#ff:city lights

lights out series | joshua hong, yoon jeonghan (M)

✮pairings: joshua hong x female reader x yoon jeonghan ✮ genre: angst, fluff, smut [18+] ✮ aus: rockstar joshua, theatre director jeonghan, polyamory ✮ word count: 172k – ongoing ✮ read here

guilty pleasures | boo seungkwan (M)

✾ pairings: boo seungkwan x female reader ✾ genre: fluff, smut ✾ au: theatre performer seungkwan, childhood crush to lovers ✾ word count: 40.5k ✾ read here

wicked games | kim mingyu, jeon wonwoo (M)

navigation post part i | insomnia The last bit of sanity in your mind vanished the moment before you asked your hot neighbour to be your fuck buddy. Whatever prompted you to muster the courage to get the words out was something you didn't know you had inside you. But he wasn't saying no.

part ii | reverie Joshua Hong was many things aside from your hot neighbour—he was a menace, a relentless tease. But most importantly, he was the first guy to ever make you feel wanted. And you were yet to know how dangerous that was.

part iii | pillow talk Deep down, you knew you were growing an attachment to... whatever this was. Joshua was not intoxicating, you were wrong about that, he was addictive.

part iv | lunacy You could no longer hide your infatuation over Joshua Hong. It was becoming painfully obvious, though you weren't sure to what extent he was aware of this. Or if he even cared, for that matter.

part v | stargazing Joshua should've known the minute he saw you standing outside his door for the first time. Then, maybe he would've gotten the opportunity to make things right with you. But no, he let his hedonistic ways get in the way first. Now, will he get the opportunity to make things right with you?

part vi | blue hour If there was a guideline to how to be a fuckbuddy, you were sure you had already broke every rule in the book. It was ridiculous at this point, and you were so sure that Joshua might be catching all of your signs already, because you couldn't be more obvious. But oh, Joshua is only but a man.

part vii | lullaby For months, you've been hiding how you really felt about your fuckbuddy and the remorse for deceiving him can be sickening. For both of you.

part viii | after dark It all started with a deal with your next door neighbor, Joshua Hong. A little harmless deal that surprisingly led you to finding love; and a part of yourself that you were still discovering.

part viii | after dark pt. ii

side chapter | 3:14 AM

part ix | badsleeper › finale For as long as you've been with Joshua, you've always had this... fantasy. And your boyfriend isn't one to not let you indulge.

✮ warnings: alcohol consumption (no dubcon), smut with plot, obnoxiously long sex scene, hard dom joshua, brat reader, reader is on the pill, foul language, dirty talk, unprotected p in v sex, creampie, messy cumplay, body worshipping, jealousy, oral sex (m, f), multiple orgasms, manhandling, a bit of degradation kink, brat taming: pussy slaps, overstimming and crymaxing; aftercare, pet names: sweetheart, princess, baby, bunny (hers) handsome, baby, babe, baby boy (his)

✮ this is loosely proofread, i could've waited patiently for the brilliant @cvntrlseecvntrlvee to proofread this for me but i am, you guess it, impatient. haha sorry my sweet vee. i love u 🩵

✮ this chapter is for @beckyloveshannie, happy birthday, baby 🩵🥰

✮ a/n: the obnoxiously long sex scene is for me. it's a self indulgent thing, i won't apologize for how fucking long it is. you suffer with me kekekekek

✮ a/n 2: also, stick around for the announcement in the final author's note!! •⩊•

✮ disclaimer: minors dni this post is intended for 18+ readers ONLY. please have your age stated in your description and try not to look like a bot please 🙂.

part viii — part two

The flight that was supposed to be short ended up extending over two hours in the air because of a weather issue. By the time you reached the airport you felt exhausted, both physically and emotionally.

You felt like you had failed the main purpose of going to visit Joshua. Which, in reality, wasn't your sole intention of visiting him. Mainly, you just missed him so bad it made your heart ache. The second intention was to try and make him clear his schedule for your book release party.

However Joshua couldn't do that. He didn't say why, he just said he was not going to be able to attend.

You tried to see reason within that. Joshua was extremely busy these days, recording session after recording session, meetings, networking, shows, you name it.

But, he said in the past that he wanted to be there with you on the day of the release. And you couldn't help but think that there was no way that he changed his mind in the span of a few weeks. Was recording more important than his words to you?

Again, you tried to give Joshua the benefit of the doubt.

Among all of the people coming and going in the vast space of the airport, you spotted a black haired man, wearing a bright pink sweatshirt, pacing back and forth before deciding to sit down on a bench, phone in hand, the screen so bright it illuminated his whole face.

"Mr. Yoon?" you called faking an overtly sweet voice.

He winced at the sound in surprise and lifted his brown eyes to you. "Oh, grandmaaa," he chuckled, standing up to wrap you in an asphyxiating hug, bringing a hand to your head, running his knuckles on your scalp.

"Jeonghan, stop it," you whined.

"I've been calling you, ever heard of picking up the phone when it rings?" he muttered through gritted teeth, pulling away from you almost aggressively.

"I just landed, Jeonghan. I didn't take my phone off airplane mode," you muttered with some annoyance but couldn't fight the smile that crept on your face when you saw his. "Stop it with the grandma thing."

"Don't tell me what to do," he scoffed, putting a hand on the crown of your head to ruffle your hair. "Come on, hurry, or your present's gonna die from suffocation in the car," he added with a low chuckle.

"My what?" you gasped but he immediately turned to the direction of the sliding doors of the airport. "Jeonghan!"

You had to hop quicker to catch his step. "You know for someone who's recently recovering from an ankle injury, you sure are fast," you said with a tired gasp.

"I'm not fast, you're slow," he muttered, turning to give you a look. "It comes with old age."

"Can you stop with that?!" you whined and felt more irritated when he just snorted with a laugh. "I'm younger than you."

"You might be on paper, but not in spirit," he lifted his pointer finger as if lecturing. "Did you tell your boyfriend you arrived safe?"

Your heart skipped. "Oh, I forgot," you muttered and got your phone from your tote bag.

"It's affecting your memory now," he tutted, getting the key to his black BMW M3 and unlocked the door for you, opening before stating: "And please don't sit on your gift."

"Oh, what is it?" you peaked inside the car before climbing into it. There was a large paper bag on the passenger seat. "Is it this?"

You lifted the paper bag with some reluctance as you slid onto the seat. Before you could turn around and look at Jeonghan, he was already closing the door to his car and going around it.

"Very funny," you muttered with a scoff, opening the bag to receive the smell of fries. "You said my gift was alive."

"I mean it had to be alive at some point," he pointed with a shrug.

"I thought I was going to find a pet or something like that," you muttered. "I hate your pranks."

"If you want that, I can get you a bunny," he nodded at you "Or a goldfish, so it doesn't run away."

"Someone hasn't watched Finding Nemo," you said in a mocking singsong tone.

"Pretty sure that's a clownfish, you clown," he let out a chortle and pointed at the bag with his nose. "I got you your burger."

"Oh! Thank you, Jeongjeong," you cooed happily, grabbing a fry but before you could stuff it in your mouth, it was quickly snatched away by his lithe fingers. "Hey!"

He cackled, chewing the stolen fry as his devious laugh filled your ears. "Put your seatbelt on," he started the car and immediately drove off the parking lot and into the road.

The click from the seatbelt resounded between the two of you, since you were busy munching on fries.

"I assumed you'd be hungry" you heard Jeonghan say calmly now, he maintained his eyes on the road.

"Yeah, I am. Thank you Hannie. Want a fry?" you offered.

"Please," he sighed, leaning to your side as you put a fry in his mouth. "You should try the burger, it's really good."

You nodded, though he didn't catch that. His eyes didn't leave the road until he heard the rustling noise of the paper bag as you took the burger with your hands, unwrapping it to sink a bite in.

"But not in my car!" he protested loudly, sending quick looks at you.

"You smoke in my apartment, I'll eat in your car," you quipped and laughed when you saw his jaw nearly dislocate.

"Those two are not equivalent!" he said with a look of disbelief.

"I decide they are," you said matter of factly, showing him a slight smile as you munched on the burger.

"You little–" he cut himself off with a laugh but he settled back on his seat with a small: "Brat."

You froze for a second, getting an odd feeling. Like an unsettling chill crawling down your spine. But Jeonghan was back with his eyes set on the road, paying no mind to what your reaction was.

"Oh, I forgot to tell Joshua that I'm with you," you muttered, trying to mask the alarming jolt in your stomach.

"Did you ask him about next Friday?" he pried, when he looked at you his eyes drifted to the fry you were holding in front of your mouth.

Jeonghan parted his mouth as you stuffed the fry in his mouth.

"He said he won't be able to make it," you muttered, trying to mask the pain constricting the tone of your voice, but it was too late.

Your heart deflated.

"Mmn," he hummed with some understanding. "Did he say why?"

"Nope."

You finished typing the text and sent it to your boyfriend, locking your phone to concentrate on the big burger that looked huge in your hands.

"This is really big, Hannie," you muttered innocently before taking another bite with a pleased groan.

"Yeah, they all say that," he said with a brief chuckle.

You nearly choked on your food. "Jeonghan!" you squealed, making him laugh harder. "You're gross."

"As if you didn't know me already," he scoffed and you told on his need to change the subject when he grabbed his vape pen from the cup holder as he asked: "So how was it? Were you able to tell him what was bothering you?"

"Uh, yeah," you frowned. "About that."

"Fuck me," he groaned, his arms going slack but his hands were still gripping the wheel. "You didn't tell him?"

"I was... busy," you muttered shyly and looked away. "We talked about other things, but I never got around telling him about my... insecurities."

The car came to a stop in the parking lot of the building and Jeonghan turned the engine off, a hand immediately reaching inside the paper bag to grab some fries.

"And how do you feel now?" his eyebrows lifted slightly.

"I feel like crap," you let out a sigh, trying to mask all of your emotions but the weight was too much, making you drop your gaze to your lap. "And now he's not going to be here when I release my book and it makes me question whether I want a stupid party or not because I know I'll feel bummed."

"Why? No! I'm already scouting a place for the party," he shook his head, grabbing more fries.

Your heart sank a little. "You are doing what?" you asked with a tiny voice.

"I'm looking for a nice place where you can have your party," he shrugged. "I think I found something, but I'm negotiating with the owner so we can have an enclosed section of the restaurant."

"Jeonghan you shouldn't have!" you muttered, your tone quivering with emotion.

"I'm not doing it out of the goodness of my heart. It's your boyfriend's instruction," he looked around aimlessly. "He might not be there, but he is putting the black card."

"You're joking," you scoffed. "Tell me you're joking."

"My jokes are funny," he tutted. "This is not a joke."

"Jeonghan," you said firmly, your head tilting to one side.

"I'm being serious!" he smiled the way he did when he knew he was getting in trouble. "He wants you to have a nice party for your big day."

"A party he's not attending!" you whined and your eyes brimmed with tears almost instantly and you had to look away in shame.

"You're not doing this for your boyfriend, you know that," he reprimanded. "Now quit being a sorry ass and eat."

You pouted and looked at your burger.

"What?" Jeonghan chuckled at the sad expression on your face. "What, why are you doing that face? Please eat that or I will."

At that, you raised the burger and took another large bite, the tears that had gathered in the corner of your eyes ran down your cheeks.

Jeonghan threw you a reproachful look, but a slow and awkward smile drew on his face. "You're unbelievable," he snickered, bringing the vape and tucked it between his lips, drawing a big intake.

"And you're mean," you retorted. "You're not a good friend."

"Now you're just making shit up," he laughed.

"I am," you smiled sheepishly, taking another bite from your burger. "Mmnph this has bacon in it," you delighted with big tears in your eyes.

"Yes, princess, it has bacon in it," he muttered aloofly, unlocking his phone and typing something quick.

"How did you know I liked bacon?"

"Everyone likes bacon," he rolled his eyes and sent you a look again.l "You told me you liked bacon."

"I did?" you squeaked out, mouth full of food.

"You were drunk," he muttered, still looking at his phone.

"Mmn," you hummed, pausing for some thought. "I've been doing that quite a lot."

"What, forgetting things?" he raised his head. "Yeah, that's normal in old people like you."

"Jeonghan, no!" you whined in frustration. "I mean, getting drunk."

"Please," he brushed off. "You get drunk two weekends in a row and start getting worried. You should loosen up more, grandma."

"What do you mean?" you asked in a high-pitched whine.

"I mean... you read too much into things," he dropped his phone between his thighs. "Relax. Don't worry about meaningless things. Eat."

"Pfft," you laughed. "Wow, that's great advice, Jeonghan."

"Yeah, it's not my best one," he looked out the window, biting the tip of his thumb. "Listen, I just don't like to see you like this, okay?"

"How?" you inquired, thinking that he might list emotions he saw on your face. Sad, disappointed, deflated.

"Insecure," he replied with a tone of obviousness. "It makes you irrational. That's why you can't sleep. That's why you turn to alcohol."

You swallowed, uncertain as to how to proceed with this conversation. It seemed hard to believe that in such a short time, Jeonghan has learned how to read you perfectly.

"I'm working on it," you replied with a small pout.

"I know," he replied with a warmth coating his tone, the understanding mirroring in his gaze. "But you're not canceling this."

You breathed out through your nose while you munched on your food. The only sound you heard beside you was the raspy intake of Jeonghan's vape.

"God, I've so many things to do," you said, leaning your head back on the headrest. "I don't even know where to start."

"Do you need help?" he asked promptly. "I can help if I can."

"Thank you, Jeonghan but," you sighed with some frustration. "It's stuff only I can do."

"Let me keep you company, then," he said with a reassuring smile. "Unless you want to be alone and you're too shy to tell me."

You looked into his kind eyes for a second, but it was long enough to make you feel an exhilarating jolt deep in your gut. You looked again, feeling a bit flustered and nodded to him.

"Company is okay."

Jeonghan helped you carry one of the boxes full of freshly printed and packed books and you carried another. He looked excited as you both made your way up to your apartment.

"I haven't read your books yet," he commented, weighing the heavy box in his arms. "Makes me feel excited."

"Uhm," you choked out. "Yeah... about that."

"What?" he raised his eyes at you. The elevator came to a stop and you hurried yourself out and to your apartment door.

"You don't know what I write?" you asked as you opened the door and let your friend in, who looked avidly interested in your books upon seeing your reaction.

"Should I?" he asked curiously.

"Joshua didn't tell you?"

"He just told me that you're a writer, that's it," he cocked his head to one side. "Was he supposed to tell me?"

"No, not at all just," you breathed out, putting the box on the round dining table.

"Why don't you just cut to the point?" he asked, sounding a little annoyed now and with a low grunt, he placed the box on the table too. "That shit is heavy. For someone your size, you carried it like it was nothing."

"The difference between you and me, is that I go to the gym so I can sleep," you huffed, feigning some pride but your joke was broken by your own embarrassed laugh.

"Yeah, whatever, grandma," he nodded with a playful smile plastered on his face. "I've heard your knees crack everytime you get up, so shut up."

"You shut up!" you whined like a child.

"Tell me what your books are about," he retorted while pushing the sleeves of his pink hoodie up to his elbows.

"Vampires," you muttered, but your tone fell flat.

"Tsk. I know that," he said, making his way to the kitchen and freely opening the door of your fridge, pulling out a bottle of soju and a can, which he left one day he stopped by. To keep you company as well.

"Can I get one?" you asked, nodding to the bottle of soju.

Jeonghan stopped, his eyes zeroing on your face and nodded. "You got it," he muttered, deciding not to make a comment about your newer alcoholic tendencies.

You went to your study to get your pencil case, coming back to Jeonghan sitting down on the dining table, popping the can of beer open with eyes on his phone screen, that were dragged to your frame when you entered within his line of vision.

"Do you want to watch TV while I do this?" you offered meekly when his eyes darted down your frame swiftly.

"I was thinking of watching you do whatever it is you have to do," he shrugged, leaning back on the chair, knees spread wide.

"Uhm, okay," you replied, sitting on the chair next to him. "You're going to grow bored."

"That's what the booze is for," he replied, pouring some soju on the pair of glasses, and then poured a bit of beer. His fingers moved the glass in circle motions on top of the table and then lifted the glass to you. "Drink."

"Thank you, Hannie," you whispered, taking the glass and holding it for him to clink together.

"Cheers," he said before drinking up. "Now, about your book..."

"Ah," you nervously opened one of the boxes.

The cover was pretty. Prettier than you ever expected one of your books to look like. Even when you were up all night writing the book, you never got to imagine it would sport a jacket so pretty.

You got a permanent marker from your pencil case and opened the book, to swiftly scribble your author's signature, plus a dedication note that read:

To Jeongjeong. Thank you for being the greatest friend and blessing I never knew I needed.

You closed the book and slided it across the table to his hand.

"What?" he asked, completely clueless, opened the book and quickly read the signature. His bright, sweet eyes lit up as he looked at you. "Aw, princess, thank you."

He turned the page over, his eyes reading over the book dedication, the one that the world would see. Your heart dropped, knowing what his eyes were reading, his expression changed a bit but then he immediately closed it.

"So, tell me what this is about," he insisted, trying to change the subject. "Go on, I'm not gonna read it right now."

"The book is about vampires, magic. It has a lot of blood, drama... and sex," you cleared your throat shamefully and drank from your glass deeply. "A lot of it."

A moment dragged on, Jeonghan kept the features of his face in check, but then he broke with a wheezing laughter.

"Don't laugh at me," you whined.

"Sorry, sorry," he recovered with a sniff and then drank from his own glass.

You narrowed your eyes and blurted out: "You knew."

"Of course I knew. Joshuji told me what his involvement in the making of your book was," he sent a cheeky look at you.

"Oh," you gulped. "He did? Why... when?"

"Before you guys got serious he... uh," he dropped his gaze, seemingly deep in thought for a second and then he shook his head. "I shouldn't be telling you this, anyway but he told me about you so, it's fair game."

"What are you talking about, Hannie?" you frowned, a deep remorseful feeling settling in your stomach.

"One night I got a call to come pick him up at Cheol's bar. When I got there, he was completely gone," he sighed and looked upwards to the ceiling, much as if he were uncomfortable by the predicament of being both Joshua's friend and now yours. "You had uh... you guys had a fight, or at least he told me you were taking some time to think about what you wanted."

"Hold on, when was this?" you inquired, your heart sank upon hearing this, and desperately wanted to pinpoint the time when this had taken place.

"I don't know, a month ago? Maybe. I know you guys weren't serious yet. I took him into my car, he was crying like a baby, telling me that he fucked up, that he ruined everything with you, blablabla," he rambled, only pausing to drink from his glass, emptying it completely and then started to refill it.

"Jeonghan, stop," you raised a hand. "Slowly, please."

He sighed again, adding a little grunt in the process. "The next day, he woke up in my apartment, hungover as fuck, he almost didn't know where he was, he didn't even remember being at Cheol's bar," he leaned back on the chair again, crossing his arms over his chest. "He told me everything about you because I wouldn't let him go without him explaining what got him like that."

"Did he..." you inhaled deeply. "Did he tell you why we fought?"

"Yeah, he told me," he whispered, nodding with his head and then he smiled at you. "He told me a lot of things. He told me more about you. And I asked him why you guys got into a no strings attached thing in the first place and he told me he was helping you write some scenes for your book."

You had to look away from him for a moment, squeezing your eyes shut to the image running in your mind, causing you a deep pain that sunk into your chest.

"God," you gasped. Your eyes brimmed with tears when you opened them again.

"Look, I know you wanted a fun, snarky response from me but... I'm telling you all of this because I want you to know, he loves you," he placed a hand on the crown of your haid, ruffling your hair in the process. "He's just dumb when it comes to showing it."

"He never told me all of this," you whispered, wiping a tear from your eye with the back of your hand.

"Of course he didn't," he said, shrugging off. "He probably didn't want you to know that he cried in my car, drunk off his ass."

You leaned your head to one side, sniffing loudly. "I've hurt him so much..." you sobbed, your voice was a mere whine.

"And he has hurt you."

He grabbed his glass and downed its contents in one go. He looked at you, chin raised, heavy lidded eyes now from the alcohol working fast in his system.

"But that's what you're getting for when you're in a relationship, right?" he asked, stretching his arms over his head. "Ups and downs."

"Right," you mumbled with some thought, feeling your gaze lose focus in the wall behind Jeonghan.

"Well, we were signing books, weren't we?" he said abruptly,

You scoffed, grabbed another book and opened its lap to sign the first page while Jeonghan watched you carefully.

"Do you have another marker in here?" he asked, rummaging in your pencil case and pulling out another black marker. "Nice."

"Jeonghan, what–," you blurted out, watching him take a new book, opening the first page and replicating your author's signature nearly to the point. "The fuck?"

"Yeah, I'm not proud about this," he muttered as he put another book in front of him on the table. "But it's coming in handy right now, isn't it?"

You smiled, the sound coming from your lips drew his eyes to your face. "Yeah, knock yourself off, you little humbug."

"Hehe."

The week went by slowly again. Slower than before, it felt like.

You continued to be on top of your work, trying to channel those days  when you kept yourself so busy to even think about Joshua, back when he lived thirty seconds away from you.

So your days would look like this: wake up, tend to your needs, turn your computer on, get as much work done without dwelling on the fact that your boyfriend was far away, probably in a city you'd never been before.

Sometimes, he would have the time to call you; and you would talk for a good chunk of time. Sometimes, he wouldn't even return your texts, being so that he didn't have the time and when he did you were already asleep.

The biggest challenge for you was going to bed. But that was almost routine for you. Rolling in your bed, or trying to hold onto the pillow that no longer held the scent of your boyfriend's hair.

When the day of the book release rolled around, you lied in your bed, staring at the ceiling until your alarm beeped. You reached out to stop the annoying sound alarm from your phone and sighed, hoping that the day ahead of you wasn't as bleak as your sleepless night.

But maybe you were just being too much of a pessimist.

You hit off the day by checking your email, texts and such. Apparently your book was one of the most anticipated releases for the Fantasy genre, and the pre-release had also been a success. So you just checked if everything was going alright, not caring to see anything about reviews or anything pertaining to the reception just yet.

So you kept yourself busy towards the time when you had to start to get ready for the party later in the night. Your normal day to day tasks were only interrupted by a call from the smart doorbell ringing.

You approached the small screen and were promptly notified that someone had sent you flowers.

"Come on in," you replied politely and granted them access to the elevator.

The delivery service man was at your door in less than two minutes. The flower bouquet was arranged already in a pretty ceramic vase, a light pink bow wrapped around it, safekeeping a card.

You gently placed the vase in the middle of your dining table. Already knowing the one person who would send you flowers. But you took a moment before opening the envelope to see how pretty the bouquet was.

It was an assortment of all types of flowers and colors, white, yellow, pink, and blue. Then you grabbed the small envelope tucked beneath the bow.

Congratulations, baby! I wish I could be there to give you these in person. But I guess I can give you more flowers every day to make up for it, right?

I am proud of you, bunny. I love you and I miss you every second.

J.

[19:32 PM] you: thank you for the flowers, Josh. I loved them 🥰

You waited for a few seconds in hopes that he would appear online, to receive a text back, a call, anything. But his last message was an I love you, bunny, that he sent more than twenty four hours ago.

Releasing a sigh, you decided to give up your phone, since you had been obsessing over it since Joshua left and it was causing you so much mental stress that you thought you would break soon.

Besides, you would have to be ready soon. Jeonghan had offered to come pick you up himself. More like he just instructed you to be ready, not giving you a chance to pass it up for mere politeness.

But Jeonghan had become your friend, he was no longer just Joshua's friend.

Standing in front of the long mirror, you debated whether to change your dress into a two-piece suit, thinking it might be more in line with the nature of the celebration. But the dress fitted you well, it hugged you in all the right ways. The color of the fabric complimented your skin and the length came just above your knees, legs covered by stockings too.

With a sigh, you grabbed your high heels and went to open the door.

Jeonghan stood there, hand raised in a fist and a startled look in his eye. "How did you know I was already here?"

"Takes me about a minute to get here from the lobby and you just rang the doorbell, so," you replied with a dark and gloomy air about you. "So, let's go."

"Wait," he muttered softly, blocking your way. "Fix your attitude first."

"What?" you grimaced. But he only crossed his arms on his chest, tilting his head to one side. "Jeonghan, I just want to get over this."

His eyebrows pushed up. "This?" he hissed, now looking more serious with a low tone, adding: "This is your party, celebrating your accomplishment. Quit being so hung up on Joshua not being here. This is your night. Come on, let's go."

"Fine," you huffed, following him down the hallway and into the elevator. "I'm so getting drunk tonight."

"Tsk, ah you're so dramatic," he replied, rubbing one eye with the tips of his fingers. "But if it makes you feel better I am in the mood for a drink. Or two."

"It does make me feel better," you muttered awkwardly after the reproachful look Jeonghan gave you, then you feel your face contort into a smile. "You can get really feisty."

"That's the pot calling the kettle black," he muttered and broke into a chuckle himself.

"What," you blurted and his laugh became louder. "And I'm old? You're the one saying the grandpa stuff!"

"It's your influence," he finished chuckling, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye. "I gotta stop hanging out with you."

"And deprive yourself of good company?" you mumbled under a breath, chest swelling with pride when you could see him choke on his words, a perplexed look on his face was the last thing you saw as you walked out of the elevator.

"Ah, they learn so fast," Jeonghan said with a long sigh, his tone rising in a sing-song manner as he closed the door to his car, you sitting on the passenger seat, smoothing out the skirt of your pretty dress.

The launch party was meant to be a small gathering between friends. Since you were an anonymous author, there was no point in having a public party or in a big library with readers so this party was just to celebrate the launch.

When Jeonghan pulled up at the drive in, the car doors were opened for both of you and you stepped out to a restaurant. The front was adorned with bamboo trees and low warm lighting.

"Hold on," Jeonghan called from behind you, and you noticed that he looked somewhat jittery, sucking in a breath through his teeth. "Do you think I'm still walking funny?"

You gasped at him in exasperation. "Stop trying to distract me, Jeonghan," you whined, rolling your eyes. "Yeah, you still have a limp, but nobody is going to notice. Now can we go inside?"

"Wait, no," he laughed uncomfortably, motioning you over with a hand. "Come here."

"What?" you asked, your face dropping when you saw the serious look on his face.

Jeonghan appeared to be struggling with the tiny brooch clasped on one side of his silk shirt. "I didn't know what to get you… you don't strike me as someone who likes presents," Jeonghan began to explain, casting a meek look at your face. "And after all, you're the first writer I've ever known to publish a book."

You laughed, and rolled your eyes at his bad joke. "What is it?" you asked with excitedness now as his lithe fingers approached you.

"Can I?" he motioned to the chest of your pretty dress and waited until you nodded at him.

It was a dainty gold brooch in the shape of a dragonfly. As you ran your fingers over its small wings, you felt the small stones embedded in them.

"It's supposed to symbolize good luck," he said with a hint of nervousness.

"Thank you. I love it, Jeongjeong," you showed him a smile.

The wind picked up a little, tousling his long black hair; the fringe tangled his eyelashes and made him blink repeatedly, making you giggle. He mirrored your smile and for an instant you thought you saw something change in his eyes.

But he took a step back, pleased with the view of his gift on you, which he placed on one side of your chest.

"Yeah, it's nothing. You don't have to thank me," he brushed off, putting his hand back into his pocket. "Let's go inside.

The section that was reserved for the party was a bar area secluded at the back of the restaurant. As you approached it, being led by Jeonghan walking in front of you, eyeing you every two seconds as if confirming you hadn't run away.

"Okay, are you ready?" he said, stopping before a sliding bamboo door.

"Yeah," you replied, but your tone was full of uncertainty.

"Just put on your best smile, pretend that all of this is a surprise," he coached you just before sliding the door open, doing a half bow and his arm pointing you inside the small bar area section.

You were instantly received with a loud welcome, some of your friends were there, cheering, clapping. It totally threw a blazing hot blush on your face, but you were quick to act surprised and overly cheerful.

Your best friend, Yena, came running to you to wrap you in a hug that almost had you stumbling backwards. She laughed and bounced grabbing your hands, her joy contagious.

"You made it, you made it, you made it," she chirped with a bright smile, but her pretty eyes dimmed upon reading your face expertly. "Are you not happy? What happened?" she asked and immediately knew: "It's him, right? He's not coming."

But before you could even open your mouth to utter a word, a glass of champagne was slided onto your hand. Jeonghan appeared from behind you, handing you the glass with a meaningful look in his eye.

"Come on, have a drink," he instructed and pressed his lips into a smile at Yena in a polite manner.

You immediately downed the glass in three big gulps.

"Oh, okay," Yena narrowed her eyes, understanding the situation. "We're not talking about it, right."

The room was elegant. The walls were painted a dark color, but the warm lights shone beautifully on the pictures hanging on them, also casting shadows on the high tables.

You assumed that the area was intended for parties such as this. It seemed like an extended part of the restaurant, except it was closed off to the general consumers.

The thing about having a party to celebrate something for yourself was that you had to be the center of attention. Luckily, a lot of your guests wanted to talk about your book, about the process of writing it, about how good it was that it was out, and about making numbers.

There were one or two people from the press, sent by your agency to answer some basic questions for publicity pieces and the like. They didn't take your picture, of course, as that would defeat the purpose of anonymity.

All you had to do was have a smile on your face, be polite, be friendly, but something was off. And you didn't want to think about it, but your fingers itched to grab your phone and check if there were any messages from Joshua.

"Okay, we have like one more hour to go," Jeonghan told you, probably reading in your demeanor that you ached to go home.

"What am I going to do in one more hour?" you said insufferably.

"I don't know, I've never been to a book release party," he shrugged.

"What do you do on opening nights of plays you've directed?" you asked him.

"You mean on closing nights," he corrected, pursing his lips cutely. "It's different because a play is more like a team project. I usually just thank the people that helped me make it happen."

"I don't want to make a speech," you quickly said, seeing the little glint in his eye. "I have nothing prepared."

"You'll figure it out," he muttered before turning to the room and clearing his throat loudly.

Jeonghan grabbed two glasses of champagne, gave you one and then gave you a small encouraging smile.

"Hi, everyone," you started, a chirpy nervousness quivering your tone. You cleared your throat and once you got enough eyes on you, continued. "I just wanted to thank you all for coming, and for sharing this night with me."

You looked to the man standing by your side. Jeonghan's lips were pressed in a smile, he nodded at you and placed a lithe, delicate hand on your lower back, as if giving you his support.

"I uh, refrained from doing this party, feeling like my obligation as a writer was done the minute the first copies were printed but, that's not true," you breathed out shakily. "You're all here because you've helped me throughout this process, even with things you're aware of, or things like just being a good friend to me."

You briefly looked at Jeonghan again, his smile had fallen, but his sweet eyes locked on yours.

"I have to thank Jeonghan here, whom without none of us would be here, because I don't know how to throw a party," you heard some muffle laughter, and continued anyway. "I wouldn't have done this without you, Jeongjeong."

Jeonghan dropped his hand from your lower back, blinked slowly at you, the ghost of a smile painting his pink lips.

"How was it?" you asked nervously afterwards, feeling your limbs trembling slightly, a side effect from speaking in front of a crowd.

"You're good with words. It's almost like it's your job," Jeonghan replied, his soft brown eyes lighting up when he saw you smile and heard you laugh.

"Please," you stammered a little.

"I'm being honest," he shrugged. "You know I can be honest sometimes."

"Mmn," you pushed your lower lip outwards, narrowing your eyes at him. "I find that hard to believe."

"Well," he pondered for a second, drawing in a slow breath. "I'm always honest to you, princess."

"Why do I find that more suspicious?" you jibed at him.

He tore his eyes from your face with an embarrassed smile. "Shut up," he scoffed, raising his glass up to you and you drank with him, hearing some people clinking glasses together, some people cheering and a very distinct voice calling your name,

"Congratulations, bunny."

You instantly turned to see your boyfriend, standing behind you, so close that you just took one step to him, his arms wrapping around your body, hugging you tightly.

Your mind instantly began reeling, a thrill of both excitement and frustration coursed through you, bubbling inside your chest. "How... what are you doing here?" you gasped, holding onto him. "I thought you weren't going to make it..."

Joshua kissed your head while he hugged you, his hands rubbing up and down your back until he heard you sob. He pulled back and cupped your face with his hands, looking at your eyes with a soft expression in his face.

"And miss your big day?" he asked, leaning closer to press a tender kiss on your lips. "Wouldn't dream of it."

All the words you've been meaning to tell him coiled in your throat again. The painful thoughts made you recoil, thinking that it was best to tell him in private. So you returned the soft kiss, pressing your lips on his lower lip, feeling his small smile.

"Thank you for being here, Josh," you whispered, pulling back to take a look at his face.

The bags under his dark beautiful eyes denoted not only a long and exhausting day but weeks of hard work and no rest in between. He even looked a little pale under the warm glow of the lamps on top of both of you.

You suddenly wished you could feel bad for him, for all the accumulated remorse, frustration and sadness of him leaving, for his lack of communication, for making you feel neglected, even if he didn't intend to do so.

Joshua pressed his lips, nodding at you with a knowing look when he understood the discontent on your reaction.

"We'll talk later, okay?" you mumbled, giving him a squeeze on his arm.

"Okay," he replied, his eyes drifting from your face and falling on a figure standing beside you. A tired smile drew on your boyfriend's face as he approached his best friend. "Hannie."

They exchanged a quick hug and Joshua thanked him for helping throw the party for you. With a pang of concern, you wondered then if Joshua had heard your brief speech before he decided to approach you.

Joshua let out a sharp exhale, pulling out his phone from the back pocket of his jeans. "I have to take this," he told you, planting a kiss on your forehead and excusing himself out of the room.

You followed him with your eyes until you lost sight of him, releasing a sigh of your own, coming to grips with what was happening, you turned to Jeonghan.

"Did you know?" you demanded.

He pushed his eyebrows up. "Know what?"

"That he was coming!" you gasped, looking around to make sure no one was paying attention to the whole exchange.

"Of course not," he leaned his head back, eyeing you with a hint of reproach. "I would've told you. You know that."

You caught the certainty in his eyes. You knew that Jeonghan was a crafty liar, but he has shown you that no matter what, he has your back.

"Why do you look like that?" he muttered discreetly.

"Like what?" you mumbled with a tiny voice.

"You're doing that thing with your face when you're about to cry. Oh no–," he muttered quickly and then, his whole stance changed, he took a step closer to you, as if shielding you from the eyes of your guests when you took a sharp intake of breath, your sob resounding loudly.

"Princess, don't cry right now," he said gently, stretching an arm to reach for a napkin on the table behind you and passing it to you.

"I'm so mad at him," you whispered, lowering your head so you could easily hide your tears.

"I don't understand. You wanted him here, you cried for days because he wasn't coming and now that he is here, you're mad at him?" he muttered hurriedly, and you looked up to see his frown.

"He didn't tell me he was going to be here," you sniffed quietly, using the napkin to carefully gather your tears without ruining your makeup completely.

"That doesn't help me understand," he gave you an awkward smile, darting a look up and then back at you. "Listen, he's coming back. You can go to the washroom behind me, or you can confront him now."

You rolled your eyes, seeing the triumphant smirk stretching on his lips, because he knew what you'd choose. "Screw you, Jeonghan."

"I'll cover you. Go," he nodded back to the hallway behind him.

You swiftly walked down the hallway and towards the door of the washroom. Luckily your quick argument with Jeonghan got you heated enough that you composed yourself from the rageful fit towards your boyfriend.

So you just made sure that the makeup you used in your eyes and your lashes hadn't run. Looking in the mirror for any signs that you had cried at your own party and when you were certain enough, you walked back to the table.

Joshua was already there, having a lively conversation with Jeonghan. Your boyfriend's face lit up when he saw you, it was an attentive look he gave you, extending a hand at you as you made your way to his side, and he quickly secured an arm around your waist.

"Everything alright, bunny?" he asked.

"Joshua," you gasped, looking at Jeonghan who was witnessing your pet name being thrown around freely.

"What?" he chuckled, his smile drawing lines on the corner of his eyes.

"Don't call me that in front of people," you whined with a high pitch tone that would instantly send a warm rush of blood to your face.

"Why? You're embarrassed of what Jeonghan would think of it, baby?" he teased and you smashed a hand against his shoulder playfully.

"Yes!" you replied in an obvious tone.

"Don't worry, baby. You can trust that Hannie won't judge," he said, casting a glance to his best friend.

You suddenly felt like you were missing something. Looking at Jeonghan who just smiled at you playfully while your boyfriend appeared to be mirroring his smirk.

"Still, it makes me feel embarrassed," you muttered quietly but it was too late now.

Jeonghan chuckled at the expression on your face, mocking you a bit like he usually does. "While you two lovebirds are tearing at each other, I have to go get something arranged," he said, swiftly making his way to talk to someone from the staff.

You awkwardly turned to see your boyfriend, who broke into a shameless laugh. "Joshua, you can't be calling me bunny in front of Jeonghan."

"Why not?" he asked, shrugging off with some ease. "He calls you princess."

"You," you choked. "You know that?"

Joshua drew in a breath, chest swelling as he nodded with his head. "Yeah, I know that," he replied shortly. "I heard him."

"I thought it was a normal thing for him," you frowned, feeling a little confused.

"It's not," he breathed out, bringing up a hand to pinch your chin gingerly. "We'll talk about it later, okay?"

"Are you sure?" you blurted, reading the features of his face desperately. "I do-don't want you to think that–"

"Baby," he whispered, shaking his head slightly. "We'll talk about it later."

You decided to let that matter rest then, thinking that it was best to start by what was more important to you.

"We need to talk about many things," you said, arching an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I know," he tilted your head back using his hand on your chin, to gently press a kiss on your lips. "Let's enjoy tonight? I have something for you."

Joshua drew a small box from the pocket of his jacket. It was a black velvet box that fit perfectly in the palm of his hand. Your heart almost gave out as he used his other hand to open it, and your hand flew to your chest.

But it was a dainty necklace, a heart locket made of gold. Heart racing, you looked up at his doe eyes, which were smiling softly upon seeing your reaction.

"Do you like it, baby?"

"Yeah," you breathed. "It's beautiful, Josh."

"Turn around," he motioned you over so he could clasp it around your neck. You pulled your hair back to give him access to your neck and placed the necklace around it. You reached for the delicate heart locket with your fingers, feeling something engraved into it.

At that moment, Jeonghan returned with a smile on his face that told you he was up to something. "The cake is here! Finally."

"What cake?!" you gasped, your heart sinking to your stomach when he pulled out his phone and started recording your face.

"Should we sing happy birthday? After all it's your book's birthday," he teased with a mischievous grin and called, "Everyone!"

Then as if on cue, everyone around you, your guests, your friends, your boyfriend behind you started chanting a happy birthday song as a big cake in the shape of your book, was neatly placed in the high top table in front of you.

You smiled when you noticed that the art of the cake was an exact replica of the cover of your book.

As the chorus continued on, you tried to keep a smile on your face, although the blush had started to create a tingling sensation on your cheeks now from the embarrassment and from being the only center of attention.

Jeonghan smiled broadly at you, keeping the camera of his phone steady on your face. He seemed content with his work, with all of the things he planned for this night.

A warm hand parked on your lower back. Joshua gave you a reassuring smile, singing along with all of your guests and friends until the song came to its end. You almost died of embarrassment. But you smiled back at your boyfriend and tried your best to enjoy the rest of the night.

The ride back home was quiet. You didn't mind this until a large and warm hand landed on top of your thigh, squishing your skin over the fabric of your stockings.

It was a squeeze that demanded attention, a look, a word, anything. Though you continued to look out the window, a wave of remorse eating you from the inside.

You fought the need to say something, but being so that the painful thoughts plagued your mind, the best choice was to keep quiet until you got home.

Still, you slid a hand on top of his.

You burned to tell him everything that kept you awake at night, you needed him to know what you felt during the days of his radio silence.

"Is everything okay, baby?" Joshua asked, following you out of the elevator and down the hallway to your door. "You've been very quiet."

The more you thought of an answer, the angrier you felt. You bit on the inside of your cheek as you opened the door for him. The twist in your stomach tightening as you crossed the living room, discarding his leather jacket on the chair placed in one corner of your bedroom.

You had no idea if he was still close behind you, the buzzing in your ears worsening as the first hiccup came.

"Baby, tell me what's wrong," you heard him say, a hint of concern lacing his sweet tone.

"You–," you choked on a sob, turning to see his face, the face you wanted to see for days. "You made me believe you weren't coming! To what end? To surprise me?"

You saw Joshua's mouth parting as he searched for words and just as he was about to start explaining himself, your rage made you spurt out words out of your mouth, tears rolling down your cheeks.

"Do you know how fucking bad I felt the whole time?" you demanded, turning away from him when you saw his face contort into a sad frown. "I thought you didn't care enough to be here, do you know how fucked up is that?"

You were standing in front of your dresser, pretending to take off your earrings but the silence from him was killing you, so you turned around again to see him.

Joshua looked at you cautiously for a second, his throat bobbing as it seemed that he too choked on his own words. "I didn't want to give you any false hope by telling you I'd be here when I wasn't sure myself," he said with a low tone, giving you a guilty look. "I tried to get as much work done as possible so I could come see you."

You sniffed, standing with your shoulders drawn back, feeling yourself guarding up again. "Why didn't you at least say something today?" you uttered, tasting the saltiness of your tears that fell on the corners of your lips.

"I've been working from six in the morning," he said, cocking his head to one side. "And then I was on another flight, exhausted so I fell asleep."

"That's a bad excuse, Joshua," you reprimanded with ire blinding you now, taking your high heels to toss them on one corner of your closet.

"All day I've been checking my phone to see if I get anything from you, do you know how that feels?" you were raising your voice now, from the bottled up emotions, the stress and frustration from today.

"Yes. I do, actually."

Joshua looked upwards, releasing a sigh that made his shoulders go slack. He looked like he hated this, to fight with you. He looked the same way he did that night when you both got angry at each other on the rooftop.

You trapped your lower lip between your teeth in an attempt to stop it from quivering and looked away from your boyfriend's face.

"I'm sorry," he said, now looking at you again, sorrow in his eyes as he took a cautious step towards you. "I'm so sorry, baby. I tried to get here as a surprise, yes. But I just couldn't leave without getting work done first and that delayed everything. I couldn't get to your party on time and I'm sorry for it."

As soon as his arms wrapped around you, you hid your face on the crook of his neck. With a strangled sob, you got the scent of his musky cologne, the very distinct smell of his skin as you clung to the white t-shirt he was wearing.

"I'm sorry too," you whispered.

"Sh, it's okay. It's okay," he shushed repeatedly, grabbing your face with his hands and leaned to look in your eyes, face to face. "You have nothing to apologize for, baby. This is on me, I fucked up and I am sorry."

"I shouldn't have yelled at you," you sobbed and quieted down when he pressed his forehead against yours.

"It's okay, it's okay" he replied, swallowing hard. "Yell at me, swear at me, but talk to me, baby. Don't keep it to yourself."

"I was so mad," you mumbled, grabbing his wrists with your hands.

Joshua pulled back, giving you space to breathe. You saw the remorse in his face, his eyebrows knitting together, his big eyes following your mouth and your eyes as you continued to shed tears.

"I thought that you didn't care to be here," you confessed with a tiny hiccup.

"I'm sorry baby, that was the least of my intentions," he replied softly, but you could see the trouble it caused him to hear you say that. "Believe me, I tried to get to your party on time."

"I believe you, Josh," you replied, feeling like you could start crying again. "But I just wish you'd let me know earlier."

A deep frown appeared on his face. "I never wanted to make you feel bad, baby."

Before you could hold rein to your actions, your head tilted, your heart already giving into the big brown eyes that were pleading for you to forgive him.

"I told you that next time I wouldn't be too forgiving," you reminded him, your tone coated with a gentleness that signified your resignation over your anger.

Joshua's gaze softened, lifting a hand to caress your cheek with his long and delicate fingers. "I know, baby. I'm so sorry" he sighed in relief when you suddenly wrapped your arms around him, burying your face in the crook of his neck. "How can I make it up to you?"

"Just..." you whispered, pulling back slightly, hands encircling his neck lightly. "Kiss me."

He looked unsure for a second. As if he wanted to say more, but quickly obliged to your request, seeing that you were seeking something more than an exchange of words. You needed him.

His hand found your chin, grabbing you gently as he leaned closer, swallowing hard before pressing his lips on yours. Your hands cupped the back of his head, urging him to kiss you deeper, harder.

"Baby," he grunted in your mouth. "Don't you think we need to talk more about this?"

"No," you brushed off immediately, using your hands to press on the back of his head, crushing your mouth on his.

But even if he was returning the kiss, you didn't feel him there. You could almost hear his mind reeling.

"Please, Joshua," you sobbed, something so desperate in you that your voice quivered. "Please, baby, just kiss me."

"We need to talk," he responded. "We've been going around in circles with this. We can't solve this by having sex. You know that."

"What are you talking about?" you pulled back, retrieving your hands from his nape.

He looked at you in disbelief for a second. "I know something's wrong," he frowned. "I've known you long enough to notice when you're deflecting."

"Josh," you sighed.

"Baby, you promised," he insisted, his big eyes reading your face.

"What do you want me to say?" you blurted, digging your grave further.

"What's going on?" he asked gently.

Your heart crushed at the look he gave you. Like a lost puppy, trying to chase you, you tried to ignore the sound of his voice breaking a little.

"It's nothing," you whispered. "I've been a little bummed about you leaving—no, not leaving. I just wish you reached out to me more frequently. We talked about this last time! You've been ignoring me and I feel hurt over that."

"I don't do it on purpose," he said with a tired sigh, but he looked guilty. "I try to get all of your messages but the truth is... I'm tired."

Your heart deflated, but you quickly understood that he wasn't talking about you, or your relationship. Joshua meant his life, his career taking off faster than he or you could comprehend.

