#florence lyons

Read Chapter Nine or Start at Chapter One

"[Alice]'s going to be a great mom one day," Mary said with a soft little smile. "Her and Frank's future little chubby babs give me such a serotonin kick."

"I knoooooow! I'm gonna be Auntie Flo and..." Flo suddenly sat bolt upright, a look of pure horror crashing across her face. "I'm going to be Aunt Flo!" she wailed.

It took Mary and her sleep-fogged brain a second to catch on, but when she did, she nearly fell off the bed trying to contain her giggles. "Ohhh oh no," she gasped, pink-cheeked and bright-eyed. "Ohhh bab, we'll come up with a different name for you, I promise I promise," Mary giggled, covering her mouth to hopefully avoid invoking the neighbour's wrath again.

"Sorry, can't wear a white bathing suit, Aunt Flo is in town..." Flo twisted and hid in Mary's chest with a cry of despair. "Mum, Daddy, why did you do this to me!?"

Mary wrapped her arms around Flo's despondent form and stroked her back soothingly, though her body still shook with muffled giggles. "We'll call you Teri or Theresa or—ohhh, Aunt Lyon-ess, that would be fun!"

"Aunt Flora," Flo suggested. "You'll have to start calling me Flora, so it sticks..."

"Flora," Mary sounded out, the r gently rolling off her tongue with her unbridled accent. "Ooh, that sounds proper Spanish it does!" she chirped. "Flora Ma...hm...Maria Theresa Lyons—no, de Leon," she corrected, her Spanish accent abysmal except for the Brummie-born rolled r, though she was quite proud of her effort.

"Flora Maria?" Flo asked, making herself comfortable on Mary's shoulder. "You muscling in on my name, Mac?"

Mary smiled and shrugged, careful not to dislodge Flo. "You wanted something different. It sounds pretty! Foreign. Sexy. Could be your alter ego. She wears red stilettos and dances the paso doble!"

Read Chapter 21 or Start at Chapter One

From the Hogwarts Hotties (and Remus) chat:

(Flawless - Flo; Jacked - James; Magical - Mary; Suave - Severus; Alluring - Alice; Lovely - Lily; Frisky - Frank; Risque - Remus)

#JamesHimboPotter (protect at all costs)

Hard to believe we're 150k words in already! Buckle up, this week is exceptionally smutty. (I may have sort of been dropping all of those drabbles in preparation for what lies ahead. :D)

Chapter 22, a Valentine's Day Chapter!, coming ~7 AM EST Feb 14!

Read Chapter 16 or Start at Chapter One

"James, you are not buying food tonight!" Flo said as Remus helped her off of Lily's shoulders. "We got you!" It would be horribly unfair for him to pay for a meal after he'd footed the bill for the tickets. Lily was already mapping out a payment plan in her head, but the tickets had been so expensive. She'd be making instalments for years. "Flo's right," Lily said. "Whatever you want to eat!" Mary snorted, locked eyes with Flo, then Remus, and then she and Flo erupted into giggles. Really, for the love of Christ, did everything have to circle back to sex with those three!? Lily was no prude, but really, enough was enough! "Mary!" Remus admonished, but he couldn't quite hide his smile behind his hand or contain his snickers. Traitor! Brutus, indeed! "Anything?" James asked, shooting Lily a suggestive look that did absolutely nothing to her insides. Nothing. From the corner of her eye, Lily saw Sev scowl. Fortunately, James' eyes didn't linger, and he spared Lily from spluttering a response. "Mary, I'm going to need you to pop that arse and trust me, alright? Put your arms out, like this." James held his arms out straight to the side. When Mary copied him, he reached up and gripped her by her upper arms, lifted her straight over his head, and sat her safely back on the ground. "We did it!" "Holy…" Flo looked at James, wide-eyed, and elbowed Lily. "Let him!" she whispered fiercely. "Whoa," Mary exhaled, smiling widely. "You...Lillian! Let the man have what he wants!" Lily couldn't help but agree with their sentiments: holy whoa, indeed. Mary wasn't a small girl—she was curvy and muscular and taller than Lily—but James had lifted her like she was nothing. Flo's nudge sent heat rushing to Lily's face as she realised she was staring and that her mouth—oh no—was open. Fuck. She closed it with a click and rolled her eyes, pushing down the whole-body fluttering she felt. "I meant something we can buy at a restaurant," she clarified curtly. "I mean, it's London, you can buy pretty much anythi-" "Remus John!" Remus only grinned at her and tucked his hands into his trouser pockets, looking entirely unbothered. She needed a new way to scold him. Maybe a stick or a rolled-up newspaper would be better suited. One good swat on his nose should set him straight, the menace.

Read Chapter 18 or Start at Chapter One

From the "Black Magic Lovers" chat with Flo (Pink), Mary (Yellow), and James (Red).

