially with having connie promote it.

armin and eren were spending the whole day at the frat house helping floch set up and organize. everyone else gathered at your house to get ready and plan. connie was jumping around, excited to be at his first rager of sophomore year.

jean was in the bathroom, currently fixating on his hair. he had a cowlick in the front that he swore decided to act up whenever he was going out. he was left alone in there while he tried his best; if he needed help he knew to call for connie and he’d use his magic touch.

marco was already setting up the pregame. he was in the kitchen, ransacking the cabinets to see what he was working with. he had a knack for making a mean jungle juice and never shared his secret to it. he was ready to give everyone a strong taste of liquid courage.

mikasa and you were getting ready in your room. the two of you worked on your hair and makeup while im not sorry by dean blasted from your tv. mikasa sat at your vanity, fixing her hair while you sat on the floor. you sometimes preferred doing your makeup on the floor since you got to sit close to the full-length mirror next to the vanity.

your room turned into the prep room as sasha raided your closet. sasha was looking for clothes and anything she’d want to borrow, showing you and mikasa pieces as well. she was deep in there, studying everything.

ashley walked into your room carrying what seemed like fifty pounds of clothes. she added to the pile by setting a ball of clothing from her closet onto your bed. sasha and her traded spots as they analyzed potential outfits for tonight.

“mika, what about this shirt?” ashley held up the top she found. mikasa looked at it through the mirror’s reflection as you and sasha also looked.

“its cute, but like i don’t wanna stretch out the shirt with my boobs, it looks like a tight fit.” she glanced down at her chest while continuing to do her eyeliner.

you took a glance at mikasa’s boobs as you gave your opinion, “it'd be an honor to have your titties stretch out my shirt, i think i'd frame it.”

“yea lowkey your boobs are like the best ive ever seen.” ashley added, also stealing a glance at mikasa while she searched for more clothes.

“you think? they’re so heavy sometimes.”

“can we all take a moment to admire mikasa and even have her offer to let us take a feel?” sasha gave mikasa a devious smirk while giggling. ashley and you nodded eagerly, joining in sasha’s giggling.

mikasa rolled her eyes playfully, scoffing, “yall are so gay.”

after searching for shirts, you and ashley switched positions. she was doing her hair at the vanity while you tried to find something to change into. mikasa was now doing sasha's eyeliner as well. they both sat at the edge of your bed, mikasa on sasha’s lap, giving their opinions on things you tried.

“oh ashley,” mikasa called to get the focused girl's attention.

she replied, now doing her makeup, “yea?”

“whats up with you and eren?”

“OH MY GOD—” you yelled excitedly as you’d been waiting for it to be brought up.

sasha joined in, “yea, what's going on?”

“aye aye aye, let's relax pleaseeee?”

“nah dont relax, you haven't told us anything.” sasha pressed ashley.

“well, me and him—”

before ashley could finish, connie barged into the room unannounced. he was followed by marco and jean as they walked around the room, taking a look at random stuff.

“whats up?” sasha opened her eyes at their arrival.

“wanted to see what y'all were up to.” jean mumbled under his breath nonchalantly.

connie settled in against the vanity as he watched ashley curl her lashes. jean took a seat on the floor since your bed was already occupied by clothes, sasha, and mikasa. marco leaned against the closet door, taking in everyone's outfits.

“ok so we do want something.” marco let out a chuckle as you all rolled your eyes at the same time.

“oh my god i knew it.” ashley let out an exaggerated sigh to join in with the groans everyone seemed to emit. you were waiting to see what they were going to ask for.

connie rolled his eyes, “ok ok relaxxx, its deadass nothing crazy, we just need to come to a decision.”

you nodded to let them say their piece or ask for whatever it was.

after you nodded, marco, jean, and connie all started talking at once about outfits. they’d been debating who got to wear a shirt since they all wanted to. this caused the shirt to be shown, which had everyone but the trio groan.

“aint nothing special about that fuck ass shirt.” ashley said in an unamused tone.

mikasa just shook her head at the big deal they made it seem to be, “no deadass.”

“bruh” the three of them let out a monotone response.

“not gonna lie, just bring y'all's clothes here and we can all just play irl dress to impress.” you decided to invite them since they seemed to be having the same issues as you and the girls.

jean’s mouth fell into an ‘o’ shape as he put his fist in front of it, “wait, thats kinda smart.”

“bitch”

the three of them scurried out of the room to start grabbing clothes from their wardrobes. when they entered, they added onto the pile on your bed.

…

everyone soon made their way downstairs with their chosen outfits. it was pregame and plan time. it was the same as usual; scope out the scenery for a few minutes, then everyone parts, if things get crazy meet in the back, and lastly get wasted.

you all sipped marco’s jungle juice while thinking about what the first party of the semester would be like. they talked about who might be there and who they’re excited to see. you thought about armin. not having seen him all day and not being able to call him made you slightly worry about him.

rushing the frat seemed to be hell for him and eren both, especially since armin wasn’t what most would consider a frat bro. you also thought if you’d get any time with him tonight. floch might keep you entertained the whole night if you didn't manage to slip away. you wouldn't want armin seeing that.

while you all questioned marco on what he might've put into his juice, a phone ringing interrupted the conversation. everyone searched their pockets, looking for who it could be—it was mikasa. her screen flashed with the name, “elen.”

she changed eren’s contact to that a couple years ago when she heard how his mom pronounced his name with her accent. she loved it and terrorized ‘elen’ with it on the regular.

she put the phone on speaker, already knowing how loud eren would be.

“YOOOO” was heard from the other end of the phone.

a quieter, “klk klk” followed.

“KLK ARMIN PAPI” connie and sasha hollered back, dying at armin’s perfect pronunciation.

“yoo” “wassup” “hi hi” “yurrr” “halloo”

the rest of you exchanged greets as you all started asking questions about how things were going.

“yooo, it's already getting crazy, floch just gave us the craziest speech on some scream queens shit, talking about how we gotta go crazy or he’ll personally find a way to make us all wish we never joined the frat.” armin let out a small laugh after. you could all imagine it, floch promised to make his presidency something to remember and tonight he had to make his breakthrough.

marco asked, “what does that even mean?”

“i don't know but i kinda don't really wanna find out.” there was some seriousness lining eren’s words as you could hear his voice go up a pitch.

they all talked for a while, asking how soon you'll be heading out and what they’d been up to all day. as you all sipped and exchanged words, your phone vibrated with a text. it was armin.

arminnn

you excited?


yes yes
you excited?

yea kinda nervous too


why
dont be nervy you'll see us soon


ik
im kinda like
idk
jittery?


is floch fear mongering yall?
we can get mikasa to beat his ass yk
hes lwk scared of her


no no it's alr
im just nervy to see yall
see you yk


awe i miss you too armin arlert


whyd you say my whole gov
i dont think i miss you anymore

fuck me ig🫩
wait ew no
you like that freak


i like your big heart as well

wait thats sweet
wait no
my heart is where my titties are
freaky ahh bitch


you caught me
are you mad at me mommy
are you gonna hit me 🤤
noooo plssss dont punish me

you rlly know the way to my heart🥹
i'll start hitting you more often


REALLY???
anyways i miss you too
i hope to at least to see you


hope?
you gon be too busy?


ppl love you too much
once theyre around you they dont
leave you alone

__________

his final text made your eyes squint as you read it. you were listening in and out of the conversation as you heard floch suddenly yell from the other end.

“C’MON LADIES, PEOPLE ARE ALREADY AT THE DOOR!!”

everyone laughed as armin and eren went silent on the other end.

“lets go before floch flips his shit,” armin’s voice whispered with a slight hint of fear at floch’s sudden warning.

eren hurriedly followed as they could be heard shuffling downstairs where other voices and worst behavior by drake playing could be heard, “yea, we'll see yall soon, bye love yall.”

“bye bye” “love yalllll” “peace” “see yall soon” “buh-byeee”

the phone hung up and you all finished your cups. the rides were being called as everyone made sure they had their stuff. everyone got the last of their business settled before heading out. you went to the bathroom, knowing you probably wouldn’t find a clean one tonight.

you hadn’t responded to armin’s last text. it was too late anyways; he’d probably be busy right now. what did he mean by that? he knew that you loved to party, but that didn't change the fact he was the one you chose to spend your time with.

he’d never mentioned that before, and it seemed like something small, but it still meant something. the mention of it reminded you of how some assumed you were ‘easy’ because you liked to have fun. was he trying to insinuate? maybe this is what he meant when he said he felt protective. you didn’t want to make him relive what annie put him through; you wanted to make him feel comfortable even if it might be at your own expense.

as you washed your hands, you looked at yourself in the mirror, analyzing your appearance. were you doing too much with hair, makeup, and outfit? you couldn't have, it's a party; everyone wants to look their best. that comment made you wonder if armin saw you as someone who fished for attention. it wasn’t your fault people seemed to linger around you. you just liked to live in the moment and enjoy it.

exiting the bathroom, you walked downstairs to see everyone spread out on the couch, waiting on you. they grabbed their things as they assured you had what you needed one final time. the seven of you headed out the door to the big minivan parked on the street.

you walked at the back of the group with jean as you whispered to him, “hey.. you think im doing too much?” motioning to your appearance.

he took in how you looked at a glance before responding, “if you’re scared of people being creeps you know i got you. if someone starts bothering you, i'll keep my arm around you the whole night.” you didn’t respond as you studied his face.

jean finally looked at you as he tilted his head towards you. he sucked his teeth as he took in the look you had on your face, “look.. dont let some bum ass bitches ruin your night just cus you look good.” you gave him a small smile as you interlocked arms with him. he rolled his eyes as he held onto you as well. he was the sweetest even when he wasn’t trying.

you all stuffed yourselves into the car as the driver looked at everyone through the rear view mirror. “that’s a lot of people. where yall headed?”

“a friend’s place.”

9:49 pm, frat house

you guys were dropped off at the corner of the block so the driver wouldn’t have a hard time driving around so many people. knowing floch’s parties, there were probably people already scattered on the sidewalk, leaking onto the street. the walk wasn’t too bad, especially since you were already running into people you all knew.

a few houses down from the frat, there was a line already formed. plain jane by asap ferg could be heard blasting from the house as the lights changed colors and voices could be heard. everyone seemed to be waiting to be let in by the frat 'security.’ it was just two freshman pledges that were put on this duty. they were taking it seriously, probably because of the fear and passion floch’s speech had invoked.

your group walked up to the door, cutting the entire line. people groaned and mumbled under their breaths at the rudeness, but it had to be done if you wanted to get in anytime soon.

the ‘security’ scanned all of you while almost only looking at you, mikasa, sasha, and ashley. the four of you stared back before connie blocked their view.

“you know us, let us in.” his voice was smooth as he demanded, with a teasing look in his eyes.

the two boys seemed to be knocked out of their daze as they begrudgingly nodded. it was that easy, especially when you know the frat president personally. they opened the front lawn gate as you all walked past the hoard of people.

the crowd groaned and complained louder as the interaction lasted less than a second and all seven of you were already on your way in. as you climbed up the stairs, you saw jean and sasha in the corner of your eye flexing on the people. they mimicked crying faces as they laughed at each other.

as soon as the front door opened, you were hit with an intense wave of liquor and bodies dancing on each other. money longer by lil uzi vert filled your ears as you all walked into the house and felt your heart rate spike a little. your body grew warmer as you greeted mutuals you passed by. parties were something you missed.

the regular group of other frat guys seemed to swarm the entire place. they greeted connie with whistles as they nodded at the rest of the group's presence. you made your way further into the house as more people passed by. sasha, you, and connie seemed to get your names said the most since you were known around campus.

everyone made it to the kitchen to meet with eren and armin as planned. they both seemed already pretty tipsy and buzzing with energy; floch sure knew how to get his chapter amped up.

eren’s hair was pulled back slightly, revealing his alcohol-flushed ears. he came in for a group hug as he pulled armin in as well. he wasn’t wearing his glasses and it seemed to change his presence in a way.

everyone talked and greeted each other while engaging in random conversation. you were all having a good time, especially with how soon school was starting. as you offered everyone cups, you poured and couldn’t help but focus on armin.

he seemed different. he was still himself but not really. he was more casual in a way. his posture was different—it was more open. he wasn't being his usual self; it was like he was someone else.

maybe it was the no glasses or even the alcohol. he seemed to be acting sort of like his frat bros in a way. that wasn't it though, this ‘mask’ of his reminded you of something, or someone. you couldn't put your finger on it exactly.

everyone's attention was soon captured by an energetic floch. he greeted you all, dapping up and hugging the boys and you while just dapping up the rest of the girls. he gave marco his usual line, “hey party animal.” marco smirked at the name. after that he found his place to stand and join the conversation.

he rested between you and eren, wrapping his arms on both of your shoulders. every so often while talking he would throw small smirks in both of your directions while talking nicely. he openly flirted with eren and you as it was in his nature with you two.

ashley couldn’t help but side-eye eren and floch. eren gave her a pleading look trying to convince her it wasn’t his doing. armin’s eyes also glanced in your direction, but nothing was said. he seemed not to care, putting the three of you out of his line of vision.

the moment interaction didn't last long as floch was waved to in the distance. he parted from you and eren while grabbing connie along with him. he said he had someone to introduce him to. with that, you all officially went onto your own activities.

