Jonathan sims is like. I don't think I've ever loved anyone in my life. I've loved everyone I've ever met and it eats me alive. None of this is my fault how DARE you be even a little mad at me. All of this is my fault how are you even looking me in the eye. Nobody cares about me and I don't blame them. I will drop everyone to save the people that hurt me, even at the cost of my own life. I will never forgive them. I've never truly connected with anyone in my life. These people who I barely even know made such a deep impact on me I will kill a woman with her face to avenge her and steal his autonomy to save him. I never wanted to hurt anyone. I want to hurt people so badly. This is a woman I care about deeply, and I never forgave her, and never plan to. I will advocate for her friend to kill her, and I will grieve her once she's gone. I can't stop being open. I've never been open about my emotions in my entire life. I never want to be around anyone. I'm so tired of being alone. I don't think I've ever loved anyone. How do you know if you love someone? Is it just caring about someone? What defines love? Am I doing it wrong? Is there something wrong with me? Elias, am I still human? Was I ever human? I deserve how people treat me. I hate them for it. I shouldn't hate them for it, I can't even blame them. But I do. I do. I want to destroy everything. I just want things to be okay. I want to be loved and accepted and I will never believe anyone who tells me they do. I wish I was dead. I never want to die. I deserve to die. I'm supposed to be dead. I don't want to die. But I do . But I don't. Have I ever cared about anyone but myself? Would I even know? If I died, would anything bad happen? Or would it just be sad? If I died, how many people would be relieved? If I died, and nobody missed me, could I forgive them for that? Have I ever forgave anyone? Have I ever gotten over anything? Have I ever stopped being angry? Did I ever move on? Will I ever move on? What am I even moving on from? Did any of it even matter? I don't think I've ever loved someone. I think I was supposed to die. I think everyone would be better off for it. I don't want to die.
