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Im gonna baste you with butter and garlic, then roll you in chopped up peppers, lightly bread, deep fry, and then dress you up like a train conductor and position you inside of a human sized dollhouse acting like you are about to microwave a steak
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You know, It occurs to me that I know more about what many other people look like than i do about the inside of my own colon. Maybe its time for an exploratory journey.
Did you guys ever try that thing back after high school where you take a live eel and use it as a loofa on your dick until it learns to wiggle in time with your movement to create the least discomfort for itself, and then you deep fry it and serve it to the wierd guy who lives at the corner of your cul-de-sac as revenge for when he stole your scooter?
How to summon the Fishlord
Carve gills into the jaw of a mummified Guinea pig, then dowse in saltwater and add two teaspoons of vodka. Burn a five hundred dollar bill folded into the shape of a trout whilst chanting “nightingale, nightengale, nightengale" and pouring three thumbtacks-worth of butterfly stomach acid over your head. Sing in Spanish about your favourite kind of salad. Burp thrice toward the southeast before chanting the words to Good King Wenceslas backwards, and your Fishlord should show itself by means of an old cabbage or possibly the nearest ATM.
