#dn asks

Beyond is like... a personification of identity issues and that resonates with me.

I'm intrigued by this idea of getting lost in who you are, whether you're really you or just a mirror of someone else. Whether anyone is ever really anyone, or if we're all just reflections of each other. What we see and what we don't see. What we can recognize and what we can't.

It's also really interesting to me when thinking about L, and why/how did he let that happen. People like to say Beyond is the evil version of L, but I think his existence makes L's darker, actually. Yet another game with the mirrors...

I was struck reading LABB that B chose victims who were already about to die. I found this detail humanizing, or at least giving him depth, and it made me want to explore his humanity, try to understand him.

I'm also just a sucker for tragic characters lmfao. It's so sad, how he felt this need to play a game by himself... Left behind by both A and L, all he has is himself, but he's been taught that's not enough, that he failed because he couldn't let go of himself to stand in as someone else.

So yeah. I find it interesting to think about how these things can warp in his head. What does he really think about all of this, how self aware is he of his own thought process, where does the insanity begin and how deep does it run?

There's also the differences with Light, BeyondLaw vs LawLight, but this is already getting long haha.

Okay so I know I'm obsessed with identity issues but it's my angle so just humor me. I think with Beyond it's quite obvious (W&S is kind of my thesis on this), but I think Light has them too. I wrote about it here.

Beyond projects his identity issues onto L, but Light projects them onto Kira, L's rival. So from L's perspective, I think Light is a lot more intriguing. It actually leaves room for L to play against someone else. I think Light is flattering to L in a way Beyond can only pretend to be, and I think L can build something with Light when he can only really tear Beyond down.

I know people say Light is fake af etc, but I don't really see him that way all that much. I think Light is pretty strong tbh, and Beyond is the one who's fabricated. I just love thinking of Beyond as a predecessor for Kira. It's so tragic, like if he fixated on becoming L when really... he was just L's trial run all this time...

I'm probably just drawn to dysfunctional BeyondLaw and then healthy LawLight lmao. From L's POV, it's hurt/comfort. BeyondLaw is the hurt and LawLight is the comfort.

I think it's writing Mind Haze that kinda put this idea in my head, and I really need to think about it further before spewing more nonsense, but I intend to write a BeyondLaw prequel to explore this. How they had something strong, too, but ultimately unstable. BeyondLaw fails the soulmate test but LawLight passes.

Anyway. Obviously I'm not tied to this, I like thinking about different scenarios, but I think this is what I tend to gravitate towards, especially when the three of them are involved. It's what I did in WHN and Mind Haze, and it's what I plan to do in my grief AU... But I will give BeyondLaw a happy ending one day, I promise! Possibly starting with this AU (which was really about me wanting to write a strong friendship teehee).

It reps my eternal boredom, loneliness, and difficulty connecting with people.