Solitude is a double-edged sword. Sitting here lost in my thoughts, the doubt, fear and shame are amplified, peace of mind elusive. Hopes of companionship and belonging just a pipe dream, the self-confidence as absent as anyone. The noise is deafening, and sometimes it feels like the only way to hush the many voices of my conscience is to take a step forward into the bosom of the waters before me. But the beauty of the place cannot be ignored. The wind rustling through the trees, birds chirping their dusk lullabies, the gentle rippling of the river against the shore, the rhythmic hum of planes large and small departing from Tegel. The hushed tones of several languages drifting towards me—the regular sound of the group of old Russian men fishing and sharing tales, a group of teenage German girls gossiping and giggling, the melodies of a singing Spanish trio sat cross-legged with their classical guitars. And then the solitude is broken by an uninvited guest—a soggy white Labrador with a pink plastic ball in its mouth, tail wagging and eyes gleaming. I say hello and reach out to scratch behind her ears, as her owner calls her name in slight panic—Emma, Emma.. I look up and smile at the owner and her friend, allaying her fear. As soon as they appeared, they are gone, laughing to each other as the round the corner of the small island on which I sit, realising that Emma was rather drenched. With that another plane hums overhead, and I return to the Murakami short story I was reading, coincidentally about a solitary man. #murakami #berlin #life #thoughts #tegel #eiswerder #spree