10:58 pm

the party was already full of people. there was a lack of air, taken over by the heat radiating off everyone's body. these days by mike stud played loudly, making the whole house shake—or maybe it was because the house was overflowing with people. they all seemed in sync as they yelled out, “but you can have her back, she asks a million questions… like, what's next, what's that, what's up? i just wanna chill, drink, smoke, fuck cus god damn that body's goals as fuck. somehow you hot as hell but still cold as fuck. you know the deal, you know what's up. you ain't the only one, you knew that!”

there seemed to be a smoke film covering the dimmed lights, giving you a feeling of nostalgia. you hadn’t been out in a while; you’d been working almost all summer.

there was an array of people here tonight. you and your friends all drifted off to who knows where—you’d find each other eventually. people came up to you as you walked by, holding a red cup. a lot of people hadn’t seen you all break but still greeted you like they’d spent the last few months with you.

as you conversed with a few people, you felt an arm wrap gently around your waist while weight pressed against your head. you were caught slightly off guard as a head rested against your shoulder as well.

before you could fully process it, a familiar male voice came from behind you: “let's get off the poor girl. she’s gonna pee her pants, y’all are so scary.”

you looked up to see what the weight was—it was porco. he lazily looked down at you with a small smirk. turning to see whose hand was involved, you noticed it was pieck, her face pressed against your shoulder with a similarly lazy smirk.

the voice belonged to colt. he gave a slight apology for interrupting your conversation. the four of you chatted as you made your way to the kitchen, where you and porco decided to mix and match drinks. you hadn’t seen them much this summer; everyone seemed busy with their adult lives, but they were as friendly as ever.

pieck joined other people doing shots, downing them like water. she was an interesting force at a party. you’d been buzzed since arriving—marco knew how to set up a good pregame. colt mentioned wanting to smoke to unwind a little tonight. the two of you left pieck with porco, who climbed onto a counter and poured liquor into people’s mouths. it hadn’t been long, but they were already up to their usual shenanigans.

you and colt walked to the sliding door at the end of the kitchen. he kept an eye on you while you led, maneuvering you through the crowd with a loose grip on your shoulders to make sure you didn’t get shoved.

you stood outside smoking before a girl approached, clearly trying to feel out colt while he thought it was a normal conversation. snickering, you came up with an excuse, spotting armin on some lawn chairs. you shot colt a smirk and mentioned that armin was single and had a little brother he cared for a lot.

armin sat on the lawn chairs smoking alone, having escaped his frat brothers. usually, he had a smoking buddy, but tonight he was alone while others grouped up. you made yourself comfortable next to him and asked for a hit.

armin was surprised by your sudden appearance before you nudged your head in colt’s direction. his mouth made an ‘o’ shape before he snickered. the two of you shared a spliff while trying to read the lips of nearby people.

a sense of nostalgia hit both of you—it was just like connie's party, a light memory from the start of the summer. you felt a sense of deja vu. armin was different tonight. that night, he spent half the party enduring annie breaking up with him.

before she even broke up, he had seen her being touchy with bertolt and reiner. that’s why he never made it to the basement. she’d been slow to reply to calls and messages for hours, even days, and the first time he saw her, she was warmer with those two than with her own boyfriend.

armin wanted to shove those memories far away. he focused on you. it was just the two of you again. he’d been waiting to see you all day and hadn’t gotten you alone in a while. he missed your warmth.

the two of you shared a spliff. as armin went to pass it to you, he held it near your mouth instead. you took a hit, eyes locked on his, reading the neediness in them—a look you were accustomed to.

one of your fingers hooked onto a belt loop of his jeans. you pulled him slightly, signaling what you wanted. he took a hit himself, his other hand grazing your knee. you both inhaled deeply one last time before getting up.

making your way inside, armin placed his arm around your shoulders as you walked through the crowd. stick talk by future played while the two of you made your journey upstairs quietly. nobody knew what either of you were up to; he just seemed like a friend making sure you didn’t get lost in the sea of people.

he was too relaxed. his energy felt different, like he was someone else. the ease made you comfortable but also left you questioning why he seemed to flip a switch. the way he guided you upstairs felt rehearsed, like he’d studied someone else.

the two of you made it quietly to a spare room. as soon as the door closed, your arms wrapped around his shoulders, his back hitting the door with a thud as he supported both of your weight. your scent enveloped him completely. you were all he saw, all he felt, all he tasted.

being pulled together made him feel something different—beyond crossed. his eyes seemed blown out from the weed and alcohol in his system, plus the position you two were in.

as soon as the door closed your arms wrapped around his shoulders. his back hit the door with a thud as he supported both of your weight. your scent seemed to envelope him completely. you were all he saw right now, all he felt, all he tasted. 

being pulled together only made him feel something different, he felt beyond crossed. his eyes seemed to be completely blown out from the weed and alcohol in his system, plus the position you two were in right now. 

armin put his thigh in between your legs as your hands ran over his body. armin arm wrapped around your waist as his other hand slid under your shirt. you let out a strangled gasp as he applied pressure with his thigh.

both of your body's grinded against each other as you hands seemed to hold onto anything. one of your hands found their place in his hair pulling it every now and then while the other ran against the waist band of his pants. your hand trailed up and down his happy trail as armin let out muffled groans.

your were getting more dizzy as you ran out of air. armin seemed to as well. as the two of you caught your breaths he kept placing kisses on your jaw and neck. he forced your legs to wrap around his waist while he lifted you making the air leave your lungs again. he softly laid you on the bed as his hands trailed your waist. 

armin hovered over you leaving small marks on your waist he let out a whimper, “i need you so bad, please.” you found you way to the edge of the bed and sat up as armin seemed to sigh as being pulled away. 

the distance between you two closed again as you kissed down his chest and abs. you could feel his abs tensing at your touch he was taking sharp breaths as you unzipped his pants. 

you pulled him closer by his belt loops as you felt him growing bigger. he moved you a little further onto the bed as he crawled on top of you. his hand unclipped your bra as the other squeezed your chest. armin didn’t know where to start but the metal on his tongue seemed to memorize your every curve. he wanted to admire how you looked. he wanted to please you any way he could. 

as he placed one final kiss on lips he got off the bed. you watched him stand at the end as he pulled your legs close to the edge. he gripped your thighs as he kissed your waist. you let out soft breaths as he started to unbutton your pants. 

in the middle of your moment there were three loud bangs at the door. armin let out an annoyed groan as the two of you started to scramble. you fixed his hair as he buttoned up his pants and made himself presentable. he walked towards the door as you hid behind it, hoping not to be seen.

armin opened the door slightly as he hid his lower body behind the door; it was just jean. before armin could talk, he was already talking, “where’s y/n? i seen yall together.” he didn’t seem to be investigating but more so concerned where you were. you were prone to disappearing for the night and ending up in places you probably shouldn’t be.

armin responded in the same tone he had before. he sounded more laid back and there was an unnatural bass in his voice again. “i dont know, maybe the bathroom? she wanted me to walk her there or something.”

jean went silent for a few seconds as he checked out armin. he scanned his face and his stance before asking, “are you good? what's up with you?”

armin’s persona seemed to falter for a second before he saved himself, “yea, just needed a minute, thought i was greening out.”

“are you ok? i can always stay-” jean’s voice filled with worry as he pushed the door slightly.

armin quickly cut off the idea as he kept the door firm, “nah, nah, it's fine. i just needed a minute i’ve been in this house all day.”

they both stood silent for a few seconds as jean studied armin’s face again. he let out a deep breath and let out a light, “i’ll catch you later then, make sure to drink water.” jean ruffled armin’s hair before his footsteps faded down the stairs.

armin closed the door as he placed his back on it. he let out a sigh of relief as he turned his head towards your direction. you came closer towards him, pausing to hover close to his face.

“that was kinda crazy.” you laughed softly as your hand found its place on his hair, trying to fix the mess jean made.

armin was still breathless from the interaction as he watched your concentrated face, “yea, can't be too careful.”

his hand traced down your arm as your hand found its way back to his face. there was a sense of nervousness filling the air between you now. jean came close to walking in on you two. at any moment someone else could do the same.

armin’s other hand fell on top of yours as he whispered, “come over.” the words left his mouth so smoothly they seemed rehearsed the way they rolled off his tongue. his words carried a light air; he sounded almost sober.

your other hand found its way to the collar of his shirt as you toyed with it, “what about eren? also don't you gotta stay here tonight?”

“eren’s supposed to stay as well. i'll sneak out, tell them i wasn’t feeling good.” his finger hooked onto the belt loops of your pants, pulling you a little closer.

“...kk” you pulled him by his collar, mouth hovering over his.

you two shared one last kiss. both of your lips collided as you exchanged an open-mouth exchange. he was hungry and seemed to want to stay in the moment. you knew if you stayed like this you wouldn't leave the room any time soon. pulling away left the both of you dazed. a single string of saliva held the connection between your lips. you licked yours as armin’s hand softly touched his lips.

you pushed yourself off the wall and opened the door slightly, sticking your head out to see if the coast was clear. armin watched you over his shoulder, quietly waiting to be told how long he should wait before leaving as well. nobody seemed to be lingering around so you signaled him to come. he paused for a second before nodding along.

armin had grown so accustomed to being left to find his own way back by annie. she’d always leave first, letting him sit alone after their encounters. she'd seemed to never willingly be in his presence unless she was getting something.

it was something so small. you held onto the hem so softly, but you already knew he’d stay close enough to not let you lose hold of it. you pulled him behind you by his shirt.

even with how you two wanted to maintain this private, you still held onto him. people from the outside couldn’t decipher what this meant, only you two. it wasn't a display but much rather a small link.

every mischievous glance over your shoulder was met with his eyes glued to you. once again it was you two in the sea of people. you were truly something else, otherworldly. he’d seen how people orbited around you and knew exactly why.

sometimes armin felt that if he got too close to you, the small island you two seemed to be on would dry up. you prove him wrong every time, but there's only so much time one can spend in the sun before they’re burned.

as soon as you two reached the bottom of the stairs, you were both separated. armin’s fellow frat bros kidnapped him as they loudly spoke of some tradition for tonight. he wrapped his arms around their shoulders as he laughed obnoxiously loud with them. his laugh seemed to be throatier as his energy shifted back to what it was at the beginning of the party.

you watched from afar as he disappeared into the crowd, surrounded by the drunk or high boys. as your eyes scanned the people around you, they caught onto a trio of tall people. they seemed to linger over everyone as they fooled around with beer bottles.

as you tried to push your way through the crowd, they noticed you and motioned you to come closer. onyakapon figured it'd be easier for him to get you since you’d be fighting for your life to get across the room. he parted the way as he gently held a hold of your waist, making sure to do all the pushing.

once making it back to yelena and zeke, you greeted all three of them properly.

zeke laughed loudly at your appearance, “yo, youre fucked.”

“what?” you were confused if they’d seen you come down with armin and could smell him on you.

“the look in your eye, high on adrenaline and fueled by weed and liquor, of course.” yelena laughed as well, pointing her cup in the direction of your face.

“it cant be that noticeable.”

“it really is.” onyakapon supported their observation.

“fuckkk, i think it's also all these people. i thrive off others' energy too lowkey."

“ok, edward cullen.” zeke snarked and let out a chuckle at his own words.

“i accept that. i want kristen stewart to touch me so bad.” you emphasized how badly you would want that.

“me too, shes so bad.”

“she doesn't like boys, im pretty.” onyakapon looked at zeke with his eyebrows furrowed as he laughed.

“but like my hair is a little past my shoulder, im fingering femboy territory.”

you faked a gagging noise, “im irritated right now, don't ever insult femboys like that ever again.”

“what do you know about femboys?” yelena questioned you jokingly as their eyes all landed on you.

“oh, what dont i know.”

