#garbage barge

Oh no, it’s another road trip travelogue. At the beginning of August, my two best buds and I drove up to Montreal from New York and had an extremely charming time. Here are my notes, featuring narwhals, toilet plants, a garbage barge, a graveyard, several breakfasts, Leonard Cohen, Librairie Drawn & Quarterly, “luxury rubbish,” Blink-182 (Syd wanted to note that we all sang along), dirt bowls, nickel-sized hail, and disco water. Please forgive my awful French.

Hi there.

I actually don’t read much fanfiction tbh? Because frankly I have too many of my own ideas and interpretations of most Things™ (Hellsing especially) to really be satisfied with fics. That sounds self centered. I dont feel like rewording it.

I know of several bad fics (and I mean BAD. Not even So Bad It’s Beautiful. Just BAD), one of which bothered me so much that I took its premise and vowed to rewrite it PROPERLY, but have honestly not done much searching beyond whats been rec’d to me.

My Hellsing and Garbage Barge tags are full of my ramblings and headcanons and overall A+ Quality Trash Content. And I have scores of interpretations on multiple characters and elements that I’d be willing to talk about, but tbh you gotta be more specific bc I dont even know exactly where to start.

As for New Content–

If you enjoyed Hellsing for its roots in 19th century English literature, try The Earl Cain Saga. It’s kind of like Black Butler, except it came out first and is better. Set in Victorian London, lots of heavy influence from mystery legends like Poe and Conan Doyle. And there are vampires at one point.

If you’re looking for some high fantasy type stuff that still has vampires, I personally enjoyed Vampire Game by Judal. Interesting worldbuilding, lots of good visual comedy, and some of the weirdest and most confusing family trees ever. Which can lead to some awkward bits, but usually born from understandable confusions. (Spoiler: everyone who thinks they’re related, aren’t and everyone who thinks they aren’t, are.)

For more fluffyness, but with a hint of monster goodness, The Ancient Magus Bride. Once again, heavy influence from celtic mythology and european fairy tales, and one of the coolest designs for a Beast character I’ve seen in a while.

I’ve honestly fallen a bit out of the loop with the hip new anime du jour thanks to college, but I’ve kinda always been an unintentional anime hipster who gravitates more towards old shit that almost never got an animated adaptation.

this surprises me none.

SFW:

2:Dinner headcanon 

I can’t imagine they’d go out very often, seeing as Alucard doesn’t exactly eat regular meals. They probably go out for drinks now and then, though. Probably someplace quiet. Knowing Integra, probably someplace with a dress code. But for the most part I imagine meals are taken at the mansion. He’s tried sitting with her while she eats but they both found it somewhat awkward. 

Also whenever she’s pissed at him and in the mood to be petty she stares him dead in the eye and eats an entire raw garlic clove

9: How friends/family of the couple react

I feel like this would depend entirely on who they first hear it from. Integra would probably not acknowledge it too much, but if Seras or Walter were to ask she would probably give some nonchalant confirmation without even looking up from her paperwork. 

Alucard on the other hand would probably shoot through a wall just to poke his head through and tell Walter they’re banging. 

I’m gonna be merciful and put NSFW under the cut. 

NSFW oh lord

2: Rough or gentle? Fast or slow?

9: Who teases the other? Who’s more impatient? Who usually initiates?

So I’m gonna answer both of these at once because they kinda overlap a bit. 

Integra definitely initiates. Alucard loves being bossed around, he literally gets hard from it WITHIN CANON. That said he’s probably the more impatient one and she’s not at all afraid to make him beg. 

I’ve said before that the word “vanilla” does not exist in this pair’s vocabulary and I stick to it. However, I do think on occasion things might be taken a bit slower.

Essentially they have two modes: 

“Let’s just have one normal thing for a minute” and “I love it when you’re screaming and covered in blood” 

Stuart Little 2 - Garbage Barge:

"This has to be the coolest looking stage in the game. I really like to explore giant ships in games, and this is a good take on it. A very good level to play, before we deal with the final boss."

Because Sam and Dean are garbage.

This show is about two garbage brothers who love each other so much, they will fuck over the entire planet and the afterlife for one another. They’ve caused so much death, destruction, and general unhappiness that they deserve each other.

Castiel has done nothing but his best. And yes he’s made some bad decisions FOR DEAN, but he doesn’t deserve the treatment he’s received. If Dean wasn’t the biggest bastard in the world (Except for maybe for bitchface Sam Winchester), I could consider it. But it’s like. No. Dean doesn’t deserve such a nice sweet wonderful boyfriend.

And in before the “Don’t ship incest ships, that’s gross!” crowd. I agree with you. Shipcest is pretty disgusting. But look at who I’m talking about. These horrible monsters would each trade ANYBODY in for the other. They don’t care. How many people do they claim they love and then allow to die? Or put in harm’s way? They’re gross. They deserve eachother.