Beelzemon, does a gun spin: Groovy.

(Nica snickers)

Now, don't play with that. Only I could do that.

Holds the knife’s handle between her two hands, inspecting the object close to her face.

“What is it though? It looks kinda pretty.”

I wrote this during the holiday season 2010 and 2011 whenever an idea struck me, and decided to collect it all together, listing them by the date they were written.

December 21, 2010

‘Twas four nights before Christmas, and round the whole world, not a creature was stirring, except one weird teenage girl. She was dreaming that sugar-plums were trying to eat her, and that their boss was her evil history teacher.

December 26, 2010

'Twas the night after christmas, and thanks to one girl, the planet was safe. Yes, she saved the world. The sugar-plum zombies were finally slain, and she could finally have a good night's sleep again.

December 27, 2010

'Twas two nights past Christmas, and half the world was a-bed, no sugar-plum zombies near anyone's head. The heroine's vorpal sword lay pure and pristine in the case where she'd placed it after wiping it clean.

December 23, 2011

'Twas three nights before Christmas, and that same teenaged girl was reminiscing about how she'd saved the whole world. She glanced at her vorpal blade, pristine on its shelf, and remembered the thrill of defending herself, from sugarplum zombies who'd attack from the brush, and that beheading feeling, oh man, WHAT A RUSH! With a "Take that!" and then a "How's your mother?!" she'd decapitate one and then go after another.

December 24, 2011

(Written the previous night, but was unable to post until that night)

'Twas two nights until Christmas, and that girl's reminiscing about the point in the battle where her brother went missing. He'd gone ahead to scout the source of "that darn noise." Those sugarplum zombies used his parts for toys. They'd made his ribcage into a small xylophone, and one small zombie girl gave that thing a home. Because her brother's demise was so frightfully gory, she couldn't bear teling their parents the whole story.

December 24, 2011

'Twas the night before Christmas, and she was starting to worry. The people in town seemed to be in a hurry. They were all running away from the old shut-down mill, so she unpacked her blade and pepared for a thrill. She remembered how all this had started last time: A strange dream had led her to a rift in Space-Time. She suspected that the rift had somehow returned, so she tried to remember all that she had learned: How to kill a sugarplum zombie with ease (The trick? Why, to shoot for the knees); Never go into a battle alone (she hoped that that weird guy had found his way home); Always keep a chainsaw fueled-up and handy; to mop up spilled blood, keep a bag of clean sand(y).

December 25, 2011

Yes, the rift was back, of this she was certain. Now, she just had to go through the dimensional curtain. She hoped there were more battles for her to fight, and was happy to see a sickly yellow light. She stepped through the tear in Space and came out the back, and right then, the Sugarplum zombies attacked. She unpacked her chainsaw and said one word: "Groovy." (Hey, of course she loves those Evil Dead movies!) Then the slaughter commenced, and she yelled out of joy. It was just like when Santa would bring her a toy. She was slashing and sawing and was causing great pains (or at least would if Sugarplum zombies had brains.) Then, before she knew it, the battle was over. "Aw, man," she complained, "I thought there were more here." Their bodies littered the ground all around her, and now she was wondering just how they had found her.

December 25, 2011

'Twas the day known as Christmas, with her mission ongoing, but right now it's was starting to get a bit boring. She'd slaughtered thirteen groups of zombies today, and wondered when the next group would want to "play." She'd seen some strange creatures that looked like Okapi, and they had dripped acid that glowed and smelled nasty. Also, their heads were easy to chainsaw, but their blood stained her blouse, which made her cry "Awww..." She'll have to launder that when this was all over, but "Wait, is that the sound of a bulldozer?!" She looked up, and sure 'nuff, that's what it was. A zombie was driving it, his head full of fuzz. She ran towards the hulking metal thing, then jumped, while at the same time, her shotgun she pumped. She took her time aiming while still in mid-air, and blew his head off in a way no one could repair. She saw on his neck-stump a dangling pendant. "My word," she murmured, "this is quite resplendent. I'll bet that this thing has something to do with these zombie attacks, and last years' ones, too!" She took out her big book of magical things, and found it under the heading "Groding's." It seems this pendant can affect others' perception, which is why she had thought it so worth mention. Now that she held it, it seemed rather plain, and she now knew the way that it had tricked her brain.

December 26, 2011