"Everything is happening so fast, I feel like I haven't had time to breathe," he said with a strangled tone. "I'm sorry, baby. I never meant for you to be affected by this. By me."

You reached out to hold his hand, making his big eyes look back to you. "Why didn't you tell me?" you asked softly.

"I don't want to burden you, bunny," he muttered, squeezing your hand. "But I realize now that it was better to tell you. None of this would've happened if I had."

You used your free hand to push his hair back from his face. "I should've told you sooner too."

The corners of his lips rose slightly. "I guess we're both learning about this, right?"

"I guess we are," you whispered.

"C'mere," he mouthed, wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug, one arm around your waist and the other across your back, his hand reaching the back of your head.

His kiss was tender at first, his lips brushing yours softly, his tongue caressing your lower lip, once, twice until you moaned helplessly. Then the kiss deepened, demanding more from each other, your breath hitched as his mouth crushed into yours, tongues meeting with hunger.

Your hands searched for the hem of his white t-shirt, pulling it up clumsily.

Joshua pulled back from the kiss, yanking his t-shirt from his body in one movement and tossed it to one side blindly. Then you heard him inhale sharply when your hands ran over his toned pecs, to his lats, feeling the hard muscle, his soft skin.

You kissed his mouth, his cheek, a hand caressing his long hair as you moved to kiss his eyelids, standing on your tiptoes to reach him.

Joshua laughed softly, his hands squeezing your waist with urge. "Sit back, baby," he pushed you to the edge of your bed.

You obediently did so, but hooked your fingers on the belt of his jeans, pulling him towards you. You heard a gasp that resembled the sound he makes when he smiles.

"Oh," he blurted. "Baby, slow down."

You were placing open mouthed kisses on his tummy, a soft moan escaped you when you caught the familiar taste of his skin. Your hands caressed him as your kisses trailed up his pecs, licking one nipple first.

"Mmn," he hummed softly, his hand cupping the side of your head when your teeth grazed the underside of his pectoral, playfully landing more kisses around the sensitive area of his darkened bud.

You took your time doing the same exploration on the other side of his chest. The tip of your tongue lapping on his nipple, tasting his skin, the scent of his cologne.

You suckled on his skin harshly, hearing a soft grunt reverberating on the chest you were leaving marks on.

"Lie back, sweetheart," he urged when you detached your mouth from his beautiful skin, now marked with reddened spots.

You crawled on the bed, watching him follow you, pressing one knee after the other, looking at you with a gaze darkened with lust and love.

Joshua pressed his body against yours, trapped now between him and your mattress. He resumed kissing you deeply, his hand crept from your face, down to your neck, caressing your shoulder, searching for your hand to lace his fingers with yours.

"Joshua," you mumbled into his mouth as he gave you shallow kisses, moaning softly in your lips. "Baby."

"Mm?" he responded, kissing your mouth as if he wanted to melt into you.

"I want you to do something for me," you said, your breath catching when he flipped your body and his on the bed, so now you were straddling him. Some of the seams of the skirt of your dress ripped, and you pulled it upwards, uncovering up to your butt.

"Anything," he breathed, the pads of his pointer and middle finger grazing your cheek, holding you still as he placed feathery kisses on your lips.

You pulled back slightly, looking at the beautiful features of his face. "This is going to sound crazy."

The soft lines between his eyebrows showed when he frowned ever so slightly. "What?" he asked, his eyes reading your every expression.

You fidgeted with the long strands of his hair, looking for the words to express what you wanted without sounding ridiculous.

"Do you want to take control, baby?" he guessed, moving his head to one side while reading your face with his eyes. "Is that what you want?"

"No, no," you giggled a bit from how far off his idea was from yours. "It's quite the opposite really..." you brushed the studded piercing with your thumb, making his eyelids flutter.

"Tell me what you want, bunny," he whispered.

"I want you to be... hard on me, Josh," you asked, positioning your knees firmly on the bed to press your crotch on the hard bulge beneath his pants.

A low grunt coiled in his throat, his hands sliding down your body to grasp your hips. "Why?" he grunted, his frown not relaxing.

"I just want it," you pressed down again, moving your crotch against his hardened cock, the seam of his jeans rubbing against the sensitive bud of your cunt. "Please?"

"Mmn," he hummed seemingly pondering over your request, his hand came up to hold your chin, pressing open mouthed kisses on your lips. "Don't you want me to spoil you tonight, baby?"

"You can spoil me by being a little mean to me," you teased, a grin appearing on your lips, which he kissed right away.

"That's something I never thought you'd say, baby," he admitted with a breathy chuckle that you felt in your mouth.

"Please, Josh?" you pleaded, putting on your best puppy eyes.

"Do you think you deserve it, baby?" he asked, his voice merely a rasp.

You took some consideration over his words and then nodded slowly, mouthing, "Yeah, I do."

"Have you been bad, sweetheart?" his tone had recovered, now waking with the usual tone he uses when he's domming you.

"Yeah, I think I have been," you responded with a sweet tone of your own.

His pretty pouty lips stretched in a small smirk. "Mmn, my baby was bad while I was away?" he purred, his dark eyes glimmering under the soft lights of your bedroom lamps.

"Maybe a little," you replied cheekily.

"A little?" he toyed, giggling a little. "If you were only a little, I don't see why I should go hard on you."

"Mm, because I want you to," you replied, pouting at him now. "Come on, baby. I can take it."

He appeared to be considering your proposition, weighing in your words, the look on your face, the determination he probably saw in you and with a final booping of your nose with the tip of his finger he nodded.

"Anything that you don't like, anything you feel wrong, you can tell me," he promised. "You know that, right?"

"I know, Josh." you smiled meekly at him, caressing his dark locks.

"That's my baby," he whispered, the ghost of a smile on his lips as he met them with your own.

You knew why he said this every time he dommed you. Within all of the nights that you have spent under his control, though not many, you've gotten a sense that he said this because without your consent, none of it would work.

It was simple. Joshua would go as far as you would allow him to go.

His hand left the side of your thigh and found your neck, the pads of his fingers caressing your jawline as he brought your face down so he could kiss you.

"Why have you been bad, baby?"

A deep remorseful feeling settled in the pit of your stomach. You knew he'd try to understand why you wanted him to punish you. By now it was some form of therapy for the two of you, letting it out on sex, talking it out, reconciliations during after care.

But this time, instead of you dodging your answers, Joshua gave it right for you.

"Have you been losing trust in me lately?" he asked, his tone soft and so calculated that you had to pull back to take a look at the features of his face. "Is that how you've been bad?"

"Yeah," you whispered, waiting for his reaction, expecting to see him turning this around and trying to talk you out of the situation. "Are you mad at me?"

"No baby, of course not," he reassured, drawing in a breath as his hand grasping the side of your neck pulled you in for another long, wet kiss.

"But, don't you think I need to be punished?" you asked with an overly sweet and innocent tone.

"Is that why you want me to go hard on you?" he growled as you decided to start grinding on him again. "You want me to, god, slow down, baby."

You immediately slowed the sway of your hips on him, deciding to ease your weight on him, moving your crotch ever so slightly on his. "Yeah," you replied, pressing down on his crotch, angling your cunt against the seam of his jeans.

"Do you feel like you need to be punished, bunny?" he leaned his head in the direction of his shoulder.

"I do, Josh," you mewled with a sigh, pressing your crotch on him slowly.

"Then that's all I need," he growled in your mouth, cupping the back of your head to capture your lips with his own with a gasp, kissing you fervently.

His fingers tangled into the hair growing on the base of your head, fisting it as the kiss turned into a hard, heated one. You felt a hand searching the chest of your dress, then you understood that he was getting rid of the brooch Jeonghan gave you.

Joshua tossed it aside, your gift landing somewhere on the bed. "I need you out of this," he grunted in your mouth, his fist scrunching the skirt of your dress, motioning it upwards.

"Help me with the zipper?" you asked with a nervous whisper.

"Yeah," he replied, fingers swiftly getting zipping down your dress.

You climbed off of him and the bed altogether, removing your dress with a playfulness to your movements. Joshua propped himself on his elbows to watch you reveal a new set of lingerie, the pastel blue contrasting with the thigh high black stockings.

"Do you like it?" you mumbled sweetly, lifting your arms delicately before you did a half twirl for him, showing him the back of your panties, that exposed your buttcheeks.

Joshua sighed in delight, pushing himself off the bed and walked to you. "I love it, baby," he replied.

"Do you want me to leave it on?" you asked, as you reached out to get the rest of his clothes, undoing his belt with shaky fingers.

"For now, yeah," he replied gruffly, watching you zip his pants down, tucking your hands beneath the stretchy fabric of his black boxers to yank them down and he helped you remove them by stepping out of his clothes.

Once he was wholly naked, you marveled in all his beauty, the proud nakedness in which he stood in front of you.

A fingertip dipped gently in his belly button, making him smile fondly at you. But the smile faltered when you trailed down, feeling the soft hairs of the happy trail that led to his pubic hair.

Your fingers encircled around the girth of his cock, already hard for you. The skin of his shaft was soft, interrupted only by the vein on the underside and the ridges before the bulbous, rosy brown head. You pumped him slowly, gently, your thumb gathering the precum gathering in his slit.

You sank to your knees, casting a look up at him. Your eyes locked with his as you pressed a soft kiss on the tip of his cock, licking your lips, tasting his precum in the process.

His hand brushed your hair from one side of your head. "Baby," he rasped. "Oh, god, baby," he moaned deeply when you took his cockhead into your mouth, wrapping your lips around it, tongue pressing on him as you pushed your head forward.

You slowly bobbed your head back and forth, taking him an inch further at a time, swirling your tongue around his cockhead every time you pulled your mouth back on him.

"Fuck, baby," he whispered gruffly, closing his eyes briefly to then use his hands to pull your head back. "Just like that."

You lapped your tongue on his cockhead, running the soft part of the underside of your tongue around him as you moved your head back, a soft smacking noise created by your lips when you kissed his tip.

"Do you want to fuck my mouth, Josh?" you asked using a sweet tone, looking up to his eyes, which darkened with lust and fascination over you.

"Do you still remember how to do this, baby?" he asked, grabbing his drool coated cock with one hand, the other parking firmly on the back of your head, holding you steady.

Your eyes looked up to him, his facial expression controlled, measured as he smirked at you when you instinctively parted your mouth for him. "Good girl."

You pulled out your tongue, letting him rest his heavy cock on top of it. When you heard a soft grunt escape him, you closed your lips around his thick girth, simulating an open kiss, pulling your mouth back and creating a soft, smacking sound on the reddened tip of his.

"I'm going to move on your mouth," he warned with a soft tone, removing his hand from his cock to hold your head now with both of his hands. "Tap on me if you want me to stop."

Your eyes dropped from his face, to the faint film sweat trailing down his neck, between his pecs and onto the hard muscles of his abdomen that clenched softly when he started pushing his cock down your throat.

A moan got muffled by his cock in your mouth. You remembered to tell yourself to relax your tongue under the heavy length of him, giving him access to fuck your mouth freely.

"That's it baby," he whispered when he felt your mouth go lax. "You always take my cock so fucking well."

Your eyes were following the movements of his body, relishing on the way he kept himself controlled, slowly pacing himself, pushing an inch farther with each thrust until you nearly brushed his soft pubic hair with the tip of your nose.

One hand moved from the back of your head to the side of your face, his thumb resting on top of your cheekbone as he commanded your eyes up to his.

"Breathe, bunny," he directed with a gentleness that betrayed his following movements.

With a gasp, he snapped his head back, ramming his cock inside your mouth. Your hands flew to hold onto the hard muscle of his thighs, gagging around his girth, the tip reaching the back of your mouth, hitting the spot repeatedly.

The hand that was still on the back of your head, holding you by your hair forced you back, to give himself ample space to push his cock farther, so that he could hear you gag around him, feel the muscles of your throat constricting around his tip.

"Fuck," he breathed, closing his eyes to the vision of you taking him so obediently. "Mmph," he let out a puff of air.

You responded with a moan of your own. Watching him screwing his eyes shut, forcing himself to keep his pace steady, slow for you instead of tearing your mouth open with his cock. Even though it was exactly what you wanted.

"Oh, god," he groaned, with his head still tilted back, his throat bobbing as he swallowed hard. "Baby—fuck. Baby you feel so, so good."

You let out a whiny noise, making him lower his gaze at you.

"I'm close," he breathed, a grunt coming out of him as he swallowed hard again. His finger digging on the soft skin of your cheek as he said. "And you are taking it all, bunny."

You moaned in a half confirmation sound as best as you could, still gagging on him, tears running down your cheeks uncontrollably, drool dripping down the corners of your lips and onto your chin.

"Good girl," he gasped softly, closing his eyes with a pleased grin on his face.

Then he lost the grin when his mouth parted, his brow furrowing gently before he moaned deeply. You held in a breath through your nose, swallowing the ropes of cum spurting out of his cock and down your throat.

Joshua had stopped his thrusts, as he came with deep breaths and tiny grunts, keeping you still for him while sighing: "Goooood fucking girl."

But he pulled out too quickly, sloppily. You noticed it was on purpose by his controlled move: using the hand on your face to push back your chin, forcing your mouth open and removing his cock from your throat.

You choked, coughed and breathed in, all within two seconds. Hot tears sprinted from your eyes as you remained on his firm grasp, keeping your head leaned back.

"Breathe. Breathe through your nose," he whispered softly, using the pad of his thumb to gather the cum and drool that you had spat back on your chin, sliding it back to your mouth. "Thaaat's it, baby. Slowly."

You breathed in desperately, heaving almost; vision going blurry in and out as more hot tears kept on falling on your cheeks.

"You did so well, bunny," he muttered, a cheeky grin falling on the features of his face.

His large hand released your hair, sliding on the side of your face, cupping it fully. You closed your eyes, a sigh escaping you because of the tenderness of his touch, feeling it cause your skin to prickle.

"Want me to make you feel good, sweetheart?"

Panting, you raised your gaze to see him. A cold shudder coursed through you when you saw his controlled manner, the enjoyment in his dark glimmering eyes.

"Please?" you mumbled, and upon speaking you had to gulp hard and clear your throat.

"Sit on the bed for me," he nodded behind you and you rose to your feet, quickly sitting on the edge of your bed. A question arose in your mind as to what were your boyfriend's next moves.

"I love it when you use these," he mumbled, running the pads of his fingers over the lace band of your high knee stockings. "You looked so beautiful tonight, baby."

"Thank you, Josh," you beamed at him, the gesture making him cup your cheek, leaning to get a quick kiss from your lips.

His hand slid to your back, skin prickling as his fingers unfastened the clasp of your pastel blue bra. The other hand grabbed your bra by its middle, pulling it from your body with one swift move, leaving your tits bare for his view.

Joshua wasted no time as his hands moved to the band of your pretty lace panties. You propped your hands behind you, leaning back slightly as he slid your panties down your thighs, unhooking one ankle after the other.

Then it was his turn to drop to his knees, your bed was high enough so he only leaned his head between your thighs, motioning them over with his large hands and you placed them each on his shoulders, locking your ankles, feet resting comfortably on his back.

"I've missed you so much, bunny," he muttered, littering your inner thighs with kisses, reaching your mound before angling your thighs open for him, his tongue lapping between your folds, giving them a broad stroke.

"Mmnph, Josh," you mewled, hands flying to tangle your fingers in his hair, following the movements of his head as he gave your cunt generous strokes with his tongue. "Joshua—fuck, baby, yes, yes."

The tip of his tongue swirled around your bud, gently tugging at it with his lips before sucking on it lightly. Your thighs flinched, a moan spilling from your lips when he stuck to flick at your clit with the tip of his tongue.

He continued teasing your clit like this until you came, fast and loud, fingers clenching on his long hair, crying out his name. But he didn't stop there, instead, you felt his lips wrap around your now swollen bud, starting to suckle at it gently.

"Josh," you called, propping yourself on your elbows. "Baby, I need you now," you mewled, but he completely ignored you.

He started to suck on your clit harder, moaning against your clit as you came on his mouth again, writing desperately, making his hands hold you down to the bed.

"Were you bad while I was away, baby?" he asked softly.

You were breathing slowly, coming down from your high with trembling limbs and barely able to utter a word when a firm slap came down your clit.

"I asked you a question," he rasped, ignoring your loud and very lewd yelp. He landed another slap, using his four fingers on your clit.

"Fuck," you breathed, flinching on your bed when you received the intense feeling of his hand clashing with your sensitive clit. "Yeah, I have."

Joshua rose to his feet, and you couldn't help but feast your eyes over his beautiful body. The hickeys on his chest were flaring red, your eyes trailing down to see his cock fully hard again.

"You've been having fun while I was away, baby?" he purred, dipping his fingers on your core to then push the pads of his fingers over your swollen clit, covering it with your arousal.

"F-fun?" you squeaked pathetically.

"Fucking yourself with your toys, with your hands... thinking of someone who isn't me, perhaps?" he cocked his head to one side.

You paused, feeling your heart sink down to your stomach. And before you could grasp at the evident trap in his question, another harsh slap landed right on your clit.

"No, no!" you replied as quickly as you could. "I'd never do that!"

"Mn? Then how have you been bad, baby?" he asked, pinching your clit with his fingers, giving it pulsating pinches over and over before delivering another slap.

The intense feeling your pussy suffered made you convulse. "Fuck! That's too much, baby," you said in a fucked out tone, recoiling when he swiftly slapped your clit again.

"That's not my name, bunny," he growled, a devilish smirk appearing on his face.

"Sorry," you slurred out.

"Did you imagine someone else playing with this pussy, baby?" he continued with his little game of questions, his honeyed voice sending a chill through your body.

"No! I wouldn't—I'd never," you gasped pathetically, your legs beginning to shake from the lack of support.

"Did you wish someone else fucked you?"

The ghost of a smirk crowned his lips, the studded eyebrow twitching up slightly when you didn't answer. You held in a breath when you saw Joshua grabbing his cock with one hand, guiding it to your entrance.

A pathetic mewl spilled from your lips when he sheathed his cock inside you in one go, holding your legs with his arms, hands parked on your hips as he fucked you slowly at first.

"Oh, god," you sighed, the bite of his cock stretching your walls felt mind-numbingly good that you barely had any control over yourself.

"What's that, bunny?" he gasped, the features of his face riddled with pleasure too.

"Josh," you whimpered, rendered utterly useless, all you could focus on was his cock, stretching your walls like nothing else. "Please, faster, fuck me faster, please."

Joshua blinked slowly at you, there was no denying the love in his eyes. But he didn't give you what he wanted, he continued to push his cock inside you slowly, enjoying the pulsating of your walls around him from all the pleasure building up, anticipating another climax.

"Do you want someone else playing with what's mine?" he asked in a hollow tone, his usual sweetness robbed by the strain and the focus he kept over the calculated pace of his thrusts.

You felt your brow furrowing in confusion, a light gasp leaving your mouth before you could even think of a response.

"Did you miss me, princess?" he asked, his movements picking some speed, fucking you with shallow thrusts, testing you before starting to plow on you mercilessly.

The change was so sudden you were snapped from your quiet confusion.

"Yes, Josh! O-of course," you gasped, your hands searching for something to hold onto. His thrusts became so brutal that your entire body was pushed on your bed, making your tits bounce and your breath catch.

"Mmn," he hummed before letting a puffy sigh out of his lips, then he tilted his head back, eyelids fluttering as he moaned deeply. "Fuuuck," he rasped as he came inside you with hard thrusts, his mouth parting slightly.

A chill coursed through you. Joshua didn't care if you came with him, or before him, he emptied himself inside you without a warning, his face torn with pleasure as he did so. And even if you felt close to your own climax, you couldn't care less as well.

Joshua stopped pushing his cock inside you, shuddering slightly when he pulled out of you not a minute after. His cum dripped out of you helplessly, leaving a warm trail as it slid slowly from your entrance.

"God, baby, you're so messy," he reproached with a soft tone.

"Mm?" you cluelessly looked at him. "Fuck!" you gasped when his fingers swiftly picked up his own cum, pushing it back to your core.

Then he took his long fingers between your lips, inserting them into your mouth. You tasted the salt of his cum and your own arousal, making you inhale deeply because of the sudden intrusion of his fingers deep in your tongue.

"Good girl," he whispered, pulling out his two fingers to dip them into your fluttering core again.

"Josh," you mewled, squirming when the pads of his fingers played with the cum dripping out from you.

"Shhh," he shushed you softly, taking his fingers to your mouth again, smiling when you sucked them clean diligently. "You're being such a good girl right now. So good for me."

"Babe," you breathed out when you were able to speak again. "God, Joshua," his fingers were inside you again, pushing his cum back into your cunt, massaging your walls in the process.

"Yes, bunny?" he replied when you called his name. "What do you want?"

"More," you mewled pathetically. "Please."

You had realized that his other hand was working on himself, his fist pumping his cock slowly, getting himself hard at the sight of you dripping in cum, tears, drool, legs shaking, asking for more.

Joshua tilted his head slightly to one side. "More?" he smiled cheekily, introducing a third finger inside you.

"Joshua," you whined over the squelching sounds caused by his fingers plunging in and out of you. "Don't tease me."

But he continued pushing his fingers in, the pads of his fingers pressing on your front walls, making you squirm in the bed, a hand scrunching on the covers of your bed.

"Please?" you gasped lewdly. "Please, Josh, you know what I want, please."

Joshua tilted his head back, cocking the studded eyebrow, looking at you with so much awe, smiling mischievously when you started pleading for more. His fist continued pumping on his cock, picking up some speed that made him take a deep breath, resisting his own pleasure to tease you some more.

"Joshua, please!" you whined, trying to resist the intense feeling that his fingers pushing on your wall caused, thinking that he was aiming to get you to tap out.

But you resisted, though, marveling over the controlled movements of his body, how he kept the pace of his hands steady, without pausing to rest.

"God, Joshua!" you yelped loudly when his fingers shifted, pressing on the right spot, causing you to flinch. Your other hand flew to hold onto your bed covers too.

"Yeah? Right there?" he asked, to then bite on his lower lip, watching you as you continued to writhe desperately, moaning for more.

"Please, please," you mewled over and over, now pleading for him to continue massaging on your glorious spot.

Joshua showed you a wolfish grin when you quickly switched your pleas. "You're gonna come, baby?" he purred with a mocking tone. "Aw, over some fingers? And here I thought you were begging to have my cock."

"Josh, please, god, please," you breathed, your jaw going slack when the plunging of his fingers inside you turned more forceful.

You cried out pathetically, screwing your eyes shut to let some tears run down your temples. A spurt of warm liquid came out of you, making you whimper dramatically and open your eyes to see his hand covered in your mess.

"You're making a mess, baby," Joshua sighed in awe while watching you squirt on his hand.

He grabbed his own t-shirt that was discarded on one corner of your bed and gently pressed it against your skin, cleaning all traces of his and your arousal.

"Mmph," you hummed with a sigh, propping up your body with your elbows on your bed. "Joshua, please. Fuck me, pl-please, fuck me."

He tossed the ruined t-shirt to a corner of your bedroom and nodded at the bed. "Move back for me, baby," he instructed, climbing on the bed after you.

His hands reached out to grab your legs by the back of your knees, pulling your body to the middle of the bed with a yank. Then Joshua pushed your legs up to your chest, thighs squeezing your tits as he leaned over you.

"Joshua, please, no teasing," you pleaded when he grabbed his cock with one hand, running the tip across your wet folds to see the reaction on your face when he pushed the tip in your entrance slowly.

"Tell me you want it," he said, his studded eyebrow quirking up slightly.

"I want it, Joshua," you replied instantly. "Please, I want it."

"Tell me you want me," he growled, pushing his cock inside you, inch by inch, stuffing you full, but ever so slowly.

"Please!" you gasped, sounding pathetic, your hands searching his shoulders to hold onto him, to urge him completely inside you. "I want you, Joshua, please, please."

Joshua pushed his chest against the back of your thighs, slipping his length inside you to his hilt. His hands shifted on your sides, one to support his own weight and the other to grab your chin, forcing your eyes on him.

"Gah,"you choked up, tears brimming in your eyes when he started pushing his cock inside you, his thrusts fucking you deeper than ever before. "Joshua, Joshua..."

"Yeah, baby. That's my name," he groaned softly, his brow furrowing with some strain. His hand left your chin, his fingers curling on the bed covers, as if he were trying with all of his strength not to lose his control on you.

"Hmmn," you mewled when he instantly reached a spot inside you that made pleasure course through your whole body like a bolt of lightning.

"Do you like how I make you feel?" he said through a raspy breath.

You felt the features of your face contort with the confusion that flashed in your mind, but you nodded nonetheless. "Yeah, it's you, Josh," you mewled. "It's all you."

Joshua kept his thrusts steady, fucking you deep and slowly. His eyes trained on your face as you continued to breath out lewd moans, your mouth parted, eyebrows knitted.

"That's my girl," he praised, a grunt coiling in his throat as his thrusts became more desperate. "My girl."

"Yours," you whispered entrancingly. "I'm yours only, Josh."

"You're mine," he blurted with a ragged breath.

You nodded, unable to utter a word. His thrusts were robbing the air out of you, ramming his cock in, plunging inside you so hard that you were reduced to lewd gasps, hot tears spilling from your eyes.

Joshua screwed his eyes shut for a second, a sharp breath leaving him as his hips slammed into your body, for a second that was all you heard, the sounds of skin slapping together combined with your ragged gasps, the sound of your bed creaking as he kept fucking you into the mattress.

A vein had started to pop on his forehead, his eyes were glistening but he kept them trained on yours. The beautiful features of his face went lax with lust, making him moan, the sound reverberating against your body.

For a second, you just looked at each other, so mad for each other, there were no words either of you could exchange to express what you felt.

"Bunny," he gasped with urgency. "Come for me."

You nodded, a hand searching his face, cupping his chin as you slowly gave into the pleasure blooming inside your body. Joshua turned to kiss the palm of your hand, a gesture so tender that betrayed the animalistic pace to which he was fucking you, making you his.

"I'm coming, 'm—Joshua!" you gasped as you came undone under him, pleasure flooding inside you, taking over every part of your body. Your orgasm hit you so hard you even felt it on your face, tingling in your cheeks, making you close your eyes.

Until you heard a gasp, Joshua came inside you a couple of seconds after you, emptying himself with shallow thrusts. But he didn't relent there, he lowered your legs immediately, clashing his mouth on yours.

Joshua eased his body on top of you, pressing his chest against yours to kiss you deeply, moaning in your mouth as he stopped thrusting his cum inside you sloppily.

Chests heaving, you wrapped him in your arms as he appeared to be blinking slowly, dropping his head in the crook of your neck to come down off his high. His weight was almost crushing you, but you welcomed the pressure from it, the warmth, the scent of his hair and his skin.

You ran the pads of your fingers on the line of his back, feeling him shudder hard but didn't protest against it. "I love you," you whispered.

Joshua didn't respond at first, he continued breathing hard on the curve where your jawline and your neck meet, pressing languid kisses on your skin every two seconds.

His hand crept up from your cheek to the back of your head, then he shifted on top of you to give you a shallow kiss on your lips. "I love you too, bunny."

You were a mess, your skin pricked where your tears had left a trail, your limbs were shaking beneath his weight, you felt a wet tingle where his and your body met.

"You were so good, baby," he whispered, his thumb caressing your cheek as he continued giving you shallow kisses. "Let me take care of you now, okay?" he pulled out of you, drawing a small groan from your mouth.

What happened next was nothing out of routine for you. He started the shower and carried you in bridal style, being that your legs were still shaking badly.

When you got back to the bedroom, he offered himself to towel dry your hair after you put on your bunny pyjamas. So you were sitting on the bed, Joshua was carefully pressing a towel around your hair for some minutes until you looked over your shoulder, and told him to stop.

He looked so tired, but focused on drying your hair, brushing it with his long fingers with so much care, sighing deeply.

"Baby, let's go to sleep, okay?" you offered sweetly.

"Yeah, okay," he whispered, getting up from your bed to discard the towel.

"I threw your t-shirt in the washing machine," you informed him as you crawled beneath the bed covers on your designated side of the bed.

You looked at your boyfriend, crossing the bedroom to slide his body beside yours, immediately wrapping his arms around you to pull you closer to him.

"Thank you, sweetheart," he said tiredly.

You pressed your chest against him, reaching his pouty lips with your own for a tender kiss. "You don't have to thank me for that," you sighed, caressing his cheekbones with your fingertips. "Maybe you should consider leaving some clothes here. If you want to, obviously."

He pulled back slightly, eyeing you with curiosity. "O-okay, I will," he smiled softly.

For a second, you marveled at the sight of him and returned the smile.

"Or you could also consider moving in, when you get back from work. If... you want to," you breathed nervously, your eyes shifting from his face, unable to keep them locked with his.

Joshua didn't reply as fast as you initially thought he would. You almost thought you had said something crazy, something so insanely out of place for you that had left him speechless.

But he just looked at you fondly. A small sigh left him when his smile broadened.

"I'd love that, baby," he replied warmly.

"Okay," you whispered, reaching for his lips again.

What you intended for a sweet and tender kiss turned into a deep, hungry one in a matter of seconds. Joshua grunted in your mouth, a hand cupping your cheek as his tongue lapped on your lower lip, making you sigh a moan.

"Marry me," he blurted, his lips brushing yours in the process.

You laughed lazily in his mouth. "Okay."

"I mean it," he breathed, kissing the apple of your cheek, your eyelid, then an eyebrow, littering kisses all over your face.

"Baby," you protested. "You need to calm down."

"No," he growled, cupping your cheek with one hand. "I'm crazy about you. I want you with me in every way possible."

"Sleep first, baby boy," you teased. "We'll talk about it tomorrow."

Joshua rolled his eyes at your teasing, but he leaned in, giving you a soft kiss before you turned your back to his chest for him to hug you, fitting his body to the shape of yours.

You exhaled, pleased with the warmth exuding from his half naked body cuddling you, an arm over your waist, his breath caressing your neck, until,

"Baby," Joshua called softly, drawing a breath through his nose that denoted how tired he really was. "Would you feel better if you came along with me? On tour?"

"What are you talking about?" you asked, turning over on the bed to look at his face.

Joshua repositioned his head beneath his fist, lying now on his side. His free hand searched yours to lace his fingers with you. "I know with me being so busy, traveling and working, I've been making you feel a little neglected. I don't want to make you feel like this, I..." he looked to the corner of the room mindlessly, gathering his thoughts. "I want you close to me."

There were dark circles under his eyes, his lips were slightly chapped on the corners. But he kept his gaze trained on your face, there was a gentle calmness in him, just as the night he asked you to be his wife.

"We live very different lives, Josh," you whispered carefully, selecting your words. "I can't move around while writing a book. I kind of need stability to work."

"I don't want you to feel lonely," he said, his voice breaking a little when he uttered the last word.

"Well, then we just have to find a way we can make this work," you muttered softly. "I know that you don't want to make me feel neglected but your actions say the opposite."

"I know," he whispered, nodding with his head slowly. "I'm going to fix it, I promise."

"I'm going to need more than that, Josh," you mumbled, a small, cheeky smile appearing on your face.

His big dark eyes looked worried a second before he caught on your playfulness. "Yeah? And what would that be?"

"I'm going to need about a hundred kisses from you," you replied, your heart crushing over the smile that drew on his face.

"Just a hundred?" he taunted, his hand leaving yours and finding the crook of your neck, holding you gently as he leaned over your face to press a soft kiss, after the other, humming happily.

"Maybe two hundred."

"I can do more," he mumbled with a singsong tone.

"Three thousand, then."

Joshua chuckled breathily. "We're from hundreds to thousands that quickly?"

"Only if you want me to forgive you," you replied playfully between his tender kisses that he pressed against your lips.

"What else do you want?" he mumbled, his sweet voice laced with some raspiness.

"I want french toast for breakfast tomorrow," you said after a long moment of thought.

"You got it, Ms. Hong," he replied with a small smile, looking at you with such tenderness that you almost felt like sobbing. "What else?"

"I want you to take me out for a date," you said, now your tone sounding meek and tiny. "You're all talk with the Ms. Hong thing, but haven't taken me on an official date, yet, Mr. Hong."

"I will take you on a date," he muttered between kisses that were turning into more prolonged ones. "On several dates. For the rest of your life."

You cupped his cheek with one hand, and he ceased his shower of kisses to look into your eyes.

"I want you, Joshua," you whispered, trying to convey all your love into a couple of words.

"I want you too, bunny," he replied, his voice rendered into a mere whisper. "Forever."

✮ LONG AUTHOR'S NOTE READ IT 🗣️

hi there my lovelies!! ε(｡•᎑•`)っ♡

WE MADE IT! so let me tell you all a little story. when i started writing city lights, i only intended to write four chapters. but some of you guys convinced me to make it longer and i could write 8 chapters in total!! and i'm so glad i did cause i love writing long fics (as you probably noticed)

chapter 8 got soooo long and i'm sorry for having to split it haha. i guess introducing another main character into the mix does that huh? but there was sooooo many things i left out from this one! maybe i'll write them in the future!

I WILL BE POSTING A FINAL CHAPTER TO CITY LIGHTS SOON, but i would like you to take this chapter as the wrap up for the main story, given that the next chapter will be taking a turn for the dynamic between joshua and bunny. does that make sense? 👀

okay that's it for me. i love you all, drink water, use sunscreen, take your vitamins, your birth control pills or whatever it is that you do, take care of yaselves, i love youuuuuu ◕⩊◕

toodles

part 9

buy me a coffee? 🩵👉🏻👈🏻

✮ warnings: alcohol consumption (no dubcon), smut with plot, dom joshua, brat reader, reader is on the pill, foul language, dirty talk, unprotected p in v sex, creampies [a lot of these], cumplay, spit play, oral sex (m, f), multiple orgasms, phone sex, guided masturbation, use of sex toys (rabbit vibrator), sextapes, manhandling, quickie, anal play, praise/degradation kink, breeding kink, exhibitionism: sex in semi public spaces, brat taming: spanking, bondage (belt); pet names: sweetheart, princess, baby, bunny (hers) handsome, baby, babe, baby boy (his)

✮ this was proofread by the amazingly talented @cvntrlseecvntrlvee thank you for helping me with ideas, and for being there to witness drunk v writing that quickie hehe

✮ disclaimer: minors dni this post is intended for 18+ readers ONLY. please have your age stated in your description and try not to look like a bot please 🙂.

part viii — part one

The ride back home was characterized by an unpleasant silence, only interrupted by your crying. It wasn't a loud, snotty weeping, you just kept silently gathering tears, sobbing every now and then. 

But your boyfriend's best friend noticed. Every time you brought your hand to wipe away tears with the sleeve of your sweater, you'd feel his swift gaze on you as he kept driving. 

"Do you want to grab some food? Are you okay?" Yoon Jeonghan asked once, his tone tentative and cautious. 

"I'm fine," you smiled sheepishly. "I'm okay. I'm just a bit of a crybaby." 

"Oh, don't say that," he responded calmly. "You're allowed to cry, it's okay." 

You laughed meekly. "Is this a good first impression?" you wondered out loud. "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about that," he said while eyeing you with a polite smile on his face. "You know, Joshua asked me to get you home, but I also wanted to meet you ever since he told me about you," he mentioned briefly and with a simple tone. 

You turned to see the man you knew almost nothing about. "He's told you about me?" 

Jeonghan scrambled for words. You noticed his shifty eyes and when he parted his lips, "I, uh, don't wanna get myself in trouble," he chuckled embarrassedly. "He just told me that he was seeing someone." 

You narrowed your eyes, spotting his clear lie but decided not to press. 

"You need to understand—Joshua has never been this serious with anyone in the years I've known him," he told you, eyeing you and the road. "And I've known him for a long time. So when he told me that he was serious about you... I knew I had to meet you." 

"I find that hard to believe, him being single for years. I know, he's told me but," you pointed with a small laugh. "I mean, Joshua is..." 

Jeonghan shifted a little in his seat. "Yeah, yeah, I know. Eyebrow piercing, emo boy, hard to resist," he chuckled. "Yes, that guy, single. I guess he's told you that he had some flings here and there but never committed." 

"He doesn't–hasn't told me much about his past relationships," you told your boyfriend's best friend. "We actually don't talk about that, either his or my own past relationships." 

"That's fair," he hummed, shifting the grip on the steering wheel to one hand, while he decided to rest the other on the windowsill. "But don't think that there's some tragic backstory, or whatever that's made him like this. Shuji was always set on growing his musical career before chasing someone." 

You stifled a laugh. "Suppose I got lucky, then." 

"Maybe you both are just lucky," he muttered, eyes set on the road ahead.

"So how did you two meet?" you wondered. "If you don't mind me asking."

"We met through another friend," he eyed you curiously. "Choi Seungcheol, you've met him?"

"I don't think I have, no," you frowned and then your mouth parted. "Oh! Is it the bar owner?"

Jeonghan nodded. "That's the one," he gave you an amused smile. "Now the story of how we actually met is something I decidedly shouldn't tell you," he chuckled again and darted a look at you. "Ask your boyfriend."

"Why, is it bad?" you asked innocently.

"No, not bad. Nothing is bad if you have a good excuse," he let out a low cackle. "It was a really fun night. I lost a lot of money," he coughed a bit, steering the wheel with one hand.

"Mmph, that only generates more questions, you know," you scoffed and he only gave you a grin in response.

"Your turn, then," he looked at you when the car stopped at a red light. "How did you meet Joshuji? Of course, if that's a story you would like to share."

Joshuji. Your stomach twisted at the sound of the fond nickname.

"I uh, I have really bad sleeping habits," you started with some shyness, but there was something in the nature of your boyfriend's best friend. He seemed inviting and familiar.

"Ah, really?" his eyebrows shot up.

You nodded, continuing: "I went to his door one day to tell him to stop playing his guitar because I couldn't sleep, thinking it was really early in the morning to be playing on speakers," you chuckled awkwardly. "Turns out that it was well past noon. And I was still in pjs, sleep deprived and cranky."

"Mmmn," he nodded with thought. "I have bad sleep habits too."

"Oh no, I'm sorry to hear that," you replied pitifully.

"Don't be. I'm used to it," he replied quickly, drawing in a breath before he pulled to the curb. "And there you go, Ms. Hong. Arrived home safe."

"Thank you for the ride," you smiled, gathering your bearings and before you could step out of his fancy car you turned to see the man. "Let me compensate you in some way."

His eyebrows pushed up. "I'm sorry?"

"Yeah, let me buy you lunch or so-something," you replied shyly. "I owe you."

He snorted a laugh. "Ever heard of friends? You owe me nothing."

You looked away, trying to hide the evident shame you felt and probably showed in your face. "I also want to know more about you... and Joshua."

"Ah, then you should've said it like that," he tutted, a smile threatening to break on his face. "Lunch is alright."

The first weekend went by slowly.

Thankfully, you had a lot of work to bury yourself in, such as signing books, preparing and green lighting stuff for the book promotions. You were surprised to see that your agency had secured you round a of interviews, so you had to prepare for that too.

One morning you were returning to your apartment, a bag of fresh groceries in your arms, when you saw a tall man standing outside your door. Your stomach twisted at the sight, and your first instinct was to think of Joshua, even if that was quite improbable.

But the man faced the door, and you caught sight of his sharp nose and slightly curly dark hair hiding beneath a black beanie. You suddenly realized that you'd seen this man before, and it was your neighbor.

"Hi," you chirped, making the man turn to you now. "Seokmin, right?"

"Hi, there," he gave you a toothy grin. "That's right. I'm just here to drop by some things that Joshua left in our old apartment. Is it alright if I drop them with you?"

"Yeah, of course," you replied, noticing the cardboard box in his arm. You reached to open up the door and stepped inside. "You can leave it on the table, it's fine."

"Thanks," he muttered. "That's all he left behind, that's it for me. Have a nice day!"

And with that, you were barely uttering a phrase in goodbye when Seokmin walked out your door, turning down to the elevator instead to what used to be Joshua's apartment. A hollow feeling invaded you when it dawned on you that the place was finally empty now.

With a long sigh, you closed your door and turned to the box on the table. You decided to pry inside it, to find some pillowcases neatly folded, a bottle of shampoo, a black cap, sunglasses, a protein shaker and a pair of training gloves.

You gave yourself the freedom to empty the box and find a place for these items in your bedroom. Joshua had left two large sound amplifiers in your apartment already, so you saw no reason why you shouldn't find somewhere to keep his other stuff.

You were just leaving the bottle of shampoo in the shower when you caught the tangy smell of citrus, like fresh lemonade or the tangerine splash when you peel off the juicy fruit. It instantly reminded you of the smell of Joshua's hair, the smell you swore lingers in the pillow he used the last time he slept with you.

Joshua had been gone for two days, and you were getting by just fine. He called once a day and texted whenever he could. But the truth was that he kept busy, and had little time to even catch up with you.

So in an attempt to distract yourself from the gut wrenching feeling you got from missing him, you went into your room and lay down on the bed, scrolling mindlessly on your phone.

That's when you were reminded of the videos Joshua had sent the night he arrived at his hotel room. He made no comment about it, just dropped them in the conversation he shared with you and you hadn't had the opportunity to watch them. Until now.

The videos Joshua sent you were of the last night you had sex with him. One video started and the first thing that caught your eye was your face. Your heart sank at the first glimpse of what his view was when he fucked you: the camera flash hit your eyes and you grimaced slightly, but you could see in the video, despite it all, your lust-blown eyes looking at him expectantly.

It was the first time you saw yourself in this position. Lying face up to him, your head in the pillows, hair spread all over them. In that second, you could feel yourself heating up when you saw yourself like this. And your arms were framing your head and your wrists, god—bound by rope tightly and tied up to your headboard. Joshua's hand came into the frame, and the angle of the camera shifted down to your naked body, thus showing his.

A burning sensation rushed inside you when you saw his cock, fully hard, as Joshua gripped it in his hand. He kept his thumb on top of his veiny, thick shaft. Your mouth watered as you saw him guiding it to your core.

A desperate need to feel what your eyes were watching overwhelmed you so badly that you had to pause the video and put your phone down. You were surprised at the response of your body, your accelerated heart, the excitedness coursing through your veins, buzzing in your ears. You knew you had to do something about it.

You felt your pulse beneath your hot skin as you tugged your shorts down with one hand, dragging your wet panties along and finished taking them off by kicking them with your feet.

Pushing your knees up, you parted your thighs slightly, only to sneak one hand in and let out a sigh upon feeling just how wet you were already.

Your free hand scrambled in your bed, blindly searching for your phone and you tapped play to resume watching Joshua's hand, guiding his pretty cock inside you. The reddened cockhead nudged in your entrance—just as your fingers glided in your wetness, your mind went blank, subdued by the need to recreate what you felt that night.

"Fuck," Joshua muttered when he sheathed himself completely inside you, his voice sounded soft in the video, making you shudder in ecstasy as your fingers toyed with your clit.

The first video ended there. But the next one was even dirtier. As you continued rubbing your clit, your eyes watched Joshua's point of view, as he fucked you slowly. You saw his cock disappearing inside you, and then pulling back out, glistening wet from his arousal and your own.

The faces you made, the noises that escaped your parted lips, your lust-lidded eyes as you kept them trained on him. You remembered then that you were getting more aroused by seeing his own enjoyment, the pleasure he got from having you bound to your bed.

You also heard his breathing through the video, though you couldn't see his face. You ached to see him, to feel him again as the second video came to an end.

The videos were on loop as you worked on your poor throbbing pussy and you came while watching them over and over again. You felt pathetic, tired, furiously needy, and you know a couple of videos wouldn't suffice.

"Joshua, Joshua..." you chanted until your voice was hoarse, your body twitching in your bed.

You had tossed your phone on the pillow beside your head, only getting by the memory of him fucking you, and the sound of the low grunts caught on the video. You touched yourself until your fingers were worn, your poor pussy so wet you couldn't even touch your clit properly without the pads of your fingers slipping.

A chilling shudder shook your body when your phone started buzzing beside your head. You turned to look at the pop-up tab above the video of your boyfriend fucking you. Only to see that he was calling you.

"He-hello?" you croaked and cleared your throat. "Hi."

"Hi, bunny," your boyfriend sighed contentedly. "Am I interrupting something?"

You moved your hand from between your legs and rested it on top of your lower tummy.

"No, not at all," you lied and your voice betrayed you completely.

"Sure, baby? I can call later. I just got to the hotel room and was thinking of catching up with you," he hummed happily, you heard him groan when you assumed by the noise at the other end that he just threw himself onto a bed.

"I'm fine, Josh," you sighed, thinking of what to say. "Ha-how was your day?"

"Are you sick, baby? You sound a little hoarse–,"

"I'm okay," you gulped nervously and closed your eyes shamefully: "I was watching the videos you sent me."

Joshua paused for a second only. "Oh, my sweet girl, you should've just said that," he cooed and you knew by his tone that he was smiling: "Were you touching yourself, baby?"

"I–," you choked out nervously. "Yeah."

"Don't let me stop you, sweetheart," he purred with his honeyed voice and you squeezed your eyes, shaking with a violent shudder that demanded you to continue pleasuring yourself.

"Joshua," you blurted, your voice high and shaky. "I need you."

"What do you need from me, baby? Sounds like you were at it for quite some time, am I right?" he said tauntingly.

"I need you Josh,—I can't anymore," you mumbled coyly.

"You can't what, baby?" he asked, sounding amused and when you didn't give him an immediate reply, he just assumed. "Did you tease that pretty pussy until you can't come anymore?"

"Can you help me? Please Josh," you sighed pathetically, trying to ignore the throbbing of your walls.

"Get your rabbit dildo," he instructed without skipping a beat.

That drew a triumphant grin from you, getting up from your bed you walked to your dresser, where you kept your toys inside a box and got the vibrator. "How did you know I wasn't using my toys?"

"A feeling," he hummed sweetly. "Did you like the videos, baby?"

You settled back in your bed, dildo in one hand, phone in the other pressing against your ear. "Yeah, I did. I wish you recorded for longer, though."

"Maybe I did it on purpose," he replied in a low tone. "Maybe I just wanted you to have a little reminder."

