Legolas: you could be having some fun too if you were into elves

Aragorn: I am into elves

Gimli: so am I!

Aragorn: I am into girls!

Legolas: Boo-Hoo!

Gimli: so am I!

Legolas: so are you what

Gimli: into girls!

Gimli: ain’t that obvious?

Legolas: no

Aragorn: *to Gimli* Legolas loves you

Gimli: I am going to boil us some fine dwarf sausage

Legolas: and I will drink the water from it

Aragorn: wait was that a sex thing

Gimli: *holding a little pot* what

[ WIP ] Thorin/Bilbo | Legolas/Gimli | (More) | NC-17

Legolas and Bilbo are roommates. They have dwarf boyfriends. (Or, rather, Bilbo does and Legolas desperately wishes he did. And he will. Eventually.)

Gimli/Legolas | NC-17 | 1248

Starlight is one thing, even moonlight he'd grown accustomed to…

Gimli isn't used to sleeping next to a being that literally glows.

I wrote these for Tru last night, but I'll link them here as well.

Spoils :: Thor/Loki | G | 290 | Arranged Marriage

The Asgardians have defeated them. To save himself, Laufey offers the hand of his smallest son.

Bearing :: Arthur/Eames | PG | 250 | (Pseudo) Mpreg

Arthur isn't sure if Eames is kidding.

Burden :: Thorin/Bilbo | NC-17 | 1180 | Fuck Or Die | Dub/Non-Con*

If the only other option is to watch Bilbo die, Thorin will accept his hatred.

Lesson :: Peter/Wade | PG(-13) | 208 | Fluff

Wade wants sex. Peter wants breakfast. Okay, Wade also wants breakfast. (Peter will accept sex.)

Of Coffee, Beards, and Braids :: Gimli/Legolas | G | 667 | College AU

Copying Shakespeare with a pen tool on a tablet is hard.