Carrying your luggage behind you, you stepped off of the train and quickly read over Gerri’s texts. As per her instructions, you should be stepping off from Platform Five before turning left, taking an escalator, then going through the station until you reached Gate Three.

You’d been so excited to see her that you had even searched up pictures of the station, meticulously planning out what it would feel like to finally be meeting up with your best friend after parting from each other at the end of the summer. Though you were still worried about getting lost, you followed the instructions Gerri messaged you and finally made it to the front of the station.

In the middle of typing a text to her letting her know you were waiting at the front parking lot, you heard someone call out to you from the far left and you turned to see Gerri waving at you.

It had only been a few months since you last saw each other, but Gerri looked different. Her hair, that was now a few inches longer than you could last remember, was styled differently, and in a subtle way, the way she did her makeup seemed different too. 

But she looked so pretty.

Gerri always looked so pretty.

You embraced each other and she uttered into your shoulder, “I’ve missed you so much.”

“I missed you too,” you replied, feeling a warm comfort settle within you at the feeling of being with your best friend again. 

Her hair smelled like mangoes, so you supposed she was still using the same kind of shampoo. That made you happy, in a way. 

She pulled away from you and took your backpack from your shoulder. She carried it for you while you wheeled your small travel luggage behind you. “There’s a ton I wanna catch you up on, but David’s friend is waiting in the car for us and I don’t wanna keep him waiting,” she told you and you walked beside her and into the parking lot.

“David? Like, the same guy from summer?”

Gerri looked over at you with a grin that made her look proud of herself. “Yeah,” she answered. “I forgot to tell you, but one of my roommates knows someone who’s rooming with a guy that’s close friends with David, so I saw him at some frat party. He’s visiting the US and he’s been staying with Sam — the guy who drove me here.”

You felt a bit lightheaded trying to catch up with the sudden dump of details of all these people Gerri knew, and as if mind wasn’t already struggling to keep up, she added, “When we get back, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

Trying not to sound too confused and consequently bitter, you asked, “Everyone…?”

The both of you reached the car and Gerri helped you tuck your things away in the trunk while she answered, “There are a few people back at my place right now, but they’re just friends of mine and Zoey.”

You’ve heard of Zoey before. She was Gerri’s roommate. But the last you heard about her, Gerri had been having issues with rooming with her. You supposed they got along now, but you weren’t sure when that started happening.

“You’ll like them,” she reassured, squeezing your upper arm supportively then getting into the passenger’s seat after your luggage was tucked away in the trunk. 

You watched as she buckled her seatbelt and turned her head to start a conversation you couldn’t hear with Sam, and for a moment you wondered if it would’ve been better for you to stay somewhere else. But when Gerri looked at you through the side mirror and gestured for you to get into the car, you smiled and felt encouraged.

Though you certainly weren’t in the mood for socialising and all you’d really wanted to do was spend the day alone with Gerri at her place watching movies and getting takeout like you always would, the way she turned around and asked you if you wanted to stop for anything made you think that it wouldn’t be… that bad.

As long as you were with her.

Sam carried your things up and Gerri told you a bit about her friends as you trailed behind. She told you what she thought of them and whether or not she thought you’d like them. There were a few of them you were almost excited to meet — Winona and Caroline — but you still checked the time on your phone before the door to her dorm was unlocked as you tried to estimate what time it would be that everyone would go home.

It was three in the afternoon and they must’ve gotten there a few hours prior to when you arrived at the station, so it couldn’t be more than four or five hours until they left if they wanted to stay for dinner.

You were wrong about that.

Or just disillusioned to begin with.

Gerri’s idea of ‘a few people’ meant enough people that the entire living room was stuffy with a crowd of people, all of them friends or at least friends of mutual friends, where the balcony was polluted with cigarette and joint smoke and the kitchen and dining room was littered with students that were afternoon-drinking. 

Everywhere you turned there were conversations and commentary on things like consumerism and classic literature and film that you realised people thought were the pinnacle of what it meant to be an artistic and well-spoken individual interacting with other artistic and well-spoken individuals.

And Gerri… Where was Gerri?

It was nearly nine now and you’d only seen her a few times since you entered through the door together with Sam. You got by without her by taking frequent trips to the washroom, unpacking your things as slowly as you could, and even taking a walk around the neighbourhood during which you stopped for a pack of beer at a convenience store so you had an excuse for if anyone noticed your absence.

No one did, but it got you a few good first impressions when you set it down on the kitchen counter.

Caroline ended up being sort of annoying, and you were glad when Winona came around for it was right after Caroline said something vaguely elitist that you would have struggled to say something useful in response to had it not been for Winona coming around with a can of Smirnoff Ice for you, asking if you were Gerri’s friend.

She was nice and you did enjoy her company for a while until you finished your drink and kept seeing brief glances of Gerri before she quickly disappeared beyond the crowd of people each time.

Standing in the open kitchen and having watched Gerri pass you countless times without seeming to be looking for you, you suddenly felt a bit down and even kind of tired.

It was ten in the evening by the time you told Winona you needed to talk to Gerri, and you bid a goodbye to perhaps the only person you enjoyed talking with that entire day after exchanging numbers with each other.

Feeling pretty tipsy and rather sleepy, you slid your way through the crowd of people and finally made your way to Gerri’s side. She was talking with David and Sam and another taller guy that looked sort of nice because he had a crooked tie and a pair of aviator glasses on, but you didn’t pay much mind to anyone but Gerri once you got the closest you’ve been with her since the afternoon.

“I was looking for you!” she said when she turned to you, a red solo cup in her hand. You couldn’t find it in yourself to be upset with her, but maybe you would’ve been annoyed at the very least if you were sober. She introduced you to her friends.

“Nice seeing you again, Y/N,” you heard David greet you.

You weren’t sure if you actually responded to him, but you thought you did. Either way, you told Gerri, “I think I’m just gonna head to bed early, Ger. Sorry. I’m just tired from the train. Is there something I can set up in your room or is there a guest room?”

“Shit, I forgot to set your things up,” she hissed then looked into the hallway where her bedroom was. “There’s, uh, a cot or something in the closet but… Well, it’s fine, you can sleep in my bed. Do you need help unpacking?”

“No, I unpacked earlier. Thanks,” you replied, and that time you knew for sure that you said something to her friends for you waved them goodbye and told them you hoped to see them again, which was completely disingenuous.

Earlier when you unpacked, you looked through Gerri’s things, but seeing her bedroom from your position on her bed made things look different. It was like you could see things from her eyes as you looked around at her desk and her books and her posters, smelling the scent of her hair and a bit of her perfume from her pillows, bringing her blanket up to your shoulders and imagining it was her wrapped around your body.

Then you forgot about Gerri and who she seemed to be earlier — someone completely different, a version of her that you felt distant from. Laying in her bed surrounded by nothing but her in the dark silence of her bedroom, the sounds of the party muffled, you truly felt like you had come home to her like you had wanted when you got off the train.

Before you fell asleep, you saw your phone light up with the notification that Winona requested to follow your Instagram account. 

That made you feel pretty good.

Gerri must’ve gone to bed late for you didn’t notice that she got into bed with you until the next morning when you woke up and felt her mess of wavy brown hair stretched out against your bare clavicle and tickling your skin. She was facing you, her hand tucked under her cheek and her other arm draped around her clothed midriff.

She was now wearing an old shirt she’d gotten with you when you went to Venice Beach together one summer, and it made you smile when you realised how worn it had gotten over the years of usage.

Watching her tranquil sleeping expression and listening to the soft inhales and exhales of her sleeping form reminded you of all the times you’d slept over at her place. You’d been friends with Gerri since childhood, but you were mostly thinking of the time you spent together before the school year started.

It felt like things changed last summer, though you couldn’t exactly place a finger on how. Maybe it had been the knowledge that you were going to move away from each other in September, but you just saw Gerri differently.

It was warmer when you were with her and she felt dearer to you. Your heart would beat nearly twice as fast sometimes when she got close enough to you. That summer, things were just lighter and gentler, things smelled sweeter and the time spent with Gerri felt… perfect.

Everything that summer was perfect.

While watching her in the peaceful silence of her bedroom, you felt like things really were as they used to be for the first time since both you and Gerri moved away.

And that made you really, really happy.

Gerri stirred and she rolled onto her back, groaning softly and rubbing her face before stretching her arms upwards. She went limp for a few moments as her arms laid back above her head. Then she rubbed her eyes and opened them as she exhaled softly. She turned to you, meeting your eyes as you were on your side looking at her.

You felt like she was really looking at you now, her undivided attention on you. Ever since you met up with her at the station, it felt like she was always thinking about something else — anything else but you.

“I’m sorry about the party last night,” Gerri said quietly the moment she turned onto her side, bringing her knees up and tucking a hand under her pillow. “I really didn’t expect for there to be so many people. When I left to pick you up, there were only a few friends here.”

Looking at her fresh morning face and her messy brown hair and listening to the soft rasp of her quiet voice made you feel so warm; you were completely willing to forget all about last night.

“I get it,” you replied with a supportive smile. “It’s totally fine. I’m just glad we get to have time to ourselves now.”

Gerri smiled then, and you felt yourself flush at the sight of her. 

“Besides, I sorta made a friend,” you added. “Winona and I exchanged numbers last night and she requested to follow my Instagram.”

Her face formed a bit of a dubious expression when you said that. “Really?” she asked. “She, like, never talks. She’s Sam’s cousin but we’ve had probably about two conversations since I first met her in October.”

“I wouldn’t have thought her to be the quiet type,” you said. “She was super nice and talkative with me.”

There was a momentary indiscernible look on her face before she redirected her focus and started talking about something else. “Do you wanna go for lunch?” she proposed after checking the time on her phone and seeing that it was eleven in the afternoon. “There’s a really good all-day breakfast place I know.”

The both of you got dressed together in the same room while talking about Gerri’s classes and how you felt about living alone and without a roommate. She talked about her parents visiting next weekend and how much she missed Poppy, the dog they’d just gotten before she had to leave for school.

Gerri was almost convinced that they bought her as her replacement while she was gone. But she didn’t care all that much; she was a good replacement. She ended up liking the chocolate lab quite a bit in spite of her lack of experience with pets.

You wondered if any of her other friends knew about Poppy and how Gerri initially hated when she licked at her face, and how she eventually warmed up to it to the point that she had the puppy sleeping in her bed nearly every night before she moved out.

There were a lot of things you knew about Gerri that you sort of hoped no one else knew about her. Last night, there was so much about her that you felt so distant from, like a large part of her was unknown to you. You could understand the rationality of it for it’d been a few months since you last saw her, and anyone’s first year would bring about some change.

But there were parts of Gerri you just wanted to yourself — parts of her that were genuinely, sincerely her.

A thought that made your chest tighten ran through your mind: What if who Gerri was had changed? 

What if there were parts of her you couldn’t get to know the way you used to know her? What if things could never be like how they used to?

The train of thought followed you all throughout the walk to the restaurant, but was discarded and momentarily forgotten when you and Gerri were seated at the all-day breakfast place she recommended.

For a little while as you went through the menu together, discussing what to order and bringing up shared memories that the both of you were reminded of the further your conversation progressed, things suddenly just felt so… natural and perfect.

Gerri laughed at something you said and you lifted your eyes from the menu in front of you to watch how a wide smile spread across her pretty lightly-freckled face still fresh of makeup. Her lively laugh relaxed into a soft fit of giggles and she met your eyes, which for an inexplicable reason made you flush and look back down to your menu.

After months of not seeing their best friend, anyone would’ve felt as eager as you to finally spend time with them. Maybe it was precisely because of the time you’d spent away from her that made things feel so different, but sitting across from Gerri, immersing yourself in the feeling of being the only person who had her attention, you felt that something had changed.

It wasn’t that things were in any way extraordinarily different, though you were sure at least some things had changed since the summer, but instead it was that something had changed within you. And it felt profound, in a way, and you wished to understand where the feeling had come from and what it meant, but before you could, someone approached the table and took Gerri’s focus away from you.

You didn’t pay much attention once Gerri exclaimed excitedly at the sight of the girl standing by your table, and instead you redirected your attention to your phone. You accepted Winona’s request from last night and followed her back, distractedly looking through her posts as you listened in on Gerri’s conversation. 

If you weren’t looking right at her while she was speaking, it was almost hard to tell that it was Gerri talking. She sounded different — the rises and falls in her tone, the vocabulary she used, the inside jokes she referenced that you didn't understand, and the people she talked about that you didn’t know.

A part of you tried to tell you how delusional and obsessive you were being, and that maybe you just felt insecure about not being as much a part of Gerri’s life as you used to. But even so, you couldn’t stop the angry bitter pit that formed in your stomach, sticking to your insides like hot tar the longer you listened to their conversation.