"But I want more," you whined with a pout, knowing that the whiny tone in your voice would work on him. "I need you so bad, Joshua."

"Turn it on," he purred and you carried out his order immediately. When he heard the faint buzzing of your vibrator, he added: "I miss you too, baby. You have no idea. I miss you. I miss your lips. I want you to kiss me more when we make love, will you do that, baby?"

"Ye-yeah, Josh," you stammered. "I will do anything you want me to."

"Mm, baby, you're so good," he sighed softly. "So fucking good to me. Put the tip in, bunny—slowly."

"Mmnah," you moaned as soon as the tip came into contact with your throbbing pussy and you pushed in, slowly as he indicated, but then the slow thrusting motion of the dildo made you squirm a little. "Joshua–,"

"Don't push it all the way in, not yet," he directed, knowing full well that you would do just as he said. So you didn't let the shaft go all the way into the additional part of the dildo that would massage your clit.

"Josh," you sighed, biting back a moan as the slow thrusting of the dildo worked on your pussy. But still, it was not enough.

"I also miss the way you feel around me," he said with a low groan and you shuddered again, delighting over the fact that he too was aroused. "You feel... You feel like nothing else, baby. So fucking addictive."

"Are you–, are you touching yourself too, Josh?" you asked with a high-keen pitch.

"Mm, yeah. I am baby," he purred softly and your body responded with an ecstatic shudder. The truth is he got hard the moment he knew you were playing with yourself.

So there he was, sprawled in his hotel bed, completely naked, cock in his hand languidly pumping himself. "I need you too, bunny. Need to feel you."

You let out a whiny moan in response, feeling like his words were doing more work on your body than the dildo thrusting inside your walls slowly and rhythmically. "Fuck," you whispered. "I need to feel you too, Josh. It–it's not the same."

"Of course it's not the same, bunny," he groaned softly and you heard a soft sigh that resembled a smile. "Does my sweet girl miss my cock?"

You swallowed hard. "Ye-yeah. I miss you, Josh."

"That's not what I asked," he toyed, a small smile on his face as he rolled his hand around his reddened cockhead, smearing his shaft with precum to keep pumping slowly.

"I miss your cock. I need you inside me, need you to fuck me," you blurted out uncontrollably.

Joshua swallowed back a moan upon hearing you talk like that. And you got a taste of what he felt whenever you moaned in his ear when a low, raspy hum poured into your ear and your inner thighs clenched instantly.

"Close your eyes and push the dildo further, turn up the speed for me," you responded with a loud moan when you did. "Just let yourself go. Imagine it's me, can you do that, baby?"

"God, Josh," you moaned as your inner thighs started to shake slightly. You tried to imagine him, inside you instead of the vibrator, and its mechanical thrusting.

"I'm here, sweetheart," he murmured with a low raspy voice that only made your walls throb desperately. "God, I miss your needy pussy too. Always so wet and tight for me, sucking my cock back in. So fucking good, baby."

At that, you felt your walls flutter around the vibrator. Joshua knew how much you loved hearing him talk like that, his honeyed, worn voice pouring into your ear, making your body burn in pure delight. You could only give him a mewling sound in response.

"Yeah, I like hearing that," he said with a low rasp.

"Mmnf–fuck. Josh, I need more," you blurted impatiently when you were just at the edge, but needed more friction in your clit, needed to feel stuffed full. "Can I, babe?"

A pause.

"What did you just call me, baby?" he asked, his voice taut and almost breaking at the end. His lips raised in a smirk and pressed the phone to his ear to listen to your ragged breathing.

"Babe," you sighed a moan, no longer able to contain yourself, your legs twitching involuntarily.

"Fuck," Joshua blurted out in a mere a whisper. His mind reeled with an ecstatic shudder when he realized how much he loved hearing you call him that.

You could've smiled at that if it weren't for the desperate need for release. "Please I need more," you pressed. "Ca-can I go faster?"

"Mmn," a long hum, raw and almost inaudible. His hand gripped his cock tighter, now pumping himself faster. "Yeah, bunny. Go all the way in. Go faster too."

You pushed the dildo inside you with a blissful sigh. "Thank you, babe," you moaned and switched the speed to the one that would get you to come. "God, I need you, Josh."

"Yeah, baby?" he grunted slightly and then he sighed out when he felt his chest cave in. "I need you too. I miss your body and your warmth..."

Your mind had gone blank the minute the rabbit ears of the dildo started rubbing your clit, at the same time that the shaft increased the speed of the steady thrusts.

"Josh, I'm close, baby," you whimpered, lifting your hips from the bed slightly, rolling them as your orgasm drew nearer.

"God," Joshua gasped and swallowed back a moan. "I know you want me to talk dirty right now, baby, but I really fucking miss you."

"I miss you too, Josh," you squeezed your eyes shut, your jaw going slack as your sweet high took over your body, making you moan loudly.

"Fuck, fuck. I'm close too," he breathed, his fist pumping on his cock faster. "Keep doing that, baby. I need to hear you."

"Mmn, Josh," you whimpered lewdly, arching your back on the bed, letting the fiery pleasure consume you at last, crying out in pleasure, walls clenching erratically around the rabbit dildo.

"Joshua," you sobbed. "Baby, I love you."

An ecstatic feeling flooded inside him. A raspy moan coiled in Joshua's throat and he screwed his eyes shut, letting a shaky exhale out as his orgasm spilled all over his hand and abdomen, slowly pumping himself until the last spurts of cum came out of him.

"I love you too, bunny," he replied with a shy murmur.

You turned off the vibrator letting the gentle aftershocks of your orgasm run through your body. "Did you come because I told you that I love you, Josh?" you realized.

"Yeah," he replied and groaned slightly upon hearing your adorable laugh. "Don't laugh at me."

"You're cute," you cooed and then you mimicked him, almost getting his honeyed tone to a point: "Do you like hearing me say that, baby?"

"Of course I do, bunny," he replied with a hint of feigned annoyance. "I think I won't ever get tired of hearing you say it."

"Ever?" you asked, pressing your ear to the phone to hear him sigh and you just knew he was smiling.

"Yeah, I know it sounds cheesy but, I really like when you talk sweet to me," he said with a shy, breathy chuckle.

"Mm, I'll do it more often," you grinned. "You might get sick of me."

"I promise you, I won't," he asserted. "D'you feel better now, baby?"

"Yeah," you exhaled, a gloomy feeling falling upon you. "But I'm sad you're not here to care for me afterwards."

Joshua gave you a disgruntled sound. "I know, I know. But I still need you to do what we normally would do together, okay?" he asked softly and your gut twisted over imagining his eyebrows knitting.

"Mmn, but you're not here to cuddle me," you reproached some more.

"Baby," he pressed firmly.

"Okay, okay," you conceded.

"How about this: we go wash and I'll call you again?" he offered with a softer tone now.

"Mmh yeah, I'd like that," you murmured. And with that, you went and washed your hands thoroughly, and cleaned the vibrator, neatly placing it back to where you kept it.

Afterwards, Joshua videocalled you. And as you talked, you started to feel better, as if the nostalgic feeling was a mere afterthought now. Joshua talked about the city he was in, the hotel room he was staying in and the excitement he felt about his upcoming show.

You have no recollection of when you fell asleep, only that you woke up the following day with a message from Joshua that read: "You've fallen asleep, baby… I hope you don't mind if I keep an eye on you for a few minutes. Before I go to sleep. I love you, bunny."

Attached to that message, was a screenshot of you peacefully asleep, the angle twisted to what you assumed was your hand relaxing around your phone. But your face was in the frame, half buried in the pillow, mouth parted a little. And in the corner, the screenshot showed Joshua's face, smiling fondly at the sight of you. 

Yoon Jeonghan is a light sleeper.

That is one of the things that you learned about your boyfriend's best friend, during the time you've got to spend together. With Joshua being away for touring and recording sessions, Jeonghan has been there. Slowly, he has become a close friend of yours and he was pretty adamant on being friends. He was one of a kind in that, just a really good friend.

The night you learned he was a light sleeper was a fun night. You had been hate-watching a reality show together over wine and picking on a charcuterie board. Jeonghan had been visiting every few days now, either to watch a movie together or to silently piece together a Lego set.

"Mm, they're gonna kick him out next," Jeonghan asserted. His injured leg was propped up on the couch directly in front of him, a relaxed look on his face, probably from the alcohol.

"But he's the sweetest," you cooed, glossy eyed watching the screen.

"Yeah, that's why," he nodded, a bright look on his face.

You arched an eyebrow at him. Jeonghan was smart. And not only the book-smart kind of guy. He was a pretty good judge of character, just like yourself. But the theater director could read people like you could books.

"He's too sweet for this show, they let him play just enough to keep viewers hooked and will drop him to cause a bigger shock," he pointed one lithe finger to the screen with a devilish grin on his face.

You clicked your tongue. "You're a terrible viewer," you quipped, making his drowsy-lidded eyes turn to you. "You're getting ahead of the thing before it happens!"

Jeonghan scoffed. "Wanna bet?"

"No," you replied wearily with a pout and turned away sheepishly. "You've won all the bettings I've struck with you."

You heard him giggle. "You could win this one, come on, bet," he nodded to the TV.

"I think the pretty one will be kicked out next," you mused, a small smile bundling up your wine-warmed cheeks.

"Why?" Jeonghan stretched out the word. "She's the hottest one in this show!"

"Well, just like you said," you began. "She's pretty and is in love, so that's out for a show that wants to see them all bumping meats together."

"Bumping meats?" Jeonghan retorted and laughed.

"You know what I mean!" you whined.

"You're like an old lady sometimes," he cackled, bringing his vape pen between his lips and dragging in a puff, letting the smoke cascade out of his mouth.

"Stop smoking in my apartment, Yoon Jeonghan!" you squealed.

"Make me," he chuckled and dragged in another breath.

"You–" you cut yourself off before you could think of an insult and grabbed a cushion from the couch to throw it at his face when he laughed even harder at your shy expression.

The cushion hit him square in the face, but it also fell on top of his hand that was holding the wine glass, toppling it over the couch.

"Oop," you uttered, getting the glass before it fell from the seat and onto the floor. But your couch had already suffered all the damage.

"Oh, princess, I'm sorry," Jeonghan cooed immediately upon seeing the red wine stain settling in the seat of your white couch.

"No, no, it's alright," you mumbled, rising from the couch yourself to get a kitchen towel and coming back to press the dry cloth on it. "It's my fault."

You had knelt in front of the couch to press the kitchen towel to stop it from spreading more. Jeonghan was still sitting down, his knee brushed your arm slightly and he moved from it.

"You can bill me for the cleaning service," he assured, looking down as you still did a feeble attempt to do something.

"No, don't worry about it," you shook your head, the movement making you feel dizzy. "I won't let you."

Jeonghan's lips stretched into a smile slowly. "I don't care what you do, let me take care of it."

You narrowed your eyes at him. Jeonghan stared you down as well, pushing his black hair from the side of his face and tucking it behind his ear.

What broke your stare-down contest was the loud buzzing of your phone that had been long forgotten on the coffee table. You jolted slightly and turned from the man hovering above you and picked up the call.

"Hi, Josh," you cooed, eyeing your friend whose smile just got bigger.

"Baby, I'm facetiming you. Stop pressing the phone to your ear," Joshua laughed.

"Oh," you pulled the phone away and the man beside you scoffed a laugh. "Sorry."

Your boyfriend was lying back on the high pillows of the hotel room, his hair washed up and looking like he wasn't wearing a shirt.

"Do you have someone over?" Joshua frowned slightly. The videofeed in the corner showed the camera pointed at you, and in the background, you could see the coffee table with the charcuterie board, wine bottles and glasses. And Jeonghan's wallet, keys, phone and his vape pen.

"Jeongjeong is here," you nodded and pointed the phone to your boyfriend's best friend.

Jeonghan pressed two fingers to his forehead and saluted the camera with a small. "'Sup."

"What are you two guys doing?" was the first thing Joshua said, eliciting an alarming feeling that crawled down your neck.

Though his tone was simple and unsuspecting of anything, you felt nervous nonetheless. Joshua was quite the possessive boyfriend, but since he went away and you had been getting to know his best friend, he has never said anything negative about it.

"We're hate-watching this show," you started.

"We're in the middle of settling a bet!" Jeonghan interjected, making you chuckle out a drunk laugh.

"Are you drunk, sweetheart?" Joshua caught on immediately after that.

"A bit," you murmured, squinting with one eye and bringing up a hand to pinch two fingers in the air. Joshua smiled when you got to your feet and sat beside Jeonghan, on the side that wasn't spilled with wine. Now your video feed on the corner of your phone screen showed you and Jeonghan.

"What's your bet about now?" Joshua asked, watching you with an amused expression on his face.

"Jeonghan is just taking advantage of my poor financing skills," you slurred.

Jeonghan smirked and your boyfriend did too almost as if on cue.

"Don't let him win, baby," your boyfriend advised, but the tone he used with you made you discreetly tuck your lower lip behind your teeth.

"I'm gonna win again. Until you learn," the man beside you shrugged, brushing his shoulder against yours in the process.

Joshua rolled his eyes with a huff. You watched Jeonghan and back to the screen, feeling like you just missed out on the joke.

"Le-learn what?" you babbled.

"I always win," Jeonghan said with ease, making your boyfriend groan.

You gaped at him. "You're cocky," you rolled your eyes and shook your head at him. "Anyway, how are you, Josh?"

This was sort of a new tradition between you and your boyfriend now, he would facetime you and talk about your day, share thoughts and talk like this for at least an hour.

Joshua sucked in a breath slowly. "Tired," he exhaled. "It was a long session today," he said, his honeyed voice sounding worn.

You pouted slightly. Joshua had been recording with Midnight Haze for their first produced album. Every city they hit, they rent a studio and get to recording so they have to use their hours to finish recording their songs fast.

"Take care of yourself, Josh," you cooed, not caring to be openly affectionate with Jeonghan beside you.

"I'm alright, princess. I'm off to bed," he sighed tiredly but with a content look on his face. "You two continue to have fun, okay?"

"M'kay," you mumbled a bit deflated, you hated the days you couldn't get more time talking to him.

"But not too much fun," your boyfriend's mouth turned into a cheeky grin, the pierced eyebrow quirking up. "Not without me."

Jeonghan leaned on your shoulder, taking most of the frame of the camera. "Bye Joshuji," he chanted and waved with his hand.

"Take care," your boyfriend said, although in your state you understood it as don't drink more than you can handle, and nodded.

"Love you, Josh," you said with all the emotion you could muster without making your friend uncomfortable.

"I love you too, baby," he muttered warmly.

The video feed went out and you were met with your reflection on the screen, your eyes beginning to brim with tears as you tossed your phone on the coffee table.

"What?" Jeonghan blurted at that moment and you sniffed, so he went on: "What, what's going on? Why are you crying?"

You knew your tears were part from all the alcohol overpowering your emotions but you were suddenly overcome with a heart wrenching sadness, and worry.

"Oh no, not again," Jeonghan muttered and clicked his tongue. "Come here," he cooed warmly and wrapped an arm around your shoulders to pull you into a cozy embrace.

"I'm sorry," you stuttered between tears, sniffing loudly. "I just–,"

"I know, you don't need to say it," he muttered with a warm tone. "You miss him, you're getting second thoughts."

"I'm not having second thoughts," you frowned and looked at his eyes, drowsy over the alcohol.

"Really?" he pushed his eyebrows up and gave you a tipsy smile. "Really?"

You sent him a confused look. "I–, I've never said that–"

"You don't have to," he muttered. "I've listened to you and all I hear is you guiltripping yourself and then going on a fucking rabbit hole about not 'being good enough' and not telling him how you feel sooner and, honestly it's just–," he sighed.

Your eyebrows knitted involuntarily. "That's how I sound?"

"Yeah, kinda," he tilted his head side to side. "Listen, I know why you feel like this and I hear you but, I think you're more upset by not seeing him as frequently as you used to. Like a baby who just lost their favorite toy."

You laughed through your tears and Jeonghan responded with a sweet smile of his own. "That's mean, Jeongjeong," you muttered, reaching out for your glass of wine and the bottle, pouring a tiny bit more for you to sip.

"It's just how I see it," he gave you a tight squeeze with his arm before releasing you. "Would you feel better if you go and meet up with him?"

"Yeah, I know I would," you said, leaning your head back on the headrest and looking at the ceiling. "But we're not seeing each other for a couple of weeks. And he will not be able to make it to the book release party, so."

Jeonghan leaned his head back the same as you. You turned to see him, he was frowning slightly, his eyes out of focus. "What if I told you that I just got tickets for his show next Saturday?"

You snorted loudly, nearly choking on your saliva, an act fueled by alcohol. "What?"

"And I can also get you there without Joshua knowing, so it could be a surprise. Then you can talk to him about what's bothering you, " he shrugged and gave you a look. "Maybe even convince him to clear his schedule so he can be here."

"You're being oddly nice," you pointed, narrowing your eyes at him.

"Yeah, well don't get used to it," Jeonghan warned and then let out a sigh through a shy smile.

You sighed, looking at the big wine stain on your couch.

Somehow you couldn't bring yourself to care. You gathered your tears with the back of your hand, sniffing involuntarily before saying: "I want a burger," it was a sad declaration.

Jeonghan snorted. "Right now?" he raised his arm, the screen of his smartwatch lighting up from the movement. "It's one in the morning, I doubt we'll find anything open."

"Mm nah, forget it," you brushed off. "I'll get you another glass, hold on."

You slowly gathered your limbs but before you could get up, Jeonghan stopped you with one hand.

"Don't get up," he muttered quickly. "I can't drink more, I have to drive."

"You're leaving already?" you looked at the screen. "But we have to watch the season's finale."

Jeonghan directed his eyes at you. "Then I'll just drink from your glass, just don't get up. We can't both be disabled at the same time."

"I'm not that drunk," you slurred.

"Pfft, yeah right," he smiled and nodded at the flatscreen. "Let's keep watching."

You don't know how or when you fell asleep. You woke up disoriented, your head had fallen languidly from Jeonghan's shoulder, the abrupt awakening made your heart race and your mind reel with some lucidity.

Did you fall asleep on Jeonghan's shoulder?

He had fallen asleep too, his head leaning on the headrest, the features of his face were relaxed, his eyelids trembling slightly as he snored softly.

The screen was frozen, the faint buzzing sound from its electricity made you look for the remote and turn it off. You left the remote on the coffee table, your fingers bumped slightly with the empty glass of wine.

With that, Jeonghan woke up with a start. "Wha–what?" he mumbled sleepily, his arms stretching out into the air.

"We fell asleep," you mumbled, noticing in your speech how drunk you were still.

"Fuck, we did," he groaned, reaching for his phone on the coffee table.

"You can crash here," you offered. "I can bring you blankets and a decent pillow if you want."

Jeonghan raised his wrist once again, noting that it was already three in the morning. "I appreciate that," he lifted his eyes to look at you. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it," you replied with a shy smile.

Some days later, you flew out to surprise your boyfriend in a foreign country. You realized that it wouldn't take much to convince your boyfriend that you were deep in work and totally not about to take a plane. And the reason why it was easy was because you barely talked anymore, since Joshua was kept busy with his own work.

The ticket that Jeonghan had gotten was for a VIP section, up in the wings on one side close to the stage. There was an ominous buzz coming from the people gathering below, waiting for the lights to go out, waiting for the show to begin.

The excitement that coursed through your entire body when you saw Joshua approach the stage and step under the lights was unparalleled. He looked almost ethereal to you. 

The orange glow coming from the overhead light made Joshua's frame look warmer and darker, for some reason. The shadows painted on his face almost gave him a melancholic appearance. His eyes remained closed, and his eyebrows knitted in deep focus as he started singing, his sweet and breathy tone taking over the entire venue.

The very few times you've gotten the opportunity to see him perform live, it has been up close. So now that you were some distance from him, you were overwhelmed by a nostalgic feeling, even if he was there, standing under a spotlight.

Slowly as he strummed the first chords of the opening song, the bass and drums joined in with a splashing crescendo, the whole stage became alight in yellow and purple hues and the crowd lauded in cheers and applause.

The song picked up some pacing and the sound of strenuous metal filled your ears, it banged through your body and took over you with a joyous sway. And it seemed that Joshua was taken over by the same urge to move his body to the happy and faster beat of the song.

Joshua looked elated by the time the first song ended. He smiled and gripped the microphone with one hand, eyes running over the crowd as he lifted the other hand, greeting the crowd by the name of its city.

"This is our first time here and we're excited to be opening for Crimson Moon," Joshua sighed with a pleased grin as the crowd went crazy again and waited until it died down again to say: "We're Midnight Haze and this next song is called Reverie."

Joshua turned to see the drummer's signal. Jihoon nodded at him and started playing right away. Then you watched the rest of Midnight Haze's opening show, you saw the lead singer dance with his guitar and frown while singing until the veins on his neck popped up slightly.

Midnight Haze took a minute before starting to play their last song, Joshua bent over to grab a bottle of water and looked at the sea of people as he gulped slowly and then lowered the bottle. His big brown eyes lifted up to the second level stopping cold when they zeroed on you.

Joshua's gaze softened and his shoulders went slack, he wasn't anticipating you there and it showed in his reaction. Your whole body went alight with exhilaration, making you raise your hand and wave at him, "Hi, baby," you mouthed.

The smile he gave you took over the beautiful features of his face, it was so bright that it seemed to quiet down the low murmur of the crowd. It made your whole world stop.

It was quick: he pressed the tips of his fingers against his lips and motioned the kiss at you. Then he was back on business, grabbing his guitar and a pick from the mic stand.

"This next song is our last, it's called Lights Out."

The song was quick paced and happy. It was one of your favorites because it seemed that every time you listened to its beat, it put you into a chipper mood. It ended with a bang, leaving the crowd ready for the main show.

It seemed that Joshua was eager to finish with his presence onstage and get off, because he just simply came forward, waving to the crowd with a cheerful: "We were Midnight Haze, have an incredible night!" and took the strap of his guitar off his shoulder, and walked out the stage with his bandmates following behind.

You wondered what would happen next. Should you wait until the main show is over to look for him? He must be busy after the show.

The following minutes went by achingly slow. You checked your phone to no avail—thinking that Joshua might reach out to you and tell you what to do next but as the white lights were still on, illuminating the whole venue, you looked, searched for his face,

You checked your phone again, biting your lower lip unsure of what to type, what would be the first thing you would say to him upon seeing him for the first time in days?

So you were beginning to type: where are you, on your phone, pressing send and hoping to see him replying. You waited, tapping the screen with the tip of your finger as if that were going to help change the offline status under your boyfriend's name.

You winced in alarm when two large hands slid onto your waist from behind you, and before you could turn to see, you instantly recognized your boyfriend's touch.

"Hi, baby," he muttered in your ear with a raspy voice. His arms encircled you, pressing you against his tall frame and he buried his face in your shoulder.

"Hi, handsome," you replied warmly.

The crowd cheered and went crazy the moment the stage lights went out, signaling that the main show was about to begin. At that moment, Joshua used his hands on you to turn you around, sinking his lips between yours in a hard kiss.

In the darkness, you tried to palm his chest, finding his sweaty face and neck from the performance he just stepped down from. But you still grabbed his face with your hands to press more kisses on his face.

The main show started with a loud whirring of guitars and a booming voice greeted the crowd from below.

"Come with me," Joshua muttered in your ear, grabbing one of your hands from his face and dragging you through the sea of people. He tugged at your hand to keep you close, maneuvering you to walk in front of him as you both went downstairs.

"Where are we going?" you asked innocently as he pointed you to a dimly lit corridor and now he led the way, away from the stage and the crowd.

The vibrations from the loud music muffled your voice, and it appeared that your boyfriend didn't hear you, but he turned all the same, pulling you from your arm and wrapping you in his again. Joshua was happy, the happiest you've ever seen in his eyes as he lifted you from the floor and twirled on his feet.

"Baby, what are you doing here?" he asked, now you were face to face so you heard him clearly. "I thought you were caught up with the book release."

"I wanted to surprise you," you replied with a shy smile.

He put you back on the ground, but was quick to lean down and capture your lips with his own. "When do you go back?" he asked between shallow kisses.

"Why? Do you want me to leave already?" you joked.

"No, no. I just want to know how much time we'll have," he replied, pulling apart and his brow furrowed.

"I leave on Monday," you replied to his question, seeing his expression change slightly. "I didn't lie, I do have a ton of stuff to get ready."

You saw his eyes roam on your face as he appeared to be thinking about something. "Can't you stay a bit longer?" he asked and then shook his head. "Nevermind. You're here."

His hand slid on the side of your face, grabbing you gently before kissing you, his lips moving on yours perfectly. You moaned when his tongue caressed your lower lip, turning the kiss into one that denoted his need to make you feel how much he missed you.

Joshua took your hand, motioning you to the end of the corridor where a large double door stood with security bodies. You both crossed it and then you were in a large waiting room.

You immediately spotted the other two members of Midnight Haze. Jihoon was sitting on one end of a black couch, and he was speaking with someone beside him, a man who you didn't recognize. Vernon on the other hand, was sitting on a lonely sofa, phone in hand and red cup in the other, scrolling his boredom away.

They were surrounded by small groups of people, seemingly all artists or people in the medium. It seemed like it, at least. When Joshua entered the room, a lot of eyes looked his way, and yours, since he was holding your hand and keeping you close to him.

"Hey, Josh, nice gig," someone said in passing, patting Joshua on the back.

"Thanks, man," Joshua nodded with a polite smile.

Your fingers were laced with his, but you felt like you needed both hands to hold onto his. The room was packed, and you felt tiny amongst the people who stood and stared at you.

You were suddenly hit with the realization that this was something that you would have to get used to. You were Joshua's girlfriend now. The lead singer of the successful band Midnight Haze is slowly rising to fame.

And you weren't sure if you wanted to be caught in the spotlight just yet.

Joshua led you to the end of the room where fewer people gathered, but still, he received a lot of praise as you both made your way over. There was a large table, covered with a black tablecloth and cluttered with snacks of all types.

"Are you hungry?" he asked softly, leaning closer so he would have the chance to talk to you in a sweet tone.

You shook your head silently, looking around to make sure no one kept their watchful eyes on your boyfriend.

He seemed not to notice this. "How did you get here?" he said and then his eyes widened. "Jeonghan. Did he do this?"

"Yeah," you shrugged. "Said he wanted us to have a moment together."

Joshua's brow furrowed in thought for a moment, but then he decided not to expand on that by saying: "I have to stay here for a couple of more minutes and then we can go to the hotel if you want to rest."

You tilted your head to one side, looking at his face. "I just want to be with you, handsome," you mumbled, but it came out like a sweet purr.

Joshua smiled, it was an instant reaction, as if his face didn't know what else to do. "Baby, are you flirting with me right now?"

You nodded shyly, tucking your lower lip between your teeth to avoid smiling.

"In front of all these people?" he muttered, his dark eyes glinting with amusement.

"So what if I am?" you blinked, trying with all your might to keep that composure. "What are you going to do?"

He closed his eyes with a smile, it was a brief gesture but you knew that he was enjoying this. But he kissed your forehead, pressing his lips fully to your skin, making you tilt your head back slightly.

"Behave," he muttered quietly. "I have to talk to some people we're recording with tomorrow and then we leave, okay?"

You smiled complacently and nodded. "Okay, baby," you replied with a sweet tone.

His hand cupped the back of your head and you reached out for his kiss. "Fuck," he whispered into your lips and a smile painted his face, rolling his eyes before he added: "Don't make this harder for me, bunny."

You chuckled and gave your seductive act up. "Fine."

Joshua nodded to the people behind you. "Come. You won't have to say anything, just don't leave my side, okay?"

You quickly understood and grabbed his hand again, which he took proudly as he got close to some guys. Joshua was quick to strike up friendly conversation with them, and you knew that they were some big producers that specialized in a very specific sound that Midnight Haze was interested in.

As the conversation shifted into a language that you couldn't follow anymore, your mind started to drift and with it, your gaze wandered around the room.

That's how you caught sight of her.

The first thing you noticed was her piercing gaze pointed in your direction. She tried to conceal her looking over the moment you spotted her, and she did this by pretending to be looking at her phone screen.

You thought nothing of it at first, a lot of people tend to stare at Joshua. He finds it easy to catch the attention of the people around almost unwillingly, most of it due to his very presence and crushing beauty.

But the second time you looked, and found her staring again, you weren't so sure she was just starstruck. The hair on your nape prickled, and you felt your face contort into a frown but you looked away.

"Nice, I'll let my guys know," you heard Joshua say. "Thank you."

He turned to you and exhaled. "That went well, didn't it?"

You nodded robotically.

"You weren't paying attention, right bunny?" he smiled endearingly at you, grazing your cheek with the back of his finger. "We can go now."

"Joshie, is that you?"

You turned over your shoulder to find the girl approaching you and your boyfriend, a bright smile on her pretty face as she stood closer. Now that you could see her clearer, the striking beauty of her face, her high cheekbones and full pink lips that matched the colored contacts on her eyes.

"Thea... hi," he replied slowly.

"I heard you guys were the opening act for the Crimson boys, but wanted to see that for myself," she locked her hands behind her back.

"Yeah, we are," Joshua added and sent you a brief look. "Uh, Thea, this is my girlfriend," he introduced you by name in an awkward manner, almost as if he had forgotten how to handle social encounters completely.

"Oh," she chirped and looked at you. "Hi."

"Hi. Nice to meet you," you smiled through your shyness.

"So, how long are you guys touring for?" she asked, her bright eyes moving up to see Joshua's face.

"We're going for the rest of this tour leg," he pressed his lips in a smile.

Slowly, you gathered that Thea was another singer. You had seen her face before and maybe heard a song or two from her indie rock band.

"That's great!" Thea squealed and you could see that she was being genuine when she added: "I'm happy for you guys."

A fiery wave flooded your tummy when you saw that, but you quickly brushed it away.

"Thanks, Thea."

Her eyes ignored you completely as they roamed on your boyfriend's frame. "I know how hard you worked for this, Joshie. You deserve it."

You slipped your hand out of his grasp quietly, squeezing his arm as if saying, 'I'll leave you guys to talk,' and went to the snack bar to grab a bottle of water. And to get away from the jealousy eating you from the inside.

You didn't register what happened next, and you made an effort to not look over. The heat on your cheeks from the embarrassment was so bad you stalled at the snack bar for longer than you actually needed.

You sat down on the couch with a small sigh. "Hi, there Vernon," you muttered.

"Hi, there," he replied aloofly and then looked up abruptly: "Oh, hi! What are you doing here? I didn't see you before, when did you get here?"

"I watched you open," you explained with a small smile. "It was good, you guys seem to know what you're doing."

Vernon squinted as he smiled at you. "Yeah, we're good actors, so it seems," he joked too.

Before you could handle yourself, your eyes were darting across the room. Joshua was still talking to Thea, an awkward look on his face as he smiled and nodded again, his eyes drifting towards you.

"Ah, don't worry about that," Vernon told you, probably reading the very evident confusion on your face. His sweet brown eyes were inconspicuously looking over at the scene you just ran away from and then he looked back at you.

"I'm not worried," you were quick to put in a smile. "I'm just not big on socializing, that's all."

"Yeah, I get that," he drew in a breath and nodded. "I get your case I mean. It gets tiring."

"Why are you still here? Don't you prefer to be resting back at the hotel?" you inquired, arching an eyebrow.

"The other guys want to go grab some drinks after the show is over," he shrugged. "I don't want to pass that up."

You nodded slowly, pretending to drink from your water bottle to dart another look. You were feeling more controlled now that you had taken a step back from the situation.

Your phone buzzed in your hand, making you look at the screen.

[10:29 PM] Jeongjeong: how did it go? 👀

That drew a smile on your face nearly instantly, you could imagine the curious look on his face as he typed.

[10:29 PM] you: it's going great. [10:29 PM] Jeongjeong: oof. [10:29 PM] Jeongjeong: do tell [10:29 PM] you: I'm sitting in the waiting room while he's talking to someone right now. [10:29 PM] Jeongjeong: this mf 🙄 i'm calling rn you hold on.

You answered his call upon the first ring.

"Yes?"

"Oh, grandma, it's so nice to hear you," Jeonghan cooed and then laughed.

"Shut up," you hissed, rolling your eyes.

"Get off your ass and walk out, pretend you can't hear me," he instructed.

You paused. "What, why?" you mumbled and darted a look to your boyfriend, who was still deep in conversation with his friend.

"Just do it, grandma," he scoffed and then gave you a deep chuckle.

"Okay, okay," you conceded, getting up from the black couch and walking towards the door you came from. You laughed at yourself when you even put up the act of being unable to hear the other end of the call, by covering your other ear.

"Are you out of his sight yet?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm in a hallway now," you frowned when a realization dawned on you: "You are a bad influence."

"And you are a pain in my ass. Surprising your stupid boyfriend cost me money, I'm not letting it go to waste," he retorted immediately. "Was he talking to a girl?"

"How did you know?"

"You wouldn't be upset otherwise," he replied with ease. "Now, let's just wait until he takes the bait."

"And then what?" you asked, looking back to the door, to see that it was clear.

"Um, I dunno, lie," you could almost picture him shrugging off.

"I can't just lie to him, Jeonghan," you muttered.

"Well, tell him it was me," he said reluctantly. "Just don't tell him why I called."

"That's called lying by omission," you quipped with a tone of obviousness.

"I know, Einstein," he huffed. "Who do you think you're talking to?"

"The biggest asshole I know."

"Huh," he chuckled. "If you weren't my best friend's girl I'd think you're flirting with me right now."

"Can't you come up with a more original response?" you quipped back. "I know you're trying to keep me talking, Han, but that's not going to work."

"Well, you're not helping either. You're awful at pretending," Jeonghan said calmly.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Is Shua there yet?"

"Answer my question!" you demanded.

"Baby? What's going on?" Joshua called from the other end of the hallway, your stomach dropped and you turned to see your boyfriend approaching you, a worried frown on his face.

"Okay, mission accomplished. Say bye to me and hang up," he directed quietly.

"I gotta go, b-bye," you muttered awkwardly, putting your phone in your back pocket.

Joshua arched his pierced eyebrow. "Everything okay?" he asked, his tone laced with a bit of confusion.

"Yeah, everything is fine," you mumbled with a shrug.

"Who were you talking to?" he asked, his tone coated with ease now and he motioned a hand at you.

You grabbed his hand and started walking beside him back to the waiting room. "Uh, no one," you responded in a faux nonchalant manner.

He stopped abruptly. "Baby," he said firmly, reading your eyes desperately.

"It's nothing, Josh," you gave him an empty smile and to emphasize it, you added a shrug.

Joshua appeared to be pondering over your words for a second. You saw that he still had traces of sweat trickling down the base of his head and onto his neck. You bit down your lower lip.

Your boyfriend straightened when two people passed by, patting him on his shoulder with a, "Nice gig," mentioned. He nodded and pressed his lips in a smile.

"Okay, let's go," he hissed, pulling your hand down the hallway, but turning to a door right before the waiting room. It had a sign that read STOREROOM and pushed the door open, dragging you inside the cramped closet.

It mostly was occupied by guitar cases, mic stands and amp cases. But Joshua found an empty wall where he could corner you, his hands pushing you by the waist until you bumped against the wall.

"Josh," you grabbed one of his wrists when it came up to clench the curve of your waist, his darkened gaze roaming all over your face.

"What's the matter with you, baby?" he asked, a honeyed purr as he leaned closer, the tip of his nose pushing against your own.

"What do you mean?" you breathed anxiously.

Joshua hummed softly as his lips met yours briefly, grazingly. "You walked away from me," he mumbled. "And now you don't want to tell me who you were talking to."

Oh, crap. Should you tell him it was Jeonghan on the phone? His best friend?

"Baby, there's nothing to worry about," you replied, a hand sliding from his shoulder and onto the side of his chest, feeling the buttons of his shirt. "Besides, you were busy talking with your friends. I didn't want to interrupt."

The corner of his mouth raised slightly. "Don't baby me," he growled, pushing your head back by pressing his forehead against yours. "Who were you talking to?"

"No one," you breathed.

"Mmn, right," he purred. "So you were just pretending? To see if I came running, looking for you?"

"Mmmaybe," you cooed, shuddering slightly when you felt his breath caress your lips.

"D'you like to do that?" he gave you a shallow kiss, his lips barely capturing yours.

"Yeah," you mewled, grabbing his face with both hands to kiss him deeply. "I missed you, Josh. Did you miss me?"

"You know I did," he growled, pressing more kisses on your lips. "Like crazy."

"Will you show me, baby?" you mumbled, your voice sounded almost alien to you, a whiny and breathy tone.

"Right here?" he frowned, almost as if he couldn't believe your sudden change in behavior.

"Right here," you nodded.

"Anyone could hear us baby, are you sure?" he inquired, not really looking for an answer, it seemed like he was just taunting you.

"I want this... or do you have something better to do?" you cocked your head to one side looking at him innocently. "Do you still have to tend to your fans?"

Joshua let out a chuckle into your mouth, his hand cupping your cheek as he planted more kisses on your face. "Brat," he whispered before his lips dipped into yours.

Suddenly, your anger and jealousy dissipated, almost as if all you needed were his lips on yours, moving seamlessly, just as all the nights you shared together.

"Are you still on the pill, baby?" he muttered when his hands slid from your waist down to the button of your jeans, undoing it with a sharp tug.

"Yeah," you frowned. "Obviously."

"Mn, why is that obvious?" he inquired, his lips moving to leave a trail of kisses to cheek to the shell of your ear.

"I wanted to be ready for you," you replied in a sing-song pitch.

"Mmn, well that's too bad," his hands dragged your jeans down.

"Why?" you breathed, feeling your brow furrow even deeper.

"I was hoping you weren't," he replied with a smirk. "So I can put a baby in you," he said, just as he kneeled before you.

"Joshua!" you chastised, his smirk turning into a wide cheeky smile.

"Baby," he replied with a small giggle, hooking his fingers on the band of your thong and pulling it down too, so that he could press kisses on your mound, closing his eyes to you before he pulled out his tongue and leave open mouthed kisses on your cunt.

"Mnf," you grabbed the back of his head as he continued to make out with your mound, his hands dragging down your jeans some more, blindly helping you to bring out a leg from your pants.

His tongue slipped between your folds, making a smacking sound with his mouth when he retreated slightly, bringing his pointer and middle finger to part the lips of your pussy to slowly push his tongue against your clit.

You held him by a fistful of dark hair, angling your hips forward so he could have more access with his mouth on your pussy. "Oh, Josh," you moaned with a high pitched tone.

"Do you want me to fuck you right here, baby?" he muttered, lifting his big doe eyes to your own.

Your whole body went ablaze and you instantly nodded without much thought put into it. "Yeah," you breathed out.

Joshua stood up, grabbing your face to angle it for his feathery kisses. "Do you want everyone to know you're mine?"

"Yes," you whispered. "God, yes, Josh."

You automatically searched for his belt, without toying or teasing you loosened it, to then unclasp and unzip his pants. A small chuckle came out of you when you had to untuck the white button up to get to his black boxers.

"I missed you, baby," you mewled, darting a look from the bulge beneath his boxers to his dark eyes.

Joshua let out a soft sigh, his eyes fluttering close when your hand pressed on his clothed hard on. "Missed you too," his voice was barely above a whisper. "You have no idea, bunny."

You pouted at him. "Then why won't you pay attention to me," you whined, your act suddenly broken by a shy smile.

He moved your body on top of a sound amplifier case, the height was just perfect enough for you to sit in, which you did, being forced by his hands searching your thighs to angle you for his body.

"I'm working, baby," he replied shortly, pulling out his hard cock from his briefs, guiding it to your core. "And I told you to wait."

Your hands slid beneath his white button up, gripping his sides tightly as he sank on you in one go. "Umf," you bit down your lip to avoid making more noise.

"Fuck," he whispered, dropping his forehead on yours. "Okay?"

You nodded slightly. "Okay," you breathed, your hands sliding down to his hips to push his boxers down further. "Move, please, Joshua."

He groaned before complying, pushing his hips on you shallowly at first. "God, baby. You're so fucking tight."

You swallowed back a moan, grabbing on his shirt with your fists to search for the buttons blindly, your eyes trained on his.

"Do you want me to put a baby in you, sweetheart?" he asked, not letting go of your sudden confession.

A moan coiled in your throat, making you close your eyes, as his thrusts hit deeply inside you. "Yeah," you mewled, undoing one button at a time. "Want everything with you."

"Mmn," Joshua hummed, pushing his forehead against yours, grazing his lips with yours as he whispered: "Get off the pill."

Your body acted naturally, your legs parting wider for his thrusts, his cock reaching deeper inside you, making you moan lewdly.

"You're not serious," you whispered, parting his white shirt wide to uncover his torso for your view.

"I am," he gasped in your mouth. "I wouldn't joke with this."

"Baby steps, Joshua," you whispered shakily.

"I love you," he responded frantically, grabbing your hips to hold you in place as his thrusts changed in pace, moving faster and deeper against you.

"I love you too," you echoed.

The moan that escaped your mouth reverberated across the small closet, making you gasp and hold onto his shoulders to let him chase his high, his cock ramming inside your walls.

You knew it had to be a quick fuck, so you didn't care if you reached your climax, you were content with the pleasure you got from his cock sliding in and out of you, the faces he made, the soft gasps that left him as he did so.

You leaned back just a bit, angling your cunt for him to fuck open. A lewd whimper bubbled in your chest when he hit a glorious spot inside you, making the features of his face scrunch to muffle a moan.

"Shh," he hissed. "Quiet, baby."

You nodded aloofly, your hands pushing the white button up from his shoulders to uncover more of his beautiful skin to ruin. You first attached your mouth to his, giving him a hungry kiss before dipping your head down on the crook of his neck.

"Fuck," he whispered when you suckled on the sensitive spot of his neck, moving your mouth with a trail of open kisses until you reached his throat.

You sucked on his skin at the base of his throat, delighting on the careless moans that started to leave his mouth now. He didn't relent on the movement of his hips, fucking you with the same deep and controlled pace.

You gritted your teeth, muffling a whimper when the tip of his cock reached a point that made your muscles tighten in response as pleasure took over your body.

"Josh," you mewled, trying to hold onto him, to hold onto reality but your mind was slipping into nothingness, all focus was now on his cock ramming inside you with a deliriously good pace.

"Open your mouth," he growled, and nodded when you gave him a confused look. "Come on."

Before you could do what he asked, his hand came up to your face, using two fingers to open your mouth wide for him. You thought that he would just stick his fingers in your mouth to shut you up. But instead, you watched his lips purse slightly as he spat in your mouth, a low whimper bubbling in your chest.

"Shhh," he smiled menacingly. "Swallow."

You swallowed his spit obediently, closing your mouth but his hand was there to force it open again.

"I didn't tell you to close it again," he purred quietly, sticking his fingers between your lips as he continued to push his cock inside your walls. "Misbehave again and I'll just fuck your mouth, bunny."

Your brows furrowed, and you made a pleading sound.

"You don't want that, right?" he nodded at you and smiled when you pulled your tongue for him to land his spit in before saying: "Good girl."

His spit started to drip down your tongue along with your own drool, beginning to slide down your chin.

"Swallow," he instructed with a low tone and you closed your mouth to do so. "You want my cum inside your pretty cunt, don't you baby?"

You moved your head up and down in sharp nods, a low whimpering moan coming out of you at the sound of that.

"I'm gonna make you a mommy," he gasped, picking up a pace to his thrusts, hitting you deeper, harder.

"Joshua," you gasped, resting your forehead on his shoulder, his button up hanging languidly on his biceps now. "Yes, Josh, please."

His hand shifted from the curve of your waist to the back of your head, while the other just encircled your body so his arm was wrapped around you firmly.

"Fuck, I'm cumming," he groaned when you started sucking love bites below his collarbones. "Are you gonna take it all? So I can put a baby in you?"

You mewled a sound in confirmation, moving your head to face him. "Yeah," you breathed. "Come inside me, Joshua, please."

He sealed his mouth against yours, his thrusts slowing down, languidly fucking his cum inside you with a muffled moan as he kissed you, passionately, breathing erratically with you.

"I love you, baby," he whispered sweetly once he stopped, breathless.

"I love you too, Joshua," you replied in the same manner.

He smiled lazily, his hand moving from the back of your head to cup your cheek. "Let's go to the hotel room. I want to make you feel good too, baby."

You nodded. "Okay."

"Okay," he replied dazedly, his thumb rubbing back and forth on your cheek.

"Are you going to head out first?" you asked innocently, legs beginning to tremble at his sides.

You felt his brow furrow. "No," he mumbled. "You want me to do that?"

"You don't care if we're seen coming out like this?"

"Baby, they probably heard us fucking just now," he gave you a hollow chuckle.

A shock of emotions coursed through you, caused by the odd fixation you had by him fucking you in public spaces. It felt exciting, almost shameful, and so very lewd.

"This is very rockstar of you," you laughed shakily.

"You think so?" he gasped tiredly, pushing his eyebrows up.

You were suddenly struck with the overwhelming beauty of his face. His big brown eyes as he also seemed to be lost in the features of your own face.

"Yeah," you whispered with a shy smile.

"Do you like it, sweetheart?" he purred, leaning down to press small kisses in your lower lip.

"You know I do," you breathed. "I like it when you take me anywhere you can."

He smiled softly, you felt his lips stretch as he did so. "Mmn, I might've turned you into a little sex monster."

You laughed out loud, the sound making your boyfriend's smile wider and brighter.

"Lean back baby, I'm pulling out."

You pushed your hands on the amp case, leaning back as he pulled his cock out of you. A shudder shook you when you caught a glimpse of his wet shaft as his hand tucked it back into his black briefs and fixed his pants.

"Don't move," he whispered, kneeling again so he could gather your panties and hook them around your ankle, dragging them up.

You lifted your hips slightly, looking at the focus written in his face as he helped you get dressed. You reached out to arrange his white shirt again, smiling deviously when you didn't button all the way up, leaving his chest uncovered.