11:42 pm

you finally made your way onto the dance floor. everyone seemed to be light-headed from the lack of air that was replaced by the smell of bodies grinding on each other. the lights didn’t help as they would send anyone into a seizure.

low life by future played loudly as you danced along with yelena. the longer you two danced, you both caught sight of mikasa and ashley dancing as well. they were not too far from pieck and floch. those two seemed to be having the time of their lives.

the four of them seemed to notice you and yelena as well and drew closer. she made sure to keep you in line, watching the way you moved; you always did know how to entertain others. the air between you two was barely there as she tried to now lose you in the sea of other dancing bodies.

as she was behind you, zeke and onyakapon spawned out of nowhere. they apologized before kidnapping yelena from the floor. they’d said they needed her for a potential three-man. you laughed as she groaned at their side plans but waved her off.

floch and pieck saw you had been dancing alone now and decided to have you join them. as the motto by drake started, the three of you were dancing on each other. pieck’s hands never left floch as his hands held onto the both of you.

in the midst of this entanglement, porco appeared off to the side dancing alone. she excused herself, leaving you with floch as she danced with him. she loved dancing and loved having different partners.

floch continued to dance with you, but even closer now. he kept you always an inch or two away from his body as he followed your lead. he always knew how to make you look better, and he was here for it. the two of you were in the moment that it seemed like everyone was watching.

the rhythm you two were in was soon interrupted by one of the boys from floch's chapter. he called his name in the crowd from afar. at first, floch thought it was just to hype him up, but the closer the boy got, the more frantic he sounded. he reached you and floch, causing you two to slightly part.

floch rolled his eyes at the interruption. in an annoyed tone he tried to brush off the kid, “you see me dancing with my people and choose to cut in.” his eyes stared down at the boy as he grew more frantic.

he hurriedly whispered in floch’s ear as you watched the interaction quietly. floch's eyes almost rolled to the back of his head as he was informed of a situation, it seemed.

his attention fell back onto you as he apologized, “im sorry i gotta go. i'll be back for you, my beautiful and lovely y/n.”

before floch left, he held you close before giving you a quick spin one last time. he kissed your hand as he held onto it before letting the boy lead the way through the crowd.

you let out a giggle at floch's nature before going back to dancing by yourself again. the solitude didn’t last long as a random guy approached you. he came too close for your comfort and caused you to take a step back.

he smelled like straight liquor and was persistent. you tried to turn him down with just a head shake of no, but it didn't work. he tried to dance closer to you as you felt your dancing mood fade away.

he got eye level with you, seeming to want to say or ask something, but you quickly cut him off, “i gotta take a piss.”

you walked past him and straight into the sea of people while looking for a bathroom. pushing your way through the crowd made you realize this was going to be a lot harder than you thought it would. you made it to the kitchen, scouring the area for a bathroom.

as you paced around looking, you walked past a frat bro you recognized. you stopped him in his tracks as you grabbed him by his shoulder, “hey, sorry, do you know where the bathroom is?”

he seemed taken aback at the sudden touch but soon relaxed. he pointed down a hall before saying, “i was just there, but im pretty sure there was people fuckin or something, i heard some things.” he offered to also walk you there, but you declined. right now you needed to get away from randoms.

11:29 am, the beach

today was sunny with clear skies. it seemed like the weather knew you guys were going to be at the beach all day. you hadn’t been to the beach since that one day with armin, so you were even more excited. everyone was excited today. armin and jean were the first ones to run straight into the ocean. they had already helped set up beach chairs, blankets, and umbrellas and were finally free to run wild.

ymir yelled after them, “yo, put on sunscreen! remember, yall don’t tan, yall burn!!” they ignored her warning and continued to race while pushing each other.

mikasa had started burying connie in the sand to give him a mermaid body. he kept insisting that she made sure his body was ‘tea.’ mikasa and connie were also waiting for the perfect moment to play volleyball. they were itching to get a full game going.

eren sat under an umbrella next to ashley and complained about the sand getting everywhere. he’d grown to like the beach more because of armin, but he still hated sand. ashley took the opportunity to make eren help her apply sunscreen. even if he wasn’t complaining, it wasn’t like he was going to turn her down.

historia and marco were seated next to each other. he read a book while glancing at jean every few minutes. she was helping braid sasha’s hair before anything. ymir was already knocked out on the blanket next to you.

the two of you applied sunscreen on each other before both laying down. she couldn’t help falling asleep while she tried to tan. the sun made her fall into a coma. you enjoyed the sounds of the waves as you watched jean lift armin and slam him into the water. mikasa called everybody to look at the masterpiece she’d made. you all glanced over to connie in the sand.

“what the fuck.” “i’m crying, bro.” “what is this.”

“i think you made my body a little too realistic, mika.” he had an hourglass body but had a sand dick sitting straight up in the middle of his mermaid tail. connie had a devious smile on his face as he stuck out his tongue. he posed for the pictures historia and ashley were taking on their digital cameras.

…

armin and jean came back from the water a little while later. they returned to eat some snacks and drink water. armin’s nose and cheeks were turning slightly red from the sun while jean’s back turned a similar color. that morning they had also found mikasa’s zigzag headbands and claimed them. they were perfect for keeping their hair out of their faces while they played in the water. they were matching with their hair accessories and sunburn.

“you should’ve listened to ymir, now look at yall.” marco muttered while applying sunscreen to jean’s back aggressively.

jean wasn’t fazed as he sat in front of him and replied happily, “but like, now i get to have you put it on for me. it’s a win-win.”

“how is it a win-win?”

“you get to rub down my back.” jean looked over his shoulder, giving marco a shy smirk.

“mmch, mane, watch out.”

as marco finished applying, he slapped jean’s slightly sunburnt back with a smile. the slap caused jean to arch and scream, “ahh, stop, that hurtsss!”

you were seated in front of armin on another blanket as he sat on a chair. you applied sunscreen on armin’s face while those two had their moment. he closed his eyes as the sun shined on his face. you held his face in place with your hand to see how burnt he was. you studied his face closely in the sun as he leaned into your touch.

“you have a birthmark on your eyelid?”

you grazed it with your finger softly as you continued to apply a thick layer across his nose and cheeks.

“yea, nobody ever really sees it. let’s keep it between just you and me, alright?” he laughed softly at your observation.

“kk.” you let out a light giggle. your warm breath fanned armin’s face, causing his jaw to tense a little.

the only other people to have seen that birthmark had been his grandpa, eren, mikasa, and annie. he’d promised annie that she would be the girl in his life he’d show it to. she always kissed or grazed it lightly whenever she thought he was asleep.

armin slowly opened his eyes while exhaling deeply. he needed to stop thinking of the things she would do; he always caught himself comparing you two sometimes. everything you could do, she’d already done—probably better.

you were completely absorbed in applying an even coat to the rest of his face. he scanned your very concentrated face.

“hmm, you have really long bottom lashes.”

“nobody ever really notices them. my dark circles and fucked-up eyeliner kinda hide them.” you replied, still focused, not noticing his gaze falling onto your lips.

armin was trying hard to keep his eyes from falling onto your bathing suit, but he couldn’t help it. ever since this morning, he had been stealing peeks at you. he felt guilty about staring, but much couldn’t be done—especially when he’d seen your body undressed. while finishing up, you checked your “work” to ensure it was perfect. you caressed then lightly slapped armin’s cheek before removing your hand, “…perfect, now turn so i can do your back.”

armin turned around as you started working on his back. you shifted to sitting on your knees to be level with his back. he kept shifting as you rubbed his back. your fingers lingered on his back muscles. he was already ticklish, and your touch wasn’t helping.

“mmch… armin, stop moving or ima hit you!”

“don’t, he probably likes that, heh.” ashley interjects, cackling while putting eren’s hair into pigtails.

“ashley, shhh, stawppp it- wait, i mean, oh nooo, please don’t hit meee!!” armin giggles while looking at you over his shoulder.

“look at the bang master at work right now.” historia comments, lowering her big sunglasses. she’s lying in the sun next to ymir, still asleep.

everyone laughed while reminiscing on the name. some hadn’t heard it in forever. the name was so dumb and juvenile but would probably never die out. armin heard it prior to historia mentioning it; you teased him with it that one day.

it was the day you both went to the beach. that was the first time he’d gone back there with someone that wasn’t annie. he couldn’t focus too much on the memory. all his attention was being pulled by your working hands. he could feel you breathing on his neck and the heat radiating off your body.

you traced your nails along armin’s back, “you have a lot of freckles back here.” he shivered at the feeling.

“mhm, used to hide them for the longest time. kids used to make fun of me and say i had cooties.” armin continued making noises and squirming under your hands.

“awe, really? well, i like ‘em, they’re cute. i could probably trace my own constellations on your back.”

you continued tracing different shapes and swirls. you couldn’t keep your hands from feeling all over.

you had finished applying sunscreen on armin as mikasa and connie started asking to play volleyball. sasha shot up off her blanket excited—it’s been a while since she’d gotten to play. she’d played volleyball all her life and was good too. a few slowly agreed to play as you guys split off into teams.

ymir, historia, and ashley decided to sit the game out. the eight of you that were playing are known to not go easy. last time, marco scraped his forearms diving into a beach chair trying to get the ball back up.

team nut sandwich: mikasa, connie, jean, armin

team beluga: sasha, eren, you, marco

you guys decided to pick each other’s team names for some odd reason. the names were confusing and interesting.

“what does team beluga even stand for?” marco asked, slightly amused.

“belugas, ‘cause yall fat as hell.” mikasa responded without missing a beat.

connie snickered loudly as he peeked from behind her shoulder.

“what the fuck is nut sandwich even supposed to mean?” jean eyed your team with an unreadable expression.

“yea, not gonna lie, that’s kinda a freaky name.” armin agreed while side-eyeing you four.

with a disgusted look on your face, you caught onto what they were thinking. “oh baby, you’re sooo nasty…”

“it’s ‘cause yall are dumb nuts and idiot sandwiches, duhhh.” eren explained curtly while rolling his eyes.

“oh, alright… let’s get this game started then…” connie was suspicious of the explanation but wanted to move on.

…

the game ran shorter than expected. the volleyball ended up deflating when sasha spiked it on an extra pointy seashell. she claimed it wasn’t her fault, but everyone had spiked it on a shell and didn’t pop the ball once. she apologized and promised to buy a new ball.

the highlight of the game was marco and sasha’s random, unpracticed combo. it all started when you set the ball to sasha or marco after eren dove to pick it up. instead of getting a running start and just jumping like most people would, sasha and marco had other plans. before the game started, those two had been whispering and plotting, but nobody knew what yet. the only thing they had told you and eren was when marco was near the net to “send it realll high.”

marco yelled, “sash, go up!” as he stood near the ball you had set.

sasha got her running start and sprinted toward marco before stepping onto his hands as he launched her up for extra height. she had so much air time that all everyone could do was stand in awe while she spiked it. the sound of impact when sasha’s hand hit the ball made a loud slap! then it smacked into the ground. it popped from how hard it smashed into a shell.

“ayeee, we did that!!” “ya tu sabe!!”

marco helped sasha on her feet after she landed in a squat and rolled on the sand.

“oh my gawd!”

“are you deadass right now?!”

“how’d she even get up there?!”

historia, ymir, and ashley were the first to say anything after that stunt. marco was running around while carrying sasha. they were celebrating their newfound skill. everyone had tuned those two out while trying to figure out what they just witnessed.

“yo, that gotta be against the rules- there’s no power-ups allowed!!” connie tried to argue while still in shock at how that was even possible. as he fell backward onto the sand, trying to catch his breath, his eyes glanced over to the flattened ball, causing them to widen. “what the fawkkk, did they practice that?”

jean sat on the sand wiping sweat off his face, bewildered by what happened.

“i didn’t even think that was possible to do at all.” armin laughed at the insanity of pulling something like that off. he picked up the ball to throw it away while pocketing the shell as a souvenir.

“did you guys know they were gonna do that?” mikasa wasn’t too shocked at their shenanigans. she was more surprised that you and eren went along with their idea.

“no, they just told us to launch the ball whenever marco was near the net.” eren stood with his hands on his hips, taking deep breaths, trying to replay the play in his head.

“not gonna lie, they have my respect. that was so crazy.” you stood next to eren while rubbing your chin. there wasn’t much that could be said or done about the game now.

after that, the game wrapped up. you all decided to, instead of playing volleyball, go play in the water to cool down. it was going to be dinner time soon, and everyone would have to go back to the house to get ready.

5:49 pm, reiss’ beach house

everyone made it back to the house to quickly shower and throw on some clothes. there was a restaurant within walking distance that you guys always went to after a beach day. you could feel your stomach eating itself from how hungry you were. hunger goes away when you're having fun.

armin, marco, historia, eren, and mikasa were downstairs while waiting for the rest to finish. they were hungry too, growing hangrier by the second. the collective decided to send eren to collect the rest of the group.

you were scanned from the second floor as you were about to join them but found everybody had dispersed elsewhere. mikasa and historia were outside taking a quick smoke break to fight off the hunger. meanwhile, marco entertained himself trying to find a quick snack in the kitchen. armin was the only one in the living room. that left the entire living room to you and armin.

as you made your way down the stairs, armin watched from the couch. you got closer as you heard, “you look good, you’ve looked really good all day.” he scanned you from head to toe with a slight smile.

“you’re too sweet, i could eat you up right now.” you smile shyly at armin while biting down, making your teeth clink.

you sat down next to him and got comfortable, knowing the others would probably take thirty minutes to get out of the house. the both of you watched freaks and geeks while waiting. you laid into him more the longer you sat there. you always ran cold and had goosebumps on your arms from the AC blasting. there was a thin blanket covering just you, but it didn’t help.

“you’re literally shivering, are you good?” armin asks, seeing you balled up with the blanket wrapped around you.

