Oct 30, 2019
h
why is writing so HARD,,
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h
why is writing so HARD,,
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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the host can eat paper.
do you think Wilford buys him notebooks so he has something to eat or
"hello night time my old friend
its time for me to sleep again" (◡ ω ◡)
meowgon replied to your post:stares at gatchaman group buy and frets loudly ...
do it
stares at claude
youre still picking out stuff for my present right
ohgosh how do you ask someone to Rp with you without being all nervous and gjkfdhjkgfjkfjkhgjkfd
-rolls away-
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
like, i have to fight with myself to be able to express any sexual feelings that directly involve me and my body in some way, even just "i'd fuck this fictional character" instead of "these fictional characters should fuck each other," for a long time i forced myself to pretend i could be so angelically selfless and only ever want to please others--which is a legitimate inclination of course, for people who identify as stone butch and/or on the ace spectrum and the like--but i only felt that way because i convinced myself it was selfish and harmful and gross to act like i could deserve physical/sexual attention. gee who does that sound a bit like. but forcing myself to shy away from any of those thoughts didnt keep me from having them, i could mostly redirect my sexuality into avenues that didnt scare me but i couldnt turn it off, and trying to jump through those hoops was really fucking bad for me!!!
and i'm not all that far into recovering from it yet, ive been scared of seeming presumptuous and selfish for wanting sexual attention/reciprocation for basically my entire life with some periods where it's gotten really acute; i get very anxious when expressing things i'm not used to allowing myself to think much about, but the thoughts are going to happen whether i feel allowed to have them or not and the answer isn't giving in to anxiety and pushing them away, it's to try to get comfortable with myself because i deserve that, so i just--
it's fucking porn, the entire point is wish-fulfillment, let it be so for the characters too, don't fucking complain about it being out of character for someone to get to feel better about themselves, everyone has the capacity to improve everyone deserves to be happy no one should be locked away in a box of "sorry you're too sad to be sexual" just because it seems in-character for them to impose that shit on themselves, by all means go ahead and explore that complex (if you know what you're fucking talking about, that is), but don't put others down for letting characters with self-worth issues want things and then receive them, goddamn
The fact that Austin Carlile was dead for two hours because of his heart surgery just makes him seem like even more of an angel.