At one point or another, you had subtly reminded Gerri that you only had a week with her; there were only three days left in your stay, and the past two days were filled with what you could only describe as being forgotten about.

You understood that Gerri was still a full-time student with things to do and that she wasn’t going to drop everything just because you were visiting — although some selfish part of you did entertain the idea for a few minutes when you were on the train fantasising about your trip.

But the last two days, Gerri had sometimes left for classes while you were sleeping, leaving you alone to wake up to her roommate as your only company, or a completely empty place without so much as letting you know where she was or when she’d be back. She’d stay out for a few hours past the last of her classes to go out with her friends, leaving you back at her place like you were her pet.

There was one occasion that got you particularly upset when Gerri had left in the afternoon only for you to find that she had gone out to meet her friends at a cafe. It had only been for an hour or two but you felt disrespected and abandoned all the same.

The only thing that had brought you any form of comfort since your first night here was the returning feeling of having slept in Gerri’s bed that one night, the stillness and permanence of her in her books and blankets and posters, a side of her that you at the time had felt no one knew.

During your lonely hours away from her spending most of your time in her bedroom, you became curious at one point when you realised you hadn’t yet seen Gerri’s guitar. She used to practise nearly every day and since you’d arrived, you hadn’t seen her pick it up even once. 

You knew she brought it for when you hugged her goodbye the day that she left, she had her guitar carefully stored in the backseat in its protective casing. 

One evening you started looking for it and found it tucked away somewhere almost completely obscured in her closet behind her jackets and laying against the back panelling. 

It was true that there were some parts of Gerri you wanted all to yourself, and if she hadn’t played in a while let alone ever brought her guitar out, no one but you knew that she played nor that it was a hobby of hers. But seeing it stored away, almost hidden from everything… 

It felt different. 

It felt horrible.

When she came back that night you felt inexplicably bitter and cold to her, but if she noticed how upset you were she didn’t mention it.

An afternoon came when the two of you finally made plans to go out together on your own. In a few hours, you and Gerri were going to a drive-in theatre a city away. A movie from the film series the both of you used to love when you were younger had come out, and you were mostly seeing it for nostalgia’s sake, but also because you’d be able to spend time together.

Gerri was talking about what she did last night when she came back a bit later than she said she would, detailing her outing with David and Sam. 

There were two days left before you had to take the train back to your place, so although you were upset with Gerri, you were determined not to let anything ruin the last little while you had with her, even if that meant biting your tongue when she talked about things you would much rather not listen to and avoiding bringing up what you were upset about.

Trying to change the subject quickly while Gerri stopped talking to chew on a pizza bite, you said, “Winona said she might be in town, so we could hang out.”

She made a face as if what you said was funny and spoke with her mouth partially full, “We? Like, you and me?”

“No — her and I,” you replied. “‘In town’ meaning, like, my town. Where I live.”

Gerri chewed while she stared at you and you couldn’t decipher why it was so bizarre for her that you’d made a friend while you were here. Then she swallowed and lifted another pizza bite to her mouth before asking, “What do you even talk about with her? She’s super boring.”

“She’s not,” you defended, now feeling a bit agitated not because Gerri insulted Winona but because she was acting so oddly and you couldn’t understand why. “How would you know she’s boring if you never talk with her?”

“I don’t talk with her because she’s boring.”

Looking up from your phone, you answered, “Well, maybe she’s boring because she just doesn’t want to talk to you.”

Gerri put her hands up in sarcastic surrender. “Sorry,” she scoffed. “Didn’t know you were so close.”

Thankfully, before any sort of argument started, Zoey came out from her room and mentioned a frat party that was happening, and that the guys were friends with David and wanted to throw him a party before he had to leave for Paris.

You watched Gerri’s expression as Zoey gave her more details, and you watched how her mind seemed practically made up the moment she was told that her group of friends were going.

She didn’t even have to be asked to go before she said, “Yeah, okay, I’ll be there.” When you shifted in your spot, she looked over at you. “Oh, Y/N, you can come too. It'll be fun.”

An afterthought. 

That’s all you were to her.

What were you to do anyways if you didn’t go?

“I don’t know anyone going, Ger,” you told her nervously as you fiddled with the rings on your fingers.

“I’ll be there with you the whole time. It’s fine,” she tried to reassure you as the two of you and Zoey took the streetcar down to where the party was a few blocks away. “I’ve been to, like, hundreds of these. Y/N, you’ll like it.”

In spite of everything that had been happening the past few days, Gerri telling you that she’d be there with you for the party brought you… a lot of comfort. It made you feel like she knew how important it was to you that she was there with you, which almost sort of reestablished your relationship with her that you sometimes felt like she forgot about.

Maybe it was the feeling of being caught up in what Gerri told you on the way there, but when you were walking up to the frat house together, you didn’t think twice before telling her, “You look really pretty, Gerri.”

And she did look really pretty; you weren’t just saying it because of how you felt.

Gerri turned her head to look at you and you saw her eyes meet yours, her lips parting after a moment of looking your face over with a sincerity that seemed meaningful to you before Zoey opened the front door, inviting a rupture of noise and cheers onto the porch that stopped Gerri from saying whatever she was going to say.

Sam gave you a quick hello then pulled Gerri into the house at the sight of her and you followed behind her a bit uncomfortably, looking around at the crowds of people that was easily at least more than fifteen times the size of the party that you walked into when you first arrived.  

For the first hour and a half of the night, Gerri didn’t even look back at you trailing behind her wherever she went unless you were all doing shots together, most of which she did without you anyways. 

It seemed to you that she only paid you any attention when she could remember you were there.

When someone tapped you on the shoulder, you turned to see a familiar strawberry blonde standing behind you with a friendly sober smile. “I’ve been looking for you,” Winona said, and you felt comfortable believing her.

“It’s so chaotic here,” she told you, looking around at the bustling party. Then you realised for the first time that Gerri was telling the truth — she sort of was a bit of an introverted person. She never seemed like it until now. 

She looked back over to you. “There’s a small terrace on the roof. Wanna go up?”

“I thought I heard a few guys say they wanted to go for a smoke up there but couldn’t get the terrace door unlocked,” you recalled.

Winona gave you a small sly smile then reached into her jeans’ pocket and subtly flashed you a silver key before quickly sliding it back into her pocket. At the sight of your surprised expression, she said, “The key was hanging from a nail at the top of the doorframe.”

You laughed and she took your hand, pulling through the crowd of people and swiping a few things from the buffet counter in the kitchen before the both of you headed to the highest floor where the terrace door was.

Distracted by Winona, you hadn’t seen the way Gerri followed you with her eyes through the crowd, watching with scorn brewing in her chest the moment she saw your interlaced hands peek from between the crowd of people as you followed Sam’s cousin upstairs.

It was nearly two whole hours that you spent with Winona, and you really couldn’t believe it when you checked the time on your phone by chance when you got a notification.

“Is it really almost eleven now?” she asked, surprised. 

The pizza and drinks she brought up were long finished, and the two of you didn’t drink even once. You’d sobered up from the shots earlier, and it felt so nice to finally have a sincere conversation with someone.

Winona was nice. She was creative and sensitive and, for whatever reason, she very obviously held you in high regards. 

You enjoyed talking with her and you felt a bit terrible for being what you could only describe as pessimistic, but there was something she was missing that you just felt you needed to have. She was nice for conversations and in every platonic sense, and you could see yourself enjoying her company in your future too. 

But there was a figure that formed in your mind each time she flushed at your inadvertent compliments and the nervous way she played with the sleeves of her shirt when she said she couldn’t help but stalk your Instagram a little when you first accepted her request.

A figure that stood out starkly from Winona took shape in your mind. But you couldn’t figure out who it was, only that Winona could never fill it.

So when she leaned forward and tried to kiss you when the two of you stood and went to step down from the terrace so she could go home and study for a midterm that she had in the morning, you turned your head the slightest bit, allowing her lips to just miss yours, but enough for her to get the point.

“I’m sorry,” she quickly apologised. “I’m sorry, I must have misread things…”

You quickly reassured her and reached out for her hand which she nearly pulled away from you before she let you take it. “No, it’s fine. You’re fine,” you said.

“I didn’t make this weird, did I?” she asked. “I mean… It’s not uncomfortable now, is it?”

Your heart was pained when you watched her guilty eyes meet yours. She really was so nice. But… you couldn’t do it. 

Not with her. 

“No, you didn’t. It’s totally, totally fine,” you told her. “You’re a really cool person, Winona, and I’m so glad to have met you while visiting here. But, I…”

Her eyes searched yours before she said, “But you like someone else.”

You weren’t sure if that was true or not. So you just looked at her in a helpless sort of way. “I don’t know,” you answered. “I’m just sorry, I don’t want to make you feel embarrassed or upset.”

Winona shook her head. “I’m not. I’ll get over it. You’re… really cool too,” she admitted. “I can still visit you, right? And we’re still friends?”

Nodding, you answered confidently, “Yeah. Of course.”

You navigated your way to the back door for Winona to be able to leave quietly. She didn’t live closeby, and was only staying with Sam while she visited for his birthday. So you waited with her while her Uber came so she didn’t have to take public transport. You told her that you’d text her when you were back home, and that you’d plan a weekend together where she could stay at your place.

You felt pretty satisfied for having handled that the way you did, and you were happy that you were still friends with Winona. 

Feeling pretty fired up from the interaction and perhaps a bit inspired by Winona’s attempt to kiss you and the overt intimacy that came with it, you decided to talk with Gerri. 

You weren’t sure what you would say nor what kinds of feelings you’d be trying to convey to her, only that you had something to say and that you didn’t want to keep pretending that you didn’t. 

The feeling was short-lived for when you searched for Gerri and even finding the confidence in yourself to ask around for her, you eventually found yourself peeking in one of the bedrooms on the ground floor and seeing her sitting alone with David, his hand in her pretty brown hair with his lips kissing down her perfumed neck. 

Perhaps it would’ve been better to slip out quietly, but your legs had other intentions when they forced you to stumble back against the bedroom door and alert the two of them of your presence. 

Something alike to an apology came out of you, but it was more a medley of unintelligible half-spoken words than anything. 

David, now feeling a bit uncomfortable as the confrontation-avoidant person he was, stood up from the bed and apologised, but to who and for what reason you could not comprehend. 

Gerri watched as he left the room and you heard but did not process what he turned around and told her before he left, but it made her repress a laugh. 

Eventually Gerri stood too and when she approached you, you realised you were still standing at the bedroom door, stunned. She ran her hands down her jeans and asked, “Are you surprised?”

“… What?” you managed to say.

“Are you surprised?” she repeated. “I didn’t even know he was into me like that. I mean… No clue.”

You searched her eyes for something and though you weren’t entirely sure what you were looking for, you knew that you weren’t able to find it. She could hardly meet your eyes and you felt that perhaps she truly didn’t care about what you thought of her relationship with David, and you suddenly realised you really had grown distant from Gerri this time.

“Ger, do you wanna play?” David called from the living room where an empty space had been cleared for the beer pong table.

“Yeah, just a second!” she answered and without even turning to you, she moved to leave the bedroom.

Without thinking twice about it, you reached out and wrapped your hand around Gerri’s wrist, tugging her back into the open bedroom. “Don’t you care about what I think?” you suddenly asked her.

Gerri’s eyebrows pushed together as if confused by your outburst. “Okay,” she gave in and tore her arm wrist out of your hand. She massaged it with her fingers then let it fall to her side. “Fine. What do you think about it, Y/N? Go on. Tell me.”

You didn’t appreciate the sarcasm and resentment in her voice but you answered anyways, “You don’t even know David. Not really. Do you… even know his favourite song? His favourite band? Do you know what kinds of movies he hates? You’ve never even been to his house!”

You knew you were grasping at straws; your bubbling anger and upset had burst into a nonsensical dump of emotions and irritability.

“What the fuck are you even talking about?” Gerri asked, leaning forward and drilling her eyes into yours. “No one cares about that shit but you. Like, movies and songs?”

Her words pricked at your skin and you felt on edge. Your face felt hot and your anger only began to pique, but suddenly just looking at Gerri put some kind of silence to it all. And you felt like you were about to cry. 

Taking your tongue between your teeth to avoid letting your tears form, you gritted out quietly, “You used to care about that stuff too.” 

But your words didn’t reach her, like she hadn’t even heard them at all.

Gerri ran her fingers through her hair and scoffed. Her hands dropped to her sides. “Listen, Y/N… I thought you would’ve been happy about David and I, but-but…” Her hands waved around in front of her wildly as she tried to find her words. “But you’re acting like such a jealous bitch!”

It felt like the floor was about to collapse from underneath you.

“For once, you’re not the one getting the guys and that makes you crazy. Well, guess what? This is the real world, so grow up,” she bit.