“it's mad cold. literally brick city, brick dick brrr.” you crack yourself up laughing at your own answer.

“mmch… girl, be sooo foreal right now. come here.” he rolls his eyes at your laughing and opens his arms. he motions for you to lay closer for warmth. you follow his lead as you place the blanket over the both of you. the goosebumps on your arms start to disappear as your body heat starts to regulate itself.

the two of you sit there quietly as you notice the lack of distance. armin’s body slowly grew stiffer the closer you leaned into him. you put your legs over his lap to be more comfortable, and all he could feel was the pressure of them. he rested his hand on your thighs to keep you in place. you were trying to keep yourself from moving too much. you basically sat on armin's lap because of how cold you were and were not realizing how close you were.

you weren't lying when you said you could eat armin. today at the beach he was shirtless and had everything on full display. you couldn’t help but think back to the day of marco’s birthday. that was the last time you saw armin so exposed. when you put sunscreen on him, you did it slowly just to check him out. today armin looked unreal. he had a slight tan on his face from being in the sun and his hair was wavy from the salty ocean water. his hands keeping your legs in place made you feel weak in the knees. it had been a while since you felt like this.

“you good now?” armin asked in a low whisper, trying not to talk over the scene you were watching intently. armin felt slightly nervous from the lack of distance between your bodies. he wanted to be respectful, but you didn’t realize what you did to him.

“mhmm, im all warm thanks you.” you kicked your legs up and down on his lap, purposely trying to annoy him. armin nervously laughs from your movement as his ears grow hotter. he could feel his pants grow slightly tighter. you didn’t notice as your focus fell back onto the show.

…

everyone comes down soon enough as eren forces them down the stairs. the walk to the restaurant was relaxing. you could still hear the waves and the sun was setting. the air was cool and salty as the wind caused you to shiver a little.

the restaurant owner's daughter, bailey, was your server. it was a local family-run joint and they had the best fried fish you ever tasted. the place had gotten some updates since you were here last. their furniture was new and the lights were different. the big open windows were their favorite thing of yours. you could see the beach and fishing boats in the distance while you ate.

she greeted you all as she already put your group’s order in to be made. you all got seated and waited on the classic chicken tenders and fries with some fried seafood on the side. the thought of eating toddler food with all your friends made it feel like high school for a second, except connie didn't have a camera filming for his channel.

you, mikasa, jean, ashley, and ymir all sat on one side of the table while historia and connie sat on the ends. armin, sasha, eren, and marco sat across from you five. sasha sat between eren and armin because they kept poking each other.

while waiting for the food, connie asks to borrow historia's camera. he wanted to get the annual restaurant pictures. he wasn’t too sure he got himself in the frame and looked at the gallery. he was nose-deep into the camera before he started laughing. ymir looked over at what he was looking at and started laughing as well.

“no way, this is too good.” connie cackled while holding his stomach. he gave ymir the camera to show everyone what they saw. connie had zoomed in on the picture, clicking through them to see if everybody looked. he had noticed that in all the pictures eren and jean are playing footsies. in all the pictures, they were all smiles while playing with each other’s feet.

still sitting next to mikasa, jean pulled his legs up to his chest as she laughed, “what the fuck, why were yall playing footsies?”

ashley rubbed jean's back trying to comfort him from eren’s foot assault.

“jean started it,” eren answers, trying to ignore that he was slightly blushing while playing with jean.

jean argues back, “i thought you were marco,” trying to excuse it.

marco backs away from the table with a disgusted look, “yuck, ew, i don’t play with feet before i eat.” he was offended by the assumption.

ymir laughs, covering her mouth with her fist, “that was lowkey a bar, we making it out the suburbs with this one,” dapping up marco for his natural freestyle skills.

“holy fuck, this is all jean's fault,” eren crosses his arms across his chest, slouching deep into his seat.

“wait, eren, why did you keep playing with him?” your question puts eren in the hot seat.

“…i, uh” he looks down as his body sinks deeper.

sasha adds to the pressure as he looks for an answer, “who did you think it was?”

eren mutters, “i thought it was armin…” as he refuses to make eye contact with anybody.

historia states the impracticality of eren’s answer, “armin’s sitting two seats over from you.”

armin doesn’t entertain anything eren is trying to say, “yea, don’t bring me into this.”

eren gets defensive from all the questions being asked, “damn bitch, yall all up in my pussy, mind your own damn business!”

9:57 pm, the beach house

dinner ended with some free desserts, on the house of course, and no leftovers to bring back. you all were heading home soon. tonight everyone sat on the back porch while a few of you had some drinks or smoked. historia and ymir set up the fire pit to offer warmth and light while you all wind down. these were the days that made you feel like you were in high school again; just hanging out with your friends and being present.

one by one people started to head to bed. sasha and mikasa were the first to go. sasha ate so much she fell into a food coma. she was basically half asleep walking back to the house. mikasa was exhausted from swimming and playing volleyball. ymir and historia disappeared at some point. nobody knew when or how, but everybody noticed they were gone once eren said something. those two were most likely in their room. ymir would be would be reading and historia scrapbooking everything you did today.

eren and ashley looked like they were getting comfortable. you, armin, jean, connie, and marco took this as a sign to split off to give them some alone time. you all coincidentally went to do different things.

connie used the classic, “i really need to take a shit… see yall later!” he ran upstairs before anybody said anything. jean and marco said they wanted to take a stroll around the neighborhood and might pop in to see zeke, yelena, and onyakapon. yelena wanted jean’s insight on some paintings her family was looking at buying.

that left you and armin. you grabbed your pack of cigarettes from your bra and held them up while getting up, “me and armin are gonna go take a walk. i promised i’d teach him how to french.” you giggled as you shot a wink ashley's way. you reached for armin’s hand as you pulled him to follow you. he was caught off guard by what you said but let you drag him away by the hand. he grabbed the small blanket that was on the couch.

ashley stared intensely at you, already knowing what you all were doing. she replied back with a stiff smile, “have fun…” she quietly mouthed, “i'll end you both.” before turning back to eren. you give her one last exaggerated eye roll while you and armin walk along the beach.

armin followed quietly behind you as you still held onto his hand. you two walked some distance away before stopping to sit down.

“i didn’t realize i was still holding onto your hand, sorry.” you let go as his hand falls to his side. you ask him to pass you the blanket to set up. armin shook his head as he sat down next to you, leaning back on his hands. you sat with your knees close to your chest, your arms wrapped around them while resting your chin.

you both sat in silence while listening to the water. the waves were louder at night because of the moon. the wind blew stronger as well. you could see armin’s hair blowing wildly in your peripheral vision.

you started to light a cigarette, blocking the flame with your hand so the wind didn’t blow it out. armin’s eyes fell onto you for a while before he asked, “what was that you said about teaching me to french? you of all people know very well i know how to.” he was pouting at the possibility of you calling him a bad kisser or discrediting his skills.

“huh… OH, no, no, believe me i know you know how to french. i meant showing you how to french inhale,” laughing at his confusion obnoxiously, you show him your personal specialty.

“oh… ok, well now i just made a fool of myself.” armin sighs and laughs awkwardly. he covers his face with his hand as it flushes in embarrassment.

“no, you’re good-” you try to ‘comfort’ him and instead snort loudly in the midst of trying to contain your laughter, “oh my god- im so sorry.”

this causes armin to bury his face deeper into his hand, “no, go away, you're making fun of me.”

“oh, cmon! you know i can’t stand to see you upset.” you say teasingly, laughing even harder while shifting to sit on your knees. placing the cigarette in between your lips to hold, you start reaching for armin’s face. you try to remove his hand only to be met with him smiling.

you take the cigarette out of your mouth with your opposite hand, “see, that's more like it. now go ahead and show me those pearly whites, armin.” in retaliation, armin drops his head while shaking it slowly, hiding his smile.

you turn your head away from him to blow out smoke.

“show me or ima make you show me.” you laugh and roll your eyes at his lack of compliance.

still looking down, you could hear the smirk on his face, “hmmmm, i think you might have to make me.”

grabbing his face playfully, you force him to look at you. you lowly say, “yea, you’d like that, wouldn't you?” you laugh at armin’s flustered expression, letting go as you lay back on the blanket. you pull out a small pocket ashtray and flick off the ash of your cigarette into it. you continue to puff away as you catch your breath from laughing.

the void that was just filled with your playful laughter is now occupied by silence. the two of you stare at the sky in the comfortable quiet.

armin’s the first to interrupt, “you know… i wasn’t lying when i said you looked good.” he looks over at your laying figure.

taking a long hit from your cigarette, you respond, “i trust that you wouldn't ever lie to me. you’re an honest guy.” you slowly exhale, blowing o’s.

“you know that's not what i mean.” armin shifts onto his side, keeping himself steady with his forearms. he gets down to your level as he lays his hand in the space between you both.

“yea, yea, whatever you say…” laughing him off, you turn to your side, back facing him.

armin’s gaze focuses intently on your figure from the angle. he inhales sharply, feeling guilty about only being able to think about you in that way all day. his hand grips the blanket as he tries to blink away his desire. armin's tone is more firm,

“i couldn't stop staring at you today. is that fucked up?” his hand crawls slowly, waiting for your answer. you look over your shoulder at his pleading expression. you sit up, placing your hand over his, as you lean into his touch.

you look over your shoulder at his pleading expression. you sit up, placing your hand over his, leaning into his touch.

armin slowly moves closer, his hand sneaking up your shirt. “tell me when to stop, k?” his fingers settle under your chest, lightly squeezing.

nodding, you find your spot on armin’s lap as he pulls you onto him. you bring his head to your chest while you smoke. his other hand wraps around your waist, keeping you steady as you arch into him.

armin breathily whispers, “you have no idea how long i've been wanting you all day.” between kisses, he presses into your neck, soft and urgent.

you pull him back gently by his hair. inhaling some smoke, you perch your lips at armin’s, signaling him to open his mouth. his mouth hangs slightly open as you hover, sharing the smoke.

as armin breathes in, you take the chance to place a quick peck on his lips, gently swiping your leftover lip gloss off his lower lip with your thumb.

after resuming your feather-light touches, you glance down at the blanket—your phone lights up. it’s 11:24 pm.

you pout your lips while looking at armin’s lost expression. “we should start heading back. wouldn’t want them to catch us like this, right?”

he mimics your pout, murmuring, “i guess… i kinda been missing you.” his head hangs shyly as his fingers trace the waistband of your bottoms.

“oh! that’s… nice."

…

you and armin make it back to the house and quietly go to your separate rooms. you prepare to enter your shared room—and feel ashley’s wrath. walking in, you’re met with her laying on the bed, watching haikyuu on the tv.

you quickly shuffle into the bedroom’s bathroom before she can say anything and come out a while later, freshly showered. sliding into bed next to her, you shyly ask, “hey… so like, what if i tell you something crazy?”

the nightstand lamps light the room, and the ceiling fan clicks as it spins. ashley lets the show play as you fill the empty spot next to her. your sheets are white and cool against your warm skin.

“crazy how so?” she asks, head still facing the tv.

“well… crazy like maybe, i don’t know, random?” you turn on your side to face her, trying to gauge her reaction.

“you're getting me mad, just tell me already.” ashley finally faces you, sitting up straight.

you slowly sit up, fumbling with the edge of the blanket. “ok, ok, so like… me and armin have lowkey kinda been messing around… i’m like… sorta confused now.”

“are you trolling, right now?” she lets out a breathy laugh, shock evident on her face.

you start laughing along nervously. “…nooo.”

“BE SO DEAD-” ashley questions you loudly, making you swing and hit her with a pillow.

july 4, 1:23 pm, connie's backyard

at historia’s was when you decided to tell ashley about whatever was happening with you and armin. you wanted insight on the vibes and you didn’t want to tell anybody else.

she was shocked but mostly at how quickly things evolved between you two. you made her swear up and down she wouldn't tell anybody. it was something just for you and armin and you didn’t want to ruin it.

that night armin had left you confused. things seemed to be going past the friendship line. it had already been crossed but now it was something different. you’d grown used to being around him more often but that didn't mean anything, right?

armin and you had been doing a lot of things that would be considered nonplatonic, but you didn’t want to jump into things. your whole situation sprouted from a drunk night out.

you were going to let things play out. no need to change things the way they are now. you're comfortable if he's comfortable. every once in a while it felt nice having someone show you they wanted you, even if it’s just for the moment. you’d entertain it even if it was temporary and wasn't real.

today the house was hosting a 4th of july barbecue. this year it was going to be just something light with a few friends. pieck, porco, and colt came over, as usual, bringing small fireworks with them.

the sky in the sun was beating on everyone's back today. there were a few clouds here and there in the sky but it didn’t do much. you were lucky it wasn’t humid; that would’ve automatically made the barbecue indoors. the only saving grace of today was the trees in the backyard that offered shade and all the cold drinks being provided.

you were all scattered around the backyard as jean handled the grill. ashley and sasha were in the kitchen busy prepping the meat to bring out. connie was controlling the music but spent most of the time at the dominos table he just brought back from home.

mikasa was looking at all the fireworks and sparklers on a table with jean. they were trying to figure out if the house would get a smoke or noise complaint if the fireworks were to all get set off simultaneously. colt and marco were busy eating. they just enjoyed watching everyone while sharing some drinks.

in the following days after historia's you all went to visit your respective families. armin had been at his grandpa’s and spent a good amount of time reading to him. connie and sasha visited dominican republic while ashley went to el salvador.

mikasa stayed and visited her parents along with eren. jean stayed a couple days with his parents. marco’s family was out of the country on vacation so he joined jean. you visited your family and basically got to laze around all day.

eren, porco, and armin sat around the table with connie betting away their money. pieck and you sat on some lawn chairs nearby, watching them play.

