#friendlycash

3/31/25 10:54pm <3

For a long time, I wondered if I was truly lovable. I searched for validation in relationships, hoping that if someone loved me, it would prove I was worthy. But deep down, I knew something was missing I didn’t fully believe in my own worth.

Chasing Love to Fill the Void

I used to think that if someone cared about me, it would be enough to make me feel whole. But the truth is, no amount of external love could fix the way I saw myself. If I didn’t feel worthy, I questioned every compliment, doubted every kind gesture, and sometimes even pushed people away. Love felt like something I had to earn, rather than something I naturally deserved.

The Struggle to Accept Love

Even when I was in relationships, I found it hard to fully receive love. I worried I wasn’t “enough” or that one wrong move would make them leave. I settled for less than I deserved because I didn’t believe I could ask for more. The problem wasn’t that no one loved me—it was that I didn’t know how to believe in that love.

Learning to See My Own Worth

Over time, I realized that self-worth isn’t about what I accomplish, how I look, or whether someone else loves me. It’s about how I see myself. I started:

Recognizing my strengths and flaws without tearing myself down.

Setting boundaries to protect my energy and emotional well-being.

Speaking to myself with kindness instead of criticism.

Surrounding myself with people who uplifted me instead of draining me.

Love Starts With Me

I now understand that love from others is beautiful, but it can’t replace the love I need to have for myself. When I see my own worth, love feels different—more real, more fulfilling, more secure.

April 17, 2025 <3

I waited. For the text. The call. The apology. The change.

I waited through the silence, through the hollow spaces where your presence used to be. I waited because I thought you were the piece I was missing—that maybe if you came back, everything would feel whole again.

But time has a way of teaching you things. Quietly. Slowly. And sometimes painfully.

And after all that waiting, I finally realized…

I don’t need you. I never did.

What I really needed was me.

I needed to stand up for myself, to show up for myself, to pour into myself the way I used to pour into you. The love I gave you so freely—I needed to redirect that energy to myself. The patience, the compassion, the unwavering support—I needed to offer that to the person in the mirror.