You looked away, staring at some spot on the floor people kept stepping over, completely unaware and uncaring of the arguing you and Gerri were having. A part of you wished someone would at least give you a judgemental look so you’d feel for a moment that your entire world wasn’t what was happening right in front of you.

“What’s your problem?” she asked, breaking the silence.

“I came here to see you and spend time with you.”

She threw her arms up, hinting towards the party behind her. “Well, hello? Where do you think we are?”

“Gerri, this isn’t hanging out together; it’s hanging out with all these other people,” you said, then looked around at the crowd. They all seemed so far. Or rather, you just felt like a complete outsider. “I don’t even know who these people are. I came to be with you.”

“So, it’s my fault you’re antisocial as fuck and can’t make friends?”

Afraid that if you spoke any louder then your voice would break and shatter any sort of confidence you made it seem like you had, you met her eyes and whispered, “Fuck you.”

“Y/N, you try and paint yourself as some kind of victim here, but you’re being so fucking clingy and posessive! I’m not the spineless indecisive person I was before. I’m not just going to be your pet,” she retorted, her voice raising. 

You’d never seen Gerri so upset before.

Maybe she was right.

“It’s just not going to be the same anymore,” she added with finality, and you could swear that you couldn’t hear your heartbeat in your ears for nearly eight whole seconds.

Had your heart stopped?

People couldn’t function without their heartbeats, could they?

You raised your hand to your chest and massaged your fingertips into your shirt, feeling your heart’s beating beyond your ribcage.

Slowly, your hearing returned and you landed back on the ground, your legs trembling slightly and each and every overwhelming noise from the surrounding party bouncing around the inside of your skull, fracturing your very being from the inside out. 

“Are you in love with me or something?” Gerri inquired mockingly. “You’re being so fucking obsessive and weird.”

You were silent as her words sunk in, and soon all you could do was internalise her accusations, her bitter words that told you nothing but that you had been the odd one all along. You had come expecting something that you wouldn’t have ever gotten, all because you couldn’t understand the months you’d spent away from Gerri really did change things. 

Were you so dim-witted and excessive that it took being yelled at, pushing Gerri until she was at her wit’s end, to finally understand?

To finally understand that things… weren’t going to be the same anymore.

“What?” Gerri urged you for a response. 

There must’ve been some kind of expression on your face, a concerning one, for Gerri’s face untensed a little as she looked at you. She said your name. 

You watched the way her lips moved around each syllable but you couldn’t hear it. But you wished you could, because you weren’t sure of the next time you’d ever hear her say it again.

Whatever functioning part of your brain forced your body to work on autopilot you hurriedly gathered your thoughts together to internally thank, because before you knew it you were rounding Gerri and pushing through the mess of people that you just couldn’t seem to get away from. 

Gerri’s voice called out from behind you and you thought she was calling your name again, over and over, maybe even trailing behind you as she made an attempt to follow you out to wherever you were going.

But you weren’t sure where you were going. 

All that you knew was that you needed to leave. 

The calling of your name meshed with the sounds of blasting music and shrill laughter and incessant chatter allowed you to forget for just a moment what your name was. 

What did it sound like in Gerri’s mouth? What did she look like saying it? 

Pushing through the crowd, bodies brushing up against yours and nearly asphyxiating you should it not have been for the way you forcefully pushed them out of the way, you almost forgot you had your own — a body — and your mind moved to think about what it felt like to have Gerri touch yours, what it felt like to feel her shoulder brush against yours all those times you slept in the same bed as her like that first night at her place.

It became especially hard to breathe and you feared what would happen if you collapsed just inches from the door, but your hand reached the doorknob just in time and you stepped out onto the porch.

The cold air burned your lungs when you inhaled but it dried your cheeks, and you regained feeling in your body only for you to realise that everything hurt.

Your chest was tight and your throat was sore, your lungs felt like they were constricting and your limbs felt like they might detach from their sockets at any second. And that fucking thrumming against your ribcage made you want to rip your heart out of your chest.

As if clawing your way through to your beating heart, you scratched at your chest through your shirt and felt with the tips of your fingers the pendant of a necklace Gerri gave you three summers ago that you couldn’t remember why you wore out tonight.

Pulling your shirt down just enough to reach it, you wrapped your fingers around the thin silver chain and tugged it down firmly, forcing the clasp in the back to snap. You eyed the pendant for a second or two, looking at it laying in the centre of your palm.

She bought it for you because it looked scarily similar to the small seashell you brought her when you came back from your trip to Malta a few months prior. 

You couldn’t remember if you’d told her, but you brought it back for her because it reminded you so much of her eye colour.

A voice called Gerri’s name from inside and you’re reined back down to earth. You step off of the porch and toss the necklace along with the pendant into a nearby bush, feeling like you abhorred the childish memories you realised you had been clinging onto for years.

“Gerri!” the voice raised.

She turned her head, forced to abandon the endeavour to find out where you had run off to. “Wh… What?” she stuttered, looking over to the beer pong table in the middle of the living room where someone had pulled her towards.

One of her other friends raised his eyebrows at her expectantly. 

“Come on, it’s your turn,” David urged, lifting a small white plastic ball to her.

Zoey let you into the dorm albeit feeling irritated because she’d come home early from the party to have some time alone with her boyfriend. You promised her that you’d be quick. 

You felt a compelling urge to take one more look at Gerri’s guitar stashed in the back of her closet, so you did.

The stickers on its case, memories of listening to her play for hours, the dedication and love she used to put into learning it, a song she’d learned for you once on your birthday as a surprise played on that very guitar, all shrouded and hidden away. 

You closed the closet and left for the station.

For a moment you considered texting Gerri that you were leaving then recalled that she’d never given you the kindness to know where she was or when she was returning nor if or when she was leaving at all. 

The bus took you to the station and you tucked your phone in your pocket. It took a few minutes in line to buy a new ticket and then in half an hour you’d be well on your way back home.

There was nothing for you here, and you should’ve realised it long before tonight. 

“Y/N!” a voice suddenly called from behind and you turned instinctively to see Gerri running up to you, looking dishevelled and out of breath. 

“How did you know I’d be here?” you intoned after she stopped in front of you and caught her breath. 

Gerri hesitated a moment before saying hastily, “Uh, Winona. I asked Sam to call her. I-I thought you might be with her but she told me that you said something tonight about missing home.”

“You swim here?” you asked, looking at the state of her hair.

As if just then gaining self-awareness, she ran her fingers through her hair and brushed it back behind her ears. “No,” she breathed out with a little laugh. “It started raining and the streetcar would only take me until a few blocks down, and I didn’t want to wait for the next one because I thought it’d be too late.”

She was rambling. 

It used to be endearing, but now it sounded sorta stupid.

Everything seemed pretty stupid right now — even you.

Then she waited for you to say something in response, but you had nothing to say.

She raised her hand to show you the necklace you had thrown away earlier dangling from her fingers, the silver seashell pendant hanging from the end. 

“You dropped this,” she said, still panting slightly. The words sounded optimistic as she wasn’t entirely sure if you purposefully discarded it or accidentally lost it.

“Keep it,” you told her.

Gerri’s arm retracted and she laid the necklace in her other palm. Her actions were slow and it seemed that she was trying to make time for her to say something before she put the necklace away, but although her lips parted and her eyes flickered up a few times to look at you, she said nothing. Carefully, she slid the necklace into her jacket pocket. 

“I thought you had your departure ticket booked for tomorrow night,” she thought aloud, evidently stalling as she tried to come up with something useful to say. She looked up from her pocket to you and ran her hands down her coat nervously.

“Bought another one so I could leave early.”

Having it spoken out loud, putting it out there verbally that you were leaving early, planted a feeling of alarm in Gerri’s chest. She inhaled sharply and stepped towards you. She opened her mouth to say something, but the station’s speakers announced that your train was to leave within the next ten minutes.

Adjusting the strap of your backpack up your shoulder, you said, “I have to go.”

“O… Okay,” Gerri replied, stepping back so you could turn and wheel your luggage behind you. “Safe trip. Have one, I mean.”

The escalator down to Platform Five was just ahead, becoming closer with each of your steps, and you traced your path from the last time you were at the station. Recalling it pained you slightly as you thought back to how hopeful and eager you had been when you stepped off the train last week.

You expected so much — too much.

So much had changed since then, and it was only a week ago.

How hadn’t you realised how grave a few months’ difference could make until just an hour ago?

You felt so stupid. Everything felt so… stupid. 

Your face was hot and you were boiling in your jacket. Your bag was too heavy and your luggage was hurting your wrist. Then tears were forming in your eyes and you raised your other hand to wipe at your eyes. 

The rapid clicking of padding shoes echoed behind you and before you could look back, your wrist was taken and pulled back, forcing you to turn and drop your luggage. A hand came to the back of your head and in spite of how quick it all was, her hands were soft and her caresses were careful.

An arm rounded your waist and your body was pulled against Gerri’s.

Her lips were suddenly pressed against yours and you smelled a whiff of her perfume, now having faded away throughout the night. But you could smell it clearly now that you were pressed up against her, and she wouldn’t let any space come between the two of you. 

Like last summer and all the summers before, all the years spent knowing Gerri as your closest friend and your greatest love, you were swathed in her as if her scent and the feeling of her body, the feeling of her lips, were a warm blanket.

When your lips parted from hers, green eyes flickered down your face and Gerri whispered, “Why are you crying?”

You looked away from her and quickly swiped at your eyes.

Keeping her other arm around your waist, she raised her hand to your face and swatted your hands away so she could wipe your tears for you. She kissed your damp cheeks and seemed to not be able to get enough of feeling your skin against her lips, so she kept kissing you.

You turned your head and Gerri stopped kissing you to tilt her head and keep her eyes on yours. It didn’t seem like you wanted to talk. It didn’t seem like you knew what you wanted to say much less how you felt.

So she started talking instead.

She started with: “I’m sorry.”

It didn’t look like you believed her, so she cupped your cheek and made you look at her.  

“Y/N, I’m sorry,” she repeated.

You were looking into her eyes now and she had your attention, but you were silent. You were waiting for her to say something more, and she had a lot to say. She didn’t know how to start it all, so she just dove into it.

“I, um… I used to see you every day, and it became hard to be here without you. I had to make — force — a different version of myself to blend in with these assholes. It was easier than missing you. It was easier than…” She trailed off and you wondered if she’d give up and just let you leave. 

In spite of how confidently she spoke, her fingers tightened around your waist and you felt how nervous she was. Her hand moved down your wrist and her fingers danced anxiously against your palm.

But she continued. 

“It was easier than admitting to myself that I was in love with my best friend. That I am in love with my best friend,” she finally said, exhaling deeply, her breath trembling. She looked away from you and over at the floor behind you.

You followed her eyes to survey the sincerity of what she was saying. It seemed true. It all seemed true. It felt true.

Then she took a breath and met your eyes again.

“I thought that maybe I just needed to grow up — to realise that I couldn’t be that same old small-town girl who’s never gotten shit-faced drunk or who’s never had sex with a guy,” she tried to explain. 

She was stuttering a little. 

“I mean, god, Y/N, the people here are fucking crazy. But I don’t enjoy it. Not even a little. I hate being around people I don’t know — people I don’t like. I don’t want to have sex with guys.” Then she scoffed and in a quick drop of her hand that seemed the slightest bit subconscious, she took your hand. “I don’t even like guys. I mean, I don’t think I do. Or at least the ones here. I don’t know.”

Gerri’s breathing became quick and you could see that she was trying not to look away from you. “Why aren’t you saying anything? Please say something,” she pleaded.

Your lips parted and you were going to say something, you were, but Gerri suddenly blurted out, “I want to be your girlfriend. And I wanna kiss you again.” She leaned down and kissed your chin.

“I want to be able to kiss you there,” she whispered.

She kissed your cheeks and your temples.

“I want to kiss you here.”

Your knuckles were lifted up to her lips and she kissed each of your five fingers, looking into your eyes. Then she lowered your hand and leaned forward to kiss your lips again. “And here,” she breathed against you. “I want to kiss you here. Again. Whenever I want to. Whenever you want to.”

An announcement came onto the speakers.

Five minutes left until the train was to leave.

The announcement reined you back down to earth and you looked around at the people passing, rushing to their trains, children in-hand, perhaps meeting their families elsewhere, going to meetings.

Everyone else — where were they off to?

“Am I too late…?” Gerri whispered.

You looked back over to her. 

Everyone else… 

Did it matter? Nothing else mattered when you were with Gerri. Nothing else ever mattered when you were with her.

You shook your head and uttered a soft, “I love you too, Gerri.”

“Y/N…” she said quietly. “Things won’t be the same. If we break up, if we fight. Even if we’re together until we’re old, things will change. And between us, it’ll be different.”

“No, it’ll be just the same,” you finally replied. “It’ll always just be you and me. That isn’t any different from how it’s always been, right?”

