#eldritches

I've very quickly learned that this is honestly 100% true. It's not that They have bad intentions, but that rather you *have* to follow Their directions or risk losing *everything*, wonderfully twisting your arm.

Elditches can and will fucking ruin your life, inherently. They will fundamentally change you as a being if you go down this Path, whether by accident/happenstance or because, like me (evidently this is rare?), you Chose it after receiving the Call and its beckoning and decided to dive straight into it.

To be perfectly clear, I believe this is not a punishment so much as a natural consequence of getting involved with this stuff. It's not a punishment, it's just that if you don't do what They say they have no problem retracting all of Their comforting and support this incarnation and leaving you in the dust, though They still love you as a being.

My blessings certainly come with caveats. I'm not saying pacts with other deities any different, but there's something inherently fearsome about that that 1) makes you not want to step out of line, and 2) makes you glad you're Their Child and not some other composition just getting vamped by eldritch.

They are "kind and sweet", They are helpful, They bestow gifts. But all of this is at a cost, and you have no idea what it is until you enter into a pact with Them and are informed of said consequences. It's the pain of being alone, it's the pain of losing support, it's the pain of losing your deities. And that hurts more than any punishment, the thought of Them abandoning you (BPD rule-out go brrr?).

Hello, all. I made a survey for eldritches and eldritch workers to take, for research purposes.

I am interested in tracking commonalities and what humans would regard as "anomalies" among this population, as well as gathering experiences in general.

This survey is open to "eldritchkin" as well, though keep in mind I am looking for well thought out/considered answers to the long form questions, not "yeah i'm eldritch, tendrils go brrr".

For primary sources consult The Temple by HPL.

General Correspondences (stars are best guesses):

Epithets: The Laureled One

enn: Hardaes Gloon Ensayes Hah

direction: South

Time of day: night, dawn, the afternoon

colors: silver, sea blue, ivory/white, possibly green, black, and gold

Materia: ivory, sea-stone. any gemstones from the sea, perhaps obsidian.

Symbols/themes: sunken ships, underground cities, false light, Hellenism, art (stonework), curses, communication, violence, condemnation, paranoia and delusion, [TW] suicide

power over the dead/resurrection, embodiment, reality bending, the depths of the unconscious.

Genealogy: I do not know in all honesty. i think the idea of him being a child of Umr-At-Tawil might hold some merit considering the laurel in the ivory image and the false light created by his... underwater temple. as well as the "purity" and "condemnation" talked about by the sailors. Nyarlathotep could perhaps be equal in this regard considering he more easily effects people with more spiritual persuasions or more percepetive/inuitive people, and how easily Gloon interrupts the ship's communications and function of the ship itself.

I have dysphoria over not feeling incredibly cramped in my body, lol.

Maybe it will improve things because I will actually be at full expression intstead of literally holding myself back.

I'm guessing a start would be taking my shields down? (usually ill advice but believe me, i really don't need them right now) and then coming up with a better defense solution.

Also, is there any way to gain phantom limb sensstions? I think they would be fascinating and help ease some of my dysphoria.