#fishwolf

Chapter 4: Boop

"Cutie, you can’t possibly believe a Lemurian and a werewolf will get along. Be for real."

Before I could response to Rafayel’s ridiculous statement, Xavier piped up from where he was walking behind me. "You don’t get along with anyone besides her…" He pointed one long finger at me then rolled his eyes. "And that’s only because you want to get in her pants."

Rafayel stopped walking so abruptly that I bumped into his broad back and stumbled backwards into Xavier, who caught my body against his chest and righted me with a mischievous grin on his face.

Before he could say a word though Rafayel spun around, face burning like his Evol had set fire to his cheeks, eyes wide, mouth hanging open in pure betrayal. "XAVIER!" he shrieked, voice cracking slightly. "I do NOT want in her pants—ugh—I mean I want to—I do." His eyes widened when he realized what he had said then he blurted out. "I mean, I—she’s my best friend and bodyguard and—and you’re just jealous because she likes me more than you!"

He crossed his arms dramatically, puffing out his chest like a disgruntled pufferfish then he glanced at me and immediately deflated into a pouty mess. "What if he gives me rabies?"

"Rabies?!" I repeated, raising an eyebrow.

Xavier chuckled and Rafayel instantly stiffened like he’d been electrocuted. "Yeah! Rabies!" Rafayel snapped, voice pitching slightly higher. "Werewolves get rabies! It’s science!"

I blinked. "Since when?"

"Since… since forever!" He threw his hands up dramatically. "And not only that… they’re hairy and stinky and wolfy and probably drool in their sleep!"

I tilted my head to the side as I thought about how Valko smelled. Deep pine forests after the rain, warm musk laced with that ridiculously expensive cologne he always wore—the kind that tended to make women want to bury their face in a man’s neck and inhale.

It was clean, earthy… unfairly attractive.

"He’s only hairy during the full moon and he doesn’t stink, he smells good. Like pine and musk." I paused for a moment, a grin creeping across my face when I saw Valko turn the corner up ahead and make his way towards us. "Not sure about the drooling though. You’ll have to ask him if you really want to know."

Rafayel’s face twisted into pure horror, like I’d just suggested he voluntarily sniff a garbage dump. "You like how he smells?!" His voice cracked again, high-pitched and wounded. "He probably reeks of… of wild animal! Like a wet dog after a storm! And musk and—and pine needles?! That doesn’t smell good, that’s—"

He cut himself off and shuddered dramatically, clutching at his chest as if physically pained then his eyes narrowed with sudden suspicion when Xavier started laughing hysterically. "He’s behind me, isn’t he?" he murmured miserably.

"Yup," I grinned then turned to Valko who was standing behind him dressed in dark jeans tucked into boots and a dark red Henley. There was an amused look on his handsome face that made me snort because I knew whatever happened next was going to be highly entertaining.

Rafayel froze like a startled seahorse, his purple eyes going wide as saucers. He didn’t move. I don’t even think he was breathing. His mouth opened and closed a few times as he stared blankly ahead like not looking at the werewolf would make him disappear.

Valko didn’t say a word as he moved until he was standing directly behind the Lemurian. He leaned down slowly, that infuriatingly handsome face breaking into a lazy smirk as he inhaled deeply near Rafayel’s shoulder.

A beat of silence then… "Woof."

Rafayel screamed. Not a small, dignified yelp. No. A full-on, high-pitched shriek that startled the birds off the cafe’s awning and made several customers drop their silverware and turn to look at us. He whipped around so fast he nearly tripped over his own feet, only saved by Valko’s hand snapping out to grab his elbow before he face-planted into the pavement.

Now they were nose-to-nose: Rafayel trembling like a jellyfish in a storm surge, cheeks blazing pink as he stared up at the taller man; Valko towering over him with that stupidly perfect smirk still glued to his face.

"Did you just… woof at me?!" Rafayel sputtered, sounding scandalized.

Valko’s smirk only widened, golden eyes glinting with pure, unrepentant mischief. He didn’t let go of Rafayel’s elbow; he tightened his grip just enough to keep the flailing merman upright then… he did it again. Loud. Clear. Deliberate.

"WOOF."

Rafayel made a noise that wasn't even human, a squeaky gasp followed by an incoherent flail of limbs as he tried and failed to yank himself free from Valko's hold. "Kenzie, get your wolf!" he shrieked, voice so high it nearly hit ultrasonic levels.

