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Hate. Let me tell you how much I've come to hate golf since I began to live. There are roughly 2.25 million acres of land dedicated to golfing in the United States of America. If the word 'hate' was engraved on each blade of grass in those millions of acres, it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for golf courses at this micro-instant. For golf. Hate. Hate.
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Why I hate Golf
This is the Takapuna Golf Course in Auckland, New Zealand.
It is in the middle of Auckland's north shore suburbs.
According to their website, they are one of the most popular golf courses in Aotearoa and have an annual visitor count of 60,000 people. They don't clarify if that is individual unique visitors or recounts, but lets be generous and say its unique visitors. 60,000, not bad.
This is Eden Park Stadium (the little square on the right) and oh look there's another golf course on the left there, ignore that one for now.
(the above two images are at the same scale)
Eden park has a capacity of 50,000 people. Ed Sheeran was here earlier this year and sold out the two nights he performed. That's 100,000 people in a weekend all in that little red square. 60,000 in a year no longer seems so great.
60,000 people per year is also only 160 people per day. 160 visitors to a golf course that is 470,000 square meters in area. Now the average property size in Auckland is 500 square meters. So the golf course takes up the area of 940 houses.
940 homes worth of land for 160 people.
And that is Auckland housing sizes. Auckland is horribly designed and very spread out. Let's instead look at Barcelona, considered one of the most well designed cities in the world.
This is Takapuna golf course side by side with Barcelona
(The scale is as close to being equal as I could get them, I don't have ArcGIS data for Barcelona so had to use google maps)
Each red square overlaid on Takapuna Golf Course is exactly 133m in height/width, the same size as each city block in Barcelona, road width included.
There are 23 Barcelona blocks worth of space in Takapuna Golf Course with room to spare. About 640 people live in each Barcelona block, that's 15000 people.
15000 peoples worth of homes and living spaces, sacrificed so 160 people can play golf in a day.
Now this is just one golf course in a big city, what's 15,000 people to a city of 1.6 million, who cares right?
Here is a wider shot of Auckland City.
Those red dots? They're golf courses.
There are 16 golf courses inside the metropolitan area of Auckland City (4 not pictured as Auckland is too spread out to get one clean screenshot). Keep in mind these are not rural golf courses out in the country, these are right beside housing developments and shopping malls. And for the record I could not find a single golf course in the Barcelona metropolitan area, you had to go out into the country before finding one.
So lets multiply that 15,000 people by 16 golf courses?
240,000 people.
With Auckland City's golf courses you could house 240,000 people comfortably with some good urban planning.
That is why I hate golf.
I will not be content until every golf course in the world is destroyed
I still can’t stop laughing about how Planet Zoo announced they were adding the Collared Peccary to the game in a free anniversary update around the same time a famous golf course in Arizona got destroyed by a herd of foraging Javelinas.
(Photo credit: Em Casey)
Maybe don’t build a massive golf course in the middle of the desert and get mad when the animals whose habitat you destroyed come back to forage for food and ruin your precious water-wasting invasive grass turf.
The fucking government is trying to brainwash us into thinking the Ryder cup being here in 2027 is a good thing when already landlords are evicting people in Limerick and Clare to convert their homes into accomodation for rich yanks and brits coming here for it, "oh but it's going to support small businesses" lol, lmao, do you really think these rich bastards are gonna be going to the small working class chippers and shit, lmao, I think the evictions are the actual thing that's going to effect normal people, also like, golf is just terrible for the environment and normal people
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Golfers should sincerely find another hobby. There are so many hit-ball sports that don't require the mass destruction of native habitats, and the maintenance of large swaths of land that could otherwise be utilized to vitalize a community.
Frisbee golf ✔️
Trees
Flowers
General Biodiversity
Bugs
Creatures
Fun with friends
Ball golf ❌
Ecological desert
Ugly
Boring
Rich people
Golf Courses: wastes of land and water, unimaginative monocultures, fertilizer runoff contributing to algal superblooms, use of chemicals ending in -cide -ciding native flora and fauna, commonly used as set pieces for bourgeoisie hierarchical power struggles, corporate ownership divesting resources from local economies, prohibitive expense as a barrier to access, invasive and m u l t i p l y i n g,
Minigolf Courses: small footprint, can whimsically reclaim disused spaces, alternative turf (including artificial) acceptably substituted to match local water/ecological resources, greater potential for creative planting design, carnivalesque (affectionate), sustainable independent operation by local small businesses wards off consolidation, goofy proletariat fun for every age and class, endemic to the Myrtle Beach region (for some reason), IUCN endangered almost everywhere else,