Joshua smiled too when he noticed that you had purposefully left his chest uncovered for everyone to see the red love bites you had planted in his skin, between his collarbones, on his throat and between his pecs.

"Let's go," he said, extending a hand out to you.

Joshua led you back into the waiting room, only to tell the other guys that he was returning to the hotel and that he was spending the night with you instead of going out to get drinks.

You noticed the looks you got from different faces, the small smiles and hushed noises they made as you walked out of the room hand in hand with Joshua.

There was a certain feeling you got from the looks—you knew that the fact that Joshua had just fucked you in a storeroom caused a mixture of shame and excitedness in you. But there was something more, the rush you felt because the looks meant that they knew what you did.

The original issue for your jealousy was a long distant thought now. It seemed almost amusing that you didn't care anymore about the reason why you felt jealous.

It wasn't until you saw her again. Thea was looking your boyfriend's way, the moment causing you no emotion at all now. You couldn't read what you saw in her eyes, and you found it alarming that you didn't care at all.

But then you felt his cum dripping out of you, pooling in your panties. Embarrassment warmed your face, feeling it strum in your eardrums as you tried to hide your face, your fingers wrapped around his hand tightening in a knowing gesture.

Joshua turned his head and gave you a brief look. "I know," he muttered. "Let's get out of here, baby."

He interlocked his fingers with yours, leading you down the long hallway and turned down a darker one, at the end you saw the EXIT sign lit in red neon light. It felt as if you and Joshua were walking away from the booming music, leaving it behind on the stage and escaping into the night.

"The hotel where I'm staying is just down the street," Joshua said, pointing with his thumb over his shoulder. "Do you mind walking?"

You smiled and started walking the way he pointed you to, pulling on his arm.

"Do you want me to carry this for you?" he asked sweetly, tugging the strap of your pretty tote bag from your shoulder and you allowed him to carry it on his shoulder.

"Thank you baby," you smiled at the look of your boyfriend carrying your bag for you.

"So," he sighed, a tired smile on his face as he looked down to find your face. "Do you want kids?"

A surge of heat flooded your entire body, sizzling underneath your skin. You casted a look at the night sky. "Having kids is something I definitely haven't planned for, honestly," you frowned with some thought. "So honestly, I don't know. Why?"

You found his eyes again, his gaze had softened and he pouted at you cutely as he hummed, also in a thoughtful way. "You seemed a little eager," he shrugged.

As you rolled your eyes, a shy smile twitched at the corners of your lips as you asked: "And you?"

"Yeah, I'd like to. Some day."

You stopped walking for a moment, making him stop. "Baby, you don't think we're going a little too fast?"

The corners of his mouth raised a little. "You don't think we need to talk about this?" he retorted.

"Of course," you blinked, your stomach twisting when you saw the cute smile crowning his mouth.

"Let's get to the room first then," he muttered softly, running the back of his finger across your cheek.

When you got to the hotel, Joshua told you to wait in the nice waiting area arranged in the lobby and you watched him approach the counter, drawing the gaze from the front lady.

Propping an elbow in the counter, he leaned slightly forward, giving the lady a polite smile as he prompted a conversation which you weren't within earshot to catch. But you saw your boyfriend look in your direction, smiling softly at the front desk lady and your stomach sank slightly when the lady smiled at you and then to him.

You watched the interaction from afar, wondering what was the cause for those looks both Joshua and the lady sent you until he nodded, smiling brightly at her and you were witness to the power that smile held, because the woman behind the counter looked speechless for a second.

He pushed himself off the counter, tapping once with his hand and then turned to you, a cheeky grin on his face and then he sat down next to you.

"What was all that?" you asked curiously.

"I had to arrange for a room for us," he muttered close to you and grabbed your hand, interlocking his fingers with yours and placing the laced hands on his lap. "And kind Claire there is going to help us with that. Now we have to wait for a bit, baby."

The woman named Claire seemed to perk up at the sound of Joshua mentioning her name. She smiled politely and resumed working on the monitor in front of her.

You sighed and leaned your head against his shoulder, feeling his warmth and catching the scent of his cologne, the freshness of it, the smell of his skin, all mixed up. It made you feel something deep in your being, like being punched in the gut with the realization that you are way into deep now.

"You're tired baby," Joshua said softly when he heard you sigh and took the hand he was already holding to kiss each of your knuckles. "We shower and then we go to bed, does that sound alright?"

From the corner of your eye you caught the sight of the lady smiling at you and Joshua, it was a somewhat sweet smile, as if endearing.

"Don't we need to talk about something, babe?" you answered, lifting your head to meet his sweet brown eyes.

He blinked, as if pushing the matter away. "It can wait," he muttered, bringing a hand to cup your chin. "We can talk about it tomorrow, if you'd like."

"Mr. and Ms. Hong," a polite male voice called, approaching you from the other end of the lobby. "Your room is ready for you."

"Thank you," Joshua replied, getting up from the couch and tugging your arm softly.

Your stomach twisted upon suspecting what had happened at the front desk and you eyed your boyfriend, curiosity in your eyes which he tried to ease by giving you a gentle squeeze to your hand.

You entered the elevator and stood near Joshua, who was humming to a song as he toyed with the keycard to the room. It was a song you didn't know, and you started guessing that it was what Midnight Haze was working at the moment.

"This might be fancier than I expected," Joshua muttered under his breath when you both reached the floor and walked down the hall to a double door. He checked the keycard again with a question written on his face and slided it on the sensor.

"Joshua, what did you tell the lady?" you inquired when he opened the doors to the recently cleaned hotel room.

"Just the truth," he hummed as he closed the door, he read the disbelief in your gaze and he coughed. "I just told her that you came here to surprise me and I needed a bigger room, and... told her that my beautiful wife needed some rest after her long flight, that's all." 

Your entire body beamed with ecstasy and adoration. It seemed endearing to you the way Joshua used the word wife to refer to you. He loved it, almost as if it were real.

The room was large, the first thing you saw on entering was the small round table, surrounded by a couple of chairs, followed by a living room, a fake fireplace wall served as a divider to the bedroom, where you could catch a glimpse of the large king-size bed.

The living room was framed by large floor-to-ceiling windows, the curtains were drawn and you could see that there was a balcony overlooking the city skyline.

"I have to go down to get my suitcases and I'll be back," Joshua informed you and left after you nodded in confirmation. You took this time to hop in the shower, the warm water washing the alertness from you and when you came out, you were feeling ready for bed.

You wrapped your body in one of the bathrobes and walked out of the bathroom. The bed looked so inviting that you couldn't resist but to lie in it, curling yourself into a ball and you fought it at first but sleep took you in quickly.

That was until you felt a pair of strong arms lifting you gently and tucking you underneath the heavy covers. Joshua's hard and warm body huddled with yours from behind, burying his nose in your hair to breathe in slowly.

"I missed you so much," he whispered. You realized, as you came out of your slumber that he said this thinking you wouldn't hear.

But you grabbed his hand, squeezing it softly before you turned to face him. "I missed you too," you muttered sweetly at him.

"Did I wake you up?" he whispered, pushing your hair from your face with his hand. "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it," you breathed, bringing a hand to his nape, feeling his long hair, wet from the shower he just took. Joshua blinked slowly, keeping his eyes focused on your face. "Come here."

You used the hand that was already on his nape to bring him for your lips slipping between his as he reciprocated the slow, tender kiss. He moaned in your mouth when your tongue lapped on his lower lip.

Next thing you knew, he was pushing you on your back, pinning you against the soft mattress with his semi-naked body. Your hands immediately attached to his sides, feeling the hard muscles of his lats tense up under your touch.

The kiss deepened, urgency setting in, and now you were the one moaning when his lips littered your jawline with kisses and down your throat. Wide awake now, you felt his fingers search for the knot of your robe, tugging at it lose for him to have access to your naked body.

"Baby," he growled in your mouth, when your fingers hooked in the band of his boxers, the tip of his nose nudged against yours, his hot breath caressing your lips.

"Take me, Joshua," you mewled, pushing the black stretchy fabric down to find his cock with your hand, gently pumping him as you felt it harden on your grasp.

"Let me make love to you, baby," he whispered softly, pinching your chin with his thumb and pointer finger. You nodded and his lips stretched into a smile.

The rest of the night was something you only thought possible within your dreams. Joshua kept his body pressed on yours as he made love to you, rolling his hips slowly against yours, kissing you until he had to gasp for air, his touch so gentle you swallowed back sobs.

His face contorted slightly when he saw your eyelashes wet in tears, but he kept repeating, over and over, that he loved you. He wanted to be yours forever, he wanted you as his wife—he didn't care how soon it was for him to say it.

You fell asleep afterwards, your body laced with his, subconsciously looking for him if either of you drifted apart on the bed. You could feel soft kisses pressed on your shoulder and on your hair. Almost as if even in his sleep he couldn't keep his hands and lips to himself.

The next morning, you woke up to Joshua planting a kiss on your forehead, then the smell of his fresh cologne dragged you out of slumber in a second. "Where are you going?" you muttered.

Joshua was just walking to the door when he heard your voice. "I have a recording session today," he sat down on the bed, grabbing your hand to kiss your knuckles. "We can do something tonight. Go on a date. Would you like that, baby?"

"Yeah," you whispered, still drowsy from the long night. "I'd love that."

Joshua smiled fondly at you, leaning close to you and left a feathery kiss on your lips. "A date it is, then," he whispered before getting up and leaving the room.

So instead of going out on a date, you arranged with the hotel staff to bring a tablecloth, cutlery and wine glasses, and went out to buy candles and a bottle of wine. You set the table with candles and checked the hotel menu for something to order.

But time passed and you waited, sitting all pretty in a dressing gown, hiding the set you had bought for the occasion; which had to be changed into a large T-shirt of Joshua's when he failed to come back at the time he said he would. No phone call, no text to explain himself.

You drank a glass of wine alone and felt miserable again. Blowing out the candles, you went to lie on the big bed and decided to go to sleep. That was until you heard the faint beeping of the door, followed by noises from the living room that made you jump out of bed.

The faux marble tiles were freezing cold under your bare feet as you made your way to the small living room. You had been woken up from a very light sleep in the middle of the night when you heard the soft beeping of the door to your hotel room.

The lonely lamp in one corner of the room had been turned on, so now the room was provided by a soft orange glow on the man sprawled on the black sofa, his legs spread wide apart.

Your boyfriend had his head tilted back, an arm on the headrest, the other over his torso, between his legs there was a short glass of whiskey held by his long fingers. He didn't notice you coming in, and you assumed that he was so tired that he might be falling asleep already.

Walking silently up to him and once you were standing between his knees, you noticed his eyes were open and he was staring mindlessly at the ceiling.

"Hi, baby," he croaked with a low raspy voice as he leaned forward to take a generous gulp of whiskey and set it aside on the coffee table.

"You could've called," you reproached not a second later.

You heard him sigh. "I know. I'm sorry, bunny," he replied, avoiding your eyes. But then a sigh bubbled in his chest when he caught sight of the half empty wine bottle on the small round table, and the lonely glass of wine beside it.

"You're not invited for my next late night dinner," you told him, driving his gaze from the wasted candles on the table to your eyes, you pouted cutely at him, letting him know that you were joking.

"Baby, I'm sorry," he blinked and looking up to lock eyes with you made his look bigger, glinting on the glow of the lamp.

Then he grabbed your hand that was dangling at your side and took it to his lips, kissing your knuckles lightly.

Now that he was looking at you, taking your whole frame in, he noticed you sported one of his clean t-shirts. It didn't fit you properly, obviously, since it was a few sizes too big even for his own body. So the length covered up to your mid thigh and the sleeves reached your elbows.

"Were you sleeping before I got here, sweetheart?" he inquired with a soft tone.

"I was snoozing for a bit. Waiting for you, actually," you muttered back just as he tugged the hand he was still holding, pulling you forward.

You understood what he wanted, so you pressed one knee on the couch just beside him, and then the other to sit on top of him on his lap. His hands circled your waist, giving you a firm squeeze.

"Please forgive me, baby," he insisted for a third time.

The dim lighting of the hotel suite let you appreciate the beautiful features of his face, his big brown eyes, his plump lips, the eyebrows that knitted ever so slightly when you didn't come up with a response.

"I know work is important, babe," you replied slowly. "But at least let me know when our plans change. Deal? Texting me takes you twenty seconds."

You said this while one of your hands started brushing his soft dark hair away from his eyes. You did this almost absentmindedly, as if your hands had a mind on its own. Joshua blinked a few times, but his eyes didn't deter away from your face.

You could tell that he loved it when you reprimanded him like this, the seriousness you would take, but still delivering your sentences with a gentle tone.

"I forgive you. But next time I won't be too forgiving," you told him, smiling playfully.

"Thank you, baby," he smiled too. But it was a small smile, trying to mask the tiredness on his eyes.

But before you could say something more, your boyfriend pressed his lips against yours. Softly at first, almost apologetically. As if trying to test you for any pause or reluctance before his lips dipped between yours.

You tasted the whisky on his tongue once it slipped inside your mouth, his hands flatly placed on your thighs, his fingers digging on your skin.

The black and white plaid shirt he wore felt soft under your skin as you slid your forearms over his shoulders to lace your hands behind his nape.

The rough pads of his fingers grazed your thighs then he moved his hands to your lower back, pushing you forward to make you sit on him fully.

"Josh," you whispered with an unspoken question lingering in your lips, pulling apart from his face to take a good look at him.

The tiredness lingered in the features of his face, but the glint on his eye had taken a darkness to it, a certain hunger you knew too well about him.

"I like how you look with my stuff on," he muttered, it sounded like a breathy growl, almost like the way he sounded in the mornings when he woke up.

"Mm, yeah?" you whispered, tilting your head to one side as your fingers started toying with the hair on the back of his head. "Would you like to see me without it?"

His tongue pushed on his lower lip slowly as he nodded with his head. "Yeah," his voice was now below a murmur. "I'd love that, baby."

You smiled at the sound of that. His hands grabbed the baggy t-shirt on his fists and lifted it up as you also raised your arms for him to take it off you and threw it on the side, leaving you with your boyshort panties only.

"Mm," he hummed happily as he dipped his head to kiss you, a hand sliding on the side of your neck while the other traveled from your thigh to the small of your back.

Then your fingers moved to get the buttons of his plaid shirt, undoing each quite hastily.

"Slow down, baby," he growled into your mouth.

"No," you mumbled back.

"Why are you rushing? We have all night."

"You stood me up," you sulked slightly, even if you had forgiven him, you wouldn't let him off the hook just yet. "Let me have this."

That made Joshua smile, letting you have your fun undoing the buttons of his black and white plaid shirt, which was not buttoned all the way to the neck, only halfway because he wore a black long-sleeve underneath.

Once the shirt was off his shoulders, your hands cupped his face fully, palms pressed to his cheeks as you kissed him with hunger. A small laugh was muffled in your mouth when your hands moved onto his black t-shirt, probably laughing at your impatience.

"You're so hot," you breathed, not caring how needy you sounded. A sigh left your lips, running your hands over his lean chest, over the angry red hickeys you made the night prior in the middle of the storeroom quickie.

His hand captured your chin, caressing your soft skin with his calloused fingertips. The sensation made you shudder a bit.

"C'mere," he motioned you over to kiss you fervently, making you moan in his mouth when his hands roamed all over your body and stopping to cup your butt, pushing you slowly so you could grind on his crotch.

You held onto the headrest with your hands just before you could push your clothed pussy on the growing bulge in his jeans, moving your hips so that your clit was angled to the rough fabric of his clothing.

With a soft moan that landed on his lips, you sneaked a look down his body, his naked torso, the hickeys on his chest, the messy look on his hair, the lust-lidded eyes when you looked back at his face.

"Bunny," he muttered in your mouth, patting the side of your thigh softly. "Get up."

Before you could stop yourself, you obeyed all too willfully, removing yourself from his lap. His hands were immediately working on removing your panties, sliding them down your legs and you stepped out of them when they fell to your ankles.

His hands were seizing you by your hips just when you started to move onto his lap again. "Stay still, baby," he instructed, leaning his head to litter kisses across your tummy.

"Josh. No teasing," you urged when you felt his tongue brush on the spot below your belly button, your hands cupped the back of his head, following his trail down to your mound.

"Shh, don't get bratty now," he said, his voice honeying over the warning.

"Bratty?" you repeated, trying not to squirm on his grasp when his lips kissed the lowest point of your mound, your sensitive skin reacting with his delicate touch.

"You heard that right," he bit back softly against your skin.

"You stood me up," you whined, your fingers curling on his soft black hair when you felt his teeth grazing your sensitive skin. "I'm not being bratty," you put emphasis over the last word, mocking it.

"I thought you had forgiven me, baby," he lifted his head from the apex of your thighs, raising his pierced eyebrow at you.

You brushed his bangs from his forehead. "That doesn't mean my feelings aren't hurt."

He smiled slowly, totally telling on your intentions. "What do I have to do to get your complete forgiveness?"

You rolled your eyes at his dramatic intonation. "Just don't do it again," you muttered and then nodded back. "Keep going, Josh."

One hand slid down from your waist to caress your leg, you could feel the worn pads of his fingers from playing guitar the whole day.

"Mm," he hummed thoughtfully, his eyes following your face down to your whole body. "Where is this attitude coming from? You've been really bratty since last night."

You saw the glint in his eye again, he was amused by your small tantrum. It was clear to both of you that the reason didn't stem from being stood up by him. There was more.

You shook your head. "'s nothing," you mumbled.

"After this, will you tell me?" he asked and you could tell he wasn't playing anymore.

"Yeah. I will, Josh," you reassured with a small smile.

His eyes read your face with a glint of adoration in them that made your stomach twist, he blinked slowly at you, releasing a short sigh. "I need you so bad, baby," he muttered and leaned in again to kiss your tummy.

"Did you have a bad recording session?" you finally caught on.

Joshua immediately groaned, but softly, making you feel his breath brushing against your lower tummy. "I don't wanna talk about it right now," he muttered. "But yeah. It didn't come out as I expected."

The pad of your thumb brushed over the pierced eyebrow, making his eyelids flutter a bit. "Are you upset about it?"

His hand shifted on your waist just slightly. "No, baby," he frowned, he sucked in a breath through his teeth. "Well, only at myself."

"Would you… like to take it out on me?" your voice dropped to a whisper.

Rare were the times when you mustered such boldness. But ever since your bond with Joshua started to get stronger, the innate shyness revolving around intimate things had started to fade.

"No, bunny," he mumbled, discarding the idea by nodding his head to the side.

"I mean it," you insisted, now tugging at his earlobe with your fingers, toying a little with the piercings on the shell of his ear. "I want it."

Joshua licked his lips briefly, contemplating your proposition again with a calmed darkness in his doe eyes. "Are you sure, baby?"

"I wouldn't be asking if I wasn't."

He read you just a moment before he closed his eyes, leaning his face forward to press his lips in your bare tummy once again. "You know what to do, right?"

Your hand went back to cup the back of his head. "Yes," you whispered, referring to using your safeword whenever necessary.

"That's my girl," he growled softly against your skin, his hot breath making you shudder.

"Mm-mmph," you hummed briefly, letting yourself close your eyes as your boyfriend's grip on your hips tightened a bit.

Joshua hummed after you, leaving a trail of kisses down from your belly button to your mound again, as if that was all he wanted before you interrupted.

"My sweet girl," he whispered almost lovingly against your skin.

He motioned your leg over, making you step on the black couch. Now your leg was angled perfectly for him to dip his head in, pushing his tongue flush in between your pussy lips, as if he were making out with your cunt sloppily, noisily.

"Joshua," you moaned, your fingers tangling on his long hair and holding onto his locks.

He only gave you a low hum in response, shoving his tongue against your clit, teasing it with open kisses. His grip tightened when you squirmed, his fingers digging into your muscle, the hand was located on your hip circled back to cup your butt while the other kept your leg angled open for him.

"God, Josh!" you squealed when he grazed your clit with his teeth gently, but the sensation was overwhelming.

"Hm?" he raised his eyes to match yours, shifting to litter your mound with kisses.

"Too much," you mumbled sheepishly.

"Is it bad?" he asked with a hint of concern.

You shook your head slowly, feeling a rush of warmth tingling on your cheeks.

"If it feels good don't stop me," he replied gruffly, arching his eyebrow at you. "I thought you knew this already, baby."

"Yeah. Sorry," you breathed.

The palm that was firmly placed on your butt lifted only to give you a gentle pat. "Get on all fours, bunny," he muttered and nodded to the chaise longue close to the wide windows that led to the balcony.

As you propped up your knees on the black velvet chaise, you looked up to find your reflection painted on the glass window, a thought crossed your mind—your boyfriend was being soft with you. Granted, he had admitted already that he's into harder stuff than what he has done with you. But this was, to say the least, upsetting.

"Are you holding back?" you asked as soon as you lowered your hands on the cushions.

"No, I'm not," he replied simply, making you cast a look at the man that was still wearing his jeans, torso in full display.

His hair was so long now that his bangs reached the dark circles under his eyes, shadowing his beautiful doe eyes.

"I think you are," you teased, turning to the reflection on the glass now smiling to yourself. "Don't hold back, Josh. I'm not going to break."

The metallic sound of the buckle of his belt made you turn your head to see your boyfriend again. Joshua rolled his eyes and shook his head slightly, he didn't seem annoyed, but the flat tone on his next words made you rethink.

"Stand up straight, wrists on your back."

You had a good view of what happened behind you as you stood back onto your knees, placing your wrists on your back as your boyfriend closed in on you, biting his lower lip as he looped his belt around your wrists.

A low grunt coiled in his throat when he tightened the belt on your wrists, puncturing another hole in it to avoid it unbuckling. He gave it a harsh tug before his eyes zeroed on your face through the reflection on the glass door.

You saw him lean in, so that his lips brushed against the shell of your ear. "Will you be good for me, bunny?"

"Yeah," you whispered shakily, anticipating what Joshua would do next.

"Now bend over," he instructed after he kissed your ear softly.

"But–"

"Don't worry, I got you," he tightened his grip on your bound wrists. "Bend over."

You gulped hard, releasing a nervous sigh before you bent over, steady at first until your face was some eight inches from the seat, not falling onto your nose all due to your boyfriend helping you ease the side of your face against the velvet cushion of the seat.

"I wanted to take my time with you tonight," you heard him sigh in disapproval. "But you had to be so impatient."

"It's not my fault," you whispered. "You haven't been here and I just wanted to—fuck!" you yelped and almost stumbled when his hand came down to spank your ass suddenly.

"I didn't say you could talk back," he ran his hand over the tingling area, cooing softly: "Talking back, throwing tantrums at me. You know what happens when you misbehave. Right, bunny?"

You closed your eyes and nodded. "Yes," you replied.

His hands grabbed you by the hips. "Open your legs," he said softly and you carried out his instruction, widening your stance, gaining more stability to avoid tumbling on the chaise.

Now you were quite completely submitted to him. Your fingers tightened on the leather material of his belt, your wrists with little to no space to budge on the makeshift bondage. Ass up, knees wide apart, face pressed to the seat of the velvet chaise.

"You look so good like this, bunny," you heard him mutter behind you, his hand caressing your lower back lightly, beneath your bound hands, making your eyelids flutter under the tingling sensation.

"Do you want to record this?" you replied mutedly, trying to keep it in you how much you liked to be subdued by his control.

"No," you felt the chaise shift under the weight of one of his knees pressing to the edge. "I have a better idea, bunny. If you behave."

You tried to move slightly to get a view of him on the glass door. He had lost the jeans and was now wearing black briefs only. Propping one knee behind you, your boyfriend was looking at your body, as if trying to decide what to do first before he leaned over you, then you saw one hand press beside you.

Then his lips were on the back of your exposed neck, his fingers moving your hair to the side as he littered your back with wet kisses, slowly, you even felt his breath and when he licked his own lips to kiss you again, knowing well that it was a sensitive area for you.

You squirmed slightly, groaning when your skin awoke with a violent shudder.

"Don't move, bunny," he muttered with his honeyed voice, pressing his lips on your shoulder blade. "If you do, I won't release your hands," he conditioned.

You bit your lip before you could scoff at that. Something told you he wasn't in the mood for more of your taunting. "Okay," you breathed, bracing yourself for more of his delicate kisses.

Joshua left a trail of kisses until he reached your hands, it was then that he moved back, grabbing your hips with his hands and you let out a sharp breath when you felt a kiss on one of your buttocks.

You heard him hum softly against your skin, the reflection on the glass showed your boyfriend on one knee on the floor, his hands traveling from your hips down to cup your ass as his lips kissed the sensitive spot beside your cunt.

You screwed your eyes shut when Joshua ran his tongue between your folds, tasting how aroused you were from the situation alone, from his taunting kisses, from his entire demeanor over you.

"Fuck-k," you squeaked out when he groaned against your sopping core, dipping his tongue in, his hands firmly grabbing you as he pushed his wet muscle against your entrance.

But you dare not move, even if you felt like you could. You let out a raw moan against the black velvet as his tongue ran flatly across your folds, giving your cunt broad and generous strokes, not committing to one motion at all, eating you out sloppily.

"Joshua," you moaned, trying to get as much pleasure from the teasing. "Fuck—babe, please," you whimpered pathetically.

He hummed again, the sound interrupted only by the smacking noise coming from his lips giving your cunt open and deep kisses. You realized then that he didn't seek your pleasure out of this, he was only trying to draw out your arousal, to prep you for something else.

"Please," you begged for more, for something you could use to come.

His tongue glided from your clit, up to your entrance drinking your juices before he continued up, ignoring your whimpers, fingertips digging into your flesh as he gave you a soft, slow stroke with his tongue around your hole, leaving a prickling sensation over, so overwhelming you felt your whole body try to tense and to recoil from feeling good.

"Remember what I said," he told you with a low tone, immediately reading your body language.

You gave him a nod, even if you weren't sure he'd see it. If it felt good, there was no need to stop it. So you tried to relax, breathing in as his tongue lapped again around the tender and very sensitive area, making your fingers curl around the belt you were still restrained by, the feeling so arousing like you've never felt before.

The sensation was too much, it felt undeniably good, a wave of sweet pleasure coursing through your whole body. You felt your pussy throb at each lap of his tongue, stroking slowly around your hole, making it go lax ever so slightly.

The room had fallen silent, the only thing you could hear was his low hums against your skin, the wet sound from his mouth every time he gave another lap over your sensitive ridges with his tongue. Even the voice in your mind had died.

He kissed one of your glutes again, moving one hand to tease your hole with the tip of his finger.

"Josh," you moaned weakly, pressing your face onto the seat cushion to wipe the drool from the corner of your mouth.

"You have the prettiest ass," he hummed entrancingly. "Want me to buy you plugs?"

He pushed one finger in, you screwed your eyes shut again and pressed your face plush against the seat to avoid squirming.

"Mm-mmph," you moaned in affirmation loud enough for him to hear.

"You're being so good for me right now," he cooed softly, dragging his finger out slowly. "Almost forgot how bratty you were before this. You like that, bunny?"

"Mm-mmph," you managed to nod again.

"Want me to fuck you like this?" he asked and you moved your head to peak at the reflection.

"Please, Josh," you gasped at the mere thought.

You saw his reflection rise to his feet. "Without prepping you first, baby? You're not even taking my whole thumb right now," he pointed humbly. "Do you think you can take me?"

You paused, feeling his thumb push in and out gently, making you groan again. The mild penetration was enough to make you feel pleasure, you tried to imagine the same thing but instead of his thumb, with his cock and you immediately gulped.

"Mm? I need an answer baby," he pressed, his tone playful, you caught a shadow of a smile through the reflection.

"Just fuck me," you blurted impatiently with a mewling tone. "Please, Joshua. Fuck me."

"Mmm, you think you deserve it?" he titled his head to one side. "I don't think so."

"Please—I'm being good," you gasped when he pushed his thumb deeper.

"I think we can agree that you need more prepping, baby," he tutted, pulling his thumb out, making you gasp at the loss of stimulation.

"I'll do anything, please, just–"

Then you felt his grip on the belt and gave it a small tug. "I'm pulling you up, ready?"

You got up on your knees with his help, the motion almost made you feel lightheaded but came back to your senses rapidly when you felt the belt loose around your wrists. Joshua threw the belt on the floor.

Your wrists were marked around where the belt held you tight, but you paid little heed to it, your hands were now free to tend to the bulge beneath his boxers, which you yanked down all too excitedly.

A shudder tore through your body when you saw his hard cock spring out of his boxers, his pinkish red tip dripping with precum. You instinctively reached out with a hand to touch, but your boyfriend seized it quickly.

"Josh? What are you doing?" you asked when he dragged you to the balcony, sliding the glass door open to welcome in a cold midnight breeze into the hotel suite.

"Do you still want me to fuck you in public? For everyone to know?" he asked, as you both stepped out to the balcony, wholly naked.

Your eyes locked with his briefly and you have him half a nod, a question lingering on the tip of your tongue. But you concluded that this was his intention all along when you first prompted him to record you and he declined.

"Hands on the railing, bunny," he instructed.

You gasped when he pressed the front of his body to your back, his hard cock wedging in your butt as you did what he told you, holding the cold metal railing of the balcony with a big breath.

The city was buzzing with nightlife, as you would expect during a friday night, the hotel was located at the heart of the city too, so you were quite literally facing another big building, you could see each light turning on as another was snuffed simultaneously.

"Nervous, bunny?" he asked in your ear, grabbing your hips and pulling them to his, and you bent over slightly for him, the movement felt almost natural. "I'll take that as a no," he muttered with a chuckle.

All the teasing, stimulating using his mouth and fingers did so that you were aching for more, your body pulsated for more. So when you felt the tip of his cock nudging at your entrance, you almost considered pleading with him to stop teasing you.

But as if reading your mind, he slid inside you in one go to his hilt with a low moan from his part and without any preamble, he started thrusting. He gave you no pause for you to adjust, to take in the sheer size of his cock stuffing you up so good it made you gasp.

"Fuck," you groaned through clenched teeth when his cockhead immediately found that glorious spot inside you.

"Do you like this, baby?" he muttered and you nodded with your head, biting your lower lip to avoid being heard. "Why so quiet now?"

You couldn't think of a good response at that, your mind going blank from the pleasure coursing through your body.

Joshua leaned over you, pressing his chest to your back without relenting on his deep thrusts. "Don't shy away now, baby," he grunted against your shoulder. "Wanna hear those pretty sounds you make for me."

He adjusted himself again pushing one hand against the small of your back, so you were now fully bent for him, tits hanging over the balcony railings, still holding with your hands. Your face burning up when you caught sight of the balconies below you, the cars far down on the street. The vulnerability you felt at that moment urged you to hide, to cover up.

But there was no shying away now, not when your boyfriend read your silence so well.

"Joshua!" you gasped loudly when he started plowing on you, the sound of his front slamming on your butt the only thing filling your ears.

"That's it, baby," you heard him say through a sigh making you turn to cast a look over your shoulder.

His darkened eyes were set on you, on your body bouncing on his hard and deep thrusts. Your boyfriend showed you a fucked out grin when he caught your eye looking over. Blinking slowly, you saw his throat bobbing when he swallowed back a moan. "Fuck, baby, hear that? You're gonna have an audience."

"Fuckfuckfuck," you screwed your eyes shut when you heard voices on the balcony directly below you.

You clamped down a hand on your mouth, trying to muffle your cries of pleasure as your boyfriend continued plowing on you with little care if you were seen or heard.

"No, no, no, don't hold back, bunny," he told you now. Then he raised a hand and brought it down on your ass harshly, drawing out a moan from his part when your walls clenched around him.

"Fuck!" you yelped loudly, the sound of your voice quieted down the fuss going on the balcony below. You held the rails with your hands. "Josh, please."

"You wanted me to fuck you like this, bunny," he reminded you, noticing the same thing you did. "Now everyone knows you're mine."

"God, fuck," you blurted, keeping an eye over the balcony in case someone thought of looking up, then you would need to hide.

"I want to hear you bunny," he groaned breathlessly, spanking you one more time, firmer this time, making your walls squeeze around him and you knew he liked it too when you heard a low guttural moan escape him.

"Arrgh, Joshua!" you cried in a high-pitch tone, your eyes welling up with tears, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and pleasure coursing through you.

"That's right, baby. It's me who's making you feel like this," you heard him grunt slightly.

"It's all you, Josh," you gasped, trying to close your eyes to the city around you, but the exposedness kept you alert.

"D'you like this baby?" he purred with a hollow laugh when you gave him a big nod with your head. "Yeah? My baby likes being fucked in the open, for everyone to see."

"Mmph, yeah, I do—fuck," you mewled out, but then you felt him tease around your hole again. A finger pushing in, slowly at first, but deeper this time, sending you a hot wave of pleasure. "Fuck, Josh. Babe, I–"

"Don't hold back," he reminded you, his voice strained and you knew he was close too.

You could hear hushed voices coming from the balcony below and muffled laughs between the slapping of Joshua's skin against yours. You tried so hard to contain yourself but couldn't under the amount of pleasure building on your body, making you gasp and mewl out incoherent, half thoughts.

"Joshua, I can't," you gasped. "I'm so—fuck, babe! So close," you blurted, your voice raw.

"Gonna come, baby? You're gonna come on this cock, hm?" he asked tauntingly and you didn't need to see him to know that he was smiling.

Your body was immersed in pleasure like never before. The feeling of his finger pushing gently in and out of your hole added a pressure to your release building up inside you.

"Yes! God, yes, 'm so close, Josh," you sighed a moan.

"Come, baby," he whispered impatiently now. "Come all over my cock."

Then the tension in your body snapped, then it was all sweet, sweet pleasure as you came undone, back arching, jaw going slack. "Josh, god, fuck, Joshua!" you cried out lewdly, your voice rang hoarse, breaking through the night.

"Fuck, I'm cumming too," he said through a breath, then a guttural moan followed, his fingertips digging on your hip so hard you knew it would leave marks.

But his hips continued to slam hard against you, pushing his cock deeper inside your pulsating walls as he came with you, fucking you through your long and very loud orgasm. You heard his raw moans over yours, felt his cum dripping down your thigh right after.

The thrusts came to a halt sloppily and gently removed his thumb from your hole when he felt you come down from your high. You had your eyes closed but you could hear the faint sounds of your little audience below, the hushed exchange of comments and small laughs.

Joshua's arms came to wrap your body, pulling you off the balcony rails in one sudden movement. He pressed you tightly against him, peppering your shoulder with kisses, you felt him breathing hard on your neck, prickling your skin.

"I love you, I love you," he whispered in your ear.

"I love you too, Joshua," you replied, leaning your head back on his shoulder.

"You did so good, bunny," he sighed before kissing your hair.

You closed your eyes weakly, the buzz of the city seemed to die when you caught the sound of his hard breaths, the stutter of his heartbeat vibrating against your body.

"Will you tell me what happened at the session?" you asked in a hum, lowering your head to kiss the forearm wrapping you by your shoulders.

"Yeah. Will you tell me what's going on with you?" he asked in return, still panting hard in your ear.

You gave him a small smile. "Yeah."

"In the shower?" he added tentatively.

"Definitely."

"Let's go," he mumbled, still breathless.

But he pulled out and motioned you over to his arms, which carried you bridal-style to the bathroom. Joshua didn't see you smiling happily at him, but you could see his features had relaxed considerably, his whole demeanor had changed. 

"I was upset with you," you mumbled out the words slowly with a sigh as he lowered you onto the floor. 

"Was?" your boyfriend inquired before turning to turn the shower on, sticking out a hand to test the water temperature. 

"Was," you reassured, nodding your head. 

"Why?" 

"I felt like I made an effort to come visit you, but you haven't had time for me at all," you replied, trying to mask your hurt feelings under a shrug. 

Joshua held out a hand for you as he stepped into the shower and you followed him. 

"I didn't stand you up on purpose," he muttered and then pouted. "You know that, right baby? I was busy." 

"I know, babe," you conceded softly. "Maybe it's time for us to accept that we're going to be busier than before."

"We'll manage," he asserted, grabbing one of your hands to kiss your knuckles, to then brace your arm over his shoulder, and you did the same with your other arm, encircling his neck loosely.

"I know we will, Josh," you pressed your lips in a smile. 

"Is that it? Or is there something else that made you upset?" he pried, reading your face. 

You paused, then shook your head slightly. "It's nothing," you whispered, using one hand to push his wet bangs back from his forehead. 

"Baby," he mumbled reproachfully. "We promised we would tell each other everything." 

"I'm just being dumb. I swear it's nothing serious," you insisted. 

"If that's the case, might as well tell me, right?" 

You rolled your eyes, he was right. "I felt a little jealous," you muttered reluctantly, avoiding his eyes. 

"What? Why? When?" he blurted and you darted a look back to his face to see him frowning. 

"Last night at the backstage," you started. "The friend you introduced to me last night, Thea."

"What about her, baby?" he smiled softly, the expression on his face changed from confusion to amusement. 

"She was cute. And you seemed to be pretty close too," you added sheepishly, trying to hold his gaze but it felt nearly impossible. 

"I barely even said anything to her," Joshua chuckled briefly, but not in a condescending way, his eyes looking at you fondly.

"But I felt something, okay?" you replied impishly, trying not to let your feelings show. 

"Bunny, she is an old friend," he explained with a shrug that denoted his easiness about the subject: "Whatever happened between us, happened years ago. It means nothing to me."

You pushed your eyebrows up. "So something did happen between you?"

"A long time ago," he showed you a small smile, lowering his gaze so his eyes seemed bigger. "It was just sex, nothing more."

"Are you sure?" you mumbled.

"Yeah, baby," he replied shortly, wrapping one arm around your waist. "Completely sure."

You were slowly connecting the dots, reading the glint in his dark eyes. You pushed a hand on his forehead, combing his long dark hair back. "Are you turned on by this, babe?"

Joshua nodded, running the tip of his tongue on his lower lip before sinking his teeth down on it.

You couldn't deny that you also felt aroused by his reassurance over you. You felt how much he wanted you, and you could see it in his eyes.

"Why were you jealous, bunny?" he asked, his half-lidded eyes reading the features of your face. "I barely even held a conversation with her for a minute."

You darted a look down on his body, only to find out that your boyfriend was hard already, his erection pressing on your lower tummy the moment he pulled you to his warm and wet body.

"Mm," you huffed, starting to feel a little lightheaded, the warmth, the steam, his amused eyes on you. "I just was. I didn't like the way she looked at you," you mumbled out.

Joshua reached down, a hand curving over your thigh and pulled it up to wrap around his hip, propping one foot over the rim of the bathtub, so your thigh was resting comfortably. Now with his hand freed, he wasted no time, grabbing his cock and guiding it to your core, sheathing himself inside you with a low moan from your part.

"Feel that?" he growled, resting his forehead on top of yours, droplets of water falling into your parted mouth. "You drive me crazy. No one has ever made me feel this way. No one but you."

Your eyelids fluttered uncontrollably, warm water ran down your faces but you couldn't tear your eyes from your boyfriend's face, his beautiful lips.

"Joshua," you moaned, holding onto his shoulders for more support as you started moving your hips in a gentle sway, back and forth, not hard nor fast. Just feeling him, completely hard inside you.

"I'm here, baby," he muttered with a ragged sigh. "I'm yours."

Adrenaline, dopamine, whatever it was, ran in a frenzied rush across your body, shocking you over how deeply fascinated the sound of those words made you feel.

"Mine," you replied entrancingly.

He nodded with a small movement. "No one else's. You're the only woman I want. The woman I love."

A broken moan escaped you and you pressed your crotch down to his hilt, unable to roll your hips to your own satisfaction. Joshua noticed your struggle, his hands gripping your hips tightly, forcing you to rut against him with more purpose.

"I'm here baby," he repeated with a low rasp. "I love you."

"I love you," you sobbed back.

"I never wanted someone the way I want you," he confessed, tilting his head forward, forehead bumping with yours as he continued to help you roll your hips on him. "I'm crazy about you, baby. You don't even know."

You tried to keep your eyes trained on him, on the beautiful features of his face, the droplets of water running down his face, his trembling eyelids, the parted lips as he let out breathy moans.

"Before you, I had given up the idea of finding someone for me. I didn't care, I thought I was fine being on my own," he whispered, and you could tell that he was trying hard to keep himself vulnerable.

You moved a hand from his shoulder to cup his face, Joshua leaned against your touch and he opened his eyes, blinking lazily to find yours.

"I want you so fucking much," he gave you a delirious laugh. "I am so in love with you."

You pushed his wet long hair away from his face so you could see his pretty face, ignoring the tears brimming in your eyes.

His pretty lips parted to let out a disgruntled moan, the sound reverberating inside the shower walls, sending a powerful shiver through your body.

"Fuck," Joshua breathed, his eyebrows knitting slightly. "Baby, come for me. I want you to come first," he said through a ragged breath, his hands moving your hips with more urgency now.

The emotions you felt at that moment had robbed you of your voice, so you could only nod at him in affirmation before removing the hand cupping his chin and tucking it between your body and his.

Joshua swallowed hard at the sight of you starting to rub your clit with fast swirls. "That's it, baby," he nodded, his voice was raspy now. His forehead dropped on yours again, breathing hard from a mixture of exhaustion and pleasure.

Your orgasm came fast, making you convulse slightly against his body, you tried to keep your eyes locked with his, as he watched your mouth part and your eyebrows knit together.

"Baby," you cooed, your voice surprisingly sweet and low. "I love you."

His eyes fluttered close, a shudder shaking his body, making his lower lip drop, a low raspy moan escaping him as he emptied himself inside you.

You clashed your mouth with his, your arms encircling his neck to hold onto him, the euphoric feeling of being so in love making you want to melt into his arms.

"I love you too, bunny," he gasped.

Joshua's hand blindly searched for the tap before shutting it off. His eyes read the features of your face with some thought. "I know we're both new to this. But we have to trust each other, baby," he muttered, leaning down to press a kiss on your forehead.

"I do trust you," you replied with a shy mutter.

His gaze softened, appearing to understand everything now and then he nodded quietly. "We understand each other, then," he whispered, turning around and reached out for a towel, which he wrapped around his waist and then he took another one, wrapping your body with it.

A small squeal left your mouth when he sloppily lifted you from the ground, carrying you bridal style again and to the bedroom. "Are you hungry? I can order room service."

You caressed his cheek, and smiled when you were showered by some droplets of water that fell from his wet hair and onto your face. "Can we order pancakes? And strawberry milkshakes?"

He smiled endearingly at you. "Anything my baby wants," he muttered, placing you gently on the bed. "I'll make the call and then we'll talk, okay?"

In the few minutes it took him to place the order, you got up from the bed and went looking for the T-shirt you were wearing earlier. It had been thrown to the side of the couch and you put it on in one go.

You were about to turn to head towards the bed when you were hugged from behind, the surprise sent a shock down your spine but you welcomed it with a short chuckle.

"Your pancakes will be here shortly, Ms. Hong," Joshua whispered in your ear, moving a hand that was pressing on your tummy to move back your wet hair to kiss your cheek.

"I like the sound of that," you replied with a sweet smile.

"The pancakes?" he taunted with a cheeky grin.

"Being Ms. Hong too," you said.

Joshua paused, almost as if he hadn't expected you to say it, let alone turn to look at him. He must have read the honesty and love in your face, because he remained speechless.

"Baby, are you serious?" he asked, his voice was rendered a mere whisper. A slow smile crept in his face and when you didn't immediately answer, he added: "Let me get the ring. Hold on."

"Shut up," you gasped with a nervous laugh. "You don't have a ring."

"How do you know that?" he pressed a feathery kiss in your lips, his pointer and middle finger caressing your cheek, holding your chin. "I might do."

You turned in his embrace, encircling his neck with your arms, his hands followed your movement, firmly placing them on your waist. "You need to slow down, Joshua Hong," you whispered, moving your hands to his neck, where you could feel his pulse, racing at your touch.

"In my defense, you started it," he replied, popping out his lower lip in a small pout but then broke into a smile.

"Marriage, kids..." you smiled anxiously when you were able to feel his pulse under your thumbs. "We haven't been in a relationship for longer than a month, Josh."

"And?" his pierced eyebrow shot up. "I love you. I've never been more sure about this."

"And I love you too, Joshua," you tilted your head to one side. "But maybe... maybe we need to wait a little."

"Fine," he replied with some reluctance. But you could still see the spark in his big eyes, the joy and the love written in them.

"I mean it," you said firmly and he smiled, giggling cheekily.

"Alright, alright," he nodded, leaning down to press a kiss in your lips, nudging the tip of your nose with his. "I'm still calling you Ms. Hong."

The next day you had to catch the earliest flight home, as you had been told that the last delivery of books for you to sign had arrived. So you called a taxi as soon as you woke up, as you had overslept and were late.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you at the airport?" Joshua asked, his brow furrowing as he looked at your face.

"I'm sure," you replied for the nth time. You were standing on the sidewalk, waiting for the taxi. A sudden jolt of nervousness twisted your stomach when you blurted out: "Were you able to clear your schedule for Friday night?"

Joshua's gaze softened, looking remorseful as he dropped his eyes to the ground and shook his head gently. "I'm sorry, bunny," he mumbled. "I won't be able to be there with you."

Your heart deflated and you were quick to give him a nod. "Okay," you whispered with an empty smile. "It's okay. Um, I'll call you when I get home, alright?"

The taxi stopped in front of you and you turned to reach out for the handle. Joshua's face contorted, his frown deepening when you were about to leave without saying something.

"Come here," he muttered before you could get into the car, cupping the back of your head to press his lips with yours. "I love you, baby."

"I love you, Joshua," you replied, and as the car drove away you wished you hadn't said it so dryly.