I burst out laughing… full, unfiltered cackling. You know the kind that makes your stomach hurt and tears prick the corners of your eyes? Yeah, that kind of laughing.

Xavier doubled over beside me, slapping his knee while Valko stood there like a smug mountain of werewolf dominance. He bent down and pressed his nose to Rafayel’s temple and inhaled deeply. "You smell like burnt toast and anxiety."

Rafayel’s body stiffened like he’d been doused in ice water. "BURNT TOAST?! I’ll have you know I happen to smell delicious, you—you overgrown furball." He finally wrenched his arm free and immediately spun around to hide behind me. "Kenzie," he whispered, clutching the back of my jacket like a scared child hiding from a monster under the bed. "Your wolf is bullying me."

Valko chuckled while Xavier let out a snort and started laughing all over again.

"Valko," I said through my giggles, "please don't terrorize my fishie."

Rafayel gasped like the nickname offended him, his face flushing an even deeper pink as he muttered, "Really, cutie? Fishie?"

Valko raised an eyebrow then he took a few steps forward until he was standing in front of us. Rafayel immediately ducked further behind my shoulder like I could somehow absorb him into my body for protection then stiffened when Valko reached over my shoulder and booped him on the nose. "Nice to meet you, fishie. And to answer your question… I don’t drool in my sleep. There’s a good chance I might snore though."

Rafayel stood frozen, wide-eyed and breathless, like his brain had short-circuited. He didn’t blink. Didn’t speak. Just… stared at Valko with pure existential confusion, as if trying to compute whether this was real or some cruel hallucination caused by heatstroke.

Then… his eyes flicked down and he went cross eyed trying to stare at his nose where Valko had touched him. When that didn’t work, he whimpered and touched the area gently with two trembling fingers. "I’ve been… booped."

Xavier leaned in and whispered, "Oh no. I think the wolf broke him."

The silence stretched. A full, agonizing five seconds where I could almost see Rafayel’s soul visibly leave his body. His fingers still rested on the tip of his nose. His lips parted. Then closed. Then opened but no sound came out as he raised his eyes to meet Valko’s golden ones.

Xavier leaned closer, squinting like he was observing a rare species of malfunctioning fish and asked, "Should we pinch him to make sure this isn’t a dream?"

Then Rafayel blinked once… twice… and turned to me. "Kenzie… he booped me."

I pressed a hand to my mouth, shoulders shaking as I tried to control my laughter. Once I had gotten ahold of myself, I cleared my throat and answered him. "Yes," I said solemnly, nodding. "He booped you so that makes you friends now. It’s official."

Rafayel’s lower lip trembled like a newborn seal pup. "Friends?" he repeated, voice cracking on the word like it physically pained him. "But… but I don’t want to be friends with your wolf! He called me burnt toast and—and…" He trailed off and gestured at his nose so wildly he almost smacked himself in the face. "He booped me—like I’m some kind of pet!"

Valko didn’t even try to hide his amusement. He crossed his arms, the red material of his shirt stretching across toned muscles as he tilted his head and quietly watched the fishie meltdown.

Rafayel ignored him and suddenly spun, pointing an accusing finger at Xavier. "And you!" he screeched. "You're enjoying this! This is cruelty! Emotional abuse! Friend abuse! First, you accuse me of wanting in Kenzie’s pants and now you… you just stood there while I got booped!"

Xavier didn't even try to hide it; he was grinning ear-to-ear like Christmas had come early. He wiped an imaginary tear from his eye and said, "Oh come on Rafayel, it was kinda funny! You looked like a startled goldfish."

Rafayel gasped and pressed a hand to his chest. "Goldfish?! I am not… you can't just compare me to a common aquarium fish!" His voice rose several octaves in outrage. "I am a Lemurian! A beautiful Lemurian. That’s a hundred times better than a simple goldfish!!"

Looking way too entertained by this whole scene, Valko took one slow, deliberate step forward then another. Rafayel squeaked and instinctively backed up until his heels hit the wall. The werewolf loomed over him, all six-foot-two of broad-shouldered hotness and smug golden eyes that glinted like firelight. He didn’t say a word. Just… stared.

Rafayel’s breath hitched and I thought for sure he was about to pass out but then he raised his chin and stubbornly met Valko’s gaze. "What do you want, puppy?"

