#entity talks

Hermit: Docm77

This was originally supposed to be a fusion prompt from hermitcraftfusions of Doc and BadTimesWithScar, but I think it’s ended up just being Doc.

Since I saw the Amazing Digital Circus finale in the cinema on the 4th and went to see the Backrooms movie a week ago, I've been thinking about the parallels and similarities in Jax's and Clark's storylines, the main common trait being the refusal to change and pushing people away. In this post I will attempt to put some of these thoughts into words and explore this topic a little. You're very welcome to reply with your own thoughts and observations!

Let's begin with Clark. Backrooms portrays Clark as a character diametrically opposed to his therapist Mary. In his mental struggles Clark is clearly the perpetrator and abuser, while Mary is the victim in hers. The movie follows both characters in their struggle with being trapped in their own dysfunctional patterns, which is symbolically manifested by the backrooms, the difference being that Clark's storyline ends in him realizing and acccepting that he doesn't actually want to change and that he would rather cling to his grudge and victim mentality (blaming every bad thing on others and refusal to take accountability), as demonstrated by the scene where he and Mary re-enact his argument with his wife. In contrast to that Mary refuses to let herself be caged by her own destructive patterns and fights to get out.

Now onto Jax. I will be using they/them pronouns for Jax because I like to leave the final interpretation of Jax's character up to the reader (I personally like to engage with both the interpretation of Jax as transfem (and personally see it as canon) as well as all other variotions and interpretations like femboy Jax, transmasc Jax and even cis Jax if I'm feeling adventurous (it's so fun to have multishipper mentality but for interpretations). Anyway, Jax shares this trait of avoiding accountability with Clark, though in a fairly different way. They do their best to convince themselves that their actions don't matter because they're living in a digital world. Jax struggles with taking accountability so hard because for that to happen they would need to first let go of the very beliefs that keep their whole identity afloat and keep them functional and protected from potential ridicule and harm, while also shielding them from their crushing feelings of guilt and worthlessness that stem from their interpersonal trauma (their mother and Ribbit). This would simply be too destabilizing and enough to push them to abstraction. Instead Jax chooses to keep masking and pushing everyone away.

This is the same thing that Clark ends up doing, as he himself states in the beginning of the movie: "In the end, I end up alone". He alienates the people that get close to him by always complaining, blaming everybody /-thing for his bad acts (=refusing to take accountability) and never changing. In the end Clark comes to an acceptance of the fact that he does not actually want to change. 

A similar thing happens to Jax: while a bit more sympathetic, they still choose to continue to alienate anyone who gets close to them, as they believe that this way they're both protecting the others and themselves. In a frustrating and tragic development the audience watches Jax as they double down on pushing everyone away. It's not an entirely malicious or fully intentional act (not that it would excuse any of it!), it's the consequence of Jax taking away the wrong lessons from their past experiences: That Jax is inherently dangerous to be around and that letting people see the real Jax is painful. So the only logical thing for them to do is to fully isolate from any real relationship (serves their anxiety, self-punishing tendencies due to guilt, self-protection). In a tragic "misunderstanding" this is the very behavior that harms Jax and the people around them. In their and Pomni's last conversation Jax, like Clark, finally faces the reality of their actions and is confronted with the painful realization that it did not have to be that way. Their arc is focused on being proven wrong, but realizing it too late, because they were only able to let their mask fall when they felt like they had nothing left to lose.