✮ a/n: hi there my lovelies! ◕⩊◕

i truly don't like to split this chapter but the word count really got out of hand here. i'll post the next part as soon as i finish writing it (yes, i'm still writing it don't look at me like that)

for those who wanted juicy angst, you'll find it in the next part! 👀🩵

oki doki. that's it for me now. i love you all, drink some water, use sunscreen.... i'm not asking you to reblog or comment or like, do whatever you want idgaf

haha i love yous! ( > 〰 < )♡

toodles!

next part

support my work🩵

✮ warnings: foul language, joshua is in love, dom joshua, pussy drunk joshua, tooth rotting fluff, body worshipping, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering, after care. pet names: baby, bunny (hers) › this is not proofread

✮ disclaimer: minors dni this post is intended for 18+ readers only. please have your age stated in your description and try not to look like a bot please 🙂.

3:14 AM

In the middle of the night, you stirred under the covers and turned over.

It was deadly silent, except for the soft breaths that your boyfriend exhaled while he slept beside you. It had been some hours since you both called it a night after your dinner party and went to bed, obviously not before he spoiled you before sleep.

Your hair was still humid from the mandatory shower you always took after sex, the reason why you woke up, because it was making you shiver.

You slowly sat up, coiling from the brutal change from the warmth beneath the covers, mostly emanating from your sleeping boyfriend and rose from your bed.

Rummaging your drawers silently, you looked for your favorite fuzzy socks without making too much noise and climbed back to bed to put them on with a content sigh.

You slid carefully back beneath the covers and upon lying back on your pillows, a warm hand snaked on top of your tummy, drawing a small gasp in surprise along with a shiver that rushed down your spine.

"Are you cold, baby?" Joshua asked in a low murmur.

"Yeah, a bit," you replied in the same manner.

"C'mere," he whispered, using the hand on your tummy to scoot your body closer by wrapping it around your waist.

He cuddled your body perfectly, enveloping it with his warmth and as soon as your body was pressed to his, he sighed softly and nuzzled his face against your humid hair.

"Happy birthday, bunny," he muttered softly, moving his face to press his lips against the apple of your cheek.

That made you smile. Joshua had been repeating those words over the night at any chance he could get. And it was finally your birthday, when the clock had struck midnight, your boyfriend was the first one to hug you and wish you a happy birthday.

"Thank you, Josh," you replied.

"Mm," he replied sleepily, then wrapped his arms around you and hugged you tightly.

You saw the features of his face relax and his arms around you slowly did too when he resumed sleeping peacefully. You nuzzled against his lean chest and breathed the smell of his skin in.

There were small hickeys on his throat, just below his Adam's apple that bobbed slightly when he swallowed.

And then,

"Are you having trouble falling asleep, baby?" Joshua muttered, his voice was honeyed, so sweet that it almost melted into your ear.

"Yes," you whispered.

It was mind-boggling how he read you so effortlessly. He knew you were awake still without even opening his eyes. You supposed, the many times you've shared a bed together, he has picked up a lot of things from you. That and, the fact that you're a terrible sleeper.

He opened his eyes to find yours, the ghost of a smile appearing on his lips before he asked: "Can I do something to help you sleep, baby?"

The question burned in your body, like a fiery bolt of lightning across you. You nodded. "Yes. Anything, please."

Even though he made love to you right after you arrived from the dinner party, you still felt hungry for more.

The smile grew on his face with a soft sigh. "My needy bunny," he muttered, bringing a hand to cup your chin and hold you still as he pressed his lips on yours.

Slowly, tauntingly, his tongue pushed against your lower lip as he kissed you, his lips then captured yours, eliciting a small moan from you.

The sound only egged him on, with a low grunt from him, his lips captured yours, intensifying the kiss and now your boyfriend was kissing you deeply, using his body to press your back against the mattress and he climbed on top of you skilfully.

"You're so pretty, baby," he muttered after parting from your lips to look at you with the most adoring look on his face. He ran a finger on your cheek. "You looked beautiful tonight."

You stifled a sigh. Your boyfriend was the most attractive man you've ever seen. And he was wearing nothing but his black boxers, his lean chest and abdomen bare for your view.

"Thank you, Josh," you laughed a little in a mixture of nervousness and joy.

Joshua smiled contentedly. "I like it when you call me that," he confessed, dipping his head to kiss you softly.

Then he pulled his body back, making the covers slide from his body and effectively from yours, falling in bundles behind his body. His hands grabbed your pyjama shorts and panties by the waistband and pulled them down your thighs, and got them off your ankles to then set them aside on the bed.

"Can I keep my socks on?" you asked just when he moved to take your top off.

"Of course, bunny," he muttered warmly. "Whatever my baby wants."

You smiled in sheer joy and sat up for him to remove your top off, undressing you completely. You leaned back on the pillows and looked at the man towering in front of you.

His eyes roamed on your naked body, revelling at the sight of you with such love and adoration written on his face that it made your heart almost jump out of your chest.

"So pretty, baby," he echoed his own words, but this time they sounded in utter awe.

He placed his hands on each side of your body and lowered his body so he could kiss you, he trapped your lower lip between his before deepening the kiss.

"I'm so lucky," he muttered entrancingly between kisses, pressing his lips against yours repeatedly.

You stifled a moan and wrapped your arms around him. "We both are," you whispered. "Lucky."

"But I'm luckier," he muttered and you felt him smile against your lips.

You laughed into his mouth just before you could say anything because he was kissing you again.

"Shuddup," he whispered when he parted to look at you.

"Don't tell me to shut up! It's my birthday," you whined and laughed at yourself.

Joshua had been spoiling you so much lately and you realized that he'd been doing it from a week back, much as if he wanted to take a whole week to celebrate your birthday.

That being said, he took you out for dinner randomly, without telling you in advance. He also showered you with pretty gifts—a jewellery set, a Cinnamoroll squishmallow, which made your stomach twist in utter cuteness from both your boyfriend knowing you'd like this and the new addition to your squishmallow army.

The most recent of your birthday gifts he gave you was a bracelet he made with his own hands. It had your favourite colors and it was so pretty and carefully thought of that you almost didn't believe him at first when he told you he made it himself.

Well, that and the fact that your boyfriend likes to joke around with you sometimes.

And besides the gifts, the dinners, he also gave you a lot of attention. He'd been going an extra mile to make you feel good and loved to the point that he almost made you cry out of sheer joy.

But Joshua was all yours. That was the biggest birthday gift you could ever ask for.

"Mm, don't get bratty, baby," he muttered gruffly into your mouth as the kisses slowly got more heated. "It might be your birthday, but I could still cuff you to the bed."

Your stomach lurched at the sound of that. It is true that you enjoyed being cuffed to the rails of the headboard of the bed, you liked to be helpless while he pleasured you to the point you're rendered breathless and teary eyed.

"Would you like that, bunny? Should I get the cuffs?" he asked playfully, his lips pressed a wet kiss on the underside of your chin, trailing down your throat.

You swallowed thickly when your skin started to prickle, causing your nipples to harden too.

When you didn't answer, he sucked on your skin quite harshly, just on the spot where your collarbones join, making you bristle under his body and your arms tighten around his shoulders.

"No, I–," you stammered. "I'll be good, Josh."

"Hm," he hummed thoughtfully, but you knew that he was having his fun teasing you like this.

Then he ran his tongue flatly on one of your nipples, just before wrapping his mouth around it, suckling at your sensitive bud, humming again but this time in satisfaction.

"Joshua," you moaned softly when your skin prickled again, and your hand shot up and found his nape, your fingers grazed his scalp, eliciting a moan from his part. "God, Josh."

He removed his mouth from your pebbled nipple with a loud smacking noise and then turned to tease your other nipple in the same manner, while his hand came up to palm your recently licked breast, smearing his drool all over your skin.

When he finished suckling your nipple, his hands bulged up your tits, pressing them together to then bury his face in them to kiss and suck your skin.

"You have the prettiest tits, baby," he hummed against your skin entrancingly, kissing the swell of each, to then sucking lovebites right beside your areolas, where no one would see except for himself.

"Josh!" you mewled when he sucked your skin so harshly, the feeling shot right between your legs, making you writhe under his body.

"All mine," he pressed soft and wet pecks on top of each hickey, looking at the reddening spots, feeling content at his work.

You smiled teasingly, the snort you made with your nose made him look up and see your smug expression.

"What?" his pierced eyebrow quirked up. "Is it not true, baby?"

"It is true," you replied and then added. "There's no need to feel possessive of me anymore, Josh. I'm yours."

His hands stopped bulging up your tits and settled on each side of your ribcage, his elbows supporting his weight still.

Looking straight to your eyes, Joshua pulled out his tongue and glided the tip on your nipple, swirling around it only to watch you part your mouth and let out a whiny moan. Then, the corners of his lips rose into a smile, while still teasing your nipple with his tongue out.

"Fuck—Josh," you pleaded, the muscles of your inner thighs clenched on both his sides.

And he felt it.

"D'you like that, bunny?" he asked, still looking directly at you as he moved his mouth to tease your other nipple with the wet tip of his tongue.

You felt your skin prickle before you saw it get bumpy all over. "Yes," you whispered.

"Would you like to feel this on your pussy?" he asked just before he used his tongue to flicker your nipple. You paid attention to the movement of his pointed tongue and imagined that on your clit.

You gulped hard and nodded eagerly.

He pushed his eyebrows up, as if waiting for your verbal response.

"Yes, please, Joshua," you replied.

"Will you stop saying nonsense and let me eat you out, then?" he asked and smiled at you playfully.

You watched him slightly agape and flinched when he grazed at the swell of your breast with his teeth, egging you to answer.

"Wh-what nonsense?" you blurted, feeling a little lost.

"I won't stop feeling possessive of you, bunny," he rolled his eyes at his own sentence. "Not until I put a ring on your finger."

"Josh!" you squealed as your stomach lurched, thighs clenching all at the same time.

"Baby!" he replied, mocking your tone of reprimand with a laugh.

"Stop saying that!" you whined.

"Why, you don't wanna marry me anymore?" he asked before he continued his trail of wet kisses on the lower part of your sternum and down your tummy.

"O-of course I do," you stuttered nervously from both the big question and the fiery tingling sensation on your lower abdomen.

"So?" he egged you on, his lips reaching your mound.

"Josh," you squirmed, watching him pout his lips to suck lightly on your very sensitive skin.

"Mm?" he pushed his eyebrows up again, his eyes trained on yours.

"You-you saying that makes me a little crazy," you confessed with an anxious stutter.

"I know," he replied before kissing your inner thighs, making you gasp pathetically. "I like it."

"Why?" you breathed out, eyelids fluttering uncontrollably when you felt his lips grazing on your inner thigh.

He shrugged ever so slightly. "I like to imagine what your reaction will be when I do it for real."

"So that's why you torture me?" you asked, trying to smile at him to make him understand that you were joking, but instead you sounded completely flustered.

He lifted his face from the apex of your thighs, a question written on his furrowed brow. "Torture you?" he repeated and then smiled. "You're the one torturing me by making me wait."

"I meant it as a joke," you explained, and pointed to your abandoned and throbbing pussy with your eyes. "Please?" you urged him to continue.

"Do you think it's a joke that I want to propose to you?" he asked teasingly, but his tone was everything but.

Before you could give and answer, he pushed his tongue flatly between your folds, making you moan with your eyes screwed shut instantly.

"Fuck—Josh!" you cried out, the tips of your fingers grazing his scalp before grabbing his hair.

"Mm?" he replied and lifted his gaze as his tongue moved up to tease your clit in the same form he did to your nipples, slowly gliding the pointed tip of his tongue around your clit.

"M-more, give me more, please," you pleaded, propping your body on your elbows to look at him, his tongue doing the same motion, swirling around your sensitive bud to then flicker the pointed tip of his tongue side to side, but slowly.

He paused, "Answer the question," he instructed, his eyes focused on your face, knowing full well that it made you a little crazy, too.

"No—I don't think it's a joke," you stammered and pushed your hips up ever so slightly towards his mouth to get more pressure of his tongue on your clit.

Joshua groaned, moving the hands that were previously parked on your thighs and forced your hips onto the mattress, making you yelp.

"Josh, come on," you whined when he continued teasing you, now his hands holding you in place by your hips.

"Mm?" he hummed.

"Faster?" you pleaded and then added innocently: "Please, Josh. It's my birthday."

That made him laugh, he stopped teasing your clit with his tongue to give out a broad smile as he chuckled with his whole body.

"Oh, bunny. You think you're so slick," his pierced eyebrow shot up briefly.

But then he moved his mouth back to your cunt, the tip of his tongue pushing your throbbing clit gently, slowly, swirling around it to watch you squirm and hear your drawn out whimpers.

"Please, Josh," you whined and clenched your jaws tight when the tip of his tongue started flicking your clit side to side again, but refraining from applying the right amount of pressure of his tongue against your throbbing clit.

"Fuck, Josh!" you gasped when the sensation was a little more over a graze on your oversensitive bud, causing your thighs to begin trembling on the sides of his face.

Joshua smiled in response, his tongue still out and teasing you. The image was lewd, he looked so fucking hot that it only added to the teasing.

"Joshua, please," you whined again and bit your lip to keep yourself from whimpering lewdly.

Though you were sure the slight teasing from his tongue on your clit could bring out an orgasm from you. And it appeared that Joshua knew it too, but was trying to draw out your climax by teasing you some more.

"I,—I'm close," you muttered with a whiny tone. "Fuck, Josh, I'm cumming."

He blinked at you slowly, almost as if saying "go ahead," and that was all you needed to come on his tongue. You threw your head back and let out a cry of pure bliss, your whole body trembling under his strong grip.

Breathy moans escaped you as your chest started to heave, but his tongue didn't relent on your cunt, flicking your clit gently but at a steady pace. The worry of waking the neighbors a long, distant thought.

"God, Josh," you sighed heavily as you came down from your high and slumped down on your pillows, thinking it was over.

But oh, you thought wrong. Joshua stopped the flicking motions of his tongue on your clit, only to give broad strokes from your entrance and up your folds, drinking in your arousal with a low moan on his part.

Your orgasm was so intense that it left your walls fluttering around nothing. You gasped when you felt the first pulse in your entrance and it appeared that Joshua felt it on his mouth too.

"Mm," he hummed softly and stopped licking between your pussy lips to then push two fingers inside your fluttering walls. "You have the prettiest pussy," he muttered softly as his long fingers massaged your warm walls.

"Mm-hmph?" you hummed mindlessly with a tiny whine when he pulled out his two middle fingers covered in your slick and glided them up your folds and pinched your swollen clit between them, making you gasp again.

"D'you like that?" he asked gruffly, his eyes trained on the features of your face as he started rubbing his fingers up and down, pinching your clit in between.

The sensation was nearly harsh and it threatened to overstim you soon, but it was also so abundantly sweet in pleasure. You writhed your hips a little bit and nodded.

"Sof-softer? Please," you stammered and bit your lip from moaning when his fingers moved your clit around in circles.

"Anything you want, baby," he muttered gently before rubbing your clit with the pads of his fingers in a circle motion, softer and in a steady pace.

"God, Joshua," you sighed a moan and your eyelids fluttered close. The sensation provided by his two middle fingers on your clit was mind-numbing, you felt the pleasure from it everywhere; on your face, between your legs.

"Mm?" you heard him hum.

"Keep going, please," you whined. "Faster."

You heard a sigh and opened your eyes to see him smiling adoringly at you.

But the motion on his fingers picked up some speed, making your thighs clench and begin to shake a little as you felt your body nearing another sweet release. Your body tensed up as well instinctively, as if trying to recoil away from the pleasure it felt.

"Breathe," you heard your boyfriend remind you softly and you slowly took in a breath.

And just when you breathed out, you let out a long moan in pleasure, coming undone on his fingers, his mouth kissing your inner thighs, grazing your skin with his teeth as you came harder than before, chanting his name over and over until you gasped for air.

Panting and shaking, you opened your eyes and found your boyfriend still pressing kisses on your thighs, your mound and lower tummy before he took his fingers covered in your arousal to his mouth to lick his fingers clean.

Your inner thighs were smeared with your arousal, as you would soon find out when you came down from your high. So wet that in fact you could feel the bed sheets were wet beneath your butt too.

You smiled to yourself and propped your body on your elbows again, his eyes lifted to lock with yours.

You ran your fingers through his hair. "You do know I want to marry you, right?" you asked him, still feeling a bit breathless.

Joshua smiled before moving his lips slick in your arousal to kiss your inner thigh. "Mm, not to sure, should I get the ring right now?"

Your stomach lurched yet again, making your body jump on the bed slightly. "Y-you don't have a ring yet, right? Do you?"

"I don't know," he muttered before grazing your inner thigh with his teeth. "I might."

You rolled your eyes. "Joshua, be serious," you sounded a bit nervous.

"So you wouldn't say yes right now?" he asked and a small smirk appeared on his lips when he saw your dismayed expression. "Relax, baby," he muttered in an eased manner. "I'm just teasing you a bit."

"Oh m'god," you sighed and slumped back in your pillows.

"Are you ready to sleep, baby?" he asked as he grabbed your pyjama bottoms and panties.

"Yeah, I think I am," you sighed, blissfully tired and looked at your boyfriend. He held your panties for you to hook your ankles and lifted your hips as he helped you put your pyjamas on.

You both knew you were perfectly fine to do it yourself. But lately Joshua had been doting on you so much that you didn't question him as he did the same with your pyjama bottoms and when you sat up for him to put your top on.

He smiled cutely at you when your hair got ruffled as he put your top on and pressed a loving kiss on your forehead.

"Done," he patted your thigh affectionately and pointed to the door behind him. "Bathroom."

You groaned. "I don't want to," you whined, sitting up in the bed.

"Go baby," he laughed. "I need to change the sheets."

You were reminded then of the small wet stain below your body. "Oh, right."

"Do you want me to carry you there?" he asked softly, seeing that your thighs were still shaking a bit.

"No, I'm fine," you replied, scooting to the edge of the bed and hurried to the bathroom.

Your boyfriend had this routine of sorts, which consisted in taking care of your needs after he dommed you. He'd usually run a warm shower and inspect your wrists for any damage done, he'd cuddle you and ask you questions about your wellbeing.

But in this case, since you had already showered, and there was no bondage, no impact play, no need for the routine. Except for ensuring you'd go pee, of course. After you cleaned yourself up, you came back to your bedroom.

Joshua was finishing making the bed, the ruined sheets were on one corner of the bedroom floor. Your first instinct was to pick them up and immediately put them on the washing machine and program the cycle for the following morning.

"Leave that," Joshua said, spotting your intentions right on. "Get in here."

He nodded back to the bed and you lied down yet again as he climbed beside your body.

"Do you need anything, bunny?" he asked. "I can bring you water, or food if you're hungry."

You shook your head and he opened his arms for you to scoot right over to be wrapped in a warm hug. "I'm good, thank you Josh."

He cuddled your body under the covers, using his body's position behind you to kiss your nape and your hair.

"I'm so lucky to have you, baby," he mumbled against your ear, bringing a hand to run his fingers through your hair, gently and carefully.

"I'm lucky too," you whispered, grabbing the hand that was below your body to kiss his knuckles.

You heard him smile behind you, still running his fingers through your hair, the rhythmic motion slowly driving you to sleep, eyelids falling heavier by the second.

"I love you, bunny," he whispered.

"I love you too, Josh," you replied, feeling your heart beating at every word.

"Feels like you were made for me," he murmured.

You hummed softly in response, your heart fluttering erratically in your chest. "I am," you muttered, mustering up some boldness.

"Are you, bunny? Made for me?" he sighed running a hand from your shoulder and down your arm, caressing you gently.

"Yeah," you breathed. "With or without a ring."

He paused, but his hand didn't stop caressing your arm. "You know I'm not as possessive as before," he told you thoughtfully.

"I know," you conceded after some thought.

"The least I want you to think is that I want to own you or something like that by marrying you," he continued, and you could tell from his tone that he was falling asleep too, even if his hand was still stroking your arm.

"Josh," you muttered sweetly with a small laugh. "I don't think that!"

"I just want to make you happy. Give you the whole world," he whispered.

"You already make me happy, Josh," you muttered and pressed your body back against his. "You made me the happiest tonight."

"Mm, then I've still yet to give you the world," he muttered after some seconds.

You laughed and turned only to press a happy kiss to his smiling lips. "Baby steps, Mr. Hong."

He nodded in agreement. "Baby steps, Ms. Hong."

✮ a/n: so this is the first time i get a request (if it was indeed a request lol) but lemme know, do you like this? should i accept more requests?

so where exactly does this fall in the city lights timeline?

→ this will happen after the events of episode 8, which i hope i can post soon. i know i could've written something outside of the city lights canon, but i want everything i write and post to be within the same universe and what can i say, i got carried away

let me know what you think! likes, reblogs and comments are wholeheartedly appreciated! my ask box is always open!

now, i need to go back to writing guilty pleasures pt. 2!!!

i love youuuu ૮₍｡´ᴖ ˔ ᴖ`｡₎ა ♡

toodles

© RIGHTS RESERVED TO HANNIEWEEN I DO NOT ALLOW TRANSLATIONS, CONTINUATIONS, REIMAGINATIONS OF MY WORKS OR THEIR REPOSTING ON OTHER WEBSITES.

click here to join my taglist | buy me a coffee? ♡

✮ warnings: alcohol use, dubcon: reader is drunk and joshua helps her change to pjs, smut with plot, big dick Joshua, dom Joshua, dirty talk, foul language, praise kink, somewhat inexperienced reader, multiple sex scenes, fingering (f. receiver), oral sex (f, m) guided blowjob, cum swallowing, protected sex, squirting, brat taming: bondage, orgasm control (f), use of toys and overstimulation (f), dumbification, multiple orgasms (f, m), pet names: baby, pretty girl, princess, sweetheart, bunny (hers)

part ii

"Zero survival instincts," Yen scoffed, "None. Out the window."

"Yen, I'm fine," you insisted. "Nothing bad happened."

She sent you an irritated look. "What if he was a serial killer?"

You rolled your eyes. "He's not, Yen. He's just my neighbor."

"Are you serious right now?" she asked. "The least you could've done was sending me a text: 'hey yen, i'm inviting my neighbour over to fuck me into the next day, don't worry, he's not going to turn me into jerky'."

You laughed at the crude language, your best friend simulating typing on an imaginary phone.

"Shhh, keep it down, Yen," you muttered when you saw people from the tables around you glance at you.

Sitting at a cozy table for two in a charming bar, the atmosphere around him was quiet, with the soft glow of candlelight. The surrounding tables were occupied by couples, either engaged in a romantic conversation or trying to start one.

In the quiet atmosphere, your table stood out as the noisy one, occupied by two women who were indulging in the warmth of alcohol and pastries.

And, truth be told, were quite drunk on red wine.

"If he killed you at least I'd have something to tell the police," she continued with another roll of her eyes.

"But he didn't kill me. We just had sex, that's it."

She looked around your table, and suddenly you could sense that she was really invested. "How was it, then?"

You felt a sudden twinge in the apex of your thighs from just the memory of your last.

"It was so good," you sighed, and leaned on the table. "It was really really good, Yen. The best I had in my life, I think. Yeah, definitely."

"Wow, damn," she muttered, a sly grin appearing on her round face. "Not gonna lie. I'm jealous."

You chuckled. "I'm actually kind of surprised that he accepted, though," your brow furrowed, feeling your cheeks grow hotter in the mixture of being drunk and flustered at the memory. "He is so hot, Yen. Like really, really hot."

"Okay, okay. I believe you," she scoffed. "You know, when I told you to commit to writing sex scenes, I didn't mean to go methodical," she gave you a look and then smiled slyly again.

"What, I felt like I needed to experience the real thing before writing pages about it," you shrugged.

"That's a lame excuse," she said as she swirled her wine glass in the air.

"I think it's working," you leaned your cheek against your palm, your elbow propped up on the table.

"Oh, oh. Can I read the product of your little adventure?" her eyes widened.

"God, no," you recoiled at the thought. "This is just for... inspiration. There's still a lot of things I want to try before finishing the manuscript."

"What—wait a minute," she held up her hand. "Are you going to keep seeing him?"

You blinked. "Yeah, I didn't tell you?" your brow furrowed.

"Do you mean to tell me that you'll be fucking your neighbour until you finish the manuscript?!"

"Yen, it's fine," you shushed. "It's just sex. There's nothing to worry about."

Nothing to worry about. Except there was hardly anything that could take your mind off the memory.

As you walked to the interior of your building after being dropped off by Yen, all you could keep thinking was to knock on his door. Just go, knock and he'd know. That was your deal.

You have been wanting to do that all week. But you were reluctant about it because you didn't want to come across as needy.

It was now Wednesday, three nights after that night with Joshua. You had slept together, and in the following morning he left.

You stumbled out of the elevator and into the hallway, feeling so tipsy that you almost took a full minute to be certain of which of the doors led to your apartment.

The device on your door was a smart-lock that simply functioned as a key. You didn't bring your keys, so you entered your six number combination.

The beeping noise from the smart-lock of your door indicated that you had only two more attempts left before being locked out of your apartment for the next hour.

You hummed, attempting to keep steady, but couldn't ignore the gentle sway of your body from side to side. Biting your lower lip, you struggled to concentrate, but the effects of the wine bottle were swiftly taking hold.

With a click of your tongue, you stepped back to double check you were standing in front of your door. You were.

"C'mon. You can do this," you hissed to yourself as you tried to enter the combination of your smart lock.

Beep beep. Wrong again.

One attempt left.

"What," you whispered to your lock again.

You tried to rest your head on your door for more stability, but when your forehead landed a loud thud resounded on the hallway.

"Ow," you winced.

Maybe you should ask for help.

No. You can do this. Is a simple stupid lock.

The sound coming from the door next to yours startled you. But you made no attempt to move your forehead from your door, expecting to see either Joshua or his roommate, the latter you haven't met yet.

But the sweet voice calling your name from the next door made you want to sink into the ground and never be seen again.

Joshua doesn't need to see you like this, you said to yourself.

"Are you okay?" Joshua asked, and you jolted to find him next to you, his eyes examining your drowsy ones.

"Um, I can't enter my combination," you mumbled as one of your hands pushed the hair from your face.

"You're drunk," he realized then, his fingers taking your chin for his eyes to survey you, a small smile appearing on his lips. "What did you have?"

Your cheeks were already flushed from the wine, but you could swear a different kind of warmth started burning beneath your skin the exact moment he touched you.

Before you could answer to his question, you take a brief look at him. Joshua wore an oversized gray plaid shirt, a black t-shirt underneath, and light gray sweatpants. A cap adorned his head, hiding his dark hair. You came to the conclusion that, whatever he was wearing, he would no doubt look hot.

Your mouth went dry. "Jus' a bottle of wine," you muttered, trying to brush off his hand but not succeeding.

"D'you have your keys?" he said as you drunkenly tried to enter your combination to no avail. His large hand swatted yours before you could enter any numbers on the pad.

"Keys," you repeated. "Don't think so."

"Let me help you before you lock yourself out," he hushed with his cute smile. "Tell me your combination."

The combination to your smart lock escaped your lips, trusting him with it completely without a second thought. He entered the combination and the lock beeped again, the small light blinking green.

"There you go," he muttered.

"Thank you," you whispered, pushing your door open and turning around to see his face one last time before going to bed.

You opened your mouth, feeling a strange tickling under your skin as you faced him.

"I uh..."

When no other words came out, Joshua smiled softly with a sigh and entered your apartment with you.

"Come on, princess. I'll take you to bed," he muttered and closed the door behind him, taking your hand gently and pulling you to the interior of your apartment.

"Mmkay," you cooed, letting him drag you to your bedroom.

In the darkness of your apartment, you saw him dressed in a way that was atypical of his usual style, almost as if he had thrown on whatever he found first–

"You look cute with a cap," you blurted before you could even stop yourself.

"You think so, princess?" he replied and took his cap off to put it on your head. "You look cute too."

A giggle bubbled up in your chest. "Caps make m'ears look bigger," you slurred.

As you entered your bedroom, you removed the cap from your head and, at the same time, stumbled upon a pile of forgotten clothes scattered on the floor. You vaguely remembered throwing them aside while you were looking for something to wear for tonight.

"Careful," he mumbled, catching you before you hit the ground. "You're tripping with those big ears of yours, bunny."

You burst into high-pitched laughter, which resembled a kid's. As if you had just heard the funniest joke. Joshua smiled as he heard you, an endearing expression on his face.

It made you feel fuzzy inside.

"Why did you drink tonight? What was the occasion, I mean," he asked as he helped you sit on your bed.

He crouched before you and started removing your shoes. Every action was carefully done, nothing was rushed, everything was carried out with delicacy.

"I went out with my best friend to this really fancy bar," you told him with an air of contentment.

"What's your friend's name?" he asked almost a second later.

Then, in the back of your mind where you still had some lucidity, you gathered that he was trying to keep you fully awake as he helped you climb your high bed.

"Yen, Yena," you mumbled.

With a sudden movement, your body fell back against the soft mattress and you gasped. Your head spun rapidly and the rush that ran through your body caused you to giggle.

"Careful there," he cautioned, just as he was taking your socks off. You could also hear him laughing a bit.

"Are you laughing at me?" you whined, your hands instinctively covering your warm cheeks as giggles continued to escape.

"I would never, princess. You're cute when you're drunk," he replied simply.

"Mmm, you don't think I'm ridiculous?" your voice was muffled by the hands burying your face.

"Why would I think that?" you heard him ask.

"Dunno," you mumbled sheepishly. "'m really drunk, J'shua," you slurred.

"I know, bunny," he chuckled. "Where are your pjs?"

You slowly uncovered your face to see him standing before your bed.

"Second drawer," you replied pointing to the drawers next to your bed, feeling your cheeks blaze.

There was no real reason to feel this shy, considering that Joshua had already seen every inch of your naked body. But the idea of him taking care of you took on new meaning in your mind. It made you feel closer to him.

"Oooh, what do we have here?" he said with a cheeky grin.

Then he pulled a pink lace thong, holding it up in the air with his fingers.

"Joshua!" you gasped. "That's not the second drawer!"

He giggled playfully. "Oops, my bad," he said, but continued rummaging on your stuff, pulling out a see-through mesh red bra. "This is really nice, bunny. Will you wear it next time for me?"

You groaned helplessly, but before you could come up with a quippy response, his eyes widened in surprise.

"Princess, you didn't tell me you had toys," he said with a surprised tone, dropping the playful act.

"Stop," you whined with a laugh and turned to crawl across your large bed toward him.

Before you could even make it to the other side of your bed, you stumbled and your face collided with the mattress, making you erupt into uncontrollable laughter.

You heard his genuine laugh resonate through the room, causing a flutter in your stomach, followed by the muffled noise of the drawer shutting close.

"Alright, alright. Time for bed," he announced, and a hand gently flipped you on the mattress. He sat on the edge of the bed next to your body. "I'm going to take your top off, okay?"

You nodded a little too eagerly, and that made him smile with a shake of his head.

"Now don't get any ideas, sweetheart," he said.

Then his hands grabbed the hem of the cute top you wore to your date with your best friend.

As the top came off and you were left under his gaze, you felt as if your whole skin was on fire, every inch tingling with an overwhelming sensation.

But he remained silent. You tried to make out the expression on Joshua's face, while he was deeply focused on his task, giving no signals that he wanted to do more with your body.

"Bra on or off?" he asked softly.

"Off," you whispered, feeling a sudden impatience take over your mind and body despite the effects from the wine still strumming on your ears.

"Kay," he replied in the same tone. "Arch your–"

You instantly arched your back for him before he could even finish the sentence. His eyes examined your face again with a hint of curiosity. 

"I'm starting to think you're enjoying this, princess," he said with a cheeky smile.

When a hand slid behind your back, it was then that you realized he was keeping his touch on your skin at a minimum. Joshua unclasped the pretty bra you wore, his fingers removing the straps from your shoulders without touching your skin.

Something sparked in you when his gaze wandered over your naked skin. Darkened eyes marveled at your tits as your nipples hardened from the bite of cool air and the skin around them bumped helplessly.

A small silent whine bubbled in your chest, your whole body tingling, needing to be sated by his touch. You gulped hard. He noticed.

"Do you want me to continue?" he asked with a gentle tone, so low you barely heard it above the buzzing in your eardrums.

"Yes," you whispered eagerly, looking at his eyes. "I trust you, Joshua."

At that, Joshua stopped and contemplated you. The momentary silence made you wonder if you had said something wrong, and you waited for his response.

But he just booped the tip of your nose.

"Sit up," he commanded with his sweet voice.

He extended his hands out to you to help you reincorporate in your bed so that he could put the top of your pyjamas on your body.

When you lay back on the soft covers of your bed, a sigh came out of you, revealing all the emotions that were bubbling up in your chest.

But Joshua interpreted it differently.

"Don't fall asleep yet. I need you awake for this," he urged with his sweet voice.

For a moment you thought that maybe you looked way too drunk. Perhaps, you felt better than you looked: the sluggishness of your limbs with every movement you made, the heavy eyelids, the clumsy tingling in your cheeks and mouth every time you spoke: all symptoms caused by the wine.

"I'm not sleeping," you said as you blinked slowly.

"Good girl," he muttered.

But the rest of your body was ablaze, desperate for his touch. You inhaled deeply, trying to fill your chest with something other than the desperate need for him.

The room was spinning. Was it spinning a minute ago? Who knows.

"I feel dizzy," you mumbled in a whiny tone.

"Hang on, princess. I'm almost done, okay?" he instructed. Still, you could hear that warmth in his voice. 

With careful fingers, he undid the zipper and button of your pants. You lifted your hips from the bed for him to slide them down your legs effortlessly.

Joshua was piling your clothes carefully on the foot of the bed, you noticed. He folded your pants in half and when he turned to you, he surveyed the lower half of your body, partially naked before him.

His darkened eyes found yours, an unspoken question written in them.

"Off," you whispered before he could ask.

A heavy sigh left him.

"Eyes on me, baby," he instructed again.

Then he removed your white lace thong, with so much care that his fingers didn't even graze your skin. He didn't skip a beat when he was already grabbing the matching bottoms of your bunny pyjamas, sliding them up your legs.

You smiled contently and made a move to sit up on the bed. "Need to wash," you muttered suddenly.

He smiled at the clumsiness to which you lowered yourself to the floor. "C'mon," he extended his hands to you and when you stood, you stumbled backwards a bit.

With his strong hands he helped you get to the bathroom without staggering and stood outside the door in case you needed help with anything, but still giving you the privacy to tend to your needs.

Afterwards, Joshua helped you to get under the sheets and covers of the bed, tucking you in, and then he bent down and placed a sweet kiss on your forehead.

"Such a gentleman," you cooed with a weak smile.

"Here to help," he replied with a pressed smile. "Sleep now, princess. I'll see you tomorrow, m'kay?"

You reached for his hand before he could distance himself any further, stopping him in his tracks.

"Don't go," you mumbled.

He sat back down slowly and placed his hand on your tummy, the mere weight of his hand and the warmth seeping through the fabric of your pyjamas made you repress a whine.

"Sleep with me?" you slurred, clenching the hand that was still clasped by yours.

"You're drunk, sweetheart. I'll come by tomorrow," he said and patted your tummy softly.

"Please? I promise I won't try anything," you mumbled.

You felt your eyes involuntarily welling up a little. You knew it was partly due to the effects of alcohol, yet you also suspected it was because of the emotions you'd been accumulating over the past couple of days.

Looking conflicted, a small guttural groan escaped him.

"Fine," he groaned in defeat.

A smile of victory crept up your face as you did what he asked. He stood from your bed to remove his shoes and the grey shirt he was wearing. You watched him carefully place his stuff on the armchair in the corner of your bedroom.

He lay down beside you under the sheets, approaching you cautiously.

"How do you feel?" he mumbled.

"Better," you sighed softly.

"Still dizzy?" he asked, his eyes hopeful.

"Mm nope," you mumbled, 

Eyeing him shyly, you scooted toward his body and nuzzled softly on the side of his shoulder, feeling his warmth.

"Thank you for taking care of me, Joshua," you said as the scent of his cologne invaded your already overwhelmed senses.

An arm slid beneath your body, pulling you closer to his chest.

"Don't mention it," he replied.

"I didn't ruin any plans, right?" your head snapped back to look at him.

His fingers trailed on the side of your arm, causing goosebumps on your skin at their wake.

"Not really, no," he hummed. "I was thinking about you, actually."

"You were?" you asked in an embarrassingly high pitch tone.

"I wanted to see you, princess," he cooed, moving his head on the pillows to look you in the eye.

A flutter in your stomach took your focus away. Joshua wanted to see you. The way he made it sound was almost as if he missed you.

"Was thinking of knocking on your door."

Oh.

That had an entirely different meaning. Knocking on your door would mean that he wanted to have sex with you.

"You..." you mumbled awkwardly. "D'you still want to?"

Something shifted in your brain. He might have just missed your body, but it was still enough to rouse something within you. The alcohol offered little help, but instead intensified your body's every reaction.

The tingling in your face, the rush of warmth that washed through you, pooling between your legs.

"Definitely not, princess," he laughed softly, putting your ideas to rest. "I won't touch you like this," he finalized sternly.

You let out a whine that sounded more like a childish cry, burying your face in his chest and sighing in frustration.

"It's bad manners to have sex with people who are not sober, baby," he explained, his tone was not condescending, but almost sweet or caring.

"But what if I want to, Joshua," you mumbled, your flushed face still buried in the warmth of his hard chest.

"I'm not going to fuck you no matter how much you beg," he said with a small chuckle.

"But I wan' you to," you whined against his chest.

You were so close to his chest that you felt the strumming of his heart, heard the small sigh leave his body. Your fist scrunched up on his t-shirt.

"You told me you wouldn't try anything, princess," he reminded you sternly.

Joshua took the hand that has balled into a fist, grabbing on his shirt and laced his fingers with yours in an attempt to soothe you.

"Mm, it's jus'—I need you," you mumbled, sneaking a glance in his eyes.

"I'm here, bunny," he muttered softly.

"But I've been wanting to see you all week," you said with a sigh.

Your face grew hotter on your drunken confessions, but you forced yourself to make eye contact with him despite the daze from the wine.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked while the hand that grabbed yours played with your fingers.

"I didn't want you to think I'm needy," you mumbled sheepishly, still trying to hold eye contact, but your eyes were shifty. 

"What?" he asked with a feigned tone of surprise. "I thought we had already established the other night that you're needy. Like, really needy," he laughed.

You scoffed and hid your flushed face on his hard chest again, but he pulled back, his fingers on your chin forcing you to face him.

"I'm only joking, princess," he smiled reassuringly. "Whenever you want to you can let me know."

You opened your mouth but before you could protest, he added:

"As long as you're sober."

You let out a bashful sniffle and pouted.

"Tell you what: if you go to sleep now, I'll give you whatever you want tomorrow. How about that?" he asked, looking down to find your eyes, he let go of your hand and stroked the side of your face softly.

Your eyelids fluttered under his touch. "Whatever I want?" you asked, looking at his rosy lips and then his eyes.

"That's right, baby. Whatever you want," he conceded.

"Mmkay," you mumbled.

You relaxed in his embrace, letting go of your demands at that very moment.

"Good girl," he muttered, pressing his lips on your forehead for a long second before resting his head on the pillow next to yours.

Your cheeks flushed and a fluttering sensation invaded your chest.

"G'night, Joshua," you mumbled a second before you closed your eyes and fell asleep.

The following morning, you woke up to a headache drilling in the back of your head.

You groaned in pain, ears ringing as you opened your eyes to only wince in pain at the faint morning light filtering through the parted door of your otherwise blackout dark bedroom.

Still drowsy you looked to the other side of your bed to find Joshua asleep.

Your breath hitched at the sudden invasion of memories—you had partially forgotten that Joshua had spent the night in your bed with you again.

He was lying on his side, an arm extended to your direction. You had the faint memory of him hugging you close to his frame, so perhaps you fell out of his embrace during the night. 

Joshua's features looked relaxed, peaceful even. His flush lips pursed softly as he swallowed and nuzzled the pillow. The way he looked so cute and innocent made you smile a little. 

With every movement you took, your body protested in pain. But you hurried yourself to the bathroom, taking the time to properly wash and refresh yourself to recover from your hangover.

Under the warm stream of the shower, you mentally retraced the events of the night. The drunken confessions that spilled from your mouth. Joshua's careful hands changing your clothes and helping you to bed.

"How are you feeling?" he asked as soon as he saw you come back to your bedroom, your body wrapped in a bath towel.

He was still lying on his side, but something told you that he woke up the second he heard you leave the bedroom.

"I just have a light headache but I'll be fine," you assured him.

His hand, which was still extended in the same way as when you left, patted the space you occupied during the night.

"Come here," he muttered.

With a sigh that denoted your nervousness, you walked toward your bed and climbed next to him over the covers. You lay on your side, facing him, propping your head on your hand, your elbow on the pillow next to his.

"D'you remember what happened last night? Why I'm here?" he asked, his voice still groggy, but it sounded soft.

"It's not like I was black out drunk," you smiled. "I remember everything, Joshua."

"Jus' wanted to make sure," he whispered.

With a small nod of his head, his eyelids closed slowly and he seemed to dozed off again. His chest rising and falling heavily, his face relaxing to his lips parting a little.

You took a moment to appreciate his beauty before jumping down from your bed, darting your eyes toward the man lying on your bed—to find him asleep.

Then you unwrapped the towel that covered your body. Careful not to make a sound, you busied yourself moisturizing your skin while you cast a few glances at him, making sure he was asleep.

But a few seconds later, you noticed him stir in your bedsheets, his eyelids fluttering slowly as he found you standing before your bed, wholly naked.

Your breath hitched, but curiosity sparked within you when his eyes surveyed your whole body from top to bottom.

Attempting to ignore that he kept his gaze trained on your frame, you busied yourself on looking for something to wear.

"Don't get dressed," he muttered softly when he saw you rummage through your drawers.

You darted a look at him. His sleepy eyes on you, the ghost of a smile on his lips.

"Or do, I don't care. Just come back here," he sighed sluggishly, patting the side of the bed again.

You smiled shyly and climbed back to the spot you had taken a few minutes ago. You slid beneath the bed sheets, next to his warm body.

"You talk in your sleep," he hummed.

Then his hands grabbed you by the hips, with a sharp pull his chest was now pressing on yours, his arms encircling your naked body tightly to snuggle you as if he wanted to sleep again.

It was a sweet embrace, almost too intimate. A part of you couldn't deny you liked it—being this close to Joshua. You grabbed him by the shoulders, uneasy of being fully naked in his tight embrace.

"I–uh I didn't know," you whispered, your heart strumming so hard that you could almost sense that Joshua could feel it against his chest.

Truth be told, Joshua was the first man you had ever slept with. He wasn't your first sexual partner, that much was already disclosed with him—you've had a couple of other partners in the past, but none of them were memorable to even matter.

Joshua was the first to make you feel real pleasure, the first to make you orgasm, to make you feel wanted.

And you were yet to know how dangerous that is.

"What did I say?" you asked reluctantly.

He took a breath, as if remembering and then he let out a breathy laugh. "Bunch of nothings, but you went for hours."

"Oh god," you groaned. "I'm so sorry, Joshua."

"You didn't talk that much the other night," he paused. "But maybe you were too tired the other night to even speak, right princess?"

Your stomach jolted a bit.

"Mmm-mmph. So tired," you agreed despite the growing flush in your face. "Last night's ramble wouldn't have happened if I was tired too."

"Oh, bunny. You think you're so slick. But you're so bratty," he cooed mockingly as his hands explored your bare back, his fingers sinking in the skin of your hips.

"What are you going to do about it?" you asked through a breathy mumble when his hands caused your heart to race.

"Nothing," he stated softly.

A long silence happened between you and Joshua. You almost thought that he might have dozed off yet again, but when you pulled from his embrace, he was grinning menacingly.

"But you promised–"

"I never promised anything," his brow furrowed. "When have you ever heard me say the words 'I promise'? Never."

A frustrated groan came out from you before you could stop it.

"You told me you would do anything I asked today!" you whined, feeling ashamed by his game.

"See, I never promised," he cooed again.

"But you said–"

"And I will do it, sweetheart," he cut in. "But I never specified at what time of the day I'll do it."

"Joshua!" you whined again, feeling the need to cover your flushed face.

He laughed merrily, he was enjoying this.

"I didn't bring condoms," he muttered, dropping the playful smile.

Your eyes narrowed. "You're lying."

"It's true," he put in simply. "Someone went through all of them the other night and I haven't bought more," he emphasized with a cheeky grin, he even shrugged slightly looking as if he enjoyed torturing you.

Which, he probably did.

You were a split second away to throw all away and beg him to fuck you raw. But the last thread of sanity you still preserved in your mind stopped you.

"I forgot to ask," he said suddenly. "Have you made your list?"

You stilled and looked away embarrassed. "Um, I've thought of some things."

"Like what? Maybe we could do something tonight," he replied.

In reality you haven't gotten around making a list of things you want to try in bed with him. Your mind only ends up wandering in sex fantasies of what you'd do and never actually write something down.

"I have some ideas, but I don't know yet," you mumbled sheepishly, darting a shifty glance up his eyes.

The pierced eyebrow arched up. "I'm listening."

A smile appeared on your lips. "You're taking this really seriously," you pointed.

"Of course," he frowned, pretending to be offended. "I want to help my neighbor with her book."

You rolled your eyes with a smile.

"Besides, it's not like I get to do this everyday," he paused. "Well, unless you let me," he muttered, tilting his head forward.

"What?" you asked in a gasp. "Like you don't have people throwing themselves at you at any chance they get."

"Only my pretty neighbors," he chuckled and you playfully slapped his shoulder.

"Seriously, Joshua. You don't get a lot of groupies or whatever?"

He scoffed loudly. "Groupies. What are you, a sixty year old lady in disguise?"

"You know what I mean," you mumbled, starting to feel deeply embarrassed.

"Not really, princess. It's not what you think. I can show you if you want. Tonight," he suggested in a low tone.

The features of his face had hardened, denoting that he was more serious now.

"Tonight?"

"Only if you want to, of course," he shrugged, and you could tell from his tone, the lack of warmth and playfulness that he seemed to be detached.

