#emralan

Um, I’m excited about Emralan because they’re EVERYTHING, and you are well aware of that :P

Seriously though, Emma’s relationship with Tamralan is an opportunity for her to be soft with someone who isn’t Lux, but not pressured into being so soft it becomes out of character for her.  And since it’s not pushing her boundaries in ways that are going to make her withdraw, she’s embracing it, being soft with him in a way that she’s comfortable with and is still her, loving and being loved in a way that isn’t scary.  Tam is so patient and good, and being with him lets her see that being her and being in love are not mutually exclusive, and she doesn’t have to be someone she’s not to feel things she feels.  I love thinking about them together because of that tender kindness, and I can’t help but smile when I do.

I feel like we made Thelio to kind of offset all the fluff from Emralan and satisfy our goblin brains, haha.  It IS sweet, though, the way they both come to accept that things they’d thought about themselves and others’ perception of them aren’t really as infallibly spot on as they thought.  Túlio learns that people can find him intrinsically interesting, without pretending of any kind, and that he can fuck up royally and still be worth loving.  Plus, they just have fun together and I really love that, as simplistic as it sounds?  They laugh, they joke, they goof off and fool around and give each other something to genuinely enjoy about life and I am just over here like... “good for them.”

Runaren is kind of like Emralan in that it’s a lot of understanding and patience, but it’s also interesting to think about because there aren’t grand gestures and flowery dialogue with them; it’s practically all body language so it’s a challenge to think of how they’ll get their feelings across without much talking, just looks and touches.  It’s all they need though, and it makes them happy. :)

I wouldn’t expect anything else from you ;)

[RE: send me a ship and I will]

As is tradition, I managed to entirely miss oc kiss week, but since I subscribe to the philosophy of I Do What I Want, have a snippet of perpetually insufferable morning person Emma Sparrow not being quite so keen on letting Tamralan (belongs to the loveliest @saphylee) likewise wake up late.  

_______

The sun crept above the peaks of the Frostbacks at the same time throughout Skyhold, and Emma was well aware.  Nevertheless, despite having watched the sky gradually lighten for hours already, when she did so from the Inquisitor’s quarters it always felt like she was the last to know.  As she brushed her fingers across the arm draped over her ribs, she wondered if perhaps that was why Tamralan made such an oddly specific request: 

Wake me when you can see the sun, and not a moment before.    

She felt for his hand beneath the corner of blanket that extended from the mountain of them behind her, and turned her head as far as she could to address the man huddled beneath them.  

“Tamralan.”  Her hand wrapped tightly around his, and she nudged him gently with her shoulder.  “The sun has risen.”

As though she would have expected him to do anything else, Tamralan drew in a sharp breath, tightening his arm around her before letting it out again as a long, beleaguered sigh.

“Nnnng...no.”

Emma smiled, and nudged him again.

“Tam.”

Only a groan this time.  Wrestling herself out from under his arm, she rolled over towards him and lifted the blanket away from his face.  His lips and nose twitched with the colder air, and she let herself just watch him for a moment.  She always did, just took in the fragile peace sleep left on his face before inevitably positioning herself so as to no longer block the light through the windows.  

The soft wrinkles at the corners of his eyes tensed, and they fluttered open briefly before more groans, and a groggy, feeble attempt to hold on to sleep and retreat behind the safety of the blankets again.  

“You said the same thing yesterday.”

Tamralan’s dark eyes opened again, but only just. Just enough to be able to see her, to map out where to send his arms to wrap her up and pull her closer, and she didn’t resist. As if she ever could. His eyes fell shut again a moment later, and his crooked smirk coalesced in their wake as he released a calm sigh into her hair.

She didn’t need to listen to know what he would say next, but she liked hearing his voice anyway.

“Tomorrow.”

“You said that yesterday, too.”

His smirk grew, wide the way a clever trickster does when finally given a chance to ploy their grand scheme.

“Tell you what.  Just...let me sleep, and I swear I won’t say it again tomorrow.”

Emma shook her head against the pillow, his wistful smile infectious. He’d said that yesterday, too.

Not without further groans of protest, she raised herself onto her elbow and brusquely folded the blankets over down to his shoulders, and blocked him from immediately pulling it back by placing her other arm in the way, ostensibly to smooth hair from in front of his face.

