i never wrote you a letter, but today i thought that maybe i should. i really don't know how to start this. it was never easy for me to express my feelings verbally, and this case is quite different... because its going to be hard, but here goes nothing.
it’s been 3 years already, huh? thinking about it I'm totally not the same person you knew 3 years back. life took a toll on me and well, the past two years especially were rough. family problems, i lost confidence in myself, my self esteem was completely gone, i wasn't doing as well as i hoped in university, i worked extra hard and never saw any progress, i lost an artist that i adored so much, and his passing is something i still struggle with till this day, and recently have been diagnosed with depression and high levels of anxiety. crazy, right? and a bit overwhelming if you ask me. but, to mention something positive, i did graduate from university, and thats something to be proud of, right? currently, i’m trying my best to get better. sometimes I'm in a hurry to get back on my feet and get frustrated with myself, but I'm accepting that it’ll take time, and I'm being patient. i hope you can watch me grow and heal properly and be proud of me. i promise i will continue doing my best.
and well thats a life update from my side!
continuing,
super junior is doing well, there are ups and downs here and there but you know our boys, they’re so strong and get through everything together. can you believe that our kyu is discharging from the military soon?? i’m sure if you were still here you would’ve waited for him and anticipated this moment! thinking about it, this would’ve been your 10th year as an elf!! please continue to look over our boys from up there. i’m counting on you💙
we’ve never met, and that’s the downside of meeting great friends on the internet. regardless, what an amazing friend you were. i loved our daily texting, fangirling moments and crazy snaps which were part of our normal (yet hectic) lives, a part that i miss so dearly. you come to my mind out of nowhere sometimes, and i feel this hole in my heart every time. and i don't know what to do with this feeling but accept it.
i still remember the little things about you, how you contemplate so much over whether to buy a cute outfit or save your money (which always ends up with you purchasing it anyway), the love you had for brunches and food in general (and i would always be so jealous cause everything always looked so good!!), your aesthetically pleasing instagram posts, how you enjoyed dancing, traveling, and so much more.
for me, you’ll always be this beautiful person who was so full of love and had a big heart, a person who loved life and lived it to the fullest, a person that was so full of happiness and positivity. a ray of sunshine💗
ps! you were right, kyuhyun is way more beautiful in person❤️
i miss you so much, you know that, right?
I love you so much, Anh.
& will always continue to love you
@gaemq
from, Ala











