#fijichallenge

From the start of October to end of November. No huge changes, but it’s nice to see something! 😊 #jsam #fijichallenge #cfd https://www.instagram.com/p/BqnqxJVBE85MG0cW79u00d_r4ijOYUJlrIto7s0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1r9s6sc5j3f1d

NSV!!! (Meant to post this yesterday but didn’t have the energy haha) I RAN 5K!!!! How? No idea! The run started off bad - think I was still stiff from Saturday night - so 3K itself felt like it was going to be a stretch. But somehow I kept going - determines to prove I could do 4K which surely I could after Saturday?? 4K turned out further than I had originally thought it would be - forcing me to run past a part in my route I had planned to always stop at - a bridge far too small and busy with pedestrians and bikes to warrant running over. But I couldn’t stop, I hadn’t reached 4K yet! I stuck to the edge of the bike lane to avoid the people and I kept running. Then I hit 4K and it occurred to me next time I ran I could hit 5k - I mean my blisters hurt, my legs were achy and I had little speed, but 1 more km wasn’t that much more to add on. So why didn’t I keep going? After all I’d felt this pain for most of the last 1K - the blisters later that evening would be dulled by the amazingness of the accomplishment surely?! So I kept going. 1km was further than I thought it be and at points I was begging for the little Fitbit voice to tell me I’d reached 5k, but sheer determination to do it kept me going - I even sprinted the last bit to the end of the road out of pure pride at the achievement! Run 5Km by Christmas? Done! ✅🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌 #jsam #fijichallenge #jamessmithacademy #5km https://www.instagram.com/p/BqHI51Hh--LzCj3jOIMtU4csS0P5K2UUWws9Bk0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1aaa404kpuvvf

So I made the mistake of going home this weekend. I knew that would mean no workouts, I knew that was VERY likely to mean I binged and ate every treat always in the kitchen cupboards. And guess what? I did 😩 I’m annoyed at myself, but trying not to hate myself too hard. I have this self sabotage loop I really need to break and stop just lying down for the inevitable to happen and take some action instead. But I will try to treat myself with love and understanding to conquer this not the slap and angry talking to I really want to do right now. And maybe that’s more important progress than actually losing the weight?? #tryingtobekind #mentalhealth #cfd #fijichallenge #jsam (at Sedbergh) https://www.instagram.com/p/BpwD-QTh9PQKEsKDK1jy93IgVv8DgGrkX2MaSM0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1wi9gnv9hcrh1

So, the inevitable happened this morning. Gained 2 pounds (not too bad actually I think!) and gained back on all measurements except my hips (which weirdly have gone down??) - meaning my overall cm loss progress has been gained back and then some. It’s a blow, but something I knew was going to happen after a long few days of depression and eating to cope. Just under a month till I want to feel a bit more confident in a dress, strict cfd now and I might just seem some progress! #nohalloweencandyforme #fijichallenge #cfd #jsam https://www.instagram.com/p/BpbnMVxhb0Poyi4bMA1c3Lc5SbVvfSTXrBraeM0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=yzh6wjs7cpxu

Looks slightly more photogenic than my brunch did! 😋 #saladicaneat #wantittomorrowtoo #butimoutoftuna #cfd #fijichallenge #jsam https://www.instagram.com/p/BpW7_2lB9_-RWnwIQxZXG2vHHyp6zVPoNEiLWE0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1vmkfyrkjgjyn

I hate salad. But I loved this 😋 #jsam #fijichallenge #jamessmithacademy #cfd https://www.instagram.com/p/BpUh-lxho696NXawjdejUNr3-OsT3H6xEUfXaM0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1tc427hgmyxzo

Lunch as I wasn’t home last night make my self something... So expensive and now I’ll be drinking protein shakes all night to try to reach my protein goal 🤦‍♀️🤣 #jsam #fijichallenge #cfd https://www.instagram.com/p/BpOyrM7B1rHBe3NfethCh2Tdi-m6Ix5Td9vFrQ0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=md5kc9aadexz

CFD could not have been further from the truth this weekend. Yesterday I thought about trying but didn’t manage it. I hated myself last night when I lay awake. This morning I’m a little less sleep deprived and ready to kick my ass back into gear. I’m doing this for me, no one else, and sometimes that makes it harder to find ‘motivation’, but it is also sometimes where the strongest motivator comes from. 2 weeks down. I’ve been up and I’ve been down in measurements and scales. Got 10 more weeks to keep a positive looking trend and hopefully a positive mindset too! #jsam #fijichallenge #jamessmithacademy #cfd https://www.instagram.com/p/BpOi7O5BLlGT5B-6bl39ImI8I5DdZpRo1GDnAY0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1qmlbl8o1jj71