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I'm proofreading a textbook and there was a picture of a giraffe awkwardly squatting to drink from a pond and it made me think of Yakumo trying to use a public water fountain that is not very tall
put him out of his misery already and cut him in half
i have sea creed rei so i peeled him for you and. he literally doesn’t have anything on underneath. he’s fully going commando. rei where is your undershirt
me: can someone peel this orange for me 🥺🍊
you: here u go lil buddy
me: thank u
(peel unravels to show empty space where the fruit should be)
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gasp! my yakuya!!!!!
yeah i like it (under certain conditions)
"position doesn't matter!!!! why are these devs so obsessed with tops vs bottoms!!!!!!!!!!"
-says the one whose enjoyment of kuya/yakumo depends on who's top/bottom
my fave yakuya is kuya receiving and yakumo giving
whether that's kuya power bottoming or yakumo successfully foxhandling kuya, i like those scenarios the most
the most emotional satisfaction i can get is from a kuya comeuppance 😃😃😃. however that happens?? i'm enjoying it.
what if kuya does his dom top thing with bottom yakumo? well. there's a bottom yakumo. so it's not like i'm plummeting into inconsolable grief.
but it IS what you'd expect from them? based on kuya's domineering personality? therefore not as Turntables. and not as fun :(
i'm talkin' bout fics here, as that is primarily where i've seen these two paired📝
it's THIS specific formula that just 🦷👌🤛🤜 gets me:
- kuya messes with yakumo
- wait, why is the baby yokai not crumpling like wet paper
- yoooooooo the radiant domestic boytoy finally shows his fangs
- kuya allows it to happen because it's interesting
- or kuya CLAIMS he allows it. even if it's not his choice. because of his control issues (as u know)
- a peculiar mix of pride and respect happening in kuya's peepaw brain while yakumo goes wild
- postnut clarity causes yakumo to quickly revert to his pathetic deferential self, which provides the audience with the comedy of contrast
- kuya is ultimately unharmed. or is he...? (someone get this old man into a hot bath)
kuya doesn';t know when to stop being a pain in the ass
and yakumo should be allowed to go bonkers feral
so why not put the bully [kuya] in his place, while also giving the sensitive nerd [yakumo] an outlet for all those restrained impulses???
old p0urple fox will be fine. u can't hurt him in any way that matters (much to his own dismay)
even if we travel allll the way back into yakumo's early intimacy rooms, where kuya said yaku was no fun to tease (since he takes everything so seriously)
and, as a result, yakumo is strangely immune to kuya's bullying...
we could achieve Peaceful Semi(or fully?)-Consensual Yakuya
kuya could still get yakumo into strange sexy situations without much fanfare LOL
he doesn't even have to piss yakumo off into Serpent Rage mode. he could approach Regular Yakumo, tell him to do something PREPOSTEROUS, and yaku would assume it was a training exercise from wise, foxy senpai.
yaku hesitation could be conquered by a couple of easy lies. and soon enough, kuya could do almost anything with the *gestures vaguely* obedient longbean
like those times where you decide to eat straight from a tub of ice cream with a pack of Oreos and a bottle of wine even though your supposed to be dieting but your work week sucked so much you need something to take the edge off
but it’s like noble politicians and such because like he’s not supposed to especially if they have like barely any essence but that’s what makes it so much better then usual
my boy DEFINITELY stresse eatss!!!!!
we've seen from his "daily schedule" that he alREADY bARELY sleeps. if he's gonna spend 80% of the day munching on something, he's bound to fall into the Garbage Snack Pit..!
especially since he doesn't have constant access to high quality, beloved foods (like! eiden!!)!
u gotta make do when aster's got u in a packed schedule of stressful work and work and work. and sometimes the "do" is the human equivalent of 3 loose peanuts you forgot about in ur pocket from a week ago
thus. a quick suck off a seedy noble, or 6. they congregate in useless groups so morv can get thru em pretty quickly