Gerri let out a noise that sounded like a laugh or some kind of relieved exhale and she let go of your hand and wrapped her arms around your shoulders. She started apologising again and again for how she’d been treating you, for how stupid she was acting.

In half-intelligible teary words, she said she wished it could just be you and her again like it was last summer and all the other summers before. She hated how much she’d changed while you were gone.

Your bag slipped from your arm and you hugged her back, letting her cry into your shoulder in the middle of the train station. “I miss it all so much too, Gerri,” you confessed. “I’ve missed you so much.”

Then you started crying, and Jesus, did that make you feel like an idiot.

“I really hate Winona,” Gerri confessed and hugged you tighter, which made you laugh like an idiot too. 

Some things just don’t change.

As Christmas break was fast approaching, Gerri’s parents had been pressuring her to tell them about her love life, asking if she had any suitors and if whoever it was would come with her for Christmas. So that was how Gerri ended up pleading with Y/N in their dorm room.

“Please, they will not give up until I bring someone home with me.” Gerri begged as Y/N sighed.

“You could always just not go home.” They suggested as she shook her head. “What’s one christmas? Tell them you have a shit ton of work to get through before the next semester starts.”

“No!” She threw herself on their bed, looking up at them with her puppy dog eyes. “Please just come with me, you’re not doing anything for christmas so it could be fun for you.”

“Well, they might tell me some embarrassing stories of a younger Gerri Fields.” They teased as she swatted their chest, making them laugh at her cute pout. “Fine, I’ll come with you.”

“Thank you.” She jumped on them, wrapping her arms around their neck as she smothered their face in playful kisses, although they knew she would never see them as they saw her, it never stopped the butterflies erupting in their stomach.

Y/N was extremely nervous as they drove to Gerri’s childhood home, listening as she sang along to the radio.

“Don’t you forget about me.” She sang along to her favourite Simple Minds hit as they smiled. “I’ll be alone, dancing, you know it baby.”

“How far are we?” They asked her as they interrupted her performance.

“Only around 10 minutes now.” She told them as she smiled at the streets she grew up on, a sense of peace filling her until they pulled up outside of her parents house. “So, we know the story about us?” She questioned as they nodded.

“We’ll pull through this, ok?” They reassured her as they took her hand in theirs, a gentle smile on their face as she took a deep calming breath.

“Let’s do this.” She told them as they got out of the car, rushing to her side and opening the door. “You didn’t have to.” She told them as they smiled, leaning in to whisper in her ear.

“You want me to pretend right, this is me when I am in a relationship.” They told her as she blushed lightly, feeling their lips press against her skin. She watched as they soon got their bags from the trunk before leading them to the door. Sighing before she unlocked the door and being pressed by her parents.

“Mom, Dad, this is Y/N.” She introduced them as they shook both of her parents' hands.

“It’s nice to meet you both, Gerri has told me so much about you.” They told them with their charming smile.

“Go and put your bags in your room, and come and have some tea.” Kate told them both as the two nodded, they watched as Y/N carried all of the bags as they followed Gerri up the stairs. Once they were inside, she closed the door and sighed loudly, causing Y/N to look at her.

“What’s wrong?” They asked her softly as she shook her head.

“This was a stupid idea.” She whispered as they gave her a gentle smile. “A fucking bad idea.”

“Hey, we will get through this.” They told her softly as she just nodded. “Ok, I won’t leave you.” They reassured her before pulling her in for a hug.

Once the two had joined Kate and Danny in the living room, Y/N held Gerri’s hand on their own.

“So, how did you two meet?” Danny asked as he gestured between the two of them.

“College.” The two answered in unison.

“We were paired for a project on our music course and we did a number.” Gerri started.

“So you play guitar?” He cut in as he pointed at Y/N.

“I do sir, and the piano.” They answered him.

“Double threat.” Kate mumbled to Danny who hid his smile. “So tell us about your family.” Kate asked them as Gerri glared at her mom.

“You don’t have to.” Gerri told them as they gave her a small smile.

“It’s ok.” They reassured her. “My parents died while I was just starting high school, my brother and I were put into the system and well, I don’t know where he is right now since they split us up.”

“I’m so sorry.” Danny spoke sincerely. “We didn’t mean to pry.”

“It’s ok.” They shook their head. “You want to know the person who is possibly going to be Gerri’s life partner, it’s completely understandable.”

“Why don’t you two go and relax while Danny and I start on dinner.” Kate told them as Gerri decided to drag Y/N out of the house for a walk around the neighborhood.

“I’m so sorry about that.” Gerri started as she walked beside Y/N. Soon stopping when they held her hand.

“It’s ok.” They told her. “They just wanted to know the person who they let into their home.”

“But.” She tried as they shook their head.

“It’s fine.” They told her before they continued their walk. Gerri telling them as much as she could about her childhood and growing up.

Christmas Eve, Y/N was helping Danny cook hot dogs and burgers on the grill, the two just conversing before he decided to ask them a serious question.

“Do you see a future with my daughter?” He asked them as they nodded.

“I do, sir.” They answered him honestly. “From the moment I first saw her, I knew that I needed to know her, be her friend and maybe be her everything if she would let me.”

“You love her.” He observed as they nodded, feeling relief as they spoke their true feelings.

“I do, I guess it’s from the moment I looked into her eyes and heard her laugh for the first time.” They told him.

“Have you told her?” He asked them as they shook their head no. “You should tell her. You only live once.”

“Y/N, can you help me?” Gerri popped her head outside which they just nodded, following her out onto the front porch.

“What’s up?” They asked her as she closed the door.

“I heard.” She spoke shakily. “Everything you just said, did you mean it?” She asked them as they remained silent. “I need to know if you meant it or if it was all pretend.”

“I meant it.” They told her. “I meant every word Gerri. You’re my best friend and I have been in love with you for as long as I can remember.” They sighed as they took a nervous step closer. “I guess everyday that I have spent with you has made me fall more and more.”

Gerri stepped before them, cupping their face as she looked up into their eyes. Slowly leaning in before she spoke.

You rush over to Gerri and climb on her bed and pull her into your chest “Hey, what’s wrong Ger? You can tell me” you whisper against her hair as her body shakes with her silent sobs against your chest. You rub your hand over Gerri’s back hoping to soothe her and soon enough her wracking sobs subside so, you gently pull her away from your chest and wipe her tears from her cheeks with the pads of your thumbs softly. 

“Hey, it’s okay. You wanna tell me what happened” you asked softly not wanting to push her too much. 

Gerri sits up and turns so she can face you again and sighs “It’s stupid just my friend back home Lily, you know the one I told you about?” Oh boy did you know about Lily and the whole debacle that had happened just before Gerri came to college. Gerri had told you all about Lily and her boyfriend David and you still couldn’t understand how a best friend could do that to someone, let alone to Gerri. 

You just nodded “well she called and everything was great at first but then she started mentioning how great her and David were since they reconnected. Then she proceeded to tease me about not losing my virginity yet and that I should get a move on and it wasn’t really that big a deal. She also teased me because I hadn’t even had so much as a kiss here at college” she continued. 

Your eyes went wide at Gerri mentioning she was still a virgin but you managed to hide it as Gerri was so upset recounting her phone call with Lily. How could someone as attractive as Gerri Fields not have lost her virginity yet but this only made your heart pound faster and your feelings for her grow fonder. Of course she was still a virgin, she was so sweet and caring that it made sense for her to want to wait for someone perfect. 

Very quickly this affection turned into anger, not towards Gerri of course not but, towards Lily. How dare she make fun of Gerri for not losing her virginity when she took that opportunity away from her the summer before college when she started having sex with the guy Gerri fancied. 

“Anyway, I got so frustrated with her teasing that I may have blurted out that I actually had lost my virginity and I was dating someone” Gerri finishes sighing. 

“First of all there is nothing wrong with still being a virgin many people are during their first year of college. And so what? It’s a teeny white lie, how’s she going to find out anyway?” you asked confused whilst grabbing Gerri’s hand and brushing over her knuckles with your thumb to soothe her once more. 

Gerri pulls her hands back and starts fidgeting with them and looks away shyly and mumbles something. 

“What did you say Ger, you were mumbling” you questioned her. Gerri looks into your eyes “I said that I told Lily that I had sex with you and that I was currently dating you and I would bring you home this weekend with me to meet my family and Lily” she blurted out. 

You looked at her with wide eyes and mouth agape “Ger! Why’d you do that, I can’t pretend to be your girlfriend this weekend” you exclaimed jumping off her bed pacing around the room nervously. You couldn’t do this not when you had strong feelings for Gerri, not when you were in love with her. 

You kept pacing around throwing out nos to every one of her pleas as you ran your hands through your hair nervously.

“Please y/n? It’s just for the weekend, please I can’t have this looming over me. Lily already thinks I am a joke for still being a virgin, she cannot know I lied about this because I was annoyed and embarrassed. Please y/n, it’s just three days I promise” Gerri had strode across the room and was now holding on to your arm pleading with you. 

You looked into Gerri’s moss-green eyes and sighed as she was looking at you with so much need silently pleading with you. You have never been able to say no to Gerri and this moment wasn’t any different as you melted as soon as you stared into those gorgeous eyes.

“Fine, I'll pretend to be your girlfriend. Just for the weekend though Ger, I mean it” you state warningly. 

Gerri smiles widely and it makes you weak at the knees as she wraps her arms around you and buries her head in the crook of your neck “Thank you, thank you y/n” she mumbles gratefully, her breath brushing against your neck causing goosebumps and your heart to start pounding rapidly in your chest as you bring your arms around her holding her tightly. 

What the hell, you think. What could possibly go wrong? 

Oh boy were you wrong.

///

The two of you were fully packed by Thursday night and by Friday you were both on the road travelling back to Gerri’s hometown. You had offered to drive as you were the only one with a licence and the drive was only four hours long. 

During these four hours Gerri spent the whole time filling you in about her mom and younger brother along with Lily and David. You noticed she had begun spiralling and reached over to put your hand on her thigh to calm her down. 

“Ger, don’t worry. I have met your mom and brother loads of times this isn’t any different and as for David and Lily well, you have me now. I won’t let them put you down or make you feel embarrassed. Why are you even still friends with her after what she did and the way she makes you feel anyway?” you pondered. 

Gerri sighs “she hasn’t always been like this. She’s been my best friend since we were three and I don’t know if people always say you change when you first get a partner maybe that’s just what this is” she speculates. 

You nod in understanding, still stroking Gerri’s thigh before pulling it away to put two hands on the steering wheel.

“Okay well, if we are going to convince Lily and David we have to come up with a set list of facts. That will ensure that if either of us are cornered alone then we have the same stories and are consistent so as to avoid suspicion. 

First of all, we need the story of how and when we decided we felt more towards each other than just friendship. Then we need a first date story, a first kiss story and the first time we slept together. We don’t have to go into detail. We can just say we were nervous and clumsy at first but I made sure you were comfortable and it turned out to be amazing. We just state that we want to keep the details intimately between us. Is all of that okay?” you suggested. 

“Yeah, that sounds great. Thank you y/n, I mean it. There is no one I would rather date or fake date than you” Gerri expresses her gratitude. You smile at her but feel as if you have been punched in the gut, you are going to have to remind yourself that anything the two of you do this weekend is fake dating. 

It’s not real and you feel yourself deflating as you remind yourself of this and the situation you are in. 

////

Eventually, with directions from Gerri you pull up to the driveway at her house and see her mom and brother standing waving at you both along with two blonde-haired individuals who you presume are Lily and David. 

You switch your engine off and turn to Gerri “Ready babe?” you tease as Gerri quirks her brow confused. You unbuckle your seatbelt and lean over to whisper in her ear “We’re supposed to be girlfriends. So I’m going to be talking and acting like I am actually dating you to make this believable. Now, is there anything you are not comfortable with before we leave this car?” you whisper in her ear. 

Gerri shakes her head “no bubs” she giggles. To everyone outside it looks like the two of you are flirting so you lean back and press your lips to Gerri’s cheek as she blushes. You smile “well then let the weekend commence Ger” and you get out of the car and unload the bags. 

Gerri comes over and slings her bad over her shoulder and grabs your hand, interlacing your fingers with hers as she pulls you over to everyone. 

“Y/n, I am so glad that the two of you came to your senses and confessed your feelings to each other” Gerri’s mom cheers as she hugs you and Gerri. You glance over at Gerri and you see her blushing profusely so you smile at her and lean over and kiss her temple whilst squeezing her hand reassuringly. 

“Me too, Mrs Fields” you reply. 

“Oh come on now y/n, how many times do I have to tell you to call me Kate” she playfully chastises you. “Well, thank you Kate. I promise to take great care of your daughter” you promise her and she nods thankfully. 

Kate and Gerri’s brother head inside to prepare lunch whilst Gerri introduces you to Lily and David. 