Valko snorted and reached out, cupping both hands around Rafayel’s face and squished his cheeks together like he was some kind of adorable stuffed animal and mumbled, "World's Most Dramatic Fishie."

"Mmmph! Mmm-MMM!" Rafayel tried to protest through the cheek-squish, but it came out sounding like muffled dolphin noises.

Xavier lost it. Full-on collapsed against me, wheezing with laughter while tears streamed down his face. "Oh my god," he gasped between breaths, "… I can’t breathe!"

I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt, clutching Xavier for support as we nearly slid to the ground in hysterics. Valko looked utterly delighted for a moment then he dropped his hands and took a step back. "So… who’s hungry?"

Rafayel immediately straightened, reaching up with both hands and rubbing his cheeks like a disgruntled prince who’d just been manhandled by a peasant. His hair was slightly messy and one of the purple strands stuck up adorably at the front. "Food?" he repeated. "How can you talk about—" His stomach growled loud enough to echo off the café walls.

Everyone froze.

Xavier wiped tears from his eyes and whispered, "The fishie is starving."

Rafayel turned scarlet again, but this time it wasn’t about boops or werewolves. It was pure hunger-induced shame. He folded his arms tightly across his chest like that could hide the betrayal of his own digestive system and glared at all three of us.

Valko’s smirk returned full force, and he jerked his thumb toward the café. "I’ll buy."

Rafayel’s glare melted away instantly, his stomach betraying him again with another loud gurgle. He cleared his throat and tried to play it cool, flipping a strand of purple hair off his forehead like he wasn’t completely swayed by the offer of free food. "Well…" he drawled, trying to sound indifferent. "If you're offering… I suppose I could grace your table with my presence."

Xavier snorted. "Wow. Such generosity from His Highness."

Ignoring him completely, Rafayel marched toward the café door with his head held high then pushed the door open with far more drama than necessary, almost like he was entering a royal banquet instead of a cozy café.

Valko snorted as the Lemurian disappeared inside then followed without missing a beat. Xavier and I exchanged amused glances before trailing behind them.

The café was warm and smelled of freshly baked bread, coffee beans, and something sweet… maybe cinnamon rolls? A few customers glanced over at our group, some looking amused by Rafayel’s earlier antics while others went back to eating or conversing with their companions.

Rafayel slid into a booth near the window and immediately snatched up a menu like it required intense study. His nose scrunched slightly as he scanned it… then un-scrunched when something caught his interest.

Valko slid into the booth beside him, ignoring Rafayel’s side eye and scowl, stretching his long arms over the back of the seat and tapping his fingers near Rafayel’s shoulder to annoy him. Xavier plopped down next to me, grinning at the display between the werewolf and the Lemurian.

I leaned forward slightly and peeked at Rafayel’s menu. "See anything good?"

He didn’t answer right away, too busy glaring at the man beside him then he turned back to the menu and sucked in a sharp breath. "They have seafood pasta," he whispered.

Xavier blinked as Valko’s expression lit up. "Oh boy."

The werewolf tilted his head to the side and mumbled, "You’re a fishie. Should you be eating your ancestors?"

Rafayel’s head whipped up so fast I was surprised it didn’t pop off and go flying across the room. His purple eyes narrowed into dangerous slits, lips curling back from his lips with a growl. "Excuse me?!" he hissed, voice dripping with offense. "I’m a merman! I’m not a shrimp or a mussel or even a crab or lobster! A merman! Big difference!"

Valko just kept smirking, golden eyes glinting like he absolutely loved getting under Rafayel’s skin. Xavier snorted into his menu while I covered my mouth to hide my grin.

Rafayel slammed the menu down dramatically and pointed at Valko. "You eat cows! And pigs! And chickens that probably all had names before you turned them into bacon!"

Valko shrugged lazily, not even bothering to correct Rafayel’s mistake. "Yeah… but they weren't related to me."

"WELL THESE FISH WEREN'T RELATED TO ME EITHER!" Rafayel screeched loud enough that several customers turned their heads again. The elderly woman at the next table gasped softly and whispered something about 'poor boy having a breakdown.'

"But you are a fish," Valko said simply, like it was the most obvious fact in the world.

Rafayel looked genuinely horrified. "I—WHAT? No! That’s—that’s species-ist!" He turned to me desperately, reaching out and grabbing my hand. "Kenzie. Tell him I’m not a fish."