"I'd love to," you replied and his face relaxed. Was he expecting you to say no?

"Kay," his lips pressed in a smile. "I'll come later to pick you up. And after that we can get into your list, deal?"

"Deal," you smiled shyly, not wanting to express the full excitedness you felt.

You noticed that every time he smiled contently, two dimples appeared crowning his mouth. Joshua sighed and then he cupped your chin with his hand, surveying your face for a moment.

"How's your head, still hurting?" he asked, his other arm still pulling you close to his frame.

"A bit. I'm fine, Joshua. Don't worry," you gave him a small reassuring smile.

"Kay," he whispered and pressed his lips on your forehead just like he did before you fell asleep in his arms.

You felt his lips relax on your forehead but he didn't pull away, his other hand returned to its original place on your waist. You assumed that he was dozing off again, and your suspicions turned correct when his breathing gained more depth.

Then you let yourself be absorbed in his embrace and your hands moved from his shoulders to his hard chest over his t-shirt. You felt the soft thumping of his heart, the slow rhythm of his breathing.

Your eyes darted to his face. He was asleep.

The hem of his shirt hung loose over his collarbones, you felt his soft and warm skin under your fingertips, lost in thought of him. Drinking the sweet scent of his skin and clothes.

Your fingers then wandered from his collarbones to his neck, his Adam's apple bobbed as the pads of your fingers touched it carefully.

But then a larger hand seized yours, pulling your arm above your head as his body pushed your body flat on the bed with a groan. The other hand was seized as well, thus pinning your wrists above your head.

A yelp bubbled in your chest, but when you felt his hard body pressing yours against the bed your curious eyes glanced up to see his face.

But before you could say something, your mouth was clasped with his with a chaste kiss.

"You're handsy," he muttered gruffly on your lips.

The grip on your wrists tightened a bit when Joshua dipped his head on the crook of your neck where he pressed his lips on your skin, to then nibble at your skin with his teeth.

"I wanted to wait 'til tonight but you're so needy. Such an impatient pretty girl," he grunted as his hand grabbed your wrists pressed down on the pillows, making you yelp and squirm.

Being somewhat restrained made you feel restless, but you made no attempt to break free, since you were quickly subdued by the feeling of his breath on the crook of your neck.

"'m sorry," you mumbled just as he started placing wet kisses on your collarbone, making his way to your tits.

"Are you, baby?" he asked, and your eyes fell on his. His pierced eyebrow cocked slightly. "I don't think you're sorry at all."

He let go of your wrists just so he could cup your breasts with his hands and before you could muster a response, he wrapped his mouth on one of your nipples, making you cry out instead.

The feeling of having his hot mouth around your nipple made you shiver, the whole area covered by his tongue and drool felt tingling and ablaze.

Hearing the non-verbal response you made, he moved his mouth to do the same with your other hardened nipple, licking and nibbling at it softly with his teeth. He hummed while doing so, as if he liked the taste of your skin on his mouth.

Your hands quickly grabbed at whatever was nearest, fingers landing on his head as you squirmed and moaned helplessly on your bedsheets. 

He pressed his lips down your sternum and he lowered himself to your belly, his hands parting your legs so he could place his body between them and continue kissing and licking your skin.

"Please-" you whispered as you writhe in pleasure under the touch of his lips.

"Please, what?" he asked as he raised his head to look at you. "What do you want, princess?"

"Do whatever you want, just-" you gulped suddenly. "I need you, Joshua. I've waited all week."

His eyes searched yours, just like he did last night when you were drunk.

"Please," you whispered and that apparently did it for him.

He lowered himself pressing wet kisses on your lower abdomen as his mouth reached between your legs, his eyes darted a look toward yours before his fingers parted your pussy lips carefully, earning a high keen moan from you.

"Fuck. You're dripping," he muttered gruffly as his finger swiped a line on your cunt, making you flinch and moan pathetically. "Practically wetting the bed."

Then his tongue dipped between your parted lips, slowly licking a stripe on your wet folds. You let out a loud moan, grabbing a handful of black hair, making him hum softly when you tugged at it.

Joshua wasn't looking for you to say something, because he quickly continued making out with your clit. You were practically crying out of pleasure when you felt his mouth working on the swollen bud, tugging at it with his lips every time he closed his mouth around it.

You felt your legs shake a bit under the building tension but you didn't budge. A faint voice inside you reminded you to relax, to focus on his mouth kissing your cunt, his tongue swirling around your clit and trailing down to drink you in with a moan.

His hands slid underneath your body and cupped your ass, pushing you up to his face, essentially burying his face between your legs. Joshua's mouth flatly pressed on your cunt as if he were thirsty, ravaging you and humming as he did it.

Then his tongue pressed on your clit, his lips encircling it whole as his cheeks hollowed out, sucking on the throbbing bud. You arched your back, crying out loudly at the feeling of being so close to your release.

"I'm close, so close, Joshua," you whimpered, eliciting a groan from him.

You looked down where his head was nuzzled between your legs and the sight was so fucking good that something in your brain shifted. His dark eyes found yours, and you completely came undone.

The tension in your body snapped, sending waves of pleasure, making your limbs grow numb. You called out his name weakly, your eyes screwing shut at the mercy of the waves seizing your body, making you twitch and gasp in short breaths.

Joshua was moaning just from making you cum. And that could probably send you to the edge again if it wasn't for the new feeling of one of his fingers inside you.

You blinked, feeling dazed and you found Joshua on his knees, his finger plunging in and out of your sopping walls, massaging them gently.

"You liked that, baby?" he asked at the same time he slipped another finger in.

"Yeah," you whimpered. "I've been wanting this for days."

His pierced eyebrow arched up.  "This would have happened sooner if you knocked on my door," he smiled fondly. "But I like that about you—too shy to go knock on my door, but not to ask me to fuck you senseless."

You whined at the same moment his fingers crooked inside you, exploring, looking for your g-spot with the tips of his fingers.

"You like it when I talk to you, right? Your pussy squeezes my fingers whenever I do," he mentioned with a grin.

As if to prove his point, your walls fluttered around his fingers and he chuckled.

"Oh, princess. You're perfect," he muttered gruffly, leaning his body to plant a chaste kiss on your lips.

"God, Joshua," you whimpered, the tension between your legs building up again.

"You wanna cum again, baby?" he asked, grazing your lower lip with his teeth before kissing you chastely.

"Yes. So bad," you groaned, wiggling your hips to get more from his fingers.

"Can you cum on my fingers? Or do you want my mouth too?" he asked, his fingers teasing your cunt, making you feel the drag of his knuckles inside you as he pulled his fingers out and in, making squelching sounds every time he moved his hand inside you.

"Yes, please! I want your mouth too," you whimpered desperately.

His smile was the last thing you saw before he lowered himself between your legs and immediately attached his mouth to your clit. Joshua continued fucking you with his fingers, crooking them to find your g-spot.

"Joshua!" you cried out, your body twitching uncontrollably in your bed. "I'm gonna come, I'm ah-"

Now with his mouth and fingers, the pleasure in your pussy was so much more intense, practically tearing your orgasm out of you as you cried out.

Ragged breaths came out from your mouth, blinking tears weakly as your orgasm sizzled under your skin. Joshua's fingers stopped when he felt your walls relax and slipped out of your sopping core, making you shudder at the emptiness.

Then you were being showered with kisses on your face. You laughed meekly as his lips pressed on yours.

"You're being spoiled, princess," he teased. "Was planning on waiting to make you come until tonight but you're so greedy."

"Mm'm sorry," you muttered weakly.

"Sorry for what?" he asked.

"Dunno," you giggled.

"Are you fucked out already, bunny?" he smiled sweetly at you. "But I haven't even given you my cock yet."

You whimpered and reached for his lips, kissing him sloppily. A moan coiled in your chest when you tasted yourself on his tongue and lips.

Joshua stopped and looked at you with a pleased smile on his face, and a finger caressed your flushed cheek fondly, only to dip his head to kiss you again.

"God. You're so pretty, so fucking hard to resist," he grunted in your lips.

You whined and your hands cupped his face to slot your lips in his. "Please don't," you whispered, your lips grazing with his. "I want more, Joshua. I want you."

His eyes lingered on yours and you could almost see when it clicked in his mind.

"You want me to fuck you raw," he asked with a low tone.

A shiver ran down your spine when you heard his words.

You nodded, biting your lip so Joshua wouldn't notice that you were practically salivating at the thought.

The corner of his lips twitched. "You already came twice."

"But I want you, Joshua. I want to feel you inside me," you whispered, still writhing from your high.

The glint in his darkened eyes made you think that he enjoyed this. Whatever this was: your sanity slipping away at the mercy of Joshua pleasuring you, doing everything you needed from him.

"I can't fuck you raw, bunny," he muttered, pressing his lips sweetly on yours as you whined in his mouth. "It's too dangerous."

You understood that you were clawing at a limit of his, so you backed down. "Okay," you whispered.

"Good girl," he said as his lips captured yours in a heated kiss.

He slumped his body next to you on your bedsheets, resting his head on his hand as the other started caressing your skin affectionately.

"Joshua?" you called. 

"Mm?" he hummed as he appeared to be deep in thought, tracing invisible circles around your belly button.

"Can I-" you sighed when the tip of his pointer finger traced back to one of your nipples.

"Yes?" he asked, smiling when your nipple hardened and then he did the same with your other nipple.

"Can I touch you?" you whispered.

"You don't have to ask," he muttered with a small smile.

The pleased smile that spread on your lips made him chuckle.

You eagerly grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and Joshua understood immediately, sitting up on the bed and took his t-shirt off in one swift motion.

You sat up on your bed sheets—thus realizing that Joshua wasn't exaggerating when he said you were wetting the bed. You ignored the wet stain on your sheets and hooked the waistband of his sweatpants on your fingers.

"Do you want me naked, sweetheart?" he asked, noticing your struggle to undress him.

"Yeah," you breathed, looking at him expectantly.

He climbed down the bed to pull down the sweatpants, he did it efficiently, without making it a show for you but he still looked really attractive while doing so; his strong thighs stepping out of his sweat pants to reveal his hardened length still inside his underwear.

Suddenly you had other plans. You followed him, standing in front of him as he tilted his head to the side. Your fingers tugged at the band of his black underwear, taking it off of him to reveal his fully hard cock.

Then you lowered yourself to your knees.

"I wanna suck you off," you explained shyly, feeling your core pulsate to the mere act of you being on your knees for him.

His fingers grazed your chin. "Have you done this before?" he asked with a low tone.

You shook your head silently, eyeing him and his cock in front of you. Your hands caressed his strong thighs, trailing up to his hips. You realized then that you didn't touch him like this the other night.

One of your hands grabbed his cock at the base, stroking the soft skin of the length to his wet reddened cockhead. It was large and thick, and it leaned to the side a bit. You rubbed your thumb on the slit, feeling his precum leak on the pad of your thumb.

You glanced up at his dark eyes as you took the wet thumb to your mouth, licking his precum.

His breath hitched noticeably.

"I'll tell you what to do," he nodded, then he cupped your cheek, a serious look on his face. "You can stop if you don't like any of it, m'kay?" he muttered.

You wet your lips and nodded. "Okay," you whispered.

"Open your mouth," he instructed gently. You parted your lips and took the bulbous head of his cock and hesitantly placed it in your tongue.

His cock was too big for you to take him deeper, but you experimentally, and almost instinctively, relaxed your tongue under the weight of his heavy cock, wrapping your mouth around the half of the length.

"Breathe through your nose and move your head forward," he muttered and you did so, pushing your mouth on the length of his cock.

"Then back. You don't have to take me all," he instructed, his hands pushing your hair back from your face, caressing your face with his thumbs in the process. 

Whatever he instructed, you carried out without a second thought.

"Good girl," he whispered. 

Hearing him like this only pushed you to focus, despite the throbbing ache between your legs demanding for equal attention.

You discovered then that you liked the act of you taking his cock in your mouth on your knees for him. The walls of your core fluttered and you knew you were getting wetter as you started bobbing your head back and forth just like he instructed.

"That's it, baby. Just glide your pretty mouth on my cock. Fuck, it feels so good, so fucking good," he groaned.

Slurping sounds came from your lips around his thick cock as you picked up your pace. You darted a look up.

When your eyes met, the corner of his mouth curved up. "You look so good with my cock stuffed in your pretty mouth like this," he muttered, his thumb caressing your cheek.

A whimper coiled in your throat that otherwise would have escaped your lips if his cock wasn't stuffed so deep in your mouth. His cockhead was almost gagging you, hitting the back of your mouth every time you tried to push him further.

Drool trailed from the corners of your mouth. You wiped a side with the back of your hand but Joshua quickly stopped you in the middle of it.

"Don't. I like the way it looks," he mumbled, taking your hand to grab at his thigh again.

That made you take mental notes of everything he liked, every reaction you earned you kept in the back of your head. You wanted to pleasure him as best as you could, you made it your goal to earn more pretty sounds and moans.

He shuddered. "Fuuuuck," he groaned faintly again, his voice raspy and guttural.

You glanced up back at him, an idea popping in your head—you liked it when he sucked on your clit, so maybe he would like it if you suck on him too. Your cheeks hollowed, sucking him as you pulled your head back and then pushing your head forward, taking on more of his cock in with each bob of your head.

His head was thrown back, so you couldn't see much of his face. But his throat bobbed when he swallowed and you hollowed out your cheeks for him to moan deliciously. 

"Fuck—shit," he hissed. "If you keep doing that I'll cum in your mouth," he groaned and his hands tightened on your scalp, attempting to pull out.

But you dug your fingers on his thigh, pulling him back as you did it again, bobbing your head faster and hollowing your cheeks harder.

"Is that what you want, baby?" he asked, a large hand cupping the side of your face, thumb tapping you gently to make you look up at him.

You saw the muscles of his jaw twitch when all you did as a response was blink at him twice, nodding your head ever so slightly without detaching your mouth from his throbbing cock.

"Taking my cum the first time you give head—fuck, you're so, so perfect," he sighed weakly.

His fingers clenched on your hair and you knew he was really close because he was breathing out heavily, broken groans. 

"I'll tell you when it happens. Remember to breathe through your nose," he reminded you gently.

You continued moving your head forward, so far that the tip of your nose almost felt his pubic hair, his cockhead bumping the back of your throat, making it hurt a bit. And then sucking on the length moving your head back, breathing in deeply.

Your eyes darted upwards, finding Joshua's face riddled in lust. He groaned, furrowing his brow a bit as his eyelids were fluttering shut and his mouth parted a bit.

"Cumming," he breathed. 

Then he started making the most raw sounds you've heard him utter yet. His moans sounded sweet and raspy, almost as if he were about to start whimpering; all music to your ears. The hand on your hair clenched, hard. Joshua shuddered and with a louder groan his cum was shooting in the back of your mouth.

You moaned with him and stopped moving your head to breathe through your nose, swallowing quickly as ropes of cum filled your throat. It was slightly salty, warm and it was so much of it.

A fiery rush ran down your spine. You enjoyed giving him head and having him cum in your mouth. You loved the reaction he had, the lewd sounds he made, because of you.  

He was breathing heavily—not the way he did when he fucked you into your bed the other night, that was out of exhaustion. This was different, he was heaving, looking like he was elated.

"That was amazing," he sighed heavily once again.

A shudder shook him hard when you sucked on his cock again before pulling it out from your mouth.

"Woah, don't do that," he giggled softly. "Tickles."

You smiled sweetly. "Was it good?"

He bent down to help you up, cupping your face in his large hands to pull you into a heated kiss, you moaned in his mouth as his tongue lapped on yours, probably tasting himself on your tongue.

"The best fucking head I've ever had," he muttered gruffly on your lips.

You laughed.

"I mean it," he nodded, pressing his forehead on yours.

Then Joshua bent down a little and lifted your body up, eliciting a small yelp from you. You quickly grabbed him by the shoulders, wrapping your legs around him.

He gently placed you on your bed and pressed his lips against yours.

"You did really well, baby," he muttered before capturing your lips with his, kissing you softly.

A strange feeling of fulfillment swelled in your chest.

Joshua leaned his head against your chest, seemingly still coming down from his high because when he lifted his head ever so slightly to meet your eyes, he smiled lazily at you.

You returned the smile. Your hand found the nape of his neck and started drawing invisible figures on his bare back. A sigh coming from his lips brushed your skin, making you shiver.

You could get used to this, you said to yourself.

"I have to go now," he muttered, pushing himself from your body. "But I'll come pick you up later, m'kay?"

"What should I wear?" you asked, suddenly feeling nervous at the prospect of going out with him.

"Whatever you want, bunny," he smiled. "You look good in anything... and with nothing at all, too."

A fluttering sensation invaded your chest. You laughed. "Ditto."

He laughed, bringing a hand up to push his dark hair back anxiously. Was he flustered?

He planted a kiss on your lips and stood up from your bed, dressing up quickly. Again, he didn't make a show of it, but you enjoyed watching him nonetheless.

When he noticed your lustful gaze practically eye-fucking him, he smiled. "Insatiable little thing," he muttered, bending down to give you one final chaste kiss. "I'll see you later, sweetheart."

When Joshua came around to knock on your door, it was eight o'clock.

His black hair was parted naturally in the middle and it looked slightly wet. He wore a white faux leather jacket, white t-shirt and black denim jeans and black boots.

"I'm not ready yet," you told him as soon as he crossed your apartment door.

"I can see that," he smiled, looking at you up and down, noticing the silk robe you were wearing.

"Shut up," you quipped.

Rushing back to your room, you quickly got dressed in the outfit you had decided to wear for the occasion, inferring from the style that you usually saw Joshua dressed in for his gigs. 

Facing the mirror, you thought it was a cute outfit, but nothing prepared you for what Joshua's reaction would be.

As soon as you stepped in front of him, his mouth parted slightly, but was quickly replaced by a smile. He took a step to you, grabbing your hand to pull it up and you understood that he wanted you to twirl for him.

"You're gorgeous," he muttered before grabbing your face with one hand to pull you in a hot kiss.

"Thank you," you smiled sheepishly.

"I brought you something," he muttered in between kisses.

"Oh?" you uttered, being showered by his warm lips.

"But you have to open it when we get back. I just wanted to leave it here before we go," he handed a small black box.

It didn't look like a present, it wasn't wrapped or adorned with anything. You wanted to open it as soon as you took it. It was big enough to cover both of the palms of your hands, and it was somewhat heavy for its size, too.

"What is it?" you asked, looking up to his big eyes.

"It's for later," he replied, you noticed a glint in his eyes.

"Oh," you uttered again, smiling. "What's the reason?"

"Consider it one of the many I plan to give you," he smiled playfully.

You cocked an eyebrow. "Should I worry about what's inside?" you joked.

"It's something I know you'll like," he tilted his head to the side. "Or I hope it does."

Your finger slid on the edge of the black box. You got a faint idea of what was kept inside but decided to listen to Joshua and wait for later.

"Let's go, princess. The boys are waiting for us," he said, taking your hand with his.

"Who?" you asked, swiftly putting the gift on the coffee table and grabbing your purse as you headed out of your apartment.

"My bandmates. You'll like them," he assured you, turning to see you. "They've been eager to meet you."

"You told them about me?" you asked in a high pitch tone.

You got in the elevator together and Joshua pressed the button downstairs.

"I told them I'm bringing you with me and they went crazy about it," he sighed, unlocking his phone to show you a myriad of texts from a Jihoon and a Vernon.

You read the oncoming texts, raging for mostly reactions and exacerbated questions about Joshua finally dating someone. But he quickly shut down those speculations from his bandmates at once by saying you were a friend.

Something else on the screen caught your attention.

"You have seven hundred unread messages? And why do they say you're finally dating someone, what do they mean by finally?" you asked, bewilderedly returning his phone in his hand.

"You are a fast reader," he frowned. "I don't like texting," he shrugged.

"And?" you prompted.

His lips quirked into a smile. "Wouldn't you like to know," he joked, then shrugged again. "I've been single for a while."

"Really?" you asked with a smile, cocking an eyebrow.

"You're in no position to tease me about it," he smiled too.

You brushed him off. "Why are you single?"

"I uh..." he frowned and looked to the floor, as if looking for an answer there, "I haven't found the right person, I guess."

A sudden pang of concern jabbed you in the chest. But you made no comment, just nodded.

"And you?"

"Mmph. Same, I guess."

He looked at you. "Are you looking for something in particular?"

You sighed, contemplating your answer. "Nothing specific. Just… someone who feels right, you know? Someone who matches."

He nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah, I get it. Has to be the right match, or it just doesn't work."

"But it's not like I'm actively looking," you added, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yeah, me neither," he replied, trying to match your tone, but the awkwardness lingered.

Feeling the change, he cleared his throat.

The elevator doors opened and you walked outside of the building toward a large van. Where two men were waiting for Joshua, as soon as they saw you walking at his side, they exchanged a not so discreet look.

Joshua scoffed. "These two," he muttered with a grin.

Joshua opened the front door for you and you got into the passenger seat, noticing on your way that the back of the van was packed with a full drum set and two large guitar cases, a mic stand and sound amplifiers.

"This is Vernon and Jihoon," Joshua introduced you to the two grinning men who looked at you expectantly.

You told them your name with a shy smile.

"Behave," Joshua sneered as he sat in the driver's seat next to you, eyeing at the two guys sitting on the seats behind.

"We haven't said anything!" Jihoon protested with a smug grin.

You wanted to laugh at the way that Jihoon and Vernon exchanged looks once again.

"So... where did you two guys meet?" Jihoon asked either you or Joshua.

You felt like the question was directed towards you. "We're neighbors," you put in flatly. But sensing that you were being shy, added: "I complained at him for being noisy."

"Complained?" he interjected. "More like berated me," he teased as he started the car.

"I did not berate you," you bit back with a smile.

He rolled his eyes. "Put your seatbelt on."

"You first," you mumbled, but you did as he told nonetheless.

Jihoon scoffed loudly, trying not to burst out laughing.

"That's cute," Vernon commented flatly.

"What is?" you asked, turning to see the man sitting directly behind you.

He shrugged.

"It's cute that you're acting like an old married couple," Jihoon translated for his fellow bandmate with a smile.

You laughed. "Joshua is just a tease."

You felt him shift and noticed that he gave you a look.

"Oh, Shua's a nightmare," Jihoon retorted.

"Shua?" you repeated, looking at Joshua and then at Jihoon.

"He has many nicknames, you know. Joshuji, Joshu, Joshie, but the girls prefer Shua," he teased.

"Girls?" you parroted.

"Joshua's fans," Vernon informed, looking at his phone aloofly.

"Instagram fans," Jihoon complemented.

"Mmmph," you hummed.

"He's garnered quite the following," Jihoon teased, enjoying how Joshua was practically seething at him through the rear mirror.

"I imagine. But he told me he doesn't," you quipped.

"What?! He doesn't shut up about it with us," he looked over at Vernon, who just nodded with his head.   

"I can find more drummers, you know," Joshua bit back, looking at Jihoon through the rear view mirror.

"Please," the drummer scoffed.

"So you guys have been in a band for long?" you asked, feeling a certain eagerness to know more about Joshua's life.

"Two years?" Jihoon inferred, looking at Vernon, who just nodded in silence.

"I haven't listened to your music yet," you realized out loud. "I'm excited."

Joshua smiled without tearing his eyes from the road.

You arrived at a place called The Spot. Which was a bar located a few minutes from your apartment building.

Joshua parked the large van in the small parking lot behind the bar for the boys to unload the equipment they brought.

"Come. I'll show you inside," he said, grabbing your hand to lead you inside the dark-neon lit interior.

The bar was a western rock bar with an 80s theme. It had old movie posters and red neon signs on the walls. A U-shaped bar top in the center of the space, a large red neon sign that spelled 'Heartbreaker' mounted on the wall. Next to the booths and tables was a small stage where Jihoon and Vernon were already the drum set mounted.

The bar was not that big, but it was already starting to pack with people.

You sat in the last stool at the bartop, the spot was facing the side of the stage.

Keeping your eyes trained on him. He was scanning his surroundings anxiously, as if he was looking for something but nothing in particular at the same time.

"You can order whatever you want. It's on me," he smiled, and nodded at the two guys behind the bartop.

He fixed his jacket and licked his lips, then noticed your gaze on him.

"Are you nervous?" you asked suddenly.

That drew his big eyes to yours. "Nervous?"

"Yeah, you're fidgety," you pointed.

"I'm not," he said sternly, eyeing you with a glint of annoyance.

You narrowed your eyes. "You are," you insisted. "Why? Is it because I'm here?"

You laughed when all Joshua did was roll his eyes.

"I'll deal with you later," he brushed off before turning away and helping the guys get everything installed.

A pretty girl came forward almost a second later with a notepad and wearing a big smile. "Can I get you anything?" she asked.

You thought about it for a second. "Can I get a virgin piña colada?" you asked, feeling like a kid again.

The girl smiled. "Of course, right away."

Seconds later, the tall man behind the counter handed you your virgin cocktail. It had a cherry on the rim and a small pineapple slice.

"Thanks."

The tall nodded. "Are you a friend of Joshua's?" he asked.

You nodded, looking at his name tag. Mingyu.

When Mingyu smiled, you saw that his pointed fangs adorned his smile in a cute manner.

"You are his friend too?" you asked.

"He's more my boss's friend," he nodded in the direction of a tall guy that was talking with Joshua.

"Does he come here often?" you decided to pry.

"Just every other Thursday," he shrugged.

"D'you have live shows every Thursday then?"

"Yep. We try at least," he said as he poured beer on a crystal jug and put it on the bartop. "We are planning on having stand up nights, but Wonwoo says it's not a good idea," he said, pointing at his partner.

Wonwoo looked up, his ears perking at the sound of his name. "What?" he asked, pushing the rim of his frames up his sharp nose.

"Nothing," Mingyu brushed off.

"Have you thought about having Ladies’ Night?" you inquired, seeing the groups of women fill in the booths around the stage. 

"Huh. Sure, why not," he said in a thoughtful tone. And he turned to his partner. "Hey, what do you think of Ladies’ Night instead of stand up nights?"

Wonwoo shrugged, eyeing you curiously. "Either sounds like more work for me," he smiled shyly at the taller man. "Don't tell Cheol I said that."

The groups of girls coming to the bar, you thought, were due to the fact that the bar was partly cheap and well-decorated. It seemed like a fun place for a mini photo session while getting a few drinks; as you noticed from the people posing in front of the red neon signs.

A second thought was that a large part of the mostly female clientele was because the three guys who ran the bar were good looking.

Mingyu was the sweet, friendly looking guy, tall and buff; he was hot and well aware of it. Wonwoo was the alluring, quiet looking guy, dressed in all black, but whenever he smiled, his nose would wrinkle, telling on his sweet side. And the guy who was talking with Joshua also looked really attractive: tall, with the poise of a commander. Pale blond hair and full lips.

Joshua noticed you looking his way and smiled at you, making your insides jolt in response.

It was almost funny. He'd throw just a glance at you and have your body reacting like crazy.

But you guessed that it was unavoidable.

The eyes on him weren't just yours, but half of the people sitting around the small stage looked at Joshua expectantly as he nodded to his blond friend once and took the strap of his electric guitar to put it around his shoulders.

He did a brief sound check, which consisted of strumming the chords a few times aimlessly. That dragged dozens of eyes to the stage.

The microphone was tapped twice by his finger, as the speakers that played regular music died down, the microphone catching the sound around it and you could hear Joshua clearing his throat briefly.

You noticed the energy change around you, the buzz of the crowd growing quiet and then hushed almost completely when Joshua took the microphone, a white pick trapped between his pointer and middle finger.

"Hi, we're Midnight Haze," Joshua said, "and we're going to be your entertainment for tonight. Enjoy," his lips rose into a smile.

Then he turned to the drummer and nodded. Jihoon moved to get into position on the stool he occupied, lifting the drumsticks in his hands. He tapped them together twice, and with a thunderous splash, the music began reverberating throughout the place.

Then the guitar chords pierced the air and their vibrations could be felt on the barstool you were sitting at. With his eyes fixed on his guitar, Joshua raised his head to place his mouth in alignment with the microphone on the stand.

Under the red glowing light, his face lit up almost ominously as he began to sing. The sweet voice reverberated in your chest due to your closeness to the speakers, but beneath that, you felt a surge of emotion invade your senses as his voice rose with passion, weaving the melodies.

Midnight Haze sounded heavy enough like when a tidal wave crashes, but light and fun enough to dance along. Guitar solos spiral into your ears, Joshua appeared to be enjoying himself while swaying with his guitar, igniting a blaze of raw energy.

You realized that you were not the only one who was awestruck. Definitely not groupies. But there were some girls ogling at him, which, you realized, was difficult to resist.

At least from what you could catch, they had their eyes glued to the lead singer, who was putting on quite a show: dancing with his guitar, swaying his head to the music and smiling at his bandmates in some unspoken exchange.

They played for an hour non-stop, ending with an upbeat song and then he thanked the crowd and said goodbye for himself and the rest of the band. As they stepped down from the stage, the audience applauded and so did you, but you couldn't help but feel that you were left wanting more.

After some minutes, the buzz of the crowd resumed as well as the music from the bar speakers. Joshua made his way to you, sweat on his forehead and his looking a mixture of exhilarated and tired. But he was grinning ear to ear.

"See? No one is throwing themselves at me," he told you. 

"Point taken, rockstar," you rolled your eyes. 

He smiled widely, making your heart lurch. "Did you like the show?"

"Yeah. It was way too short, though. I kinda want more," you smiled up at him, still feeling dazed and a bit deafened.

"Sometimes we play on bigger venues and for longer," he commented, nodding to the small stage that was being cleared up from the band's equipment.

"I'll definitely want to see that," you stated.

His big dark eyes found yours, the corner of his mouth lifted. "I'll help the boys and I'll come back for you," he said and booped the tip of your nose before turning to the stage and helping with the dismounting of the equipment.

You quietly observed him as he busied himself to help clean up the stage. He's so cool, you internally said abashedly. He laughed and joked around with Vernon and Jihoon, drawing the attention of the people around them.

He looked at you from across the room and sneaked a wink. Did he know you'd be staring at him? He waved goodbye to his friends and turned to you.

"Ready, princess?" he asked, looking curiously at your already finished drink. "You had piña coladas?"

"Virgin piña coladas," you emphasized, nodding.

"That reminds me of something," he noted, and went to pay the bill to then return to you. "Come on."

Joshua took your hand as he led you back to the parking lot and opened the door of the van for you.

"We have to talk about some rules," he pointed as he drove back home.

"Rules?" you looked at him. Fuck, he's hot even when he's driving.

He had one hand on the steering wheel, and the other was relaxed on the windowsill.

"Last night I told you I wouldn't do anything to you while you're drunk, remember?"

"I'm not drunk now," you interjected.

"But you told me you didn't care, right?"

"And I don't. You can do whatever you want with me," you blurted, feeling your cheeks grow hotter.

"I need to know when something is completely out of the question, princess," he told you softly, eyeing you again.

"Like what?" you asked.

"Can I fuck you while you sleep?" he asked, by the tone he used, you could tell he was just giving you an example.

You smirked. "Sounds like you wouldn't do that," you retorted.

"I'm not into that," he admitted.

"That's why you couldn't last night?" you decided to pry.

"You weren't sober. Under different circumstances, I might've considered it. But last night just didn't feel right," he explained, seemingly deep in thought.

"Noted," you smiled at the careful consideration he had over you.

"I think we need to establish a safeword," he said after some seconds.

You saw him toy with his lower lip as the other hand still gripped the steering wheel.

"And I use this safe word whenever I don't like something, right?"

There was a bit you knew about the use of safewords—you were a bit inexperienced, yes. But not completely out of the loop.

"If you want me to stop, you say it and I will," he nodded, as he parked the van in the parking lot. Swiftly unbuckling his seatbelt, he hopped out of the van and then hurried over to your door.

You were both on the elevator when you told him your safeword after some careful consideration.

"Got it," he nodded again, licking his lower lip in a thoughtful expression. "Any reason why that's your safeword?"

"Wouldn't you like to know," you quipped, a playful smile spreading on your lips.

He chuckled, a mischievous glint in his eye. "You've been really bratty today, princess," he pointed.

"Oh, please," you pushed his shoulder playfully. "It's just a bit of teasing, can't you handle it, Shua? What are you going to do?"

The doors opened with a soft ding.

"Alright," he scoffed, and with a sudden movement, he bent down to throw you over his shoulder as if it was nothing.

"Joshua! Put me down!" you squealed.

You heard him laugh as he walked with you secured over his shoulder and stopped in what you guessed was your apartment.

He entered the combination to your smart-lock and pushed the door open.

"Now princess, where did you put the box I gave you?" he asked as soon as the door closed behind him.

"Coffee table," you mumbled, starting to feel dizzy.

Joshua didn't put you down as he took the box from the coffee table by crouching down slightly to reach it. Your limbs and head dangled helplessly, blood rushed to your head but as he moved to your bedroom, he set your backside on the bed, setting you down finally.

"Open it," he encouraged, and started to take off his jacket.

"I think I know what I'm gonna find here," you muttered, recovering with a sigh.

"Oh, do you?" he looked up at you while you took the lid of the box off.

The box contained two things, one of which confirmed that your suspicions were right—rope. Tightly coiled and bundled, it was black and new, by the smell of it. It was also soft, when you gently reached out a finger to touch it.

Next to the rope, a pair of fuzzy pink handcuffs.

"I got two options for you to choose for tonight," Joshua explained and you found his big eyes scrutinizing you.

Instinctively, you grabbed the rope, since it seemed more alluring to you at that moment.

Joshua smiled knowingly, taking the rope from your hands. "Alright, princess. Rope it is," he nodded.

"But I liked the handcuffs too," you blurted.

"Patience, bunny. We'll have plenty more nights," he stated, making your insides jolt with eagerness.

"M'kay," you mumbled, looking at him anxiously.

In reality, you didn't have 'plenty more nights' as he said, since your deal with him was to be fuck buddies until you finished your manuscript. Which you have been dreading to finish.

He noticed your restive eyes on him and dipped his head to slot his lips in yours, giving you a reassuring kiss.  

"Take off your clothes for me, sweetheart," he instructed gently before pressing his lips with yours.

Your breath hitched so embarrassingly you had to bite down your lower lip. You liked the way he told you what to do, you liked that he took control. So you did what he told you to do.

As your clothes came off, Joshua busied himself preparing the rope for you. But his eyes remained fixed on you as you made a show to take off your clothes for him.

He sat at the foot of the bed—watching you with a sweet smile that didn't fully show his teeth. Your heart fluttered uneasily when his gaze darkened slowly when you got to your see through the mesh red lingerie he asked you to wear.

You unclasped your bra and sheepishly moved it from your chest, throwing it to the floor to then tug at the hem of your thong. 

"Leave that on," he stopped you before you could get to the last piece of your undergarments. 

The rope came undone on his hands, it was longer than you expected. Watching his hand twist the rope in an organized fashion, using his elbow as an anchor while his other hand grasped the other end of the knot.

"You've done this before," you pointed.

"Or," he countered with a grin, "I just know how to tie rope."

You squinted, catching the obvious white lie. "How many times have you done this?" you pressed.

"I don't think you really want to hear the answer to that, princess," he quipped.

Fair.

"Mmph," you hummed.

He sighed and looked at you, almost fully naked under the dim lights of your bedroom. "Yes, sweetheart. I've done this before. Don't worry," he nodded to the bed.

You understood and climbed your bed, moving your body to the middle and lying down on your pillows. Joshua followed you on his knees before you.

He extended the rope out for you, organized in two holes for you to fit your hands inside. You anxiously stuck your hands on each hole, at the same time Joshua slid the knot, tucking it closer to your wrists.

"Is it too tight?" he asked, and you could tell he was excited already.

You shook your head, your eyes trained on Joshua as he bent to finish tying the rope on the rails of the headboard of your princess bed—thus pinning your arms above your head.

"Remember our safeword," he said softly before placing a tender kiss on your lips.

You repeated your safeword, and then you started to feel your body heat in anticipation.

"That's my good girl," he sighed, pressing his lips on yours. "You're good only when you're about to get fucked, right?"

You attempted to give him an answer but his tongue dragged on your lower lip, finding your tongue as he kissed you slowly, enjoying the taste of your lips with a soft hum.

"I'm always good," you replied meekly.

"Oh, sweetheart. If only that were true. You wouldn't be tied right now," he smirked and pulled away from your body.

Joshua jumped from the bed, and started getting rid of his clothes, except his underwear. He smiled when he noticed you looking at him and turned to open the first drawer where he knew now you kept your toys.

Your blood rushed to your cheeks, and involuntarily you moved your hands to no avail—your arms were completely restrained.

"Do you keep them charged, princess?" he asked while he rummaged through your clothes to find your toys on the bottom of the drawer, stored neatly inside a shoe box.

"Yeah," you breathed nervously.

"How often do you use them?" he asked.

"Um... last time I used them was... wh-when I had that dream about you," you stuttered.

"Did you cum, baby?" he asked, looking over to your body as he made his way back to you .

You nodded. "And while I was sleeping," you muttered sheepishly.

He cocked his pierced eyebrow. "Is that even possible?" he asked, climbing back to the bed with two of your toys.

"It was for me," you breathed.

"So you came... twice? From a little wet dream of me eating you out?" he asked, his eyes marveling at the sight of you tied to your bed.

You nodded.

He smiled, letting out a sigh. "My perfect little bunny. Who would've thought you'd be this needy," he leaned in, cupping the side of your face to press his lips on the tip of your nose, then to your lips.

The urge of touching his face too invaded you, your arms twitched, the tight knot of rope stopping you before you could even move any further.

It was almost funny—being aware of the impossibility of touching him but still aching to do so aroused you.

"Joshua... please," you gulped hard.

His laugh came as a surprise to you. "Begging already, princess?"

"I need you," you whimpered, looking at him through your eyelashes.

"But you are in no position to make demands, baby," he muttered and planted a chaste kiss on your lips which you returned eagerly, trying to sneak the tip of your tongue between his lips but he pulled back slightly with a smirk.

"But you said-"

"I know what I said," he interjected. "That was before you acted all bratty today, wasn't it, sweetheart?"

You let out a small whine and bit your lower lip.

"So maybe I won't fuck you tonight, how about that?" he asked, tilting his head to the side, his black bangs obscuring one eye.

"You wouldn't do that," you whined, writhing on your bed, the restraints stopping you before you could do anything at all.

"Careful there, princess. These might be soft but I bet you bruise easily, don't you?" he asked, tugging at the knot pinning your wrists.

"Joshua!" you squeaked.

"Yes?" he met your eyes, giving you an innocent look.

It was insane how controlled he looked, the way he looked at you as if you were his prey and he were just toying with you.

You fumbled for the words, but as his eyes bored into yours, you felt at a loss.

"Joshua, please," you whispered when his lips found your sweet spot between your ear and jawline, making you moan when his lips sucked softly.

"Keep begging all you want, baby," he muttered, and you just knew he was smiling.

His hands trailed down your body, roaming, caressing your breasts and playing with your nipples using his thumbs. You moaned helplessly and grinded your hips against the growing bulge of his dark underwear.

"Desperate little thing," he groaned, lowering his body to attach his mouth to one of your nipples, making you cry out loudly and try to reach for his black hair.

Since your head was propped up in your pillows, you had a fairly good view of him biting and sucking at your nipples, it wasn't hard, but just enough to make you squirm and whimper under him.

"You have the prettiest tits, baby," he muttered as he nibbled softly at one of your nipples. "Can I mark them?"

You nodded as his gaze found yours. "Yeah, p-please do," you urged.

The corner of his lips lifted before pressing his lips on the underside of your tits and sucked softly. You moaned softly, wanting to run your hand through his hair, but not being able to make you feel more uneasy.

"Oh, Joshua," you whimpered as he made a trail of angry red spots on your tits. It was a strange feeling, having his hot mouth sucking on the skin around your areolas.

"I like these," he muttered, toying with the hem of your thong. "I love that you remembered to wear them."

"How could I not?" you quipped, feeling a bit breathless at the sight of him slotting his head between your thighs, kissing your pulsing clit through the meshy fabric of your thong.

"You could be a sweet talker when you want to," he smiled before pressing his tongue flatly on your core, making you cry out.

He sucked gently at your clit for a moment and then pulled his tongue away, hooking his fingers on your thong to slide them down your legs.

You saw him purse his lips directly above your pussy, and spit fell from his mouth, coating your clit. The sight of it alone made you utter a ridiculous sound.

And just when you thought he was going to continue eating you out, he grabbed something he had hidden beside him on the bed, and you realized by the pinkish color on his hand what it was.

"D'you use this often, sweetheart?" he asked as he pressed on the button of your rose vibrator.

He gently parted your pussy lips with his fingers, making you whimper when he placed the sucking tip of the vibrator directly on your clit.

"I... sometimes," you answered as the toy sucked your clit in its mechanical, trained patterns.

"And what about this one, baby?" he asked softly, grabbing with his free hand a wavy glass dildo.

You groaned, feeling both aroused and embarrassed. If you had your hands free, you'd use them to cover your face.

"What's wrong, baby?" he giggled, seeing your reaction. "I saw your collection of toys. I have a rough idea of what you like, but I want you to tell me."

You rolled your eyes, deeply flustered.

"That's my favorite," you pointed with your nose to the clear dildo, adorned with a pink heart at the end. "But if I want to... do things quickly I use this," you pointed to the toy trying to swallow your clit.

"Oh, really?" he smirked and bent forward to plant a sweet kiss on your lips. "I love the idea of you fucking yourself with your toys, princess," he told you before he kissed one of your hot cheeks.

"You do?" you asked in a high pitch tone.

"Yeah," he breathed, and you just loved the way he said it. "My pretty needy bunny, bouncing on a fucking toy. Now, that's something I'd like to see."

You moaned in his lips. But he pulled away too soon, suddenly turning off the vibrator, making you groan at the loss of stimulation. Then he spit on the tip of the dildo, coating it completely with his drool.

Joshua had a grin on his face when you whined loudly at the sudden intrusion of the glass dildo, the bulbous tip pushing your walls open.

"I see why you like this," he muttered as he pushed further into the second wave. "It looks insane, baby. Your pretty pussy is swallowing it in," he whispered.

The dildo was only halfway in, but apparently that's what Joshua wanted because he started rocking it back and forth in your walls, at the same time he clicked the vibrator on again and attached it to your swollen clit, sucking and sending waves through your body.

You moaned and gasped. You had never had both toys on your cunt before, for obvious reasons.

But the vibrator was relentless and the combination of both was making you writhe and cry of pleasure, feeling really close to your release.

"Joshua!" you cried, writhing in your bed so desperately that the headboard of your bed rattled a bit. "Please, please, don't stop." 

"Are you going to come, princess?" he asked and you nodded your head frantically.

He pulled the toys away from your throbbing cunt in a second. You blinked and furrowed your brow at him. 

His lips were clashing on yours before you could utter a word. He moaned softly as he swiped your lower lip with his tongue.

"Remember how bratty you were today, bunny," he muttered gruffly. "I want you to think of it when I allow you to come."

"Joshua, please, just-" you moaned pathetically, trying to push your hips to the dildo still held directly in front of your sopping core.

"What, baby? What do you want?" he asked, his voice low and raspy.

"I want-" you gasped and gulped.

"Do you want me to keep fucking you with your toys? Or do you want my cock?"

The rope around your wrists tightened when you desperately tried to move your arms. "I want you, please Joshua" you whined.

He hummed, seeming to consider it. "Such a greedy girl," he muttered while he kissed you slowly with his wet lips. "Only behaves when she wants my cock."

The vibrator clicked on again under his thumb, attaching it to your clit again and thrusting the glass dildo on your fluttering walls. You contorted in your bed, trying to get the best out of the pleasure from the toys to sate your sopping core, biting down the inside of your cheek to stop the whimpers and sobs.

"I want to hear you," he said and you cried out instantly, feeling so close again to your release.

You screwed your eyes shut, propping your feet on the mattress to try and thrust your hips further on the dildo, trying to fuck yourself faster on it.

You arched your back just as you were about to have your much desired orgasm. But then Joshua set  the vibrator aside and from your clit.

"Please, please, please," you moaned over and over again. "Shua, please, I need you. Please, fuck me."

Then he pulled away from your body, with one swift movement he got rid of his underwear and slotted his body between your legs. He was sliding down a condom and before you could see what was happening properly, he was pushing his cock in your core with a loud groan.

You cried out in both pleasure and pain as he immediately started thrusting his big cock inside you, pushing your walls open for him.

"Fuck, baby. How are you still this fucking tight?" he groaned, his hands grabbing your hips as he pushed himself until he bottomed out and you could feel his full length inside you.

"Shua," you cried weakly.

"Are you alright, sweetheart?" he asked, pushing into your walls slowly.

"'m fine," you whimpered, closing your eyes to savor the pleasure of finally having him inside you as best as you could. "I just- I love having you inside me."

He giggled sweetly. "You do?"

You nodded with your head. "I love it s-much," you mumbled. "It feels so good."

"You feel great too," he said in a strangled voice.

Then Joshua started thrusting faster and harder, making your body bounce on his cock and the headboard slam repeatedly on the wall. You closed your eyes and swallowed hard as Joshua quite practically fucked you into your bed loudly.

You moaned deliriously when you felt the vibrator attached to your clit again, crying out when it started sending pulsations relentlessly, just as Joshua's hips buckled slightly, and his thrusts became more precise and calculated, holding your hips down with one hand.

"F-fuck," you whimpered, your eyes welling up with tears as you could feel yourself weaken under so much pleasure. 

"Too much, baby?" he asked and you picked up on the hint of concern in his voice.

"'m fine, Shua," you replied in a hoarse voice, blinking your tears helplessly. "I'm-m fuck-"

"You're squirting, baby," he told you in a low tone of awe, his eyes trained on your cunt as he plunged his cock inside you, his hand still pressing the vibrator on your clit.

"But I'm not coming," you protested, lifting your head to see but his hand blocked your view.