“I have already told you, I am not your-“

“Excuse to sleep in however long I want, I know. I know.”  One final huff and his eyes fluttered open again. Somehow, he managed to grin and pout at the same time. She could never quite get it right herself, but he always gave her at least the tiniest chuckle when she tried.

“You’re so cruel, you know that?” he whined, rolling onto his back. She might have mistaken it for a sincere complaint, had he not let the grin take over his entire face a moment later before reaching out to poke the tip of her nose.

“For someone so insistent I get out of bed right away in the morning, you are awfully warm and cozy.” His hand came to rest over hers, the one cruelly keeping his hair from giving him some minuscule reprieve from the equally cruel sun, and pulled it in front of him to plant a small kiss on her knuckles. “It would be easier if you’d stop that.”

He did that to her, she supposed, the smile unconsciously stretching across her own face, and the idea that against her better judgment, perhaps another hour or two of peace with him wouldn’t be so bad.

Emma leaned down and pressed her lips to his forehead before sinking back into the bed, and guiding the arm he’d snaked under her head up around her back as she settled against him.

YES :’)

Let’s have...Tam giving Emma’s near eidetic memory a little test.

Tamralan: Hmm. My birthday?

Emma: 4th of Bloomingtide. 9:01 Dragon.

T: Of course, that’s an easy one. What about...my daughter’s birthday?

E: 20th of Justinian. 9:20 Dragon.

T: How...did you know that??

E: You mentioned it to my father when asking if he could get more of the honey cakes he’d had for Eynon. And Lux is quite proud of the gift he’s gotten for her.

T: ...of course he is. Right, let’s try...my mother’s name?

E: Lynmyath. And your father was Mihrehn.

T: I...couldn’t have told you that more than once, in passing, at best. *smirks* And my brother?

E: You do not have a brother. *narrows her eyes* Are you trying to trick me, Tamralan?

T: :) Wouldn’t dream of it. When and where we first met?

E: 28th of Kingsway. 9:29 Dragon. At my father’s house in Starkhaven. He was thrilled to be working with you, and he had me fetch you a bag of his best Honeysweet apples as a special treat. That was also the first time I gave you apples.

T: :) They’ve only gotten better. *thinks for a moment, then smiles* All right, I’ve got one I’m certain’s going to have you absolutely stumped...when...did I know...that I‘d fallen in love with you?

E: .... *opens her mouth for a moment, then shakes her head* When?

T: :) Shortly after Adamant. The entire ordeal was...well, a nightmare, heh, but on the return journey, all I could think about was...getting back to you. To warmth and apples and conversations about something other than the Inquisition and just...being allowed to be Tamralan for a while. And when I got here, and...kissed you that first time...that’s when I knew. Of course it was all very brash and impulsive, but...I’ve never felt such a weight off my shoulders as I did that moment. Like...the entire world sighed with relief, because that was exactly what I should have done, and for that moment, with you, everything was...well, just perfect.

E: 10th of Solace. It...was a Thursday.

T: :) It was a Thursday.

E: :) And...you were warm.

tell me

of something fiercer

than the love with which

i gaze upon you

of something softer

than the tenderness

with which i hold you.

- Sanober Khan

——

A little surprise for @saphyremelodies, to pick her up from a rough week :D

Tamralan Lavellan and Emma Sparrow, and an absolutely perfectly depicted quiet moment together that I am at a complete loss for words to explain how much I completely and totally adore, commissioned from the very best @sunshinemage, who is an absolute darling and such joy to work with and I will wholeheartedly and perhaps even aggressively recommend you commission her until I am blue in the face forever and ever amen! There’s so much love between these two and you captured all of it like the wizard you are, my friend. :)

“I can’t sleep,” Tamralan explained when Emma sat across from him at a small table in the kitchen. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“I know. I was already awake.” Emma shifted a little in her chair, straightening her back. “I was unsure if you wanted company.”

One corner of his mouth lifted a little. “But you’re here anyway.”

“Yes.” Emma seemed to relax a little, mimicking his half-smile. “I’m here. Do you want to talk about it?”

Tamralan rubbed his forehead, then pinched the bridge of his nose. “Yes… No… Maybe?” He sighed, then reached across the table for Emma’s hand. He squeezed gently and ran his thumb over her knuckles. “It’s hard, you know, to know the truth and still have to lie.”