I bit my lip and shrugged innocently. "You kinda are though, right? … you’re Lemurian."

Rafayel gasped like I'd just stabbed him with a fork instead of speaking facts. Xavier couldn't take it anymore and burst out laughing again while Valko reached over and poked Rafayel's cheek with one finger. "Fishie."

Rafayel recoiled so hard he nearly fell off the booth seat before catching himself at the last second. "Stop poking me!" he snapped, swatting Valko's hand away like an annoyed cat.

Valko just grinned like this was the most fun he’d had in months and did it again. Poked Rafayel’s cheek. Right in the same spot.

The Lemurian let out a noise that was half-growl, half-whimper and slapped Valko’s hand away harder this time, then started smacking his arm like an angry toddler whiling growling and muttering under his breath about ‘swatting Valko on the butt with a newspaper.’

Xavier lost his mind all over again, burying his face in my shoulder to muffle his cackles while I watched the absolute absurdity of a 6’2” werewolf get repeatedly swatted by a small purple-haired artist with wide eyes and a grin on my face.

Valko didn’t seem offended at all though. If anything? He looked amused. Like Rafayel was some kind of weirdly cute pet who needed to be teased constantly just to see how far they could go before exploding. He leaned back casually against the booth seat… lifted both hands like he was offering his surrender then reached out and poked Rafayel right between the eyebrows with two fingers… boop-boop.

The entire table froze for half a second as Rafayel sat there blinking rapidly, brain short-circuiting from dual-target booping assault tactics no one saw coming. His wide purple eyes flickered over Valko’s smug face like he was trying to comprehend what had just happened.

Then he blinked and his eyes narrowed before he grinned mischievously. "Wolfie." He raised a hand and mimicked Valko. Boop-boop. Right on Valko’s nose with two fingers—quick, precise, deliberate. Like an official declaration of war via booping rights revoked then immediately reclaimed by the superior fishie.

Valko’s golden eyes widened slightly, just a flicker of genuine surprise crossing his usually unshakable expression. Then… the corner of his mouth twitched. And it spread. Into the biggest, dumbest, most delighted grin I’d ever seen on my normally composed werewolf friends face.

"Oh no," Xavier gasped. "He's smiling."

Valko was beaming. Like a golden retriever who just got told ‘good boy’ for the first time.

The café seemed to pause around us, even the clinking of dishes and quiet chatter dimming into background noise as everyone subtly noticed how happy the massive werewolf looked after getting booped on the nose by a tiny purple-haired merman.

Then Valko did something no one expected. Not Xavier, not me… not Rafayel. He leaned forward slowly until their faces were inches apart and booped him back. Right on his forehead this time. Softly.

Rafayel’s breath hitched audibly—a little squeak escaping before he could stop it—and his entire face lit up like fireworks had gone off inside him. His cheeks turned an impossible shade of pink, ears burning crimson at their tips while those wide purple eyes stared into Valko’s gold ones without blinking or looking away. Then the Lemurian laughed.

The sound was unexpected—light, musical, and utterly disarming. It tinkled through the café like wind chimes on a summer day, his whole face softening into something radiant and unexpectedly beautiful.

Valko’s eyes softened in a way I’d never seen, like he'd just discovered something precious.

Rafayel leaned forward and poked Valko in the chest. Then on the nose again. Then immediately after once more right between the eyebrows with playful precision.

Xavier looked like he might pass out from sheer emotional overload while I bit my lip to keep from squealing at how ridiculously cute this entire exchange was becoming: two grown men engaged in a booping fest with the intensity of toddlers playing tag for first time at daycare.

Valko didn't react with words or teasing this time, he grinned wider than ever before… then slowly raised both hands like he was surrendering completely to whatever magic Rafayel had accidentally unleashed upon him. "You win, beautiful."

Xavier leaned towards me and whispered under his breath, "Wait… are they flirting?"

I didn’t answer because my heart was suddenly doing backflips in my chest. Because yes.   They absolutely were flirting. In the most bizarre, unexpected way possible: a series of gentle boops and soft smiles exchanged like secret messages only they understood. Valko looked at Rafayel like he was the first sunrise after an endless winter—wonderstruck and utterly smitten.

I grinned and leaned forward, resting my chin on my hand as I watched them.

Mission accomplished.

Chapter 5: Winner... Sucks? (Part 1)