Read Chapter 14 or Start at Chapter One

"Mmm alright, maybe the bar is a little higher than that," Lily admitted as they returned to the table Remus and Sev had found. "Ohhh are we talking about Lily's type!?" Mary exclaimed, clearly possessing ears like a bat if she'd overheard their conversation in this atmosphere. "Let's see..." "Blond," Remus immediately quipped, earning him a dark look from Lily as he confirmed James' theory. "Athletic!" Mary added excitedly. "Curly hair," Remus continued even as his drink was withheld. "Dimples!" Flo cried, reaching over to poke James in the cheek as he passed out drinks. He grinned, couldn't help it, and she squealed as his dimples appeared. "A cute bum," Alice said after she had received her martini from Lily. "Ta, Lily dear. You and I are both weak for a juicy peach." "Intelligence," was Sev's contribution, with a pointed look at James. "Oh, but she does like to be the smart one, Sev!" Mary protested. "She is more than smart enough to be the smart one even in a relationship with a smart man," Sev retorted. "She doesn't date idiots." "Hmmm, oh, right, thighs thicker than hers," Remus said with a pointed look down at James' football-fit quads. "Alright, alright! You've had your fun, hush!" Lily interrupted just as "Tall but not Remus-tall" spilled from Mary's lips. Lily begrudgingly handed Remus his drink and crossed her arms over her chest. James did his gentlemanly best to not outwardly notice how the position of her arms inadvertently pushed her boobs up. Unlike Mary when he first met her, James suspected this was not a show to invite the male gaze. "I hadn't realised you were all such experts on my likes and dislikes!" "How did this even come up, hmm?" Flo asked, snuggling against Mary's side. Mary wrapped her arm around the petite blonde. "James checks most of her boxes," he heard her whisper to Mary. "Except the blond..." "She needs to let him check her box," Mary agreed, giggling quietly but obviously as her shoulders trembled. James tried very hard to not outwardly react to their words either. Mary and Flo were both whispering about him hooking up with Lily! And most of the things her friends said she liked were things that applied to James. Except the blond. But maybe that was less of a problem if James had the approval of all of her friends. Except Sev. James would never have Sev's approval. He could tell just from the way that Sev had noticed the press of Lily's breasts against her arm, quietly eyeing them as he sipped his drink. His dark eyes made it tricky to notice just where he was staring, but James was on edge for people ogling Lily tonight. Lily sighed and uncrossed her arms to reach for her own drink. "We ran into Dirk Cresswell," she told them. "Dirk 'Pop Can' Cresswell?" Mary asked, her brows raised. James' brows went up too. Was that a reference to the size of his dick? Because… ow? Also holy Dr Pepper. He'd participated in many a dick-measuring contest at Durmstrang (always won handily by Sirius whether they were counting flaccid or hard) and never once seen anyone who he'd describe as a pop can. "Dicky-Dirk!" Flo laughed. "He's here? It's been so long!" "I- it wasn't- ugh. That was a rumour that was so untrue!" Yup, dick size reference. James actually caught Sev's eye for a moment, and for just that half second of connection, James knew they were in perfect agreement: they'd rather not hear about any dick that had been anywhere near Lily. "Pity that," Remus tutted, turning his attention back to the table from where he'd been scanning the crowd. "I was looking forward to finding out for myself... "Remus John!" "Oh here she goes," Mary warned, elbowing James. "James, bab, never tell her your middle name: she'll remember it for life and deploy it like a weapon!"

Read Chapter 23 or Start at Chapter One

Holy fuck. Holy fucking hell. How was Sirius supposed to think about anything else when Moony was in possession of a dildo the same size as Sirius' own dick? He excused himself quickly for the bathroom, locking himself in a stall and grabbing at his cock. Shit. Okay. Okay. He needed to calm down. Nothing was going to happen right now. He wasn't about to pull himself off in a restaurant loo. Deep breath. Adjust. Flush the toilet and go to wash his hands and shit, his face was pink. Sirius turned the taps as cold as they'd go and wiped his face, hoping Bellatrix wouldn't ask questions if she saw a bit of dampness still clinging to his skin. He'd go out to a club tonight. Find some ridiculously tall bloke and bend him over a sink. No. Shit. No he wouldn't. Because Moony was going to be at home. Bending over a sink himself. Fucking himself on a dildo Sirius told him to pretend was his own. Next time. Was it next time?

A special side-fic is coming out on Feb 17 as the introduction to the series that will contain Did You Miss Me? as well as other additional stories that didn't quite fit in the main fic.

Read Chapter 29 or Start at Chapter 1

(Spicy 18+ excerpt today ;))

Padfoot knew exactly what he was fucking doing, he had to, had to know what this was doing to him, the sublime, horrible, beautiful, disastrous thing that was happening to Remus. It had been less than five minutes and he was sweating and panting like he'd been teased for hours, but he was getting used to it, the weird shave and a haircut, five bob pattern, in the way one gets used to a massage chair or a hot towel on the face: too much, too pleasurable, and then just nice. Good. And then he came. It took him completely by surprise. The rhythmic beat suddenly turned into a solid, long, powerful vibration that he would swear he felt in his fucking teeth. His entire body tensed, drawn tight like a coil, curved in on itself and his orgasm hit him (literally, hit him in the chest) like a sack of bricks, and about as disorienting. His vision whited out and Remus choked on his breath, gasping for more air as he came because he couldn't catch his breath, couldn't think, couldn't even reach out his hand to stop the thick ropes from sinking into the carpet. "Oh fuck," he wheezed, his body twitching and starting to hurt when the buzzing didn't let up. He liked the oversensitivity, normally, if it was someone actually fucking him, but this was absolutely too much.

Chapter 30 is coming ~7 AM EST March 2nd!

You're not far off! Here's our faceclaim for Flo. :)

(@kayleemoonkitty on Instagram)