#gintana

“Alright guys, listen. Today’s meeting is a special one.” Principal Hata stood in front of the admittedly small staff in the teachers lounge of Gintama High School. It was the rare case where everyone showed up on time, but as always no one was listening.

When principal Baka - eh principal Hata looked around the room, no set of eyes in the room was directed at him. Two pairs were hidden behind thick issues of the newest JUMP, not even caring about what was happening around them, pointing at each other's issues from time to time.  

One pair was hidden by dark shaded sunglasses and his sitting position indicated that he was probably asleep. A sudden loud snore confirmed the assumption.

Another one was concentrated on the wood desk in front of him, holding his keys in his hands, waiting for Hata to turn around so he could continue to deface school properties.

From the last one pair of eyes in the room, he couldn’t even make out where they were looking since he had his back turned to him.

“Gentlemen, this is important," he repeated his attempt to get their attention. But it was futile, it was like talking to toddlers.

“Nothing ever is important in this room,” Ginpachi snorted from behind the magazine.

It was lame as ever, dull as ever. Nothing mattered in school full of bad characters and hyperactive kids.

“What was that, Sakata Sensei?”  

Ginpachi who had his head behind the newest JUMP didn’t even look up and pretended he didn’t say anything. Leisuring next to him was Zenzou who snickered silently into his issue when he heard Ginpachi’s comment.

“Stop making a fool out of me and listen to me!” Hata was getting angry, but no one cared.

“This week's chapter of PunterxPunter is pretty lame, huh?” Ginpachi said to his neighbor.

“It’s not, you just don’t have taste in anything. No taste in food, no taste in a good story, no taste in women -”

“Yea yea I get it, shut up,” Ginpachi felt insulted. What did this hentai protagonist look-alike knew about good taste or women anyways.

A loud snore from Matsudaira interrupted his thoughts and he fixed his eyes on the little speech bubbles again. Hatas bantering didn’t even reach his ears anymore, he had successfully managed to fade it out.

Sadly however, he couldn’t drown out the annoying laughter of his old classmate and he sighed when the sound reached his ears.  

Sakamoto giggled and scratched something into his desk now that Hata had turned around to grumble to himself.

“Kintoki, Kintoki, look!” He whispered, leaning over to Ginpachi, pointing at his desk with his keys.

“Who’s Kintoki. That’s not even close to my name,” he replied without looking up from the printed pages.

“Look!” Sakamoto slid closer to him, dragging the table with him to give him an easier view. Ginpachi glanced over at his stupid face and down to the table. He couldn’t stop the frown creeping onto his face.

“A Neo Armstrong Cyclone Jet Armstrong, wow, very great artistic expression Tatsuma,” he grumbled and stuck a finger up his nose.

“Kintoki, how can you say that, can’t you recognize it? That’s clearly your pe-”

“Hrm Hrm,” Hata cleared his throat. “Gentlemen!”

“Look, it even has the right size..,” Sakamoto added silently, which earned him a pen to the face from Ginpachi.

“Oi!” he protested.

"What? It’s your own fault.” Ginpachi mumbled while looking at a panel of Pisokas glowing magic wand.  

Impressive. A glowing dick would actually be pretty useful.

This weeks issue really was lame, but it was good to pass the time.

“Aren't ya excited?” Zenzou lifted his head from his JUMP and turned it to Ginpachi.

“Heh, what?” Ginpachi was confused. Excited about what? What did he miss?

“Didn’t you listen?” Zenzou furrowed his brows.

“No, of course not. And since when do you listen to anything this weird looking dude says?”

“I always do, you’re the one who’s not listening. I always have to give you a complete rundown of the meetings.”

“Tch..” Zenzou was right, but Ginpachi didn’t want to admit it. “What was it?”

“We’re getting a new colleague.”

“And why should that interest me?”

“It’s not gonna be a full blown sausage party anymore.”

“What does that even mean?”

"Just take a look around this room."

Ginpachi didn't feel the need to do that, so he just continued to stare at the brown bangs.

“We’re getting a female teacher for physical and health education,” Zenzou said eagerly.

“But don’t we already have that old drunk man over there for PE?” Ginpachi pointed out.

“And? He’s probably gonna die soon, so we need new teachers anyways. PE and Health teacher, sounds sexy, huh?” Zenzou's face appeared a little dreamily, but you could never exactly tell what he was thinking with his hair in front of his eyes.

“Whatever,” Ginpachi replied uninterested and lifted his JUMP demonstratively in front of his face again.

That’s such a drag.

He never loved anyone, he never had eyes for anyone.

Nothing would change.

Zenzou likewise turned back to his copy and grumbled something incoherent, probably an insult.

“Now.. she will be here soon. Could you at least behave like adults?" Hata was close to pleading.

“Hey Ginpachi wouldn’t it be funny if it was someone from our school days. Didn’t we have someone in class who wanted to become a teacher? Can’t remember the name though,” Sakamoto commented to Ginpachi.

Why is everyone bothering me today, let me read my JUMP in peace!

“If she’s single, we should maybe make a game out of who can go on a date with her first ahahaha” Sakamoto laughed annoyingly and Ginpachi frowned, disgusted at this tasteless comment.

“That’s creepy and awful Tatsuma, how much of an asshole can you be?!”

“Ah c’mon Ginpachi, just because you can’t land any dates doesn’t mean others can’t,” Sakamoto reached over to pat his shoulder, but he slapped it away.

“I’m not - ah whatever, believe what you want,” he grumbled.

The meeting continued with Hata explaining more "important" details about the new teacher and next week's activities. The sports festival was coming closer, but of course no one cared about that. Only time will tell how this horrible idea of the classes fighting each other would turn out.

Ginpachi didn’t realize the door opening for a new person to enter the room until he heard a loud rattling sound from the desk next to him. Sakamoto's glasses had fallen off his nose and his jaw had dropped, staring to the front of the room.

Loud clicking from expensive sounding heels echoed through the staff room and Ginpachi finally lifted his eyes from the magazine.

What he saw there, in front of him, in a figure-hugging pencil skirt, a pale purple blouse and a white lab coat knocked the air out of his lungs in an instant. Violently he started to cough and bend in his chair, the JUMP falling out of his hands to the ground.

Hattori looked up from his copy and eyed him angrily at the sudden noise disturbance.

“Get yourself together, what’s wrong?” and if he noticed just now the new arrival in the room, he looked to the front of the room and back to the vigorously coughing Ginpachi whose face turned redder and redder due to the lack of fresh air.

The room started to spin around Ginpachi and he slipped off his chair to the floor, landing on his ass, propped up on his arms, still staring to the front.

All eyes were on him, but he was only looking at her.

Ginpachi locked eyes with brightly shimmering amethyst and after a good minute his coughing finally stopped. Sharply, he took a deep breath to calm himself down.

Hata looked at him in confusion as he waited for him to stop making such noise before he continued:

“This is your new colleague -”

“ - Tsukuyo?”