#exolsecretsanta2020

The week hasn’t been kind. You worked closing shift, again.  Despite having enough coworkers and an okay boss, somehow the worst shifts keep landing on your schedule. It’s not fun, it hasn’t been fun.  The commute home takes a while, you’re still not used to this part of the city. Missing your first connecter means waiting an extra thirty minutes for the next one. 

You find something to read on your phone, trying to distract yourself from the fact that Minseok hasn’t messaged back.   Your hearts shouldn’t ache but it does.  You miss him.

Technically it’s not a fight. You two don’t really fight, disagreements of opinion are bound to happen.  This was just one of those times.  He’s been working hard, managing his parent’s cafe while attending law school. You’re busy too, the end of school and transition into working even more hasn’t been fun.  You’re both a bit stretched and, it’s okay. Small disagreements happen.

You shouldn’t worry, really, you try not to.

But your mind keeps tickling with the worst case scenario and it almost makes you miss your next connecting bus. Almost.

You can take back some of the words you said, the weekend is coming. After rest and time to reflect on the disagreement, you will apologize for your part. Minseok will apologize for his.  He always seems so calm and cool when things get tense…you’re sure he’s already thinking of his part in this.  Maybe it’s because he’s a lawyer but his uncanny ability to be fair and own when he’s wrong is something you admire about him. And his neat and tidy habits. 

Ugh, no! You remember the dishes from the last two days. Those will get done tonight! You will do them!  Put on some motivational music and get to it.  The weekend is coming, you can take a break, Minseok and you will talk, it will be ok. 

It’s dark, so dark you pull your red coat closer to yourself, familiar alleys turn scary without light. You make it up to your apartment safely, briefly distracted by how pretty the city looks at night as you exit the elevator and start to unlock the door to your apartment.

What hits you first is the scent of cinnamon, then chocolate.  Your apartment has only one lamp on, your arms habitually reach for the light switch but before you can turn it on, a bunch of string lights make the room glow bright.  It’s so beautiful. Everything is softened.

You hear a match being struck, two candles on your tiny table are lit and Minseok’s smiling face comes to view. He’s dressed in a white dresshirt and black slacks. He folds one of your small towels on his arm and bows slightly like a waiter. “Madam your table.” He gestures to your seat. “Ah! After you wash your hands.”

It should be illegal how quickly he makes you smile. 

🕯️

Minseok doesn’t need a reason. He decided on the day he saw you, he’ll always make you smile.  The hardest part for him was waiting, if you had asked him for the world on the first date, he would have all the treaties drafted and ready for you.  If you asked to never be alone on the third date, he’d always be by your side, buy the apartment next door and never use it.  

It’s a bit silly, but he fell at first site.  Just that one glance at the cafe was enough.  Minseok didn’t think it was possible, he takes himself for a practical person. He has lots of responsibility on his shoulders, the cafe, his law degree, his sibling, his cat.  And yet, he happened to be working and take out one order to your table and he was smitten.  The beautiful patron in a lovely red coat, how he wished he had the courage then to ask for your number but no, he didn’t want to intrude.  Kept thinking about you for weeks before running into you at a perfume shop.

Both of you shopping for holiday gifts, he watched you put down a scent you liked in favor of getting the gifts you came for.  A small way, he would realize later on, how you take care of those around you with such grace. Putting yourself aside far too much for his liking. Minseok scooped up that perfume sent, got it packaged and rushed after you.  Your shocked face, the smile and surprise. A complete stranger buying you such an expensive Jo Malone perfume just to see you smile?

Minseok didn’t even have the words to describe how happy he feels when he see’s you smile.

He didn’t need a reason then, he doesn’t need one now. He’s so sure he wants you baby. Always, always, please always always stay with him.

You two didn’t have a big fight, but the argument hurt. Both of you. He’s so sorry, he knows he can be better, he will do better. You two have to carry on, he doesn’t want to imagine a future without you. 

A part of him promised forever when he saw you, and he will promise you right this minute if you ask. You’re his angel.

And today isn’t special, it’s not an anniversary.  But he’s celebrating because it reminds him of the day you two met, the day his life changed forever. He found someone he could love, truly, from the bottom of his heart. And maybe it’s the late nights and studying that’s making him sentimental but gosh, he really had gone a whole two weeks without a proper date night. And while his schedule may not allow for a true date this month, he can do this, he can at least give you this.

🕯️

You are toeing out of your shoes and put down your things, rush to wash your hands and freshen up your look. This is an unexpected treat. What is today? Doesn’t he have mock trails? Doesn’t he have a shift at the cafe? How is he here?  When did he have time to put up all these lights? Where did he find such a cute bear made from roses?

Once you sit down, the thoughts quiet down.  He brings over two plates of his best attempt at the restaurant dish you like best. He even copied how they plate it! The smile on your face doesn’t flatter, he goes to grab two other plates, cookies and settles them to the side.  Pours sparkling cider into both of your cups and raises his glass. “To your smile!”

It makes you both giggle and the clink of the glasses is nice, Minseok being here is nice, the apartment looks warm and soft in the tiny lights.   He eagerly waits for you to dig in and you wanted to act like it’s the worst thing you’ve eaten but it tastes so darn good.  Gosh!  He sighs relieved and starts to eat his own meal as well. It’s quiet for a little while before your eyes fall to the book on your coffee table in the distance, it brings back the memory of when you slammed it down.  The…argument. You two should talk.

“I’m sorry Minseok, I said hurtful things.” You start.

He moves his hand to the top of the table, asking for yours and he holds it close. “I am too, I didn’t…mean it. With trying to juggle everything and realizing I wasn’t prioritizing us it…it hurt. You were right though.”

“I know you care though, and you have been trying.”

“And you’re way too kind to me.” He sighs, squeezes your hand close.  Dinner becomes a bit more of a serious talk than expected.  It was needed, this heart to heart, Minseok’s been carrying the burden of everyone’s expectations and silly him. When did he need to be superman for you? 

Once you two clean up dinner, he pulls up your favorite movie and you two sit together on the couch, your head on his shoulder, his hand playing with yours. This is your favorite treat, his presence.  “We’re okay?” He asks, still timid, still unsure.  Like you wouldn’t fight the entire universe for him.

“Of course.”  He relaxes, “but,” his eyes instantly dart to you consumed with worry, “If you eat my share of the cookies we may not be.”  His hearty laugh is honestly the best sound. It takes away the entire misery of working closing shift all week. You feel your hear full, your skin cleared and wow, maybe this is close to the superpowers soulmates have.  Maybe. 

“I wouldn’t imagine it.” Minseok settles into the sofa, ready to quote this movie back to you, being dramatic at the parts that mark you tense, to lighten the mood. He has an early morning, you know this, he knows this.  But for now, time feels slow.  Your apartment full glowing with happiness, filled with Minseok’s cologne, cookies and his voice. He’s the perfect cuddler, another thing to add to the unfair list.  The movie starts to fade as your eyes grow heavy, he’s humming a melody quietly into your ears, maybe pressing tiny kisses to the back of your head and neck. Gentle and soft, you’re falling deeper and deeper into ease.  

Your eye’s aren’t going to stay open for much longer. He makes everything cosy, working closing shift long forgotten. Movie long forgotten.  “You make me so happy.” He confesses, thinking you’re asleep. You feel yourself blush and it’s really unfair. 

He’s an angel.

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