Couples Therapist Critiques TherapyJeff’s Relationship Tips (With Love)

Welcome back to Figs & Teale. In this episode, we take a thoughtful and respectful look at TherapyJeff’s popular video, “10 Signs You’re in a Healthy Relationship.” Jeff’s work has helped millions start important conversations about love, boundaries, and emotional safety. As couples therapists, we deeply appreciate that—and we also want to slow things down and add the context that short-form advice can’t always hold.

Using an attachment-focused, systems-based lens and the Empathi Method, Figs walks through each of the ten signs and explores what they look like in real, lived relationships. We talk about why many of these “healthy signs” are not permanent states, but places couples visit, lose, and work hard to return to. From co-regulation to intimacy, boundaries, and repair, we explore how striving to achieve these traits can sometimes create pressure, shame, or self-rejection.