#draymalaise

Better

Now we're watching a show

That makes me want to be happy,

And I know I'm too tired to cry,

But I tighten my grip on your hand and I sob

And you look at me then, and you sigh.

And your face has that look

That makes me wish I were better,

And your eyes make me want to be seen,

But instead of embracing those difficult feelings

I look back, ashamed, at the screen.

Hypnosis

I shatter onto

Our bed laid bare,

Shards of myself

Cutting the mattress

On the floor,

A bundle of

Glittering glass and

Clotting tears,

And you grind me

To sand beneath

The heel of your boot.

How can you stomach this?

How can you swallow so easily

What I can barely touch?

6:30

In bed with a corpse and a cockroach,

I witness a sunrise set to a song

That I haven't heard in years, 

that's stuck in my head,

And it makes my shoulders ache,

But my eyes still feel fine,

And I’ve never slept before,

So why start now?

And I come to realize

That despite all of the empty promises

I'm not a daughter or a son,

A human or a man,

I'm never anything at all. 

Help me understand. 

Don't look at me. Don't call me that.

I don't know who I am. 

I'm no-one. I'm not anyone. 

And they've been crooked from the start—

An ironic reflection of my soul,