“connie you’re hairs growing out, it looks so cute,” pieck rubbed his head while feeling his length. connie leaned into her hand, giggling and leaning into her touch.

“why don't you grow your hair out? it’d probably look really nice.” porco added while mixing the dominos.

armin started snickering, “oof, he can’t do that as long as he lives.”

“why?” pieck questioned, both of their curiosity peaked.

“he has too many opps out there.” eren added jokingly while snickering as well.

“what does that even have to do with his hair though?” porco split the dominos as he tried to understand.

connie starts the game as he also starts the story, “ok, so boom, it's sophomore year and like i was messing around with this girl the grade above me-”

“tell it right, connie.” you interrupt connie’s explanation while pieck takes hold of your arm and traces shapes on it.

“...oh my gawd, ok fine. i was messing with 3 girls in the grade above me-”

“3 girls?! yo, you're a real dominican.” porco hypes him up as he goes to dap connie up, “man, ya tu sabe, big dominican, being a demon runs in my blood.”

connie knocks on the table to skip his turn and resumes, “around this time was when i decided to let my hair grow. gotta show off the curls, you know? but anyways, im over here being young and turnt while one of them starts bitching at me.

“tell em the reason.” armin laughs already knowing what was coming. in the midst of his laughter his eyes search for you as you’re also laughing. he glances at pieck’s touchiness as he takes a sip of his beer.

“mmch, mane… she found out about my other girls and she’s over here talking about some, ‘oh you’re a whore, you’re for everybody’ and im like ‘woah woah relax’ and she's just spazzing. i don't even know why she was tweaking like girl you know how i be moving and also you ain’t even my girlfriend. i can't blame her too much, i guess, but she was so scary. she was like genuinely crazy and had anger issues so im automatically like ‘ouu, i better make sure im extra careful’ cus im worried for my personal well being.” connie takes a break to sip his beer after his long monologue.

“connie, get to the point already.” eren takes his turn and places down a domino.

“ok, ok, jeez. she basically tried to slap me and i was like oh no no no and juked her. i guess that got her tight so she like as i tried to back away from her she snatched me by my beautiful hair. i had sash beat her ass cus i needed to get my get back.” connie laughs at the memory of high school and all his shenanigans.

pieck laughs while playing with your jewelry, “this was all sophomore year? you really were a demon.” you continue to focus on connie's story as you let her do whatever.

connie answers, now focused on the game in front of him, “yeaaa, we both got suspended though. that's why me and sash got sent back to dr the summer after. it wasn’t even a punishment i was living the live foreal.”

eren knocks on the table, while remembering, “yo, the free connie and sasha era was too funny. they were both sending us videos of random shit over there.”

“i remember you sent us a video of you drunk crying while singing.” armin also adds while sneaking a glance over to you and pieck. you didn’t notice his lingering eyes on the two of you.

pieck had always been friendly and touchy with people. it had always been her nature but this time it seems armin took extra notice. he kept glancing over to you with an unreadable expression.

it wasn't an unknown fact that you and pieck have had ‘sleepovers’ but you didn’t expect that reaction from him. pieck was just being her usual self. he couldn’t expect you to change how the two of you interacted just because there was some history.

connie places his hand on his chest while closing his eyes, “chillll, i was in my feels about that girl. she like left her mark on me, that was some real drake shit.”

the game got serious after connie’s story. he and porco ended up winning at the end. they both got up and started dancing. connie whined his hips as porco went behind him and pretended to control them. eren and armin couldn’t be mad at losing when that was the celebration dance they got to watch.

…

armin got a minute to himself after he volunteered to go in the basement and look for some cases of soda. colt subbed in for armin in the domino game to not make them wait up on him. he searched around and finally got some time to think and process certain things.

seeing pieck who’s supposedly ‘just' your friend brought some underlying resentment to the surface for armin. he couldn’t help but think of annie and how reiner and bertolt were always so openly flirty with her. he didn’t like that he was comparing you to them but he couldn’t help it.

armin felt conflicted. he didn’t feel like there was anything he could say or do. you were in it for fun just like he was but he didn’t like sharing even if you didn’t belong to him.

he couldn't stop thinking about historia's house the night yelena, onyakapon, and zeke came over. yelena’s hands seemed to always be holding onto you in some way. all while you looked like you were eating up every second of all the attention she gave.

he couldn't wrap his head around you acting like that, all touchy-feely, with yelena one night and then make out with him, like it was nothing, the next day.

with all armin’s been through, he thought he deserved some sense of trust and loyalty. he didn’t understand why he decided to expect either from you when even annie, his first love, couldn’t give it to him. was he nothing but an option to you?

armin’s most logical decision was putting some distance. he didn’t want to run the risk of acting jealous and scaring you away. he also wanted to avoid facing you in case you had something to say.

he needed to detach himself before he started expecting certain things of you. it wouldn’t be hard for him either way, it's not like anything you did could compare to how annie did them. everything you did was a reminder of her in some way.

he had to remember at the end of the day you were there just for fun. he could run around with you and do anything without having to be committed. that was just the type of girl he saw you as.

…

armin was back outside eating one of the burgers jean made. he sat around on one of the lawn chairs with porco. they sipped their drinks as they watched you guys dance.

colt switched positions with jean, giving him a break. he was grilling a few more vegetables and pieces of meat. jean and marco were in some corner of the yard having a smoke break. they didn't want the smell to stick to the food.

sasha finally got to eat and mikasa joined her. mikasa kept telling her how excited she was to play with the sparklers and fireworks. porco complimented sasha and ashley on the seasoning of the meat.

you were dancing bachata with pieck. she was surprisingly really good at it. she learned from connie just a year ago but she was a natural. the both of your bodies were close and moving in sync as the ones eating watched.

connie danced by himself holding his beer as his partner. he didn't need someone to dance with to show how good he was. he was enjoying watching pieck show off what she learned.

ashley soon joined connie as he reached his hand out to pull her. she was shyly trying to decline until everyone started egging her on.

eren finally joined everyone eating after using the bathroom. he sat next to armin as he glanced at him. he could tell armin was watching you and pieck. he couldn’t read his expression though and that had him stuck about your two’s relationship.

eren looks around seeing everyone absorbed in their own thing before lowly asking armin, “yo, you good?”

armin gives him a weird look, “yea, why wouldn’t i be?”

“cus i see you staring mad hard at those two.” eren nods his head in the direction of you and pieck dancing.

“just people watching.”

“you don't feel some typa way?”

“why would i? she’s not my girl.” armin responds a little annoyed.

eren not wanting to press the topic just purses his lips and nods his head at his answer.

“also, you know im not tryna get into anything new, i’m good with where we’re at.”

“if you say so…” eren takes armin’s without going any more deeper into it. it seemed like something that was already on his mind.

eren knew armin wasn't alright with what he saw but there wasn't much he could do. you two were doing whatever you guys wanted and who was he to butt in. he could see armin going back to how he used to be with annie.

annie was pretty and always got attention from everyone. armin had to deal with it all through their relationship and had to get his insecurities under control. instead of admitting to them right now he was shutting them out. he was going to topple over soon enough.

eren joined mikasa and sasha’s conversation shortly after. he joined porco in complimenting the food. the praise caused sasha to go on a long and detailed explanation on how the seasoning and grilled enhances the food.

armin got up to go to a small table where the food was. you took this as your chance to talk to him. you needed to get a moment to talk. you also needed to get something to eat. pieck parted to go join marco and jean for a smoke after you told you wanted to eat.

you came up behind armin with a plate in hand and greeted him in a friendly tone, “hi!”

“...wassup” he answered coldy still picking at the food.

you awkwardly laugh to ease the mood, “nothing, just wanted to say hi, feels like i haven’t gotten to talk to you all day.”

“yea, you’ve been busy all day, i guess.” armin still didn’t look at you, it's like you weren’t even there.

“what’re you on?” you were confused until you realized what he meant, “oh c’mon armin, dont be like that. you know it's not like that.” you look at him, tilting you head, with a saddened look. he doesn't meet your gaze and continues to focus on the food.

“im just pointing out an observation. im chilling, you can do whatever you want to do.” armin gave you a gentle smile before walking away.

you were left alone with the food until ashley joined you. she asked about what she just saw go down. even she could see the tension in the conversation. you didn’t understand what his problem was.

you decided to give armin the space he wanted. you stayed a distance away from him hoping he cooled down and would be more understanding later on. you didn’t like that things were like this but what could you do.

armin being jealous or feeling some way made no sense to you. you thought he was just in it to mess around but maybe he felt differently. you should’ve been more considerate of him and how he felt.

you and ashley went to join the new domino game with sasha and eren. you guys, besides eren, hadn’t gotten to play since connie was focused on keeping his winning streak. sasha was ready to show off her mikasa to watch. she had bet eren she’d win the first game so she had an even bigger motive. marco had came back and decided to watch. he egged on eren and sasha’s bet by also adding onto it.

pieck came back soon enough and started dancing with colt. she and connie focused on teaching him how to dance while porco laughed. armin sat quietly next to jean as they both talked about the fireworks. jean and mikasa had spent some time separating and organizing them into a nice sequence to light.

armin took the space you gave him as you icing him out. he didn't like that at all. he wanted you to at least explain yourself to him, he thought he deserved that much. he wanted you to chase after him and talk.

he was reminded of annie in that moment. annie did the same exact thing. she iced him out but at least she talked to him. she did that better than you. she didn’t let him talk much but she gave him the satisfaction of a conversation at least. that’s all he wanted right now. all he wanted was to talk things out.

7:43 pm

drinks ran out earlier than expected. jean was meant to buy a couple of cases for today but got busy handling the grill. armin volunteered, again, to go buy some. he had his fake id on him so it wouldn’t be a hassle for him to go. the liquor store was a few blocks away anyways. armin also wanted to get away from everyone for a little.

the streets weren’t that empty on armin’s walk. people were arriving to parties or were already drunk and hanging out on their porches. on his walk he mostly spent it waving at people that were outside or driving by. it was a little cooler than it had been earlier that day. the sun was still beating on armin’s face but it was going to set soon.

when entering the quietly liquor store, armin was greeted by the attendant, kaylee. he asked where a certain bottle, mikasa asked for, was before going straight for the cases.

the store was empty and quiet. armin tried to make some conversation with the clerk by asking her why she wasn't out and he just got back a curt, “im canadian.” he decided to leave her alone as he walked down the aisles. the lights made a low buzz that made armin’s ears ring. the sound of his shoes squeezing on the weirdly sticky floor didn't help either.

he spent some time in the aisles making sure he picked up everything that was asked for. he heard the door bell ring signaling that someone entered but he couldn't see who it was.

as he headed for the front counter to pay he spotted a certain blonde in front of him. he slowed his steps until he stopped a few feet away from her. she had noticed someone walking in her direction and had looked up, also stopping what she was doing.

“hey, you… long time no see?” she broke the silence, nonchalantly.

armin awkwardly laughed, “right… hi, annie, how you been?”

“im fine, i just wanted to say im so sor-”

“no need, i can assure you it's no need. really.”

“yea you’re right…” annie’s eyes scan armin’s person quietly before stopping, “blue razz four lokos? im assuming that's for you.”

“mhm, my signature.”

“yup,” she gave him a look, the same guilty look she gave him last time, “i know you better than anyone.”

“you really do.”

that little thing annie said. ‘i know you better than anyone.’ made armin’s breath catch in his throat. he knew she wasn’t wrong and he loved but hated the fact she knew she wasn’t either. even to the end of their relationship she knew how it had to end so they could let each other go. she knew his mind inside and out and it scared him how much trust she gained to have that knowledge.

“let me pay for some four lokos, it's the least i can do. for old times sake, you know?”

