#ellenor

But it won’t stab.

WHY WONT IT JUST STAB?

My own body was stopping me, betraying from stabbing myself.

I look up at the mirror, blood smears staining my face.

I cut the target’s beating heart out of their chest. What the fuck is wrong with me?

His muffled voice echoed through the walkie talkie, but I just kept staring. My hands clenching at my chest. A burn mark had developed on my arm, and maybe I wanted to create more.

I grab my lighter from my pocket, flicking it on and off frantically to undo the haze. It doesn’t work.

My head spins. It makes me think of you, Kaid.

James Gallagher’s back injury questioned by Cal Ellenor after Bellator Dublin showdown was called off – The Sun

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CAL ELLENOR insists James Gallagher pulled out of their Bellator Dublin showdown because “he wasn’t ready” and should have “took his beating like a man”.

The two were set to go one-on-one at the 3 Arena on February 22 until the 23-year-old Irish star, who trains with Conor McGregor, was ruled out with a back injury last week.

3 James Gallagher’s back injury has been questioned by Cal…

It’s our last day 😩 and we’re currently on the ferry back across the Channel heading home. We have had such a fantastic time and have raised a brilliant amount of money for Ellenor in the process! This morning we left the campsite towards our first checkpoint which was The Spa - not an actual spa unfortunately as I think we both could have done with it!! - but a racetrack! We’re not sure if we actually made it to where we were supposed to be, but we got a picture with the sign anyway! Checkpoint 2 was La Coupole, a giant dome where the Germans used to launch rockets from! Our maps has been sending us all over the place today so we ended up going into Calais then realising it was wrong and having to turn around again to find it half an hour back 🙄 we eventually got there though and met up with a few of the other teams, Nessa hopped in for a ride and we made our way to checkpoint 3 - which everybody ended up being in different places! We went to Batterie Oldenburg which is a large gun battery which shelled our coastal towns throughout 1942 until its fall in 1944. That was either this place or Batterie Todt! No one’s too sure which is right! Haha after this it was time to make our way to the ferry terminal where we met up with others in the waiting area before making our way into line. The short ride onto the ferry was certainly a noisy one and the constant sirens and lights on board was definitely a sight to be seen! Everybody, scumrun or not, had their phones out recording!! We even blew up the air horn (sorry Dad!) 😂 prizes have been given and we’re pleased to announce that we won a prize!! A bottle of pink Lanson each and a model car! We won this for our fancy dress efforts, making all the checkpoints and being brave for coming on it with everyone in the first place as just two girls! Soon it’ll be time to say goodbye to our fellow 2019 Scumrunners and enjoy what will probably be a very noisy drive off the ferry!! The car’s certainly done us proud and if a busted horn and tattered flags is all the grief we’ve had, then I’ll take that! Pink Ladies are going to love you and leave you... thank you for following! 😘

Our last full day and with 2 cars worth of gear all packed in to our Pink Beauty we set off a little heavier to make our way to the Nurburgring!! After waving off the Dancing Queens who had to leave their car behind 😥 and being a man down ourselves by having to take out one of our T-Birds(!) we left Prague behind us to make our way to Germany... our only checkpoint for the day was the Nürburgring! As we made it there with plenty of time, we bought our ticket and headed to the track!! We made it round in a very respectable 14 minutes!! Jane did the driving and it was the most intense and nerve wracking drive I’ve ever done, but we did it and we made it in one piece!! Buzzing and on a high, we came off the track and air horned some fellow Scumrunners only to have 2 German marshalls shout at us and then get an English speaking German lady over to shout at us some more! We were made to pull over and park up while they liased with the police 👮‍♀️ eventually they decided to let us go without us having to actually speak to them but a couple of other teams weren’t so lucky! So basically, we learnt the hard way that flashing lights and air horns and apparently dash cams(!?) are not allowed on the Nurburgring! The campsite was only a few minutes drive so we had plenty of time to set up camp and rearrange the car. We all spent the evening at the campsite bar, then sat around a campfire afterwards until the early hours. Sad that it’s almost over but AMAZING to see that we’ve smashed our target and raised over triple what we set out to raise! We’re now at over £1500 on our JustGiving page - THANK YOU!!

Third day in and at our furthest point and it’s brought us to PRAGUE!! Three nights and three new places for us which is so amazing! It was an easier day driving today (needed after last night’s night out out!) so we have all managed to take it a little easier. The guys have all been great at checking up on us, even messaging the group WhatsApp (yes there’s a group chat with all 49 of us in which as you can imagine is mental, especially as there’s only actually 8 girls!) to make sure we were both with them all this morning - we obviously sent a super excited selfie as proof we were both good! We made both of our checkpoints, ended up in the middle of a Chinese dragon parade, experienced the biggest hail storm I’ve ever seen and found out that only the passenger side of the windscreen actually demists! Haha we got to the campsite and waited the rain out before pitching the tent, made our grub and headed into Prague as it’s still light out. We’ve had a wander round and found the cutest little gin bar called The Alchemist (definitely recommend if you ever visit) where we’re enjoying a quiet drink before going to join the others at a place called Double Trouble - that may not be so quiet!!! We’ll update you all tomorrow when we find out our destination for our final night x

81. How long have you been on tumblr?

um… technically i think I made one in 2014 but i didn’t really use it, but then i started to actually use it in like late 2015.

88. What are you scared of?

I think I’m afraid of losing control. I’m scared of the future and the fact that I can’t make it exactly how I want and literally write my own life story. I’m scared of the past and that anything that I do that I don’t like how it went I will replay over and over in my head. I’m scared that I won’t be able to let this want for control go even though I constantly tell myself that things will change unexpectedly and I just can’t do anything about it. 

I’m scared that I’ll never impact the world the way I want to. I’m afraid that I can’t control the world and my life enough to help as much as I can and make the world better. Also I’m really afraid of spiders like you know that moment when you’re in the shower and out of the corner of your eye you just see this little black thing on the wall moving yeah that’s terrifying.

95. Share your favorite quote.

Okay I have a tough time picking favorite anythings. but I like this one:

“Novels aren’t just happy escapes; they are slivers of people’s souls, nailed to the pages, dripping ink from veins of wood pulp. Reading the right one at the right time can make all the difference.”

Brandon Sanderson

also

“You are flawed, and struggling and uncertain. But it is so beautiful the way you try.”

Carmilla Karnstein

97. Do you like horror movies?