#dv 1

@of-incredible-beauty

So... Everything that happened just now was absolutely freaking terrible! Awful! Horrifying! First, those monsters... And those red orbs... Were those actually real!? And they actually attacked... Matthew rubbed a bruise that marred the side of his face as he recalled with an accuracy that terrified him. No, no, no! He didn’t want to be thinking about that! 

But, how could he not? It was so disgustingly visceral, and now he’s being told that they need to kill each other? That there’s a freaking Dracula resurrection going on!? Seriously, what the hell!? Matthew was more than freaking out, and he absolutely despised everything that was going on. He didn’t want to be crying, but he was totally crying.

And now he’s got a flip phone. Great. Living in 30XX and using a flip phone. The rooms they were staying in were all so dingy and small and everything was so terrifying and awful and Matthew really hated this and he really just wanted to go home. 

His roommate, too... Matthew didn’t think he ever even caught her name. They just ended up together. This sucked. He was just sitting there, crying, like an idiot. His stupid face hurt, the whole stupid thing sucked, and he all he was doing was whining internally like a petulant child. Finally, he decided to work up the nerve to say something to his new roommate. 

“Um, I’m Matthew,” he just barely sniffled out. “S-sorry, y-you got stuck with me.” He tried for a self-deprecating laugh, but it just came out as more of a genuine cry. 

uhhhh well you see. it’s a little bit hard to explain

but basically, a few weeks ago-ish, someone made an anti-mcytblr post. this is the post:

some MCYT fans reblogged it in an ironic way, to be like, “haha look at this, yeah we do look kind of stupid”

and then inniter made this post as a reference to it:

so then, once inniter opened the floodgates, more and more people started to make funny references to that original anti-mcytblr post.

eventually what happened is people would get into full on fake arguments, all of us posting satire pretending to act like twitter users who were defending their faves. people starting writing analysis and meta and making shitposts… all about these minecraft youtubers who do not even exist.

someone proposed skins for the imaginary youtubers:

and immediately, fanart began to take off.

people started making comics and art and full-on character analysis, just making up what was “canon” as they went. there wasn’t official lore, but admiral_anus and milfboss were both fan favorites. i don’t remember who made milfboss, but her skin was a catmaid and art of her was on the front page of tumblr.

one thing led to another, and the tag “penis SMP” was trending at the highest spot on tumblr for nearly 24 hours.

i wish i was joking.

anyway that’s the story of penis smp— there’s a lot of other characters and storylines that got made up, and im sure you can find posts about them under the “penis smp” tag.

(tommy’s just messing with him)