“Lily, David. This is y/n, my girlfriend that I was telling you about on the phone. We were roommates and became very close friends and then from there we started dating. Y/n, bubs, this is my best friend Lily and her boyfriend David” Gerri introduces us all. 

“It’s nice to meet you both, Ger talks about you both highly. It’s nice to finally put faces to the names” I say politely as I hug Lily and shake David’s hand before wrapping my hand around Gerri’s waist and pulling her back into me rubbing soothing circles along her hip bone.

“You know I was surprised that Gerri had actually lost her virginity, let alone started dating someone. I had no idea she was into girls, I thought she would remain frigid for at least a couple more years at college” Lily jeered. 

I felt Gerri tense up by my side “well, Ger is an amazing human and I would have been blind and stupid not to fall in love with her. I think her waiting until she was in a proper relationship instead of some person she had just met means a lot more. You and David started out as a one night stand no?” I bite back to Lily’s surprise. 

“I suppose we did,” she responds stiffly before putting her fake smile back on and suggesting we head inside and get something to eat. 

Once inside Kate shows us up to Gerri’s bedroom and leaves us to get settled and to join everyone else out in the back once we were unpacked. As soon as the door was closed Gerri came up and buried her head against my chest “thank you, for standing up for me when she called me frigid” she thanked me.

I wrap my arms around her tightly before leaning back as I cup her cheek to look at me “of course, she was out of order. I won’t let her insult you in front of me like that. She acts like she is better than you because she isn’t a virgin anymore. It’s important that you know just because sex means a lot to you and you haven’t found the right person does not mean you are frigid Ger. 

Also, what she said about not knowing you were into girls. Was that true? Are you interested in girls romantically or sexually?” You inquire softly. 

“Yeah I am into girl sexually and romantically. I’m bisexual is that okay?” she hesitates looking right into my eyes. 

“Of course, that is okay Ger. I just wanted to make sure I didn’t make you feel too uncomfortable during this weekend” you reassure her. She hugs you once again and the two of you head back downstairs hand in hand after unpacking. 

The afternoon passes by quickly and you find yourself bombarded by questions from Lily. You find the more time you spend with this girl the less and less you like her. She flaunts David in front of Gerri throughout the afternoon, makes condescending remarks and constantly makes jokes that David chose her. At one point David gets uncomfortable and tells Lily to knock it off and you place a kiss on Gerri's temple to hide your smirk. 

You can tell although you and Gerri are affectionate Lily isn’t buying the whole relationship and is becoming sceptical. Lily keeps asking questions to catch you both out which leads to her questioning the first time you two kissed. 

“Well, y/n had asked me out and she took me to this little hidden lake on campus that we had found whilst exploring campus the first week of college. She told me she had liked me for a while and that she couldn’t imagine doing this anywhere else. I asked her what she meant and she cupped my chin and tilted it upwards and asked if she could kiss me. I nodded and she kissed me” Gerri gushes as her eyes light up almost like she wishes it had happened.  

“Very romantic y/n. Asking for consent and taking Gerri somewhere romantic almost seems as if it was straight out a fairytale” Lily implies whilst narrowing her eyes at me. 

Lily’s response irks me to no end “Well, I knew that I was Gerri’s first kiss with another woman and I wanted to embrace that and make it as memorable for her as it was for me. Also, I take consent very seriously Lily. I wouldn’t want Ger to feel pressured at any point in our relationship, I love her too much” I recount. 

Eventually, Lily and David go home and Gerri and I head upstairs to relax before dinner with Gerri’s family. 

I shut the door behind us and jump on Gerri’s bed letting my frustrations at Lily go. I feel Gerri come lie on the bed next to me and rub my back soothingly “I’m sorry” she announces. I quickly sit up and hold her hand “why on earth are you apologising Ger” I ask. 

“The way Lily treated us, I don’t think she believed us enough. God, this was so stupid” she groaned. 

“Hey, no. After meeting her in person I get why you did it and I’m more determined than ever to show her we are dating. But we need to move things up a notch to make this believable. I, uhm, I was wondering, if I could possibly kiss you? I mean I think to make this believable we need to kiss in front of everyone or in the corner when we think people aren’t paying attention. But only if you are comfortable with it, we can not kiss and just keep doing what we are doing. I’m sorry I probably just made things weird we don’t have to. It was-” Gerri yells my name to cut off my rambling. 

“Yes, you can kiss me. Like you said if we want this to be believable then we need to kiss. It doesn’t mean anything, it's just for this weekend to help this act move along” she chuckles. 

I feel a pain in my chest as she notes it doesn’t mean anything but also nervous as I have wanted to kiss Gerri for a long time now. I nod and shuffle closer to her. I push a strand of her hair that had fallen back behind her ear and cup her cheek as she looks at me. Slowly, I begin to tilt my head towards her as she does the same and soon I feel her breath brushing against my lips. I close the gap and capture her bottom lip in mine and I feel my heart soar as she begins moving her lips against mine. 

I take in how soft her lips are against my own and the taste of her peach Chapstick that she put on earlier. I find myself wanting to be more immersed with her so I run my tongue along her bottom lip and she grants me permission as she gasps against my mouth allowing my tongue to meet her own. Our tongues move together perfectly as I explore her mouth with my own. 

In this moment I forget we are not together and that this is all fake and after this weekend it will be as if this kiss and all the others to follow will never have existed. I try to tell myself that her moaning is because of me and that she might feel the same as I do at this moment as she wraps her hands around my neck pulling me against her lips further. 

Eventually, we have to break away for air and I open my eyes to see hers still closed before her eyes flutter open slowly as her moss-green eyes meet my own y/e/c ones. 

“You’re an amazing kisser y/n” she giggles. “Thank you Ger, you were pretty amazing yourself. Keep kissing me like that and you might fool me into thinking we are together” I joke not noticing the way Gerri looks away shyly. 

I excuse myself from the bed and head to go take a shower before dinner. 

“If only you knew how in love with you I am y/n y/l/n, that that kiss wasn’t fake for me” Gerri sighs. 

Gerri couldn’t believe her ears when you said you were willing to kiss her often to make this believable. She wasn’t lying when she said you were a great kisser. It was everything she hoped your first kiss with her would be, she felt as if she was floating on cloud nine right now. 

Gerri brings her fingers up to her lips tracing where your lips had moved against her own, the way your mouth fitted perfectly against her own as if they were two puzzle pieces coming together. The way your tongue gilded with her, she felt embarrassed when she had moaned but you had only held on tighter and kissed her more passionately. Gerri’s heart was still pounding fast in her chest as she tried to come down from the euphoria you had brought her from one simple kiss.

Turns out Gerri had been in love with you since the first week of college but was too frightened to say anything in case it ruined your friendship. You were the woman who made Gerri realise that she was bisexual and she confided in her mother that she was in love with you. 

It was why Gerri was always so affectionate with you, why she cuddled in your bed at night, how she would always sleep in your bed, why her mother was so happy for you two. It was why you were the first name she blurted out when she started this whole lie and Gerri guesses that she hopes by the end of it you will fall in love with her too. 

Little did she know you already had and that this was about to become a very messy weekend. 

In theory, this sounds like it should be a nice night out with the people who brought you into this world and it probably would be if your parents weren’t such self-absorbed assholes who treat you like the black sheep of the family.

The obvious way out of this situation would be to avoid the dinner altogether, but being that they’re the reason you’re not homeless living in the heart of New York, you have no choice but to show up or fall into crippling debt.

Instead of spending Valentine’s Day whining about not having a significant other while eating your weight in chocolate covered strawberries, you get a night where your egotistical parents and headass of an older brother hound you about your life while bragging about how perfect theirs are, making you want to gauge your eyes out with a butter knife.

You’re highly aware that tonight will be no different in comparison to the previous years, but you’ll be damned if you have to go through it alone this time.

This brought you to the person you know you can count on for absolutely anything.

Carefully digging through a potted plant that’s littered with thorns no matter how hard you try to avoid them, you only prick the back of your hand three times before finding the spare key that unlocks the front door to the Fields Residence.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite intruder!” Mr. Fields greets you warmly from the kitchen, already making your day better. After tossing the key back in its place, you walk inside, removing your snow-covered boots and winter coat.

“Still haven’t thought of a less harmful place to store your spare, Danny?”

Formalities with Gerri’s parents were aggressively thrown out the window the very first night you met them. After meeting her over a year ago in your college’s music theory class, the two of you became close friends and the first thing you did during Thanksgiving break was meet her family.

Immediately, you loved their warm and welcoming energy seeing as it was something you weren’t used to with your own parents. The Fields family made it clear from the beginning of your friendship with their daughter that you were always welcome in their home.

This in turn made you feel more homesick for her home rather than yours whenever you were back at school.

“You never know with all the crazies out there, Y/n. I’m just surprised Gerri hasn’t given you your own key at this point.” The man teases, half-joking since you show up here so often, sometimes when Gerri isn’t even home.

“It would definitely help with the pain, no offense to Barry,” that’s what the cactus is named, “Though, the scars do make me look kinda badass, especially when I nick my knuckles.” You ponder, flexing your hand outwards to show Danny the healed up cuts and he puffs out his lip, nodding his head in agreement.

“Very badass.” The two of you laugh as he gives you a brief but tight side hug, “Gerri’s up in her room, by the way, kiddo.”

You thank him, casually thieving a chocolate covered strawberry on the counter and nearly inhaling it before also wishing him a quick Happy Valentine’s Day.

Trotting upstairs, you follow the sound of Gerri’s speakers loudly playing Love Story by Taylor Swift. Her door is already halfway open, but you slow to a stop before taking a peek around the corner.

With the music blasting at max volume, Gerri is unable to hear your footsteps creaking down the hallway, lost in her own world as she dances around her room and sings the lyrics at the top of her lungs.

You watch Gerri jump around, her wavy brown hair slowly falling out of her already loose lazy bun, dancing with such fluidity while holding a stuffed bear you won at Coney Island yet she insisted on keeping.

A smile can’t help but form on your face at the adorable sight and you’re too entertained by the show to announce your presence. Even when looking like a total doofus, you still thought of Gerri as the most beautiful being you’d ever set your eyes on.

That’s not something you could bring yourself to tell her out loud, though.

Before the bridge of the song, the brunette twirls and finally sets her eyes on you, but she doesn’t shy away from the fact that you caught her in a private moment.

That’s not your Gerri.

“I got tired of waiting,” she smiles mischievously, tosses the bear back on the bed, and beckons you over with her index finger, “wondering if you were ever coming around, my faith in you was fading, when I met you on the outskirts of town,” she continues to sing and move her shoulders to the beat of the song.

You shake your head amused, remaining in your spot against her door frame.

“I said, Romeo save me, I’ve been feeling so alone, I keep waiting for you but you never come.” Not taking no for an answer, Gerri skips forward until she’s pulling you into the room by your shoulders.

Now she’s singing in your face with enormous passion, shaking your body back and forth as she grows impatient with your silence, but it’s very difficult for you to sing through your smile.

“Is this in my head? I don’t know what to think,” As Gerri slides her hands up to the sides of your face to shake your brain around instead, you hold onto her wrists to keep her from giving you whiplash or accidentally bonking your heads together. “He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said…”

Unable to deny her any longer, you finally give in, belting out the words while bobbing your head up and down. Gerri’s smile widens and she intertwines your fingers together as she pulls you closer to the middle of her room.

“I love you and that’s all I really know!”

Next thing you know, you’re getting yourself lost in Gerri’s world, too, shuffling your feet and spinning around like you’re the only two people to exist. The comfort of her carefree energy never fails to envelop you into a safe place that makes you feel more at home.

When the music ends, the two of you gracefully fall side-by-side into Gerri’s bed, both out of exhaustion from jumping so much and to slow the intense dizziness. One of her hands has yet to let go of yours, making your head spin even more.

“That was fun.” The brunette pants, letting out a breathless laugh as she looks over at your smiling face.

“Yeah, it was.”

When you return her gaze, you notice that her hair had fallen completely out of its bun, the brown strands beautifully lying around her head upon the mattress.

Every word known to man could never accurately describe her beauty and what it does to your heartstrings.

With her fingers still laced with yours, Gerri lifts it up to observe the damage you’ve taken today, “You prick yourself again?” She asks, softly grazing her thumb over the new marks on your skin.

You hum a yes, incapable of tearing your eyes away from the concern that shows on her face. The way she worries for you over some harmless scratches that were no bigger than the size of a tic-tac made the butterflies in your chest flutter.

“Sorry, we really need to get you your own key.”

Huffing out a laugh, you softly pull your hand away so you can sit up, “Your dad was telling me the same thing.”

Routinely, Gerri stands from her bed to grab the mini first aid kit from her dresser. When she returns, she sits in a criss-cross position, pulling out some mini alcohol wipes and band-aids from the plastic box. “I feel bad having to patch you up every time you come over.”

