#elementofheeye

New scans of Coloring with Mom

New scans of Coloring with Mom

Development went okay... not the equipment's fault

Results from yesterdays 1st shoot with this setup. A true macro shot on 4x5, paper negative. I have a sense of accomplishment, I know this is basically a shit photo compared to what others with more experience can do, I don't strive for that perfection but the feeling of doing something different. The feeling of doing enough research to create an image like this... Yes, I can shoot with my digital camera, I can make an image with my phone... but this is basic, and I am cool with this... while in seconds AI is unleashing hell on the internet I am taking my time and learning and using patience to create. I don't share everything I do, I make a ton of mistakes and I forget to do steps... hell during this experience, I loaded my film holder wrong, I put the paper in upside down... ha, that might have been my best shot and I thought about reloading and doing it again.... but you know there is tomorrow, which isn't guaranteed but at least I didn't stress over the mistake. That is process in my book. This camera will be an awesome tool this winter when it's cold outside. Someday maybe I will invest in a Large Format Macro Lens... but this got me to a place I needed to be.

HP5-400- this is manipulated, Exposure, highlights and shadow slider. I am curious to see how it prints. this is just a DSLR pic of the negative on a lightbox. It was metered at ISO 200, direct sunlight 1\100th @ f8, I still have some FPP 200 Frankenstein to develop. Fun little trip to Laurel Lake.

not much sleep, between the wind and my mind being all wierd. I colored with mom last night. It always stirs wierdness in my dreams. Maybe a glimpse at what she is going through, feeling lost, in a place that doesn't make sense. Looking for my dad, at one point in a dream I was wondering through the halls of a huge hotel. Couldn't find my room, I would see people that I knew but they didn't want to help. People in the street would bump into me and not say anything, they just looked at me and smiled. I watched someone almost get hit by a truck… and the truck just kept going. I wake up with my hands clenched and in a tight ball. Today will be a long day, I am tired and upset. Upset that my dad is dealing the best he can… far better that he did with me as I was growing up. I can't remember who said it… but it was on the Graham Norton Show… they were talking about someone dies after having Alzheimer's they said that "they passed years before but forgot to take their body." That really seems to be what I feel like.

a problem with focus, and exposure. I believe you could read into this with looking at this image and even with out an image at all. I look back through my blog and look at the range of things I post. For me that is an emotion with every post, I even get embarrassed when I look back sometimes, but other posts give me joy and make me smile. These paper negatives are tricky, the camera is a late 1950's Speedgraphic, Pacemaker. It shoots 4x5 negatives or if I choose to I can put a 120mm camera back on it and shoot a roll of 120, it is a fun camera. Not the camera I would choose if I were to shoot something really important or on the fly. As the camera setup it is pretty limited, and shooting paper negatives even strangles it further. I will probably post another tomorrow from this day. warning it too is out of focus, but I kind of dig it... do you?

not to infinity