"I know, sweetheart," he smirked. "Tell me when you're close."

A frustrated groan fell from your lips and threw your head back against the pillows, avoiding answering.

Joshua let out an amused sigh at your small tantrum and you looked at him—he looked mesmerized. His lascivious eyes trained on you, his lower lip trapped behind his teeth, his black bangs stuck against a light layer of sweat that covered his forehead. 

He was on his knees, sitting back on his heels, the muscles of his abdomen tightening with every thrust, your legs draped on his thighs, a hand grabbing your hips, holding you in place while the other kept the toy pressed on your swollen clit.

The sight alone made your walls flutter and clench around him. You wanted to grab him, to feel his skin. The rails to which you were tied to made a rattling noise when you tried to move your arms.

The pressure building inside you from the toy pressing your clit and his cock pushing inside you—you moaned and squirmed on your bed.

"Shua, 'm close, fuckfuckfuck 'm so close," you whimpered, blinking some tears helplessly.

"What did I tell you, princess?" he pushed his cock inside you in a more demanding way, as if trying to rip your orgasm from you.

"I'll be good, Shua, I'm sorry-," you breathed desperately. "Jus' le-let me cum, please?"

"You learn fast," he praised with a lazy smirk. "You can cum, baby," he nodded, his face riddled with lust.

A second later you were writhing, crying out his name, the rope tightening around your wrists as you came hard, back arching and walls spasming erratically around his cock.

"Joshua," you breathed as he rode your high with precise and calculated thrusts.

A faint thought appeared in your mind—you probably looked like a mess, tied to the rails of your bed, hickeys all over your tits, crying and babbling nonsense.

"Fuck, I can't—Shua," you moan an writhed, feeling your core ache and spasm helplessly under the overwhelming stimulation.

"Are you safewording, bunny?" he asked, again, there was that tone of concern.

You shook your head weakly on your pillows. "No—don't stop, I want you, oh Joshua—fuck, fuck!"

You tried to press your ass down on the bed, trying to create some distance from the painful sensation in your oversensitive clit. Joshua appeared to be reading on how your body reacted, and changed the mode of the vibrator to a more delicate one. 

You screwed your eyes shut, feeling like you could sink into a void from all the pleasure your body was feeling, it was almost breaking you. 

You heard a soft sigh. "My pretty bunny. Do you like being fucked silly?" he was smiling from the tone of his voice.

"Love it—love having your cock inside me s'much," you replied almost instantly in a slurry babble.

That made him laugh. "Can you give me another one then, sweetheart? Cum for me again."

You nodded, savoring your fourth orgasm of the day. Your fingers clenched the rope as a form of soothing your body from the waves of pleasure threatening to wash over you. 

"Shua," you whimpered.

"I know, baby," he groaned, blinking slowly as he threw his head back ever so slightly. "I know."

Something snapped inside you, making you close your eyes so tightly you saw colors and then a slew of cries and hoarse moans came out of your mouth until you were breathless and crying from the overwhelming pleasure, the tears running down your temples.

"Fuck, baby," he groaned, and you knew from his face that he was cumming with you. His slightly parted mouth, eyelids fluttering, fingers digging at your hips.

The slamming noises from the headboard against the wall of your bedroom ceased, as Joshua threw the vibrator across the bed, his thrusts lazily coming to a stop with a last strangled moan.

You saw him bend his body forward to untie you in a swift tug of his fingers.

Then his hands were cupping your face, his lips slotting in yours, kissing you fervently.

"You're so good for me, bunny," he muttered in between kisses. "So, so good for me."

Your arms languidly wrapped around his neck as you returned his heated kiss. You moaned at the feeling of having his hot mouth on yours, savoring him.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" he asked after you didn't respond.

"Uh-huh," you replied weakly.

He pressed his chapped lips in a smile that made your heart jolt. Looking at you with a glint of endearment as his fingers gathered some tears that were gathered in the corners of your eyes.

"You sure?" he whispered, his eyebrows knitting together.

You nodded. "'m sure."

"D'you want me to stay?" he asked hesitantly.

"Please?"

He blinked slowly at you, a cute smile stretching his lips. "Of course," he nodded. "Let me take care of you then."

He planted a soft kiss on your forehead and left the bed against your small groan in protest. When he returned a moment later, he had discarded the condom and you could hear the faint noise from the shower running in the bathroom.

"Don't move. I'll carry you," he said as he slid his arms beneath your body, bringing you up to his chest effortlessly.

"Thanks," you mumbled, feeling yourself come back to your senses.

"Don't thank me, baby," he mumbled, glancing at your face with a cautious look.

He set you down on the floor and guided you to stand under the showerhead. The warm water worked its magic, reviving your muscles and senses back to life.

Joshua was looking at you with his curious eyes, as he usually did. But this time, he looked kind of worried.

"Was it too much?" he finally asked as he watched your body soak in the warm water. "You're really quiet."

A reassuring smile crept in your lips. "I'm fine, Joshua. You don't have to worry about me," you replied.

"But I do, let me worry," he said, taking one of your hands to examine your wrists, which were reddened.

Your heart jolted again. "I liked it, Shua. Otherwise I would've told you, right?" you mumbled sheepishly.

His big eyes met yours, and you could see his features relax. His hand released yours to find your nape and pull you into a tender kiss.

"Thank you for trusting me," he muttered, resting his forehead against yours.

It was deafening and alarming—your heart was strumming against your chest, fast; a flutter of nervousness in your tummy. Fuck, this can't be happening, you told yourself. But a part of you knew this was bound to happen.

You were falling in love. 

✮ a/n: first of all: can we pretend that vernon knows how to play the electric bass for the sake of this chapter pls (˘･_･˘)

thank you to everyone who showed love to part i and for the ones who waited for part 2 ty ty ty! i made this chapter extra juicy for those who waited tehe

what do you guys think Midnight Haze sound like? i thought of something like nothing but thieves or sam fender [especially this cover song] but do let me know your opinions! [links re-direct to youtube vids]

you can send an ask, chat with me, or drop your comments don't be shy (◠‿◠)

✮ READ PART 3 !! ✮

click here to join my taglist (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)

✮ warnings: mentions of menstruation, smut with plot, dom Joshua, sub reader, big dick Joshua, phone sex, dirty talks, foul language, corruption kink, praise kink, exhibitionism: bj in a public space, cum swallowing, multiple sex scenes, masturbation, oral sex (f, m), brat taming: orgasm denial and pussy slaps, unprotected sex, creampie, pet names: pretty girl, baby, princess, sweetheart, bunny (hers) baby boy (his)

part iv

In your few years being a full time writer, you've made little traditions to keep for yourself.

For example, each time you started outlining your drafts, you'd go to a special spot in your favorite library, near the windows to watch people walk by on the streets. It helps your brain flow with ideas and brainstorm for hours.

Whenever you need to come up with stronger ideas for a plot, or find yourself in a bit of a writer's block, you go to the rooftop of your building. A tradition which has started to taint under the memories of you and Joshua, because quite inevitably, you start thinking of him.

And whenever you submit a finished draft, you tend to go elsewhere. Literally, you buy a ticket and go somewhere else, distract yourself for a little while, even sometimes, you give yourself the luxury to stay in a hotel for a night or two and come back feeling like a new person.

This time, you only bought a ticket for same day travel. But the method of transportation was by train. Which suited your needs a little bit more: you could see the landscape roll by your eyes, the openness of the outskirts of your city was beautiful—so different from looking out the window and seeing big tall buildings and billboards.

You've only visited this city once, when you published your first book years ago. As a young writer, you didn't have much money to go anywhere but there.

But you came across a gem: the town was colorful, it had its own quiet magic of a place loved and celebrated by the people who lived there.

When you first visited, you felt alien to the silent movement of the day. It was so strange to you that at first you got an eerie chill that maybe you got to a ghost town by accident, being so used to the buzz of the city throughout the day.

That's why you chose to come here as soon as you submitted your finished draft. It felt like sending a love letter and then hiding under your bed covers.

There was a small creek in the middle of the beautiful town, and a wooden bridge stood above it. You sat on a bench near the creek, the only noise filling your brain was the current of the stream.

Until the buzz of your phone interrupted that peace.

[9: 14 AM] Yen ✿: good news! [9: 14 AM] Yen ✿: you've been green lighted the second installment to your trilogy   [9: 14 AM] Yen ✿: yay! 🥰 [9: 15 AM] you: What? they already finished reading it? I sent it at midnight ???  [9: 15 AM] Yen ✿: of course you're up already  [9: 15 AM] Yen ✿: they haven't read it yet, that much i can tell you but  [9: 15 AM] Yen ✿: idk what to say girl [9: 15 AM] Yen ✿: they already want to know you're working on book 2

That doesn't make sense, you said to yourself.

[9: 16 AM] Yen ✿: why do i feel like this is bad news  [9: 16 AM] Yen ✿: are u not excited or  [9: 16 AM] you: I am! this is great!  [9: 16 AM] you: I'm already working on book 2 :) [9: 16 AM] Yen ✿: great i'll tell them  [9: 16 AM] Yen ✿: btw what happened to mr hot neighbor  [9: 17 AM] Yen ✿: 👀👀  [9: 17 AM] you: Can we have that conversation on another day? I don't want to think about him right now [9: 17 AM] Yen ✿: fine

But it was entirely too late.

Memories of the last night you spent with Joshua started to flood your mind. You saw him last that Saturday night when you asked him to continue with your little agreement of being fuckbuddies.

He agreed. So you agreed to not see each other on Sunday, but what did happen was that he finally asked for your number. Though as expected, he hadn't texted yet.

That was another reason for your departure today. As soon as the clock hit midnight and it was Monday, you sent your file with the finished draft of your book and booked a ticket for the magical town you remember having visited in your first publishing experience.

Will he text? He hadn't all Sunday, so you didn't see it foreseeable that he would on Monday. Well, what do you actually know about him? You knew a few things. You seemed to have measured his behavior really well but what else did you know?

Nothing.

Not his birthday, his favorite color, his favorite song or movie. Does it matter? He's your fuckbuddy. There are no rules as to what you should know about the person you're fucking.

There may be a few details that are pertinent to doing what fuckbuddies do, yes. Like protection and being tested and such, a thing that you already had covered with Joshua, obviously.

But, should you know your fuckbuddy's favorite color? You knew that he didn't like to kiss you while fucking you, for example. And he conveniently fucks you in positions that distance your hands from his face so you can't touch him either.

Why does that feel like a bitter pill to swallow? Ah, yes. You have a terrible infatuation over him. Like a thorn that you do not dare to remove. In fact, you like the pain you get from it because it's the only thing you'll get.

You let out a broken sigh, swallowing your tears. You felt particularly emotional that day—a sign of your upcoming cycle, so your hormones were working twice as hard.

Another reason to stay away from Mr. Hot Neighbour, if you will.

Despite the sunny day, the temperature was growing colder, so that the season was changing to winter. You liked the mixed taste of it, the sunny sky and chill in the air, sitting by the peaceful creak of the ghost town.

You had a pending decision looming in your mind from the moment you took the train in the break of daylight. Should you tell Joshua how you feel? Is it something you thought helped your situation?

There was nothing you could compare your situation to your past experiences. Your past lovers never got to be as relevant as Joshua. No lover ever shook your heart so hard to the point of hurting. It wasn't just the sex, or his crushing beauty—you were well aware of that. 

You just fell in love of the way your bodies synced together. The way that he seemed to hear your thoughts and read the way your body moved so well. He made you feel seen.

Maybe it's not a great idea to confess to him. But you could try another way, maybe taunt him with silly questions about love, like you did before. 

After what seemed like an hour had passed, you opened the small portable cooler you brought with your person. You came prepared with a meal to have in the quietness of the creak, hearing the sounds of nature and the quiet life of the little town around you.

It was a peaceful day, the only thing that disrupted it was your pending talk with Joshua, which still resided in your head, wasn't even a fact yet.

You planned to stay until sunset, which due to the fact that winter was onset, happened early. You chose to read a book on the two hour trip back home, which was a good choice since it had been a while since you read something other than your own work.

In the elevator of your building, you found yourself wishing for a night of peaceful uninterrupted sleep. You didn't want to suffer from insomnia for a good while, although you knew that with your second book green lit, that might be happening soon.

You stifled a yawn as you got to your apartment. It was 7 PM and you decided that it might be a good idea to prepare yourself for bed. You drew yourself a bath, had a small meal and went overboard and induced yourself to sleep with melatonin—for good measure.

The good thing was that it was a dreamless, heavy sleep.

You woke up the next day feeling incredibly groggy and much to your demise, felt the silent announcement of the beginning of your cycle. With a groan, you dragged yourself out of bed and kick started your day.

[11:55 AM] joshua: bunny, are you busy today?

You stared at your screen for a good while. You were in the middle of your daily chores, cleaning your mail and responding to some others when your phone buzzed on your desk.

You turned the silent mode on and decided to respond to it later.

Why does he have to call you that? Does it hurt him to call you by your name?

Easy, you told yourself.

[18:31 PM] joshua: i'll take that as a yes ? [18:34 PM] you: I'm free tonight

You bit your lip. God, why do you feel like a teenager that time you first talked to the person you had a crush on?

[18:34 PM] you: But we can't do anything [18:34 PM] joshua: what do you mean ? [18:37 PM] joshua: are you in?

Your stomach dropped.

[18:37 PM] you: Are you outside my door right now?  [18:37 PM] joshua: where else? [18:37 PM] joshua: open up [18:37 PM] you: Let yourself in

You removed your cancellation headphones from your head and attempted to smooth your hair to appear at least decent and not like the little study mouse you were the whole day.

"Bunny? Where are you?" you heard his sweet voice call from the living room.

"In the study," you replied just as Joshua pushed the door open, sneaking his head in first.

"Hi there," he smiled at you sweetly, looking around like a child in a toy shop. "Wow, this room is so... you."

You laughed. "Is that so?"

"I like it," he nodded, looking at the shelves upon shelves stacked with books and clutter, collection toys and figures from your favorite media. Fairy lights on the walls, a couch on the side that hosted your small army of squishmallows that moved the first night that Joshua slept in.

"Thank you," you replied with an excited smile.

"So? What do you mean we can't do 'anything'?," he did bunny ears over the word.

"I'm... going through stuff," you said, making a circle motion with your palm toward your lower belly.

"Oh," he blinked, then cocked his head to one side. "And?"

It was your turn to blink in bewilderment. "What do you mean 'and'? Is it not super gross for men to even hear the word menstruation?"

"Maybe, for some. I don't know. I don't care," he shrugged with ease. "You've never had period sex, I take it?"

"Joshua! No!" you chastised, your stomach fluttering uneasily when he laughed.

His nose wrinkled as he giggled. "Sorry, but you can't expect me to be grossed out by a little blood. I've done it before, if it makes you feel better."

"It does not," you replied with sincerity, crossing your arms and standing from your armchair.

He was wearing what he usually wore when he was home. Sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt. His hair was unlike the last time you saw him, it hung loose and you just loved it, it made you want to run your fingers through his dark locks.

"Well, if you don't want to have sex tonight, maybe we can chill instead, if you want," he shrugged as he took some aimless steps in your office room.

Your stomach tightened. "What do you mean?"

"We could watch a movie," his hand brushed his hair distractedly.

"I-I was actually about to go out," you blurted.

"Oh, you were?" his eyes scanned you briefly.

"To the drugstore. I'm... running out of supplies," you muttered, feeling your blood run to your cheeks.

He smirked. "Bunny, you don't have to be shy with me. Come on, I'll come with."

"O-okay," you muttered. "Let me get a bag."

It felt weird to walk down to the drugstore with Joshua strolling by your side. Doing simple ordinary things with him was something new to you, since you only saw him in your bedroom, and occasionally on the rooftop of the building you both live in.

When you found yourself wishing he would take your hand, you dug both your hands on the large pocket of your hoodie.

"How did it go? Your book thing," he asked, breaking the ice.

You smiled at his choice of words. "It went well. They want me working on the second book already."

"Oh, that sounds good," he gave you a gentle smile. "But they don't give you like, time to rest or something like that?"

"Well, I screwed up a bit because I was a little ahead of deadline and told them the second book was in the works, so there's no time to rest," you shrugged.

"I get it," he nodded. "I don't get days off either. It's either recording vocals, writing music, networking or something else."

"Did you have to work yesterday too?" you asked with genuine curiosity.

"I went back to the studio because Jihoon wanted me to re-record some lines. We went on a rabbit hole after that 'cause he's nervous about possibly working with major producers. We're self-produced for now," he smiled and rolled his eyes at the memory.

"Was it good though, at the end?"

"Oh, yeah. The perfectionist he is, he didn't stop until he okayed it," he nodded and opened the door of the drugstore for you and you muttered a word of thanks. "And the day before... Sunday. Yeah, I normally go out with my mom—or try to."

"Oh?" you pushed your eyebrows up. "What did you do this time?"

"We had lunch and then visited a botanical garden. Drove her home after that," he told you with an absent smile, probably remembering his day with his mom.

Your heart swelled with fondness. "That sounds really nice, Joshua," you replied, trying not to show the emotion you felt.

"Yeah," he seemed to snap himself from his train of thought, looking up to the aisles. "I don't know where I'm going, I'm following you."

You laughed. "Don't worry, you won't get lost baby boy," you said with an air of confidence as you turned to the aisle where you'd find what you needed.

"Did you just call me baby boy?" he giggled goofily.

You ignored him, throwing in the basket your supplies.

"You told me you needed supplies, bunny. What's this?" he said, looking up to the shelves. "Snacks?"

"These are my supplies," you said with a whine. "Don't judge me."

"I'm not judging," he lifted his palms to your view. "Whatever you need."

"I actually do need to collect something from the counter," you said, fishing your prescription from your pocket but not showing it to him.

"Oh, are you sick?" he inquired as he followed you out of the snacks section and toward the counter.

You kindly handed your prescription to the lady and she handed back birth control pills. Then when it was time to pay, you tried to hide your blushing face to Joshua, who could probably notice your natural shyness kicking in, no matter if he stood behind your back.

"Are you on the pill? Why did you never tell me?" he muttered beside you as you both walked out of the drugstore with your bag full of supplies.

"Not yet," you frowned, though your face felt hot. "In theory and according to this, I begin today," you told him, keeping your eyes glued to the sidewalk.

"I see," he replied, seemingly thoughtful. But then, he asked: "So we're watching movies tonight?"

"Yeah, that'd be nice," you admitted. "It's been ages since I watched a movie at home—or at the cinema, for that matter."

"Cinema," he smiled. "Sometimes I forget that you're an old lady."

"Shut up, Joshua," you scoffed but couldn't help the growing smile on your face.

The only way you could describe your apartment was something akin to a fortress: never short of food or supplies, you had everything you ever needed for entertainment, you worked there most of the time. You were lucky to have made it your little fortress—and well, also you worked hard to keep it that way.

When you got back home with Joshua, you freshened up in the bathroom and changed into comfier clothes and brought a blanket to the living room, where you had a decent tv screen.

"What do you prefer for tonight, princess?" Joshua asked as you returned to the living room wearing your comfiest attire.

"Aren't you choosing tonight?" you asked as you sat beside him on your couch and threw the blanket over your legs.

"What, you're not sharing?" he asked, looking at your fluffy blanket.

"I can bring another blanket for you," you blurted, feeling deeply embarrassed.

"What if I only want to share yours?" he pouted cutely, he even made puppy eyes.

Don't torture me like that, your inner voice pleaded to him. 

"I- we can share," you smiled abashedly. "Sorry, I just didn't think-"

"I'm just playing with you, bunny," he laughed merrily.

You stopped cold. "I- what do I do?" you blurted. "Do you want to share or not?"

"Oh, you sweet thing. Alright, let's share," he exhaled. "We're watching horror, then."

"O-okay," you muttered, feeling deeply flustered at the whole exchange.

The blanket covered you and Joshua perfectly. It was large enough to cover your whole bed. So you confidently propped your feet bundled up in fluffy socks on your coffee table without the blanket falling off or uncovering Joshua.

"You can do the same," you suggested to him after he saw you put your feet up on the surface of your otherwise neat coffee table.

"You're weird," he muttered, but followed you nonetheless, extending his large legs on the coffee table with yours.

"Why?" you frowned.

"You don't seem like the person who would tolerate feet on a table," he laughed. "But you always prove me wrong in something."

You felt your cheeks grow hotter. "What- why? Why does that make me weird? I just wanted to stretch my legs."

"I'm not saying it's a bad thing," he shrugged. "I mean, your apartment is always super clean and you're a bit haughty about certain things so I just thought-"

"I am not haughty!" you gasped.

"Ah, there we go again," he let out his high pitch giggle.

"Shut up, Joshua. You're not perfect either," you muttered with a pout.

"I know, sweetheart," he laughed harder.

"You-you're cocky," you blurted. "You're... you're..."

Joshua arched his eyebrows, waiting for your best worst descriptor.

But you just sighed: "God, you might be perfect."

He laughed harder. "Are you sure you're not ill? Let's take you to the doctor," he joked.

You scoffed. "Ugh, I'll take it back. You're the worst."

"I'm anything but perfect, baby. Far from it, actually. But I appreciate your lukewarm compliment," he said, sliding a hand under the blanket and finding your thigh, to which he gave a gentle squeeze.

With a jolt, you rose from the couch, visibly startling him. "I almost forgot my snacks! D-do you want something to drink?"

You hid yourself in your kitchen and heard his distant reply. "I'll have whatever you're having."

A silent sigh escaped you. You needed to find some kind of rein to your emotions when Joshua was around you.

"Does hot tea and milk sound okay?" you asked.

"Sounds great. Thanks," you heard.

You returned with a tray with two mugs and a plate full of your favorite sweet snacks. Joshua frowned slightly then you set the tray between you and him, setting a clear barrier between you two.

If he noticed you were creating some distance, he didn't say anything. And you silently thanked him for it.

Joshua chose a horror movie. If he did it because he enjoyed horror, he didn't look the part, not one bit. His face wore a frown in disgust throughout the whole thing—and it wasn't only because of gory depictions.

The film was deeply disturbing, to anyone in their right mind, it would seem. But you occasionally giggled at certain moments when Joshua flinched or even jumped on the couch. You never bat an eye, you even found the story a bit flimsy, reliant in shock value and with very evident plot holes.

"That was... something," you muttered as the credits rolled on the screen.

"You are scary," he told you, still looking deeply startled.

You let out a laugh. "Why?"

"You laughed when the lady found out that her daughter was dead!" he pointed with an obvious tone.

"What, it was funny," you shrugged. "I dunno, the face she made was funny. Thought it was a weird cry face."

His mouth parted, frown deepening. "That's psycho talk," he shook his head.

"Chill, it's just a movie," you huffed.

"You pick next time," he rolled his eyes. "But let's not watch horror in a while. I've had my fill."

You laughed. "You want me to hold you?" you teased.

"Yeah, that would be nice. Please and thank you," he mumbled in a low tone.

You realized he seemed serious for a moment. "Wait, you're not joking?"

"Yeah, I am," he laughed. "Unless you want to, though," he nodded at you with a cheeky smile that could only mean that he was now teasing you.

"I'm fine, thanks," you shook your head. "I don't find cultish things scary."

"What do you find scary, then?" he inquired, he leaned his head back on the sofa and turned to see you.

You were eating on your snacks. You were not hungry, just felt the need to keep your hands and mouth busy.

"I... don't know," you replied after a long minute.

"Interesting," he muttered.

"What is?"

"You are," he frowned slightly.

"Were you expecting me to curl up in a ball and ask you to hold me?" you taunted.

"Kind of? Yeah," he said, his eyebrows arched a bit.

"Well, maybe we can keep searching for the one horror movie that makes me want to do that," you suggested with a playful smile on your face.

He narrowed his eyes. "Oh, you might be a bit crazy," he joked. "Lucky for you, I'm a bit crazy too."

"Oh, yeah? And why does that make me the lucky one?"

"Because I might say yes," he muttered with a smirk.

"Deal it is, then," you lifted your chin almost proudly and tended your hand to him.

He shook it contentedly. "Deal. But not tonight, though. Maybe in a month—or two."

Your chest tightened at the sound of that. Time with him, making plans, made your heart flutter in your chest.

"Sure, whenever you're ready, baby boy," you replied with a grin.

He closed his eyes slowly. "God, why did I do to deserve this," he muttered with a downturned smile.

You rolled your eyes, then threw the blanket off your legs. "Bathroom break," you announced for the nth time, since during the movie you had a few. "I'll be back."

When you finally returned, Joshua was fast asleep on your couch, breathing deeply with his arms crossed on his chest.

The sight of it was warm, almost too cute to even process. You felt the urge to grab his cheeks and pinch them or squeeze the air out of his lungs.

Maybe you are crazy.

You picked up the tray from the couch, the barrier that kept his hands away from you and placed it on the kitchen counter, deciding to clean up the following morning.

Deciding on what to do with the large man asleep on your couch, you sat quietly beside him. Twiddling with your fingers. Should you wake him and tell him to go home? Should you suggest that he stay the night? He lived right next door, he could just walk to his bed in less than a minute.

But you wanted him to stay with you.

Then suddenly, he jerked awake with a loud grunt, throwing his hands at you like big claws. "Bwaaah!"

You let out a screech in sheer terror at having him give you the scare of your life. "Goddamnit, Joshua!" you slapped him on his shoulder repeatedly.

He laughed himself silly. "Got you," he muttered with teary eyes, not even trying to dodge or cover himself from your attacks.

"Yeah, yeah," you stuck out your tongue at him, making him laugh harder again.

"You're too cute," he said, wiping a tear from his eye.

"Screw you," you pouted.

He rolled his eyes. "Oof, don't go around saying that. You potty mouth," he teased with a grin still plastered on his stupidly beautiful face.

You scoffed, but fell short of witty replies to give him.

"How are you feeling?" he asked softly.

It took you two seconds to understand what he was referring to.

"Oh, I'm okay. Well, not okay but I just don't feel like dying yet," you muttered with an offhanded air.

He pouted cutely. "I'm going to pretend I know what that means."

Joshua was a few inches away from you, just at hand's reach, but you didn't dare touch him. Even if you were dying to.

You laughed. "I'm fine, Joshua. I can deal with the pain just fine."

"Oh, okay," he shrugged slightly. "I was about to offer a back rub, but given that you're okay..."

"I'd like that," you nodded, feeling your cheeks grow hotter. "I'd like that very much, please."

Joshua grinned. "Lie down, princess," he instructed, patting on his thigh once to indicate the place where he wanted you to lie your head.

You did so, lying on your tummy, head resting on his thigh and stretching your legs on the sofa. His large hands started massaging softly on your lower back, over your comfy clothes.

"Oh, oh? That feels good," you exclaimed, feeling bewildered. "You're really good at this."

"Why do you sound surprised?" he asked and you darted a look at his face, he flashed you a grin as he caught your eye.

"I-I'm not—well a little," you muttered as his hand pressed softly on your lower back alleviating the stress from the cramping you've had all day.

You scrunched up your face when he got to a region that activated your nerves, it didn't exactly hurt, but it made you clench your muscles in response.

"Does that hurt, bunny?" he muttered.

"It feels weird," you replied. "Keep going."

You heard a soft chuckle. "Do you like this?"

He used both hands to rub your lower back, fingers digging at the sides of your hips, applying just the right amount of pressure to your skin to make you groan in satisfaction.

"Yeah. Feels so good," you muttered, closing your eyes.

You could feel yourself letting loose, so much that you weren't aware when you fell asleep on his lap. What woke you up with a start was feeling your drool dripping from your parted lips and onto his lap.

The back rubs had stopped, in fact everything had stilled and when you darted a look up, you found Joshua asleep, still in the same sitting position he was when he was giving you back rubs.

It was 2 AM, you suspected that you had fallen asleep around 11 PM. So Joshua didn't dare move under the risk of waking you up.

He slowly stirred after noticing that you had moved from his lap.

"Hi there," he whispered groggily with the ghost of a smile.

"Let's go to bed," you muttered, not caring that you could simply tell him to go home.

You got up from your couch and dragged him along, silently thanking him for not protesting against your wishes.

He took off his large t-shirt as you threw the bed covers and climbed your bed before he did.

"What?" you asked when you saw him standing by the foot of the bed, his bare torso exposed to your view.

"Do you have an issue if I sleep in my briefs only?" he asked, genuinely curious.

You laughed. "Please. We've slept naked before," you muttered, but he didn't budge. "Yeah, 'm okay with it."

He took his sweatpants off and climbed to your bed, lying next to you.

You instinctively scooted closer to him and he smiled, sliding an arm under your body to drag your body so that now his chest was pressed to your back, his arms circling you so he was practically hugging you from behind.

"Are you feeling better?" he muttered, his nose slightly bumping the back of your ear.

"Yeah. Thank you Shua," you replied, snuggling in his embrace.

"Here to help," he whispered before pressing his lips on your hair.

The rest of the week went smoothly.

Joshua had taken a liking to texting you when you least expected him to. Sometimes, he'd ask random questions, just to taunt you and make you blush. As if he knew the effect he had on you even without interacting with him in person.

[18:23 PM] joshua: are you free tonight princess? [18:23 PM] joshua: wait don't tell me [18:23 PM] joshua: you're working

You had been keeping him at bay all week by telling him you have to outline book two of your trilogy. Which was true, you unburied some old drafts, but decided that given the fact that book one underwent a lot of changes, book two would have to adopt those changes too.

But the reason why you made yourself busy was to keep yourself away from him. You were too nervous to face him again after that Tuesday night—in which you purely hung out together, no sex.

You let out a sigh.

[18:24 PM] you: I'm free tonight  [18:24 PM] you: Why?

It was now Saturday. You hadn't expected to see Joshua that night, since he usually had something planned during the weekend.

That being said, you totally weren't expecting a call from him.

"Yes?"

"God, you might be an old lady. Who answers the phone by saying 'yes'?" you heard him laugh.

"I'm hanging up," you cooed, trying to hide your smile.

God, how can he get you this flustered already?

"Wait, wait," you heard a giggle. "What are you wearing right now?"

"Really? Really, Joshua?" you gasped.

"No, wait I mean—don't hang up. I'm picking you up in an hour. We're going out," he told you, and you could tell that he was walking hurriedly, his breath hitching up as the buzz from the street filtered through the phone.

Your stomach dropped. "What, where? Jesus, give me some warning next time," you stood up from your desk and went to your bedroom.

"I am giving you a warning, right now. We have a gig tonight and it's a big thing for me. I want you to be there," he spoke in a lower tone, as if not wanting anyone else to hear.

"Well, I'm in my pyjamas. Hope that's fine with you," you joked. You were in fact not wearing pyjamas, but comfy clothes.

"The bunny pjs?" he inquired in a lower tone, but you could tell that he was smiling. "Oh no, sweetheart. I love to see you in that but I'm afraid that's not going to do."

"Well that's what you're getting," you smiled despite the blood rushing to your cheeks.

"Come on, baby. Wear something nice for me?" he purred into your ear. 

You sighed in pure delight and felt lucky that he wasn't there to see that you were aroused already.

"What do you want me to wear?" you almost mewled, not caring about how lewd you sounded.

"Whatever you want, princess. You look good in anything," he muttered.

"I'll wear something cute," you responded, your voice high and almost sweet for him. "And I'll wear something underneath for you only, if you want."

"Fuck, I'm getting hard already," you heard him sigh.

Your eyes widened. "Really?" your voice rose an octave higher. "Why?" you asked innocently.

"Just thinking about you gets me hard," he groaned, but you could tell he was smiling by the sound of his voice.

"Joshua! You're in public! Don't say those things aloud," you chastised him, but couldn't ignore that hearing that made you instantly wet and your core flutter in excitement at his words.

"I just got to my car, princess. Calm down," he laughed faintly. "No one can hear me here. Or see."

"Well, in that case, I'm really, really wet for you right now," you muttered with a sigh as you sat on your bed and slowly lied down.

"Fuck, baby. I love hearing you say that," he purred in a raw tone.

"Yeah? What else do you love hearing me say?" you dared ask.

Maybe your newfound confidence was due to the fact that he wasn't present in your bedroom right now. Your heart was thumping hard against your chest, and your face felt hot at the daring words that were escaping your mouth.

But you didn't care, all your focus was on the voice in your ear.

"I love the way you say my name," he confessed almost sheepishly, as if he was almost admitting that to himself.

"Shua?" you asked, playing dumb. 

"No, no. That's not my name, baby," he muttered in a tone of false reprimand.

"Joshua," you smiled.

"Mmm yeah. I love hearing you say my name. Love it when that's all you can say while I fuck you silly," he admitted, his voice dangerously low.

"Mmm, yeah?" you echoed as your free hand sneaked beneath the band of your sweatpants, burying itself beneath your soaked panties.

You let out a mewling sound when your fingers found your already pooling core.

"Are you touching yourself, princess?" he asked after he heard you sigh in pleasure.

"Yeah," you admitted. Your wet fingertips had already started rubbing circles around your swelling clit. "Wanna come and see for yourself?"

"Fuuuck," you heard him sigh heavily. "I'm a bit far away right now. But I'd love to be there, princess."

"Can y-you talk to me?" you asked with a tiny voice then bit your lip to avoid moaning louder, feeling your legs starting to tense up.

"Are you touching yourself with your fingers?" he asked and you said yes. "God. I'd love to see that one day."

"Yeah? Why?" you asked with a frown.

"I think it's really fucking hot. I want to see you play with your toys until you're spent," he sighed and you imagined him smiling. "I want to hear you say my name while you do it, too."

"You think that I think of you when I touch myself?" you dared ask again as your fingers gently swirled around your sensitive bud.

"You don't?" he bit back.

"Yeah, I do," you admitted despite yourself. "How did you know?"

"Just a small hunch," he sighed, is he smiling?

"I always think of you when I come. I imagine it's you that's making me come," you blurted.

"I'm right next door," he groaned. "You know you can just tell me and I'll be there."

"But what if it's super late?" you pried.

"I don't care,"  he confessed with a low groan.

"Are you touching yourself too?" you asked with a high pitch whine.

"I can't. Not unless I want to be charged for public indecency," he muttered and you could tell he was smiling.

"Are y-you hard?" you asked as your fingers pinched your swollen and slick covered clit.

"Yeah, baby. I am," he sighed. "You've been ignoring me a little this week," he laughed.

Your heart clenched and a moan escaped your lips as your fingers toyed with your clit. "Y-you're not seeing other people, then?"

"You're asking me right now if I'm fucking other girls?" he muttered with a groan that didn't denote his arousal anymore. "Why would I want to do that?"

"I dunno, I figured-"

"You're the only one I'm fucking. I haven't been with anyone else since you," he muttered reproachfully. "We've talked about this before—does this get you off, baby? Do you like to hear that you're the only girl I want?"

"Yeah," you admitted, shutting your eyes close as your body responded with a wave of heat at the sound of his words, you groaned and twitched in your bed a little.

"Is my pretty girl possessive? Is that it?" he muttered again, and in your inner eye you saw him grinning like an idiot.

"Yes, I am," you gasped as your fingers pressed on your clit and massaged it in the only way you knew would get you closer to your sweet release.

"Oh, you greedy, greedy little thing," he tutted. "Are you close, baby? By the way you're breathing I can only assume that-"

"Yes, 'm close, Joshua," you whimpered, your fingers working faster on your clit.

"I wish I could see that right now," he replied. "You don't know how much I've needed you this week."

"Fuck," your legs twitched and a moan coiled in your throat.

"I'd have you every day of the week if you let me, baby," he let out a stressed sigh. "Don't think I would rather have someone else before you."

"Joshua-," you muttered in a broken moan, trying to bite your lip as you came on your fingers, gasping and whining as the wave of pure bliss washed over you, making your jaw go slack and let out his name in low whimpers.

"I know, baby," he muttered as he heard your moans: "I know."

Your body went limp after a long minute and you slowly came back to your senses.

"God, that was embarrassing," you sighed to yourself, moving your hand out of your pants.

He giggled. "Why?"

"I—never mind," you rolled your eyes. "See you in a bit?"

"See you in a bit, bunny," was the last thing he said before you hung up.

The cold shower you had afterwards served two purposes: a cold slap back to reality and a reflection on your crazy toxic behavior.

Joshua was not your boyfriend. So what if he were fucking other people? Even if he were, you didn't have a say in it. You were just fuckbuddies.

You decided to wear something you thought never would, something you bought on a whim. A little black dress that hugged your body in a flattering way and accentuated your beautiful body, it showed some cleavage, but you felt confident enough to wear it now.

You waited in your living room for Joshua, tapping your fingers impatiently and checking your phone every now and then until you heard him knock, and you ran to get your door.

Joshua pushed through the door, grabbing you instantly by the waist and pushing you to the nearest surface where he could sit you down. The table felt cold against your ass when he set you down harshly, making the skirt of your dress fly up as he slotted himself between your legs.

"I'd take you right here on this table if we didn't have to be somewhere else right now," he said in a low tone, grabbing your chin with his fingers.

"Please do," you urged as his lips locked on yours chastely. "Fuck me, please Joshua, please."

"I think it's your turn to wait now," he muttered with a grin.

"But I need it, please," you whined, wrapping your legs around him.

"Touching yourself an hour ago wasn't enough, baby?" he lifted your chin to angle your head for him to press his lips to your own.

"No. You know it wasn't," you mewled. "I want you to fuck me. Right now," you moaned with a sigh.

Your fingers hooked on the hem of his black jeans and pulled him toward you, sliding his zipper down and undoing the button in one move.

"Fuck baby," he muttered in awe at your wild behaviour as your hand slid beneath his jeans to find him already hard beneath his underwear.

"I need you," you whined, ignoring the awe-struck look on his face.

He grabbed both your wrists and pulled them out of his pants, firmly clasping them together, his hand was large enough to secure them together in his fist as the other hand grabbed you by the jaw gently.

"You have some nerve after ignoring me all week," he muttered darkly. "Now you'll have to wait baby until I say so. Can you do that, sweetheart?"

You looked at his lust-lidded eyes bore into you and his smile slowly appeared on his face as you nodded.

"I can wait," you replied with an innocent tone.

"That's my girl," he cooed and sighed into your lips as he captured them with his own, giving you a heated kiss.

You broke the kiss abruptly and brought up a finger to caress his lower lip that was covered now with your saliva.

"You can fuck me raw now, Joshua," you whispered with a soft smile, almost kicking your feet in the air as you still sat on your table.

The audacity that possessed you to say that was totally new to you, it showed up in your crazy outbursts of assertiveness every time you were near him. Maybe you felt confident enough to be like that with him.

He shuddered slightly, but it was enough for you to see. "We're never getting there if you keep going, princess," he pressed his forehead against yours.

"So you're going to?" you asked, your voice dropped to a whisper.

"If that's what you want, baby," he muttered.

He was already breathing hard, his hands had dropped on your bare thighs, where he had started to knead on your skin anxiously.

"I want to," you replied instantly. "I need you to."

"You're killing me right now," he laughed softly before fixing his pants. "We need to go now, or we'll be regrettably late."

"Fine," you sighed. "Let's go."

He grabbed your head with his hands before crashing his lips with yours briefly but heatedly.

"Let's go," he muttered.

The ride there was longer than you expected. Joshua told you beforehand that his bandmates were already at the location where the event was going to be held.

And as he drove there, he started to get more and more jittery: anxiously licking his lips and tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.

"Are you okay, Shua?" you asked. "You're quiet."

He sent a look your way, but focused on the road ahead. "I'm okay. Just a bit nervous."

You gave him a reassuring smile, although he didn't get the chance to see it. "It's going to be fine. You'll see," you tried to comfort him by placing a hand flatly on his thigh.

He gently grabbed your hand and took it to his lips, pressing them on your knuckles. "Thank you, bunny. That's why I'm bringing you with me tonight."

Your heart fluttered a little. "Yeah? Why is that?"

"You give me good luck," he smirked.

You snorted, trying to play it cool. "You're so corny," you muttered.

He flashed you a downturned smile, briefly looking your way. "Shut up, I'm trying to flirt with you."

"Why? You're driving, there's not much we can do," you laughed, but then your laugh fainted. "Unless you want me to do something for you."

He blinked slowly as he let out a soft laugh. "Are you suggesting to blow me, baby?" he asked incredulously, glancing your way.

You shrugged. "Mmm, yeah. I thought that's where this conversation was headed."

"God, you are terrible at flirting," he said with a low chuckle, but you couldn't ignore how he leaned his head back and shifted on the seat a bit.

"Yeah, shocking," you smiled.

Joshua frowned, but didn't press any further. "I'd accept your proposition," he smiled slightly. "But we're arriving in about two minutes."

"I feel like there's a joke to be made here," you muttered with a smile.

His jaw dropped slightly. "Oh, no. Don't," he laughed.

"I just need one minute," you burst out laughing by the end of the joke.

He rolled his eyes briefly, but his smile was the biggest you've seen. "You have the humor of a child," he said while shaking his head.

You collected yourself, feigning to brush a tear from the corner of your eye.

"Are you done?" he asked, looking torn between amused and disappointed by your bad joke.

"Come on, laugh a little," you pushed his shoulder slightly.

Your joke wasn't even remotely funny, you knew that, but Joshua was still smiling when he parked in a large parking lot There were a lot of cars around and people gathering and walking in groups towards the entrance of a park.

"Where are we?" you asked as you unclasped your seatbelt.

Joshua appeared to be in a hurry, probably reverting back to his state of anxiousness after being distracted successfully by you. "Come on, bunny."

He jumped out of his large jeep and went around it to get your door.

"Oh, what a gentleman. Thanks," you smiled as he offered you a hand to climb down.

"Here," he muttered as his hands clasped on what appeared to be an access pass, which he put around your neck.

"Oh? Thank you, Joshua," you grabbed the tag to read that it was an all access pass.

"Don't mention it," you looked up to see a light smile on his face. "Follow me."

He led you to the side entrance which was fenced off, a sign at the entrance reading "AUTHORIZED ONLY" and you practically followed him through the maze of sound and lighting equipment carefully arranged on the floor.

There was a lot to be on the lookout for as you tried to keep up with him. There were rows of cables taped or secured to the ground that you almost tripped over.

Joshua seemed to notice your struggle and reached out to grab your hand firmly. "Careful, princess," he showed you a downturned smile, jittery eyes glancing down to his large hand grabbing yours. "Is this okay?"

You felt your heartbeat on your throat as you could only muster up a nod. "Yeah," you breathed, holding onto his hand.

The place he was walking through and to which he was practically dragging you with him was a large tent with long tables, people gathered around, chatting and drinking.

The smell of weed and tobacco permeated the air, laughter and the hum of the crowd with that of the music in the distance filled your ears.

"There you are, Shuji—oh, I see why you're late," Jihoon politely nodded your way and waved.

"Hi," you waved back shyly.

Joshua released your hand gently, smoothly using it to fix his dark hair with a labored sigh. "I thought I was on time," he frowned. "Isn't our go in an hour?"

"Yes, but we were asked for our instruments for soundcheck half an hour ago," the drummer shook his head nervously.

"And?" Joshua smiled playfully. "Did you need me to do that?"

"No, I don't need you, I'm just—forget it. In thirty minutes we go backstage for them to mic us up," he informed, just as jittery as you saw Joshua some minutes ago.

"Got it. Thanks Jihoon," he nodded and then turned to you. "You get drinks and food with your pass. I have to stay here, but you're free if you want to explore the festival," he tugged at the access pass hanging on your neck.

"Right, okay," you pressed your lips into a smile.

"We can meet back here once our gig is over," he offered. "Or I can join you where you are."

You looked up at his doe eyes. "You're going to do great, Joshua," you smiled reassuringly.

God, you wanted to kiss him so bad. In front of everyone, you didn't care who saw. But you also felt pathetic, anxiously eyeing his plump lips then back at his curious eyes.

He read you well. With a soft smile, his hand slid in the nape of your neck to hold you in place as he dipped his head to kiss you sweetly, one peck, then another. A sigh falling on your parted lips as he tenderly slid his lips in between your own.

"I'll be in the crowd," you promised with the faintest voice.

"I'll look for you," he smiled slightly at you, meeting your gaze with such fondness that you almost forgot where you were.

"I better be there then," you smirked at him, trying to contain your eagerness.

"Look at you being flirty with me," his smile grew and you almost died inside when his eyes turned into two crescent moons from how happy he looked.

"I–that wasn't flirting," you stuttered. "I'd better get going so you can get ready," you pulled away awkwardly.

Your heart sank as the smile on his face slowly faded.

Joshua looked at you the way he always did when he figured you out, but just nodded with his head, if he had anything else to say, he kept it to himself.

"See you in a bit?" he asked with a playful smile.

"See you in a bit, Shua," you smiled back and turned around and followed your way back through the crowds of artists and crew men and women and into the actual music festival.

The sun had already dipped, the chill of the air in the beautiful park surrounded by tall trees seemed to be setting in despite the huge crowds of people amassing around the stages, those which were three in total.

In your little exploration around the merch and food stalls, you found out that Midnight Haze were presenting on the main stage, two bands before the headliners. So that's why Joshua looked reasonably anxious: this was hugely important for a local band such as his.

You thought that this could prove an opportunity for them to be scouted for plenty more gigs. And you hoped that would be the case. You honestly wished for his band to have more recognition, they deserved it.

You explored all the food stalls, not feeling really hungry but yet indulging in what appealed to you the most. Everything was free for you, having an all access pass circling your neck, but you didn't feel the need to overuse it.

Except for strawberry mojitos, you were sipping on the third one by the time you circled back toward the big stage, showing your pass to security and they pointed you to the VIP section, directly in front of the stage where Joshua's mic stand stood.

Behind the mic stand the stage crew rolled a platform with Jihoon's bright red drum set, surrounded by a number of large cymbals. The crew expertly made a brief soundcheck and left. Your stomach tightened in excitement for the members of Midnight Haze, not just Joshua.

It seemed they had a plan, Jihoon stepped on the stage first, walking to the platform the crew had set with his large drum set. He sat on the stool and shifted a bit, finding his preferred way of sitting.

