cleo remembered scoffing upon being told by the producers that this video diary she had to film wasn’t going to be shown to anyone. bullshit. everyone knew how these reality shows went - anything and everything filmed and said after signing the contract could and would be seen by anyone. and anyone who naively thought otherwise was, in her opinion, an idiot and probably deserved getting screwed over by some reality tv producers who were thirsty for views. she, on the other hand, was far from an idiot. so answering these questions as honest as possible like they’d asked? well, cleo was never particularly one to hold back, even knowing others would see her video. with the exception of maybe one question...
deciding to film her video on her drive to work, she propped her phone up on the dash, then pressed record. “hey, it’s cleo. i’ve been asked to do a quick Q&A before the show starts filming. and honestly, if i wasn’t being paid to do this, i would’ve said no. but here we are, so let’s get a little up close and personal, shall we?” wiggling her brows playfully, she smirked at the camera before her eyes returned to the road. “so, first question - do you see a future with marco?” she recited the question from memory, followed by a short laugh. “god, they’re really just going right for it, aren’t they?” referring to the producers. it was a question she ( and maybe even marco ) had been avoiding for quite a while and the fact that she had to answer it now for a reality show was definitely not how she’d planned to address it.
coming to a stop at a red light, she looked into the camera as she answered, “the short answer is yes, i do. we’ve been in each other’s lives for so long now, it’d almost be... weird to not have him there. but whether or not we’ll still be together is a different story. that’s probably not what the producers were looking for, but it’s a fucking loaded question, alright? all i know is marco and i will... probably always be a part of each other’s lives somehow and i’ll always -,” splat! letting out a string of curse words as her phone fell off the dash when she accelerated too hard, cleo quickly repositioned the device before focusing on the road again.Â
“anyways, second question was something about whether or not i’ve cheated on anyone before.” taking a pause as she pretended to mull over her answer, she hummed, “hmm... no, i haven’t had to be that spiteful yet. but who the fuck knows? marco can be a real dick sometimes.” she knew the producers were going to eat that shit up, but that’s what this was all about, right? whatever it took to get those views? and it was views that brought in the paycheques. “you know how the saying goes - cheat or be cheated on,” she added jokingly, as she winked at the camera.
“next question was um... do you plan on leaving big bear as well as the sloth once you get your trust fund back?” drumming her fingers on the steering wheel, cleo again contemplated her answer, only for real this time. it was never a simple yes or no, was it? “there’s more to it than the trust fund thing, but ultimately, yes i do. my home is in new york, my life is in new york. c’mon, does anyone actually want to spend the rest of their life in middle-of-nowhere big bear?” glancing out the side window before she focused in front of her again, she added, “but i’ll always come back to visit. not to sound like a sappy sentimental bitch, but big bear’s kind of become my second home. so... ya. there’s that.”Â
“shit, okay, finally a good question. who is the one person you would kick out from the sloth? ya fucking right - only one?? you might as well ask me who i wouldn’t kick out,” she laughed to herself. “ya, fuck that. let me break it down for you. there’s dory, who’s got some holier-than-thou stick up her ass. we hooked up once in high school, but honestly, half the time, i forget that even happened because that’s how below average that whole experience was.” with two fingers held up, cleo pointed out the second person. “next, the blonde with the creepy furby obsession. hannah? helena? hayley? who the fuck knows. you guys don’t need to know because if someone was actually going to get voted off, she’d be first in a heartbeat.” with a third finger pointed up, she continued, “charlotte. fucking charlotte. where do i even begin? okay, listen. no one is ever that fucking nice out of the kindness of their heart. it’s fake as hell and honestly, she’s probably secretly a psychopath. i’m pretty sure she was obsessed with jason at one point. maybe she still is.”Â
“riley would be on this list too if he wasn’t so great at giving massages. so i suppose he’s fine, for now,” she added, bringing down her hand. parking the car, cleo paused, then continued, “you know what? i’m gonna add marco to that list too, but you may just have to watch the show to find out why.” holding up the camera in front of her now, cleo flashed a smile. “and that about wraps it up. if you wanna watch yours truly and a bunch of idiots hanging out in the bahamas, then make sure you check out mtv’s sloth in paradise!”
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