#ep 97

'Maybe you and I are both damned, but we can choose to do something and leave it better than it was before.' This moment in ep 97 lives rent free in my mind forever, and I've been wanting to draw it ever since I first watched it live. I have so many feelings about these two, and their relationship over the course of the campaign (and beyond) means so much to me. While not yet fulfilled or entirely convinced of his own worth, at this point in the story, Caleb knows he’s on the right path. That alone is progress enough, but that he uses his own experiences to help another escape those same chains of guilt says such a lot for his development. When he tells Essek that his ‘venom’ was learned, he’s also talking about himself and his own history of being manipulated and gaslit, with the implication being that it can be un-learned just as efficiently. Essek describes himself as selfish and as a coward, forever putting his own wants and desires first, yet over the course of his journey with the Nein we see his priorities change drastically. Having friends gives him people to care about, something he’s never had before, and it changes his outlook on life completely.

I think it says so much about the other characters too, that they befriended this person they barely knew, and when he was revealed to have done such terrible things, their first reaction was to give him comfort and an opportunity to atone. Jester held his hand while he confessed, and afterwards, while they didn’t immediately forgive him, they saw the good in him and wanted him to be better, which ultimately feels like what the entire campaign was about, leaving places (and people) better than they found them.

Okano Hitoshi (30)

Koutarou's Attending Physician