#evermortis

to be visited by an adeptus is surprising enough, moreso when it’s the lonesome yaksha who claimed “ lantern rite is meaningless ” and refused to come to the harbour on the ceremonial night of his own festival.

( is lantern rite about xiao? that depends on who you ask. to xingqiu, he finds it endearing and fitting: remove the demons and rain some love on him — there you have it, the xiao lantern festival. )

nonetheless, xingqiu gets it. if you were away from the crowd for eons, you would be anxious to get close too.

what is more surprising than xiao showing up, is that he shows up with a request, something obviously only the bestselling writer — only in inazuma! — chenqiu can pull off.

“ you want me to write you a story? ” xingqiu blinks once, then twice, still baffled by the yaksha’s request. for a few seconds, all he can do is stare — the ever reclusive xiao has decided this was such an important matter that he personally came by liyue to seek his pen.

xiao never asks for help, let alone favours. naturally, this must be significant. after a year of dedicated offerings, xingqiu seems to have finally softened the adeptus’s shell — this progress leaves xingqiu giddy inside, and he could not have said yes any faster.

“ what kind of story? who is the main character? do you want to be the main character? how many chapters? ” overjoyed by his first ever commission — not to mention for someone he absolutely adores — xingqiu launches into a series of questions. he digs through his drawers at the same time, grabbing his notebook and starts to scribbling like a mad man.

though already used to the human’s antics, xiao is still amused by xingqiu’s display of passion and commitment. however, the lightness on his features is short lived. 

 “ not a long one, ” he elaborates after a moment of thought, eyes narrowing solemnly. “ maybe not even a story. just a scene or two... ” clasping a hand over his mouth, the adeptus falls silent once more.

“ what kind of scenes? ” xingqiu glances up, curiosity simmering in his eyes like molten gold before being made into mora.

for a long while, xiao remains seated quiet. xingqiu knows better than to rush him, so he simply sits there and waits, no matter how impatient he is feeling inside.

then, after a small eternity, xiao speaks again.

“ several hundred years ago, a girl lost her life because of me, ” there is a sudden pause, followed by a painful and gutting confession, “ i killed her. ” 

the sudden reveal hits xingqiu like a rock, yet xiao leaves no room for any response.

“ my mistake has costed her everything — her life, her family, her memories. ” xiao reaches for the cup of tea, gloved hands carefully tracing the round edges. “ i cannot remake what is lost... but i can give her something similar. cloud retainer has a soft spot for children. i can convince her to create a domain with the girl’s family there— ” xiao pauses again, wincing sharply. “ —this is the only way i can repay my sins. ”

xiao has lived for thousands of years, and most of his existence was full of blood and tears — xingqiu knows that. however, hearing the yaksha admit his faults in such a vulnerable tone is no less heartbreaking.

the truth sets in xingqiu’s throat like a hard-to-swallow pill, and he turns around to fiddle with his books. he stacks them up one by one as to collect his thoughts, but nothing seems to clear his head.

“ what are you saying? are you asking me to make up a story for her? ” 

xingqiu waits for a moment but xiao doesn’t respond. biting on his lip, he presses on.

“ i don’t want to lie to her. do you really think this is a good idea? ”

“ when has mortals ever minded a beautiful lie? ” xiao raises a question, tone so calm yet somehow insulting. this is the gap between adepti and men. “ all the tales you read, they are nonetheless mesmerising despite being fantasy. ”

“ that is not the same, ” xingqiu retorts sharply. “ you don’t even know if she ever had one. ”

xingqiu has a point too. clenching his jaw, xiao mutters lowly, “ she must have had one. even if she did not, we are going to give her one. ”

for the first time, xingqiu realised how stubborn xiao could be. to be honest, xingqiu isn’t sure what exactly convinced him — was it xiao’s persistence? or the suffocating guilt in his tone? his tightly held fists? or the way he said ‘ we ’? — maybe he simply hates rejecting someone who has never asked anyone for anything in his life.