#existentialmalaises

Sabrina

Nick

Harvey

Zelda

Lilith

Rosalind

Ambrose

Prudence

Agatha

Hilda

Father Blackwood

Lucifer

Have you ever read a 6/11 fic?

Have I ever read a Roz/Father Blackwood fic? No, and I have no desire to :’) what a way to start off this questionnaire!

What would happen if 12 got 8 pregnant?

What if Lucifer got Prudence pregnant. You should see my face right now. Nope, not answering that. That would be a very different show.

Can you read fics about 9/3?

Hmmm, I’ve never read Agatha/Harvey but I’m not opposed to it. We don’t know all that much about Agatha but maybe he’d be good for her!

Would 2 and 6 make a good couple?

Nick/Roz? Honestly, I see the vision. I’d read that. She has enough spark to intrigue him while being a bit steadier and nicer than Sabrina. He has that sad bad boy thing going on and I don’t think she’d be all that charmed by it, but maybe if she got to see him in a different light? I’m here for it!

5/9 or 5/10?

Lilith/Agatha or Lilith/Hilda… Okay you know what, I think Lilith/Hilda would be genuinely hilarious. Hilda has some serious darker depths and I think she could keep up with Lilith. A real opposites attract. Wouldn’t last, but wouldn’t it be fun to see the journey?

What would happen if 7 walked in on 1 and 12 making out?

What if Ambrose walked in on Sabrina and Lucifer? He’d hopefully perform an exorcism.

Make a summary for a 3/10 fic.

Goodness. Okay.

Ten years after Harvey left Greendale, a mysterious and disconcerting message has him returning to his hometown. He encounters a ghost town with only one light in the dark night—the Spellman house. And his ex-girlfriend’s aunt Hilda, who seems convinced Greendale is dying and Harvey is the only one who can save it. Together, they attempt to solve the mystery of what happened to Greendale, but more lurks outside the house than just the ghosts of their past…

Is there anything such as 1/8 fluff?

I’m sure there’s Sabrina/Prudence fluff out there but I’ll be honest, that doesn’t seem like the appeal of a pairing like that. I’d like to see some enemies-to-lovers, messy angst.

Suggest a title for a 7/12 hurt/comfort fic.

Ambrose/Lucifer? Lol. Okay. Well, the song I was listening to when I got to this question was a cover of Franz Ferdinand’s Take Me Out by Young Summer. It’s not giving hurt/comfort vibes but maybe in their own way it could be? So there, a line from the song as a title: "A Shot Away From You". Nicely ambiguous and eerie.

What might 10 scream out in a moment of passion?

Hilda would absolutely scream out “oh dear” or something.

If you wrote a 1/6/7 fic, what would the warnings be?

Sabrina/Rosalind/Ambrose. Aside from the ‘incest’ warning I think this would be quite wholesome actually!

When was the last time you read a fic about 5?

I’m not sure I’ve read a Lilith fic before, I usually stuck to fic about the kids. Wouldn’t be opposed, I could be here for Lilith/Zelda for example.

“Sabrina and Agatha are in a happy relationship until Agatha suddenly runs off with Zelda. Sabrina, brokenhearted, has a one night stand with Father Blackwood and a brief, unhappy affair with Lucifer, then follows the wise advice of Lilith and finds true love with Harvey.” What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.

I love that this like… almost makes sense? Sabrina/Harvey as endgame cracked me up. I would name this fic “long story short” after the Taylor Swift song. I wouldn’t make anyone write or read it though.

How would you feel if 7/8 were canon?

Don’t have to imagine, Ambrose/Prudence remains iconic. Probably ended up being one of my favorite relationships on the show.

Do you think 9 is hot?

I think Agatha is hot, yeah. Apparently the actress is still dating Tommy Martinez which is a gorgeous couple if I’ve ever seen one.

What kind of plot would you use if you wanted 6 to deflower 8?

What if Roz wanted to deflower Prudence? Seems… improbable lol. Maybe Roz could be the first person Prudence has sex with where she actually has feelings? I think Roz would be very respectful and Prudence would be a little standoffish but then melt. Of course there’d be some world-ending drama that would force them to work together, which would get them talking and Roz would see past Prudence’s prickly shell.

If you wrote a songfic about 2, what song would you choose?

Looked up my Nick playlist for this. I’ll go with something angsty set during season 2 and say Julien Baker’s Shadowboxing: “When you watch me throwing punches at the devil / It just looks like I’m fighting with me.”

What would be a good pick-up line for 9 to use on 10?

A pick-up line for Agatha to use on Hilda... Hilda’s really getting around here. Hm, I think Agatha wouldn’t be cheesy with her pick-up lines, she’d just put on a sexy little dress, show up at Hilda’s door and be like “I know you want me”. And that’d be that.

What is 3's super-secret kink?

I think Harvey would have a praise kink. Is that super-secret? Wait, no, okay, alternatively I think he’d be into cuckolding. Has anyone written that fic? They should. I’m imagining a Harvey/Sabrina/Nick AU for Sara Cate’s Give Me More and it sounds amazing in my head.

Would 11 shag 9, drunk or sober?

Father Blackwood and Agatha—yes, but it would be a ploy of Agatha’s to bring down Blackwood and it would work.

If 4 and 7 got together, who tops?

Zelda would top Ambrose. Tell me I’m wrong.