You spotted Vernon's bass guitar carefully placed on a guitar stand. It was white and had stickers all over it, some of them had washed over around the pickup area. When he picked it up and threw the red strap around his shoulder he also seemed to shift and get ready.

The crowd pushed you softly around as the people around you moved to get closer to the fences. Even if you stood in the VIP section, it was completely packed, the murmur of the crowd rose, some people whistled loudly impatiently.

When Joshua stepped under the stage lights, the crowd went completely insane. The large screens framing the stage showed the full stage, now complete with the lead singer as he grabbed a white guitar, lifting the strap to place it on one of his shoulders.

Joshua turned around and you saw him nodding his head at Jihoon, who returned the gesture at him to then raise his arms in the air to clash his drumsticks three times before starting off with a loud bang.

The booming sound of the towers of speakers filled your body, vibrating in your insides and making your bones feel the energy that instantly ignited the crowd, including you.

Midnight Haze started their set with one of their songs you liked the most. And you were pleased to see that Joshua smiled as he sang to the lyrics of the song.

The electrifying presence of the lead singer was so mind boggling to you, for a second it didn't seem like you were seeing your next door neighbor singing and playing his guitar as he danced side to side, banging his head slightly to the beat.

People screamed and applauded as the first song came to its end and Joshua bowed his head politely. Then he paused to remove one of his in-ear pieces to listen to the cheering of the crowd properly. He approached the stand, wrapping one hand around the mic.

"How's it going Rock Fest?" his voice boomed with excitement, a small chuckle came out of his plump lips when the crowd responded with wordless screams.

"We're Midnight Haze and we're really excited to be here," Joshua spoke into the mic, his starry eyes lost in the sea of faces, marveling at the sight of how extensive the crowd was.

"I want to see you all singing and dancing. Come on!" he screamed energetically just as the music swept in again.  

You cheerily sung along all of the songs in their set list, swaying your body mindlessly from side to side, looking over at the stage where Joshua also sang and played his guitar.

He looked devastatingly beautiful. His big eyes closed briefly, his brow furrowing slightly in focus, the vein in his neck popping up as he sang his lungs out.

The stage lights bathed his face with red and pink lights as the music wrapped him in a moment for his guitar solo, he looked hypnotic to you, almost heavenly.

You were so attracted to him you felt like a moth flying straight into the flame. You simply couldn't contain your urge to grab your phone and snap a photo of the moment.

God, you're screwed for life, you realized as you watched him.

Their setlist was about to come to a wrap after another one of your favorite songs ended on a strenuous note and Joshua's eyes went through the sea of faces. The stage lights danced around and pointed at the crowd at the same time his eyes zeroed on you, his brow relaxed and he smiled slightly.

"We've come to our last song," he spoke into the mic, his smile broadening when the crowd responded in wordless discontent. "We thank you for being here and for being such an amazing crowd," he paused, seemingly enjoying the roar of the sea of people in front of him. "We were Midnight Haze. Thank you, Rock Fest!!"

They started playing what their last song was, which was a song that you didn't know yet and apparently was a new song, since no one around you seemed to sing along with Joshua, who kept his big smile throughout as he sang and danced around the stage with his guitar.

He looked at you once as he strolled with his guitar directly in front of you. The people standing behind you screamed in your ears and you smiled at the sheer commotion he caused just by stopping by.

You twiddled your fingers at him, which he caught immediately and nodded his head at you, smiling tiredly with his tongue dangling between his chapped lips.

"He's so fucking hot oh my god," someone said with a raw voice from screaming, you turned and you saw two girls holding each other in excitement from the brief exchange.

It was amusing to think that you weren't the only one subdued by the beauty of the lead singer. It was also somewhat amusing that you were exhilarated at the fact that he singled you out from the crowd, but obviously no one around you knew that.

Joshua returned to the mic to sing the last verse, to then thank the other two members of Midnight Haze and say goodbye, promptly leaving the stage as the crowd screamed and applauded for them.

You quickly made your way out of the VIP section and found the nearest entrance back to the tent where you last saw Joshua. There were still some people hanging out in the tent, though admittedly not as many stuck around, possibly enjoying the festival and the food.

When Joshua came back, he looked a mixture of euphoric, tired and happy. As he spotted you, he opened his arms in excitement and you threw yourself in his embrace, lifting you in the air as your lips met briefly in an affectionate kiss.

"You were amazing," you told him, looking at his face briefly before he returned you to the ground.

Then you slowly came to your senses and stepped back from him slightly.

"You think so?" he asked, unaware of your sudden change in behavior. "Cause that felt amazing! That was the largest crowd we've ever performed for."

Your heart swelled at seeing him so excited, he grabbed you by the shoulders and shook you and you laughed at the crazed energy he still had from the stage.

"Come with me," he grabbed you by your hand as he led you out of the tent and to an even larger tent that was more crowded than the one you just left and right behind the stage.

It looked somewhat like a private party, the people in there, the majority of them, looked already intoxicated. The atmosphere was one of fun and a bit of mischief, however, you couldn't help but think that the energy of the packed room wasn't exactly inviting. Despite being hand in hand with the lead singer of one of the bands that had just come off the stage.

Your innate shy behavior kicked in, and you partially hid yourself behind Joshua, lowering your gaze as people not only looked at him, but also noticed you.

Joshua finally found the rest of his bandmates, who were already drinking a beer and talking about the very fresh experience. Jihoon, naturally, was retelling everything that just happened to a couple of faces you've never met before.

"Ah, there you are, Josh," one of them said, which was a woman. "We were wondering about you."

"Sorry, I had to go collect her," he nodded towards you. He then introduced you to the couple of strangers by name. "They're Chaewon and Taewon, from Wilted Willows."

"Hi," you waved at them, pressing your lips into a shy smile. You briefly saw the last bits of their performance, which was very unlike Midnight Haze's.

Chaewon's dark eyes scanned you up and down, making the hairs on the back of your neck prickle.

"Is she your new girlfriend?" she asked bluntly, her eyes moving from your face to Joshua's face.

"Oof, this is going to get weird," Jihoon muttered beside you and sipped from his can of coke zero.

Joshua released your hand. "No," he responded flatly, clearly setting a boundary between him and Chaewon. Then you felt his arm sliding on your shoulders, pulling your body into a tight side hug. "Not yet, at least."

Your stomach dropped, your gaze met his and he immediately winked an eye at you, a thing for your eyes to see only.

"Mmph," the girl flipped her luscious blue hair aside. "When you get bored of that, you know where to find me."

It happened fast: Chaewon took a step forward, her lithe fingers reached out to Joshua's chin, and he instantly pulled back with a flinch, his arm pulling you closer to him as an act of instinctive protectiveness.

Looking deeply startled and just about when he seemed like he was going to tell her off, she left and her bandmate had no choice but to leave with her after the deeply alarming exchange.

Joshua released a labored sigh. "Seriously, Jihoon?" he dropped the arm from your shoulders.

"What, they came to me," he shrugged. "I didn't know she was going to pull all that."

"Who is she... is she your ex?" you asked, trying to appear fine and controlled.

"No. God, no," Joshua shook his head furiously. "She's just really self-absorbed."

"She is also obsessed with Shua. Crazy stalker level of obsession," Jihoon explained briefly.

"Ah," you frowned.

The only reason why you thought she might've been Joshua's ex was because of how comfortable she was to attempt to put her hands on him.

Even if she were his ex, she overstepped by trying to touch him like that.

"Fucking hell," Jihoon muttered to himself, spotting something in between the groups of people. "Vernon's getting fucked up again."

Jihoon left abruptly, towards the direction of the bassist. Leaving you and Joshua alone. 

"I'm so sorry about that," Joshua's face had contorted into a frown. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," you smiled calmly despite yourself, trying to not let your anger show. "That was unsettling."

"Yeah, I agree. Really disturbing," he sighed again, running a hand through his dark hair.

"I'm sorry you have to deal with that, Joshua," you offered with a downturned smile.

"Don't be," he shook his head. "I'm more worried about you, she undermined you and I couldn't say anything about it."

"But I'm unaffected," you countered. "Her problem is not with me, that much is evident."

He flashed you a relaxed smile. "Sorry about the girlfriend stuff, I panicked."

A sudden painful feeling made you almost flinch. "Don't worry, Shua. I would've panicked a little too."

But you were thankful that he was being honest. He still looked agitated from the unfortunate exchange, but his shoulders went slack when you reached out to grab his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Hey, don't let that ruin your night," you told him encouragingly.

"Yeah, no, I'm fine," he frowned.

"You want me to fuck her up?" you asked bluntly.

His doe eyes widened. "What?!" then he understood you were joking and laughed hard, almost bending over with laughter. "Where did that come from?"

You broke your act and smiled at him. "I wanted to make you laugh. It worked," you shrugged.

"You fighting... now that would be fun to see," he admitted with a smile. "Fun and weird. Can't imagine you doing that."

"Well, don't try me," you quipped.

He chuckled again, brushing a tear from his eye.

A bunch of people stopped by to say hi to him and you stood idly by, watching Joshua expertly navigate through small talks, compliments and questions. And though you mostly didn't get attention within these exchanges, you were happy to be there, experiencing him.

"You are famous," you pointed, impressed by the amount of people that came to say hello and even take pictures with him.

"I'm not famous, bunny. This is kind of a network, everyone here knows everyone," he explained, but the tip of his ears were red.

"Right," you scoffed. "I don't see a lot of people asking others for their photo."

He rolled his eyes. "Shut up, it makes me feel weird."

"Are you blushing?" you gasped dramatically. "The Joshua Hong is blushing?!"

He arched his pierced eyebrow at you. "Don't make fun of me," he muttered shyly but you just couldn't help but laugh at how cute he looked when flustered. 

"Aw, baby boy is shy?" you pouted at him.

He blinked slowly, biting his lower lip to attempt and stop his smile. "This is the last time I bring you to something like this."

You simply continued. "Can I get your photo, Shua? Joshie, can I get your autograph?" you laughed as his smile grew, rolling his eyes at you again.

Joshua nodded at you once, letting out a breath through a smirk. "Having fun?"

A shiver ran down your spine. "A bit, if I'm honest," you admitted, but were actually more excited about his sudden change in attitude.

"Alright, princess. Let's have fun," he muttered, clasping his hand around yours to drag you once again through the crowd of people and outside the tent.

"Joshua!" you squealed, your smile had since vanished from your face as you looked around to see that he was dragging you towards a line of parked bus trailers.

You assumed that there was no one around since Joshua confidently shoved your back against the side of a bus trailer, making you gasp at the sheer force he used with you.

His eyes widened in disbelief when you smiled at him deviously. "You wanted this," he realized. "Do you enjoy this, baby?"

"I do," you nodded, breathing hard in anticipation already as Joshua closed in on you.

His fingers grazed your chin. "You want me to toss you around, pretty?" he asked, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly.

A shudder ran through your body. "Yeah," you sighed. "I want you to do whatever you want to me, Joshua."

Joshua looked at you in pure fascination, he even let out a soft sigh that brushed your face slightly.

"You..." he breathed but stopped, seemingly at a loss of words.

His head dipped and you closed your eyes, blindly grabbing his head with your hands as he kissed you hard on your lips. 

"I want you, Joshua," you whimpered into his hot mouth, the words felt urgent as you uttered them. "Now."

"What if someone sees?" he incited, his voice low and raspy.

"I don't care," you confessed, the statement shaking deep in your bones.

The fleeting confidence in you stirred something in your brain, telling you to act quick.

It was your turn to push him against the bus trailer behind him. He gasped in surprise as his back hit the metal wall, his eyebrow raising a bit.

You clasped your lips with his, earning a low groan from him that reverberated in his chest and against your hands that were sliding down to the belt of his pants.

"What are you doing?" he asked, his hands stopping you.

You faltered instantly. "I-I want to suck you off," your eyes read his face. "Can I?"

His hand released one of yours to cup your chin. "Why?"

You frowned. "Why, what do you mean, why?"

He nodded briefly. "Tell me you're not doing this because you feel bad for what happened earlier in the tent."

"I want to pleasure you," you explained, then you quickly relaxed, understanding the situation. "Don't think I'm doing this for any other reason than just for you."

His eyes scanned your face, his other hand released you to graze your cheek with his knuckles, the features of his face relaxing. "What's our safeword, bunny?"

You blinked slowly, showing him a smile before giving him your safeword.

"Fuck," he let out a puffy breath as your fingers resumed undoing his belt, to then get the button of his black jeans.

"You're so hard already," you cooed softly, and eyed him as your hand felt him over his underwear.

Joshua was biting his lower lip, looking strained already. "All for you, sweetheart."

You smiled at him sweetly. "Such a sweet talker," you tilted your head as you rubbed his hard cock through his underwear.

You stuck your hand through the slit of his boxers, grabbing his hard cock firmly and effectively pulling it free from the stretchy and wet fabric of his underwear. 

"You're being so naughty, princess," he chuckled at you faintly but he faltered completely as you lowered yourself to your knees before him.

The ground was hard against the soft skin of your knees, the thin layer of your stockings was not enough to protect them. But you knew you wanted to see the bruises by the following morning.

"Fuck," he muttered again, shuddering visibly when you kissed the tip of his cock, to then press your tongue on the slit to lick his precum as you locked eyes with him.

One large hand cupped your cheek, his eyes trained on you as your tongue gave a few strokes to his shaft, feeling the vein that marked in the underside, tracing a long line with your tongue until you wrapped your mouth around his cockhead.

You heard a low guttural groan leave him when you took him deeper in your mouth than you could before, your tongue lapping on the length of him as you moved your head back and forth. 

Darting a look at him, Joshua leaned his head back on the wall behind him, eyes closed and swallowing hard as you bobbed your head back and forth on his throbbing cock, swirling your tongue around his cockhead.

"God. Your mouth feels so, so fucking good, baby," he moaned faintly, his hands grabbing a handful of your hair.

The back of your mouth had started to hurt already from the intrusion each time you tried to take his cock deeper in your mouth. But you didn't care, all focus was in getting more sounds of approval from him. Sounds that were also making you aroused. 

Drool had started to drip down from the corners of your lips and onto your chin, wet sounds coming every time you pulled your head back, hollowing your cheeks to suck hard on his cock just as if it were a lolly.

"Fuck," he exhaled. "You don't know how much I needed you, baby."

A moan coiled in your throat, your walls throbbing desperately at the sound of his words. Your chest swelled proud when you felt his fingers tense up on your hair and you heard him moan faintly, cussing and muttering incoherently about your mouth and how good it felt.

"Fuck, fuck—I think someone's coming," he whispered but didn't make an attempt of stopping you, so you didn't.

Voices echoed in the distance, but you couldn't make out if someone actually saw you and Joshua. There was no actual acknowledgement towards what you were doing, but you felt euphoric all the same.

Being on your knees for him, sucking him off for anyone to see made you moan on his cock. You sneaked a look at Joshua's eyes, that were trained on you while your head bobbed back and forth, committed to the act of pleasuring him.

"Someone just saw you giving me head," his voice sounded raw. "You like this, don't you? Like taking my cock in your mouth for anyone to see."

You moaned a sound of confirmation, making the smile on his face grow just a little. He let out a weak sigh, the tension in his beautiful features showing that he was close.

"I'm close," he sighed and threw his head back a bit. His hand tightened on your hair slightly when you sucked him harder. "Fuck, baby. D'you want me to cum in your pretty mouth?" his thumb brushed your cheekbone gently, as if calling for your attention back to him.

You blinked at him, moaning the same sound again.

"Can I move, princess? You think you're ready for that?" he asked, his face and voice both strained.

You nodded with your head as you pulled your mouth back to suck on his cockhead, blinking an adoring look up at him.

"Tap my thigh if you need me to stop," he grabbed your head firmly and started thrusting his cock on your mouth.

Sloppily at first, almost as if he wanted you to adjust your mouth to his pace as he started to push his cock down your throat faster. You lifted your eyes to see his face deep in focus, probably containing himself to avoid hurting you by accident.

The feeling was so deeply arousing that you were tempted to sneak a hand between your legs and start touching yourself. But you were rendered immobile, not by his hands precisely, but by the sight of him fucking your mouth.

"Fuck, baby—I'm cumming. You're gonna take it all, right baby? Gonna swallow it all?" he groaned, revelling at the sight of you taking his cock, your eyes brimming with tears, your chin dripping with your own drool.

You were gagging loudly on his cock, but managed to get the slightest of nods.

"Yeah, you are," he cooed faintly when he saw the way you responded to his words.

Then he threw his head back, his face contorted in pure pleasure and you almost swore you could come from the sight alone. 

"God, fuck," his voice was a mere whisper as his cockhead bumped on the back of your mouth, his cum spurting down your throat and you instantly swallowed it.

Joshua groaned through clenched teeth as you swallowed the last drops of his cum, he screwed his eyes shut, exhaling elatedly at the same time that his hands gently released your hair.

"That was insane," he muttered slowly, appearing to come to his senses.

Gently, he pulled out of your mouth, a string of saliva falling out of your mouth and landed on your chin. He fixed his pants quickly before grabbing your hands that were previously resting on his thighs.

Joshua helped you stand up and immediately wrapped you in a tight embrace. Bringing a hand up to clean your face from your drool and tears.

"You did so good, bunny," he muttered in your lips after kissing you chastely. "So fucking good."

"'m glad you liked it," you smiled in his lips.

"Let's take you home, princess. I want to make you feel good too," he gave you small pecks on your lips. "Is that okay?"

"Can't you take me here? Right now?" you whined jokingly.

"No, baby," he whispered into your lips. "As much as I'm dying to do that right now, I don't want to risk anyone seeing you."

"But you didn't have an issue with it five minutes ago," you quipped.

"Yeah, but that was different. You were fully clothed and the person who saw us didn't see our faces," he pointed. 

"So the problem is that you don't want anyone to see me naked?" you pulled back to meet his gaze. "In that case I can keep my dress on." 

The conversation had shifted between you, and you could tell that he was no longer trying to keep you aroused—he didn't even look like he just got blown. You didn't know what it was, but it troubled him.

Joshua looked up at the night sky, seemingly looking frustrated for a second as he looked for words to say.

"What if I'm a little possessive too?" he asked, meeting your eyes.

You physically recoiled in his arms in a mixture of excitement and uneasiness. "W-what?" you blurted in disbelief.

"What if I don't want anyone seeing what I have with you?" his eyes searched your face. "Even if you kept your dress on, I don't want anyone seeing how good you are for me."

Your heart dropped, pain sinking into your chest. This was totally not what you expected to hear from him. Even if his possessiveness was entirely revolving around a sexual aspect, you weren't ready to hear it.

"Joshua-," you started.

"I know I said that I'd fuck you anywhere but I just can't give you that right now," he smiled, seemingly ashamed of his words.

"No, it's alright," you frowned. "It's just really confusing hearing you say this."

"What, you don't think I'm capable of feeling a little jealous too?" he asked. "You don't like the idea of me seeing other girls, I don't like the idea of someone seeing you."

Was this something you needed to talk in more depth with him? Totally, yes. Were you going to ask him to do so? No, probably not ever.

"Fair," you muttered, mustering a smile to him before capturing his lips with your own. "Take me home, then."

Joshua took your hand again, making your tummy flutter with nervousness that only intensified when he led you back to the tent.

As you both pushed through Joshua's friends and unknown faces, you swore that everyone looked at you differently; not in a bad or good way precisely, just different. As though everyone knew why you and Joshua disappeared, and judging by the fact that someone saw you, they probably did already.

Joshua kept you close, almost as though wanting to make his point across—he felt possessive of you. And you didn't want to know to which extent he felt like this over you. 

But you knew one thing, whatever it was that made him look this deeply troubled, paired with your unspoken feelings for him was starting to taint your already messy relationship of fuckbuddies.

Joshua drove faster this time around, keeping a hand on the wheel and the other placed flatly on your thigh.

"Did you enjoy the festival?" he asked, his thumb had started to draw invisible circles on your thigh.

"I did," you smiled. "Drank mojitos and ate corn dogs," you told him, looking at his large hand. You resisted the urge to grab it and lace your fingers with his.

"Mojitos?"

"Strawberry mojitos," you added. "I took some photos too, of you, on stage."

"You did? Will you show me?" he eyed you excitedly.

"Of course," you smiled at him.

"So you got a good spot to see me?"

"Yeah I got to see you throughout the whole set," you saw him smile faintly.

"I saw you singing along," he seemed to remember suddenly. "You've been listening to our music."

"Yeah," you admitted. "Almost everyday. Does that make me your groupie?"

He chuckled. "I'm convinced that you don't know what a groupie is, bunny."

"Shuddup," you smiled.

"Hey, but it's not fair—you can listen to my music but I haven't read your book," he frowned.

"I'll lend you the hardcopy of my manuscript," you promised.

"I actually looked for you, do you use a pen name?"

Your heart sank. He took the time to search your books using your real name?

You told him your pseudonym and he repeated each name silently and nodded. 

"Yeah, I might've confused the lady at the local library," he laughed.

"You went to the library looking for my books using my real name," he nodded and you laughed. "You should've asked me first."

"You never answer my texts on time," he reproached. "Well but I wanted it to be a secret, actually."

"Why?" you frowned.

"I wanted to impress you," he shrugged.

"You don't have to, Joshua," you told him sincerely.

"But I want to," he pouted cutely. "And now that I know you've been listening to my music, I feel like I have to catch up with you."

"I like your music. I'm not sure if you're going to like my books," you warned him.

"Let me decide that," he smiled at you.

Joshua parked his car expertly with one hand, his other hand still resting on your thigh. He had stopped rubbing circles through the thin fabric of your stockings, but your skin felt hot at his touch nonetheless.

Your fingers fidgeted nervously with the hem of the skirt of your little black dress as you stepped on the elevator, Joshua stood closely behind you.

"Are you nervous?" he asked in your ear, leaning closer to you.

"A bit," you breathed, turning on your feet to see his face.

"Why?" he slowly smirked. "We've done this before."

You were lucky that no one else was in that elevator, but you still waited until you got to your apartment to continue that conversation.

Joshua gently pushed you against the wall as soon as he closed your apartment door.

"Mm? Why are you nervous, bunny?" he asked in a soft tone.

"I've never been fucked raw," you confessed, fighting the blush that crept immediately on your face.

His eyes searched your face briefly. "We don't have to do that tonight, we can use protection."

"No, don't get me wrong—I want to... do it raw," you breathed, your hands fidgeting with the collar of his meshy black shirt. "I'm just..."

You bit your tongue. You felt excited to try new things with Joshua, and what really got you feeling that way was that you were trying these things with someone you were actually falling in love with.

"What?" he egged you on, his curious eyes still trying to read your face.

You licked your lips anxiously and shook your head, reluctant to continue.

"We can take it slow, if that's what you want," he offered.

"No, do-don't hold back," you stuttered. "I want everything."

"I got you. Don't worry," he muttered before placing two fingers to grab your chin and leaned to kiss you.

You melted into his lips, feeling every nerve in your body respond at his touch when he slid his other hand on your waist, giving it a soft squeeze.

"I almost forgot to tell you," he breathed after pulling back from your lips. "You looked beautiful tonight, baby."

"Did you like my dress?" you darted a look down to your little black dress.

"Thank you for wearing it tonight," he grazed your cheek. "I liked it very much." 

"It's a good thing I didn't wear the bunny pjs then," you smirked though your blushing face.

He laughed faintly. "Yeah, good thing," he echoed dazedly, leaning to kiss you again.

God, if you could only just ask him. Does he feel the same way too? When your mouths join, when you breathe against each other, moaning and gasping at the slightest of touches against each other's skin.

Your fingers started undoing the buttons of his shirt, your hands sneaking between the split of his shirt to feel his hard chest, the defined muscles of his pecs.

Joshua moaned into your lips, his hands sliding from your waist to find your hips. His hot mouth placed open mouthed kisses on your chin, groaning in approval when you tilted your head back for him to kiss on the underside of your jaw.

Your back was pressed against the wall as his hands searched for your thighs and expertly lifted you up from the floor. You let out a squeal in surprise, your arms instantly locking around his shoulders.

A laugh in sheer joy left your lips when he carried you to your room. "We could've walked here."

"Shh, let me do nice things for you," he muttered as he let you back to the floor of your room and you got to the lamp on your nightstand.

He grabbed you by your waist, pulling you to his body as he sat down on your bed, leveling down to see eye to eye with you. His large hand slid on the nape of your neck as his lips found yours, tenderly locking you into a kiss.

Joshua was still wearing his shirt on his shoulders, the split parting as your fingers caressed the defined lines of the muscles on his abdomen, and then he moaned on your mouth when you reached his lats, that being a sensitive area for him.

"How do I get you out of this?" he smiled sheepishly when his fingers searched on your back and then on your sides.

"It's a slip dress," you explained, smiling too.

Your fingers grabbed the shoulder straps, sliding them from your arms and the dress simply fell from your frame, leaving your body with the light pink lingerie set you chose for tonight.

"Do you like it?" you asked sheepishly when he seemed unable to look back at your eyes.

Joshua swallowed hard, tearing his doe eyes from the lacey fabric barely covering your body and found your expectant eyes. "Yeah, baby," he released a breath through a weak smile. "I love it."

Your hands went to grab the clasp of your pretty bra, but he raised a hand from your waist.

"No, not yet," he muttered. "I want to take it off myself. Is that okay?"

"Yeah. More than okay," you sighed, repurposing your hands to remove his meshy black shirt from his shoulders, caressing his beautiful skin in the process.

His large hands busied themselves exploring your bare skin too, what your thigh high stockings didn't cover, caressing your bare waist as he leaned to press wet kisses down your chest, to the swell of your breasts.

"So beautiful," he muttered, as if to himself.

"Joshua," you moaned with a sigh as his hands circled on your back and slid down to cup your ass with a low guttural groan from his part.

"Don't rush this," he muttered against your skin, then glanced up to meet your eyes.

"Okay," you breathed, your skin already prickled and covered in goosebumps.

He smiled, his fingers reaching up to graze your chin. "We have all night, you don't have to rush anything."

"Oh, so you're going to fuck me all night?" you quipped with a grin.

"If that's what you want," he replied with a small shrug.

"I do. But what do you want, Joshua?" you retorted.

His gaze darkened as it met yours, he seemed to struggle with his words for the second time in the night, something that did not go unnoticed by you, but you decided not to make a big deal of it at the time.

Joshua didn't reply to your question verbally, instead he stood from your bed, your eyes following him now that he regained his natural height, now his frame towered over you.

He pushed you to sit on the bed, wordlessly making you understand that the roles were reversed for now and you resumed to undress him. Undoing his belt and button from his black jeans, hooking your fingers to push his jeans down on his legs for him to step out of them, socks included.

It was your turn to swallow hard at the sight of him nearly naked. He was hard already, as you could see the bulge in his underwear, your hand instantly rubbing his hard cock through the stretchy fabric.

"Lie down, princess," he muttered, nodding to the bed.

You scooted back on your bed covers and lied down as Joshua climbed on top of your body.

"Are you okay?" you asked, your voice laced with a bit of concern.

"Yeah," he breathed, pressing a kiss on your lower lip. "Never better."

He grabbed your legs and you wrapped them around his body, pressing down on his hips to join them with yours, earning a soft moan from him.

"Joshua?" you breathed when his lips trailed from your mouth, pressing wet kisses down the crook of your neck.

"Mm?"

"Ca-can I be on top?" you asked.

"Do you want to ride me, baby? Is that what you're asking?" he asked with his sweet voice.

"Let me be on top," you muttered, lowering your legs from his body.

He laughed against your skin. "Okay," he sighed, rolling over so his back was fully against the bed and you followed his body promptly, straddling him.

You wasted no time, leaning your body to press your chest against his, burying your fingers in his black hair before capturing his lips with yours.

His hands caressed your back, the pads of his fingers tracing the line of your column and stopping only to unclasp your pretty bra, his hands removed it completely, you heard when it landed on the floor.

His breath hitched when you pressed your tits against his hard chest, moving your lips to kiss his chin, then under his jaw and  down the crook of his neck, essentially mimicking what he does when he's on top of you.

"Can I mark you?" you asked shyly, darting a look to his face.

A small groan fell from his lips as he nodded with his head. "Yeah," he whispered with a light smile.

You returned the smile as your head dipped on the crook of his neck, his hands kneading on your hips as you landed love bites on the crook of his neck, his throat and finally reaching his toned chest.

Joshua was sensitive. It made you feel so stupid to realize it this far into your countless sexual encounters. He so rarely let you touch him during sex or kiss him that you never knew just how sensitive he actually was.

His hands were going to leave marks on your skin, you were sure of it. Kneading on your ass and hips, fingers digging harshly on your skin as you took your time marking his chest, marveling at the sight of his toned pecs.

"Fuck," he breathed softly, his eyes were closed tightly, so he never saw you smile at his downright restless behaviour. You and him had that in common, at least.

You couldn't ignore how big and hard he felt under you, so you started grinding on him to maybe help him release the growing tension on his cock.

Then you wanted to try something—you ran your tongue on one of his sides, feeling his toned lats, tasting cologne in his skin.

"Mmn—fuck!" his body hardened, his fingers threatening to pierce your skin.

The tip of your tongue traced a circle around one of his nipples to then press your wet lips and repeated the same actions on his other side, earning similar reactions.

A groan bubbled in his chest and suddenly you were being flipped to your back, startled you looked at his dark eyes. Unable to say a word, his mouth was already clashing with yours, kissing you fervently.

"Are you going to tie me up tonight?" you asked shyly.

His pierced eyebrow arched slightly. "Do you think you deserve it, pretty? Have you been bad?"

"Mmm, maybe a little," you admitted.

"Mmm yeah, I remember that you were, baby. Do you like being bratty? Do you like being tied up?" his fingers hooked on the thin fabric of your thong, pulling his body back to slide the thong down your legs, leaving your stockings on.

"Yeah, I do," you breathed, your eyes trained on him as he pressed soft kisses on the softer side of your thighs.

"Then I won't tie you tonight, princess," he smiled deviously to then run the tip of his tongue on the sensitive side of your thigh, dangerously close to your core.

You let out a soft whimper, your body tensed up and your legs instinctively closed a bit, one of your legs bumped with the side of his head.

"Maybe I'll get restraints for your legs too," he quipped, laughing softly. "Would you like that, baby?"

You swallowed hard, closing your eyes when he continued placing loving and soft kisses on your mound. "Mm, I think so," you muttered clumsily.

He used his hands to splay your thighs open for him, dipping his head on your mound to place wet kisses on your soft skin, sighing in the process of kissing your pussy lips, groaning softly with you when he heard you moan and whine.

"Joshua," you called softly when his tongue swiped a line between your folds, humming in response at the taste of your arousal.

One of his hands slotted in your lower tummy, while the other one remained holding your thigh. His face was practically buried in your cunt, slowly licking every inch of it, dipping the tip of his tongue on your entrance to make you cry out and moan his name.

You held onto his hand that was on your tummy when his tongue swirled around your clit a few times. "Oh god," you whimpered

The bed underneath you groaned when you sank your body, completely subdued in pleasure. Your fingers clenching on his fingers, the other had found the soft strands of his black hair, pulling softly when he started flicking your swollen clit with the tip of his tongue.

"F-fuck—Joshua," you breathed, screwing your eyes shut, trying to remain still on your bed but couldn't help but writhe slightly when he switched from flicking your clit to sucking at it lightly.

You propped yourself with your elbows on your bed to see him practically making out with your cunt. The sight of it alone made you almost climax—his dark hair between your fingers, his hands holding you still for him as he lifted his eyes to find yours.

A moan coiled in your throat, your fingers tugged his hair as you felt your orgasm drawing near, and he seemed to know it from the sounds you were making, so he started sucking your swollen bud harder, moving his head up and down slightly.

"Joshua, 'm close," you breathed, your body trembling slightly. "Fuck! Don't stop, please. Joshua!"

You threw your head back, your jaw going slack too as raggedy breaths broke in your chest, twitching and groaning lewdly on your bed. You moaned loudly, your hand pressing on his head as your orgasm continued to wash over you, the waves of pure bliss left tingles on your limbs and face.

You eased your body back on your bed, your chest heaving embarrassingly hard, soft moans spilled from your lips when Joshua's mouth left your throbbing cunt after showering it with tender kisses.

"Feel good?" you heard him ask.

You opened your eyes to find him still between your thighs, smiling fondly at you.

"Amazing," you sighed weakly. "I love how you eat me out so much."

He laughed. "I love eating you out, princess."

"Oh, yeah?" you breathed.

Joshua climbed back on top of you. The dim light from your lamp let you see the pretty features of his face, you reached to wipe your arousal from his chin and he smiled as he pressed his chapped lips with your own.

"Yeah," he answered and you were reminded of how much you liked it when he said that.

He got on his knees to take his sweet time taking your stockings off, his hands caressing your legs in the process, his lust-lidded eyes locking with yours as he did so. 

Then he lied on his side, using his elbow on the bed to support him as his other hand slid between your legs, his pointer finger slid between your pussy lips, playing with your wetness as his eyes searched your face.

Your eyes shifted to the finger disappearing inside your cunt, pumping in and out a few times until you were ready for another finger.

"Joshua," you whimpered pathetically when his two fingers massaged your walls, but really what had you on the verge of insanity was his doe eyes trained on your face.

"Mm?" his eyebrows arched slightly. "What's wrong?"

"I want you so bad," you breathed, your hand cupping his cheek to pull him into a needy kiss, nibbling his lower lip with your teeth when his fingers scissored inside you.

"You think you're ready for me, sweetheart?" he muttered, his voice strained with tension.

You nodded a bit too eagerly.

"No, I don't think you're ready, baby," he replied, introducing a third finger inside you.

"Joshua," you whined, knowing that he liked hearing you beg. "Please. I waited all day. Please take me,"

He smiled, immediately telling on your little game. "Yeah, you waited all day for me princess, after ignoring me all week. Why should I give you what you want?"

"Because you want it too," you replied boldly. "I know you want me as much as I want you."

"Mmm, yeah baby, you're right. I want you but I wait for you," his doe eyes locked with yours. "Can you say you do the same for me, baby? You like having fun by pushing me away, so why shouldn't I have fun too?"

"You're being mean, Shua," you frowned. "I didn't push you away, just–"

"Careful, princess," he warned, the corner of his lips twitching. "I don't like when you lie to me. You know that."

You moaned then he pressed the palm of his hand on your sensitive clit while still pumping three fingers in and out of your wet walls.

When you gave him no response nor explanation, he smiled. "So you were pushing me away. Again, baby?"

You remained quiet and looked away from his darkened gaze.

"Why do you do that?" he pressed, his voice sounding soft, alluring.

You groaned and bit your lip as he continued to massage your walls with his fingers, his palm stimulating your clit slowly toward another orgasm.

"Joshua," you sighed, closing your eyes. "Joshua, I'm cumming."

"No, you're not," he muttered softly, pulling his fingers out of your cunt when your walls had started clenching harder.

You gasped in frustration. "Joshua!" you whined. "I was close."

He let out a breathy chuckle and pressed his lips against your cheek. "I know, baby."

"Then why..? Why did you stop?" you asked.

"You're cumming when I want you to," he replied shortly.

You sighed your frustration, not caring how childish you were being. "You're mean," you pouted.

He laughed softly when your fingers hooked on the band of his underwear and yanked it down, his hard cock slapping his lower abdomen as he lifted his hips for you to tear off the last piece of clothing he wore.  

"And you lied to me, again," he countered as he climbed back on top of your body, pressing loving kisses to your cheeks and chin, each kiss seemed to leave a trail of tingles on your skin.

"I'm s–"

"Sorry?" he muttered, kissing your jaw.

"Joshua, please," you moaned weakly. "I'll be good, just—fuck me. Do whatever you want. Punish me but please, fuck me."

His eyes glinted with awe, and you remembered that he liked it when you begged. "You'll let me do anything I want, sweetheart?"

"Yes," you breathed. "I'm yours."

Joshua cocked his head to the side ever so slightly. "Say that again," he whispered, giving you another soft kiss now on your lips. And another.

"I'm yours, Joshua."

He hummed in satisfaction. "You're mine," he repeated, savoring the statement with his sweet lips.

"Only yours," you echoed dazedly.

"Oh, you cruel thing," he said darkly. "You know what you're doing, don't you?"

No response came from you. If he wanted answers, that was the best you could give him right now. And for a moment, he appeared to know that too.

A shudder invaded your body when Joshua grabbed his cock on one hand, dragging his cockhead on your wet folds. A soft breath spilled from his lips when he felt you, skin on skin.

"Ready?" Joshua searched your eyes again.

You nodded. "Ready," you breathed.

A low whimper coiled in your throat when he slowly eased himself in. Your hand held onto his shoulder, your eyes brimmed with tears from the pain of how big he actually felt without the extra lubrication that the condoms provided.

But you also moaned at how insanely good he felt raw. It was so good to finally feel him, every naked inch of him inside your walls, that you swore you would climax from just having him like this. 

"Breathe, baby," he whispered, kissing your moans with such tenderness that you almost broke.

"Joshua," you whimpered, your fingers digging on his shoulder.

"It's okay. I know, baby," he frowned slightly. "Do you want to stop?"

"No, no. I'm fine. Please," you begged, although you didn't know what you were begging for.

He released another breath when he finally bottomed out, your walls throbbed desperately around his length and he pressed his forehead against yours.

His eyelids fluttered closed before pulling his hips back, the feeling of his cock sliding out your wet walls felt good—so good that you were already whimpering and trembling.

"Okay?" he gasped, starting to push in and out of you.

"Yes, more than okay, Joshua," you stuttered, closing your eyes with a sigh.

"You're crying, baby," he pointed, he was still moving achingly slow.

"It-it's big—you're so big," you stammered pathetically.

He paused. "Am I hurting you?" his voice was laced with concern.

"No, it's not bad, Joshua. I can take it," you breathed.

It actually wasn't that bad—as he pushed his cock in and out you could feel your walls easing and stretching around it, adjusting to his size.

Joshua looked tense, he let out a groan when his hips started moving faster on you, then he pulled his body back, making you cry out in pleasure when the position of his cock inside you shifted, pressing on your front walls.

He brought a hand on your lower abdomen, his thumb finding your clit to start rubbing on it.

"Better?" he asked. He was still weary, his big eyes searching your face as he pushed his cock in and out on you, rubbing your clit to ease you from the lingering threads of pain.

"Yeah. Feels so good, Joshua," you sighed, swallowing thickly at the drag of his cock inside your walls. "So, so good."

"Yeah, I know," he replied with a low groan. "You feel good too, sweetheart. Fuck, so good."

You whimpered at the sound of his words, the way he pronounced each one with a tight jaw, his brow furrowing as he pushed his cock inside your walls at a delicious pace.

"So warm and wet, so fucking good, baby," he sighed.

His thumb pressed on your clit, rubbing it and teasing it senselessly, making you moan and squirm. It was too much, your hands clenched on your bed covers when you sensed your orgasm drawing near again.

"Oh, god. Fuck," you whimpered, writhing against your bed as Joshua dragged his cock in and out your clenching walls.

"Fuck," he groaned, his hips buckled for a second. "You're close. Right, bunny?"

You shook your head on your pillows.

Then, his fingers landed a slap right on your clit, making you yelp loudly. Clearly telling on your weak lie.

"Yes! Yes, I'm close, Joshua," you cried out.

He smirked in response, his hands holding your hips a second before he started ramming his cock faster inside your cunt. Your eyes widened at him and bit your lip hard enough to draw blood.

"Fuck," he muttered again before pulling out of you, right as your walls started clenching deliciously near your release.

"Joshua!" you whined, breathing furiously at him.

"Remember what I said," he was breathing hard too, probably because he was resisting his own pleasure only to edge you.

He carefully lowered his hard and wet cock on top of your tummy, you stifled a moan at the sheer size of it and the weight of it too. The reddened tip, the soft marks of a vein along the wet shaft, you bit your lip.

"Shua, please," you pleaded with a desperate sigh.

"That's not my name, baby," he snapped with a dark look.

"Joshua, I'll be good, just-"

"Tell me why I should believe you," he muttered as he moved to slide within your walls again, your heart swelled with a little satisfaction when he groaned in pleasure too. 

"I'll show you," you said weakly.

"Not good enough, princess," he shook his head as he slapped your pussy again, right in your sensitive clit.

"God, fuck!" you yelped loudly. "I'm sorry, Joshua. I'm sorry for pushing you away."

You moaned helplessly when leaned down a bit and spit on your cunt, covering your clit with his saliva to start rubbing circles on your swollen and oversensitive bud.

"Why, do you like to have me at your beck and call? You enjoy to fuck me and toss me away like one of your toys?" he muttered darkly.

Suddenly you regretted telling him to punish you, because he only wanted the truth from you, unlike last time he punished you and you had to try not utter a word while he fucked you into the bed.

But you could see that he was struggling to hold back, swallowing hard, his brow furrowed.

"No! You're not my toy—you're... you're," you stammered. Were you about to confess? Like this?

Your orgasm was threatening close, so you squirmed on your bed, trying to create some distance from his fingers teasing your clit. Joshua understood what you were attempting to do and started caressing it lightly, thinking that he was over stimming you.

"You're close?" he asked, realizing when he heard you sigh a moan.

But he didn't wait for your answer. Joshua pulled out again, his cock landing with a soft slap on your lower tummy. A single drop of cum dripped from his tip, but he wasn't cumming yet, you knew that by the way he was breathing in deeply, trying to contain himself.

If he only wanted the truth, you were deep in trouble. Because you push him away to avoid your growing infatuation over him.

"Joshua?" you called abruptly.

"Mm?" he lifted his gaze to find yours.

"What's your favorite color?" you asked breathlessly.

"What, why?" he frowned.

"Tell me," you pressed.

"Pink," he responded, his brow not relaxing.

"Really? That's cute," you sighed, Joshua's hips retracted from your body and he positioned himself again on his knees, his cock aligned with your core.

"Yours?" he asked with an air of reluctance.

You told him your favorite color.

"Why did I know you'd say that," he replied with a small smile.

"Your birthday?" you asked, feeling utterly pathetic.

He chuckled breathily. "What, why're you asking me this right now?"

"Tell me," you insisted. "Please."

"December 30th," he responded, looking confused.

A loud moan reverberated across your room, so loud that you almost wanted to cover your mouth when his cock sank into your walls again. He thrusted slowly, but then he continued rubbing your clit with his two middle fingers.

"What's yours, princess?" he asked, appearing to be following whatever you were trying to do. 

You told him your birthday through broken gasps.

"Still, I don't get why you ask," he breathed tiredly.

"I want to get to know you better," you told him with a whine.

Joshua smiled sweetly at you and that might've done it for you.

Your walls clenched around him and he groaned loudly, slamming his hips against you, the sound of his skin slapping against you filled the silence that followed between you.

Something you weren't expecting happened:  Joshua seemed to have forgotten about edging you, closing his eyelids tightly, his mouth parting a little. You loved to see when his face scrunched up like that, when he was so close that the muscles around his mouth relaxed, but his frown would deepen sweetly. 

Joshua threw his head back a little, a moan muffled in his mouth, his throat bobbing a little as he seemed to be immersed in pure pleasure. He didn't relent his hard thrusts on you, pushing his cock in and out your sopping walls while rubbing your clit expertly.

"Fuck, I can't—Joshua," you gasped. "I'm close. Please, please. Let me cum?"

Joshua groaned before lowering his gaze back at you. "Where do you want me, baby?"

It took you two seconds to understand what he was implying.

"Inside," you breathed. "Please. Cum inside me."

He nodded before he started ramming his cock in your walls faster, moaning loudly through clenched teeth. You moaned with him and sank your head into your pillows, back arching as the tension in your body only grew more intense.

"Joshua, oh god—Joshua," you called, not knowing what else to say, feeling all sanity slipping out of your mind, coming undone under waves of pure bliss washing over you.

"Baby," he called to you. "Say it again."

You blinked weakly, his words bringing you back to reality.  

"I'm yours, Joshua," you breathed.

"You're mine," he replied with a raw tone. "I'm gonna make you mine, right baby? You want that? Want me to stuff your pretty pussy full of my cum?"

You moaned and nodded desperately, your walls squeezing him hard the moment you heard his words.

"Yes, oh god, yes please," you whimpered.

He cussed and moaned as he came inside you, pushing his hips against you sloppily.

"You're mine," he whispered, his eyes glazing over the sight of you cumming hard with him.

"Only yours, Joshua," you responded wildly.

He groaned, your name spilling from his plump lips, pushing his cum deep inside you with lazy thrusts and came to a stop with heavy breaths.

His head thrown back slightly, his eyelids fluttering shut, his mouth parted. He looked so unreal, ethereal even.

Oh god. What have you done?  

Joshua seemed to come down from his high when you shifted on your bed ever so slightly.

"What was all that?" he demanded in a tone that still denoted his confusion still. "The questions."

"I know nothing about you, Joshua," you explained shyly.

And yet, you told him you were his.

But he blinked slowly and started laughing, his cock was still buried inside your walls.

"Don't laugh at me," you pouted through your hurt ego, though he had no idea why you started quizzing him mid-coitus.

"You couldn't wait till we were done?" he asked and giggled again when you shook your head.

He leaned forward, placing his arms above your head on your pillows and pressed his chest against yours, his eyes looking at you fondly.

"What other questions do you have for me?" he asked.

"I-I have plenty," you admitted meekly.

"Is there a reason why you want to know now? Or can it wait?" he kept his eyes trained on you, you noticed, he was gathering every reaction you showed.

"It can wait," you nodded. "Why?"

"Because you asked me to fuck you all night and I'm in the middle of that," he booped your nose with one finger. "Can you keep your questions until I'm done?"

A sweet smile crept on his face when your core fluttered around him and you groaned in utter embarrassment.

"Is that a yes?" he laughed.

You groaned again and slapped his shoulder slightly.

"I'll get something to clean you up," he muttered with a smile still, pulling his hips from you.