#fuzzler

Ok so fuzzlers are the yellow orange things that roll on rails in Mario 3d world for those who don't know

Alright so first: I headcannon them to be creatures that thrive best in areas with a large water source, especially if the area has a waterfall

Second: they are toxic to touch, like fuzzy caterpillars. So touching them will give you a horrible blistering rash

third: they can shoot spores out of their bodies when they feel they are in danger, these spores also cause a horrible rash

Fourth: if you can get past the rash part, they are actually really soft and they love to cuddle

Fifth: they eat mostly greens but they love honey. If you want to get on their good side real fast, give them some honey

Sixth: they love to swim and are great swimmers

Name: Fuzzy

Debut: Super Mario World

Just because something is a pretty common enemy doesn’t mean it can’t be weird, you know! We have all been jaded to the weirdness of the Mario world. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? I don’t know! 

Fuzzies are dang weird. I don’t know why they’re called Fuzzies. Is that really the most notable thing about them? There is just a LOT going on with these things, and I have no what, if anything, they’re supposed to be. I guess you could say the details are fuzzy!

So. In the main series games, Fuzzies patrol a set path, often in groups, and the path itself is often visible as a white line. They can’t be jumped on, hurting Mario upon contact unless he’s invincible. But why?! If they’re fuzzy, then why do they hurt? Is it the gnashing teeth, I guess?

You look at this thing and tell me it looks like it has fur of any sort!

“That curious, bouncing ball of fur is a Fuzzy...“ -Tippi, Super Paper Mario

...I see, then, I guess they do have fur. But why is it so... spiky? Jolty? Erratic? I don’t even know how to describe it! And why do there seem to be drips coming off in the official art? Is it pulsating so violently that it’s SHEDDING?

Fuzzy behaves quite a bit differently in the Paper Mario series, where it is shown to be a parasitic creature! Its attack, called “Kissy-Kissy”, damages Mario while healing itself. 

In Mario and Luigi: Super Star Saga, Fuzzies only appear as projectiles used by an enemy known as the Fuzzbush. Oh? Is this lore? I think it is! Keeping with the weird parasitic theme, these projectile Fuzzies cause poison on contact. Maybe Fuzzies are somehow plant-like after all! Or maybe they simply live within Fuzzbushes, and their hair is more like the poisonous hairs of tarantula, rather than mammalian fur.

Then, in Super Mario 3D World, we have... the Fuzzy Time Mine! Upon entering this mine shaft, Mario and friends must escape a massive horde of Fuzzies, which behaves almost like a liquid, even! So do Fuzzies lurk deep underground? Are they a commodity that one mines for? Are they the miners?!

Last but not least, I would like to draw your attention to the Fuzzler, also from 3D World. Like its name suggests, it’s like a cross between a Fuzzy and a Wiggler. What really stands out to me is how they used the Fuzzy’s spiky/pulsating look to communicate that it’s a considerable hazard that moves along rails. Even if not intentional, it sure adds even more weirdness to think about! Is this convergent evolution?

In conclusion... there is weirdness all around! Don’t take it for granted! Appreciate it! Like... elephants. They’re one of the most well-known animals and they have a gigantic tentacle for a nose. That’s weird! That’s wonderful!