Southern Jonathan Crane using double and triple contractions


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Southern Jonathan Crane using double and triple contractions

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Jonathan Crane and his southern grammar (or lack there of if you ask Alfred probably)
Southern Jonathan Crane giving aneurysms to everyone around him
Category:English double contractions - Wiktionary, the free dictionary
if y’all’d’ve asked, I’d’ve told you, but y’all’ven’t, so I’lln’t explain.

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What’s Up with Double Contractions?
You should generally avoid using double contractions—at least in formal writing. Contractions of any kind are generally frowned upon in formal writing, so you can bet that double contractions are twice as bad.
If you were to use double contractions in conversations, we doubt that anyone would correct you. For instance, if you said, “I’d’ve (I would have) gotten that question right,” none of your friends are likely to point out that you shouldn’t have used a double contraction.
However, your professor, teacher, or editor will definitely criticize you if you use “you’ll’ve (you will have)” in an essay. Some of them—rightly or wrongly—even take points off for common single contractions such as “it’s,” “I’m,” and “they’re.”
You don’t even save that much time by using double contractions. According to our extremely nonscientific research,
“I would have” = 2.01214 seconds to type ⏲
“I’d’ve” = 2.01212 seconds to type ⏲
💁 Saving a whopping 0.00002 seconds and incurring the wrath of a teacher in the process is just not worth the pain.
What’s up with double contractions?
A contraction, as you know, is a word resulting from shortening an original form, e.g., don’t (do not), won’t (will not), shouldn’t (should not).
A double contraction is something like this:
It’s the shortened form of “I would have.”
We’ve been asked in the past whether it’s acceptable to use double contractions. Well, contractions of any kind are generally frowned upon in formal writing, so you can assume that double contractions are doubly disapproved. (But the level of aversion varies from teacher to teacher, so ask yours whether he or she accepts contractions on writing assignments.)
On the other hand, if you were to use double contractions in conversations, we doubt that anyone would say anything. For instance, if you said, “I’d’ve gotten that question right,” none of your friends are likely to point out that you shouldn’t have used a double contraction. In spoken English, double contractions are fine (but we would recommend not using them during a job interview or something as formal).
Keep in mind that your professor, teacher, or editor will definitely criticize you if you use something like “you’ll’ve” (you will have) in your writing. It is not only a double contraction but also an eyesore. It hurts to look at it.
Therefore, take our advice and don’t use double contractions. There really is no need to do so.
You don’t even save that much time by using the contractions:
Typing “I would have” → 2.01214 seconds.
Typing “I’d’ve” → 2.01211 seconds.
Saving a whopping 0.00003 seconds—and sounding not as smart in the process—is just not worth it. 😏
TL;DR Use double contractions when you talk to your friends. Don’t use them in any writing assignment.
Right, Jonghyun?
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