“…alright.”

the both of them head to the register as kaylee scans their things. the two of them stood there quietly as the beeps of the cash register filled the silence. making their way out the door and hearing the bell ring made them realize their time would end.

annie hesitates asking, “wanna walk?”

they walked around a few blocks watching people in the yards. everyone was in their pools or barbecuing. the sun had already started to set when armin got to the liquor store. the small talk didn’t last long since silence seemed to always find its way in between them.

armin was in his head trying to figure out if he had too much to drink or if this was real. annie was mentally cursing herself for forcing him to walk with her. there was so much to be said but they opted for quiet.

annie and armin sat down on a curb they found. it was on an empty street where a few people were partying. they both opened a can of four lokos as they sipped quietly.

he felt nostalgic in a sense, it’d been a while since he actually got to be just the two of them. silence with annie never made him feel uncomfortable. it rather made him feel at home.

their moment was interrupted by some fireworks. it seemed like this year they were starting early. it was a random house a few blocks away.

the sky had grown darker, the only lights being the fireworks and the street lights. the smell of smoke lingering in the air made their noses burn.

neither had uttered a word. the idea of the two of them watching fireworks like this felt like a sick form of deja vu. armin’s words were stuck in his throat. the only thing that would spill out would be his disappointment in her and how things turned out.

it took armin a while but he was the first to fill the silence, “do you think i hate you?” it seemed to be the only thing on his mind. annie never once reached out besides right now.

annie leaned back on hands while looking at the sky, “a little, i don’t see why you wouldn't hold some sorta resentment towards me.” her voice was light and flowed like it always did. her honesty made armin’s chest squeeze. she always preferred to tell the truth, even if it did hurt others in the process.

“dont be like that, you know i could never hate you. ever.” armin stares at her side profile, he can’t look away. his eyes always found their way to her face.

“that’s not be the best idea and you know it. you’re smarter than that.” she gave him a dry laugh.

armin leaned back resting on his hands as well, “you know me best, you said it yourself. nobody could ever compare to you.” both of their fingers touching. she never pulled away from his touch. she welcomed it as she placed her hand on top of him.

the two of them sat there quietly watching the firework show. there was so much more armin wanted to say but nothing came out. the air was full of unsettled emotions.

annie was punishing herself with making their encounter drag on. she wanted armin to hate her and curse her. if he did it wouldn’t be so hard for her to miss him. she hurt him but he still wouldn’t grant her the pleasure of being called the bad guy.

after everything went down annie still had reiner and bertolt at her side caring for her and now she had armin’s permission to come back. she felt like her punishment was a lack of consequences. guilt was riddling her and it’ll continue to consume her.

armin gave in regardless of his hurt and confusion. he wanted to reclaim the emotions and relationship annie so easily let go but it didn't happen. he didn’t realize how much he’d missed the things she did until now. he didn’t want to leave this moment with her. this could possibly be his last time feeling like this.

he wished he could punish her but it wasn’t in his nature and they both knew it. he wanted to let go of her but he wasn’t ready, not yet at least. he’d hold onto their last moments punishing himself by keeping her memory alive.

the warmth of their hands together made them feel clammy. the liquor flowing down their throat didn't help the heat their bodies radiate. annie let out a light sigh holding his hand tighter. armin just looked down at their hands entwined. neither wanted to leave the moment, they didn’t want it to be their last.

armin glanced at annie as if he was trying to take a picture of her in the moment. he didn't realize his hand had made its way to her chin, a force of habit. she never once denied his touch. she leaned into it causing her lips to hover over his.

she could smell the blue razz on his breath, drawing her in even closer. armin swallowed hard, finally sealing the kiss. their foreheads pressed to each other.

annie didn’t realize she started to sweat, maybe from the nerves or the weather, it didn’t matter. they both breathed in sync while catching their breaths as so many things went through their heads.

it only lasted a few seconds but those few seconds felt so raw. both of their quiet masks had been ripped off and they laid bare, forced to be exposed to each other.

annie was the first to talk, her voice rasped, “you know im bad for you.”

armin replied gently, staring into her eyes, “doesn’t matter to me.” he put some space between them as he tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. he caressed the side of her face as he held it close like he always did.

she held her hands on top of his again, “i don’t want anything right now, armin. i don’t wanna get your hopes up.” annie never met his eyes, her sight watched his lips.

“it's ok, it doesn’t have to be anything more than this. i just miss the way you did things.” he practically whispered the last part. he wanted to stay just like this.

“you have to promise it means nothing, i wouldn’t want to do anything that could hurt you more than i already did.” annie held out her pinky, eyes still never meeting armin’s. she knew she shouldn’t be doing this, her guilt was eating her alive. she could help that she also missed the familiarity.

armin interlocked his pinky with her, “you know i wouldn't ever lie to you.” he let out a breathy laugh at the old tradition.

they both ‘sealed’ the promise by kissing their thumbs. armin’s never left annie’s once, but her gaze was averted the entire time.

armin hadn’t felt that connection to someone in so long. maybe it was the alcohol and weather making his delusional but he never felt closer than ever to annie.

college au where you live out everything you expect of your young adult life

friday, 6:02 pm, the house

last night you went to bed late and ended up waking up late as well. that morning was a blur of people constantly coming in and out. you, ashley, and jean spent the day cleaning up the house and putting away the fragiles.

“no way, your dms have been blowing up with reposts of your fuck-ass party poster!” jean cries out laughing while looking at connie's phone. he continues scrolling through the boy's phone while marco sits, looking over his shoulder as well.

connie looks over at jean and marco, splitting gummy worms and swiping through his phone. “aye, don't scroll too much. you might see something you won't like.” he giggles as marco turns off the phone before jean can go any deeper.

jean pouts and rolls his eyes, exhaling, “i wanted to see that. what's wrong with being a little curious?”

connie dealt with getting beer and liquor. you and ashley went on a store run; you bought cups while jean grabbed cases of soda. by the time you had some alone time, it was already late.

you and ashley shuffled into the bathroom to clean up your hair and makeup. at that moment you felt light. your stomach felt empty but you weren't hungry. you felt good about tonight. really good.

ashley shifts slightly as she focuses on her eye makeup. “you excited to see anybody specific tonight?” she asks, trying to get a feel for any ‘plotting.’

“nah, not really… actually, maybe ymir? it's been a minute since i saw her, and lowkey i wanna ask her what she's been up to, you know?” you don’t expect much to happen tonight besides catching up with friends—the usual.

“oh yea, i haven't seen her in forever. yooo, you know who else i haven't seen in a while? annie, reiner, and bertolt. have you heard anything about annie from armin?”

“not really? i mean they’re both busy. annie's a sophomore at MNU, and armin’s in a frat. reiner, bertolt, and annie have always been tight, so i don't think there's much to worry about.”

a thought—or rather, a specific person—pops into your head. “i know you're excited to see a specific someone tonighttt.” you tease, shoving ashley lightly.

“girl, miss me with that. i’m just tryna have some fun tonight.”

“yea, and you always end up having fun with the same guy. y'all always run off to the roof.”

“ok? god forbid a girl enjoy two beautiful views.”

you cringe as she tries to write off her alone time with her little ‘friend.’ sneaking off together is basically a tradition for those two. nobody really notices since they've never been caught, but you live with ashley. you could tell.

8:36 pm

you and the boys pregamed before people started arriving. jean sets his dr. pepper on the table and pulls out a little bag of gummies from his cargo pants pocket.

“yo, this better not end like the last party. we might actually get the cops called on us,” you say, giving connie a nasty look as he reminisces and cackles at the memory.

“i'm not gon hold you, i didn’t even know that was gonna happen. it's not my faulttt.”

“what did you think was gonna happen when you yelled out, ‘rep your set!’ at a party?” marco asks, trying to understand connie's thought process.

“i dead wanted to see what would happen. what’s wrong with being a little curious?” the three of you stare at connie in disbelief at the lack of thought behind his actions.

it’s been decided, through past experiences, that connie will make no public announcements tonight.

10:48 pm

as people get closer to the sound of music blasting, the house comes into view. people are on the porch smoking while empty beer bottles litter the lawn.

jean leads people inside while greeting them and those he passes. you hear a constant line of “yoo,” “wassup,” “wasgood.” meanwhile, connie’s already getting loud; you hear “klk klk” and “dimelo papi” from another part of the house.

the house feels hot and humid from the constant movement of bodies. the low led lights set the ‘party’ mood. the atmosphere is thick with smoke and the smell of alcohol.

the intro of bean (kobe) by lil uzi vert blasts from the speakers in the living room and backyard. you hear the muffled singing of people shouting, “in my triple cup, that's two times two! man, this shit darker than a wonton soup, ayy! yeah, my eyes red, but i’m no damu. if you don't run it up, that's all on you!!”

this whole scene feels like a hazy dream; your high’s already hitting.

you make your way from the kitchen, stopping for a drink, to the back porch—that's where the ‘stoners’ reside. you greeted annie earlier; low red eyes, already in the kitchen, babysitting a beer between bertolt and reiner.

you catch a glance of jean sprawled out on a couch. marco’s hand rests on his thigh while they talk to sasha and colt. they’re getting into it about reviving their minecraft world. sasha blames colt for not being a good farmer while he complains she has too many pets.

you see ymir and historia dancing in the distance with people recording them. historia’s hair had bubblegum pink raccoon stripes added to the mix of blonde. she still isn’t attending MU yet, but she’s already so popular. she’s going to love freshman year.

you see ashley in the distance getting hit on by eren. you can’t even try to imagine what’s happening over there—you’ll maybe ask her about that later.

you sit down next to mikasa and pieck; they greet you with a slight nod. a group of people outside are already sparking up. pieck and porco continue their conversation while mikasa comments every so often.

spliffs are being passed around alongside light-up cigarettes. you can barely make anybody out with how much smoke is surrounding you.

you take a couple hits from the spliff and start to ease up even more. time seems to slow as you feel like you've been sitting outside for 20 minutes already.

you feel a figure stand behind you and shift to the open spot on your left. you catch a glimpse of him as he holds a newly lit joint—it’s armin.

“you good? you look fried.” he laughs, staring at your bloodshot eyes and holding the joint to your mouth. you inhale while glaring at him, “really? i didn’t know weed did that to you.” you sarcastically reply as he passes it to the next, reaching past your head.

you both get comfortable quickly, and you shift closer to him. your back rests against the armrest of the couch while your legs drape over his lap. you catch up a little. most people have left the little 'smoking’ area and moved to different parts of the house.

you notice him staring into the house, sort of analyzing something. he looks down to ‘reset’ his vision, making sure his eyes aren’t playing tricks on him.

you try to peek at what he's concentrating on but can’t get a clear angle. “what's wrong? i can’t see, i wanna watch too.”

he snaps out of his trance. “nah, it's nothing. i was just watching sasha and connie drag porco and colt in cup pong.” he gives you a light smile while scratching the nape of his neck.

“ouu, i feel bad for them. they have no idea how competitive those two are.” sasha and connie are the worst people to go up against in any drinking game.

you check your phone for the first time in a while and see it's 12:05 am. you’ve been outside the entire time, and it seems like it’s time to head to the basement.

armin lags slightly behind you, typing away on his phone. you step inside, waiting for him, but he says quickly, “ima make my way downstairs, i gotta catch up with some people i just saw. don't wait up for me, alright?”

“it's cool. i’m crossed, i could get kidnapped, you know?” he rolls his eyes and feigns annoyance at your comment. you part ways with him as he continues typing and calling someone.

12:09 am

you make your way through the house and greet some people you hadn't seen. the hallways feel even more crowded than they did before you went outside.

you’ve just been floating around in and out of it. the sound of el farlsante remix by ozuna brings your attention back as you enter the hazy basement. you see everyone sitting around a coffee table. a few people are missing.

you settle down next to mikasa and rest your head on her shoulder as she rests hers on top of yours. she continues talking with historia and ymir as they sit across from you.

eren continues to scroll away on twitter while eavesdropping. he's multitasking all while holding his geek in his mouth. what a talented young man.

sasha and connie keep porco entertained near the little bar area as he goes on a tangent. sasha has a firm grip on a bag of popcorn. nobody knows where she got it from; it just spawned in her hand.

pieck and colt are seen near the trio, mixing drinks and seeing who can take a shot with no reaction. it looks like pieck is winning based on how colt flushes red every time he takes a shot. you couldn’t imagine ever out-smoking or out-drinking that girl.

jean and marco interrogate ashley while they play pool. they’ve grown to notice eren and her coincidentally disappearing at the same time. she tries to deny any suspicions while the boys side-eye her.

everyone takes some time to get away from the crowded upstairs and hang out. you laugh at the sight of all the boys flocking to eren for his miami mint. you don’t miss the opportunity to hit when offered.

“you were talking to armin outside, right? where'd he go?” mikasa asks, noticing a few people still aren’t there.

the basement is slightly packed with people. everyone, even pieck, colt, and porco, is spread out somewhere in the basement. armin and a few others seem to be missing. maybe he got caught up talking.

you close your eyes, trying to remember what he said he was going to do or where he went, but nothing comes up. you’re beyond the point of remembering the details.

eren joins in, twirling a strand of his hair as he sits up straight. ashley happens to look over at the couches, her eyes drawn to eren. you shudder at the sight of your friend blushing while a grown man plays with his hair.

“i kinda don't remember, he said he was like gonna say wassup to some people.”

“i'll lowkey just track him. if anything, he won't be hard to find. he don't even know i got him bugged.” eren adds, smirking, flashing his screen showing armin’s location.