You turn your body so that you’re facing each other, “Well, first off you don’t have to patch me up. It’s a tiny scratch from a thorn, not a bite from a rabid subway rat,” you inform the girl, making her eyes roll slightly as you instinctively place your injured hand on her lap, patiently waiting for her to clean the fresh cuts, “Second, it isn’t that big a deal. I mean, if you guys placed your spare right next to a wasp nest instead, then we’d have some bigger problems.”

Gerri giggles softly, rubbing the alcohol pad on the open wounds and stinging them for just a moment before little band-aids are placed. When she finishes, Gerri carefully lifts your hand to her lips, placing three gentle kisses on the patched up skin.

Closing both of her hands around yours, she keeps it in her lap, leaning forward slightly as she smiles cheekily at you.

“There. All better?”

The playful yet gentle stare in those gorgeous green eyes makes your stomach turn in the most exciting way possible, but you push the feeling down as you always do. You chuckle, squeezing her hand as you look at her adoringly, “All better. Thank you, Dr. Fields.”

The softness in your voice makes Gerri’s eyes light up, making her subconsciously bite her lower lip. You watch the action with a racing heart, looking back up to find her pupils had dilated as her gaze flickers between your mouth and eyes.

Surely this is part of your imagination, right?

Before either of you could pluck up the nerve to lean in first, you’re both startled when a hamper full of clean clothes is thrown into the room. Breaking eye contact, you and Gerri see her little brother standing in the doorway.

“Were you two about to kiss right now? Because you jumped away from each other like you were about to kiss.” He wonders with an amused smile, narrowing his eyes between the two of you and making you both blush madly.

“Karl, get out! Now!” The brunette exclaims, dropping your hand to shove the boy out. He laughs loudly as Gerri shuts the door, leaning her back against it to ensure he doesn’t come in again.

She covers her face in embarrassment, unable to look you directly in the eye for the moment.

Quietly laughing to yourself, you let Gerri regain her composure and stand from the bed to empty out the hamper, helping sort out her clothes.

“Damn, Gerr. I didn’t think the idea of kissing me was that repulsive.”

“That’s not– I wasn’t–”

“Just jokes.” You look at her over your shoulder with an assuring smile.

Gerri lets her shoulders fall after exhaling out a relieved sigh.

Slowly, she makes her way back over to her phone, playing another song for the two of you to listen to before she begins picking at the clothes you had already folded and starts putting them away.

This routine became a regular thing after your first couple of visits to Gerri’s house. Once she was comfortable having you in her room so often, she started getting too lazy to put her laundry away and you did not want to be lying on a mountain of clothes that were scattered across her bed.

When this habit of you cleaning her own messes began, Gerri felt bad watching you do it alone, so she decided to lend a hand. To her pleasant surprise, it was actually really relaxing having you around to help. Plus, the chore would be done in half the amount of time compared to if she were to do it by herself.

“So, what are the rest of your Valentine’s Day plans?” You casually question, silently praying that her schedule is open.

“Probably just going to throw on some shitty romcoms and get sick from eating too many chocolate covered strawberries. Why?”

You swallow your nerves, reminding yourself that this is just you, a friend, asking for a favor from Gerri, another friend.

It doesn’t have to be a nerve-racking conversation, but you wonder why your palms are getting so sweaty and what it was that was making you hear the sound of your own heart pounding in through your ears.

“Don’t you have that family dinner for your parent’s anniversary tonight?” She asks, taking the handful of bundled socks you give her.

Oh good, she remembered. “I do. I’m not exactly looking forward to it though, because it’s the worst night of my year, surrounded by literally the worst people on this planet.”

Gerri is aware that you’re not very close with your family and that you don’t like to talk about them much, but you’ve never gone into detail as to why that was.

She noticed the way your entire mood deflated whenever she asked about them in the beginning of your friendship, how the mere thought of them brought up some uncomfortable feelings in you, so she quickly stopped asking.

“Why don’t you just tell them you can’t go?” If this night was so dreadful for you to go through, Gerri wondered what was stopping you from ditching the event completely.

You chirp up, playfully pretending to be shocked, “Oh, wow! You know, I’ve never thought to do that. That’s actually a really good idea, Gerr. Why hadn’t I-”

Gerri lightly smacks your bottom with a shirt she’s putting away, making you both laugh, “Okay! You don’t gotta be a smartass about it. Geez.”

“Trust me, if I could avoid tonight, I would. To my terrible misfortune, I can’t afford to pay my college and housing bills on my own yet, so my parents financially keep my head above water. Not without a price of their own, though. They’re not that generous.”

Gerri watches you carefully from the foot of her bed as you start getting lost in your own rambling, but you continue folding her clothes to distract yourself.

“The deal is that they keep me stable so long as I attend their stupid yearly dinner at their stupid favorite restaurant where I have to sit and listen to their stupid lecture about how unsuccessful I’m destined to be in life. Meanwhile, my dickhead of an older brother gets all the loving praise for being the most mediocre man in the world.”

You stop folding the clothes, pausing your ramble to take a deep breath in an attempt to relieve the stress that’s already brewing in your chest.

“You know, I can’t even remember one time in my life they were happy for me about anything. My valedictorian speech at my high school graduation? With such a small school it shouldn’t have been that hard to get in the first place. We also have a conference that weekend. My NYU acceptance letter? Well that’s useless since you’re wasting college on a silly music degree, Y/n. Why can’t you study business like your brother?”

It was unfair how poorly your own family thought of you, like you weren’t even a part of them, especially when you did nothing in the past to make them treat you this way.

“Literally everything I do is wrong in their eyes. It’s the fucking worst, but then again they’re the fucking worst so what else should I expect?”

You slump back down on the bed and massage your temples, attempting to erase the stress that’s already festering in your brain just thinking about going through tonight.

“I know I didn’t exactly paint the prettiest picture of them to you just now, but I really don’t want to sit through this hellish night alone again and I’d hate it a lot less if I had you there with me,” you tell Gerri, nervously fidgeting with your new band-aids, “It’s a lot to ask and I’m not expecting you to say yes, but I just… I need you there, Gerr.”

With your shaking leg, hand fidgets, and cheek biting, all of your anxious tics were on full display for Gerri to see and the dinner hadn’t even started yet. This night weighs you down so heavily that your friend would be a fool to let you carry it on your own.

Pulling you away from your fixed stare at the floor, Gerri places her soft hands upon your face and tilts your head until you look up at her calming gaze. You immediately loosen your jaw, fluttering your eyes shut when she runs her fingers through your hair, letting the rest of your muscles relax beneath her touch.

“Hey,” she calls to you gently and you open your eyes, leaning into her hands as she links them behind your neck, “I’ll be there.”

You smile up at her softly, pushing your body forward until you bury your head into Gerri’s stomach. She laughs, lightly scratching your scalp and tracing her fingers along the nape of your neck.

Everything is so easy with Gerri, you sometimes find it hard to believe that she’s real.

“Thank you.” You mumble into her shirt before looking back up to meet her eyes. “I can’t promise that it’s going to be the most fun time of your life, but-” The brunette squishes your face together to shut you up.

“Don’t worry about it, okay?”

You nod your head, slurring out an “okay” with your smushed face, making you and Gerri chuckle before she drops her arms back to her sides. You miss her touch instantly.

Standing up, you feel a lot lighter than you did before coming over. Gerri just knows how to make everything better and you’re already more at ease thinking about tonight knowing she’ll be by your side.

“I’m gonna go get ready right now and I’ll come pick you up at seven,” you say, opening her bedroom door and taking a backwards step across the threshold, “Just dress like you’re going to any regular formal event.”

“Well, now I’ve got a lot of clean options to choose from,” she gestures to her rack of clean clothes, “so I’ll see you at seven!”

“Cool,” you nod, feeling a small box of candy in your jacket pocket, “Oh! Almost forgot,” you toss her the heart-shaped candy that she happily catches, “I got those at the gas station for you.”

“How romantic,” Gerri smiles as she pulls one out, reading the little printed words aloud and she shows it to you, “Be Mine?”

Before you can wonder whether her tone in that question was serious or playful, she tosses the light pink sugar heart into the air and you easily catch it in your mouth. “Seven o’clock!” You remind her while making your way down the hall.

“Seven o’clock!” Gerri repeats back to you, now having the feeling that out of all the clothes hanging in her closet, she has absolutely nothing to wear.

- Seven O’Clock -

The clock barely changed and you’ve already checked your watch five times as you anxiously waited for Gerri to walk downstairs.

You couldn’t tell if the nerves were from the possibility of being late to the restaurant or the fact that you were taking Gerri out for dinner on Valentine’s Day—not that it was going to be a great one that you’d much rather take her on.

When it comes to the person you are or the people you surround yourself with, you don’t give a shit about what your parents think, but the last thing you want is for Gerri to see you differently and believe your future is becoming carbon copies of them.

“Sorry, sweetie,” Mrs. Fields—or Kate as she prefers—gives your shoulder a comforting squeeze as she notices how tense you are, “Gerri ran a quick errand after you left, so it took her a little while to start getting ready.”

“It’s no problem. The reservation isn’t for another hour anyways.” You say, nervously messing with a rose petal from the bouquet you brought. You didn’t really consider buying Gerri flowers until your drive back over here, thinking it’s the least you could do for her agreeing to endure this torturous night.

Gerri’s mom sits across from you at the dining room table, smirking as she observes the color of the flowers you choose to bring tonight, “Are these for Gerri?” Looking up from your fiddling, you nod your head, “You do know what yellow roses with red tips mean, right?”

No, you do not. You swallow dryly at this new information, “They have different meanings? I just thought they looked the coolest.”

The older woman laughs, only inflaming the intensity of your nerves, “I’m sure you’re fine, Y/n.”

“C’mon Kate, what do yellow roses with red tips mean?” You plead for an answer before panic begins to set in.

“Just friendship…” she shrugs, leaning back to take a sip of her wine, “amongst other things.”

Your eyes widen, making her laugh even more as you smile nervously, “What other things?”

“Honey, stop torturing the poor kid,” Mr. Fields gives you a supportive pat on the back, amused at your cluelessness and for a moment you’re content, “But seriously, you don’t know what the meaning behind these roses are?”

Burying your face deep into your hands, you groan helplessly at their teasing.

You’ve grown a little used to having Gerri’s parents mess with you about possibly crushing on their daughter, but you’d be lying if you said it doesn’t fluster you. Just when you think one of them is on your side, they team up against you in the end.

“What’s so funny down here?” Gerri’s voice fills the room, silencing her mom and dad’s laughter and drawing your attention to the kitchen’s entryway.

If your heart wasn’t racing already, now it’s only a couple of beats away from pounding out of your chest.

Dressed in a red quarter-sleeve dress with floral lace designs that leave just enough room for imagination, Gerri Fields made you forget how to breathe. The girl was already naturally beautiful, so it only made sense that she could transform herself into an even more attractive goddess.

You might just run late from staring at her in complete awe.

“Y/n/n, you okay?” She nervously grins, taking note of your flustered state.

“Uhh…” Clumsily standing from the chair that skids across the floor, you can’t bring yourself to take your eyes off her, “Yeah, I’m uh…” Danny picks up your bouquet of roses and pushes them into your chest. Without looking away, you hold onto them a little too tightly, “I’m good.”

Gerri giggles softly, walking forward until she’s standing in front of you, “Are these for me?”

With a small grin, you nod, now too mentally incapacitated to move your mouth to speak, especially when she bites her lip while smiling at you like that.

“They’re beautiful.” She says, purposely letting her touch linger on you as she takes the flowers from your hands.

“You’re beautiful.” Even you’re shocked by how naturally the words fell out of your mouth, possibly flustering you more than the blushing brunette in front of you.

She briefly hides her smile behind the bouquet before lowering them down so that she can lean forward to kiss you softly on the cheek. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” You quietly say, nearly losing your voice towards the end of your sentence.

Caught in your own bubble that is Gerri, the two of you miss the knowing smiles her parents are sharing from behind you both.

Clearing your throat, you take a look at your watch and note that you still have plenty of time to make it to the restaurant. “Um, I have the car warming up in the driveway.”

Gerri’s eyes widened in realization, “Right! Sorry! Dad, could you…” she quickly hands him the roses and he moves to put them in a vase.

“Have fun, you two!” Kate yells from the kitchen as you and Gerri help put on each other’s coats by the front door.

You share a strained smile with the girl and snicker, both knowing tonight will most likely end in disaster. At least you’re not going through the fire alone this time and you wouldn’t want to have anyone else on your side.

During the 30 minute drive to the restaurant, you and Gerri sang along to every song that played on the Hits 1 radio, even the ones neither of you knew the lyrics to, and it set you at ease. Of course, Gerri’s presence alone brings you peace.

However, all of your anxiety came rushing back to the surface when you arrived at your destination.