Emma didn’t look surprised by the statement. Perhaps, she already knew what he spoke of. He looked at their hands. “My memories have returned. This is an oversimplification, but I was at the wrong place at the wrong time. I interrupted Corypheus’ ritual, impulsively grabbed the orb, and the Divine and I were thrown into the Fade…. She sacrificed herself to ensure I came back.”

“I see.” Emma squeezed his hand then rested her other hand over his.

“And yet, everyone thinks it’s best to keep that secret for now.”

“Do you?”

There was a long pause, and he shook his head. “I don’t like lying to people. But, I understand why. People rallied under a certain cause, a certain ideal, and it wouldn’t do any favors now to change all that.”

“You don’t like keeping secrets.” Emma leaned forward. “You can’t change what people think. At least I know, and the people who matter know, and now, you know. There’s no uncertainty there. This may have been an accident, but it doesn’t change what you’ve accomplished, what you mean to so many people.” She paused, her eyes flitting away for a quick second. “What you mean to me.”

Tamralan stirred himself awake, unwrapping an arm from around Emma’s waist to stretch, grunting as his back popped from the effort. The sun streaked through the windows, casting the room in a warm glow, though provided little warmth itself. He kept his eyes stubbornly closed for a moment, snuggling against Emma once more, as if that would negate the fact that it was morning and he needed to start his day.

Fingers stroked his arm, and he smiled, kissing the back of her head. After squeezing her once more, he rolled over to push him up to sit on the edge of the bed. The draft in the room chilled his hot skin and a huge shiver wracked through his body. If he didn’t get up now, he would only slide back under the warm covers and never leave.

Before his foot could touch the ground, fingers wrapped around his wrist.

“Stay.”

Tamralan looked back to Emma with a crooked smile. “Is that really you, Emma? The Emma who had to drag me out of bed most mornings? Who cruelly snatches the blanket off my poor shivering body? Who won’t even speak to me until my feet touch the floor?”

Her fingers tightened around his wrist, lightly tugging him, and smiled at him. A genuine wide smile that left Tamralan breathless every time. “They will survive without your presence for a few hours more.”

“Hmmmm..” He tapped his chin with his free hand. “Only a few hours?”

She tugged again, harder. “You’re shivering. Are you really going to argue with me?”

He fell back into bed at her tugging, then wiggled back under the covers to press against her. Her grip loosened around his wrist and he laced her fingers with his. With his free hand, he tipped her chin to kiss her, at first, chaste, but turned languid and warm with desire that left them both breathless when parted. Her cheeks were flushed, eyes wide, and by the gods, he wasn’t going to pull away from her just yet.

:’)

Emma on Tamralan:

“I…it is a difficult thing to explain.  I suppose it would be simplest to say that I love him, I love his kindness, his laughter, his voice, his dedication to the people and ideas that matter to him, his touch, or even his very presence.  Love, however, is not a thing I have ever understood well, if I’ve ever understood it at all, and there is a great deal more to it than that.  Tamralan is a great deal more to me than that.

I have gained a great deal of control over my mind since my Tranquility was reversed, but…it was never…quite…right.  It is as though I am trying to balance a blade on my fingers while the weight is constantly shifting.  I can give the blade the appearance of balance, but not without considerable effort on my part to counter it as it wavers, and the constant, nagging knowledge that a single misstep would see me drop it, and that I cannot, under any circumstances, allow that to happen.  If the blade falls, the headaches come, I lose control, and I have no greater fear in all of my life than that.

Now, Tamralan does not reach out to steady the blade for me, nor does he see me struggle and take its burden from me entirely, or reassure me he will catch the blade should it fall.  He would. That sweet, silly man would, without question, if I asked. As would I for him, without question, were the circumstances reversed. If it were possible. Sometimes I think it distresses him that he cannot. Similarly, he does not suggest I move my fingers further to one side of the blade or the other, as it may help it balance easier.  It does, for a time, until the weight shifts again, but he knows I know that.  Tamralan instead places a table next to me, and tells me it is safe to simply put the blade down.  And, with him, it is.  It is safe to love him as he loves me, in a way that lets me know what it’s like not to need to balance a blade at all.  

So, I do.”

<3