1:27 am

everyone heads back upstairs to dance and get back to the party. on your way to the living room, you hear te bote by nio garcia and start dancing with connie.

you feel the crowd moving to the music. you and connie move in sync while he keeps the other guys from getting near you.

other people are dancing too, recording the moment to remember. the living room has turned into a wave of people moving to the music.

you turn your back to connie as you continue to dance on him. you see ashley and eren sitting on a couch getting close. you make eye contact with her, and she smirks.

you mutter, “ah hell nah bruh.” you lose sight of her in the crowd.

you catch sight of reiner and bertolt passing in the crowd. they’re both trying to listen to something on reiner’s phone. they disappear before you finish your thought, looking slightly frantic.

1:42 am

you decide you need a drink and leave connie—you saw a girl eyeing him while dancing. you watch the scene unfold. jean lingers in the kitchen before taking off to smoke.

you sit on the kitchen counter and open instagram. scrolling through stories, you see people posting about the party.

after some time, sasha joins you in the kitchen. she stands between your legs while looking down at your phone. she makes small talk and checks up on you.

the night hasn’t slowed down at all. the house has been jumping with music and people for hours.

in the span of those hours, you haven’t gotten to talk to the guys from MNU. you saw them once in passing, then they disappeared. they might’ve taken off—they’ve got a lot to do for their junior year.

blasé by ty dolla $ign blasting is suddenly interrupted by connie screaming, “yo, cops pulled up! everybody get the fuck out!” as the music cuts, people scramble like bugs.

people rush to leave the house; some out the front, some the back, others jumping from windows and the second story. it's pure madness. nobody is in the right state of mind to process the scene.

the streets flood. cops mix with the crowd of college students, trying to detain some as they run.

flashing police lights and flashlights create a semi-blinding effect. this doesn’t slow people down—it encourages them to run like their lives depend on it.

the sound of heavy breathing, footsteps, shouting, and walkie-talkies fills the air. street lights and moonlight make it easier to blend into the night as people sneak past cops and sleeping families.

2:27 am

the night comes to an end. all that’s left are empty bottles and full ashtrays. the mourning after by mac miller plays lowly as everyone winds down. tonight will be remembered—it’s certainly a way to celebrate the end and beginning.

you’re fading in and out. it’s almost 3 am, and most people have left. the only ones staying behind are a few friends from MU.

a few people in the living room are passed out while others are still awake. you stumble around, trying to find a place to rest. you can’t be bothered to go to your room. tomorrow, you’ll feel terrible.

upstairs

multiple voices come from connie's room. through the slightly cracked door, armin, eren, and mikasa can be seen. they ended up tracking down armin.

their hushed voices carry as they sit at the end of the bed.

eren aggressively types and calls someone on his phone. he runs his hand through his hair, nibbling on his thumb, trying to find something to do with his hands. he mutters angrily while keeping his eyes on the blond.

mikasa crouches in front of armin, running her hands through his hair. she talks to him slowly as she studies his face. she offers him water but gets no response.

armin hunches over on the bed bench, hands in his hair. he looks frozen in place, not even glancing at mikasa. his expression is blank, unreadable.

this party was supposed to celebrate the start of summer, but it welcomed another end.

thursday, 8:03 pm, mitras university

freshman year was officially over. you had finished your finals and basically crawled your way home. you had been one of the few students waiting to get them over with early.

all you could think about was sleeping for three days, but one of your roommates had other plans. he had been waiting for you to finish the last of your finals. he wanted to celebrate officially surviving the first year at mitras university.

freshman year had come and gone a lot quicker than you expected. it was definitely a change of pace compared to high school. it was a bigger world with many new experiences.

college life had been good to you. being a campus radio dj was really fun—it opened a new and different way to get familiarized with people. you were semi-popular and known, since most enjoyed your station; it made talking to people easier because they already knew of you.

music was your world and your future.

all connie could think about was how he was going to throw the last rager of freshman year. it was all anyone could talk about for the last week. his reputation had grown from the multiple parties he'd thrown.

it wasn't completely his fault; lots of people would show up, especially friends of friends. these parties were known to start crazily. the night always ended with people talking; either they enjoyed their time or regretted their experience.

these parties became memories of their own. they made you want to come back for more. your house was off-campus, and there was no campus security to shut it down.

these parties were a come-all; they even invited people from the opposing school, marley national university. the various people and connections that made appearances at these parties drew even more attention. you couldn't ever imagine missing a connie party.

you walked home as the sky shifted to night. you were pretty sure tonight would be a rest day—some calm before the madness that would be unleashed tomorrow.

the walk back made you feel at ease. it was cool outside, with clear skies to match. you reached your street and saw the house in the distance.

you rummaged for your keys, already catching a glimpse of the scenes unfolding through the open blinds.

everything was visible thanks to the tv and lamps illuminating the room. connie and jean were wrestling in the living room. ashley sat off to the side on a sofa, not batting an eye at the boys. you could hear them yelling and giggling, with a muffled comment here and there from ashley, as you got closer to your lawn.

you opened the door, and as it clicked, you had a clear view of the full scene. ashley greeted you with a small hi and a "how did your finals go?" as she paused whatever she was watching on tv.

connie was now on top of jean, pinning his arms down. "wassup, guess what tomorrow night is?!" he greeted you excitedly as he froze mid-pin.

jean froze alongside him while answering, "one of your parties. everyone already knows. you've literally been talking about it for the past week." he rolled his eyes and shifted positions with connie, putting him into a headlock while both knelt on the ground.

"yo! can you guys stop? today is supposed to be just us chilling before one of connie's 'diddy' parties. y/n just finished her finals." ashley put an end to their wrestling match as she picked up the goldfish they seemed to be fighting over.

jean snickered at the diddy party comment while freeing connie's head. connie furrowed his brows from both the pain and the 'hurtful' remark.

ain't no party like a connie party.

you continued to leave your shoes at the door and set down your keys as you chimed in, "ashley's lowkey right, i'm mad tireddd. i just wanna chill with y'all tonight."

you excused yourself to the upstairs bathroom as you walked past them. all you could think about as you stepped into your room was what you'd be doing the whole break before school started back up in august.

you grabbed things for a quick shower as you tried to imagine what tomorrow night would be like; you'd be seeing everyone again.

it had been so long since you'd all seen each other at the same time. ever since graduating high school, you guys had kind of split up.

you had connie, jean, and ashley, and you all decided to move into connie's house since you wanted to be more independent. none of you would admit it, but the move-in wasn't just for 'learned responsibility.'

sasha was planning to move out. connie seemed lonely in his house, so the three of you decided to join him. this led to many late-night missions and a house that never slept.

marco was around often since he and jean tried to spend as much time together as possible. the sight of them being couple-y and cuddly on your shared couch made you sick. yuck.

armin and eren had their frat life. it was pretty insane to think about, but they did most things together. nothing out of the ordinary there. they were busy with hazing and side quests.

mikasa and sasha were going steady. they even lived together. they also made you sick with their pda. double yuck.

sasha, and sometimes mikasa, came around often though. she and connie were cousins and also connected at the hip. if she didn't make an appearance at least once a week, something was wrong.

ymir came around sometimes but spent all her free time in her apartment with historia. historia was finally coming to MU next semester. they'd been together for the past three years; they were basically married. triple yuck.

annie, reiner, and bertolt all went to marley national university. they were 'traitors' as everyone bashed them for the last two months before graduating. one would think armin would join annie at MNU. they'd been going steady for the past year or two, but he decided to go with mitras university. 'not wanting to be a distraction' was brought up, among other reasons. at least annie wasn't alone; she had reiner and bertolt at her side.

the past year had been a transition period. sophomore year was near, and you could feel the anxiety of another year.

you could feel that the next few months were going to be full of exploration and experiences.

everyone was being reunited. you couldn't decide if you were more excited or nervous to see them all. that didn't matter right now; that was a thought for tomorrow. tonight was a day of rest.

you made your way back downstairs to the living room in one of marco's t-shirts and some baggy gym shorts. ashley was bringing more blankets when she came into view.

you helped her bring more snacks before deciding to join the boys' last-minute smoke session. you went outside on the back porch as they smoked. you all sat in silence as the night grew darker. there was nothing but the butt of the joint left before you all made your way inside.

you all got comfortable on the couch as your highs settled in. you felt warm between ashley and connie. empire records started to play, and you could already feel jean dozing off. tonight was the end of freshman year, but tomorrow would be the official start of break.

7:18 pm, the theatre

school was starting up soon, and summer break was coming to an end. there were only a few more weeks left before the fall semester started, and you were all preoccupied with homework.

as a farewell to the soon-to-end summer, the theater jean and you worked at were finally performing their show. all summer, they had been working on ‘natasha, pierre, and the great comet of 1812,’ and were ready to present. the theater was packed with friends and family of all the actors and staff.

all your friends were sitting in the few front rows as you and jean stayed backstage to help out. you were still obviously needed for sound and music, while jean was helping here and there with people’s makeup. as open curtain grew closer, everyone seemed to be jumping with anxiety. another reason a few people seemed to be jumping with anxiety was because of annie, reiner, and bertolt.

earlier, during the search for a choreographer, annie had applied and gotten the position. all of you had been cordial and spoken as little as possible whenever needed. armin was the last to know about this, since nobody wanted to bring up that you and jean were almost near annie on a daily basis.

armin only found out when he spotted reiner and bertolt sitting a few seats down. when he started to read the playbook to distract himself, he stumbled upon the name ‘annie leonhart’ in the staff section. it seemed like the musical wasn't the only theatrics going on tonight.

as he read her name, he couldn't help but feel kind of proud. annie was always serious about competitive dance, and the fact that she was willing to work as a choreographer showed her passion. that’s one of the things he loves about her—she didn’t show or say it, but she could get so passionate about the things she truly cared about.

connie and ashley were well aware of the situation but didn't say much. when you and jean came home to tell them the news of annie, the two of them had mixed reactions. anybody who saw annie dancing could tell she was skilled and serious about it, so her getting hired was to be expected. they were mostly concerned about how her presence would affect you and jean, as you would all have to work together. the three of you did figure out how to deal with each other, since this was work.

sasha knew early on as well, since she was over the day the beans were spilled. she found it hilarious, since only this would happen to you guys. you and jean sometimes found yourselves in situations nobody could expect. the same way that once, when you two were leaving school late and headed to a bar to pregame, you ran into levi and his friends, hange and erwin. nobody believed you guys until mikasa received pictures of the five of you playing darts.

mikasa and eren were on guard in the theater. they had already scoped out bertolt and reiner as well and wanted to keep some distance between armin and them altogether. they were aware of annie but already knew she would likely avoid causing a scene. they just didn’t want there to be a possibility of something happening.

the show seemed to be starting as the lights in the theater dimmed. everyone got comfortable as their conversation dwindled down to mere whispers.

…

you were on sound and making sure mics were working. the whole night, you’d be in the back making sure the show ran smoothly. the thought of almost the whole show riding on you being focused kind of freaked you out, but you’d been doing this for so long it was second nature. the one thing you got to do was enjoy the show from another area. you were able to watch it without interruptions from people nearby and in your own non-crowded space.

jean was backstage helping with makeup and props. he was actually really good at doing makeup, since he treated faces like a canvas. he helped with props as well and was on hand for any malfunctions. he was excited for his sets to be shown on full display. he’d been working so hard to perfect them and was ready to see them presented as they should be.

annie was also running around backstage. she was helping with cues and prepping sequences as the acts went on. from the sound booth, you could see her scurrying around. she was good at getting actors in check, especially if they were getting nervous. the rest of your group could see glimpses of her as well. it was the first time they’d seen her since connie's party—well, not armin. he’d been seeing her pretty often now.

the three of you were in motion. right now, the issues you all had didn't matter. all that mattered was showing off your collective hard work. everyone in the theater could tell how much work production put into the play, and it showed on their faces.

armin’s eyes seemed to search for more glimpses of annie. she looked happy with what she was doing. she wasn’t the most expressive, but there were times when she let her stoic expression fall and showed her love for things. armin couldn’t help but feel his chest tighten at seeing that expression again. it wasn’t targeted at him—it hasn't been for a while. he craved to have her look at him like that again.

lately, when he did see her, it was when they would hook up. they never talked much, though. the few words that were spoken were empty, with lust coating them. the silence between them didn't hold much meaning anymore. it was filled with the warmth of their gasping breaths and blank eyes. the moments between them were fleeting, and he hated it.

armin wondered if reiner and bertolt got to see annie without her mask. was the silence between them full of the same passion he yearned for? did she save all her emotions for them while he only received her delicate touches instead? he felt so choked up by the thought of it all. she was still giving him the time of day, though. that meant something. he hoped it meant something—anything. to armin, this meant something. maybe it was everything to him.

intermission

as intermission started, people used this as a break to stretch their legs, go to the bathroom, and get snacks. people flooded the lobby as they mingled with each other and discussed the play. some of the production used it as a break as well, if they could. a few staff members wandered around as they greeted friends or family.