You sat in front of the steering wheel silently for a solid five minutes, mentally preparing yourself for the amount of hell you’re going to be dragged through and how everything might go wrong. Before you can start biting at your fingernails, Gerri takes your hand and traps it between the both of hers.

“What’s going on in your head?” She asks, playing with the rings on your fingers.

“Just remembering that there’s a reason I don’t introduce anybody I care about to my family. They’re terrible people, Gerr,” leaning the side of your head against the seat, you look at the brunette, “I’ve learned how to put up with their bullshit, so I’m used to it by now, but if you’re having second thoughts about coming here with me then I—”

“Y/n.” Gerri halts your rambling, squeezing your hand between hers, “I’m here for you, okay? I don’t care how awful they are, I’m not going anywhere.”

You breathe out a large huff of air, leaning the back of your head into the headrest and closing your eyes, silently praying to any and every God that this won’t turn into the worst night of your life.

“Hey,” opening your eyes, you look back at Gerri, watching as she brings your hand to her lips and presses three soft kisses upon the skin, “All better?”

Three little big words nearly slip through your mouth, but you conceal them with a smile that nearly conveys the very message you’re keeping to yourself, “All better.”

With Gerri giving you the strength you need, you finally exit the car and her hand never leaves yours as you walk inside the restaurant.

When you give the hostess your last name, the two of you are immediately escorted to the same table your parents reserve every year. It’s a circular table that seats six in the back corner of the place, close enough to the restrooms and the A/C hits the area just right according to your mother.

God forbid anyone else takes this table and whoever does will have hell to pay. Five years ago, they made an unnecessary scene when another party was seated here and forced the manager to move them to another spot.

You still cringe at the memory to this day.

Arriving at the table, you see that your parents are already seated, but they're too distracted with their phones to realize that you’re there.

Realizing they’re not going to look up anytime soon no matter how close you get to them, you try to speak up, but your father beats you to the punch, “We’ll start with the bottle of white merlot.”

Goodness, at least this wasn’t the worst way the night could’ve started.

Gerri looks over at you and judging by the annoyance on your face, she comes to the conclusion that your dad doesn’t have a sense of humor and this isn’t him trying to be funny.

“Not the waiter, dad. It’s your child.”

His eyes never leave his phone, neither do your mothers. Instead, your dad sighs like he’d rather have the waiter here, “Hello, Y/n.”

It was pointless to go around to their seats and give them a hug like most loving children would. They weren’t exactly the physically affectionate type of parents—not with you anyways.

You shake your head before pulling out one of the empty chairs for Gerri, giving her a sorry smile as she sits down and you take the seat next to hers.

“You didn’t happen to catch your brother and his fiancee walking in, did you?” Your mother asks as you settle in.

“No, but there’s someone I want you guys to–”

“He said he’d be running late, dear.” Your father talks to your mom while scrolling through his phone.

“Guys, can you–” You try getting their attention, failing again.

“I told him traffic would be heavy right now. Hopefully they’re not too far out.” Your mom shakes her head, more concerned about your brother’s arrival rather than the stranger sitting at the table.

“Hello?” The music in this place isn’t blasting, so you know very well that they can hear you speaking.

“It looks like they’re fifteen minutes away on the tracking app.” Your dad shows her the map on his phone and she looks at it closely.

“Y/n talking here.”

“Oh yes, that’s not too far at all. They should get here right as the crabcakes are brought out. He likes them fresh.”

You clap your hands together loudly, finally capturing their attention, “Oh, good. Your ears are still working. Guys, this is my…” suddenly, you didn’t know how to introduce the girl next to you to them, your mind still calming down from them ignoring you seconds ago, “...Gerri. My-my friend Gerri.”

Blushing lightly at your first slip up, the brunette presses her lips together in a tight smile to the intimidating eyes that lock on her, “Happy anniversary, Mr. and Mrs. L/n. It’s really great to finally meet you both.”

They stare blankly at the girl in front of them without so much as a friendly smile back, then your mother looks at you, “You didn’t tell us you would be bringing a guest, Y/n.”

You clench your fist under the table, digging your fingernails into your palm to redirect the anger you’re beginning to feel, “I, uh I didn’t realize that I had to. No one usually sits in the extra chair and you guys always hound me about not bringing a friend, so…”

“I’m just saying it’s inconsiderate of you not to inform us beforehand that you were bringing someone with you. What if your brother also brought one of his friends with him?”

You shrug, “It’s almost like we’re in a restaurant that has extra chairs for that very unlikely instance.”

Your father points an accusatory finger at you and speaks in his authoritative voice, “Hey, don’t be rude to your mother, Y/n. She’s right, it was very thoughtless of you bringing this on us at the last minute.” He shakes his head at you in disappointment, returning to his cell phone.

You could go on about how rude they’re acting to Gerri after she kindly introduced herself to them, only to not even receive a simple ‘hello’ back. You would’ve taken a cold greeting in response rather than them ignoring her completely.

It was one thing for them to act like assholes to you, but when it came to the girl by your side, you were more than willing to call them out on their shit.

Before you can start a fight, Gerri keeps you from the screaming match by placing her hand over your tightened fist. Relaxing to her touch, she intertwines your fingers together and gently brushes her thumb across your skin.

“It’s okay.” She whispers with a soft smile, taking a deep breath that you instinctively mirror to relax. A small fragment of your stress fades for the moment and you give Gerri a grateful smile, reminding yourself that this dinner won’t last forever.

Your parents begin discussing work with each other, leaving you and Gerri completely out of the conversation, but you could care less.

You imagined the two of you sitting in the comfort of her bedroom, watching cheesy rom coms like Gerri had initially planned to do tonight.

Maybe you would find the moment to confess about the crush you’ve had on her since the day you met. You’d tell her how she’s the first person in your life who has ever felt like home.

You would say that you were in love, and in a perfect world, she would tell you that she feels the same.

You couldn’t say those three words out loud, not right now, so you secretly traced those letters on the palm of her hand instead.

Gerri’s lips twitch up into a faint grin when you initiate a few games of thumb war underneath the table, biting back laughter as you get a little more competitive each round. This is the first time you’re glad that your family is way too caught up in their own conversation to pay either of you any attention.

“The favorite has arrived!” Your older brother announces in a sing-song voice as he confidently saunters over to the table, his fiancée in tow a couple of feet behind him. Meanwhile, you and Gerri have broken out of your bubble.

The peace was nice while it lasted.

The bored expressions on your mom and dad’s faces change almost immediately, now beaming with happiness as their precious baby boy approaches. They stand up, engulfing their son with tight hugs and kisses on cheeks.

The stark difference as to how you were greeted shocks Gerri, but looking at your reaction or lack thereof, she can tell this was normal for you.

After your brother’s finished saying hello to your parents, he turns to you with a half-assed wave as he and his new wife take a seat, then his eyes land on Gerri.

“Who’s the new broad with you, Y/n? You had me convinced you didn’t have any friends.” He cackles idiotically.

How your brother has yet to get socked in the mouth for the things that come out of it is a mystery to you.

You wanted to confess your reasoning for never wanting to introduce your good hearted friends to your cold hearted family, but you save the argument.

“Yeah, good to see you too, Richard. This is Gerri.”

With a friendly smile, the brunette waves at him, “Hi, nice to meet you.”

He laughs like he’s just heard the funniest joke in the world, making Gerri shift in her seat uncomfortably, “Jerry? Like a guy? What, did your parents hope for a boy or were they on drugs?”

Oh. Fuck. No. You sit up a little straighter, slightly tightening your hold on Gerri’s hand, “It’s unisex, you ignorant piece of—”

“Y/n. Let’s not do this already.” Your mother quietly warns you from across the table, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Do what? He’s being disrespectful to my friend.”

“It was a joke. No need to be so sensitive about it.” Richard rolls his eyes with a scoff, snickering arrogantly with the most idiotic grin.

“Oh, I must be the one losing my hearing at this table now because not a single person here thought that was funny.”

“Christ, Y/n, will you relax? I’ve been here for two seconds and you already have a stick up your ass for no damn reason,” he looks at Gerri, “You’re being paid to be here, aren’t you, sweetheart?”

You could tackle your brother where he sits. Your jaw clenches and you have to bite your tongue to keep you from flying out of your seat, “Talk to my friend like that again and I’ll put an actual stick up your ass, Dick.”

If there’s one thing that gets under your brother’s skin, it’s when you use his all-too-accurate nickname that he lives up to.

He scowls at you next, just as ready to jump you across this table.

“That is enough, Y/n!” Your dad silences you with his raised voice that means you’re already skating on paper thin ice, “We’re not putting up with this tonight, you hear me?”

Richard smirks in victory, knowing your parents will always take his side no matter how out of line he acts. With an annoyed huff, you lean back into your seat and refocus on Gerri’s hand that’s still holding yours.

You shouldn’t have brought her here and had you known your family would be this disgustingly rude to her, you wouldn’t have invited her in the first place. Gerri was too good of a person to have to sit through this.

“It’s Richard, right?” Gerri speaks up, earning your brother’s attention and he nods, “Well, Richard, the answer to your previous question is no, I’m not being paid to be here. Y/n talked about how important this night is to your family and because of how important they are to me, I came. I also don’t appreciate the inappropriate jokes you made to me like we’ve known each other for years even though we just met.”

“I assure you, he meant no ill intent with his comments towards you. That’s just how he is.” Your mother comes in for the rescue, making infinite excuses for the thirty year old man who has the brain of a psychotic, tantrum-throwing toddler.

“Seriously, mom? He’s a grown man. There’s no need to jump to his aid like he’s a kid who’s been pushed on the playground during recess.”

Richard rolls his eyes, “Jesus, why do you have to ruin the night for everyone? It’s mom and dad’s anniversary for Christ's sake.”

“You’re saying inappropriate things to my guest. If this were the other way around, all of you would be on my ass.”

“Yeah because every time you come out with us now, you act like a psychotic little brat. I honestly miss when you were quieter because your bullshit is fucking exhausting to put up with.”

You laugh heartily in disbelief, “Oh, you find me exhausting? Now that’s a great joke, Dick. Seriously.”

His face burns red and you can almost see smoke blowing out of his elephant ears, “Fucking Christ,” he groans, pausing for a beat as he debates on whether or not he should say more. With just enough wine in his system, he decides to say, “You know, this is exactly why I didn’t want you at our wedding.”

Your amused smile begins to fade and you give him an inquisitive look, “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Richie.” Your mother sighs as she pinches the bridge of her nose, but she doesn’t look guilty.

“What, you thought your invite got lost in the mail or something?” He teases with a sickening grin when he sees that he’s properly shut you up, “Thought it was just a simple mistake?”

“Rich.” Your father warns and that’s when you see the golden wedding band on Richard’s ring finger.

“Newsflash, you weren’t sent one in the first place and the way you’re acting tonight is a spectacular example as to why that was. I didn’t need you fucking things up on the happiest day of my life, so mom, dad and I came to an agreement. The wedding would be a close friends and family only event. We all think you’ve proven yourself to be neither of those things.”

You look to your parents, the smallest part of you hoping they’d come to your aid just for once in their goddamn lives. Instead, they remain silent in their seats, awkwardly sipping on their wine and avoid eye contact with you completely.

Fucking typical.

You could break down right at this table because of how terrible this night is going. Not that you expected anything less, but it was embarrassing to have this happening in front of the only person you care about in the room, witnessing you get tormented by the people who were supposed to love you unconditionally.

The sound of Gerri’s laughter catches you off guard and your attention turns to her.

“I’m sorry, are you people out of your mind? Do you-do any of you know anything about this person right here? Like, have you actually tried getting to know them?”

Your family is silent, some huffing out annoyed sighs, but you’re only staring at Gerri as she continues.

“Did you know they can finish a six page essay in one hour and end up getting an A? Or that they’re a master at balloon darts and can hit two at once? Or that they know every lyric to Taylor Swift’s entire discography? Or the fact they hate dancing but will do it anyway just to make you smile? Or that they will help you do just about any house chore out of the kindness of their heart without asking for anything in return?”

Your gaze softens as your heart fills with nothing but love for the woman sitting by your side. All you could look at was her and fall even deeper into all that she was–your parents and brother no longer taking an inch of space in your mind.

“Within the twenty-something years you had to really know your own child and sibling, I only needed one to see that they’re pretty fucking incredible and it absolutely blows my mind that such an amazing person can come from assholes like you.”

Eyes widening slightly at the sudden profanity, you look over at the mortified expressions on your family’s faces at Gerri’s closing statement. “How dare you speak to us that way, young lady.”

“No, how dare you for showing so much love and attention to Satan’s spawn while neglecting the literal best thing in your life.”

“I think it’s time for you to leave. Both of you.” Your father says sternly, looking around the establishment for a manager to wave over.

