#fake wizard

So, I need help simulating spells for my Kobold Rogue (read Wizard to the kobold).  I already have 4 “spells” made for him.  Fireball (a molotov cocktail), Stinking Cloud (a vial of skunk or badger musk), Acid Splash (a vial of acid), and Invisibility (basically a Dexterity (Stealth) check).

For those who are wondering, I’ve made a DM PC named Puddle who is a kobold rogue.  But he firmly believes he is a wizard and can cast spells (though his intelligence is only 10).  Since this is a character for me to play in my campaign (and will live longer than Spurt (see Critical Role)).  Here is what I have put together so far:

fireball A molotov cocktail. Deals 3 (1d6) fire damage on a failed DC 14 Dexterity save (10 + Dexterity modifier for DC), half as much on a success, and 2 (1d4) splash fire damage within 5 feet of target location on a failed DC 14 Dexterity save. The splash damage is negated if the save is successful. Damage does not increase with level progression.  (30 minutes to create)

stinking cloud A vial of skunk or badger musk tossed at a target. If the target is a creature, the spell is considered a ranged weapon attack, +4 to hit, range of 30 feet. On a hit, the target takes 1 point of piercing damage from the vial shattering, and is covered in skunk musk. The musk covers a 20-foot radius and those in the area must make a DC 16 Constitution saving throw or begin wretching, suffering disadvantage on all attacks and ability rolls. The person who is hit, must make this saving throw at the beginning of each of their turns or cannot take an action that turn. To remove the effect of the skunk musk, the creature must bathe twice a day for three days to remove the smell.Presdigitation can remove the smell as well. (3 hours to create)

acid splash A vial of acid is tossed at a target (see stinking cloud) and if hit, the target takes 1 piercing damage and acid damage as per the actual spell (without level progression). (30 minutes to create with a DC 15 Dexterity save every 10 minutes to avoid burning self with acid for 3 (1d6) acid damage.)

invisibility A stealth check. (no "components" needed.)

their glyph of warding is just a bear trap with poison on the ends

their fireball is just a can of mace and a lighter

to cast find familiar they hide behind a tree and pull a dove from their coat

they carry a notebook that has misspelled names of spells, it doesn't even tell you how to cast them, it's just a list