you and jean found a gap of time where you two could sneak off set and go talk to your friends. annie seemed to use it as well, since she was slightly lagging behind you before parting off when entering the lobby. the first to spot jean and you was ashley. she’d been getting a playbook and waved happily before coming your way. the three of you rejoined your group of friends as they gushed over the play so far.

connie and sasha had been sharing a small bag of popcorn, while eren excused himself outside for a small vape break. mikasa complimented the sets jean painted as marco proudly hyped him up. jean was acting shy at all the praise. ashley asked how everything was so organized with so many people and things going on. armin loved the play selection. he was a bit of a theater geek and was so excited once he found out it was natasha, pierre, and the great comet of 1812 being shown.

they could all tell why you and jean loved working at the theater in the summer. they saw everything everyone worked on finally being completed and put together.

as you all talked amongst yourselves, armin’s eyes naturally scanned the area. his eyes caught onto a particular trio, specifically a blonde girl. their eyes met at a glance. her eyes shifted slightly, from having that excited smile on them to their usual look. armin’s eyes couldn't help but soften at her every time. they were so different; it was almost as though they were looking at completely different people.

armin felt that pang in his chest again as he stared. it was slightly different this time. it felt the same as when they first started dating. it was a yearning. he wanted to tell her how much he admired her from afar. he felt the word vomit coming up, but everything he wanted to say kept getting stuck in his throat. that lump in his throat made it so he would only be silent and watch as others were graced with her presence. armin wanted nothing more than to be in her presence again as she expressed anything but a fleeting feeling.

annie broke eye contact easily. she went back to reiner and bertolt. the look in her eyes changed back to excited. she didn't spare armin a wave. armin didn't know why he expected it, especially with his friends around—especially with you around. he wanted some form of acknowledgement, something besides a mere distant glance.

you and jean ran backstage before getting in trouble for leaving. intermission had almost been done, with five minutes remaining. everyone was heading back soon, but armin said he had to use the bathroom. he got caught up in conversation and forgot to go earlier.

“no bueno, there’s mad people. it's gonna take you a while to get in there,” connie warned armin, looking at the long line.

armin’s eyes fell onto the line as well. he shook his head before quickly saying, “it's fine, i don't mind waiting in line. don't wait up for me, alright?” he separated from the group as he joined the line and they entered the theater.

as armin stood in line, it moved quicker than expected. it seemed like the women’s bathroom line was what made the wait seem longer. as he stood there, he people-watched. only a few lingered in the lobby. there was, of course, the bathroom line, and there were people buying snacks.

he was quick when using the bathroom, kind of hoping not to miss it before the play started. he wondered if annie had also made her way back to the stage or if she was still wandering around the lobby. he wanted to talk to her face to face today at least. he didn’t want to settle for the short texts between them. he wouldn’t call her either; those calls never came around unless it was her telling him to meet her.

armin walked a few steps around the lobby, scanning for any trace of the blonde. there was a slight desperation on his face. if he couldn’t imagine talking to her now, just to show his admiration, would they ever have a real conversation? he wanted so badly to talk to her as freely as reiner and bertolt did. what could be so good about those two that annie ruined what he and she had with them? whatever it was, armin needed it. he craved to be where they were.

in the midst of his waiting—waiting for something, anything—something came. it came in the form of small vibrations in his pocket. armin picked up his phone as it lit up. he read the name that caused his heart to skip a beat, along with those words he’d gotten so used to reading: “meet me here,” followed by the location of an empty staff room.

armin stared at the screen before turning off his phone. he stuffed it back in his pocket as he walked further down the lobby. he quietly opened a set of doors that looked like they would creak and catch everyone's attention. he closed them gently as his back faced the room he entered. as he heard the click of the door, he turned around to be met with annie.

armin was at her beck and call. he’d come to somehow look forward to these moments. moments that still seemed surrounded by the thought of reiner and bertolt. moments that seemed to question who annie truly saw, if what armin offered her would ever match up to reiner and bertolt. was he ever going to be enough to keep her entertained? he was drowning in the warm but uncharted waters that was annie.

there wasn’t an exchange of words. the only sounds to fill the room were their quiet breaths and the sound of quick movements.

…

the show looked like it was going to start soon enough. the lights started to dim again as the audience grew quieter.

“armin ain’t making it back before the curtains open again,” connie said with a slight frown. he leaned on the edge of his seat while scanning all the doors. armin seemed really excited to see the show as well.

ashley whispered a reminder to connie as she leaned forward to face him. “i mean, he did say not to wait up…”

the curtains started to open as soon as she finished. nobody spoke a word as the play was back in full force. eren and mikasa were a little sad armin would miss out, but armin had acknowledged he’d miss a few minutes. as they all focused on the play, eren and mikasa seemed to notice they hadn’t seen annie either. she wasn’t a big part, but it looked like she also wasn’t helping backstage anymore. she disappeared within that intermission.

eren gulped down the anxiety growing in his throat. he wouldn’t be that unhinged to do that. armin could be with annie right now. right? marco, sasha, ashley, and connie were immersed in the play. their eyes were glued to the stage as they soon forgot how long it had been since armin was out.

mikasa glanced over at eren next to her. his mood seemed to shift completely, his face covered in shame. she was confused for a second before eren looked at her. she could tell something was wrong from the look in his eyes. mikasa was smart and started to piece together that it had something to do with annie and armin. her face dropped as she gave eren a stern look, saying, “you’re gonna tell me after.”

eren knew he was going to break his promise to armin, but there wasn’t anything he felt he could do. he cared about armin, and so did mikasa. he was more worried about how much armin would get chewed out by her.

…

annie put on her shirt and tried to iron out the wrinkles with her hands. “thanks for that.” she faced a small mirror against the wall as she tried to fix her disheveled appearance. her back was toward armin as he watched her through the reflection.

armin slowly started to pull himself together as he continued to stare at annie. “yea… ahh,” he scratched his neck as he tried to brush his hair with his fingers. “i just—i wanted to say you did a good job with the choreo. i could tell you put effort into it.”

at his compliment, annie froze a little. her movements slowed down as she glanced at armin over her shoulder shyly. she flashed him a small smile at the acknowledgment.

he smiled back fixing his glasses as his chest tightened a little. her shyness reminded him of who she used to be when they first started dating. it was a reminder that his girl still held some of the same old habits.

after a few silent minutes of both of them fixing themselves, annie placed her hand on the doorknob. “ima head out first. wait like five minutes, k?” she didn’t turn her back as she continued to check herself out while she talked. armin could only offer a low, “mhm, got it.”

annie went to turn the handle before pausing in her tracks. she turned back and gave armin a quick peck on the side of his mouth. before he had the chance to react, she was already out the door. he was certainly caught off guard. all he could do was touch the area she kissed as he mumbled a quiet bye.

armin was left in the room alone. it was empty and stuffy as he counted the seconds ticking by. annie could so easily leave him like it was nothing. it wasn’t anything new, though. she did the same when they broke up. the electricity of when they got together always seemed to fade after it was over. armin could feel so alive sometimes and feel hollow the next.

he wished the feeling could always last the same way it was dragged out of him with you. you always knew how to make him feel like he wasn’t so alone. annie’s presence was only temporary when he wished it was permanent. he wished he could be reiner or bertolt just to relive it, only for a little while. he wanted to be someone she was able to keep by her side and not toss away so easily.

why was it so easy for others to outdo him? why wasn’t he better than reiner and bertolt? there had to be something that he couldn’t see; even you saw it when you dated reiner.

what was so bad about armin that he couldn’t receive the same amount of love that he gave out? was it his personality, his hobbies, his hair, his face, his body? the hollowness ate him alive as he tried to fill it with self-reassurance that was never enough. nothing he did ever seemed like enough.

armin’s time was up. he headed back to his friends, to the audience. he left the shadows and closed doors that seemed to be the only place annie could acknowledge him.

9:58 pm, after show

the lobby and outside the theater had crowds forming as people filed out of their seats. the lobby was full of flowers and compliments from audience members. the sounds of their praise echoed through the big halls. there were people surrounding backstage members as well as the onstage actors. everyone seemed to be getting their flowers for their efforts.

you and jean were finally able to get out and were showered with questions and compliments all over again. all your friends seemed to be in awe of how good the show was. a good amount of them weren’t theater “geeks,” but they claimed their lives were changed in that room. everyone seemed to crowd around you and jean as armin was quieter than usual. he’d been the most excited to watch, but something was off.

as everyone was absorbed with jean and you, armin took a glance at the other people in the lobby. he saw reiner and bertolt standing around the doors of the theater they had exited. he knew what they were doing. they were waiting for annie with flowers. they were waiting to talk to her all about the show, how they felt about the entire thing, and ask her all the questions that would make her smile reach her eyes.

armin scanned them for a while before seeing annie emerge from the theater. she had a few people surrounding her, talking to her intently while motioning moves from the show. she had a content smile on her face as she nodded along to whatever they were saying.

as she caught sight of reiner and bertolt, her eyes lit up. she excused herself as she joined them. she gave the two of them a side hug as they handed her the flowers. they conversed a little before making their way through the crowd that grew thinner.

armin watched from afar as both reiner and bertolt followed annie, letting her pave their path instead of them pushing through as most would. their hands stayed lightly planted on her waist and shoulder. annie kept looking back every now and then, assuring they were still there. the three of them were in their own world, all accounting for each other. it was as though there was a bubble nobody could intrude on. there was no room for such a thing to happen.

in armin’s daze, three pairs of eyes met. it was only a few seconds before armin broke away. his ears flushed red and his glasses fogged up as his breath caught in his chest. something about their small interaction spoke to him. they knew. they knew about armin and annie still hooking up, but they didn’t care. their eyes told him they didn’t see him as a threat, as competition. they saw him as just a warm body.

armin stared at his slightly scuffed converses and felt winded. they didn’t see him as anything. they saw past him. was there something wrong with him to think there was a possibility annie could make enough room to keep him close to her again? there was enough room for him before. he could squeeze into the space again.

armin’s head was filled with resentment, resentment toward reiner and bertolt. he wouldn’t let those two count him out. he’d show them there was room for him. there had to be. who did they think they were?

the daze he was in was interrupted by jean waving his hand in front of armin’s face. “are you good? you look kinda sick.” everyone’s attention was on armin now.

his face shifted into a mask of normalcy. “i’m good. i think it’s just too many people. got me feeling kinda claustrophobic.” he fanned himself with his hands as your worried face studied him.

“you’re right, let’s get outta here. let’s hit waffle house to celebrate,” sasha suggested as everyone made their way toward the exit. you wrapped your arms around yourself as the cold night air hit your skin.

ashley narrowed her eyes as she questioned sasha. “i feel like you’re only recommending that cus you’re hungry.”

sasha didn’t say anything as her stomach grumbled in response. you all filed into separate cars. marco and jean rode with mikasa and sasha since they trusted her driving more. you, ashley, and connie rode with armin and eren.

ashley called shotgun, refusing to be stuck in the back with connie as he laid his sleeping body on her. armin ended up stuck between you and connie as eren drove.

eren was busy conversing with ashley in the front seat while a sleeping connie laid his head against the window. you sat next to armin as he watched the road ahead. the expression on his face was different as you studied him.

you traced lines on his hand resting on his lap. he tensed at the sudden touch but slowly eased up. he looked at you with those stress-filled eyes. maybe seeing those three tonight was too much for him. it couldn’t have been easy. he laid his head on your shoulder as he rested his eyes.

your hand found its way to his face as you softly stroked it, offering some relief. armin leaned into your touch more as you ran your hand through his hair. slipping off his glasses and placing them onto your lap you let him get more comfortable. you always knew how to make him feel at ease.

armin slowly opened his eyes as he met your gaze. your eyes held genuine concern for him, making him let out a breath that seemed to carry heavy weight with it. his head still buzzed, but for now it was quieter. your presence filled him with warmth.

your hand stayed on his face as he reached for it. his hand covered yours as he held it and gave it a soft kiss. he gave you one last glance before closing his eyes again. you brushed pieces of his hair behind his ear as you watched him breathe soft breaths. his lashes rested against his cheeks, smushed into your shoulder.

it felt like it was just you two in the back of the packed car. you felt like he’d grown comfortable being vulnerable with you. he didn’t have to say a word before you were right there, waiting for him.

12:36 am

mikasa stuck to what she had telepathically told eren. he spilled about the annie situation, but not about you. armin made him promise not to tell anybody about you, but he never said the same for annie. eren also took this as a chance to tell armin what he did.

safe to say, armin had the talking-to of his life. mikasa and eren both tried to reason with him again, but it didn’t matter. armin’s reasoning was valid, but they knew him. they had known him since they were young. they knew him through and through. they couldn’t help but let armin off for the last time. all they could hope for was that he moved on in his own way.

eren thought of you and what armin was thinking. armin had a don’t ask, don’t tell rule. it had always been his boundary, especially when dealing with stressful situations. eren could only hope armin was being smart.