Gerri sighs in relief, pushing out her chair first and you slowly follow suit as she pulls you with her, “That we can agree on.”

Moving around the table, you don’t miss when Richard mutters, “Bitch.”

Knowing you’ve already caused a scene, you thought it wouldn’t hurt to spill his glass of red wine all over his white button up and khakis. “Dick.” You mutter back, not wasting another second being in their presence and quickly making your way out of the restaurant.

The drive back to Gerri’s house is radio silent, the two of you processing tonight’s catastrophe. When you pull up to the house, Gerri breathes heavily as you walk through the front door, the grip on your hand tighter than the one you had on hers.

While she was coming up with different ways to murder your family in her head, your mind was still reeling in the fact she had the courage to stick up for you in front of the people she just met and that you couldn’t love her more for it.

The brunette sighs in exhaustion, turning to face you when you find your way into her bedroom, her mind still running a million miles a minute from what just happened, “I’m sorry for flipping out in there, I just couldn’t fucking stand them talking to you like mmph–”

You abruptly cut Gerri’s sentence short, using your free hand to cup her face and press your lips against hers. She gasps in surprise, taking a few seconds to process the new sensation but then quickly matches the kiss before you can think about pulling away.

Her lips move against yours softly and sweetly as she feels her knees begin to weaken slightly, needing to slide her hands onto your shoulders to keep herself from falling.

Though you’re both completely lost in each other’s touch, Gerri suddenly recalls the situation you just walked out on and gasps, being the first to break the kiss.

“Oh my God, I totally fucked things up for you back there didn’t I?” She pants, her breath blowing across your face as hers remains close.

You could care less about the effects of tonight’s dinner from your parents. The one thing you knew for certain was you wanted to hold Gerri and not let her go, “I’ll figure it out.”

Your lips find Gerri’s again, feeling like it was exactly where you were supposed to be. The brunette sighs with contentment, her arms now wrapping around your neck to pull you closer as your hands slide down her waist.

“I really like you.” You say between kisses, making the girl laugh through her nose.

“I really like you, too.” She whispers.

Your big idiotic smiles makes it harder to keep kissing each other, but you do so anyways. With one last long lingering soft press against her lips, you slowly pull away, leaning back just enough to get a better look at the brunette’s face.

Her sea green eyes stare into yours longingly and you swear that looking into them feels like home. One that you’ve been searching for forever and one you’ve found that doesn’t need four walls and a roof, just those gorgeous orbs that make you feel the most peaceful you’ve ever felt.

“Y/n, I-”

“Gerr-”

You speak over each other, immediately laughing afterwards as your heads lean forward until they’re leaning together once more.

“You go first.” You offer.

“What if we both go?” Gerri suggests, brushing her nose against yours and making your head spin faster than it already was.

“What if we say two different things?”

She softly bites her lip, containing a small smile, “Call it a hunch.”

You chuckle, feeling your heart begin to beat harder and race faster at the thought of her thinking those same three words as you.

Leaning your head away, you meet her eyes and nod.

“Okay. On three.” You say, squeezing her waist in anticipation. “One.”

“Two.”

The both of you take a deep breath, “Three.”

“I love you.” You say in unison, making your breath hitch at the sound of her confession. For a moment you think you’re imagining things until Gerri smiles widely.

“God, I love you so much.” She repeats, pulling you forward by your shirt to bring your lips back to hers, kissing you slow and languidly.

Matching her tenderness, your hands slide around and up Gerri’s back, pressing her body impossibly closer to yours like she would fly away if you let her go.

She sighs against your mouth, guiding herself backwards until the backs of her knees meet the edge of the bed and she pulls you down on the mattress with her. One of your hands is quick to move onto the cushion to keep yourself from crushing the girl beneath you, but your lips never leave each other’s.

Beginning to lose oxygen, you reluctantly pull away but continue your trail of kisses over to her cheek, along her jawline, and down to her neck. Gerri’s eyes remain closed, fingers now tangling through your hair and your lips set her skin on fire.

She gasps softly when you find the spot that drives her crazy and she holds you there, craning her neck back to allow you more access and moaning as your tongue runs over her pulse point.

Before she can further lose herself in your touch and grow even more tempted to rip off your clothes in record time, something else pops into the brunette’s mind.

“Shit, I almost forgot!” She gasps, making you abruptly stop what you’re doing and pull away to look down at her with a worried expression.

“What? What is it?” You pant with a face of concern that makes Gerri smile adoringly.

“I got you something.” She says, pecking your lips once more before urgently pushing you to the side and making you roll over on your back.

Relieved that it wasn’t a serious matter, you chuckle as you watch her push off the bed and quickly grab a small box from the dresser.

You push yourself to sit up on the mattress when she takes a seat next to you, nervously biting her lip as she places the item in your hands.

“Little early for a proposal, isn’t it?” You tease, getting Gerri to nudge you slightly.

“Shut up and open it.” She wraps an arm around your back, tracing gentle patterns with her fingers while resting her chin on top of your shoulder and placing a kiss on your cheek.

You smile, excitedly examining the little cardboard box for a second before removing the cover and revealing a single golden key with a chain necklace and a small engraving of Gerri’s initials at the top. Recognizing each curve and edge of the metal, you immediately know what it’s meant to unlock.

“Now you’re able to come and go as you please, free of being pricked by digging through Barry to get the spare.” She tells you with a soft smile, taking the long chain out of the box and delicately placing it over your head until it rests on your neck.

Looking down at the gift, you take it between your fingers and graze your thumb along Gerri’s initials. A few tears build in your eyes, feeling more love from the beautiful soul next to you within a single night than you have for your entire life.

“You’ll always have a home here, Y/n.” She utters, one hand traveling up to scratch along the nape of your neck while she presses another kiss to the single tear falling down your cheek.

Chuckling softly, your head turns to look at the brunette with a loving stare that she returns. “Having you around alone, anywhere is home for me, Gerri.”

You and the brunette met at university and to say that you have become inseparable since then is a great understatement.

The connection between the two of you was surprising not only to you but to all your friends.

After the friendship, it didn't take long for other feelings to develop between the two of you. However, just as they were intense, they were also hidden.

You fell in love with Gerri's goofy ways, and the brunette fell in love with your stubborn and determined manner that seemed to be much more apparent with her. Neither of you talked about it, though.

And then time passed and the winter break arrived.

Gerri was going to stay in New York, of course, her family was from here after all. But you were going back to California, to your hometown.

The idea of being away was very badly received by both of you. But you couldn't find an excuse convincing enough to stay, much less Gerri found one to ask you to stay.

And so, you came home and Gerri hasn't been able to stop thinking about you ever since.

Christmas at the brunette's house would be like all the others, dull and boring. This year, however, there is something more. The urge to see you, to be with you, to...

Screw it.

This is what goes through Gerri's mind as she makes up her mind.

Without a second thought, the brunette buys the first ticket she can find to Los Angeles, not even bothering to pack more than a simple backpack.

Telling her mom about this minor change of plans was easier than she expected. But that's only because she did it over the phone on the way to the airport, hanging up on her mother as soon as she started screaming that her daughter had lost her mind.

But all good things are short-lived, so it didn't take long for the first problem to appear.

Gerri hates snow.

She didn't hate it five minutes ago. But now that the damn ice crystals had delayed her flight, she hated them deeply.

Half an hour. One hour. Two hours. Fuck!

The brunette was about to pull every hair out of her head when finally the damn airport speakers announced that they had arranged a new flight for her, and Gerri rushes to the gate indicated by the employee.

Checking the time on her cell phone before turning it off for the flight, the brunette sighs heavily. She would land in Los Angeles around 7:30. Not such a bad time, right?

And we come to the second problem: Gerri now hates cars too.

Let's face it, it was obvious that the streets would be crowded at this time on Christmas Eve. But where are all those Christmas clichés when you need them?

Honestly? Homophobic.

In the back seat of the car, the brunette anxiously watches the minutes tick by on her cell phone screen. The car is not moving at any moment.

To make things worse, the driver didn't seem to be in a hurry at all, unlike her.

With an impatient huff, Gerri programs the map app to check how far it is to your house.

20 minutes. Not like this. An idea crosses her mind.

This is stupid. Oh, this is so stupid. But it's you, so it would be worth it.

Without a second thought (for the coincidentally second time that day), Gerri opens the door and steps out.

⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅ ⋇ ⋅

Christmas is one of your favorite days of the year. It lost some of its fun without Gerri here, though.

To make matters worse, the girl was not answering any of your texts and you were growing bored.

Trying to distract yourself with food and your family's conversations helped a little, but only briefly.

"Y/n!" Your sister calls your name as you check your cell phone for what must be the twentieth time that night, and you raise your eyes to her with a furrow of your eyebrows.

"It's for you." She announces in a sing-song voice, a knowing glance directed at you that only makes you more curious.

When you reach the door, however, your confusion turns to astonishment.

"Gerri?" You ask shocked, but the girl smiles easily, admiring the face she has missed so much over the past few days. "Hi."

"What are you doing here?" You ask curiously, closing the door behind you and muffling the sound of the party inside.

"I came...to see you." The brunette replies, pausing as she breathes heavily, her hand on her belly. You furrow your brows even deeper, an amused chuckle escaping your lips as you ask, "are you all right?"

"Almost, I'm recovering," Gerri replies, resting her hands on her knees as she takes deep breaths in an attempt to get herself together. "The traffic here is terrible."

"You can't really complain, New Yorker." You snidely retort, making the other girl laugh softly. As the pieces begin to fit together in your mind, you widen your eyes in wonder. "Did you walk all the way here?"

"I ran, actually." The brunette tells, straightening her posture finally and looking at you. "Only the last twenty minutes of the drive."

"Did you spend twenty minutes running or did you run the twenty minutes that would've been by car?" You ask with a single raised eyebrow, and a key seems to turn in the girl's mind. So that's why those supposed twenty minutes seemed so long.

"Yes." She answers playfully, refusing to tell you that it was indeed the second option, and you chuckle softly, shaking your head in amused disapproval. Soon, however, your posture returns to a curious one. "What are you doing here, Gerri?"

"I need to talk to you." She says hesitantly, and you can't help but notice her fingers anxiously playing with her rings. You raise an eyebrow teasingly. "Have you ever heard of phones?"

"It needed to be in person." The brunette confesses amidst a giggle, her cheeks taking on a shade of pink that blends in with the previous pink from running. "Couldn't you wait until after school starts?"

"Do you want me to leave?" She retorts in a playful tone of irritation and you laugh softly, the sound making Gerri smile immediately.

With a theatrical motion of your hand, you indicate for the brunette to speak. Despite the teasing, your eyes are tender and full of expectation, giving Gerri the courage to speak.

"I love you." She breathes out, and the confession makes the eyes of both of you go wide. "Damn, this wasn't smooth at all." The brunette mumbles next, but noticing that you are too stunned to say anything, she takes a deep breath.

"It's the truth, though. I love you and I've tried to tell you this all semester, but I haven't had the courage because you're beautiful and so, so sweet, and amazing and perfect... What was I talking about again?"

You bite your lip in a smile, relishing the girl's passionate, almost hypnotized look your way. Deciding to disguise the rapid beating of your heart, you joke, "You were professing your undying love for me."

"Right. That's right." The brunette confirms, nodding energetically, and you let out a brief happy giggle, Gerri joining you with a shy one.

"So?" She asks, a tone so hesitant and expectant that all you can think to do is step forward.

The brunette watches wide-eyed as you put your hands on her cheeks, your lips moving slowly toward hers.

Despite the complete flustered mess your proximity has turned the girl into, Gerri meets you halfway, her hands making their way to your waist, pulling you close.

With her brain completely devoted to drinking in your presence, Gerri is only able to formulate three thoughts:

1) your lips are deliciously soft;

2) you taste like home;

3) she wants to kiss you forever.

Unfortunately, however, the third thought does not come true, and you slowly pull away from her.

"I love you too." You whisper against her lips, and Gerri swallows hard, trying to regain the rhythm of her heartbeat.

"Are you sure? I think I'm going to need more confirmation." She replies breathlessly, her eyes completely drawn to the smile you flash next before leaning in once more.

The second kiss is even better than the first. But unfortunately, like the first, it too comes to an end.

"Come on now, let's get you something to eat to refuel your energy for the marathon." You tease, your hand coming down from her face just to hold hers, and Gerri smiles.

"Just for the record, it was totally worth it." The brunette informs, raising her index finger in the air to emphasize her words, and making you laugh softly as you lead her inside.

All-day long, Gerri didn't think that by coming here she would also meet your family, and the girl was about to combust from timidity.

But it's okay because you would stay with her the whole time, your hand caressing hers to reassure her whenever everything seemed too much.

And she didn't know it yet, but you were as much hers as she was yours.

Everything would be all right.

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And that's it for today! I hope you enjoyed it, thoughts and comments are always welcome ツ