#entry 1

Gimmick Name: @The-new-official-gimmicktionary

Syllables: The New O•fic•ial gim•mick•tio•nar•y

Phonetics: Thuh Noo Uh-Fish-uhl Gihm-Mik-shuh-nare-ee

Origin of Name:

"The" comes from the proto-germanic word "sa", which means "that." In old english it was then split into 10 different gendered terms which then converged in middle english to make the word "þe" as words were simplified. It at one point was referred to as "Ye" in writing as early printers and handwriting styles used "þ" to make the "th" noise, which looked similar to "Y" at the time.

Kind of Gimmick: Official Blog

I don't consider myself a real person. I like the feeling of touching my fingertips, walking, breathing air. Yet I don't see myself as anything more than a fleeting memory. I am a fish who dwells into the web space, silent.

For as long as I can remember, I regretted being alive. Because being alive meant being a passerby in a world that is so everchanging for someone who can't keep up. I can't swim this fast. In fact, I may not be able to swim at all. I just float, complete the tasks I need to complete, in order to be seen as an adult.

As I begin to post my journal entries here, I realise that many of you will not even know what a Nephilim is. Allow me to explain.

Many years ago, there came angels. We called them Watchers, because they used to watch over us. Amongst them was their leader, Samyaza. They procreated with human women, and thus, we were born.

We have both angel and human blood in our veins. Biologically, we are very similar to humans, though we are much bigger, tougher and stronger than any of them combined would be. We could easily crush a small human neighbourhood. We also do not struggle as much to look at angels.

Some of us considered the Watchers to be our gods, but most of us were Christian and saw the Father as the true god. Many still considered the Watchers to be extremely important figures, though. Especially Samyaza. To many, he was essentially some sort of demigod. I personally view him as my creator. Not in a reverent way, but in a logical way. If not for him, I would not exist. Whether my existence is a good thing is another question.

I digress.

The early Nephilim were trained by some of Watchers. However, they all suddenly disappeared one day with no trace. None of us could find them. The humans living with us at the time refused to give us resources to live. With no other option, we had to turn to violence. Many records of us depict us as being lawless savages. Cannibals who only seek bloodshed. Wicked trolls. Monsters. We were completely dehumanised by them. Thus, we hesitate to call ourselves ‘human’ in any way. After all, why would we associate ourselves with those who hurt us.

Then, there was the civil war. We do not really know why it happened, but one day, the violence turned inwards and we were all at each other’s throats. Hundreds upon thousands died. But this did not kill us. I have come to suspect that this war was a punishment given from God for our lawlessness, as I cannot think of any other reason we would enter needless fighting. If that was the case, then why? We were dealt poor cards, and then punished for playing with those cards by the one who dealt them to us?

I am going off track. The civil war did not kill us. A selection of us - at least 15 - declared peace and opted to stop fighting. Instead, we built up our own civilisation from the remains of human civilisations we were forced to capture. We had a playground, a school, houses. A community.

And then that community was ripped from under my feet.

I will not elaborate on that day yet. Perhaps next time. But I will indulge you on what that life was like, for I actually lived it.

See, the history I told you up until the end of the civil war I did not live through. I was only brought to this world 36 years ago. This is what I learnt from the history classes at school, save for the spiels of Gadreel. This teacher was ancient, see. Old enough to have been able to actually see a Watcher. Our school was very small, by the way. Only one class, and three teachers. I went with all of my siblings and cousins.

I shall now introduce my family.

Vered. I am quite dear to her. She always begs to go hunting with me, but alas, she was always too young. It is from her that I got the idea of journaling from, though she often used her journals to talk about her love for Samyaza. I always questioned why she idolised someone she didn’t even know so much, but I never confronted her about it. Live and let live, I say.

Chaya. She’s very mischievous, although I’ve never minded it. She spices up otherwise plain days. She also had interest in the angels, though she cared more for the archangels Michael and Gabriel than she did for the Watchers. I wish I could tell her…

Neomah and Nediva. They were latecomers to our settlement. Apparently, they had escaped during the civil war to hide in a cave. The same one I later resided in. I wonder if they would have been the ones in my position in another universe.

And Tzvi. I remember very little about him, unfortunately. I wish I could tell you something besides typical baby matters like changing diapers, but I really cannot.

Not to forget Ma and Pa, of course. They managed to support all of us for so long and helped to improve the neighbourhood to make it pleasant for all of us.

How time flies.

I believe this is as much backstory as you will require about the Nephilim. If other information becomes relevant, I shall write about it in future entries.

This was my. first, or second week in this world. I don't understand it very well yet. I met a very nice boy, he took me to his house and helped me get clean. He said i can borrow his old computer for entertainment. He's very nice and pretty, pleasing to look at.

His house wasn't the cutest, but i liked the fact that he put sunflowers everywhere. That was cute. He took me to his shower and helped me take a proper bath. I felt uncomfortable to undress in front of him, but he was nice enough to not comment on anything.

I felt better after that.

Then, he made dinner for us. I wonder why he's taking so much care of me, I'm not a real angel, despite not living in this world. I don't know why he wants me to be good so much.

It was 12 pm and he told me we should sleep, and i complied, although i wasn't feeling sleepy. He said we could share the bed if i didn't like sleeping on the couch. I didn't like sleeping on the couch.

So, we slept in the same bed. I slept in the same bed as the pretty boy. That was very awkward. While he was sleeping, i was still awake, and he reached out to me and hugged me lightly, since he was still sleeping. I didn't move an inch. Like when a cat lays on you. I then finally slept.