#foldinclothes

we the ones that got to wear our face backwards

put your frown on before they think you soft

never smile long or take your defense off

acting tough so much we start to feel hard

live from the city where they pull cards

i got a glock 40 and a little nine

ready for the day a nigga pull mine

niggas from the hood is the best actors

got learn to speak in ways that's unnatural

just to make it through the job interviews

if my niggas heard me, they'd say "damn what’s gotten into you?"

just trying to make it dog, somehow

peaking through the blinds, i see the sun now

i see you're still sleeping and it feels like

maybe everything is gon' be alright

HEEYY BIG HEAD

The inspiration for my blog post comes from “Foldin’ Clothes” by J. Cole. Go ahead and throw it on, you know you want too. Here’s the link (https://youtu.be/GN3C5mvajcE)

A few years back I met this guy and made a silly bet with my friends. He came at a time in my life when I was getting out of a crazy relationship. At this point in my life I was entering my wild child phase and starting college all while breaking up my psychotic ex. By psychotic I mean restraining orders and court dates. During this time he was my shoulder to cry on when I needed it. He was my late night text buddy. He was my math tutor despite being all the way in FL at college. He was intelligent, charming, handsome, hilarious… I could go on and on. My freshman and Fall semester sophomore year in college I was a wild child. If I wasn’t studying you could find me out partying. I was raised prim and proper so the moment I got a taste of freedom I went wild. I cannot tell you all the countless conversations we had about me calming down. I guess our talks finally helped because here we are a few years later. It wasn’t always a fairytale but somehow we managed.

He’s been able to bring out my softer side again. He made me take my guard down. Over the years it’s been the little things that he does that makes me smile. Taking the garbage out without me having to ask. Tidying up around the apartment. His willingness to cook when I’m worn out. He’s my Mr. Fix It when something breaks around the apartment. He either helps with laundry or does it himself. He has helped me move 3 times. If you’re reading this my dear, get ready for the biggest move this autumn. He wakes me up to remind me take my contacts out and put my bonnet on. The bonnet and contacts might seem small to some but I’m not the friendliest person if someone wakes me. He’s the person I look for when I have anxiety attacks. He encourages my fitness journey. He even indulges in my sometimes endless pageant talk. He gives the best compliments. The list of things he does for me goes on and on. The amount of times I smile and laugh because of him by far out weighs the times I’ve cried, fussed, and argued. We started off as teens in our church choir that got caught up in a bet I made with a mutual friend. Some years later here we are as 20 somethings one being a pilot the other trying to obtain a masters degree in Political Science. We’re learning from each other. Growing with each other. Encouraging each other to reach our goals. Not sure how we got to this point but I wouldn’t trade this school girl laugh and amazing glow for anything.

…with all that being said, HEEEYYYY BIG HEAD. Lol thanks babe for everything you do. Lord knows I don’t say thank you enough.